hayl

people are too mean to snakes. they're just tubes and I love them

Is Russia even a real country

being 25 is like: im dying. im living my best life. im a failure. my life hasnt started. everything interesting has already happened to me. im achieving my dreams. im cutting my hair with kitchen scissors. im starting a skincare routine. im a corporate professional. im a sellout. im out of groceries. i have too many groceries. i am never going to be successful. i am going to win a hugo award before im 30. im crazy. im boring. i need to finish this essay. i need to finish this story. i need to start a newsletter. i need to start tweeting more. i need to stop tweeting. i need to ghost all my friends. i need to tell my friends i love them. i need to find a new apartment. i need to take out the trash. i am the trash that needs to be taken out. 

I want to be this big rat on the warm cloths :(

this benevolent alien is living their best life

Schrödinger’s vaguepost

this is the twitter equivalent of the sound of a gun cocking in an unlit parking garage

What does this even mean

It means you McPress McF to McPay McRespects