Cactus

survival mechanism they don’t emphasize enough is memorizing a poem. you memorize a poem you have a little lift raft for a variety of situations

who is the first david you think of when you hear the name david

Musicals are time loops. Every night, the same thing happens except for a few minor differences. It always ends the same. If you want the characters to do something different or to make better choices, too bad. The actors are bound by the script and the score. The only way for the time loop to end is for the show to close. But you (the audience) don't want the show to close, nor do the actors who would like to be employed. It's a lose/lose situation. For the actors, audience, technicians, and for the characters, who are forever stuck in the same stretch of time.

it will never not be funny to me when german recipes ask me to use Öl. ah yes now add 2 tablespoons of KILL🔪🔪

“never kill yourself” is such a funny phrase to me that i think it’s accidently started working. its like an affrimation. say ‘never kill yourself’ enough times as a joke and maybe you won’t try to kill yourself over minor inconviences anymore

it’s good for you to look at things that make you lightheartedly say “ew” while snickering like a little kid and then carry on. i say this genuinely. it will shift your knee-jerk reaction towards things that mildly disgust you away from fear

Putting the term "Catholic guilt" on a high shelf where fandom can't reach it until everyone learns how to identify characters who are very very clearly coded as Protestant.

the ideal media diet for a child is books and music from at least fifty years ago so they are always out of touch with the references and allusions of their peer group

I think it's actually super fucked up of evolution to not figure out how to just immediately go to sleep by choice and then wake up after a pre-decided amount of time. like at exactly midnight I should be able to go "alright. I will now fall asleep and sleep for 9 hours" and then I should fall asleep immediately and wake up at 9 am, you know?

it’s such a basic part of the reality of disabled people as a whole but it’s STILL so hard to get ppl to understand that some people will simply die without 24/7 care. their care is not for comfort, it’s not for fun, it’s literally a matter of life and death. “if their care was taken away i’m sure they’d learn to suck it up like the rest of us!” – something ive heard time and time again. no they wouldn’t, they would die. they HAVE died. they continue to die as cuts are made to welfare and health. why is this so impossible for people to grasp.

if I had a trillion dollars I'd solve world hunger and then get a bunch of action figures and then buy me and my boyfriend a house and then give everything I didn't need to charity. why can't I have a trillion dollars. why apartheid scammer white supremacist cuckold and not me