.𖥔 ݁ ˖ written by yours truly ; april, twenty, she/her, prod. by suga ! requests are closed. theme by the amazing gorgeous @jktny0 ( mdni )
i'm feelin' so good here with me feelin' so full here with me everything's un-takeable my peace is unbreakable take my heaven for free your words and face don't kill me you know you not a lovable i'm happy where the devils are
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Hiiii. I’m reading taop and it’s sooo good. Why did taehyung look at her hand during the table thing at the start?
!!SPOILERS AHEAD!!!
basically it was because when i was first plotting out the series, taehyung was supposed to know that jungkook was planning on proposing to oc and so he looks at her hand expecting to see a ring or like something but realises there isn’t one there
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summary ༄.° when you and jungkook show up to your much anticipated graduation trip and realise neither of you had the guts to tell your friends about your recent break up, there’s only one thing you can do to keep the trip from falling apart: pretend. but somewhere between fake kisses and real feelings, you start to wonder if letting go was ever the right choice at all.
pairing… jeon jungkook x f!reader
genre/warnings… exes to lovers, fake dating, idiots to lovers, mutual pining, a LOT of angst, fluff, (eventual) explicit sexual content, swearing, alcohol consumption, ft. seokjin, namjoon, hoseok, jimin, taehyung, yoongi + four female ocs, other chapter specific tags
i remember reading this series back when i didn’t even have this blog yet, and it’s still one of my biggest comfort reads. not only is the writing beautiful, but the pacing feels so realistic and patient. and don’t even get me started on the epilogue... i think i reread it three times the first time around because it was just that beautiful. honestly, i wish i could erase this story from my memory just so i could experience it again for the first time. i don’t think i’ve ever read a fake dating trope that i’ve loved as much as this one.
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summary. you and yoongi have been best friends since childhood, and you pride yourselves in knowing everything about each other. well, everything except the quiet, growing warmth neither of you dare to name
pairing: min yoongi x reader
genre: childhood friends to lovers, idiots to lovers (they’re both so oblivious omfg), fluff, angst
word count: 5.5k
warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption, kissing, lmk if i missed anything!
note: it’s my birthday :> i mentioned this in my wip update, but i’m posting this cuz i feel bad that i’m not able to get the jk fic out in time and wanted to give you guys at least something. i wrote this ages ago and only briefly edited it, so it’s probably not amazing loll. likes, comments, reblogs, asks and feedback are really appreciated!! enjoy reading my angels <3
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The sun is way too hot for a Saturday. It’s one of those summer days where everything feels too bright and too loud — ice cream truck music echoing down the street, kids screaming over who’s “it” in tag, and the cicadas loud in the trees.
You sit on the curb in front of your house, legs stretched out so far that your toes are practically cooking on the asphalt. Your thighs are sticking to the concrete, and the back of your shirt is damp with sweat. You’re a little bit miserable, but not really. Because Yoongi’s next to you.
He’s got his usual half-annoyed, half-bored face on, like he can’t believe he let you talk him into running around the neighbourhood all morning.
His knees are scraped — both of them. One of them is still bleeding a little, but he doesn’t seem to care. You care more than he does. You tried to wipe it earlier with your sleeve, and he just grunted like an old man and told you to stop fussing.
Now, he’s eating a blue raspberry popsicle like it betrayed him. Slow bites. Little scowl.
You glance over at him and then back at your own red one. You’ve already got sticky syrup running down your wrist because you keep forgetting to lick the sides.
Yoongi nudges you with his shoulder. “You’re making a mess.”
“So?” You lick your wrist dramatically. “I’m still eating it.”
“That’s gross.”
“You’re gross.”
He doesn’t argue. Just takes another angry chomp out of his popsicle and kicks a pebble with the tip of his shoe.
There’s a comfortable silence for a bit. Not quiet — nothing’s ever quiet in your neighbourhood — but the kind of silence that feels like its own little bubble. Like you and Yoongi have your own world, just the two of you, sitting on the curb with sticky fingers and banged-up legs.
You glance over at him again. He’s squinting into the sun, his dark hair sticking to his forehead, a little piece of popsicle juice on his chin.
You say it without thinking.
“I’m gonna marry you when I grow up.”
Yoongi freezes.
