Goldfinch's Journal

Sep 24, 928 ANMM

It feels oddly blashemous for me to put quill to this paper. This is Mother's book, her journal, but I feel as if these last pages were meant to be mine, as it falls to me to write the unthinkable.

My name is Thrush, of the Songbird family. Loving daughter, abandoned sister, and lost soul. Guardian of the growing stones, Wielder of Darkness, and the Mare who shall wait for as long as she lives. This is not to be my story, but an ending to that of my Mother.

Goldfinch, of the Songbird family, is gone. The Chieftain of the Tatanka Buffalo Tribe came himself to tell us, and to honor her. They told me that she fell in the North, and though I do not wish to believe it, they brought me the remains of her armor. It has been 18 years since she disappeared. Father remains heartbroken, though he puts on a brave face for me. The Chieftain says she is beyond death now, though she cannot return to us. He has offered me his greatest sympathy, and granted me the help of the tribe, whenever I need it. But I do not think I will ever take that offer.

My life has been filled with loss. Once upon a time, I had the most wonderful sister, and the kindest mother, but some terrible fate has conspired to take them both. I cannot say if it is strength or cowardice which makes me move on, but I am a Songbird, and I shall live the life my Mother wished for me in her writings.

The Granite Blossom has stopped growing. I continue to gather the last remaining flowers so that there will be some for the future, though the amount will be limited. The Equestrians took samples when they departed, but reports are that they have not been able to make them grow. Mother's knowledge of Dark magic has all been written within these pages as well, and now I have her last gift, the runic armor she wore on her journeys. My duty is to ensure that we are always ready should the Violet Plague strike again. And so I shall now take the place of the legendary Goldfinch, who I only ever knew as 'Mother'.

This is the last page of her Journal. There are no bodies. There is no proof.

All I have are the gravestones I had erected amidst the long line of the Songbird family. And so I shall at long last put them both to rest.

Goldfinch

Meadowlark

I shall sing for you both, now.

Apr 10, 910 ANMM

When first I set down to write these pages, I never knew where they would take me, and where it will take you. Know that in reading these pages, I am putting faith in you to one day complete my quest. This is the story of one unicorn's travels and struggles. How one unicorn traveled through Tartarus and back to save the world, and failed.

Fate has brought me to this point, where I have to leave you, and for that I'm sorry. I love you, Thrush. I've spent the past few months recording everything within this book that you need to know to carry on. Your father will watch over you, I think he understands. He will keep you safe, but your sister's fate is unknown. I will bring her back, I promise you.

I will go to the Buffalo, and they will help me once again, as they did so long ago. They know what has happened, as they foresaw it alongside me when I first started my journey. I will save Meadowlark. I cannot abandon her.

Jan 07, 910 ANMM

I remember Everything, now. I remember it all too late. I've seen this damned path before. I feel like I've always known it, but never wanted to see it. And now she's gone, because I was too weak.

He took her. I don't know how. I don't know why. Only that it was Him. The darkness from my visions. Death. The thing I saw and the pain I felt long ago in the Buffalo's camp, that pain and loss. A Hunter of Death. Not one who seeks their own death, nor the death of others. I will Hunt down the very Avatar of Death itself, and destroy him utterly if that's what it takes to bring her back.

Born by darkness, and raised to die. That's what he said he'd take. Well, gods damn him, she was born by my dark magic, but she was not raised to die!

You cannot take her from me!

She is my daughter!

I will find you…

I will hunt you down!

My Meadowlark... Remember... just remember...

Jul 9, 900 ANMM

Today I break the long silence to add an entry to this journal, for today is another event worth recording for posterity. Today marks the birth of my second daughter, a healthy baby unicorn we've named Thrush. Copper feels outnumbered, but I think his only fear is that he'll pass his poor singing voice on to our daughter.

Lark is confused by the new foal, understandably upset. She asked if I would have loved her more if she'd been a pony, rather than being 'different'. But I couldn't love her more, or less than I already do. She's perfect, and I told her so. This is her sister, and she and Thrush will grow up together, Songbirds both of them.

This resulted in my little Lark trying to teach Thrush to sing. When Thrush instead chose to cry, it frightened Lark so much that she fled back to me, hiding behind my legs. I couldn't help but laugh. The big brave Dragon, frightened by a crying pony.

