Diamond Dust

1st Doc

2nd Doc

Know Thyself. Three voyagers travel to an island in hopes of obtaining their fulfillment of wanderlust, only to have the turmoils of inner trials befall them in their dreams. Each person has their own story, as they seek a way out while they learn about the fallacies of themselves.

@gun-nun | @violinsnotheanswer | @heartofshale

.: ♫ — Of course, of course. He had seen through it- but it wasn’t hard to see through at all. She wasn’t even trying to lie. She turned away from him as he bluntly told her she was lying. As if she was denying this fact– not wanting to hear any of it.

If you are troubled, then accept it. You are only human. 

How could she, if that meant troubling others? First her loved friends and family, next… total strangers? She was slacking. No, she was breaking. Masks were breaking, and she was desperately trying to keep it together. Why would she accept something like that?

Pushing your feelings aside will only make matters worse. 

Time and time again, she had been told this. But she had survived so far. A long twenty-one years of it, struggling to keep it together, but… Even if she tried to say “don’t fix what isn’t broken,” well, this is broken.

“So… What should I do?” she asked quietly, still not looking at him. Another reminder of what she hid deep down. Just like him.

Oh, I wouldn’t know. I do not hold all the answers to each question the world has to ask. But if you were to ask me, from one stranger to another. . . 

“You live.”

Silence. The wind blows, plants swaying in the breeze. Crickets creek, and stray fireflies dance.

“You live and live and live and keep moving forward, as you ought to not let your weights chain you down. Define you. Otherwise you’ll be going nowhere.”

Easier said than done, that, for a man who held so much guilt it nearly suffocates him. Crushes his very soul. Then he pondered, just what troubled the young woman’s mind. Of course he would have no idea to what it would be like to be in her shoes, or in her life- but all pain is relative.

We all suffer the same, in a way.

“Pain fades away...does it not? It’s only the person who decides to hold on to it on their on.”

Each person goes through their own trials and tribulations, their very own tale. In the many stories he heard, and the people he had met in his lifetime-- Lloyd knew no two people were exact. This wasn’t a contest of who had suffered the most or the least, who held out the biggest trophy of their badges of turmoil and anguish- as it was all the same in the end. We all suffer the same, in a way.

“Just be...kind to yourself. If you cannot manage to do so, then you shall spend your days wandering around aimlessly in life as a husk until your body turns into dust.”

Almost immediately after it had been suggested, Nadi did so, baring the man’s arm with a tug of his sleeve. It wasn’t his knowledge of the scar that convinced him, however, but the tattoos beneath it, although the sight made him wince. The ink it marred he had seen many times, either while bathing or in the privacy of their own little hovel– but this was new, and ‘jagged’ was the wrong word for it. 

Shallow, intricate, a symbol or sigil he had never seen anything like in all of his travels… On the other hand, he did know a cauterized wound when he saw one.

Who the hell had done this to him?

He was startled by the other’s– his own– voice coming from so close, and jerked the sleeve down, feeling strangely guilty for staring so intently. He pulled his gaze instead beyond the crystal, to what Lloyd saw reflected back at him: a healthy young man in the prime of his life, albeit in need of some sleep, and then to what his own held for him. Dark eyes, hollow cheeks. A man only a year or so older, but appearing as though he had lived lifetimes more. He reached, without thought, to touch the face in the reflection, but withdrew his hand abruptly before his fingers grazed his cheek.

What the hell had happened to him?

<I… learned a trade. And traveled, too.> Nadi answered, somewhat dazedly, running them distractedly through his dark hair, instead. The words went unspoken, but as many things always had between the two, they also went without saying: I’m sorry I missed you.

<I uh, do landscaping now. Working on a farm in Arcadia, ‘til I feel like heading somewhere else.>

Possession by a malevolent spirit was almost more believable than running into someone he hadn’t seen in over ten years on the other side of the world– much less, switching bodies with them, somehow– but was he really in such shock he could do nothing but make small talk…?

