Gothams' fave beauty blogger

If a fantasy world has an ancient tree of wisdom, that means it must also have young trees that are dumb as shit. Just giving terrible advice like, "the evil wizard is kinda hot"'

favorite thing about Peter Parker is he will be the quippy class clown UNTIL someone more annoying than him shows up. then he'll be like hmmm. maybe we should both be addicted to shutting the fuck up actually

someone calls him "pg-13 deadpool" one (1) time and he takes a vow of silence. it lasts all of three hours but that's about 6 times longer than anyone else has gotten him to Stop

Hey so uhhh why has the spirit of Gotham been haunting me in my dreams lately. Any ideas?

Fashion tips?

Could be, Bat knows my wardrobe needs an overhaul

Batman's kids immediately posting this on social media: "UMMM LOVE WINS??? BATMAN FINALLY PROPOSED🙏🫶💯💥❤️🧡💛💚💙💜"

meet cute: it's raining and I see your battered bleeding body lying in the mud and I kick it slightly to see if you're dead

Gotham do be like that

Im gonna go feral if I don't get my Boba today. My favorite Boba shop just closed down and I just was my Taro milk tea with extra boba- it's not that much to ask for!!

God I love Gotham Villan Origin stories

My little pony, transformers, Peppa pig, the wiggles, dora the explorer,

what the fuck is ‘the wiggles’ it sounds like a shitty strip club

They're a kids entertainment group that sing songs and dance and stuff, they have been around for decades now. Top hits include "fruit salad" "toot toot chugga chugga big red car" "hot potato" "Dorothy the dinosaur" they're on YouTube if you get curious enough

Omg I accidentally yeeted some m&ms off the balcony once and accidentally smacked one of the local bats in the head so they yelled and I screamed and started crying and it was a mess

My little pony, transformers, Peppa pig, the wiggles, dora the explorer,

In that case may I please have a tall lavender iced latte with oat milk?

Of course dear! That’ll be either £1.50 or 𝓈ℴ𝓂ℯ𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃ℊ 𝓎ℴ𝓊 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉 𝓇𝒾𝒹 ℴ𝒻.

Oh actually my balcony strawberries went wild this year after Poison Ivy passed by and now I have 27 quartz of homemade strawberry jam (not poisoned, I've tested), would you be interested in swapping a Jar or 10?

I’d love that for my recipes, dear. Ten jars will guarantee you ten different drinks within reason.

Perfect, I'll bring the jars in on my next visit, for now I'll pay cash ❤️

In that case may I please have a tall lavender iced latte with oat milk?

Of course dear! That’ll be either £1.50 or 𝓈ℴ𝓂ℯ𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃ℊ 𝓎ℴ𝓊 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉 𝓇𝒾𝒹 ℴ𝒻.

Oh actually my balcony strawberries went wild this year after Poison Ivy passed by and now I have 27 quartz of homemade strawberry jam (not poisoned, I've tested), would you be interested in swapping a Jar or 10?

I’d love that for my recipes, dear. Ten jars will guarantee you ten different drinks within reason.

Perfect, I'll bring in the Jars next time I come in, for now I'll pay cash 💗