You blink. You weren’t really planning to say that out loud. It just slipped out of your mouth. But now it’s out there, just floating between you like a bubble that’s either going to pop or land.
He turns to look at you slowly, eyes narrowed like he’s trying to figure out if you’re joking.
You’re not. You shrug like it’s no big deal. “I mean, you’re my best friend. You’re funny. Sometimes. And you always give me your pickle slices when we eat burgers. That’s boyfriend stuff.”
He snorts. It’s a weird, sudden little laugh, like he can’t stop it in time. “You’re so weird.”
“You’re weird too.”
“Yeah, but you’re weirder,” he says, but he’s smiling now, and there’s a faint pink blooming on his ears that you don’t notice at the time. You just smile back like you’ve won something.
“So you’re saying yes?” you press.
“I didn’t say that,” he grumbles, and looks away quickly. “You’re gonna forget, anyway. You’ll probably marry some tall idiot who plays guitar or something.”
You kick at his foot. “Nope. It’s you.”
He sighs like he’s got the weight of the world on his tiny shoulders. Then he turns to you and says, “Fine. But only if you stop stealing the last popsicle.”
You hold up your half-melted red one. “Deal.”
And he bumps your shoulder again — lighter this time — and finishes the rest of his popsicle in one bite like a monster.
You don’t know it yet, but this is the moment that will live in the back of his head forever, long after the popsicles are gone.
You just know the sun’s still too hot, the ground is still too hard, and Yoongi’s still here. Right next to you. Where he always is.
You’re laughing again.
It’s loud — too loud for the classroom, and definitely too loud for whatever dumb joke just came out of Hoseok’s mouth. It's probably not even that funny, but you’re leaning over your desk, face buried in your folded arms, shaking with laughter like it’s the greatest thing you’ve ever heard.
You’re wearing that white top again — the one with the fraying sleeves that you play with when you’re thinking. Your hair’s a little messy from gym. There’s a tiny smudge of ink on your cheekbone.
And Yoongi is staring at you.
He doesn’t mean to. His eyes just find you like they always do. Like it’s a reflex.
You throw your head back and laugh harder, and something happens in his chest. Not a big, dramatic boom or anything. It’s smaller than that. Quieter. A weird little flutter, like his ribs just skipped.
He blinks. Looks down at his notebook. It’s blank.
Focus. Come on.
The teacher’s still talking about sentence structure, and Hoseok’s still trying to make you laugh again, and you’re still glowing in that obnoxious, infuriating way that makes it impossible to think.
Yoongi grips his pencil tighter.
You’re just his best friend.
You’ve always been his best friend.
Since the popsicle days and scraped knees and pinky promises made without thinking. Since birthday parties with too much sugar and movie marathons where you fell asleep on his shoulder and drooled on his hoodie.
You’re his person. That’s it.
Right?
He sneaks another glance at you.
You’re trying to stifle your giggles now, hand covering your mouth, shoulders trembling. And Hoseok looks at you like he’s proud of himself, like he wants to make you laugh again. Yoongi wants to tell him to shut up. Wants to drag you out of this classroom, down the hall, outside, anywhere.
Away from everyone else.
Just so he can have you to himself for a little while. Just so he doesn’t have to share.
He swallows.
What the hell.
This isn’t — this isn’t how it's supposed to feel. He’s supposed to roll his eyes when you get like this, not sit here with his heart doing gymnastics over your smile. He’s supposed to find you annoying when you poke him in the ribs during class or call him "Grumpy Yoongi." But instead, he finds himself hoping you’ll do it again.
He looks down at his notebook again. Still blank.
Great.
He tries to tell himself it’s just a phase. A random glitch in the system. You’re still just you. Still loud and stubborn and kind of a disaster. Still his best friend. That hasn’t changed.
He glances at you again — now you’re doodling little stars on the corner of your worksheet, tongue poking out in concentration — and something in him quietly, undeniably shifts.
He turns back to his paper, presses the pencil down too hard, and curses under his breath.
Because he knows.
Even if he doesn’t want to know yet.
Middle school parties are always weird.
Too many kids crammed into someone’s basement, bad pop music echoing off the walls, the lights dimmed just enough to feel scandalous. Someone's older sibling is “supervising” from upstairs but mostly just stealing snacks and pretending they don’t hear anything.
