GEEK IN THE PINK

“I’m just a girl. Not a threat.”

ever since i finished The Last of Us Part II it has been all i could think about. i know that many people have issues with this game, and thats alright! opinions are opinions and i am not here to change yours (thats a lie), im just here to analyze the game from an unbiased perspective. 

this post is LONG overdue, but considering the fact that i could not eat, sleep, or stop crying for around two weeks after finishing the game it made more sense for me to put some distance from the game and this post so that i could detach myself from the characters in order to give an unbiased analysis. i tried to cover as much as possible, but there is quiet a lot and this is already a very long post so i apologize if i missed a few things,

here we go!

The Games Writing

this section is short and gets straight to the point; just because neil didn’t spoon feed you the story that you wanted does not mean that the writing of this game is bad. the writing was well crafted and thought through. if joel’s death upset you, neil’s writing accomplished exactly what it was meant to do; upset you. if he was able to get his point across well enough for you to be this enraged, then his writing is fucking spot on, brilliant, bloody phenomenal. in the end, this is neil’s story, these are his characters and he has every right to do whatever he pleases. for a story to have this much impact on a person would mean that the writing would have to be either god awful or fucking spectacular. all this rage, anger, emptiness and reprisal you are feeling is exactly the rage, anger, emptiness and reprisal ellie has had to go through her entire life. neil wants you to experience the story with these characters. this can be an extremely difficult task, considering we are real and these characters and events are fiction. however, judging by all the “hate” and anger players have been feeling, i’d say the developers of this game have accomplished this task perfectly. so no, the writing is definitely not god awful, it is simply not the perfect happy fantasy you were looking for.

also.. the visuals? fucking phenomenal. seriously this is the BEST looking game i have ever played. that scene where dina finds ellie in the kitchen before she leaves the farmhouse? fucking perfect. seriously, the animations flow so smoothly. dina’s hair, her facial experssions, her small movements and details that they could’ve chosen to leave out but decided to keep in anyway? the developers went above and beyond. say what you want about the game but you CANNOT tell me they didn’t put INSANE amounts of effort into it, they deserve to be praised for this scene ALONE.

Joel’s Death

lets get this out of the way, for everyone saying that joel’s death was “disrespectful”, or treating him as if he was a hero; joel was not a hero. joel was the furthest thing from a hero, he certainly did not deserve to go out in a blaze of glory, thats unrealistic, in both our world and most certainly in the world of the The Last of Us. people do not get to have suspensful or romanticized deaths simply because of the way the world is, people die and are forced to move on if they want to survive, whether you like it or not. there simply isn’t enough time to let death build up and sink in, they do not get that luxury. you don’t get to live as a hero and you most certainly do not get to die as a hero, especially not joel.

joel likely doomed the entire world of a cure because of his selfish acts, killing the fireflies and possibly the last doctor who could save humanity, solely because he had created a bond with ellie. (though, scientifically, creating a vaccine for a fungal infection is useless, and killing the immune host of said fungal infection is the last possible thing you’d want to do. this is information joel most likely wasn’t aware of, yet still chose to save ellie rather than creating a cure. if he was aware of this, him saving ellie would’ve been a good thing since she would’ve survived and would’ve been given another chance to make a proper cure, but since he wasn’t, that only futher proves that he is a selfish dick who saved her for himself. though in reality, his decision didn’t matter, but thats a whole other story). 

joel’s death was not disrespetful to him, it’s exactly what should’ve happened, and it did happen. again, he did not deserve to go out as a hero because he was not a hero. joel letting his guard down to help abby makes perfect sense. after living in jackson, a safe community where life isn’t so bad, for a few years, you are bound to adapt to such a life, especially when its so easy. he has finally been able to settle down after years of survival, joel no longer had a reason to kill every person he came across, he had adapted to this new life and had grown old. the most action he had gotten in the last 5 years were his patrols. other than that, he had been living in a city with giant protective walls, electricity, tons of food, and a caring community, so obviously he would turn soft. if joel hadn’t changed after such a big difference in lifestyle, his character would’ve been 2D and undeveloped. though, to be fair, it did feel like joel was placed right in the hands of abby, but since she was tracking him down and was aware of his whereabouts, it wasn’t too much of a coincidence.