Sep 29, 890 ANMM

It's been a month since the plague ended. A week after I'd given him the cure, Copper Chain woke up, seemingly as good as new. Even the Equestrian doctors agreed that this was a miraculous full recovery. Soon, they'd spread the cure to the whole town. Meadowlark actually came to comfort me when she found me crying for so long. I had to explain that sometimes, ponies cry because they're happy. I'm not sure she understands, but she seemed relieved to know I wasn't sad anymore. I realize she's only ever seen me sad about Copper, about the plague, but I'm glad she's here to see this. I'm glad she's my daughter.

And so, I make this entry in the tiny moment of peace I have before I start a new journey. I'm wearing the very same armor given to me in Canterlot, waiting to get the signal from the Mayor. Lark is off somewhere being instructed on her duties, and Copper is... waiting.

They told me I'd be nervous, but to be honest, I think I've faced worse. Not much is going to change, to be fair. It's certainly no Changeling Queen, or the wilds of Ostfriesen. I've come so far, and done so much, and somehow, it's all led here. I wish Mum could be here to see it, but I know she'd be proud of me.

Jul 27, 890 ANMM

I cannot explain it, nor shall I try. The Granite Bloom has continued to grow without death or blood, and the flowers have since bloomed as well. I've harvested the flowers carefully and continued to care for the plants, with Meadowlark excitedly helping as well. I'm not sure if she knows why this is so important, or if she simply sensed my own excitement and has been eager to help.

I followed the old recipe precisely, grinding the petals, mixing the leaves. Blessed Thistle, Chamomile, Feverfew, Goldenseal, Granite Bloom, Heart's Desire, Lavendar, Milkweed, Purple Coneflower, Velvetleaf, and Willowbark. I had the brew mixed nearly a week ago, a sweet smelling potion with a golden hue. I sampled it myself, just to ensure it wouldn't poison me, and after several days without side effect, I've given Copper a dose. Already, he's sleeping more soundly than he has in the past four months.

Jul 10, 890 ANMM

Meadowlark was calling for me early this morning. She's excitable sometimes when she finds something new, and I just hoped she hadn't dragged back another 'meal'. That was a long talk after she dragged home her first hunt. The poor dear just didn't understand.

She was up early doing her chores, when she found something that required her to wake me up as soon as she could. Down in the Greenhouse, where I planted the Granite blossom, she found several green buds.

Jun 24, 890 ANMM

Things have gotten easier, and harder in the past few months. Meadowlark has grown quite a bit, and has quickly been learning to speak, as well as to sing, as beautifully as any Songbird ever has. She's strong, frighteningly clever sometimes, and yet so very gentle. She's able to do much of the chores around the house, and is only too glad to do so, as my duties are needed elsewhere.

Copper's condition continues to deteriorate, and much of my time is spent caring for him. The Equestrians have begged me to take better measures to protect myself as well, but at this point, why bother? If I'm going to fall prey to the illness, then so be it. I've met with them and discussed options, even sent back a letter to Princess Celestia through them, but no word has come.

Mar 04, 890 ANMM

I must be insane. I mean, the Dragon is dangerous. I couldn't kill her, but, I don't know. I thought I'd let her go once she was big enough to survive on her own. It's been almost two months, and she doesn't want to go... and I don't want her to go.

I don't know if she's just a pet, or... or something more. It feels like something more. Copper says we're cute together, damn him. The symptoms of the plague are starting to show on him. As grim as it sounds, I think we're just trying to enjoy the time we have left.

Tonight, I was trying to get the dragon to sleep in her bed, but she was being difficult. I sang a song, an old Equestrian lullaby, and she grew still. She watched me, and my heart melted when she began to chirp, trying to speak. Trying to sing along. I suppose I hatched her, she's practically my child, and she's already as much of a Songbird as anypony else in the family. She needs a name.

Jan 10, 890 ANMM

I've been resting. Little else I can do, at this point. I've been physically and mentally exhausted the past few days. Copper's been watching me, even as his illness has progressed. It's the same perservance that Mum had. I wish I was as strong as she'd been.

The dragon sleeps at my side, now, the poor thing. Copper doesn't know what to do with it, but... I've asked him to help feed it. It refused at first, but when I tried, it seemed more than willing to eat from my hoof.