You’re sitting on the floor with a half-melted cupcake in your lap and Yoongi next to you, shoulder grazing yours every few minutes.
There are about ten of you in the circle. Everyone’s either trying to act too cool or trying too hard. You’re somewhere in between — buzzed on sugar and nerves, pretending you don’t feel weird sitting this close to your best friend.
Truth or Dare starts like it always does: harmless. Embarrassing questions. Dares to do a cartwheel or chug a Capri Sun in under ten seconds. You're mostly laughing, swatting at people’s arms when they try to rope you in.
Until Ari — a classmate of yours — grins at you like she’s plotting something.
“Your turn,” she says, eyes flicking to Yoongi. “Truth or dare?”
You toy with the edge of your sleeve. “Dare.”
Her grin widens.
“I dare you to kiss Yoongi.”
There’s a chorus of gasps and dramatic “ooooh”s. The kid next to him starts laughing. Someone else claps like this is the best thing they’ve seen all night.
Your face burns instantly.
You glance at Yoongi. He’s frozen. Stiff. His hands still on his knees, his mouth slightly open like he was mid-breath when the dare landed.
You laugh it off. “Wow. Okay. Real original.”
“Come on,” Ari says, nudging you. “It’s not a big deal.”
“Yeah, it’s just a dare,” someone adds. “It’s not like you guys haven’t known each other since diapers.”
That doesn’t help. If anything, it makes your stomach twist harder.
You look at Yoongi again. He meets your eyes this time, and something flickers.
His expression isn’t teasing. He’s not rolling his eyes or laughing with everyone else. He looks nervous. Careful.
He clears his throat. “Only if you’re okay with it.”
You try to sound casual. “It’s fine. Let’s just get it over with.”
But you can’t stop your heart from racing.
You both shift toward each other, awkwardly, slowly, like two magnets confused about which way they're supposed to go. He’s so close now you can see the way his lashes touch his cheeks, the tiny mole just above his lip, the uncertain way he tilts his head.
Someone counts down, loud and obnoxious. “Three! Two! One!”
You kiss him.
It’s not long. It’s not deep. It’s just a press of lips — barely there, barely breathing.
But it’s soft.
Way softer than you expect.
Yoongi doesn’t move. Doesn’t push forward. Doesn’t pull back. He’s just… there. Warm. Still. His lips are chapped but gentle, and his breath stutters against yours for a half-second before you both pull away like the floor’s about to collapse.
The room explodes. Cheering. Laughing. Someone yells, “They’re in love!”
You grab the cupcake from your lap and toss it at them.
Yoongi stares at the floor. He scratches the back of his neck and mutters something you don’t catch. His ears are red.
You force out a laugh. “You guys are ridiculous.”
But your voice cracks on the end.
He doesn’t meet your eyes for the rest of the game. You pretend not to notice, but you do. You notice everything — how quiet he gets, how he taps his fingers against his knee, how he shifts away from you just a little when someone else sits down on his other side.
And you tell yourself it was nothing.
Just a stupid dare.
Just a game.
You’re lying on your stomach on Yoongi’s bed, chin propped on your hands, staring at your phone like it’s a live grenade. The text is typed out already. It’s stupidly short. Two sentences. Fourteen words. You’ve reread it twenty-seven times.
Yoongi’s next to you, sitting cross-legged with his back against the wall. He’s flipping through the songs on your playlist like it’s the most boring job on earth. His thumb pauses on a song you like and skips it.
You glare at him. “Hey. I like that one.”
“Yeah, and I’ve heard it a million times. Get a new personality.”
You kick at his leg. He dodges without looking.
The light in his room is warm, and the windows are cracked open just enough to let in that late-afternoon breeze. You’re both still in your school uniforms, slightly wrinkled from the day. His tie’s loose. Your shoes are off. It feels normal. Comfortable.
But it doesn’t feel easy anymore.
Your phone screen dims. You tap it back on and sigh, loud and dramatic.
“I think I’m gonna send it.”
Yoongi doesn’t look up. “Send what?”
You roll onto your side so you can face him, and your heart kicks like it’s trying to climb out of your chest. “The text. To— uh— Taehyung.”
Now he looks at you. Blankly. Like you just said something in a different language. “Taehyung?”
“Yeah. From science.”
His expression doesn’t change, but something in his eyes shifts. Slight. Quick. Like a flicker of static.
