Remember that time where I became really intensely reinvested in Catholicism and was making myself miserable by restricting my needs and normal animal behaviours and resigning myself to a life absent of sex and intimacy and leadership all because I wanted to experience the ecstatic joy of the Eucharist and a feeling of purpose beyond my own small life?
and then I got back into roller derby and transed my gender and I stopped feeling the need to go to church. I have a community like I never did at any church, of people who love me for me where I can be myself, and I feel like all this guilt and shame is starting to lift, and I feel like I'm actually part of something rather than just wanting to be part of something



















