ehhhh...

He feels "protected", "invincible", "welcomed", "needed", "loved".

"parasite in chief in her idiot hat" still makes me fucking cry laughing

like to save the austrailians, reblog to let them be crushed by pluto

let us die

i did a deep clean of the kitchen and living room in this house i live in with six theatre people for the first time today and i prepared myself to find a lot of weird shit while cleaning - like the fake bloody foot in the coat closet - but nothing prepared me for the corn-shaped dildo under the couch

there is Corn Dildo Lore in this household, i just can’t remember the details. i believe it belongs to a roommate who is currently out of state. i do not know if it has ever been used in a sexual way, but i have touched it now, so i sincerely hope it is more of a novelty item

The corn dildo was a birthday present indented to continue the tradition of getting me absolutely horrendous dildos. There’s a glass blown tentacle dildo hidden somewhere in the house that started the tradition. Niether have ever been used as intended (as far as I know)

there’s a what where

do you guys like. talk irl or

man for real in 2021 we're dismantling the idea of the Child Prodigy

this isn't abt like. Kids who decide to pick up guitar or drawing or whatever and have a talent for it this is abt the culture that allows parents to push their children to work at a skill at the expense of their childhood. like dance moms is a pretty good comparison here it's all abt parents who see their children as means to an end instead of independent, developing humans. yes it's impressive when an 8 year old can play some wildly intricate violin concerto but a 8 year old should not be putting in the kind of hours to make that possible ykwim

ur like.. the habit that i can’t break dude. aha,, ur the feeling i can’t put down. ur the shiver that i can’t shake, bro.

Y’all listen to me you have to fucking vote and you have to vote for Biden and you have to volunteer for biden and you have to get out voters in swing states bc if the election is contested in any way and it goes to the Supreme Court we will lose

I’m a little bit obsessed with makeover/dressing scenes where the reveal is an undeniable downgrade from what the character started out with. Top tier comedy

your man doesn’t have the mental strength to caramelize onions 

your man thinks it takes 5-10 minutes to caramelize onions

do you think caramelizing onions is putting caramel on onions

just once in my life i wanna get up in the morning without going through the full seven stages of grief first

What are the extra two?

Denial 2 and Astral Projection