“You like Taehyung?” he says flatly.
You nod, even though your stomach doesn’t. “I think so. He’s funny. And he smells nice.”
Yoongi snorts. “You’re so shallow.”
“I never said I wasn’t,” you shoot back, but it’s softer than it should be. You’re trying to keep it light. Playful. Like this doesn’t feel wrong already.
There’s a pause.
Then he shrugs and holds out his hand. “Let me see the text.”
You hand it over without meeting his eyes.
He reads it silently. It’s short, awkward, obviously written by someone pretending not to care too much.
hey, i was wondering if you maybe wanna hang out sometime? no pressure lol
He raises an eyebrow. “You used lol. That’s tragic.”
“I panicked!”
“You sound like a robot. A sad, nervous robot.”
You grab a pillow and smack him with it. “Then fix it, genius!”
He laughs — really laughs — and wrestles the pillow away from you like it’s a life-or-death situation. His fingers brush yours in the process.
You still.
It’s barely a touch. Just a moment. But your body reacts like it always does now; your stomach flips; your face burns. And then the guilt rushes in.
You asked him to help you text another guy.
He doesn’t notice. Or pretends not to. He’s busy editing your message, adding a line about how you liked Taehyung’s project on sustainable energy (you did not). Then he adds a smiley face. The old-school kind, with a colon and a parenthesis.
“There. Now you sound like a dork, but at least a sincere one.”
You take the phone back and read it.
hey, i liked your science project btw. wanna hang out sometime? :)
Your thumb hovers over the send button.
You glance at Yoongi.
He’s staring at the ceiling now, one leg bouncing absentmindedly. He looks bored. Normal. Like this doesn’t matter.
You hit send.
It feels like swallowing a rock.
You don’t see him at first.
You’re on the couch, curled into Taehyung like you belong there — knees tucked between his, hand lazily draped over his arm, head thrown back in that kind of laugh you don’t fake. The kind that starts in your chest and takes over your whole body.
Taehyung’s saying something low in your ear, his voice too soft for anyone else to catch. You lean in, partially to hear him better, partially to get closer to him.
Yoongi walks into it like a punch.
He hadn’t planned anything dramatic. He’s holding a plastic bag with snacks — some random things he knows you like — intending to drop by like always. Just show up, sit too close, talk about nothing until the day disappears.
But you’re already laughing. And it’s not at something he said.
He stops halfway into the room.
You still haven’t noticed him.
Taehyung sees first. He looks up and gives a casual, almost smug nod. “Yo, what’s up?”
You turn your head fast, like you’re caught doing something wrong. But your smile doesn't fade. “Hey! You didn’t text me you were coming.”
“I did,” Yoongi says. “Like ten minutes ago.”
You blink. “Oh. Sorry.”
You shift slightly, pulling your legs back, not completely — but just enough that you can pat the spot beside you like nothing’s weird. “Come sit.”
He does. He sits. Of course he does.
He drops the bag on the table and slides into the open space next to you, but it feels exactly like what it is — too late.
The three of you make some awkward, half-hearted small talk. Taehyung says something dumb about your chemistry class and you laugh again — less wild this time, but still bright.
Yoongi forces a smile. It stretches across his face too tight. “Didn’t know this was a thing now.”
“What?” you ask, but your voice has that careful edge to it. You know what he means.
He shrugs, cool and neutral. “You and Taehyung.”
Taehyung answers for you. “It’s not, like, official-official. Yet.”
You laugh under your breath, brushing a piece of hair behind your ear, not looking at Yoongi when you say, “We’re just seeing where it goes.”
Right.
Cool.
Yoongi leans back against the couch and nods like that makes perfect sense. Like it doesn’t feel like someone just hit the mute button on the world around him.
You look happy. And not in a fake, putting-on-a-show kind of way. You’re relaxed. Glowing, even. And Taehyung? He’s just there. Confident. Comfortable. Sitting way too close.
Yoongi swallows it all.
The way your fingers had been resting on Taehyung’s arm like it was nothing. The way you pulled your legs back but didn’t move farther away. The way his name sounds too easy coming out of your mouth.
He laughs dryly at something Taehyung says — he doesn’t even hear what it is.
And he stays. Of course he stays.
Because he’s your best friend.
That’s what he is. That’s what he’s always been.
