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@huntskaiju : ❝ i need you. ❞ ( rin, to soma. ) / accepting!
Soma nearly comes, just from hearing that.
Stars in their eyes, their chest, the pit of their stomach, the kindness the sweetest praise this body could ever ask for. They shudder, gasp, choke out an, "Ah, f - fuck, Rin ———"
Rin is so —— they're just so beautiful, and not even the way they think they are. That, too, of course, the pretty hair and pretty skin, but it's more than that to the god - girl - that - isn't. Rin is beautiful not because their body is beautiful — though it is — but because of what they do with it, how they fight and protect. How they look coated in blood. When they lick their lips. When they look at Soma like that, on top of her, looking down at her, eyes aflame and hungry. Rin is so beautiful. Rin is glittering, scant light reflecting, refracting, glowing like a thousand sharp, perfect stars. And Rin wants to use this body. Rin wants this body. Rin needs ———
"Soma," Rin says, almost a question, checking in, and the glittering shining starlight brightens, flares. Soma feels this body's chest flood with something glowing. RIN NEEDS SOMA? A few months prior, the idea alone would have driven Soma to tears. Now, her eyes mist, but she doesn't cry, just shudders in Rin's hands, just pulls her down closer. Rin's hips and the strap on them / inside Soma still as she lets her do it, maybe not sure if Soma can handle more, but she can, and she shows it, she needs it, unbreakable and nearly - claw like nails digging into Rin's back hard. She whimpers into her neck, bites enough to hurt, not enough to draw blood, doesn't want to erase more of herself just this moment. RIN NEEDS SOMA. RIN NEEDS SOMA. SOMA NEEDS RIN, AND WOULD LOVE HER EVEN IF SHE DIDN'T.
"I — mm, I'm g - good. Feels so good. This body's so —— 'm so close." They want to kiss her — their lips leave her throat to press to her cheek, then her mouth. Rin's so beautiful. Soma is crying, suddenly, not out of grief or sadness — not mostly — so much as awe. No sunrise has ever been as perfect as Rin is, this moment. No sunset has ever been as loved as Rin is, this moment, and as Rin will be, for as long Soma exists, which is to say forever. "Need you, too, please —— say — y' need me again?"
Rin smiles / their cheeks move / the shimmering light refracts a little different. Their pace goes almost punishing, and she rewards the loving roughness by clinging harder, hard enough to bruise. When Rin breathes the words into Soma's ear, the glow goes blinding, and Soma comes apart in a sea of shining light and Rin's loving hands.
his stare is unchanging as she speaks her peace / as she lays down and accepts the blade of his guillotine. the pity on his tongue turns rancid, something disgusting that leaves gen grimacing against such a docile display. wasn't she meant to carry the shinomiya name? had isao only taught his daughters to be merciless in the face of a kaiju? or had sagan simply forgotten that before being a man, narumi gen was a monster?
he had no problem in offering a cruel reminder. it had been easy enough with kikoru, it will be easy enough with sagan. ❛ yeah, that's the answer i expected to hear. it's probably a family thing, the way you just mindlessly follow directions. ❜ maybe it was because there had never been room for love to bloom within his heart / thrown at an early age into a field of prickling bramble. gen had learned early on that survival comes from biting the hand that feeds, had even sunk his fangs into the meat of isao's palms— only for that man to remind gen of where he stood within the division.
even to this day, gen continues the bad habit of snapping his jaws. isao, for all he was able to accomplish, never managed to declaw the animal that was narumi gen.
a shame the same can't be said for his own daughters.
back straightens and gen reaches up to work at a knot of tense muscles along his neck. maybe he should visit the baths for some relaxation. ❛ the defense force and clozer will continue to professionally engage with one another for the purpose of protection against kaiju attacks. ❜ spoken like a manual, he has no doubt shinomiya will appreciate the gesture. but it morphs to something meaner at the next question, something with the intention of provoking. ❛ and you'll just keep following the orders of a dead man, right? not even gonna fight for what you want? ❜
narumi is cruel. sagan has heard it all before. ❝ i'm afraid to disappoint you, captain narumi, but this is what i want. ❞ their voice is soft, gentle, like placating a snarling dog. in this moment, they feel like their father / like they're on the other side of that phone call, moving chess pieces into perfect position. maybe what narumi says is true; maybe all a shinomiya is good for is following directions. but if it saved the world, if it kept one more life from being taken, could she say no?
