HopeWorks

Anxiety is a burden. But having anxiety doesn’t make you a burden.

We all know that there are plenty of long-term things you can do to tend to good mental health; exercising regularly, eating well, taking your meds and going to therapy are all cornerstones of maintaining good mental health. But the point of this post is for when those have failed, and you’re in the midst of a severe depressive episode, and you’re finding it ridiculously hard to look after yourself.  

This is a MASTERLIST of tiny little things you can do to make yourself feel even 0.5% better when you’re lying in a pit of despair or you’re having a moment of brief inspiration for which the window of action is rapidly closing. These are not designed to ~cure you~ or make you feel on top of the world; they are coping mechanisms that will temporarily help you to stay alive. Enjoy.

Reminder: if you are feeling truly despairing or suicidal then there is a list of resources HERE - please check these out if you feel you need them.

Have a shower/bath - a lot of self care guides tell you to focus on the sensation of the water falling onto your skin and the smell of the soap in a meditative sense but for me it’s more “oh my god! I no longer smell the way I imagine Oscar the Grouch would! This is great!”.

Get some air - if going outside is too much, open a window.

Drink shitloads of water

Have a hot drink - this post has some ideas for what herbal teas to drink for certain problems. I don’t know if they work, but they are worth a try!

Stretch - list of basic stretching exercises here.

Do some deep breathing exercises - you can see some examples in this fantastic resource specifically for anxiety and some progressive relaxation stuff here. You can also combine this with something like The Quiet Place Project, which is a 90 second meditation/relaxation site.

Take your meds - seriously. Take your damn meds. Set an alarm on your phone to remind you to take your damn meds.

Do a few small, easy chores - open your curtains, take the bin out, make your bed, put shit in your laundry basket, whatever. Don’t feel bad if you can’t do it all at once because WHO CAN.

Tidy your immediate surroundings

Fill a bag full of rubbish - just one small bag full of garbage, old receipts, empty beer bottles, old clothes or anything else clogging up your space/mind

Smell something good - perfume, body lotion, incense, those fancy aromatherapy oils, garlic bread. Whatever.

Watch something - if you’re a fan of binge-watching TV shows go here for all your streaming needs. If you’re a film fan, this Tumblr reblogs movie masterposts, so you can find a film to stream.

FOOD - yeah, I know I keep banging on about food but it is so. important. Healthy food is all well and good but fuck it - if you want to order £30 worth of pizza and eat it alone in bed then fucking do it. If you do want to eat healthily (and cheaply), there’s a list of healthy and cheap recipes here.

Create a basic to do list - not a full list of complex or challenging tasks, more of a daily routine. Decide what you want to do each day (shower, eat breakfast, get dressed, take a walk) Don’t worry about the bar being set low and don’t worry if you don’t complete it.  There are comprehensive downloadable lists here, including medication trackers, nutrition trackers and goal setters. Print these out.

Move - guides to depression always tell you to exercise, which is all well and good when you’re stable. When you are not stable, you can barely move your head to look out of the window, let alone go for a fucking jog. So my advice would be: walk to the end of the road and back, or up and down your stairs a few times, or do 10 jumping jacks and then lie back down again. Something small and manageable that will make you feel slightly more energised but isn’t Sisyphean in its impossibility. You can even exercise lying down, although I’m not sure any of these really qualify as energising.

Listen to something  - This American Life and Radio 4 are your friend, and there are looaaads of ambient noise sites online. My favourites: SoundDrown (has waves, rain, birds and more), VirtualShower, RainyFM (has thunder/lightning sounds).

Talk to someone - This doesn’t have to be a deep or meaningful chat about the state of your MH or anything. I just mean a nice, laid-back chat with a friend, family member or someone online.

Make yourself look nice - I’m not talking a full face of make up here, just something small - wash your face, brush your hair, clean your teeth, spritz some perfume, paint your nails, whatever it is that makes you feel nice. You will probably not be up for doing DIY hair masks and shit, but if you do then there’s an amazing list here.

Get dressed - when I’m feeling horrible, this involves changing from my bedtime pyjamas into my daytime pyjamas. Even if it is as simple as that it can help.

Do a puzzle - this will probably not make you feel too much better. But what it will do is distract you, which is often invaluable when you want to self harm or are having suicidal thoughts.

Cuddle a pet - and if you can’t do that…

Look at cute animals - kitten live stream here. Puppies here and here.

Masturbate

Delete some emails or organise computer files

Meditate - free guided meditations here, or download an app like Headspace

These are all things that have worked for me personally, so if you have a problem with any of them (think they are counter-productive or even damaging) then feel free to let me know by sending me an ask or tweeting me @rey_z.

“She was wearing such a beautiful color, a sort of inky teal,” photographer Jessica Fulford-Dobson said of the Afghan girl with the carefully tied headscarf whose portrait she took last year. In November, the photograph won second place in the prestigious Taylor Wessing Photographic Portrait Prize, and the larger series, Skate Girls of Kabul, is now on view at London’s Saatchi Gallery.