And if it hurts, if it feels like the room is spinning just slightly off-axis — well.
You don’t need to know that part.
You don’t cry right away.
At first, you just laugh. Too loud. Too sharp. The kind of laugh that feels like it has nowhere else to go.
You sit on the edge of your bed, phone still in your hand, screen black now. The last text from Taehyung stares back at you in your head, branded there like it wants to stay.
“I just don’t think this is working anymore.”
No call. No warning. Just a half-hearted paragraph and a stupid, passive “sorry.”
You set your phone down on your nightstand. It slides a little and stops.
You stare at the wall across from you. It’s the one with the old polaroids and dumb notes and a drawing Yoongi made of you in sixth grade that looks like a potato with hair. You don’t blink. You barely breathe.
The first tear slides out before you even notice it. Just leaks out. Quiet. Like your body knew before your brain caught up.
And then you’re crying.
Not pretty, dramatic crying — the ugly, silent kind where your chest hurts more than your heart and you can’t quite breathe right. Your hands shake. You press your face into the pillow to muffle the sound, and it doesn’t help. You feel like you’re sinking through the bed.
It wasn’t even a long relationship. A few months. A few kisses. Some hand-holding and shared playlists and awkward texts. But Taehyung made you feel seen. Liked. Wanted.
Now you just feel disposable.
There’s a knock on your door, the sound a bit hesitant.
You don’t answer.
It creaks open anyway. You know the sound of his footsteps before he even speaks.
Yoongi.
He doesn’t say anything at first. Just stands in the doorway, taking you in — all curled up and messy and miserable. Then he crosses the room, slowly, like he doesn’t want to startle you.
“Your mom said you weren’t feeling good,” he says softly.
You turn your head, just enough to look at him. Your eyes are puffy. You’re not even trying to hide it.
His brows draw together instantly. “What happened?”
You open your mouth, and it takes two tries before anything comes out.
“Taehyung dumped me,” you mumble.
It sounds small. Childish. Not even worth the weight in your throat. But the look on Yoongi’s face shifts — his whole posture softens, and before you can stop him, he’s sitting beside you.
He doesn’t ask for permission, just reaches out and pulls you into his arms.
You fall into him without hesitation.
It’s warm there — his hoodie smells like detergent and the faintest trace of cinnamon gum. His chin rests on top of your head. His hands stay still on your back, not moving, not rushing you.
And you just let yourself cry.
Not because of Taehyung, not entirely. Not even because of the rejection. It’s all of it. The hurt, the disappointment, the slow-burning truth that you were hoping for something more than what he gave.
Yoongi holds you like he’s done this before in a dream. Like he knows exactly how to steady you without needing words. Like he feels what you feel.
But he’s quiet. Too quiet.
There’s something in the way his fingers curl into your top, in the way he presses his mouth into your hair and doesn’t move for a long time, like he’s clinging to something he’s not allowed to want.
You don’t say anything.
Neither does he.
Eventually, your breathing slows. You wipe your nose on your sleeve and shift in his arms, suddenly aware of how close he is. How good he smells. How warm he feels. And how badly you wish this was something else.
“Thanks,” you murmur, voice hoarse.
He just nods. “Yeah. Always.”
You don’t talk about it again. Not the breakup, not the way you cried into his chest.
And definitely not about how his shirt smelled like you for two days after.
You’re still his favourite person.
That hasn’t changed.
What has changed is everything else.
He still walks you home when it’s late. Still sends you memes at 2 AM. Still saves the red gummy bears for you and pretends it’s not a thing. But it’s not like it used to be — not the same easy closeness, not the same comfort.
You date people now.
Sometimes you talk about them like they’re no big deal. Other times, your eyes light up in a way that makes something twist deep in his stomach.
He listens. He nods. He laughs when he’s supposed to. But underneath all of it, something grows. Slow and impossible and heavy.
Love is a quiet thing, he’s learned. Sometimes it lives in the silences. Sometimes in the way you pass him a drink before he even asks. Sometimes in the fact that you always take the seat next to him, even when there’s room on the other side.
It’s been building in him for years.
Tonight, it almost spills.
You’re both on his bed, legs stretched out, backs against the wall. It’s late — later than you said you’d stay — but neither of you mention it. A movie plays on his laptop, mostly ignored. Some old favorite you’ve both seen a dozen times.