joel’s death was inevitable, sequel or not. even if he was killed to give ellie a story arc, it still made perfect sense. considering all the horrific shit joel has done, it was destined to happen. and even then, if joel wasn’t killed, there would’ve been no motivation for ellie’s rage and built up anger to spill out, it would’ve just been the same game all over again. sure, they could’ve killed dina, but that wouldn’t have been nearly as impactful as joel’s death, we haven’t known dina as long as we’ve known joel. again, the dev’s want us to go through ellie’s pain with her, and that could only be accomplished by killing a character both ellie and the player were highly attached to. the whole point of his death was to anger you, to help you understand ellie’s reasoning behind her mission. his death was there to assist you with seeing things from her perspective and experiencing the struggles just as rough as ellie had to. don’t get me wrong, biased me fucking adores joel with their entire heart, but looking at the story from a distance, joel is really not a good person.

Dina’s Character

adding on to why killing dina wouldn’t be a good idea; dina was added to show ellie’s soft side, to give ellie’s character more depth, rather than just seeing her as a raged woman on a mission to kill. you get to see ellie be vulnerable. heres a quote from halley gross, “we needed somebody who could remind ellie of who she used to be, right? pull that humor out of her, pull that intimacy out of her, pull that hope out of her, continue to be the sort of North Star”. 

dina’s character was there not only to assist ellie and give the player a sidekick, she was there to show ellie’s full character, to give her depth, to remind her of who she is or.. used to be. rather than just seeing her as someone who’s going on a rage mission, you get to experience her full character with the help of dina.

to the people saying dina is ugly..? that’s just… what? she is beautiful, judging people based on their looks is childish and also.. very unnecessary. hating characters because of their looks is.. so stupid, grow the fuck up.

Abby’s Gameplay 

to me, my biggest issue with the game is the sudden shift in character. the pacing of seattle as ellie was really well done (with the exception of looting and exploring). however, suddenly changing to abby and playing as her for a very long time really threw me off. i lost all my weapons, upgrades, training manuals, and had to start right from the beginning.  stealthing as abby was much more difficult. she’s slower but much stronger and buff whereas ellie is faster but more weak and nimble, both of them clearly have different playing styles and it took me a while to get used to playing as abby, but i grew to like her and her storyline either way.  the advertising of the game suggested that this was going to be solely ellie’s story, when it really isn’t. it gives you both ellie and abby’s story, which is a great concept. i wish they had paced it better, switching between ellie and abby every now and then rather than completely shifting gears. they also could’ve made it an entire different game, since abby’s story was definitely long enough. my point is that they could’ve chosen to approach this idea bit better and it is understandable as to why many people did not like playing as abby. 

Homophobia & Transphobia

its honestly sad that the game is even receiving backlash for such a thing. its 2020, lgbt people exist in real life and in video games. their existence does not interfere with your life whatsoever, you are choosing to let it anger you rather than accpeting the fact that we exist and are normal people too. 

ellie and dina’s relationship is portrayed exactly as it would be if it were a straight relationship, they even mention Cat, ellie’s ex (?), at the start of the game without making it a big deal, which i think is fucking amazing. to finally see lgbt characters in a game that aren’t made a big deal out of? to finally feel as though it is normal to see lgbt characters in video games? its truly amazing. ellie is a lesbian, dina is bisexual, they exist, WE exist, and this game showcases that perfectly.

as of lev being transgender? i can see why people may be upset about the way they tackled that. i myself am not transgender, so i dont really have a say in this. however, i am non binary and i do struggle in ways when it comes to gender. i believe they tackled this quite well, showing lev being kicked out for his identity going against the seraphites’ religion, being deadnamed, and so on. it shows the struggles that trans people have to go through and what it is like to experience such things, which i think is important to include. but again, i’m not trans so i dont think my opinion on this is valid.

hating on the game for including lgbt characters simply to show that they exist automatically makes you a piece of shit. if you do not like this game solely because the main character is a lesbian, your opinion on this game does not matter.

