Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History

His head tilted and he frowned, as she stepped away from him, out of his grip. Suddenly, he realized how cold it was, but he didn’t mind. The wind felt nice, proving to him that even the cold couldn’t rip him away from this paradise with her. She was all the warmth he needed.

Perhaps, he should get his coat if he didn’t want to fall ill though. Agreeing with the logic, he jogged over and grabbed his coat and put it on. He nodded at her comment. “Absolutely not. Being king would be bloody horrible, all busy, no play. How dreadful that’d be. Sorry for that fool.” He played along, grasping her hand and nodding towards the castle.

“Perhaps, we should head in? Unless you have other ideas? Any fantasies about the stables or gardens or anything out here?” He playfully wiggled his eyebrows at her.

Petra had to laugh, shaking her head as she heard what he had to say. “Typical! Naughty king. Better watch yourself or Father Christmas won’t give you any presents.” She teased lightly, forcing down her natural reaction of blushing and purring. At least it was nice to see him so... active after how long it had been since the treaty. “Though I might depending on whether or not I collapse from exhaustion on your bed when we arrive. You know how to wear me out.” 

An uncharacteristic wink she’d inherited from her time as Jinx was sent his way before she rested her head on his shoulder, chuckling softly at his question. “Maybe in the summertime, Ed. It’s far too cold for doing anything outside. Besides, I’m looking forward to a hot bath and a handsome king rubbing my shoulders, not a romp in the hay with more cricks in my shoulders or freezing in the end. Not to mention...what would Philip say?” she poked his chest, imagining her own mortification at the horse knowing exactly what was going on in the stables. 

...though why was she even allowing herself to think of this. Naughty Petra, indeed.  

...it was all Edmund’s fault. 

When Edmund had mentioned her need for more training, Petra had been unsure just who he had had in mind– though looking back she realized it was probably merely density on her behalf not to have foreseen who Edmund meant. She should have expected him to be the one wanting to train her, a fact which she could only sigh at herself for being surprised at… though frankly, as one who had never seen him fight, her hardest challenge was not getting distracted by constant amazement at him.

Now, out of breath, with the chilling air assisting in helping her cool down, she laughed lightly, straightening up with a light groan. “Well that was tiring. Educational, rewarding to my eyes…but damn tiring.” She announced, stepping closer to him and loosely looping her arms about his torso.

He smirked at her remark, wrapping his arms loosely around her waist. “My view wasn’t too bad either. Beautiful as usual,” he said softly.  “And, I may be slightly biased, but I think it was very satisfactory.” He returned the peck and rested his head against her forehead. Grinning, he winked. “Why, miss, you’re already my favorite pupil.” 

Laughing, he rolled his eyes at her sarcasm and stepped away from her a little, but not enough that he couldn’t keep his arms around her waist. He gazed down at her and sobered up, falling in line with her joke. He shrugged. “If you wish to continue as my pupil, you should know that I always prefer to stay away from schedules.” He nodded, with a smile breaking on his lips. “The universe is telling us-”

His jokes left him, as she reached up to her shoulder. He glanced between the spot she held and her eyes. A grin spread across his face at the image that flashed into his mind. Gently, he reached up and brushed his fingertips against the sore spot.

"Mmhmmm..." she hummed, nipping at his lips playfully as she caught his meaning. "Somehow I get the idea my shoulder wouldn't be the muscle you'd be focused on, my love. Though as your favorite pupil I'm sure I'd still be spoiled by it... still...very tempting..." She couldn't deny how lovely it sounded after all. "I might take you up on it. We'll see"

A King would want a competent Queen after all– or whatever she would be. She could only imagine how bad it might be, her behavior coming from anyone higher than a lady in waiting, or a librarian. An unacceptable disgrace, who would likely humiliate him in a moment of passionate feeling of injustice. Her face heated up, noticing how his face paled.

Oh no… he was going to realize this was a mistake, wasn’t he?

Her heart plummeted, and despite what she’d said a few moments before, she wished that she actually was more ‘normal’, that it would be a better thing for a queen. She wasn’t like Susan, with her wits and sense of politcs; or Lucy with her youthful wisdom. She was Petra, and it irked her that she was not one who could possibly live up to such a position he was willing to bestow upon her— for exactly fifteen seconds before he laughed, leaving her speechless on how to react. When he spoke, however, she began to ease, a small smile on her face as she shook her head, keeping her thoughts to herself as he started reassuring her.

