#SPORTS

Way back on November 5th, 2005, the Wollongong Hawks last beat Perth in Perth 119-92, with Glen Saville stuffing the stat sheet with 23 points (5-of-8 threes), 11 rebounds, 5 assists, 3 steals and a block to lead the way.

By Asa Schuster

The Illawarra Hawks continue to flambé their opponents at home, torching the New Zealand Breakers 87-69 on Thursday to notch their sixth straight victory at the WIN Entertainment Centre.

The visiting Breakers held strong during a tight opening quarter which saw the teams separated by a single point, but they were soon blown away during a blitzing 26-9 second stanza as the Hawks came alive in trademark style.

Kirk Penney once again tormented his former team to the tune of a game-high 28 points, including five three-pointers; in the last six games he’s averaging 24.7 points.

Kevin Lisch had 16 points, eight rebounds and four steals and Rhys Martin added 13 points, as Illawarra improved their standing in the top three on the NBL ladder and clinched the season series against the defending champs.

As part of the NBL Heritage Round the Hawks honoured their inaugural 1979 team in vibrant throwback blue and gold uniforms, creating a similar look to the current Golden State Warriors.

The thing is, the high-scoring Hawks have been resembling the Warriors for much of the season with their frenzied approach at both ends of the floor, and particularly at home where they've annihilated their last six opponents by an average of 18.5 points (+111).

An arm-wrestle of an opening quarter saw the Hawks edge ahead 21-20 on Jarrad Weeks' late three-pointer while Penney provided seven points to pace the home team.

Penney connected on an enormous three-pointer from about 26 feet out to spark a vital hot minute early in the second, where the Hawks posted an 8-0 run and grabbed the ascendency.

The Breakers briefly pulled within four points, only to be slapped by another onslaught of 15 unanswered points featuring six points from Lisch and a three-pointer from Martin.

Martin added another late strike from long-range as Illawarra held New Zealand to just nine points in the quarter to stake a commanding 48-29 lead at the half.

Fans were treated at the break with a shootout between former Hawks players, capped by legendary captains Bob Kubbinga and Mat Campbell both knocking down shots from halfway to the delight of the biggest crowd of the season (3308).

The second half dissolved into a 'laugher' with Illawarra leading by as much as 29 points in the third when Penney connected on his fifth triple.

By Asa Schuster

Aside from the general absurdity of a Twenty20 cricket match being anything other than a glorified session of batting practice (see Home Run Derby), the Big Bash League is a joke for all of the peripheral nonsense surrounding the on-field farce disguised as a ‘sporting event’.

Professional sports continues to morph into ‘entertainment’ by being dumbed down and catered to television consumption for our diminishing attention spans.

At the forefront of made-for-tv fast food sports entertainment is the Big Bash, which purposely markets itself as a must-see, must-experience shindig.

There's blaring music, pre-game dance parties, fireworks, flame-throwers, smoke machines, cheerleaders, a constant stream of in-game promotions and all the horseshit to distract from the hollow on-field product and lure spectators into a socially fluid night out.

It's essentially a party, and what happens at parties?

People endeavour to enjoy themselves, they mingle, they joke, they laugh, they go to be entertained and have fun.

Guys hit on girls, girls hit on guys, girls hit on girls and guys hit on guys, we’re so progressive these days.

But, we’re not progressive, we live in a constantly disinfected nanny state.

Let’s stop pretending the Big Bash is a serious sports realm – in terms of competitive world class sports, it’s a joke and Chris Gayle went along with the manufactured party theme that the League promotes.

On Monday night in Bellerive, Gayle had just swatted 41 runs during a furious 15-delivery stint when he made an awkward and innocuous pass on sideline reporter Mel McLaughlin.

He simply complimented her on her eyes and asked her if she wanted to join him for a drink afterwards.

He was laid back, in good spirits and didn't try to grope or kiss her (see Joe Namath), his approach was rather corny.

What ground-breaking, hard-hitting, technical and strategic questions should Gayle and McLaughlin be discussing anyway?

Again, let’s not pretend this was a serious sports, news or work environment – this was in the middle of a cheesy, forced and fabricated party atmosphere.

Don’t expect an obnoxious person riding a comically miniature bicycle in the middle of a circus to apologise for acting like a clown.

For all the people riding on their high horse, including McLaughlin; carefully examine the surroundings and context of what comprises a Big Bash fixture and realise just how unimportant and meaningless it is in the grand scheme of what could be televised, written and/or cared about instead of it.