The Theme of the Story

some people may argue that the stories message is as simple as “revenge is stinky dont do it >:(”, but it is honestly so much more than that. the game doesn’t just spoon feed you the idea that revenge is bad, it throws you into a devastating walkthrough of all the struggles and consequences that come with the journey of revenge. not only does it have a drastic effect on the person seeking revenge, it impacts and hurts the people around you just as much, if not more, bringing death and destruction with it.

as we’ve all seen, joel is brutally tortued by abby and is killed right in front of ellie, fueling her anger and causing her to go on her revenge mission to kill abby and everyone involved in his death. as i said before, his death was meant to anger you just as much as it did ellie in order to put into perspective her struggles, it left me wanting to kill everyone alongside ellie, too. this results in dina getting her skull bashed into the pavement whilst also suffering from an arrow wound all while being pregnant, jesse’s death, and tommy with permanent damage from an arrow and bullet wound. not to mention, ellie gets beat to shit and is left with a broken arm.

abby ends up losing owen, mel, alice, nora, manny, jordan and leah after killing joel.

both abby and ellie end up losing the ones they loved, all because they decided to venture down the path of revenge. revenge will only result in death, pain, loss, struggle, and so much more until the cycle is finally broken.

The Ending

in the end, both abby and ellie suffer, they are both the same, they lost a loved one and went down the path of revenge, only to lose even more loved ones until finally realizing that revenge is useless. after joel’s death, ellie had stooped down to abby’s level, the only difference between the two is that abby was able to move on, but ellie couldn’t. (a point i forgot to make; abby mostly got away with revenge, she was able to kill joel, making it easier for her to move on, as we see in their last fight scene. however, ellie never actually got to finish the job, she was never able to get closure, unlike abby, which made it much harder for her to move on. so really, they didn’t go down the exact same path. i believe this was done to show the severity of revenge and the different paths that come with it. so they aren’t entirely the same. i dunno, just thought i’d add this in!)

ellie believed that this is what she needs; to kill abby. she believed that once abby was gone she’d finally get closure. however, in her fight with abby, she realizes that this cycle of revenge is completely useless. joel is dead, killing abby will not bring him back and will definitely not make things better for her, this results in her letting abby go.

many people are mad about the fact that ellie did not end up killing abby, that it was all of that for nothing. yes, that is the whole point, all of that WAS for nothing. you do not win in the game of revenge, ever. if anything, ellie letting abby live was a good thing, it showed that ellie has finally moved on, she’s finally realized that killing abby will not bring joel back nor would it solve her problems. her character developed, she had changed. 

revenge does not result in anything but pain, loss, and death. it is vicious. unfortunately, ellie lets revenge consume her and only realizes this once its too late. ellie’s cycle of revenge is what resulted in her biggest fear coming true; being alone. she loses jesse, dina, JJ, and her only remaning connection to joel, her ability to play guitar. she even losers herself, who she used to be.

(while i dont believe dina really left her since there are quite a lot of fingers pointing towards that theory, i’ll still use that as an example to prove my point).

by the end of the game, ellie is not supposed to be likeable. she was an asshole, leaving her family because she believed that abby was more important? dick move right there. this game is supposed to make you feel dissatisfied, hurt, empty, blah blah blah. the entire point of the ending is to give you a taste of what the cycle of revenge is like.

this is beautiful storytelling, just because it did not go down the path you wanted it to does not make it “bad writing.” you do not come to the games of The Last of Us for a happy ending. these stories are brutal and horrfic, if you expected the ending to be happy then that’s on you for not taking the hint.

there is so much more i want to say about this game, i could talk about it for days and never get bored of it, but i feel like this is a good place to stop since this is already very long. this game is fucking phenomenal, it ripped my heart out of my chest and curb stomped it. i hope this was somewhat understandable! i highly doubt anyone has gotten this far but if you have hi! thank you for reading!! i really appreicate it <3

I played and finished The Last Of Us Part II last week and it has been on my mind ever since. I obviously understand that a lot of people have problems with this game, and that’s okay. I’m not here to change anyone’s views on the game or anything, I just want to kind of write down my opinions and takeaways as, again, it’s been on my mind since finishing it lol. Nobody may see this and this will mean nothing, that’s fine. 

