the quiet acceptance that no matter what , ones body will always betray him. to surrender himself. the weight of resignation. how unimportant are ones efforts? to find perfection in unorthodox ways. to become more.
indie, private, and highly selective interpretation of 𝚅𝙸𝙺𝚃𝙾𝚁 with intermingling variants from Arcane && League of Legends.
can also be found at @wandrare (league of legends multimuse)!
UNDER HIATUS UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE
note. with moving and the climate of the world, i just dont have the energy to be writing. SECONDLY, ive lost access to my ability to do graphic/carrd commissions! i may pop in here and there, but im always available on discord! just ask for it.
I am very liberal with unfollowing and soft blocking. I believe in curating a space I enjoy. I also think you should be the same way. If at all , during following or even if you don't and just don't feel like seeing me , I always encourage soft blocking me. This way I can refrain from reaching out/bothering someone that is no longer interested. There is no hard feelings here.
ACTIVITY
i am so very slow. i work full time and i run one other blog. so my activity will be low to sporadic. that being said , i do not mind nor care how many threads/asks we have. i love having a variety. the only thing i ask is that replies have some substance behind them so i can reply!
GENERAL
my muse fluctuates from time to time and will sometimes be non - existent. with this being said , please have some decorum when it comes to when my replies my come out. i do practice MAINS/AFFILIATES/PRIMARIES and they do make up the majority of my blog. EXCLUSIVES are also in play as I do not often see myself interacting with multiples of the same muse , especially if i have one as a primary/affiliate.
ETIQUETTE
basic tumblr etiquette needs to be in place. dont rb headcanons, threads that are with other people, etc. dont take my graphics/HCs as they will be modified to my version of Viktor . DNI if you are under the legal age , are -phobic of any kind , sexist or racist , or a pro - shipper. pls do not drag your drama here.
CONTENT
Triggering content should be tagged accordingly. I always use CONTENT tw / when I tag things , no matter if its in writing or photo form. When it comes to any sort of NSFW content that is written , it will be placed under a readmore and will only be written with people I am comfortable with. do not come to me looking for just smut/nsfw stuff. i am not the person for that.
SHIPPING
i am ship EXCLUSIVE across all blogs and muses with SHEPARD and his jayce is considered my viktors primary partner. with this being said, i am no longer open for shipping at this time. things may change as certain interactions progress naturally, but for now, that will not be the case.
I am open to all other sort of dynamics from the bad to the good! please do not let this dissuade you from interacting!
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i think about starting over. leaving this blog until its pair comes back, writing a single muse in a simple format with nothing fancy with the ppl i enjoy writing with in my life.
yea we probably saw this coming with my inactivity. but, to make it official, yaboi just doesnt have the energy anymore. with the way the world is rn, with what im going through with life, i just cannot bother with tumblr atm. i may come back, i may not, i have no idea! im sure, in the future, i may return at some point, but there is no telling of a when.
GRAPHIC/CARRD COMMS: i had lost my ability to do graphic comms some months back. my pc just WONT let me use my websites/programs atm and i cannot figure out why. ive been trying to fix it, understand what is happening, nothing it working. for carrds, i just cannot afford to reup my carrd sub atm.
my discord is always available!!! just ask for it:) i sometimes write on there, but its like ............. very very rare.
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❛❛ The very fact that we both have changed is exactly why it's as if I don't know you anymore. I don't know this version of you, just like neither of us knows this version of me. ❜❜ That's what all of this is at its core isn't it? The nonrecognition of the self — the abject horror of looking in the mirror and not knowing who it is that looks back. The terror of depersonalization, of derealization.
❛❛ How well can we know ourselves and each other when we don't even know to what extent the claws of hell have gripped our souls? ❜❜ Jayce speaks firmly, uncoddling, but not cruel. ❛❛ I'm all for tryin' to figure this shit out, but I won't play pretend like nothin's changed. You rewrote us through that deal you made. ❜❜
A sigh falls from him. Adjusting his hat and wiping his brow, Jayce looks up from beneath his brim. ❛❛ But I am glad to hear that you ain't goin' anywhere. 'Cause neither am I. ❜❜
Viktor finds himself in slightly stumped, chewing on his bottom lip as Jayce speaks. he knows Jayce is right. of course, Jayce was right. it was Viktors own selfish deal that put them in this mess, even discussing this. he pinches the space between his eyes with his fingers, still gnawing away at that lip of his.
❝ i still do not agree that things have changed so much. ❞ is a soft muttering of words, not fully meant for Jayce to hear, but spoken aloud nonetheless. no, Viktor was stubborn enough to believe that they were still them, even if the passage of time and even Viktors ‘mishaps’ had altered the way it may be viewed in present standing.
but, as Jayce finishes off does eyes finally reture to the other. there is a sort of hopefulness in his sights before he squashes it away and turns away fully, back facing Jayce, tinkering with some random paper as if he is reading it. ❝ then all we need to do is learn again. ❞ he states in a rather matter-of-fact tone, though his fingers are pinching the paper he held tightly, irritated. ❝ us, each other, it is not as if what changed has taken away our ability to do that much. ❞
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testing some things since ive been wanted to go back into my semi horror-esque type of edits. trying to blend pretty with unsettling but man, its a whole new ball field. i like this though. not sure what to use it for.
EX of other stuff ive done in the similar vein below.
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rant below, not pertaining to anything tumblr wise but for some commissions ive done outside out tumblr -
im .... getting exhausted? i dont advertise myself as anything amazing. my stylization is obvious with all the work i do and yea, im willing to try other things, but im literally an amateur. i do this for fun half the time.
and, in truth, i know what i do isnt the best nor really anything 'amazing' compared to other people. thats why i dont charge much of anything. its mostly just for the time i put into the work. and on top of that, doing all this work while mentally drained, i know that isnt an excuse but i genuinely havent been feeling it much at all lately.
i have good look getting customers here on tumblr. i do feel like the tumblr folk are a lot more forgiving when it comes to certain things.
but i tried extending my wings into other sites, doing more lowkey stuff that isnt super out there, while explaining it isnt my forte but i was willing to try it cause i need to make more money. and it just feels like im being laughed at.
i started doing these commissions on a whim cause i couldnt afford nicer things. and thought "i wanna do this for people that also cant afford the super nicer things". which is why i still do commissions that arent carrds (as, in truth, i think im better at all around than graphics).
so to past and future customers, i am sorry? im trying to learn new things every time i do this for yall. and it doesnt always execute well. im just tired. i want to be better at this for myself and others cause i wanna continue giving work that makes ppl happy and looks good without cutting into pockets.
but right now, i just dont feel like im living up to par even to myself.
atm, my carrd subscription is down so i am UNABLE to make carrds. if you are interested in graphics, i can still do those until i get my carrd re-upped. ill have it fixed soon!
