“i can and i will, leave me alone.”

“No, you listen. Haven’t you remembered what was said? They don’t blame you! Honest to goodness they don’t. Listen, I’ll check on you in a few days, just, try to keep yourself alive?”

He’s...not okay.

At least no one’s around to harass him about this.

No, and of course Sans didn’t immediately leave, turning back after a moment to find his father. Maybe help him walk and go home. That would be fine right?

....No, it wasn’t fine. He only made it so far until he spotted his father, collapsing against the wall as the ground shook. An earthquake?

He reaches out, running towards his father until....he fades to dust.

And he wasn’t supposed to see them get hurt, but he wanted to stay to make sure they were okay, hiding himself up a vent.

It may have been a bigger mistake though, horrified as he was, he bites down on his wrist to keep from screaming when he watches his mother take a hit, staggering into his father’s arms before crumbing to dust.

....

“No...Sunshine...” Anguish, grief. A burning rage stirs in Moonlight’s soul as he steps closer, fists clenched as he wordlessly approaches the twisted royal scientist. And for a moment, Gaster seemed to hesitate. Something flickered in his eyes, before taking a step back.

Cold, the Moon swings a blade at the offender, sending a storm of bones, pushing Gaster further and further back, closer to the Core. Driven by a singular goal, nothing else mattered to him until he took his vengeance. And maybe that led to him being sloppy, his defenses dropping in favor of complete offense.

And that was just what other needed, spitting vitriol to stoke the flames, waiting for an opening. “Your wife was weak, I was going to replace her soon anyways-”

“Don’t you dare speak about her like that!” He snarls, closing the distance, eyes red with rage and grief as he struck repeatedly, pushing Gaster further and further back. If only things were that easy though.

A moment was all it took for a opening to reveal itself, and of course the other took full advantage of that, lashing out with an attack of his own and piercing Moonlight through his chest.

Yet, despite what should happen, he only steeled his gaze, standing tall before shoving the speechless Gaster down the Core before he could collect himself. Watching him fall, screaming into the lava, before staggering back, catching himself with a bone.

.....

“dad, dad, get up. get up please we need to get help for you-”

“No, you...you run home first, make sure you take care of your brother. I’ll...meet up with you later, okay? Here, take this.” Moonlight says, reaching out to grasp Sans’ hand, dropping something and closing it. “Now run along.”

“but...but dad it’s my fault i need to-”

“Quit being stubborn son, I don’t blame you. And I’m sure your mother doesn’t blame you as well. We should’ve...tried spending more time with you. That’s why you were here right? Why else...?” He sighs, gently urging his child along.

“father.....” Sans winces, taking a step forward, eyes watering before burying his face in his father’s waist. “please don’t be too long, okay...? i’m...i’m sorry i’m so sorry please don’t go.”

“Well well, who do we have here? A little rat sneaking around the lab? This place isn’t for children you know...” Strange, hostile energy just drips off from this skeleton, as he lifts Sans up by his neck. “Odd, I didn’t realize there were anymore of us. And a child at that. Maybe I can make use of you...” The stranger trails off, before Sans delivers a kick to the jaw, clawing at that hand to free himself.

Landing on the floor with a clatter, Sans hisses, teeth bared in fear as he scrambles back on his hands, fear ever so present in his eyes. 

The door slams open, the lava of the core just beyond that, and in steps his mother and father. Immediately, their weapons were drawn, rushing over to place themselves between him and Sans.

“Sans get out of here.” That command is sharply dropped, and right away he winces, rising to stand on shaky legs.

“b-” 

“I said get out. Run home, you’re mother and I will handle this.”

As one does, before sneaking out of the little home they lived in. Quietly closing the bedroom door, making his way on silent feet towards the front door; a piece of wood with multiple pieces of foil and cloth to block the chill of the outside world.

He’s not going to touch it though, instead, he closes his eyes, and pictures the world that lies beyond, feeling the pull in his soul before he opens his eyes again, now outside and shivering slightly from the chill.

He pulls his jacket closer to himself, before glancing around and starting his little trip out to where his mom should be.

Why?

Maybe he can find something out so she could stay with them all more often, instead of being out at work. He just needs to be careful to not get seen, take more shortcuts, and pay attention. It shouldn’t be that hard.