Jan 7, 890 ANMM

I’ve failed. I can’t do it, gods help us all, I just Can’t do it. All this power, this strength, and it’s all for nothing.

After learning about Copper’s illness, I wallowed in that state of uselessness and hatred. There, I finally saw the dark magic in my heart, a strong magic, greater than anything I’ve ever been able to summon as a unicorn. It’s strong, almost addictively so, and I unleashed it. I felt it burn through my eyes as I poured its darkness into the Egg, and in that moment, it began to crack.

I broke through the shell, tearing it apart with the magic. Inside was the focus of all my ire, a tiny dragon, no bigger than a pony foal. It rose up as if from a long nap, unwinding its long, serpentine body. It held up a large head, with great orange eyes which dilated at the new light, and it mewled pitifully. I raised the knife. To save my home. To save Copper. To avenge my Mum.

And I failed. I couldn’t kill the thing. I couldn’t kill this accursed monster, a creature which by all rights was born only to die by my hoof. I dropped the knife as the dark magic faded. My strength faded, and with it my conciousness left me.

Gods, I’m so tired. Even now, I feel weak. The dark magic drained me more than I could ever imagine. I don’t know how long I slept. When I awoke, the little dragon had wrapped her body around my leg, resting it’s head upon my side, sleeping as well.

Jan 6, 890 ANMM

This thrice-damned egg, I'm done with it! I hate it! It has ruined my life! The whole cursed journey was to find this, our only hope, and still, STILL! NOTHING. I don't care anymore. It was all for nothing. Everyone is dying, and it's all my fault. They blame me, I know it. They all held out hope on me, and look what it's got them? More suffering. Well, I'm done. Nothing has worked, but I feel it now. The terror of knowing there is no hope, the pain of the losses I've suffered, knowing how Mum died, seeing Copper begin to fall down that same path! There is Darkness in me. I can feel it, and it burns at my mind.

I can let it out, now. I've done it before. This is the Darkness that destroyed the Changelings in Hive Gorgora and burned away the Owlbear in the Everfree Forest. I can remember how I did it now. This is my power, and with it, I can take whatever I want. I am no longer Death's Hunter. I will BECOME Death. I will shatter this egg and cut the heart from the vile creature within.

Dec 29, 889 ANMM

Why? Why is this happening? Was it all for nothing!?.

Another wave of deaths. Another wave of sickness, those who hadn't been sick have started showing symptoms.

Copper has fallen ill. He says he's just got a cold, but gods damn him, I know the symptoms! I Know them like the back of my hoof at this point!

Nov 9, 889 ANMM

Books on Dragons are surprisingly scarce on actual information. Ponies and dragons simply avoid one another, perhaps for the best, but it means we know almost nothing about them. Hatching a dragon, one book says, requires the egg to be practically cooked in a flame so hot it would burn a pony alive. Another book says that mother dragons use magic when the hatchingling is ready and break open the shells. Yet another says that left alone, eggs only hatch after a century.

Oct 14, 889 ANMM

Tired of waiting for the egg to hatch on its own, I've begun to experiment. I've been as cautious as possible with the egg, but there's something I'm missing here. Is there something unique to dragons that help them hatch their eggs? It had been left abandoned, seemingly. How was it expected to hatch on its own? There must be some kind of trick, something that can be done to hatch it. Some kind of magic?

Sept 24, 889 ANMM

With the town effectively decimated this past year, the fields were left barren after last year's harvest. Were it not for the aid from Princess Celestia, everypony would be dead simply from starvation. They've brought surplus food from Equestria, and no one has gone hungry. Instead, they just wait for death from something worse.

Aug 18, 889 ANMM

It's been a week since I laid Mum to rest, and I've spent the time as busy as possibly. I've finally gotten everything set up, I think. With the help of the Equestrians, as well as Copper Chain, I've spent the time since my return prepping the house for the necessary procedures.

We've dug a new basement, one which will be acting as a Greenhouse, of sorts. Not a traditional one, of course. We dug inside, tilling the dirt and making it suitable for planting. I hung the pure sunlight as a form of artifical light, directly basking over the Granite Bloom seeds. I've planted the Heart's Desire there as well, and should see those start to grow soon. They'll be sheltered from the heat of the Badlands, and the pure sunlight given to me by Celestia will still allow them to grow strong.