If I wrote Scene 2 of Act 2 of Wicked...
I’ve wanted to do this ever since I saw Wicked for the first time as an adult back in 2019 and realized there was this odiously ableist scene. I was watching a bootleg with SJB the other day and had to stop watching because that scene upset me so much, so I wrote this instead (I do want to see Stephanie’s No Good Deed, though, I’ll probably double back). Act II is so incoherent, the scene could be changed to literally anything and it would be an improvement. I earnestly believe Winnie and Stephen should quietly replace that scene with more respectful material, because Wicked is going to run forever and disabled audiences deserve better. Here’s my attempt at the rewrite. I wrote it like a screenplay because sorry that’s all I know how to do, I’m a big dumb playwriting baby!
Lights up on a bedroom chamber. Nessa, dressed in ornate robes, addresses Boq, just as put-upon as ever.
BOQ
Nessa, you can’t keep letting the Animals into Munchkinland, the Munchkins don’t have enough as it is.
NESSAROSE
Since when did Munchkinland have closed borders?
BOQ
Since the Emerald City closed theirs.
NESSAROSE
I won’t hear this.
BOQ
Being a leader means making hard choices—
NESSAROSE
Boq! I won’t hear it.
NESSAROSE
I’ve asked you to call me Nessa, my love.
That stings. He bows and takes his leave. As he disappears, a light flicks above Nessa’s wardrobe:
ELPHABA
Well it seems the beautiful only get more beautiful…
She sees her sister illuminated from within the glass of her wardrobe mirror.
ELPHABA
While the green just get greener.
NESSAROSE
Oh, Elphaba, I’m so happy to see you!
Nessa rolls over to the wardrobe as Elphaba clambers out through the mirror. She takes her sister’s hands.
NESSAROSE
I was so worried— it can’t be true, what they’re saying about you, I know it—
ELPHABA
I don’t have much time, Nessa. I never thought I'd say this but I need father's help. I need him to stand with me.
NESSAROSE
Elphaba, that's impossible.
ELPHABA
No, no it's not. Not if you ask him. You know he'll listen to you, you just have to ask him—
NESSAROSE
Elphaba. Father's dead.
NESSAROSE
He's dead. I'm the governor. When he heard what you’d done… he… they said he died of the shame.
ELPHABA
Well good. I’m glad.
NESSAROSE
That’s a wicked thing to say.
ELPHABA
He wasn’t going to help me anyway. It was stupid to come.
NESSAROSE
He was our father.
An uncomfortable silence passes between them.
ELPHABA
I should be going.
NESSAROSE
I could stand with you. If you tell me what happened. I am the governor, it would mean something—
ELPHABA
No, Nessa, I can’t let you harbor a fugitive, I’ll only put you in danger.
NESSAROSE
Elphaba, you don’t need to protect me.
ELPHABA
I killed father, it’s the least I can do.
NESSAROSE
No! You’re just like him.
ALL OF MY LIFE, I’VE BEEN PUSHED THE SIDE
BY PEOPLE WHO TELL ME THEY CARE
ALL OF MY LIFE, I’VE BEEN SHELTERED IN PLACE
BECAUSE SOMEBODY ELSE WANTS ME THERE
ASKING STAND ON MY OWN FOR JUST ONCE
BUT ALL THEY CAN SEE IS THIS CHAIR
ELPHABA
Wait. I can… Nessa, I can fix this. I can do what I should’ve done long ago.
Elphaba takes out the Grimmerie and begins chanting.
ELPHABA
Ambulahn Dare Pahto Pahpoot
Nessa’s shoes begin to glow red.
NESSAROSE
Oh, ow— ow, it burns!
ELPHABA
Ambulahn Dasca Caldapess Lahfenahto Lahfenahtum
NESSAROSE
What is that? Ah! My shoes! It feels like... like they're on fire! What have you done to my shoes???
ELPHABA
Pede Pede Caldapess.
Nessa’s feet move from under her. She lifts her dress… revealing THE RUBY SLIPPERS.
Nessa stands, but falls. Elphaba goes to help her up—
NESSAROSE
No, don't help me.
ELPHABA
Oh, Nessa, at last...
I'VE DONE WHAT LONG AGO I SHOULD
AND FINALLY FROM THESE POWERS SOMETHING GOOD
FINALLY SOMETHING GOOD...
ELPHABA
I should be going.
She approaches the mirror and begins rifling through the Grimmerie, but Nessa SNATCHES it from her hands.
NESSAROSE
No, wait. Boq! Boq, come see!
ELPHABA
Nessa, nobody can know I'm here!
Elphaba tries to grab back the book. Nessa darts around, book held above her head, grinning at her new ability to evade her sister. She ducks behind a table just as Boq enters and sees Elphaba:
BOQ
What is it madaaAAAH! What are you doing here? You stay back!
