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imagine this heat and you roll over in bed an there’s some cunt there next to you. bruv id be inconsolable

this disability pride i wanna keep in mind the disabled people who are in a difficult situation because of their disability. people who were made homeless because of their disability, people who are stuck in abusive homes and can't get out because of their disability. people whose disability was used against them to facilitate abuse, like taking away their autonomy - medical, legal, or otherwise - taking charge of their finances, taking advantage of their vulnerabilities. it's reasonable to think that a lot of disabled people, especially disabled people in difficult circumstances such of these, would struggle to connect with the idea of disability pride. but pride or otherwise, this month should also be disability solidarity month. this month and every month is for all disabled people in all sorts of circumstances

can I get a job as an editor but the only thing I do is correct when someone uses the word "prone" when they mean "supine"

i eat your grandads clothes

Macklemoth

Why is it that every time I google something like "Are olives poisonous to cats" the top results are always like "Fun fact: Cats are carnivores! This means that they eat meat. There is no reason to include olives in a cat's diet. You should feed your cat cat food, which is dry or wet food especially designed for cats. You can purchase this at a store." like is there a single person alive on the planet who's googled "Are blueberry muffins safe for cats" because they're planning on switching their cat to a muffin-only diet??? No, I'm asking because the little bastard somehow popped open the packet while I was putting away the groceries and dragged one under the couch before I could react and now I need to know if I should call the after-hours vet. "Cats should not eat spaghetti." NO SHIT, SHERLOCK!!!! "Try to keep human food away from cats." i live in a studio apartment with a completely silent and permanently hungry apex predator who has the intelligence of a toddler and the desperate Machiavellian cunning of a creature who spent his formative months on the streets. He can already open doors and he is this 👌 close to learning how to open the microwave. He is stronger than me and covered in knives. So im gonna do my best but for the moment i just need you to tell me whether this yoghurt is going to kill my son y/n

For plants specifically, there’s also a wildly detailed set of posts and listings about toxicity on the old, wonderful, Plants Are the Strangest People blog

"Stronger than me and covered in knives" 😹😻😼

ever since i was a little girl i’ve had dreams of becoming an eccentric middle aged man

having a hometown is such a fucked up concept. i grew up here so i do not want to stay here anymore. i miss it when i am away but once i am back i realise why i wanted to go away as far as possible from it. i am familiar with every corner of this place i did not realise when it slowly changed into something unrecognisable. i would probably like to be buried here but i'd rather die than live here

wow you have dogshit taste (remembers im trying to be nicer to people who like different things) uh i mean, it's beautiful how the breadth of human experience is so wide it encompasses those with good taste and those with dogshit taste

Whenever I replay fallout new Vegas I can’t stop thinking about how the game starts with you being shot in the head and that’s a big deal but then you spend the rest of the game getting shot by enemies, sometimes including in the head, and you just walk it off no prablem

i dont think straight people should be allowed to do "enemies to lovers" i think if a man is your enemy you need to trust that you were correct the first time and slay him in battle

hey are you busy for the next 50 years? I’d like to sit on the porch with you and watch the sunsets

everyone's a monsterfucker until the 'monster' is a rock with limbs and then it's ohhh but markiplier!! cowards.