Step Right Up For The GrandRomantic

whale fall side of tumblr you understand me

My mans unlocked a higher level of synesthesia

It’s wild how when you’re fat or even just not skinny you don’t get to wear fucking anything

image: tumblr content warning that this post has been marked Mature Content. end ID.

$19 / $120 ❗

$45 / $120 ❗❗

phone bill's due tomorrow ❗

I just saw the world's freshest baby in Panera bread. Like that thing was JUST out of the oven. I've heard of being wet behind the ears but this baby was wet behind the everything. It was still damp.

friend who went to bed is a type of dead wife

halo lore is so fucking funny to me. all it really needed to be was 'youre john halo and youre a badass space marine that doesnt afraid of anything' but instead youre a war orphan created by the space CIA to be a robo-pinkerton to put down galactic worker revolts, but luckily whole hordes of you were created right in time for the most evil alien empire to ever exist to make first contact with us by nuking a planet to glass

also, the evil alien empire isnt doing this because theyre evil, their trio of space popes asked an ancient sacred AI what the fuck humans were and the ai was like 'oh those are ants that god loves more than you' and the popes immediately decided the only way to keep their cushy jobs and big dumb hats was to annihilate the human race. it almost worked, too! luckily, one of the robo-pinkertons is so freakishly lucky an AI noticed the statistical anomalies surrounding him and took him in as her favorite little meow meow and now they have a toxic co-dependent relationship and are going to nuke alien new york

This show is an accurate portrayal of how artists are hopeless dumbasses and we need a producer type to bring us back to earth to get anything meaningful done and I’m here for it

You can't beat a nice steak and kidney pie

I can, actually #violence #myfist #meateverywhere