Fingers going up tot he necklace around her neck, she felt the pendant under the tips, letting his words wash over her. Her eyes closed with a sigh, her shoulders sagging as she nodded, trying to agree with what he said. She was overthinking very likely, and it was already pulling her too far from what she should have been focusing on.

A younger version of herself was hitting her in the head, reminding her how she had once educated herself by borrowing books from the library. She could teach herself again in whatever she lacked, ask for help when she needed it. She laughed herself, opening her eyes to look at him again. “I’m sorry… you’re right, completely right. I trust you, I should have known you thought of it and…” She trailed off.

Leaning in, she rested her head on his shoulder. “It will be fine, it will all be fine, I’m just overthinking. I did the same when Susan asked me to be her lady.” It was half to him half to herself. “Though you’re right, I should probably work on the dagger thing.” Her head tilted to look up at him.  

She talked, but mostly to herself. Edmund could hear it being directed towards him outwardly, but knew that it was more for her to convince herself. Obviously, he needed no assurance to how this would go. He had full confidence in her, as his wife and a royal. There was nothing that would change his mind- well, there were some possibilities that would, but he had faith that those would never come about. Not with Petra. 

He rested his head against her’s, as she leaned it on his shoulder and smiled. She was rambling a little, as normally, and it brought another twinge of rightness to the occasion. He had missed her nervous thought processes, her rambling around her feelings. Recently, she had been more forward and direct and it was nice to return to such a moment. 

“Perhaps we can arrange you a special dagger throwing zone to help out, or maybe start you on proper weapon training.” That actually wasn’t a bad idea and would make him feel better, not that she couldn’t protect herself now. With Cillian still about, Edmund was worried about her. He knew that the Guild probably helped her with her training some, but he couldn’t remember exactly. This way would ensure for a fact that she’d be fine no matter what. 

“Yes, I know you’ve had sufficient training in the past, but training never ends, ou know? And we have plenty of training spaces. If you wanted to… It’d be a shame to let you’re talent with daggers to become rusty. You might need to use it one day.”

"Training will be good. But who will train me?" She asked him as she took his hand and stood, her other hand fishing in her pocket for the keys to the library. "I mean I could ask Eoghan or Padriac, I suppose, but I don't know if you had someone in mind. Padriac might be a little preoccupied with Eleanor and the children now... though thinking about it there are a few options I could go with."

Perhaps Susans guard Garrett could be of use, or Easlmus... she had forgotten momentarily the fact that she had options. Petra gave a little laugh at herself as she touched the necklace again. How could she forget her options? If he wanted her to be better trained she was sure she could find someone, as long as she didn't get too distracted by the events of the day and forget completely.

“Dull would be no good at all.” Edmund grinned, thinking about what it would be like without their quirks. Edmund’s overworking, Petra’s hotheadedness, their flirtatious dynamic. It was an odd combination, but combined perfectly to create who they were. In complete honesty, Petra was more unpredictable than Edmund in his mind. He worked, ruled, and had some fun, but she fought for what she believed in, which took her on passionate adventures such as in her past.

Edmund’s mind reeled in when he realized that she had froze. Furrowing his brows, he began thinking about what could be wrong. A million options came to mind: the necklace wasn’t right, she decided she wanted a ring, she was having second thoughts on saying yes.

His face paled at the final thought and he gulped, waiting anxiously for her to clue him in on what the matter was. There wasn’t supposed to be tension right now, but endless happiness. Had it been something he said?

Fright swallowed her face and the dreaded thought that she wasn’t ready ready to marry him came back. The reality had hit her at once. It was a punch in the gut.

Then, he laughed. It wasn’t at her or with her but about the situation. Clearly he had jumped to the worst case scenario and now the happiness came rushing back to his body. He leaned back and looked out at the scenery, bowed his head, and then looked back at her again.

“I’m not laughing at you, I promise.” He spoke between breaths in an attempt to sober up. “It’s just, when you froze, I thought you were going to go back on that yes you said and-” He shook his head, grinning. “This is just much better than what I had expected. Because you have nothing to worry about.”

