A l'entrada del temps clar

Mythological Figure, Orlando Furioso Reference, Guy in Location

Opera titles now:

Abstract Concept, Book You Should Have Read By Now, Evocative but Essentially Vague Phrase

Opera titles always:

I'm going to try it.

First, let me preface this with something very important: you can treat all of this advice as SECOND-DRAFT ADVICE. It is so much easier to rewrite this kind of stuff once you have words on the page. Telling yourself the first draft is totally appropriate and acceptable.

What we’re talking about here are FILTER WORDS (and to some degree verbs of being). Yes, “thought” words are included. But so are “heard, saw, looked, tasted, smelled” etc.—most words having to do with the senses.

This isn’t black and white advice; sometimes you’ll use these words and that’s okay. They’re not WRONG. They’re just weaker. And they’re weaker because they create distance between the reader and the experience of the character.*

If you want your reader to feel like they’re experiencing the story right alongside the character, you want to cut down on filter words.

*This is particularly important with first person and close third POVs. The reader always knows whose eyes they’re seeing through and thoughts they’re privy to. So you don’t need to tell them “I saw X.” Or “I heard X.” Or “I thought Y.” You can just jump into the action/observation as it’s happening.

This is also where you want to pay attention to verbs of being.

you want to pay attention

to verbs of being.

That means that when you read a line like

John saw that the curtains were open.

It immediately takes you OUT of the character's perspective and instead tells you what they experience as a secondhand observation.

You don't have to get fancy or purple with how you rephrase things like this. Not everything needs a ton of breathing room.

You wanna know what's perfectly impactful while keeping a tight POV?

The curtains were open.

"Horse but make it a lizard and give it bat wings and horns"

didnt know how to interpret "make it a lizard" so i wrote lizard and drew an arrow pointing to the horse so people know its a lizard. Also didn't know what bat horns were so I gave it a horned bat nose

"A body like a big cat but completely covered in scales, the head of a crocodile with the horns of an ibex, and the wings of a bat on its back"

On it boss o7, ive mashed all these animals together and threw scales all over it. This the dragon you saw?

"Take a lizard, extend the neck. Add a pair of bat wings to the back. Add horns and sharp teeth."

Seems like we're onto somethin' boss! Though idk how it'd be so fearsome bein such a small thing.

"Big-ass lizard with wings" "big lizard" "Giant lizard" "Big fucking lizard"

don't seem too special?

"Imagine a winged alligator that was 70 feet tall and aware of its existence"

i dont know if this is a dragon but it could definitely be some kind of god

"Dinosaur with wings and horns?"

Dunno which dino you were talkin about so i just picked a random one. Stegosauus :}

"Big snake with legs and horns that can breathe fire"

Ah. Hm.

usb: universal serial bus

usc: university of southern california

usd: united states dollar

BUS??? I thought it was for a wheelie type of bus, the one that gets pple places???? And wondered how that acronym escaped spn civilian ff while sht like eta and fubar got in

Btw Ust = unresolved sexual tension

Upd: to the anonymous cowards saying I'm an idiot for not googling it right away - it seemed to frigging obvious to google.

Ya don't google to check the sun is hot. And me not being from the states, I kinda assumed there might be indeed buses with a name like that - that I haven't heard of them before is odd but not impossible. I only learned about tesco, walmart, etc from ff or tumblr because newsflash - where I live there are none :) And chinese for example have wechat to pay for things, it's a national wide thing that works in every village and I haven't heard about it either before checking travel reviews. The world has variety and "common knowledge" or "too big a brand for smb not to know about it" rly depends on the context

as lead roles and impressive personalities and soldiers and love interests and villains

all allowed to play serious characters and not treated as anything but normal

You know that thing where a story is written in tight third person limited — we’re meant to be inside someone’s head, seeing the world through their thoughts — and then suddenly the narration says “the blond frowned” or “the shorter woman sighed” about a person the POV character knows really well?

