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@hamilburn-blog
I'd like to report that I am always innocent and anything said about me is a lie bc I don't sin UNLIKE MY PARENTS
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
Stop writing into the paper, child. No one knows what you’ve done
(feel free to share)
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Word on the street is Elizabeth Schuyler (lookarcund) was seen getting a bit too cozy with her husband's closest friend, John Laurens (gotta-rise-up).
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
Word on the street that Elizabeth Schuyler’s ( @lookarcund ) husband was also seen getting a bit too cozy with his best friend Laurens ( @gotta-rise-up )
It’s good that they gravitate towards the same people, right? At least they have something in common.
yOU ALL ARE SO DESPERATE FOR FRESH GOSSIP I'M NOT SLEEPING WITH ANYONE I HAVE A CHILD FOR GOD'S SAKE
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
Really?
I'd like to report a rumored affair between Eliza Hamilton (nxrrative) and Thomas Jefferson (viirginian), of all people.
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
Okay so like. Eliza ( @nxrrative ) totally has the right to go and get herself some action after that horrid Reynold’s Pamphlet. I think everyone can 110% agree on that point.
But Thomas Jefferson ( @viirginian )? Really? Couldn’t choose anyone better?
My informants have been rather quiet. What’s been going on out there? Give me all those dirty little secrets.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I heard Eliza Schuyler (lookarcund) invited Maria Reynolds (ishelpless) into her home even after the affair with her husband...
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
I mean…Alex did pay almost a thousand dollars just to keep fucking her. So there’s that. She must be pretty good. If a husband and wife ( @lookarcund ) sleep with the same person ( @ishelpless ), is it still adultery?
where the frickity frack is all my gossip?
My informants have been rather quiet. What’s been going on out there? Give me all those dirty little secrets.
rumor; u ruined my life in a 95 page pamphlet. oH WAIT THAT'S NOT A RUMOR IT HAPPENED
sORRY RUMORS ONLY
I heard a rumor that Alexandra wrote a 95 page smut story about her affair.
Not sure if it counts as juicy gossip, but word on the street is that Miss Theodosia Burr (myfxtherseyes) is planning on running for senate, despite being a woman and only 19
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
Well, that’s going to be tough since the constitution states you have to be 30. Sexism aside, I don’t think she’s going to get on the ballet anytime soon.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
My informants have been rather quiet. What’s been going on out there? Give me all those dirty little secrets.
Reports say that Philip Hamilton (mynamesphilip) and Louisa Burr (forgottenburrdaughter) were seen alone in the garden after a ball. What might come of this? A Hamilton with a Burr bastard!
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
Well if they were seen alone together, then they weren’t really alone, were they?
Get outta there y’peeping tom.
(someone run and tell Daddy Hamilton that his son’s ( @mynamesphilip ) fucking the Burr bastard ( @forgottenburrdaughter ). That’ll cause him to write at least 60 pages, right? Considering his own affair got 95?)
Submitted by @writtendeliverence
This just in, in no way is this gossip or news of the sort. Just about everyone who knows this person is aware of the fact in five minutes. Thomas Jefferson is an asshole who is obsessed with macaroni. My testimony being having to be in the room with him, when it happened. And eating shitty macaroni he wouldn’t shut up about.
—- A dot Ham
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
What the hell is Jefferson’s deal about macaroni? It’s not even that good.
Did he make you eat a shit ton? Was it awful?
"actually , the reason i ruined her is because i /ruined her/ if you know what i mean"
THIS IS A F A M I L Y FRIENDLY NEWSPAPER. I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE INSULTED.
but please tell us more. (commenting on your sex life can hardly be good for re-election, right?)
Alex: *gets dragged* Alex: S L ANDER IS ILLEGAL
SO IS ADULTERY MOTHER
R O A S T E D
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Looks like Louisa (forgottenburrdaughter) has a brother who also looks eerily similar to Burr! Curious readers did their own digging and found their mother to be one Mary Emmons - a servant who had previously served in the Prevost household! Poor Mrs. Burr!
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
There we have it, readers – The servant thought to be sleeping with SENATOR BURR (consensually? Nonconsensually? Nonetheless, supposedly resulted in illegitimate pregnancies) is none other than a M i s s Mary Emmons – Louisa’s ( @forgottenburrdaughter ) mother.
Who has another child! Those Burr genetics sure are strong
I HEARD THAT JOHN LAURENS (laurxns & braveryborn) AND MARQUIS DE LAFAYETTE (balanceshifts & likelancelot) ARE SUPER IN LOVE AND GAY AND ARE GONNA E SECRETLY MARRIED BYE
L E T T E R TO THE E D I T O R ;;
Good for Laurens ( @laurxns & @braveryborn ) and Lafayette ( @balanceshifts & @likelancelot ). Gay is good pals
I hear wedding bells
