GlitchGibbli

I’ve noticed, that in the bedroom at night, I don’t actually realize when I’m drifting off.

I no longer think it’s due to tiredness, because even when I’m not particularly tired in the evening, I still don’t notice it happening. However, if I’m tired and lie down briefly in the living room during the day (with intending to fall asleep) images start to appear after a short while.

These images seem to have a life of their own. They appear uninvited and disappear before I can ask what they’re doing there. It feels almost like standing in a doorway. Somewhere in between awake and asleep.

Perhaps it’s because my mind doesn’t associate that location with sleep I see fleeting dream-like impressions while simultaneously realizing that I’m still half-awake. And by "see," I mean actually seeing them, not just visualizing them; normally, when I’m awake and close my eyes, everything is just black.

Can you see your mental images with your eyes closed while you are awake?

When I'm awake, I cannot visualize images in my mind so that I actually see them. If I close my eyes, everything is black. No landscapes. No faces. Nothing. Some call this aphantasia. My conscious imagination has the graphical capabilities of a switched-off monitor. My dreams, meanwhile, seem to run on the latest graphics engine with an unlimited special effects budget.

I’ve always wondered where my dreams come from. Somewhere in my brain, there must be a department that’s responsible for producing them.

When I dream, I don’t watch a movie. I don’t observe myself from the outside. I’m simply there. I see with my eyes. I hear. I feel touch. Even pain. And the surroundings are just as colorfull and real as they are here in the waking state. I can go anywhere and speak to whomever I like. There is absolutely no room to doubt that the world within the dream is real.

Convincing myself that I’m dreaming is difficult when everything insists on looking perfectly real.

I make notes in a dream journal immediately after waking up.

Throughout the day, I try to perform reality checks and engage with the topic as often as possible. To make sure I don't forget, I’ve written a note on the palm of my hand.

For the time being, I would like to avoid harsher methods, such as sleep interruption.

I initially drew three cards.

Card 1: Ace of Swords (Clear opportunity)

Card 2: Hanged Man (Reversed)

Card 3: The Magician (Creative power)

What lies before me here is exactly the plan I had in mind. Moving away from theory and reading countless books, focusing more on practice to regain certain abilities.

I have started writing down dreams again.

Since dreams are very personal, I only publish my full notes on them on glitchgibbli.com. If you can give me a good reason why you would like to read my private logbooks, send me a message. I grant free access to friends, acquaintances, and those with a serious interest. If you don’t want any contact and simply wish to read along quietly, you can sign up for a paid membership there.

My journal contains jumbled notes about even more jumbled dreams. And (hopefully more soon) other exciting experiences.

My aim here is to increase the frequency of my lucid dreams. Ideally, of course, I would like to have them every night.

Can you remember your dreams well? When was the last time you realized you were asleep?

Since I always found it difficult to remember the meaning of individual images, I made lots of little labels and stuck them on the cards.

And I could never decide on just one of so many sets, so I bought trading card sleeves and inserted the matching cards from each set individually into these sleeves.

During my last attempt, I telepathically asked a spirit companion to move the wheel for me.

He refused.

His comments were ultimately more interesting than the experiment itself.

I didn’t learn whether I can move the wheel, but started wondering why I want to move it at all.

1) Rider–Waite Tarot (Pamela Smith)

This was my first one. I gained first experience with this set. However, I never really got into readings with it. I have to admit that I don’t particularly like the drawing style.

2) UFO Tarot (Arturo Picca)

I bought this more for the artwork. I haven’t done many readings with it, but I really love the art style. I even bought the set twice, and a collage of it now hangs as a painting on my dining room wall.

3) Book of Shadows Tarot (Barbara Moore)

I really liked this set because it’s so beautifully colorful and the art style appeals to me. It depicts some everyday scenes, making it a fitting alternative to the old Rider-Waite Tarot for modern times.

4) Dark Grimoire Tarot (Michele Penco)

The wheel didn’t move. But my garden sunshade collapsed instead. Maybe it was an earthquake. Or my psychic powers have terrible aim.

I question reality, and my motivation wanes. Perhaps the wheel secretly dislikes me?

This is intended to be a parallel long-term experiment that I work on from time to time, not with my full focus, but whenever the opportunity arises.

My goals in this experiment:

1) Readings for myself

I do card readings whenever I feel like it and compare them with actual events.

2) Paint my own set

Perhaps I’ll start with a few random cards or maybe just some simple sketches.

3) Readings for others

The full experiment log is available on my my website glitchgibbli.com, here a brief summary:

The psi-wheel barely moved. The interesting part wasn’t the wheel, but the sensation of a shifting attention or warmth. Not quite real heat or pressure, but something that felt tangible enough to move consciously.

I can imagine several ways to spin this wheel without touching it or blowing on it:

the power of thought

energy from one's hands

becoming the wheel itself

or (the path for the lazy) getting spirits to move ii

My goal is not to convince anyone of anything.

I am certainly aware of the criticism behind this, and I do not wish to ignore it. Therefore, I went through all the possible points that came to my mind.

But for example simple rotation, which could easily be confused with other causes, is therefore not enough for me.

I'm starting with an experiment that many who have even a passing interest in the paranormal are probably familiar with: the infamous PSI wheel.

Goal: I want to spin the wheel without touching it, without any external physical influence, and at will, in different ways.

I have a long list of paranormal exercises and experiments that I want to try out. I probably won't manage to get through everything on it, but I would still love to exchange ideas and hear about other exciting concepts.