mixed nuts

kitty can have a little bit of cigarette. as a treat

thinking about being the pissboy stoner of the friend group. the guy who can't handle his weed, and it results in humiliation. everyone giving each other knowing smiles and laughs as they light the joint for you. it starts to hit you, and every time you cough you have to press your legs together to hold it back. you barely notice as they pass the joint back to you after just one other person's turn, seeing if you'll catch on, but you mindlessly smoke what's given to you. you have a tendency to relax, maybe too much, but the high washes over your body again and again. you're caught in another thought before you notice it, a dripping against your thigh, the damp fabric brushing against you, and you jolt, wondering if the others noticed. you try to act natural, like you're not miles away and not about to piss yourself like a child in front of all of your friends. your mouth is dry, you drink more once you remember how to swallow, your bladder tensing. it works for a minute, until someone distracts you, or makes a joke you laugh just a bit too hard at. you try your hardest but you simply can't clench muscles hard enough through the daze. you lose control for seconds that feel far too long. someone in the distance laughs, pointing out the visible wet spot streaking down your leg. you fight as hard as you can but the work becomes tiresome, and all the tension in your muscles gives way to relief as you completely wet yourself. you relax in a daze. your friends take their time bullying you, whether you're really conscious enough to hear it or not. next time they have to make sure you're protected. they'll help diaper you next time before you smoke, sure you'll be humiliated but they'll teasingly remind you of last time. one of them just happens to have pictures of it. you just can't be trusted to control yourself when you're high. good thing a stupid fag like you has such good friends to take care of your messes.

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