Gently, he touched the necklace, marveling at how well it suited her. He had no doubt in his mind that this would exactly what he was meant to give her in this moment. It was much better than any ring could be; it was a symbol of them.

“If I doubted your capabilities at all, I would have never asked. In fact, I knew from the moment I met you that you have exactly what a royal should have.” He began. “You won’t be like the others, no, and dagger throwing would make things quite interestingly complicate, so perhaps we could work on that bit, but you’re passionate about what you believe in.You’re passionate about people. But mostly,” he place a hand gently on her chest. “You’re passionate about Narnia.”

He completely sobered by this point, with his eyes never leaving her’s. He took a breath. “What else is there that’s truly important because the rest of what you said, that’s all learned. I promise you, you’ll be great. I need you to trust me on this. I sort of know what I’m talking about.” He playfully smirked at the end.

Confusion was painted across her features for a few minutes as she saw his face as well, thinking perhaps he had realized what she said and was pondering the same lines. A line of thoughts which made her wonder if he was realizing it was a bad idea himself...

A King would want a competent Queen after all-- or whatever she would be. She could only imagine how bad it might be, her behavior coming from anyone higher than a lady in waiting, or a librarian. An unacceptable disgrace, who would likely humiliate him in a moment of passionate feeling of injustice. Her face heated up, noticing how his face paled.

Oh no... he was going to realize this was a mistake, wasn’t he?

Her heart plummeted, and despite what she’d said a few moments before, she wished that she actually was more ‘normal’, that it would be a better thing for a queen. She wasn’t like Susan, with her wits and sense of politcs; or Lucy with her youthful wisdom. She was Petra, and it irked her that she was not one who could possibly live up to such a position he was willing to bestow upon her--- for exactly fifteen seconds before he laughed, leaving her speechless on how to react. When he spoke, however, she began to ease, a small smile on her face as she shook her head, keeping her thoughts to herself as he started reassuring her.

Fingers going up tot he necklace around her neck, she felt the pendant under the tips, letting his words wash over her. Her eyes closed with a sigh, her shoulders sagging as she nodded, trying to agree with what he said. She was overthinking very likely, and it was already pulling her too far from what she should have been focusing on.

A younger version of herself was hitting her in the head, reminding her how she had once educated herself by borrowing books from the library. She could teach herself again in whatever she lacked, ask for help when she needed it. She laughed herself, opening her eyes to look at him again. “I’m sorry... you’re right, completely right. I trust you, I should have known you thought of it and...” She trailed off.

Being thrown back to their first real conversation, Petra considered how it was that somehow through the turns of events they’d managed to become what they’d wanted. She could recall his telling her how he needed someone who could understand his need of balance between love and work; and she needed someone who could respect her for her position and her mind.

Yet here they were, seeming years since that day by the creek where he’d informed her of Cillian having come back, the relationship having grown into something she never could have imagined. If only her fifteen year old self could see her now, the shock would have been amusing to say the least. The horror at saying yes to a man who she’d previously been so disappointed in…

But she wasn’t disappointed now. Even in his choice of an engagement gift was so uniquely him, so much something she had always wanted. Tradition came second to that which would mean more to them, as it seemed was their pattern.

Petra Pevensie. She liked the sound of it. As if that chapter she’d closed on her old life when leaving Susan was not only several pages back, but would never be returned to. She felt so different from then, from a lady trying to mimic her Queen to a woman being fully herself.

A woman who Edmund loved. It made her giddy. To think she’d nearly passed him up because of her guilt after that first night, her guilt toward Asture. A silly thing that would have been– a tragic thing.

With a nod to him as she smiled, she pulled her hair forward over one shoulder, baring her neck. “Could you, my love?” Her back slowly turning toward him so he would be able to put it around her neck without hindrance. “After all, that’s typically the practice, as I understand.” She threw over her shoulder with a giggle.

“It’d be my honor.” Edmund smiled back at her, watching her pull her hair over one shoulder. He could barely wait to see what it’d be like on her, how it would look from around her neck. He bet it would look perfect. 