“Went out again huh? At least you’re good at avoiding being caught. But you have to remember to be careful, and don’t let anyone see you. You know what happens if you get caught, right?” His father asks, arms crossed as he addresses his little rebellious child.

“y-yeah, i know, i stick to the darker alleyways, i don’t let myself get sniffed by the puppies, and if i hear someone close i can just jump over to a shadier part of town. and you said if i get caught, i’d have to defend myself.” he says, anxiously rubbing his arms.

“Good. Don’t tell your mother or she’ll hang the both of us at this rate.” He mutters, patting Sans on his head before moving to pull off his armor.

“...mn...”

“What is it? Speak up if you want something, can’t help you if you keep quiet.”

“...what do you and mother do outside? the both of you come home really tired all the time. m-maybe i could help?”

“Pff, no Sans, what your mother does at the lab is extremely important, she’s supposed to be helping out Dr. Gaster with soul research. You remember what souls are, right?”

“mn, yeah, you and mother said it’s the...the cul-culmin-”

“Culmination of your very being, your soul is the concentration of all your magic in there. It’s very attuned to your body and mind. You’ll understand in time, but for now, just know that your soul is you. Never show it to anyone, and never mess with it. The work your mother does is very important and very difficult, so don’t worry for now.”

“and what about you?”

“Well, I’m part of the royal guard. I break up fights, catch criminals, and look for missing people. A lot of work that can get dangerous too, so don’t worry for now as well, okay?”

“....”

“Oh I know that look. Listen Sans, don’t worry about any of that. You’re still a child, what you need to be doing is learning about the world, learning how to behave, and having fun. So don’t sweat it, squirt.”

“.......okay.....” Sans sighs, shoulders starting to hunch before he was pulled and lifted into the air.

Sans huffs, shoulders hunched, fingers digging into his arms as he tries to hold back a retort. Guilt ridden because he knows the rules, but also, angry. If the outside wasn’t so fucking dumb, he could go anywhere he wanted. But no, the monsters were dangerous, especially to tiny kids like him. It’s unfair.

“....but mother-”

“No buts young man, you know the rules, but you keep trying to break the rules. Do we need to babysit you again?” She asks, arms crossed.

“...no...” That would be worse, he liked being alone, he also liked having the freedom to come and go. And besides, he knew how important their jobs were, if they kept complaining about it when they thought he wasn’t around to hear.

He knew his mother worked in the lab, trying to help figure out an answer to some impossible problem with someone named Gaster. He knew she needed to travel out early when he and his brother were still asleep, and he knew she also needed to worked even when she was home, after she read them both to sleep.

He knew his dad was busy as well, leaving in the morning with his tediously polished armor, after giving the both of them a squish and reminding them where their meals were if they got hungry. And in the evening, he usually came back with his armor dirty and looking strained. He knew his dad worked hard and once in a while when he had a day off, he’d playfully teach them how to mess around with bones, though Sans was sure this was just trying to teach them how to defend themselves.

“And stop picking at your arms, I’ve told you before that you’re going to mark yourself up, you really need to pick a better habit when you’re feeling guilty or anxious or whatever.” She snaps, and right away Sans keeps his hands to his sides, clenched in little fists.

“s-sorry....”

She sighs, rolling her eyes before bending down to pick up this tiny angry child of hers. “It’s fine Sans, come now, I’ll sing you to sleep tonight. Just....Promise me you won’t sneak out again?”

“....okay....i won’t sneak out again...”

“Promise me.”

He lets out a suffering sigh, huffing and pouting in her arms before giving in. “okay okay, i promise i won’t sneak out again.”

“That’s my boy.” She smiles, soft and light as she makes her way to his bed. Gently laying him down, and tucking him in before sitting on the bed’s edge. A tattered looking thing, scrounged up by her and her loving husband.

Simply trying their best to provide what they can.

𝅘𝅥𝅮  “Close your eyes, it is time for you to tell the world goodnight It might be dark inside, but there are still stars shining in the sky

Close your eyes, I am here and everything will be alright I am right here by your side as we go walking through the night.”