Anyway, this post will contain SPOILERS

My Overall Thoughts

I’m not entirely sure how to structure this so I guess I’ll just start with a broad statement lol; I loved The Last Of Us Part II. In my opinion, it’s a beautiful and well-crafted story about loss, grief and consequences, with how each of these things affect different people. 

Discussion 

From what I’ve seen, I see a lot of people hating on this game for its handling of Joel and the decision to have the player play as Joel’s murderer, Abby. I’ve also seen a lot of people say that the message is as simple and plain as “viOleNcE iS bAd”, but I personally think it’s so much more than that.

The Last Of Us Part II doesn’t just tell you that violence is bad, but it shows you the ramifications of it by dealing with the emotional toll as well as the consequences on not just the main person involved, but their loved ones too.

As we all know, at the start of the game, Joel is brutally killed by Abby and we go with Ellie on a mission to avenge him by killing everybody involved. We see it all from Ellie’s point of view, hardheartedly seeing Abby as the villain as she just killed the character that we know and love as we have an emotional connection to him after the first game. His death is supposed to make you feel angered. It’s not like you’re supposed to be joyed by it. His death scene left me feeling empty and sick, wanting revenge alongside Ellie. 

However, as the game goes on, we start to see the story from Abby’s point of view. We learn that the doctor that you, the player, had to murder at the end of The Last of Us is actually the father of Abby. This is brilliant. Now we see one of the main themes of the story, consequences, and I was immediately on board. Joel is not a good person, at all. He murdered hundreds of Fireflies and took away the possible cure for humanity for his own personal reasons. This is incredibly selfish, even going to the lengths of lying to Ellie about the events as he knows that it isn’t what she would want. Technically, Joel is the villain.

Joel had been through so much, so you may think it’s justified. But the point is, Joel isn’t the only person in the world of The Last of Us. Everybody he murders aren’t just mindless NPCs, they are people. People with their own problems who have gone through their own share of pain and loss, people with their own loved ones. Such as the doctor, who had Abby, whom he loved very much and Abby the same. So, understandably, she would feel incredibly angry and feel the need for revenge, just the same as Ellie and the player after Joel’s death.

There is now a cycle of revenge. Ellie goes on to kill Abby’s friends, and so Abby tries to kill Ellie and her friends. It’s not until Lev talks Abby out of it that the cycle seems to have been “broken”. Abby and Lev put it behind them, however, Ellie cannot and nor can Tommy, which means that the cycle is not broken. Ellie continues her hunt for revenge, thinking it’s still what she needs. Just as she’s about to murder Abby, she sees it’s completely useless.

Here I’m going to talk about another core theme of the story: loss. As Ellie is about to kill Abby, she realises that Joel is gone. Completely gone, and killing Abby is not going to change that. She now has Lev, and if Ellie was to kill Abby, Lev would only lose Abby, leaving him in the same situation Ellie was in at the start of the game, which in turn means Ellie is becoming what she set out to kill. It’s no use. Revenge only causes more pain and loss. This cycle is so vicious and nobody wins, and Abby realised this once she found Lev, and found that revenge is a futile thing that does not achieve anything, especially not bringing back her dead friends. She managed to break the cycle herself, and in turn, she found a life worth living, a live with Lev. However, Ellie could not manage this, choosing to still seek revenge.

Because of this, she faces the consequences. She loses all of her loved ones. She loses Dina, she loses Jesse and she loses her baby son, JJ. Tommy is the same too. Tommy couldn’t break the cycle, and he loses his wife, Maria. And guess what, Joel is still gone. All of that loss, yet Joel is still dead. It’s all been for nothing. Ellie is now completely alone, which is what she said she was scared of in the first game, all because of revenge. The way forward is not anger, rage or revenge, but acceptance and love. That’s my takeaway.

You may think this treatment of Joel and Ellie is “disrespectful”, but I disagree. In the first game, you do a lot of bad things as these characters. Yeah, you go through a lot of pain, but so has everybody else, yet they still face the unfavorable consequences. It only makes sense that Joel and Ellie would too. In my opinion, this only helps to build the world of The Last of Us and show that just because Joel and Ellie are the main characters, they aren’t invincible, and the world doesn’t revolve around them. They just happen to be two people who live in the world amongst so many others, which for me, makes it so much more realistic. This is emphasised in the incredible detail in the gameplay of each enemy having names, with other enemies interacting with eachother as you stalk them. It makes them feel so much more real and only increased my enjoyability.

