Let The Sun Touch Your Skin

“I - I don’t know,” Davey answered quietly, with a hitched breath. “I’ve tried. I’ve been trying, I’m - I’m still trying. I want to m-move on, I want to be happy, more than anything I want that. But I can’t - I can’t figure out how. Hell, Gracie, I - sometimes it’s like - like I don’t even remember wh-what happy feels like. And - and no matter what I do, it keeps coming back, the nightmares, and the flashbacks, the paranoia, the - everything. It’s like - it’s like I’m… haunted.”

“You’ve got to find out what you love, and do that.  Have you been getting therapy?  Is...is that not working?”  She shook her head and crossed her arms.  “I never wanted any of this to happen to you.  You were supposed to get away from all your problems, write all those books, maybe get a dog or find a nice girl.  I’ve always just wanted you to be happy.  Is...isn’t there anything you enjoy doing?  Something that doesn’t give you flashbacks?”

“Well, erm, yeah, they’re - I’ve been improving. But, well, th-things got a lot worse before they got better. I - God, Gracie, you would’ve hated me if you’d b-been around. I did - I did some awful things, I - I tried to - I thought I’d killed myself, I thought it’d worked, so I hadn’t - the th-things Rod made me do, I didn’t think it was real, I wouldn’t have - if I’d realized - I - I messed up, Gracie, I messed up s-so much…”

“Davey?  Take a deep breath, alright?”  She said, looking at him concerned.  “All I ever wanted was for you to be happy.  To go on with your life, get away from Rod.  Write your books.  Maybe get a dog.”  Gracie looked away again for a moment, letting silence fall between them.  “Do you think you could still go on and be happy?”

“Well, er, no, I - I haven’t gotten around to much writing. I’ve, er - I’ve kind of - I’ve b-been in and out of hospitals. Things - I mean, after you… died, things - things got a lot worse, and I’ve - I’ve just - I’ve had to get help, for - for everything.”

Gracie lowered her head.  “Davey, I...this is never the kind of life I wanted you to live.  I wanted you to go off, find a way to be happy,”  She said.  “Are...are things getting any better?”

“Well, I, er - ” He dropped his gaze, reaching up to scratch uncomfortably at the back of his neck. “I - I graduated. And, er, I’ve been staying with V-val and Eddie… part of the time…”

“Well duh, I figured you graduated,”  She said cocking her head from side to side.  “Val?  I remember her.  She always seemed pretty cool,”  Gracie nodded.  “What about the other part of the time?  Living in a giant mansion that you bought after getting rich off of selling your books?”

“So, you’re… have you been a ghost this - this wh-whole time?”

“It’s complicated,”  She explained, hoping to leave it at that.  “Now come on, Davey, tell me what you’ve been up to!  I can only get so much news of the outside world.”

“No! No, no, wait, just - ” He took a long deep breath before slowly opening his eyes again, trying to take in the sight of his best friend who’d been dead for fifteen years. “Is - is this real?”

Gracie turned back around, a small smile now on her face.  “Yeah,”  She nodded.  “I promise.  You’re not dreaming or hallucinating.  I’m here.  Kind of.”

Slowly, Davey shook his head, bringing his hands up to his temples and closing his eyes. “No, no, no, you’re not - you can’t be - I - I came to terms with it, the d-doctors, they said I’d got past this - you’re - you’re gone…”

Gracie stared at Davey for a moment, then glanced away with a sad look in her eyes.  “I knew this was a bad idea...”  She mumbled.  “I didn’t mean to bother you, Davey.  I’m just glad to see that you haven’t given up.  I’ll go find some other people and try to scare them instead...”

“G-gracie?!” he managed to sputter out, his voice practically a squeak. “I - I don’t - how did you - when did you - ?”

“You mean how am I here?”  She waved her hand.  “It’s a big complicated mess.  Is that what you really want to talk about?  It’s been ages since I’ve seen you.  I wanna know what you’ve been up to.”

“Holy Hell…”

“What?  You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”  She laughed.  “I could say the same about you, you know.  Almost didn’t recognize you, with your growth spurt and all.  Did you really decide to let your hair grow out long?”

“No, it doesn’t,” micah said, shrugging and smirking down at the girl. He almost felt sorry, as if taking the life of an innocent wouldn’t solve all his problems but it could even solve one it was enough for him. He aimed his wand down at her, looking at her straight in the eyes with his dead ones.