You never loved me for a minute.

When I read the lies you tell and the manipulation that’s how you get a reaction out of me and that’s still giving you my energy. Never again. You’re a horrible person, the things you’ve done, the things you’ve said, and you have the audacity to text me for a hug? That’s over the top bizarre to me. No matter how badly my mind tricks me into wanting that Bc that’s all I wanted for so long, you’ll never have that privilege again. You’ll never touch me again. I don’t read what you say anymore because you’ve caused enough damage to my heart, my mind, and my soul. Without feeling any guilt is the crazy part.💔 Everything was left on very bad terms because of your immature self and your evil actions. You deserve nothing from me. I will make sure that I never become weak or insecure enough ever again to believe that you ever loved me. The facts were there. Every week of every month it was something to hurt me, degrade me, disrespect me. Made promises you could never keep no matter how big or small. Were much better at hurting me and mistreating me than anything close to the way I need to be loved. You failed me. And at the end, still make up an entire fake story in order to make yourself seem the victim. Same old song. So so so old. Wish I stopped listening to it a long time ago. You never deserved me. I know I was so blind, trying to win your love. Fuck that. I know you’re not hurting, you’re just upset you lost the best thing that’s ever happened to you. Take care. You told me to not speak to you ever again so that’s I’m going to do. You’ve ruined me and my life enough, just please leave me alone .

God knows the things you did to me…💔. It wasn’t you, it was me, foolishly in love with a selfish person, who never cared about me. Who made everything, every minute of the relationship, about her. An unaware, extreme narcissist. I wish I knew what you were capable of before. I wish you truly loved me enough, well you didn’t love me at all I realized now, at least cared for me enough, to let me go a long time ago, when I knew you’d never stop hurting me. It was me, who believed lies, who trusted empty promises, who gave too many chances. Nobody will ever know the things you put me through, just you. but in my heart that I gave to you that you shattered too many times it knows, my mind that cannot grasp how you could hurt me for so long, regardless of the love and care and passion and everything I gave, it knows. It doesn’t stop missing the illusion of what I thought could be true, but my vision is finally clear enough to see it was all a pipe dream. and God knows. He will take care of me. I will take care of me. Why’s it so hard for me still, to accept that you are an extremely narcissistic person, which means you are no good. Why’s is still so hard for me to hate you? Why’s it still so hard for me to even think of doing anything that would hurt you, no matter how much you have intentionally hurt me. I know why. Because my love is real. Because my soul is pure. No matter what happens to me 💔And I don’t need to say anything else about it. You know what it was. Narcissists just lie, blameshift, can’t take criticism, never take accountability. I’ve learned so much…. I left the keys. I saw everything was left on. I understand now. I should’ve understood the first time you hurt me, the first time you disrespected me, the first time you ruined me. You had to break me, ruin my life, the whole time that I gave you my love. And finally when I force myself not to, you still do everything you can to ruin my life and break me. I’ve never been so hurt, so depressed, so sad, so betrayed, so shocked, so angry with myself, so fucking heartbroken in my entire life. I loved you more than the clouds rained. I loved you more than the sun loved to rise in the East. I loved you more than anything in my life. You fooled me. I thought you were the one. I loved you like you were my baby. I loved you like you put the beautiful stars in the night sky. I loved you more than I ever thought I could love. How could you have done all the things you’ve done to me💔 how could you have said all the things you’ve said to me💔 I did Eveyrthing I could to be yours, I did everything I could to keep you, to show you that I love you, to earn your trust, to earn your love, to earn your affection. Nothing I did was enough. Nothing I did mattered. Nothing. I don’t hate myself for loving you, because you’re just a narcissist, and that’s why you will never claim that I was of any good in your life. But I know what my presence does, I know what my love does. It’s unforgettable. All I want to feel is regret, but that will only bring me down further. I don’t regret. I don’t regret being the only light in your world, I don’t regret being the only person who cared for you. I don’t regret holding you and putting you to sleep each night. I don’t regret waiting to see you with a smile on my face excited and ready to make sure you know you’re everything I ever wanted. I don’t regret giving you my love, I don’t regret showing you what true unconditional love is like. I don’t regret showing you how someone should care for you. I don’t regret it. Regardless of your lies, your manipulation, I believed in myself, I kept my promises, I trusted my heart with you, and I gave you everything. I know myself, I know what I gave, and I know what was given in return. I know how good I was. I know how honest I was. I know how real I was. I will never forgive your words, your actions, your lies. I will never forgive you. But I will work on forgiving myself, for continuing to cherish someone I knew never knew my worth. Never loved me. Never cared about my well being. Never appreciated me.

I knew you never cared about me. I’m going to disappear from your life. Good…. Bye 💔.

I just wanna be held