if i look back, i am lost
Mike Driver
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izzy's playlists!
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@howcanidescribemylife
I just realized today that I don't keep count on how long I haven't self harmed anymore?! I guess it's because I know that now I will never self harm again and I have completely recovered. How long as it been.. maybe 3 years (or so) clean of self harm now!!!
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Eagerly looking forward to 2018 as I'll be moving out of my family home and also going to the Philippines and Korea for the first time!
Had such a fun and relaxing week in Brighton with my favourite buddy =)
2017 so far..
Well I rarely update any of my social media lately because I'm very happy and content with being away from social media and doing things outside in reality. 2017 feels like it's gone super quick! And I've been able to do so much this year, a few of my best highlights so far have been: - Turning 23 years old - Getting an unexpected job that I really enjoy - Celebrating 3 year anniversary with my partner - Celebrating 7 years of friendship with my partner - Going to Scotland with my partner and his family for 3 days - Making more friends and being able to hang out with old friends now - Getting back in touch with old college friends and keeping up to date - Experiencing new things: food, jobs, places I'm still looking forward to the rest of 2017 and hope that I'll be able to experience much more. Like my first holiday off work next month and I'm planning on going to France with my partner!!! And also I'm going to the Philippines and Japan next year with my partner and his family too .. very exciting!
Happy birthday Kate 💙💙💙
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Things have been going more smoothly lately and it's making me look forward to the future years. I've fitted in really well at work, I love my job, and I love how practical and skillful I can be in the work environment! I'm happy to work 5 days a week and sometimes even 6 days a week, I've been given a pay rise last month and recieving a good steady income. At this rate I really do think I will be able to move out by this time next year or even soon in 2018! I'm very excited to be working hard on these goals and I do hope to keep improving myself steadily and make smooth progress with everything :)
My baby Mango 😚
Doing one small thing a day helps me feel better about being productive, rather than always feeling depressed because I’m a lazy poop.
Some of the things I might try to do each and every other day:
Laundry
Cook a meal from scratch
Do exercise
Go for a walk
Draw something
Watch a film (I know this sounds lazy/waste of time, but I felt like I haven’t had time to sit and watch a film alone for years because I’m too busy being lazy and nothing else really)
Have a full/lengthy conversation a friend
Take a long bath
Writing a post on my new Blogger blog
Taking care of my skin and body by remembering to do daily skincare routines (I don’t take care of myself well and wouldn’t use any skincare products, but I’ve finally treated myself to a few products and trying to use them daily now)
I’m starting to feel more positive lately and just saying yes to trying out everything!
- I’m starting to draw more and even paying to attend Life Drawing classes in London!
- I’m starting to work more and more days at work so its almost becoming full time! Yet I don’t let that stop me from also doing more things during the day before the day ends. I also really love what I do at work and the people I work with are also very amazing too.
- I work at a Maid Cafe part time being a maid. And I also have to upkeep a persona for my maid character as if she’s a real person!! I’m trying my best to improve with that as it requires a lot of socializing and acting (which I was never really good at lol).
- I’ve been saying yes to going out with my friends as much as possible and have gotten closer to many of my new friends over the past half a year!
- 5 friends came to my house and we all cooked dinner together (homemade spaghetti and sushi)!! It was so fun and we chatted all evening+night long.
- I went out for dinner with my partner’s family without him for the first time. I love that they call me their daughter and sister already lol. I shared a Nando’s platter with my father-in-law =D
I’m still trying to keep my hopes up and look forward to this year .. after the first 2 months of it had been so shitty!
I invited friends over my house yesterday and we all cooked dinner together!! It was so much fun and the spaghetti and sushi we made tasted great! Definitely a memorable night to always remember =)
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Eating @ Sakagura with friends last night was such a nice experience. All the food served was presented very nicely and tasted amazing - we mainly came just for the Wagyu and truffle ramen! And it didn't let us down. It was worth the wait and also the great company of these friends made the night worth it.
So grateful for all my new friends that I’ve made in the past half a year!!
Feasting with good friends :)
I often have been waking up saying I don’t like my job because I have to wake up at 5AM to get ready/go to work to start at 7AM. But by the end of the day, I do love my job, the people I work with are great, I love being able to work in Westfield shopping Centre as well, and I love seeing people happy with the job I do - Overall it is a very rewarding job =)
Oh god it feels so good to self harm again after almost 2 entire years clean. I can easily get addicted to this again for sure
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I really tried. Sorry.
I suppose it was kinda cool working here for the past 2 months and all my work mates were really nice and fun people, I'll miss this place as I learnt so much! Starting a new job tomorrow in Westfield Stratford City - I hope that everything I learnt will be useful and help me ease into my new job well.