You’re in a hoodie that doesn’t belong to you — his, probably — and your hair’s a mess and your socks don’t match and you look like home.
He can’t remember what the movie’s about. He hasn’t looked at the screen in a while.
You say something, soft and tired, and laugh at your own joke. Your head drops lightly against his shoulder, and he freezes.
You don’t move.
And he doesn’t either.
You just stay like that — your cheek resting against him, your breath slowing, your body slowly going still. You’re warm. He can feel the shape of you through his top, the weight of your trust in the way you lean into him like it’s nothing.
It’s not nothing.
Not to him.
He looks down at you. Your lashes flutter slightly. Your lips are parted. You smell like your shampoo and something sweeter underneath. And he wants to say it.
He almost does.
The words rise in his throat like a wave, a whisper, a fragile truth he’s carried for too long
But he doesn’t say it.
Because you’re tired. Because the timing’s wrong. Because he’s afraid you’ll look at him with surprise , or worse — pity.
So he sits there, still and aching, while the credits roll and your breathing deepens.
You fall asleep on his shoulder.
And Yoongi memorises everything — how your head fits perfectly into the curve of his neck. How your fingers twitch in your sleep. How you murmur something he can’t quite catch and then go quiet again.
He thinks, If this is all I ever get… maybe it’s enough.
But he knows it’s not.
Not really.
You’re drunk.
Not sloppy or reckless, just that warm, loose kind of drunk where the room spins slightly and everything feels a little softer. Someone's phone is plugged into the speakers, playing something moody and bass-heavy. The lights are low. People you barely know are dancing in the kitchen.
You’re on the couch, legs curled up, red solo cup half-empty in your hand. And Yoongi is beside you, same as always.
Except nothing feels the same anymore.
He’s wearing black jeans and a simple, grey t-shirt, dark hair falling slightly into his eyes. His knee brushes yours every time he shifts. You’ve stopped pretending not to notice.
He says something dry — some sarcastic comment about the guy doing shots off a frisbee — and you laugh too loud. You’re tipsy. You’re floating. But your heart’s not light. It’s buzzing. Loud and tense and full of every little thing you’ve been holding back.
You look at him.
Really look at him.
The way his mouth curves slightly when he talks. The way he never quite meets your eyes when you’re this close. The way he smells like laundry and something distinctly him — faint mint, skin-warm cotton, late-night comfort.
It hits you all at once.
You want to kiss him.
Not because someone dared you. Not because you're drunk and stupid. Not even because you can’t stop thinking about that first time years ago. But because you mean it. Because you’ve been meaning it for a long time.
You lean in before you can talk yourself out of it.
Soft. Slow. Hesitant.
Your hand brushes his cheek. His eyes widen — just barely — and then your mouth is on his.
And he doesn’t move.
Not at first.
For a second, he kisses you back. Long enough to make your whole body hum.
But then he pulls away.
Not roughly or dramatically. Just enough. Enough to break your heart a little.
“Hey,” he says, voice too gentle. “You’re drunk.”
You blink, confused. Hurt blooming fast behind your ribs.
“So?”
His jaw tenses. He looks away. “I don’t want you to wake up tomorrow and wish you hadn’t.”
Your chest goes tight. “You think I didn’t mean it?”
He doesn’t answer, and that tells you everything.
You pull back slowly. You don’t say another word.
The rest of the night blurs. Someone turns the music up. You make some excuse about needing air. He drives you home without being asked, hands tense on the wheel the whole time. The silence is too loud between you.
You lean your head against the passenger window, pretending to be asleep before he can try to explain.
You don’t want to hear it.
Because you meant it.
And you thought, for a second, maybe he did too.
It’s been weird for weeks.
Not explosive. Just off.
A slow shift. A stretching silence.
You're still around. Still close enough to touch, to laugh at his jokes, to send dumb videos to in the middle of the night. But there’s something behind your smile now. Something guarded. Distant. And he knows it’s his fault.
You kissed him.
And he pulled away.
Not because he didn’t want it — fuck, he wanted it — but because you were drunk, and he was scared, and it felt too real too fast. So he froze. You backed off. And neither of you brought it up again.
But you’ve both been pulling back ever since.
He doesn’t know how to fix it.
