the rule of three.

bro I’ve been hyped for this one

i stroll into the little saltwater store in the city. a border collie comes barreling over and begins nibbling my toes through my open heels. the dude behind the counter introduces himself and asks me if i have any tanks at home or if he needs to set one up for me. i tell him that i have 16 tanks and ask him if he has any personal ones before he can comment on that number. he proceeds to say “yeah, i have a 120 in my office. it has a clam in it.” i cautiously respond “oh, a clam?” and he whips out his phone which already has a livestream up on it. it’s centered on the biggest clam i’ve ever seen, just chillin’ in this tank and taking up half of the available floorspace in a 120 gallon. “that’s my baby,” he says, and points at the unholy bivalve in case i didn’t notice it on my own. there are now two border collies snorfling at my toes while i stare in awe at this dude’s gigantic fucking clam

Op is he single

idk but i’m wondering if my guy would mind if i left him for a positively stunning clam

Date him to lull him into a false sense of security and Steal His Clam

me when i’m at the pizza hut beverage trough