at the brick house, tear it all down

more specifically, the Two People he had a crush on: Benjamin and Abigail.

so, quick summary of these two.

Benjamin (Benji): has been friends with Rainer since 4th grade. big science and philosophy nerd. was one of the people present when Rainer got hit by a car, and was the one who went to call an ambulance (and Jill + Thomas). got into coding in high school.

Abigail (Abi): was the "new kid" in 6th grade. was the one who approached Rainer and Gabriel first. trans woman; came out in the summer before 11th grade. was definitely the artist of the three; Rainer used to say she reminded him of Mike. still knows a bit of coding. was also present the day Rainer got hit by a car; they had been playing basketball, the ball slipped out of her hands and into the road, and Rainer went to get it. some days she still thinks it was her fault, no matter how much Rainer tells her it wasn't.

now, fun facts!

Pre-Mike's Death:

Abigail helped, along with some others, to make pretty much 90% of what's seen in Even Care. Benji helped Rainer and some others with coding.

most of the coding was usually done in Benji's garage, sometimes Anna and Marvin's, depending. usually Benji's, though. due to Jill and Thomas' work schedules being pretty inconsistent during this period, this meant they wouldn't be able to pick Rainer up to bring him home sometimes. she used to ask Marvin to, but Benji kinda noticed that Rainer fucking hated that, so he eventually offered to do it himself (also made a big deal out of it right in front of Marvin, like "Oh no Mr. Mark, I can see this is such a huge fucking inconvenience to you, so I'm more than happy to do this :)")

the entire Garalina Crew has gotten together to smoke weed before. Rainer included. several times, actually.

Benji, having his own past with an abusive parent, could kinda tell that Something happened between Rainer and Marvin, but he doesn't want to just outright ask about it. as he put it to Abi once, "I just know he did something to him. I just can't prove it."

Abi just kinda went 🤨 when Rainer started going by that name. also went "hey, you can tell me anything, y'know?" Which Could Mean Nothing.

the entire Garalina Crew loved Mike. he was a little sweetheart. he and Abi used to draw together a lot. same situation with Carrie, on the rarer occasions they saw her.

no one in the Garalina Crew liked Marvin. he was just an asshole to everyone there in general.

Post-Mike's Death, Pre-Rainer's Disappearance:

this is when the Crew dissolved. Rainer stopped really talking to anyone. Benji and Abi got Really worried, but just assumed he needed space. they'd send him emails once a week to check in. sometimes it'd take a couple of days, but he'd respond eventually.

and then. 1997 happened. Care went missing in June, and Rainer was torn up about it. They Rather Swiftly Got The News That Rainer Tried To Kill Himself On Christmas. they checked in on him (by paying him a visit) pretty soon after he got home.

Benji punched a guy who called Rainer a "schizo" once (derogatorily, not in an "ignorant/genuinely trying, but doesn't have the right language" way).

Rainer was still distant, but Benji and Abi tried staying in touch.

fun fact! on the night Rainer "disappeared" (read: Decided To Let A Car Hit And Kill Him), he actually considered just. going to stay at Benji's apartment and just Breaking Down and telling someone, someone he believed wouldn't judge him or assume he's lying. Rainer Didn't Do That Though.

After Rainer's Death:

Benji and Abi keep in touch. Rainer disappearing deeply fucked them up.

Abi went on to write And illustrate children's books. she has a semi-reoccurring character named "Raindrop," a red bird who isn't able to fly and seems to walk with a limp (< she's trying not to be too obvious)

Benji codes little games here and there, but he's working on a bigger game, semi-sorta based on Petscop. the main character (a visibly disabled dog) is based on Rainer, but Benji would never admit it. as a main job, he works in an office.

Benji and Abi get together to smoke weed on Rainer's birthday. they just talk, sometimes they call Jill and Thomas to check in on them.

Benji has a slight alcoholism problem, and he tries to pretend it isn't one. Marvin doesn't drink often, but when he does, he usually ends up finding Benji there at the bar as well. Marvin usually tries to casually start conversations with him, or just talk at him. depending on his mood, Benji either stays silent while glaring at him the whole time, or he'll tell him to fuck off and leave him alone.

Benji has this sinking feeling that Marvin knows more about what happened to Rainer than he'd admit, and perhaps is even responsible for whatever happened. but it's the same situation as before when he suspected abuse. he just can't prove it.

anyway. these two are technically background characters, but they make me sad because. they could only watch as their best friend (and crush) spiraled mentally, and there was nothing they could do. technically they could've tried getting Rainer to open up, but...they knew it probably wouldn't have happened. doesn't mean they don't regret it, not trying.

no, it's the implications of CSA.

like. let me lay out the things where i'm like "oh. oh that certainly has Implications, and not Good Ones, either"

among some of the first bits of darker imagery we get in Petscop: a girl is in a shed, crying. her head is connected to a daisy, with the option to pluck petals from it, as though you're playing "loves me, loves me not." a discordant piano note plays when you pick a petal (ignoring any connections to Marvin because Piano And Music, at the very least this indicates that what's happening is Bad). once the petals have all been plucked, it ends on "loves me not." the girl is now glitchy, red, and distorted, and clearly seems to be in more distress than she was previously.

