Overheard at hogwarts

A ravenclaw perfect and a slytherin perfect walked past me very obviously fresh out of the bath when the slytherin stopped dead and whispered “My L’oreal” before sprinting back the way they came but the best part is the ravenclaw sighed and said “Again?” before following at a much slower pace I’m crying where do i get friends like that

some muggle borns introduced everyone to civil war and a fight broke out when someone said bucky barnes would be in slytherin

had to sit down in the hallway to compose myself after i walked by two pure-blood slytherins and all i heard was “All i want to know is what is naruto and is it contagious.”

i was sitting outside on the grass because there was an impromptu group study session and this gryffindor 7th year leans over to me and asks if i want some weed, to which i say no I’m good. so after about 20 seconds i forget about it thinking he’s not going to reply but then I’m not kidding a solid 3 minutes passed before he said “awesome.” stared right at me and then fell asleep on my shoulder

one of my favorite things about our school robes is that i can wear shorts under it and kick my leg out when something dramatic happens and the shocked look on other kids faces is amazing

i just walked by two ravenclaws and all i heard was “i showed this hufflepuff nightcore and now they keep trying to talk to me about it, i don’t even listen to it i just wanted them to leave me alone!”