i imagine being medicated would feel good as fuck. unfortunately i have to rawdog whatever's wrong with me
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@gingerel
i imagine being medicated would feel good as fuck. unfortunately i have to rawdog whatever's wrong with me

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apologies in advance—
a little bokuaka sketch for my poor soul 😭
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severely deficient in whatever vitamin makes u a person

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never kill yourself. your next mango is closer than you think.
no joke this is the best thing anyone has ever said to me. you just changed my life
once i get taken out back and shot i'll be fine
It feels like dying more often than living right now. I am more coroner than keeper. I am tired of being this way, but there is no other way to be when refusing myself would be damnation.
lone pine poetry, excerpt from Field Note For The Trans Man’s Body
Then let me be your grave keeper, and lay you down to rest. The cemetery is alive with cicada calls and fireflies. I will place flowers at your grave and wait for you to wake to who you are meant to be.
It feels like dying more often than living right now. I am more coroner than keeper. I am tired of being this way, but there is no other way to be when refusing myself would be damnation.
lone pine poetry, excerpt from Field Note For The Trans Man’s Body
don’t take my defeatism too seriously I will always begin again and again no matter what
I might sound miserable most of the time but at my core I’m a very hopeful person

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high functioning depression is so unserious because i constantly feel like choking myself to death with my own hands but. i got laundry to do
andrew minyard is one of the purest cases of "you became the person that would have protected you as a child" i've ever read and it is beautiful and terrible and simple and heartbreaking
Which death is better, mom? The death of your daughter, or the death of your son? One of them is already in the dirt, and the other has escaped. Oh, but I know this already. I was only ever bearable to you when I was suffocating and couldn’t speak back.
lone pine poetry, excerpt from Annotating: I’m Sorry I’ve Been Gone. I Don’t Fucking Feel Real.
I will hide it from you. I won’t speak of it anymore despite my own discomfort. I will become invisible in hopes you might love me again. It is only when you can’t see me clearly that I am given a scrap of love.
lone pine poetry, an annotation from The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka
Happy birthday to my fav girl Tifa <33

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whump is fun because you see a character and are like “i love you so much that i want to see you sobbing and covered in blood. i need you dying in a hospital bed. i need you cold, wet, and miserable. i love you and want you to suffer unimaginable horrors. then you can have a kiss on the head as a treat”
me in 2024: It's not enough to just survive. I want to LIVE
me in 2026: Not driving off the cliff is an act of trying. If you think about it.