where your focus goes, energy flows 🧿♡🧿

i was rushed sa ER nitong madaling araw, i am happily minding my own business then suddenly I can’t breathe, felt like my body and my world is collapsing, it felt like my body is giving up, i was crying non-stop, di naman ako nag pass out. so yes, tama kayo, it’s a panic attack accompanied by severe dehydration and gastroenteritis. longest 5hours of my life because I am playing worst case scenarios sa utak ko, kasi I am still rendering, and then I am down to my last 3 days and I am putting all the blame and burden sakin kasi pano sila but then again, it’s their fault kasi walang silang continuity plan. mag wowork pa sana ako today until Monday but my mom decided to email our HR na I can’t go to work anymore and to kindly don’t message me sa teams and communicate thru her instead sa email, para di ako ma stress and if needed calculate my unpaid leave kasi I have to pay notice period pa plus this unpaid leave.

do you ever think mag aaway kayo ni chesca over 1 guy?

do you ever trashtalk your exes? online? how do you deal with seeing them online?

magkagalet po ba kayo ni ate ches at ate gin? hindi ka kasama sa trips ni ate ches and di na kayo nagpunta sa pampanga

ang daming nangyari, I moved in to one of our apartments, I am in therapy, I enrolled to a boxing class, I enrolled sa isang online course (which is very technical) & I am following a personal curriculum as a hobby, halos patapos na yung 1st quarter goal ko. I am down to my 5 articles to consume and reflect on. I need an extra week to choose my next subject for the next quarter, feeling ko above na ko sa old self ko 😆 & surprisingly, ang dami ko palang time.

ever since, I envy people who takes time to curate their lives, their social media feed, people who takes time to decide on something, kasi ever since, I just go with whatever I think is the best choice for me at the moment, while it have more cons than pros, may nag click lang sa utak ko when a friend mentioned na hindi daw niya ma gets yung theme ng ig feed ko, when that's exactly my intention. kaya siguro ever since may pagka messy ako when it comes to my creation, kasi, yun talaga yun intention ko, kasi I don't want to be tied to a specific theme, I am not just a person who loves to read, or who loves to go to places, who is a daughter, a friend or a girlfriend, I want people to know that I am a lot of things, I am interested in a lot of things, I am open to do a lot of experiences, that my life isn't curated, I am not polished, I am not classy (in societies standard). Part din siguro ng pagiging rebellious ko as a person, ayokong binobox ako sa isang identity.