Softly laughing, he began to place the necklace around her neck. He shook his head at her comment. “Typical tradition doesn’t seem to be our forte, I fear.” 

Thinking on it, this statement couldn’t be truer. They broke almost all traditions of a normal relationship, from co-workers in a sense to a night of benefits (which Edmund still felt ashamed for) to a secret not-relationship to a secret official relationship to finally a public relationship. Now, an engagement. They created their own rules as they went, with only each other. The outside world, unlike in the past, didn’t seem to matter between them. They were who they were. 

Plus, it could’ve been more estranged from typical traditions, as well. They didn’t cross certain boundaries that Susan had done. There was no pregnancies or secret weddings. In fact, out of all of Edmund’s relationships, Petra and his had been the least scandal-ful. Mainly, because Petra had set boundaries early on and Edmund couldn’t help but concede to them. She deserved to get everything that she had ever wanted. 

Their relationship was the perfect blend of typical traditions and their own, wrapped up to fit them. It was their’s, as unique and as normal as they had ever been. Edmund smiled at the thought as he clipped the necklace around her neck. 

Either way, she sighed with wide eyes, happy that neither one was the case. She was a hothead who got herself in trouble; and he was a man with a lot of baggage but was both incredibly interesting and attentive along with patient and understanding.

They had similarities and differences, like a whetstone to a knife, sharpening each other to a finer edge. They may not be star-crossed lovers, or speak in sonnets to each other-- but they had a deeper sense of what the other needed. And that, in and of itself, was not normal

The chain linked, and Petra smiled, beginning to turn when she heard his words--

Words which froze her veins for a moment as she looked at him in horror.

'Future majesty'

Petra was silent, much as she had been that first time they’d come out here all those months ago, allowing him to speak whatever was on his heart without interruption. Smiling inwardly for a moment at the fact that she had been right in her observation, she pushed all thoughts away in favor of total and complete attentiveness.

His beginning statement was interesting to her, and she blushed, her eyes averting for a moment before focusing back on him, her mind noting the way their hands fit like he said. She had made her own similar observations over the time they’d been together, how despite the fact that she had ‘loved’ before, she had never truly had the connection that she had with Edmund. There was something about how much they seemed to complement each other, moving as one unit through how they thought and spoke.

Had they had disagreements, yes, but somehow they’d always come back to them. Working it out and coming out stronger.

But she pulled herself from her thoughts once more as his tone changed slightly, trying her best to hide the smile which threatened to interject. A smile which was quickly changed into a look of curiosity, his words much more than she originally anticipated. It wasn’t as if he was about to tell her something small, there was a weight to his words, and she could sense it.

Her eyes darted to where his hand pulled something out of his pocket, her eyes widening when he knelt before her, her breath catching in her throat. She might have berated herself for thinking ahead, for hoping that maybe the cause of this whole thing was some kind of proposal, but she was too caught up in the red in his cheeks and the words on his lips.

I promise you a ring one day but for now, this is all I have…

A soft ‘ah’ escaped her, her wide eyes darting between him and the necklace in his hand. A smile could no longer be held back as he uttered his request the gravity of what he wished coming down like an avalanche:

Will you marry me?

Happy laughter from the tension building bubbled forth as she nodded. “Yes!” She exclaimed, her entire face filled with the emotions that she felt: happiness, surprise, adoration, love. “Yes yes, of course! I– yes…a thousand times, yes!” She leaned forward, pressing her lips to his own for lack of words pertaining to her exuberance.

She’d never understood how some women spoke so excitedly about the time when they were asked to be married– until this moment. She would be his forever, and that was most certainly enough to cause her to feel like shouting it from the rooftops.

Pulling away, she shook her head ever so slightly as she looked down at the gem. “I don’t need a ring…this is enough. More than enough. It’s perfect.”

Edmund grinned, as the anxiety that had plagued him vanished at the sound of her laughter. Pure happiness suited her well. Every part of her lit up from the emotion and he knew before the words came out of her mouth. Still, the sound of her promise to him was the best words that he had heard in a very long time. In fact, this moment was the best moment that he had been apart of in a long while. It surpassed any within his memories. 