<‘Margaret’… ever heard of it?>

As he heard himself spoke, Lloyd closed his eyes to listen to Nadi’s sayings. It’s been quite the time since he had last seen their face, or known what came of them. Although, it was nice to know that their friend had been able to see the world and make something of himself somehow.  <Is that so?>  I wonder whenever you’re finished, where do you wish to go. What are you looking for? Or are you now wandering aimlessly as I am?

His eyes snapped open by the name of the farm. The man only knew one person whom own a chateau such as that. “Margaret.”  <So you’re familiar with Miss ‘Elise’ are you not?....Wow, this world is much smaller than I’ve thought.>

“R-really? You’re willing to mark it down that much?”

That was exceptionally kind of the man…. Lest couldn’t help but be surprised. He was just going to ask to see cheaper wares, if he couldn’t afford anything. He wondered why the sudden change in price. Would Weiss have also acted this way? He wasn’t certain.

The more he tried to figure this person out, the more the man seemed to confuse him. He was certain of one thing, however- Whoever he was, Mr. Salamander wasn’t a bad person.

“In that case, I’ll buy it, thank you!” As he got his wallet out, and the man began talking about earrings, though, his smile faded a bit.

“U-Um…” one of Lest’s hands nervously went to his ear. “N-No thank you… That is, I don’t think there’s anything strange about having your ears pierced. It’s just that, um… Well, your earring reminds me of something, that’s all.”

He paused. “…If it’s all right with you, I’d like to tell you what that is a little later. But I have a question I want to ask you first. So um…”

“Mr. Salamander… would you like to be friends?”

“It’s not so much of a problem is it? Or if you need for it to be a tad bit more cheaper, I could knock off another 500g if you like.” Normally on most days, Lloyd wasn’t that generous when it came to wares- ( how else would one be able to make profits? ) but the earnest attitude of his customer really made the merchant think he ought to make an exception.  Who was he kidding, Lloyd was the giving sort in the first place.

Then again, it was his store- so he had the right to call the shots. Hopefully nobody would notice. He nodded. “Alright.” 

As Lest shown a level of discomfort about the earring again, the man decided maybe he needed to stop pressing over it. Perhaps he had seen someone in his life with a similar pair, perhaps he just really thought it was neat. Truth be told, even Lloyd was curious. Although that wasn’t in his place. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to- you don’t owe me anything-- but I’d love to hear the story about it.” He was a man for tales, after all. . . . . . . . .

“I-..” He stammered slightly, surprised and baffled by that question. Friends? Friends? How bold this Lest were, to ask such a question to a stranger. It. . .it vexed him, frankly so- Lloyd did not know how to respond to such a genuine suggestion.

Lloyd pressed on his lip deep in thought, trying to think of how to go about this in the first place. Well, it couldn’t hurt. Maybe this young man didn’t have much going for him at all. How...perplexing this was. Had Lloyd ever had someone ask to be friends? Perhaps not, but he did have friends. They just happened to happen on their own.

“You will be the death of me.”

Talk about impossible. There was no way in hell.

For the first time, Nadi looked down. At the robes this body wore, at the long, thin fingers of the hands he now controlled. Their pallid skin. They were older, covered in jewelry and scarred in places he didn’t remember, but… could he have once held them? At the market, so they didn’t get separated– in comfort his clumsy words couldn’t provide, white-knuckled, as they trembled from a nightmare?

<H-how do I know you’re not lying? Just… reading my memories…?>

<Tell me something only he would know. Something he never told me.>

If he was who he claimed, then Nadi had in fact known him like a brother, long ago– he would trust in his memory of The Boy from the Desert, his one true friend, and judge their legitimacy by it.

“Sometimes things aren’t meant to be understood. Often I wish I could make sense of the madness I have myself.” Much to his surprise, Lanna’s reaction was much different than he had anticipated- Revealing to him that the younger woman was more mature than she had let on. Generally he found her to be a tad bit childish, but in some instances...she was beyond her years, perhaps chasing after pipe dreams of reliving a shortened youth.