could he?
she smooths the wrinkles in her coat with a steady hand. ❝ until the dimensional gates are closed, i will keep doing what must be done. it's not about honoring isao-san, even if i strive to. it's about protecting lives. ❞ others may consider it a burden. sagan is merely giving giving back what she's been given. hikari had saved her life. kikoru had accepted her as family. isao had trusted her with the power to face any threat. even if suited tells her she has a death wish, even if chester tells her she frustrates him but supports all of her reckless plans, even if so many of her comrades have fallen under her orders ... suited still sends her off with a laugh. chester still supports her reckless plans. her comrades still believe in her orders. the shinomiyas are still her family.
this outpouring of trust, companionship, love—— can't narumi see? sagan wouldn't be who she is without it all.
it's why they return his cruelty with patience. they stare at him with no judgement, no malice; nothing but unimaginable grace, even against the gleam of a butcher's knife. ❝ is that so reprehensible? ❞
— suited is a total control freak in bed. everything is calculated to a t! this goes hand in hand with how she typically enjoys sex—— she much, much prefers to watch her partner instead. in fact she's perfectly fine with not getting off as long as her partner does. sex to them is better when 90% of the attention is on her partner, which is complimented by the fact that suited loves to push her partners to the limit.
— it heavily enjoys using bondage, toys, etc.—— you can't tell me it doesn't have a blueprint of at least one sex toy in the works.
— i suppose this is where i reveal it's a dom and doesn't lean any other way. despite how bratty its personality is, suited does not sub at all! it would never give up any semblance of control. in fact, anything where she gets to feel in control is great for her—— being fully clothed vs her partner being naked, her partner being tied up, making her partner wait, etc.—— it really gets her going.
— if asked suited will #strapup, especially when it wants to be physically close to it partners. it'll still be just as mean, if not more.
— i think setting up a scene is also something suited really really loves doing. it's cathartic to have it finally play out, but it also feels nice to dedicate herself to the process. day off, and she'll be vibrating off the walls in anticipation!
— i also really don't think there's any chance in hell you could embarrass suited—— she's just shameless. if you try to tease her for being eager or for being a control freak or the like, she'll just laugh and agree. and also find a way to turn it around on you. you're in her bed, after all, so you must find it attractive!
some commit such displays in acts of showiness— and honestly, personally, that’s all mana can think of for why anyone else would have such attention stealing acts ( unless of course, within all the definite showboating there are few like mana. ones who just do it. ) there is no real reason to it— no split second thought.
it was there, and their mind processed that and its application first. perhaps an odd habit, but one they don’t do too often: for previous reasons. attention, attention, attention— it’s terrifying. it’s uncomfortable. they’d much rather just do their job and be passed by blissfully each day. it makes it all easier. in flares and prevailing moments of stress, which filter to annoyance, which turns to physical outlet— but mana would sooner do ten laps than admit its effectively a way to blow off some steam during combat.
so yes, however impressive a throw mana can put on, it will never be faster than that of which comes from the barrel of a gun.
“ it was there. ” but maybe that's not the kind of answer mina is expecting. “ these parts of infrastructure will be unused. unfixable, and just replaced. so there’s no real harm in utilizing it in my opinion. ” their tongue gets caught on the roof of their mouth in second thought, “ i suppose i also think it’s good if i can use my environment to my advantage in as many ways as possible. there are no guarantees that i will always have a weapon when i need it. ”
it's a fairly straightforward answer. ❝ i see. thank you for answering, sevaess-san. ❞ mina exhales softly, slowly; it's not what she expected. not the impulsivity, or—— whatever it can be called. no, she had expected a sheepish smile, stumbling sentences / a scramble to hide from their superior officer / but mana does none of that. how refreshing it is, to be able to see her coworkers in full. and yet the wording of it catches his attention. ‘ i suppose ’ —— mina hums, letting a hand trail over bakko's back as he debates how to approach it, debates pointing it out at all. it's still an excuse, even if it's not as showy as the ones he's faced in the past.
