POSE STUDY 01 | “LET GO”

I have been very MIA lately because I've been rotating my finances up and down repeatedly without seeing much of a light at the end of the tunnel. As most of you who've been following me for a while probably know, I've been on a journey to get top surgery for some time now - stuck to all the rules, jumped through all the hoops, and in the end it's now all happening much sooner than I expected or planned for - which on the one hand means, yay, but on the other, I'm not financially ready at all. I truly am thankful to all who supported me with commissions this year, because everything I earned went into dedicated savings, that now at least will cover my travel expenses and a downpayment for the surgery. But everything else is up in the air and my insurance will only cover about half of it all, if I'm lucky.

I really didn't wanna do this and was hoping to be able to finance it all through commissions and hard work alone, but it just wasn't enough. My family can't support me financially either, and I'm terrified of taking out a loan because I'm turning over every cent thrice to begin with already.

No matter if you can only share or if you can help with a donation, any support is greatly appreciated!

If you have questions or concerns, don't hesitate to reach out. I can provide proof and documentation (just don't wanna throw that out into the internet just like that XD)

I know tumblr isn't *the* platform for fundraising concerns, but it's where to this day I have my biggest following, and I do hope one or two or three of you will share this to the right people and the right circles and yeah xD If my schedule wasn't utterly plastered for the entirety of August and September I'd love to offer sth in return for each donation, but I physically can't do that at the moment and don't wanna make promises I can't keep.

#pest (/affectionate)

ooc:: choom you nailed it on the head!! 😭 Art has heard it all. "His face is a masterpiece", and that's the cruelest joke the universe ever played on him. People see the sharp cheekbones, the androgynous perfection, eyes that seem to hold entire galaxies... and they stop looking. They assume they've found everything there is to find about him. He's learnt to use it as armor, this beautiful facade that keeps the world at a safe distance. They project their desires onto him, their fantasies, their hunger, their envy, their judgement and he lets them. It's easier than explaining that the person they're gazing at is the one he performs, not the one he is. That he is still human. The mask protects him from being truly known. Because being truly known would mean exposing the mess underneath and who has time for that when the cameras are always rolling? So he keeps it on. Smiles. Tilts his head at the perfect angle. Gives them the image they came for.

EN EL GARAJE V: Quit doin' that boring work shit 'n give me all yer attention, Reyes.

5 AM Acid house production