gerriroman4real

the fact that i'm no longer the same age as the protagonists of novels and films i once connected to is so heartbreaking. there was a time when I looked forward to turning their age. i did. and i also outgrew them. i continue to age, but they don't; never will. the immortality of fiction is beautiful, but cruel.

Pre redemption Jamie tartt was the funniest bitch alive and I’m tired of pretending he’s not. “Roy, if you’re gonna go to the shower, you should take your sweater off first, pal” is objectively hilarious. “Babe, it’s 2020, women can do anything” in response to keeley not wanting to bid on him? Feminist king. Some welsh newspaper asked him for a quote about a teammate he hangs out with on the reg and he pulled the phrase “jaundiced worm” out of thin air. He hit on bumbercatchs mom (in front of his dad!), probably only because his own stone cold milf was safely in Manchester and it couldn’t be reciprocated. Roy scolds ted about wanting to know if the snacks in the locker room are tasty enough and he just slides in there with “uh…they are not.” A Comedian^(TM)