gnocchi

no no its fine its not like i wanted to see my bf after two weeks out of the country and leaving for college in two months its okay its not like this summer is pretty much my last chance to see him for more than 2 hours at a time until next summer its okay ! its completely out of my control so i just spend every day sitting around thinking Wow he could be here rn but hes not and now im wasting my summer being sad wishing he was here increasingly conscious of how little time we have left😂

perhaps i am getting my period but i really hope not bc im about to be traveling but i get to go to italy so i genuinely cannot be complaining about anything

im big into just curling up in my heated blanket and crying myself to sleep periodically throughout the day and then waking up and making it worse and then doomscroll and marinate in chud juice and then lose my appetite 🦧

i am happy though

whatever the pills are doing to my brain are making me so tired and have extremely vivid dreams and also removed any joy in eating food☹️ nothing sounds good or tastes good and i can only get half way through a plate of food before becoming nauseous at the thought of eating which is NOT helping the ED allegations from my mom..its genuinely so insane how much of a polar opposite from my other meds like rn im thinking “how could i ever be so hungry and crave so much food that sounds so bad” and when i was on the other meds i was like “im so fucking hungry i cannot fathom restricting in any way how could i ever have such a low appetite “ very interesting indeed

ngl my mom points out some deep purple red scars and asks if theyre new and im like “what😂no not at all these were from a LONG time ago😅😅” and she believes me like wow im a really bad liar but i am so practiced in this particular field of Lying now

im really trying to muster up a deep dark secret bc i havent posted in a long time sorry guys i will find one soon i have to visit my mind palace

i feel like mental hospital relationships platonic or romantic never work but like i met one of my closest friends there in 2022 and we didnt talk for months until i texted him “Hi” on a whim and now we’re genuinely good for each other its interesting how i was able to find such a like minded individual from Newton Massachusetts who does ballet and now hes bestie Peter who snuck out to drive an hour to come to my art exhibition reception❤️ i dont even think about him as my Friend from the Mental Hospital anymore like thats just Peter yk

on my thirty billionth medication over the span of five years and i dont know who i actually am without my brain being fucked to oblivion by chemicals🦧dont worry though, at least im blacking out every time i stand up, super emotional, and gaining weight at unprecedented speed after losing weight at an unprecedented speed! im on meds specifically not do Something but i lowkey still do that something idek why it might just be for the love of the game atp. i call my psychiatrist and she just tosses a new medication at me like im a lost cause😭

my roman empire is the supasoakers account on tiktok (teens singing and dancing in a goodwill) that had a couple viral videos in 2024 there were originally 2 of them, the Dancer (current lead of group) and the Singer and the singer was so fucking good i fucking loved him he was so good guys so funny so talented and he was obviously a theatre kid AND THEN HE WENT OFF TO COLLEGE AND JOINED A CULT AT UCLA AND LEFT SUPA SOAKERS and now its the dancer and the rest of the choir. like genuinely devastating i would look forward to new videos every day i genuinely think i was the biggest supa soaker fan on the planet when he was still there I was OBSESSED COME BACK ASHER LEE THE CULT IS DULLING YOUR NATURAL TALENT AND SASS AND I THINK THEY MADE HIM NOT GAY ANYMORE AND ALSO ITS A CULT

The Rash is spreading…