the internet seems like a distant dream

whatever we are on rn is not the internet. It's ads

If we were tectonic plates would you grind against me be honest

[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

guards! read me my bedtime yaoi

my liege if you keep having all of the guards come to your bedroom to read you bedtime stories, there will be no one to actually guard the castle during that time!

any intruders are welcome to join us for story time

my liege the enemies to lovers yaoi is affecting your perception of the danger of real enemies.

when will it be my turn.

holy fuck

happy one year to bedtime yaoi

#if someone shouted something racialized at a food service worker and he pulled swords#if be like ‘yeah that’s fair’

in 2026 i am wishing for all of us the energy of bilbo baggins, who was headhunted for an extremely well paid role he had no qualifications or experience for, blagged the interview, and within his first week found a magic ring that does the job for him