So I am back in blogging! Lol!
I am just very happy that I get to spend more time with myself, with my husband, with my family - self love.
Everyone knows that I hustle 24/7. I work with different time zones and different clients. I have a full time job and many part time jobs. I am gaining a lot of money, and I get to enjoy my money, and massive savings but I get to the point where I realized that I am building more and more savings accounts but lesser self-love and time for my family. The maximum amount of sleep I get every day is 3 hours. I have naps in between but it's totally different when you sleep at night, with your husband, praying and cuddling before I go to sleep.
I have people working with me but it is not enough. I thought before it was fine to work 24/7 because I don't have a huge responsibility like me having a baby but it is totally different. I lost track of my health, mentally and physically. I don't do the things I normally do before, like journaling, meditating, blogging, etc. I always stay in front of my laptop or iPad finishing things. And what is worse about that, I'll sleep late at night thinking that I still have pending tasks to do. I have planners with me - right now I stick with desk planners, I have people working with me, but me being the POC, it's really hard. I never had time to pamper, I never had time to dress up anymore, to go shopping, play a lot of games, to flop down on the couch/bed after work. I just shower and go straight to sleep.
This was when I knew that something had to change - literally change. Continuing at this pace was not sustainable and could lead to future health complications and regrets. So I decided to slow down and even going for a full stop. So I could spend more time with loved ones and the things that I love. Now I came to the point where I don’t know if I want to continue anymore. It took me a lot of reassessments, the loving clients I am about to give up, opportunities vs me. I chose me. I stayed with a full time job, some part times but doesn’t require a lot of work. The income I am gaining is not the same as before, I lost 25% of it but I don’t care. I focused more on my full time job, I tried looking for part time jobs which doesn’t require a lot of time, pressure, deadlines and such. The one where I work with a certain schedule and the one where I go to sleep fresh and not thinking of work. I carefully thought of everything, from giving up some of my clients, looking for work opportunities with lesser demands, the ones where I can have a work life balance. I lost a lot of money but I started loving my self more and more. My mantra before is that I need hustle and continue providing for myself, my husband and my family. But too much is not good. My health started to decline, specifically my mental health. I started gaining weight and not being healthy anymore. The only time I get to talk with my husband is during night, before we go to sleep even though we are both working from home. Even when I am supposed to be resting, my mind was constantly working and couldn’t stop thinking about what I need to do and finish the next day. I literally had no time for myself, my skin is very dry so my eyes, I was also constantly exhausted - and no amount of rest and nap seemed to do the trick.
And now congratulations self, it’s okay to aim for a financially stable future but I can say that I saved a lot - massive savings and I think that’s enough. I just need to discipline myself when it comes to spending. And I am more than happy now. I have a stable job, some part times, more time for myself, more time with my husband, I can now stick to my old schedule and literally rest after work. At 4pm, I am all done and ready to do whatever I want.
Self care isn’t just about indulging in massages, rewarding yourself after a long day of work (which is mandatory nowadays because the adage “dasurvvvv” is now our forever mantra) and lavishly spending on luxury items. It’s about making sure that you’re paying attention to your mental and daily needs. You can write on your planners and plan the day ahead, write on your journals and paste your install photos for memories, play online games with someone, spending time connecting with friends and loved ones, meditate, etc. It’s all about taking moments to rejuvenate, focus more on your health and re-center. And now I can say that I dasurv a good rest after work, a peaceful sleep and a joyful routine. And guess what? I get to talk different things with my husband instead of showing him a tracker of all the incomes and expenses. He’s more than happy ya’ll!
To my co workers, I hope that you will take care of my clients and enjoy the opportunities I gave to you all. Thank you for being there with me 24/7 and giving you the job full time is something I did not regret.
Andddddd I have more time to create a lot of designs for my planner business! I’m gaining money and at the same time I do what I really love.
Here’s to self-love and spending more time with your family!