Somehow in the makings of Narnia, outside of his siblings, he had found his own family, even when he swore that he never would. A week before meeting Petra as Jinx in that bar, Edmund was determined that love and marriage would never occur for him, that each relationship was probably doomed from the start. He didn’t balance work and relationships well, and tended to favor the first. That didn’t mean he didn’t value his relationships above all else, just that others never seemed to understand his method. It caused to arguments and fights and more pain than happiness. 

That all changed when he had met Petra for the first time. The first time that he saw her as who she was and not one of Susan’s Ladies in Waiting. She was a girl running from a burning past, running from the flames that were devouring her. Edmund only hoped that he’d be able to put out that fire which haunted her for the last time, for it to never burn her again.

If only he knew what the future behold.

He returned the kiss, with as much exuberance as her. Some times no words could fully voice the weight of the situation, the happiness of the situation, or the joy of the situation. A weight of relief filled him as she assured him that it was fine for there to be no ring, and he nodded, even though he was already planning to buy one in his head. She deserved the best there was, perhaps custom made. Edmund had the money to spare and Petra deserved to be spoiled. 

A beautiful ring, shiny but not flashy. Simple, yet complicated at the same time. Nothing too large or too elaborate, but something that captured her soul. Who she was. Who they were. 

Carefully, he unclasped the hook of the necklace and held out out towards her. He rose from the ground and slid on to the bench beside of her. His hands weren’t sweaty any longer. 

Yet here they were, seeming years since that day by the creek where he'd informed her of Cillian having come back, the relationship having grown into something she never could have imagined. If only her fifteen year old self could see her now, the shock would have been amusing to say the least. The horror at saying yes to a man who she'd previously been so disappointed in...

But she wasn't disappointed now. Even in his choice of an engagement gift was so uniquely him, so much something she had always wanted. Tradition came second to that which would mean more to them, as it seemed was their pattern.

Petra Pevensie. She liked the sound of it. As if that chapter she'd closed on her old life when leaving Susan was not only several pages back, but would never be returned to. She felt so different from then, from a lady trying to mimic her Queen to a woman being fully herself.

A woman who Edmund loved. It made her giddy. To think she'd nearly passed him up because of her guilt after that first night, her guilt toward Asture. A silly thing that would have been-- a tragic thing.

A laugh bubbled out of Petra at his joking, eyeing the shelf named ‘Henry’ with a smirk. “Well, Henry can only blame you know. You put me in this position…I can’t help and pulling out his books on a regular basis is part of my job description.” She played back, winking at him when he spoke of them forgiving her. “I’m happy to hear it. Who could hold a grudge against me? I’m so forgivable.”

He must be over tired, that was the explanation for his seeming excitement, it had to be. She gave a soft sigh as she half imagined they’d go out on the balcony and he’d fall asleep, and she was glad she left a blanket there earlier. She’d need it she had no doubt of.

Another kiss, which took her by surprise and pulled a hum out of her, though it was over too quickly, leaving her somewhat confused. It wasn’t that he didn’t kiss her often, it was the fact that she had a feeling that something was going on– especially when he said he didn’t plan. Her gaze leveled on him with more suspicion, apart from things thrown at him from outside sources. Edmund was a planner. It was how he worked. To say otherwise was a laughable idea.

But she said nothing, gathering data subtly now that she was keyed into something going on.

Led onto the balcony, she joined him per his request, turning her body to face him as a hand reached out to stroke through his hair. Whatever was going on, she wanted to help calm him, otherwise it was possible he might not tell her whatever was on his mind. “Yes it is a beautiful day. I was contemplating suggesting a walk before I planned in tucking you into bed.” She replied with a chuckle. “Which, I will inform you, I still intend to do.” Two days without rest insisted upon such a thing.

Looking out on the horizon, she hummed “it’s nice, though I cannot say ‘better’ that was a very nice night as I recall, and despite the concern of my situation I quite enjoyed it.” Turning back toward him, she examined his face… it was only a matter of waiting now.

“I promise that I will try to sleep in a little while.” He replied, knowing that he had no choice but to give in. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could stay awake. Fog weighed down his mind and gravity called down his eyelids. It took so much energy to collect himself, but the plan made itself easily the focus of his thoughts. 