It’s quiet, like usual when their parents were out. Food was stored nearby if they got hungry, the scarce toys and books lay scattered around to pass the time.

But still, his brother huffed, pouting in his arms. Displeased by the circumstances of this situation, clearly.

“BUT WHEN WILL THEY BE HOME?” Papyrus asked, clinging to Sans’ neck as he poked around their humble home.

“sh, use your inside voice. and they’ll be home when they get home. hmmmm, how about we play some games? or i could read to you for a bit. or....we could draw.” Sans says, carefully depositing his younger sibling on the couch, arms crossed as he waited for an answer.

“Can We Go Outside?”

“no, mother said we had to stay inside unless we need food, and we’re only allowed to go out if no one is around.”

“Why?”

“i dunno, that’s what she fuh,,,,she said. and she says good kids follow the rules.”

“But You Go Out All The Time!”

“uh, yeah because i can sneak around and you can’t, and i know how to get out of trouble. and i don’t want you to get in trouble because every time one of them get mad at you, you just start cryin’ and then they have to baby you, so are you a baby or no?” 

At that comment, Papyrus seems so highly offended, arms crossed in a comical display of indignation. “No!”

“so, let’s get you something to play with until they get back. maybe they’ll bring us something new, wouldn’t that be nice? maybe father got some new snacks for us to try, or maybe mother will bring new books.”

“Okay Fine....Can You Read Me The Bunny One?”

“Oh stop that now boy, tell me where you went today. Worried me sick, did you get seen? You know the rules-” His mother chided, sliding a pitifully small plate of food over to him, before he cut in.

“n-no i didn’t get seen, i was careful, i stuck to the outskirts of town....i uh, i just wanted...to see some books. they found some about the stars.” He says, a little excited grin on his face as he picked up his fork to start eating. Even if it’s a tiny portion, mother’s food was delicious like always. Made with love, she said, be it measly pasta, or scrounged up soup of whatever they could find. And maybe if they were lucky they found some leftovers in town by that shiny restaurant.

And he never complained, food is food, he doesn’t get that hungry often anyways.

“The stars hm? You know....I might have a book or two lying around for you if you’d like.” She says, turning to wash the dishes, quietly humming.

“really? can, can i see them later?” He asks, looking hopefully at her turned back.

“Only if you promise me that you’ll stay inside the house and watch your brother tomorrow. You know your father and I will be busy right? And we know you’re very responsible when you need to be.”

“mhhh.....okay....i promise i’ll stay and watch my little brother. where are you guys goin’ anyways?”

“Well, I’ll be at the lab in Hotland, and your father will be at the capital. food for the day will be in the icebox in the snow, if you need something hot you know how to work the fire. And make sure you stay in the house.”

“okay, okay, geeez. can you read us a story tonight mother?”

“Of course Sans. Now finish up your food, growing children like you need to eat.”

“Oh there are you, silly boy, where did you run off to? You know it’s dangerous out there. Especially....well, that doesn’t matter. You worried your mother sick you know, she’s been tearing up the place trying to find you.” Dressed in guard attire, the older skeleton grabbed him by the arm, hoisting him up and in the air playfully.

“s-sorry father, i didn’t mean to stay out late. i just wanted to...to go to the library. they had new books.” Sans piped up sheepishly, trying to hide the little grin as he looked down at his dad. He reaches out, a small grunt in protest until he’s brought to settle on that sturdy, steady chest.

“Head stuck in the books again huh Sans? Come on little bookworm, we got supper to get back to. And probably a little chiding, so prepare yourself.” There’s a comforting chuckle, and Sans groaned and whined and huffed.

“why do we gotta stay away from town anyways? wouldn’t it be easier if we lived there instead of out here?” He asks, arms around his dad’s neck, keeping an eye behind.

“....Well, we don’t really like being too close to people. It’s safer this way, remember?”

“more like fuckin’ borin’.”

“Well you can make the rules when you grow up and get a job. And make sure you reel that language in, your mother will make you eat soap again.”

“ewwww okay okay....when can i grow up and get a job then?”

Because what kind of cruel world would decide to continue the torment that drags him in and out of sleep? Why, he wants to ask. Why does he keep feeling like he’s missing something, like he’s forgotten something important.