Shadowed Innocence

The Melody of the Gears: His Brother’s Keeper is live in three formats. You can get the e-book and the paperback here:…

(It’s on Amazon UK too)

I’m sure a lot of people wondered what happened to me going all disappear-ey. While it had a lot to do with what was left of my life guttering and going to shit, it also has a lot to do with my refocusing my efforts on my life work. Long story short, I published my first book. Marketing is hard work, and before everything has a chance to blow up, I’d like to let you guys at PAC have a chance to nab an early copy if you want. 

You guys are the only people in the world who I don’t have to prove my writing skills to. 

If you feel like spreading the word for me, this is the post to do it with. —And of course, feel free to follow that blog (it’s my ~~official~~ author’s blog). 

[ anansi-x-adventure ]

[text] I’ll be there soon. 

Timing was everything, and the timing of all of this couldn’t have been worse. Hazel had come to what would be taken as an unpleasant conclusion though as far as he was concerned, it was necessary; the only choice, really. 

He wasted no time in arriving at the hospital though; for the moment, nothing mattered more than Anansi’s recovery. He had to make sure that he would be alright. The redhead left the help desk after having unintentionally snapped at the nurse there, and found that he really didn’t know what he was going to do once he made it there. 

"Okay. Okay. I love you. Can I do anything for you?" He asked softly. 

[ anansi-x-adventure ]

[text] I’ll be there soon. 

Timing was everything, and the timing of all of this couldn’t have been worse. Hazel had come to what would be taken as an unpleasant conclusion though as far as he was concerned, it was necessary; the only choice, really. 

He wasted no time in arriving at the hospital though; for the moment, nothing mattered more than Anansi’s recovery. He had to make sure that he would be alright. The redhead left the help desk after having unintentionally snapped at the nurse there, and found that he really didn’t know what he was going to do once he made it there. 

"I know you don’t want me to blame myself but— I couldn’t keep my promise. I couldn’t protect you. And I can’t forgive myself for that." Hazel said matter-of-factly. He tried to hide the trembling in his voice, but failed 

Gently, he reached out and pushed Anansi’s hair from his face, carefully placing the curls so as to help make him more comfortable. The redhead’s brow was creased in concentration as he lovingly ran his fingertips over any skin that he could see that didn’t show signs of damage. 

What Anansi didn’t know was that Hazel was memorizing everything that he could; that this was his way of saying his goodbyes. 

"Stop it.  I forgive."  Why was he saying all this?  Why wasn’t he happy?  They were back together.  Anansi was safe now, he was fine.  So why didn’t Hazel look happy?

"I love you. I'm sorry."

Those two phrases seemed to be all he was capable of. The pain he felt was as though his own insides had been ripped apart. That this had happened and he hadn't been able to stop it... The thought was incomprehensible, and something that would haunt him for years no matter what he did. Hazel had been taught to be responsible. To take the blame even when it wasn't his to take, and when he perceived that it was his-- there was nothing that could stop him from destroying himself in whatever way possible until he felt that he had atoned.