She looked beautiful in the light of the sun. The golden rays bounced off her hair and it looked so glossy and smooth. He fought the urge run his hand through it. There would be time for such later, because right now, he needed to focus on the item in his pocket and how much he couldn’t wait spend every moment with her: the good, the bad, and the others. 

He grasped her hand gently, intertwining their fingers in a playful way. “I remember, the first time I held your hand, I couldn’t believe how well our fingers fit within each other.” He spoke softly. “It was so different than anyone else I had ever been with, like nothing was wrong. No little details that I had to overlook and convince myself would get better. It simply was better.”

He paused, using his free hand to finally run his fingers through a little bit of her hair as he brushed strains out of her face. “Because you were you.”

Suddenly, he turned back towards the scenery, but didn’t let her hand go. He sat in silence for a few moments, recalling the details of the wee hours of the morning. The fragile state that both of them were in, the stories shared for only the other to ever know. What that dawn brought to him. 

“I’ve been wanting to bring you out here for a while now. I kept thinking up ways that wouldn’t make this feel wrong, but kept it as it always is. You and me.” He began. There was no turning back now. Determination took control, waking him up from the fogginess of his mind. 

“I keep thinking back to that moment, especially in the light of everything that has happened, and one thing keeps cycling through my mind. In fact, it’s already broke into my conscious, leading me on a daily basis, and convincing every part of me that I never want to go back to how I was before.” 

His heart sped up again. He wondered if she could hear it, but didn’t mind that thought at all. She’d know how much this meant to him. How much she meant to him. And somehow, looking back at her again, he didn’t need her words to know that she felt the same way. He knew her. She knew him. Just like fire knew ice, and ice knew fire.

They could’ve torn each other a part, immediately aware of the other’s weakness, but they didn’t. They came together and became stronger. 

He adjusted his position to the side of the bench. He balanced carefully, not quite ready to plunge down yet. Soon though. The right timing would come. He turned towards her and kissed the back of her hand. 

“I wanted to bring you here because that night was the first and only time I’ve ever opened up about my version of the past. The first time I realized that I didn’t need to keep everything bottled inside, but that there was one other person in this world that understood. That would be there to warm me up when I felt frozen. That person is you Petra, and I never want to be without again.”

He took a breath, in small disbelief that this was happening. That he was going through with it. “Here is where you showed me that I wasn’t alone. And now, I never want to be alone again.”

He pulled a necklace gently out of his pocket. It had a silver chain that connected to a crystal that looked like a small gem of ice. Inside of it was a small fire gem, locked inside the ice gem. 

Finally, he knelt upon his knee, still holding a hold of her hand. He took a breath and held out the necklace. “I want you to know that forever, you’ll be the flame that continues defrosts my heart. Even in ice, I will never be cold again with you by my side.” 

His face flushed slightly, as the words and emotions came out easier than he had expected. He tripped over it a little, as he realized this wasn’t a ring- not protocol. But it felt much more them. He cleared his throat. 

“I know that this isn’t customs, but I saw this the other day at the shop and new I needed this for you. I promise you a ring one day but for now, this is all I have. I didn’t think this part all the way through actually.” He paused, looking up and locking eyes with Petra. A smile tugged at his lips. 

His beginning statement was interesting to her, and she blushed, her eyes averting for a moment before focusing back on him, her mind noting the way their hands fit like he said. She had made her own similar observations over the time they'd been together, how despite the fact that she had 'loved' before, she had never truly had the connection that she had with Edmund. There was something about how much they seemed to complement each other, moving as one unit through how they thought and spoke.

Had they had disagreements, yes, but somehow they'd always come back to them. Working it out and coming out stronger.

But she pulled herself from her thoughts once more as his tone changed slightly, trying her best to hide the smile which threatened to interject. A smile which was quickly changed into a look of curiosity, his words much more than she originally anticipated. It wasn't as if he was about to tell her something small, there was a weight to his words, and she could sense it.

Her eyes darted to where his hand pulled something out of his pocket, her eyes widening when he knelt before her, her breath catching in her throat. She might have berated herself for thinking ahead, for hoping that maybe the cause of this whole thing was some kind of proposal, but she was too caught up in the red in his cheeks and the words on his lips.

I promise you a ring one day but for now, this is all I have...

