Happiness is only real when it's shared.

I haven't written in a very long time.  I have a few things to say about 2014. First and foremost, 2014 has been one of the hardest years of my life, in a good/bad way.  I lost a few people who meant the world to me. They taught me a few lessons. Cherish the times you had with them and let go of ones you care about.  Maybe they'll come back into my life, maybe they won't but one thing is for sure, I will not be waiting for you. As hard as it is losing someone you care about, you gotta let go, right? At the end of the day we're all left with memories.  I can't think about the 'what ifs' in life anymore. I need to start chasing my dreams, for me. 

On December 14, 2014 I graduated college. Something some people (mostly family) doubted I would finish. Learning from my aunt that my cousin thought I would drop out and was surprised I graduated was one of the toughest pills to swallow. Hearing that made me a stronger person.  I will not let a few negative opinions and doubts keep me from moving on and achieving so much more than I expected for myself.  I'm channeling any negative energy and making it positive because at the end of the day, I'm living my life, no one else.

--But you know whats really fucked up? If you knew anything about me, I don't take bullshit classes, I study, I work hard for my grades, I don't half ass anything. So suck on that haters.--

A few days later, I got a job offer.  I've always wanted a media related job, so I figured why not. I scared as hell but I will always give it my best shot as I do every job I've ever had. 

Lets back up to earlier in 2014, I visited Colorado.  That was one of the best weekends of my life. Lets fast forward to the summertime when I worked 3 jobs, 12 hour days, and took an online class. Crazy? Yeah. I know.  I just wanted to get my mind off things and just work until I mentally/physically couldn't. 

Fast forward to now, today, January 2, 2015.   I made a list of things I need to accomplish and a few resolutions.  For the past few years I've made a list of things I need to do and taped it to my door, so its a constant reminder.  Crossing things off a list is fun too.

Looking back at 2014, it was such a ugly and beautiful year.  I've cried more than I ever have, I laughed more than I ever have, I made more concrete/genuine friendships than I ever have, I smiled more than I ever have, I have a better grasp and understanding of the world and what I want and what I want to accomplish than I ever have.  But isn't that life is all about? Growth? So lets grow together, lets make beautiful memories together, lets cry, smile, and laugh more together. 

1: Close your eyes and think of five things that make you smile when you think about them. What are they?

2: If your house was on fire and you had sixty seconds to leave, what would you take with you?

3: When you're alone in the middle of the night and you can't quite get to sleep, what do you think about? "Going to sleep" doesn't count.

4: What is love to you?

5: What is the opposite of love?

6: Is it possible to love someone if you don't love yourself?

7: Do you believe mutual attraction based on mutual hatred is possible?

8: Is it better to have something amazing and lose it or to never have had it to begin with?

9: Do you focus more on the past, the present, or the future?

10: Do you judge people for what they wear or how they express themselves?

11: Do you believe in individuals over generalisations?

12: When you're very scared or worried, what do you think about or do to help you feel better?

13: How do you feel about what happens after death?

14: Would you rather live a hedonistic life full of good things that make you feel good even if they're bad for you, or a healthy life centered around treating your body like a sacred temple and watching your health as closely as possible? Or do you not care either way?

15: Do you think you can tell a lot about a person from the way they express themselves or answer questions like these?

16: Do you have any special or magical memories you'll always have with you?

17: How would you define yourself, without saying your name or giving a physical description of yourself or your obvious personality?

18: When do you feel truly at peace?

19: Do you like having your worldview or opinions challenged or questioned?

20: Do you believe happiness can exist without sadness?

21: Is there a reason for existence?

22: Do you think the world existed before you did?

23: Do you believe people need breaks from each other, even if they're deeply in love?

24: What do you find most beautiful in people?