( it's still a chasm, one that she doesn't know how to bridge. )
❝ i don't believe there's anything wrong with having some fun. ❞ there are few joys in the defense force; he'd never tell his officers off for indulging themselves. mina lets bakko go run off to pick at debris or kaiju bodies or whatever it is he does, and turns to mana. is fun the wrong way to put it? she isn't sure what to call it.
( others can indulge themselves; captain ashiro, however, cannot. of course she'd never understand it. )
❝ regardless, something like this isn't liable for a write-up. if it ever becomes an issue, simply let me know, ❞ not that it should, ❝ although i'm sure most officers do the same. ❞ it's all she has left to say; if anything, it's a poorly hidden switch of the conversation, but she'd never claim to be good at such things.
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rin picks up one night stands while on her days off! i think she has a lot of dalliances/strictly sexual relationships but tends to keep things outside of the force, because it gets too messy otherwise ( and in the case that she has to turn people down for an actual relationship ) awkward very fast, which is especially detrimental with how much teamwork is required in the force.
in one night stands, rin is very laid back about her wants and preferences. maybe a bit too much, but rin is looking for a brief moment of fun, and typically finds that people don't tend to cater to her needs as well. as long as she gets off, she won't care about the specifics of it. with friends with benefits / casual relationships, however, rin is a lot more straightforward about them! generally: rin likes it rough, loves marks and bruises ( both giving and receiving ), did i mention she likes it rough?
her biggest want in a partner is someone who can treat her as rough as she wants / needs. this is why she's laid back with around 99% of her partners, and only has two real switches: ‘ i don't care ’ and ‘ please make it hurt ’. she's more of a masochist than a sadist but is open to both. kinkswise, a non-exhaustive list: impact play, overstimulation / edging, bondage ( especially predicament bondage )—— typically receiving, but if her partner asks, she'd be happy to oblige.
It's strange — to be reminded that not everyone knows, just by looking at her. Soma is still learning to plan, to do more than simply react; it hadn't occurred to her to tell Rin before it could come to light with violence. She probably should have. It might have been upsetting, to see Soma die while thinking of her as a person rather than the tool she is. "Yes! I die lots. For help people, or for CLOZER study." Everyone at CLOZER is used to it ( uses it? ), though Sagan rarely seems happy with Soma's deaths, even when they save others. They're making an effort not to die carelessly, if only to lessen the worry they don't understand. "This body comes back after little time. Not die forever. Sorry, should have told."
❝ you—— wait, wait. ❞ rin pulls a hand back to rub at their eyes, unable to hide the grimace on their face. it’s less about the dying—— no, actually, it is a big part of it, but they’re caught on something else. her hand falls ❝ for clozer’s studies? you die so they can study you? ❞ they can’t quite stop the anger. it raises their voice, clips the ends of their words—— rin inhales, takes a breath. she’s not mad at soma, she could never be, but she—— soma says it like it’s nothing. it’s almost laughable, if it didn’t make her heart hurt. ( a fleeting thought: rin shouldn’t be this mad, not when the defense force does questionable things, too. but it’s different—— it’s different with soma, like they’re taking advantage. a dead soldier should stay dead. ) ❝ do they make you die? ❞ do they kill you?
The god - girl sits, getting as comfortable as they can in a body trying to rip itself to tiny pieces — it's nice, to come back like this. With someone there to greet them, to fill them in, who tells them to sit rather than just ushering them back out to fight and die and kill some more. Soma's not sure what to do when treated like a person. Suited's a nice middle ground; with her, Soma's still a tool, but a well cared for one.
