GOTHINK

Mad people, people who stand alone and burn.  I’m attracted to them because they give me permission to do the same.

Your silence has been with me and I have let it have its say. I feel, as always, the same closeness to you which your silence makes into a kind of speech of its own.

At present this horror of life is already less pronounced, and the melancholy less acute. But I still have no will, and hardly any desires, or none at all that are to do with ordinary life, for example, almost no wish to see friends, although I do think of them. That is why I am still not ready to leave here now or in the near future. I should feel depressed about everything again. And anyway, it is only recently that my loathing of life has been drastically changed. There is still a long way to go from that to willing and doing.

So this was the rest of his life. It felt like a party to which he’d been invited, but at an address he couldn’t actually locate. Someone must be having fun at it, this life of his; only, right at the moment, it wasn’t him.