He grabs a metal poker (or maybe it’s a gun? The bootleg I’m watching is low quality) and brandishes it at her.
ELPHABA
Boq, it's just me, I'm not going to hurt you!
NESSAROSE
It’s true. Boq, you can trust her—
He turns towards Nessa and sees: she’s standing. He drops the poker.
BOQ
(to Elphaba)
You… did this for her?
ELPHABA
For both of you. Nessa, I really need to go.
BOQ
Elphaba, this changes everything.
BOQ
UH NESSA, SURELY NOW I'LL MATTER LESS TO YOU
AND YOU WON'T MIND MY LEAVING HERE TONIGHT...
BOQ
Yes...
THAT BALL THAT'S BEING STAGED
ANNOUNCING GLINDA IS ENGAGED
TO FIYERO...
BOQ
YES NESSA THAT'S RIGHT!
AND I'VE GOT TO GO APPEAL TO HER
EXPRESS THE WAY I FEEL TO HER
Oh, Nessa, I’ve been in love with Glinda since before she dropped the “Ga.”
NESSAROSE
But I thought… I thought you loved me.
BOQ
I only did this for her. To prove my love, but... I need to go before it’s too late.
Nessa whips around towards Elphaba.
NESSAROSE
Did you do this?
ELPHABA
No, Nessa, I had no idea.
NESSAROSE
You asked her to do this to me.
ELPHABA
I didn’t, I swear.
NESSAROSE
You’re both just leaving me!
BOQ
Nessa, I lost my heart to Glinda from the moment I first saw her.
NESSAROSE
Lost your heart? Well, we'll see about that...
ELPHABA
Nessa, what are you doing?
Ness flips through the Grimmerie, squinting at the pages.
NESSAROSE
DID YOU THINK I'D LET YOU LEAVE ME HERE FLAT?
BOQ
Don't come any closer!
NESSAROSE
YOU'RE GOING TO LOSE YOUR HEART TO ME, I TELL YOU!
IF I HAVE TO... I HAVE TO...
(She finds the page she’s looking for…)
MAGIC SPELL YOU...
ELPHABA
Nessa, let him go.
NESSAROSE
Ah... Tum... Tah... Tae...
ELPHABA
Stop, Nessa, it’s dangerous.
ELPHABA
You're pronouncing the words all wrong! That’s enough!
Elphaba wrestles the Grimmerie away from her…
But Boq clutches his chest and staggers back.
NESSAROSE
Boq! What is it?
BOQ
My heart feels like it's... shrinking.
NESSAROSE
Elphaba, do something!
ELPHABA
I can't! You can't reverse a spell once it's been cast!
NESSAROSE
So what do we do?
Boq stumbles into Nessa’s empty wheelchair and falls back. Elphaba rummages desperately through the Grimmerie while Nessa watches.
NESSAROSE
No, no, no. This is all your fault. If you hadn’t used that book in the first place—
ELPHABA
Nessa, please, I have to find another spell... it's the only thing that might work.
Elphaba pulls the wheelchair towards the wardrobe and starts casting another spell.
NESSAROSE
Save him, please!
THEY PROTECTED THE BURDEN BUT LEAVE ME HERE HURTING
THE PRICE I PAY FOR COMPANY’S INCREASED
I WON’T BE ALONE AND LOVELESS HERE
JUST THE GIRL IN THE MIRROR
JUST HER AND ME! THE WICKED WITCH OF THE EAST!
WE DESERVE EACH OTHER...
Elphaba comes out from behind the chair.
NESSAROSE
Well... what about his heart?
ELPHABA
It's all right. He won't need one now.
NESSAROSE
Will he… love me?
NESSAROSE
You’ve taken everything from me. Boq. Father. I bet you embarrassed him on purpose.
NESSAROSE
You pretend to care about Animals, about father, about me. You don’t care about anyone but yourself, I bet you’re just going back to the Emerald City to find Fiyero and take him from Glinda—
ELPHABA
Nessa! Please. I have done everything I could for you… it has never been enough, and it never will be. But what happened to those monkeys is my fault. I have to set them free.
NESSAROSE
Wait, Elphaba. Please don’t go.
She leaves. Nessa crumples just as Boq stirs.
BOQ
Where am I? What happened?
NESSAROSE
Nothing, Boq, you just fell asleep... and...
As he rises from the wheelchair, Nessa sees…
He’s made of tin. She yelps.
BOQ
What is it, what's wrong?
NESSAROSE
Boq, it wasn't me it was her! I— I tried to stop her, but—
Boy sees himself and SCREAMS.
NESSAROSE
Boq, please, I still— It was Elphaba! Boq! It was Elphaba!!!
He runs off, leaving her alone…