“Alive.” He repeats her words, softly under his tongue.. To be given such a gift, that doubled as a curse. To live, in all cases- was better than to not exist at all. Who was he to be of this plane though? When in all paths this man crossed had left people in their destruction and wake. He carried a guilt that lasted several lifetimes, and Lloyd wasn’t so sure if things could ever be repaired on his end. True, in other tales, there are stories of ones who clear way to make their own destiny, to salvage the pieces of their fractured mind, body, and soul. He found comfort in the people who lived and moved forward despite their shortcomings- and inspiration in the ones who always kept trying despite their anchors pulling them down. Lloyd knew he barely had an inch of an idea of Lanna’s tales in life, but the man surely had an hunch she suffered a lot more than she let on. So perhaps ...that was why the blonde was the way they were, how they acted like they were the best and most shining star around. How they wanted to become something, anything. When she was already, just that. As she were. Alive. He didn’t realize how much he would appreciate her kindness and sympathy. Lloyd knew his own existence was a weight, a man riddled with remorse and guilt- chasing stars all over universes until it all fades to the darkest black.

But to be called a friend though, genuinely-- meant something of the highest caliber from the young woman. How sweet of her to pay him in kind. A rising star emerges in the light, with a heart of gold. Who cares for the littlest of things, even if it doesn’t mean to be done so. Truly, Lanna Elliott was something else. And Lloyd hoped her chapters and walks in life only brought her happiness and fulfillment and joy. “......” Rendered speechless, he knew it was better to respond to her words of comfort at some point. And all the man could manage to say was a simple. “Thank you.”  “....I admit I might have to rest just a tad bit longer, otherwise I’d love to talk.” Lloyd knew his limits, he was already in the lull of a sleep, Lanna’s kindness a lullaby. In which Lloyd hoped to find a dream where he could desire to fully be alive one day. To allow himself the idea and thought, that he did make a difference, that he himself had more meaning to this world to begin with.

♕⋆˚｡⋆୨୧˚✧ — Oh, boy. She didn’t regret visiting him, but he really sounded like he needed some rest after this. She wasn’t even sure how his voice grew to be so raspy after a fight, seeing that she blanked out when Aurelia began to hit him relentlessly. 

She let out a breath of relief that he hadn’t, honestly. It was embarrassing to say the least, not something she was proud of. At his question of fun, she darts her gaze away from him for a second. 

“Well, you could say something like that.” She shrugged, recounting the battle. “Losing isn’t exactly my style.” Neither was crying in front of people. 

Lanna looked back to him and flashed him a bright smile. “But, thanks.” Now, if he could take his own advice, and keep trying, maybe he would think more of himself. 

“Hm… Well, even if you say so, it sounds like it to me. You’re just strong in a different way. You create mysteries, like a magician.” 

Lanna could hardly believe that he was fragile, but her mind flashes back to one of their first interactions at the dance and what he had told her. His next statement doesn’t bring much consolation either. She shifts a little to face him proper, even as he looks away from her. 

“Well, I really can’t promise anything, but I’ll…do my best.” She looked at him, a bit concerned. “It seems to be weighing heavily on your chest, so I’ll at least take that into consideration.”

“Then you shall do your best to win next time.” Lloyd replied in turn. He tilts his head slowly to the side, perplexed and touched at the same time by her words. At the end of the day, she was a kind person. Perhaps in a way, he could consider the songstress as a friend.  “....Thank you.” Truly, she had a heart of gold. Much like someone else he knew.

“All right...”  Lanna seemed calmer than normal, composed and refined even. So at the very least, Lloyd thought he could trust her enough to reveal an inch of himself, due to how very worn and weary he’s been all this time. And well, the pain was getting to his head, so this was a lapse of his mind.