Humans are one of the best vocal mimics on the planet, and second-best of all simians, coming second only to hobbits. One of those little shits can perfectly mimic the sound of your fridge having a spontaneous catastrophic breakdown, and no amount of close personal inspection will fully reassure you that it isn't actually broken. And then you get back to the living room and that fur-footed little cunt is sitting right there on your couch, in your spot.

are we talking, like, tolkien hobbits, or is there a noise-mimicing mammalian species called hobbit that i've been unaware of? /gen

Reminder that hobbits also have incredible aim and one of the first things Tolkien says about them in the first book of The Lord Of The Rings is -and I'm paraphrasing "if you see a hobbit pick up a rock at any distance, run the fuck away, but not in a straight line, throw some zigs and zags in there"

Théoden does describe hobbits as good vocal mimics: "There are no legends of their [hobbits'] deeds, for it is said they do little, and avoid the sight of men, being able to vanish in a twinkling; and they can change their voices to resemble the piping of birds."

I'm adding onto this by saying that it's OK to dislike an animal! It's OK to say that an animal scares you or that you generally do not like being around them!! What ISN'T ok is trying to justify your hatred towards them by claiming they are some kind of mass murdering evil super villain that should go extinct because of their natural behaviour or appearance, because if you do that you are an asshole and i think you should educate yourself