"You’re in the bathtub thinking about her" yeah there's. there's not a lot of explanations for what the fuck that means. even if we're going with a Charitable explanation, this still paints Marvin as being Weird As Fuck. especially since the character being referenced right before this line was CARE. HIS YOUNG DAUGHTER.

now, keep in mind that i'm basing this after research i've done plus what i've heard in general, but. at least from my understanding, sexual abuse can leave the victim feeling as though they are tainted or unlovable afterwards (among other feelings), and what's one of the first phrases typically associated with Care? "Nobody loves me."

also, kinda related to the point above, but also something i thought of: Casket 1 (The Vase). like, i interpret the event described in Casket 1's description as being very literal, that it's something Marvin did to Care. but considering the line "nobody wants to see you like this" coming from Marvin, plus the yellow daisy in the vase, like...idk. But My Brain's Connecting Some Things Together

something something dissociation (a possible consequence of trauma), and it sometimes being confused with "zoning out"/"letting your mind wander." something something "stop wandering and come home." something something Care often being described as confused and "dizzy." something something The School, where Care(/Paul) was abused, being a disorienting, difficult to navigate place with a foreboding atmosphere.

one of the reasons why i focus on those themes So Heavily in my own interpretation is because 1) i don't think CSA is discussed/explored (respectfully) Enough in media, actually, so i want to do it, and 2) it was one of those things that, when pointed out to me, i couldn't unsee.

a major part of my Petscop interpretation is the theme of child abuse, its effects on the victims, and how those victims heal and cope with the aftermath of their trauma.

Rainer is an angry, vengeful young adult who never really received help for his trauma, and, even worse, Still Had His Abuser In His Life For The Rest Of It. he never got the chance to move on and heal from any of it, and it effectively ate him alive. also, he's not a "perfect victim" by any stretch of the imagination, and even continued the cycle of abuse himself, but one of the main things i try to convey is that while Rainer was certainly a fucked up guy who still hurt people, and Belle does not have to forgive him by any means (and they don't forgive), Rainer was still someone who deserved a chance to heal and move on.

Belle (though they aren't a victim of CSA in my interpretation) is someone who feels as though they have to "put on a brave face" after their abuse, and who struggles with their identity to a degree, as well as struggling with self-esteem issues. they feel the need to protect Paul, even at the cost of their own well-being. their story (though i haven't shown most of it yet) is about them realizing that they don't have to be strong all of the time, that they're a wonderful person deserving of love and respect, and that they don't always need to be the one who does the protecting.

Paul, the current host of a system, was left with horrible memory problems and confusion in the aftermath of his abuse, and it was still really bad even years later. he remembers almost nothing about his childhood, much less his trauma, and it's made even worse by the fact that he's still being preyed on By His Abuser. his story revolves around him uncovering this trauma and coming to terms with it, giving him the ability to finally be able to actually heal.

i dunno it's just. something i've been thinking about. i think there isn't a lot of media that actually. explores themes like CSA and the impact it has. while Petscop doesn't focus that much on it, at the very least the implications are there, and i want to actually go in depth about it!

how was being treated more like a Thing than a person with feelings something that would impact how Rainer sees himself? how would abuse like that, something that impacted Rainer extremely negatively, impact his view on trauma and someone's ability to heal from it, or even how trauma effectively changes you into a different person? how would Rainer's abuse being similar to Care’s impact his emotions about what happened to her?

how would Paul handle seeing visuals relating to his own trauma? how would the various Alters react to it? which parts of Paul's reactions are denial, and which are genuinely him not remembering? which sections are Paul, and which are other alters fronting? if Paul's reaction Is denial, then what and why is he denying? when in the series did Paul realize who Exactly Marvin is? when did everything "click" for Paul, about what Petscop was telling him?

i hope this is coherent. just some thoughts i've been having about Petscop. hope you've been doing well!

I feel like the implication of CSA in relation to Petscop can be a touchy subject to some, but I think it’s perfect reasonable to read it that way. It’s understandable that people might not want to explore such subjects, but as a victim of CSA myself I do see a lot of myself in Petscop and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with seeing it that way. Personally it feels perfectly logical to make and explore that assumption, and I do wish more people would explore the subject more within Petscop.