A soft 'ah' escaped her, her wide eyes darting between him and the necklace in his hand. A smile could no longer be held back as he uttered his request the gravity of what he wished coming down like an avalanche:

Will you marry me?

Happy laughter from the tension building bubbled forth as she nodded. "Yes!" She exclaimed, her entire face filled with the emotions that she felt: happiness, surprise, adoration, love. "Yes yes, of course! I-- yes...a thousand times, yes!" She leaned forward, pressing her lips to his own for lack of words pertaining to her exuberance.

She'd never understood how some women spoke so excitedly about the time when they were asked to be married-- until this moment. She would be his forever, and that was most certainly enough to cause her to feel like shouting it from the rooftops.

“Perhaps not…” Petra replied with a growing grin. “But you need me, admit it.” There was a lightness in the atmosphere again, and she nodded. “Never alone again, I promise.” She whispered, kissing him back with a soft enthusiasm, as if the words were still upon her lips and she wished him to know.

Perhaps it was an unspoken vow for her, for she knew that she would never abandon him as long as she breathed. She loved him too dearly, that any life without him was something she would grow to despair of, the place he’d made in her very being irreplaceable.

Laughing softly, she allowed him to lead her toward the balcony, a brow lifted in query as she wondered where this new spurt of energy seemed to come from in him. Combined with the question of– “Have I indeed?” Which came following his words, the fact he was walking backwards just for her beginning to make her curious. “Though I’ll only go out if you join me…you know before you came in I actually was considering dragging you outside for fresh air. What a mind we seem to share on healthy practices concerning the outdoors.”

Though she didn’t say it, she found him to be very cute, a sultry smoulder coming to her eyes in reply to his wink. “Just what do you have planned, Edmund? If there is anything.”

“Oh, very much so. These shelves were just telling me about how annoyed they are that you’re always around. Mind you, shelves have private lives that they wish for no company for, too.” He joked, using his free hand to point out the many books shelves. 

He pointed to one across the room specifically. “Why, that one, yes Henry, was saying that you keep prodding them with books and then yanking more out of them again. Very gruesome, may I add.” He laughed. He looked behind to see where the door was, then back at her again. Placing his hand on the door to the balcony, he leaned in close to her and added, “Don’t worry, love, they all forgive you.”

He stood in front of the door for a moment and just stared at her. He could tell she was getting curious, there was a sparkle to her warm eyes. They lit up. “For your information, I will gladly follow you any where you’d fancy.” 

He kissed her again, unsure where the urges kept coming from but he craved the taste of her lips against his. This one like the last wasn’t long, though slightly deeper and more aggressive. He wanted her, as usual, and he forced himself away.

The inner workings of his exhausted mind almost spilled out, but he rubbed them off on his pants leg again. Aslan, his hands hand never been so sweaty before. 

Or has his heart began racing so quickly. Each beat echoed in his ear drums, growing louder per beat. It was anticipating what was to come, eagerly waiting for her answer to the question he hadn’t even asked. It took everything within him to play dumb to her accusation. 

“You should know me I never plan anything.” Edmund told her. And you should know that very line is a lie. He opened the door and grinned as he looked out at the balcony.

Unlike the last time, the sun shined low in the western sky, but it wasn’t quite dusk. Afternoon was more like it. It beat down upon them like a golden orb guiding them to the future. 

He lead her towards the bench that they had sat upon all those months ago, when the night terrors brought frozen winters upon him. How she was a fire that warmed him up, when no one else could. She broke through. He was forever in her debt. 

Plopping down on the bench, he patted the spot beside of him and leaned back. Breathing in deeply, he sighed in content. “Nice day, isn’t it?” He began. 

The nerves flooded back into him, his heart leaping in his chest, and for the first time Edmund wiped his hand on his jacket’s front pocket. It rubbed over something hard, not large or too small. Funny how he had had it in his pocket for weeks now, working out perfect details and grand gestures, only to realize that all he needed was to stay up for 48 hours and to visit Petra. The rest would work out perfectly, such as the location he knew that it had to be. 

Right here and right now. Who cared if the small details weren’t figured out yet? Edmund could improvise quite efficiently. 