You’re in his room now, sitting on the edge of his bed, tapping your foot, eyes on your phone but not really reading. Yoongi’s at his desk pretending to study. The silence has weight. It presses on the back of his neck.
You exhale through your nose. Not loud, but sharp. Tired.
“Do you even want me around anymore?”
The question hits him like a slap.
He turns slowly in his chair. “What?”
You glance at him. “You act like you don’t care anymore. Like I’m just— I don’t know— there.”
He sits back. His jaw tightens. “I’ve just had a lot going on.”
“Yeah?” you say. “Cool. Same.”
Something in your voice snaps.
He straightens up. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
You stand now, phone forgotten on the bed. Your arms are crossed. “It means I’m tired of pretending everything’s fine when it’s obviously not.”
He doesn’t answer.
“You don’t talk to me like you used to. You barely look at me.”
“I look at you all the time,” he mutters.
You laugh once, the sound sharp and bitter. “Right. When you’re not busy avoiding me.”
He hates this. He hates how defensive he feels, how all the words he wants to say get trapped behind the ones he thinks are safer.
You step closer. Not too close. Just enough for him to feel it. “If you didn’t want me to kiss you, you could’ve just said so. You didn’t have to make it this awkward.”
His throat tightens. “You were drunk.”
“And you made it clear it was a mistake.”
He flinches.
“I get it now,” you say, biting the inside of your cheek. “It was a stupid moment. One I shouldn’t have started.”
His heart is pounding.
You look away like you’re ashamed, like you regret all of it. And maybe you do. Maybe he should’ve let you believe he didn’t feel anything, because that would be easier than this — than hearing you call it a mistake like it meant nothing.
He wants to stop you. Wants to grab your hand, say your name, rewind time.
But he just says, “Yeah. Maybe it was.”
Your mouth opens a little, but you don’t say anything. Just blink, like you’re trying not to show how much that hurt.
You grab your phone. “I should go.”
He doesn’t stop you.
You close the door behind you a little too gently, like slamming it would give away too much.
And Yoongi just sits there, staring at the space you left behind, hating every second of the silence that follows.
Because the kiss wasn’t a mistake.
But letting you believe it was? Might be the biggest one he’s ever made.
You haven’t talked since the fight.
No texts. No “are you home?” No memes.
No Yoongi.
It’s only been a few days, but it feels like weeks — like something’s gone missing in the background of your life. Like you keep reaching for something that isn’t there anymore.
You’ve reread the last texts between you two more times than you’ll admit. The tension. The things you said. The thing you didn’t say.
It’s past midnight when your phone buzzes.
Yoongi [12.36 AM]: Are your parents home?
You stare at the screen, heart suddenly in your throat. You don’t know what propels you to reply, but you do.
You [12.37 AM]: no
Less than ten minutes later, you hear the sound of pounding rain outside.
And then urgent knocking.
You open the front door.
Yoongi is standing there, soaked to the bone. Hair plastered to his forehead, hoodie clinging to him, chest rising and falling like he ran here.
You step aside without saying a word, and he walks in like he’s scared you’ll change your mind if he hesitates.
Water drips onto the floor. He’s breathing heavy. His eyes are locked on yours.
And then he starts talking.
“I didn’t mean what I said. That it was a mistake. I didn’t mean any of it. I was scared. I didn’t want to screw up what we have and I—fuck, I already did, didn’t I?”
You don’t move. You just stare. Let him unravel.
“The kiss wasn’t a mistake,” he says, voice breaking just slightly. “Nothing with you has ever been a mistake.”
You open your mouth to say something, but he doesn’t let you.
“I’ve been trying to stay away because I thought maybe you were better off not knowing. But I can’t do it anymore. Not talking to you is— it's fucking unbearable.”
His eyes meet yours, and he closes the space between you in two steps, pressing his lips to yours.
It’s soaked and breathless and honest — his hands cradling your face like he’s been waiting years for this exact moment and couldn’t risk wasting another second.
You melt into it. Everything inside you aches with how much you missed him.
He pulls back, eyes searching yours, his thumb still brushing your cheek.
“I love you.”
You blink once, before grinning so wide it almost hurts.
“Took you long enough, asshole.”
He laughs, and you kiss him again.
Not because of a dare. Not because you're drunk. Not because you're trying to get over him.
But because you finally don’t have to pretend anymore.
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