Everything that I have in my life. everything. is beautiful. Colorado is a magical place full of growth once I learn to let go of the past. I let go of the past. I let go of the control that I hold so tightly on my life. on the people in my life. I let go. It unwinds like silky grey string wrapped around my finger. like my holey green sweater. The control and the anger and the fear and everything that inhibits me from my purest and highest and most beautiful wonderful self. I let it go. I am freeeeeee. I am so so free I am dancing around in circles I am in a sunny field in england and I am wearing a white dress and my face is golden and even and my skin is warm and my body is strong. i am grateful for my health for my radiating health. For my beautiful functioning body. It takes care of me every second it guides me it is my home. I live here in this place. In this headspace. In this sensitive empathetic home. I feel the world and the world feels me. This is my  life and my love and what I provide so readily for my loved ones. But I am strong and I am like bamboo I do not break with the wind I simply bend with strength. I bow like the beginning of a dance. I bow to the difficulties and the struggles and the hardships. I face them fearlessly. and then I continue dancing.

But with him you are beyond anything fathomable you are the highest ecstasy imaginable. Your mind melts into his being and there is nothing left to seek

Who have I become

I ache to know him