From a story like this, which is so dark and gritty, I don’t expect a happy ending. You’re not supposed to like Ellie by the end of this story, as she serves as the example of why the cycle of revenge is horrible. You’re not supposed to feel satisfied by it, you’re supposed to feel empty, hurt and sad. That is literally the point. 

You have to realise that The Last Of Us is a piece of artistic storytelling told and made by artists. It would have been so easy for Neil Druckmann to write a boring and two-dimensional story to appease players and make bank. But he didn’t. He chose to craft an intricate, heavy and creative direction for his material, and I hugely respect that. At the end of the day, he doesn’t owe you anything. This is his story, and these are his characters, he can do what he wants with them. If you don’t like his creative vision, then great! You don’t have to. If you don’t like something, just don’t play/watch/read it. If you loved the first game but hated the second, then just pretend it doesn’t exist and come up with your own fanfiction for these characters, it probably wouldn’t have been as good as this.

A lot of people blame “bad writing” when they don’t like something. There’s a difference between feeling bad about something than it being bad writing, you know. Just because it wasn’t what you wanted, doesn’t mean the writing is bad. By you feeling angry about Joel dying, Neil Druckmann’s writing has accomplished its objective. And I’m not trying to say that everybody who doesn’t like this game didn’t like it because their fanfiction didn’t come true. You cannot like this game solely because you don’t like the direction it took, and that’s fine. Because again, this story is a piece of artistic storytelling, and art is subjective.

This entire post is just my opinion. I personally loved this story and these characters, and it was exactly what I wanted to get out of this game. Everything about the game I just adored. I loved the plot, the writing, the characters, the gameplay, the music, the visuals, the performances - everything. And if you didn’t, then great. That’s your opinion. It just hurts me to see so many people dismissing the incredible things achieved in this game solely because of one plot point. I don’t know. As I said, I’m not trying to change your opinion or anything, I just thought I’d share mine.

We’re talking away. I don’t know what I’m to say, I’ll say it anyway. Today’s another day to find you shying away. I’ll be coming for your love, okay?

If somehow the Lord gave me a second chance at that moment, I would do it all over again.

Pepperony Week 2020:

↳ day 3: quotes/lyrics

Avengers AU - If Tony was Peter’s biological father

Tony is super protective of his son. And Peter, inspired by his dad, becomes Spiderman anyway (his dad and his Uncle Rhodey figure him out in a second though).

Hi everyone!!  I’m here with more recs!

H&C = platonic/father and son relationship H/C = romantic

Our Indoor Voices by jerry_duty; G (H/C)  - canon compliant; Connor talks loudly. Hank caffeinates. - This fic is so funny!  Hank and Connor’s characters are so well done!

more than anything by @starrdustdreaming ; T (H/C) - post canon, wip; But he still does, still lets himself indulge in fleeting touches and short hugs. Long nights spent pretending that the feeling of Hank’s embrace, the small spark bought on by a brush of hands, doesn’t mean anything. Despite the fact that he knows. He knows what it means when Markus describes what it’s like with North and all Connor can think is Hank Hank Hank. This is the one thing Hank doesn’t know and never will. That he’s in love. - This fic is beautiful!!

The B Word by @starrdustdreaming; T (H/C) - post canon; Connor and Hank call each other boyfriend!  This fic is adorable!  I didn’t even realize it was written by the same author until I typed this up!  Great stuff <3

Rub a Dub Dub, Two Men in a Tub by edelweissroses; T (H/C) - post canon; Sumo makes a mess, and Hank and Connor take a bath together alsdkfjla;sdk  This fic is hilarious and cute!!

Epitaph by @burn-gormans-eyelashes; Not Rated but I’d give it T (H/C) - post canon, MCD; Connor waits at Hank’s grave.  This fic is very dark, but very good!

no sign of yesterday by @kindasunday; M (H/C) - canon divergence; A rewriting of the roof scene.  Also very dark, but very well written!