He must be over tired, that was the explanation for his seeming excitement, it had to be. She gave a soft sigh as she half imagined they'd go out on the balcony and he'd fall asleep, and she was glad she left a blanket there earlier. She'd need it she had no doubt of.

Another kiss, which took her by surprise and pulled a hum out of her, though it was over too quickly, leaving her somewhat confused. It wasn't that he didn't kiss her often, it was the fact that she had a feeling that something was going on-- especially when he said he didn't plan. Her gaze leveled on him with more suspicion, apart from things thrown at him from outside sources. Edmund was a planner. It was how he worked. To say otherwise was a laughable idea.

But she said nothing, gathering data subtly now that she was keyed into something going on.

Led onto the balcony, she joined him per his request, turning her body to face him as a hand reached out to stroke through his hair. Whatever was going on, she wanted to help calm him, otherwise it was possible he might not tell her whatever was on his mind. "Yes it is a beautiful day. I was contemplating suggesting a walk before I planned in tucking you into bed." She replied with a chuckle. "Which, I will inform you, I still intend to do." Two days without rest insisted upon such a thing.

Brown eyes caught the exhaustion before he even settled against the shelf, and Petra knew that as soon as he was relaxed enough she would be packing him off to bed where he could rest… whether he liked it or not.

Still, she didn’t ignore his words, allowing him to pull her closely as she recognized somewhere in him he needed her in his arms. But this hug was more for his comfort than hers, and wrapping her own arms around him, she tried to give him just that,resting her head on his chest for a moment. She could only imagine the fullness of what was going on in his head in that moment, no doubt guilt being a factor. Given the circumstances, however,she sincerely hoped he wouldn’t let guilt eat at him too much.

Her head tilted when he pulled away again, a small smile tugging at her lips at his mention of how he would react and hope how his siblings would react. The warmth she felt in that moment toward him was inconvenient considering topic matter, but she blushed slightly, leaning into the touch he gave her.

“I understand.” She said softly, an assuring look on her face which quickly morphed into worry. “My only concern is that you don’t take too much guilt upon yourself. While I cannot fault your desire to find a miracle… if you can’t, no one will blame you, Ed.”

She hugged him a little closer, peering up. “And that includes you. Would you be able to forgive yourself if you couldn’t find the answer?” She hoped her care for him was evident, her worry understood. After all, it was a sensitive topic.

Edmund’s cheeks heated up at her question and he allowed her to hug him closer. He breathed in deeply, allowing her words to blend in with the Petra voice in his head. They sounded an awful amount a like, and it made him feel as if no matter where he would go, she’d be there to warm him up, to guide him, when the world felt frozen to him. 

“I don’t deserve you,” he spoke, resting his head against her’s. “Because I know, whether I forgive myself or not, I won’t have to face it alone.” 

He pushed her just far enough from him, a grin on his face, before kissing her softly. It didn’t last long, but he knew it captured the adoration he had for her in it. He needed her to know just how much he loved her, but he wasn’t sure if he ever could. 

When they broke up, the spontaneous leading half knew what he had to do. Her question continued to burn in his mind, but it wasn’t the way that he had thought it would be. It burned out of passion, not fear and already brewing guilt. He knew that Petra knew the truth to that sentence, and it made everything inside him swell more. He couldn’t wait any longer.

Jolting alive again, he grasped her hand and became to lead her towards the balcony door. He walked backwards carefully and never took his eyes off her face. He didn’t want to miss a single moment with her. She was too precious to look a way from.

Still, he couldn’t understand what had happened that caused them to occur what felt like a lifetime ago, but he couldn’t complain. Because somehow in the heat of things, she had became everything that he needed. She was always who he had needed. 

Perhaps it was an unspoken vow for her, for she knew that she would never abandon him as long as she breathed. She loved him too dearly, that any life without him was something she would grow to despair of, the place he'd made in her very being irreplaceable.

Laughing softly, she allowed him to lead her toward the balcony, a brow lifted in query as she wondered where this new spurt of energy seemed to come from in him. Combined with the question of-- "Have I indeed?" Which came following his words, the fact he was walking backwards just for her beginning to make her curious. "Though I'll only go out if you join me...you know before you came in I actually was considering dragging you outside for fresh air. What a mind we seem to share on healthy practices concerning the outdoors."