I'm not here to please you.

when an animal doesn’t like me it really impacts my self esteem 

how dare u reblog my posts but not follow me

If you find a gold bar in a trash bag, will you take the whole trash can, or just the gold bar?

the fuck

cold af

*writes down time of death*

If you’re an astronaut and you don’t say “I just need space” when you break up with someone, then you’re just wasting everybody’s time…

Anyone who doesn’t know the wonder and glory of Ken M, google it. The greatest troll alive and he does it without calling anyone a fa**ot.

your standards should be high for both your friendships and romantic relationships. everyone you surround yourself with should have qualities you actually admire.

When medication says “do not operate heavy machinery” they’re probably mainly referring to cars, but my mind always goes to forklift.