Sweet Jane

I WAS BORN YESTERDAY. I JUST BLEW IN FROM STUPID TOWN. THIS IS MY FIRST RODEO. PLEASE BE PATIENT WITH ME.

its awesome that neither mind reading nor god are real and all of the thoughts inside of your head are completely private and consequenceless forever #myprivacy

Man this store has a weird playlist, it's all Weird Al songs but with the lyrics switched out for ones that aren't funny.

when I was a kid I didn’t know what sex was but I knew it had something to do with the Swiss chocolatier from the Lindt commercials

old Welsh women are insane and wonderful I just heard the phrase ‘I’ve got such bad luck I could fall into a pit of cocks and come out sucking my thumb’

you can post on tumblr even when you're trying to take a break from social media it literally doesn't count. it's like pepsi max, or pescatarianism

i'll even pirate free things. you wouldn't understand

i bet it feels good as fuck to intend to do something and then actually do it

they should invent a body that feels normal to be inside of

well if its for fucked up and horny reasons, then i guess its okay...

If I was a knight would you let me swear oaths to you be honest

Pleaaase bro just let me be your blade

cherry bomb voice Hello tumblr hello blog

her eyes were the sickly green of the sky before a tornado, and to his horror he discovered she could throw cows around just as easily

to his horror? weak shit. outta my way gayboy im boutta get it