obsession blog

Splitting is the term used to describe when someone with BPD’s view of something shifts from one extreme to another. For example from obsessional love to all encompassing hate. 

Others sometimes call it ‘swinging’ but most use that to describe mood swings specifically.

The term is currently considered to be specific to only those with BPD/(B)PD traits.

This stems from the section in the diagnostic criteria of BPD that refers to ‘black and white thinking’ or ‘all or nothing’. It also links to frequent and extreme mood swings common of BPD. 

Splitting is regarded as a coping mechanism in regards to fear of abandonment caused by BPD. Eg ‘if I hate you it won’t hurt if you leave' 

Those with BPD say they’ve ‘split on X’ something to say when they’ve had this shift of views in regards to X thing. 

Those with BPD say they’re 'splitting’ to say that they are currently experiencing a shift in views. 

Most people use ‘split’ to describe when they shift from love to hate of something, but splitting is also accurate to describe shift from hate to love. Typically when someone with people says “I’ve split/am splitting on X” it means they currently have extreme hate/anger towards X. 

Someone with BPD can split on people, objects, ideas, concepts and on themselves- they can split on anything. 

Not all those with BPD split. 

Splitting is very difficult to control and very often the person isn’t aware they are splitting. 

I want to explain to him how exhausted I am, even in my dreams, how I wake up tired, how I’m being drowned by some kind of black wave.

ADHD is sitting in the dining hall with my friends and being able to tune into every other conversation besides the one at my own table.

ADHD is having a thought, opening my phone to follow through with it, and completely blanking on why my phone is now unlocked.

ADHD is procrastinating a 10+ page paper because something tells me I just can’t work on it right now, or I have way more time and there’s no reason to do it.

ADHD is making too many ridiculous connections in my head, then losing the conversation because I just went on such a different train of thought.