"Oh, yay. Have thank Sagan." They don't like dying — they lose the memories, of course, and if they die in the midst of a battle they leave others to clean up the mess. And Sagan always gets sad about the dying in a way Soma doesn't understand. But better them than anyone else. "Glad people okay. Hope not too scary. Um — any new...um...data?"
there are a variety of things soma could be asking about—— suited hums, clicking through the various programs on its monitors, debating which ones to answer first, if at all. not to hide anything from soma, but ... well, it's not exactly sure if soma would be able to stay awake through all its ramblings. ❝ well, we got nothing from the dimensional gate except a bad omen. they're opening just a bit faster than our predictions. ❞ which is, hm, bad, especially when suited knows its predictions aren't the issue, but it's not a concern yet. ❝ and from your death? mmm, nothing much. just that you took longer, but that's to be expected. ❞
it’s been a while, after all. and sagan may be disgruntled by how often clozer sends soma out, but the truth is that she’s good—— she really doesn’t die too much at all. it just makes it all the more unfortunate when they do. ❝ anything new that you can feel? ❞
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it must hurt, having to carry all that weight. she is shackled to the ghosts of her past, the shinomiya name a noose of expectations tightly wound around her neck. her legacy has already been placed before her, after all; who is she if she does not continue to act within what's been required of her?
well? who is she truly, if stripped away from the shinomiya name?
gen does not soften his blow as he swings his bayonet to meet her axe head on, sending electrical currents of pink and gold dancing around the room. the force behind her swing is brutal, heavy with everything she wasn't properly wording. that's fine— gen preferred actions to words, anyways.
there is a numbness to his right hand, an aftereffect of their clash and gen gives himself a metaphorical pat on the back for unleashing their combat levels beforehand. it's what helps him stand steady, what allows him to use the previous momentum to swing again and again— the room trembling with every point of contact made.
shinomiya had always been as brutish as her father but an animal will always bite harder when forced within a corner.
but if isao had managed to stand firm against the fury of emotions gen had thrown his way, then he too could handle the storm that was his daughter. ❛ and now you're trying to lie to your superior officer! or are you trying to convince yourself? ❜ it's painful, to be left behind. he has to yell now, to make sure his voice is heard over the screams of clashing metal. ❛ quit pretending like this shit doesn't piss you off! who are you trying to fool? ❜
they can do nothing but brace themself behind their axe against each of narumi's hits, shoulders hunched and curved inwards as they hide behind it. now, they really do feel like a little girl, wielding an axe too big for them to grow into. but it's not the blows that make them flinch / he demands for her to go wild / kikoru doesn’t know if they can.
( kikoru’s scared to let go. )
❝ i’m not lying, ❞ she grits out, darting to the side to escape his onslaught. it buys her precious time to—— to do what? she can keep dodging, keep running, get away, but it won’t make him stop. he won’t, even if it hurts her. she does so anyways and pretends she’s chasing her mother’s ghost ( pretends it’s the best thing for her to do ). ❝ i’m not trying to fool anyone! i—— ❞ she feints a dodge and shields herself with the curve of her axe as if it’ll be enough of an answer.
what is does she feel, anyways?
kikoru wants to squeeze his eyes shut / like the bliss of a reprieve would do anything, fix everything—— but if he does, he’ll be caught. so he keeps them open, refuses to look away from the monstrous retinas in front of him. they glow like they can burn away all his lies. ❝ i just—— i—— i wish i’d known! ❞ that’s the truth, isn’t it? he wished they told him. he wished papa had simply said sagan would disappear for a little while, that they could see each other just as soon as the holidays rolled back around—— her sister had promised him something similar when she left for college, just before her plane took her overseas. instead, he got a fake grave to visit.
her emotions push between her words, between her teeth; her admittance would be passable if she hadn’t choked on it. kikoru pushes, swings the bayonet away and to the side and backs away, her heart caught on her throat. she’s a good sister, a good daughter—— she shouldn’t dare to second guess.
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