That’s called antonomasia — using a descriptive label instead of a name. And it’s fine when we’re talking about strangers: “the cashier handed her the receipt,” “the tall guy blocked the door.” The POV character doesn’t know their names, and we just need a quick way to tell people apart.

But the moment it’s used for someone the POV character already knows, it breaks immersion. Because that’s not how our minds work. We don’t think “the older man smiled at me.” We think “Mark smiled.” Or maybe “my boss” if that relationship matters in the moment.

Third person limited means the narration sits inside someone’s perception. Their inner monologue is the story’s voice. So when you switch from “Mark smiled” to “the blond smiled,” you’ve pulled the camera away from their mind and turned it into an outside shot.

If you want to create distance or irritation, you can do it on purpose —

“The idiot from accounting emailed again.”

That’s character voice. That’s judgment. That works.

But otherwise?

As soon as your POV character knows someone’s name, use it. While we do tend to worry about repetitions, names rarely register as such to the readers.

If you need variety for rhythm, use relational or emotional identifiers that make sense in their head: her friend, his partner, their teacher, the person they loved.

Because inside someone’s thoughts, there are no “blonds” or “brunettes.”

I refuse to believe that we dressed that ugly.

You expect to believe that there was no color, no bead work, no embroidery? Just the most blah and bland item ever.

We have the clothing for Kohanim and Kohan Gadol described in the Torah and it is so beautiful.

Sure regular people aren't going to dressed like that, but seriously I'm expected to buy that no didn't interesting patterns with their weaving.

That no dyed their yarn? That everyone worn shades of brown and tan and white and the occasional light blue.

I know us. I know we enjoy beauty too. I know that it would a way to express ourselves and the areas of the land we live in.

We expect to buy that not single one of use didn't have pomegranate something going on in their clothes or any of the 7 species.

That we didn't go all out for Shabbat wear.

Give me a break.

"In ancient times undergarments of this kind were held together by a girdle, made of linen (Jer. xiii. 1), leather (II Kings i. 8), or gold (Dan. x. 5), and called "ḥagor" or "ezor " in the case of the priests (Ex. xxviii. 4 et seq.), or "abneṭ" (Isa. xxii. 21) in the case of officials. The original dress of the Israelites changed somewhat under Syrian and Babylonian influence. On Egyptian monuments the Syrians are clad in long, tight-fitting upper garments, striped in blue and dark red, richly embroidered, and in yellow undergarments with tight-fitting sleeves, and tight trousers (compare Josh. vii. 21)."

"Deuteronomy and the ordinances for the priests command that tassels ("gedilim," and "ẓiẓit") be attached to the corners of the coat (Deut. xxii. 12; Num. xv. 38 et seq.)"

"It was made of the same materials as the lower one, in early times generally of wool, in Palestine of flax also; but later on purple stuff was imported from Phenicia, byssus from Egypt, and artistic weavings and embroideries from Babylonia (Josh. vii. 21; Zeph. i. 8). The nobles often dressed in white (Eccl. ix. 8; compare the garments of the priests), but it is probable that gorgeously colored garments, like those found on the Syrian figures in Egyptian monuments, were also much used."

"At a later period the nobles wore over the upper garment, or in place of it, a wide, many-folded mantle of state ("adderet" or "ma'aṭafah") made of rich material (Isa. iii. 22), imported from Babylon (Josh. vii. 21)."

Lear’s Macaw aka Indigo Macaw (Anodorhynchus leari), family Psittacidae, found only in northeast Bahia, Brazil

ENDANGERED.

When really it is "I find it unnerving how fast people make fun of physical disability and equate it to moral goodness when you make it slightly ok to do so in context."

As an example, a lot of groups claim to be “pro-women”, when in reality they are actually anti-trans. Their goal is not to uplift women, it’s to harass and criminalize trans people.

like yes of course there are singers who are unbelievably conventionally attractive and who most people would think of as "beautiful" on first glance

but also so many famous opera singers just look like normal people and maybe don't quite fit typical beauty standards in one way or other

and they have lovely voices and are great actors and are cast as charming romantic characters whom the narrative holds up as the most beautiful heroic attractive people in the world