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last night i had paralysis, and then i had a nightmare thati was in a horrible maze of oriental specialty shelves with rude malicious cosplayers bumping into me, and then w were on the metro going home when the next train car exploded into flames, spreading to our car, and i looked down to the drawing i had made and on the back it said "god loves to do it to people with great lives"

the other night i had a wonderful dream that i ran away to the dream version of mount royal to sniff coke with my gentle, sweet boyfried who didnt really care what i wanted. he drove a clean white car.

girlpatches-deactivated20250530

ive been having a lot of crises lately

reverse pupal stage

right now, in my wholeness and having-of-appendages-ness, i am immature. i am stagnant because i have 10 fingers and toes. i dont think i will ever get anywhere having these useless fucking things. if i had infinite money and a personal surgeon, i would:

get rid of tongue (too bothersome and self-aware)

get rid of left an d right pinky toes

get rid of left and right pinky fingers

navel removement

cloaca installment

get rid of right eye

replace my clioris with a metal replica and install usb plug in righgt thigh and have seizure inducing botgasms

i forgor

(pt 1)

kak para pladochetiy

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

i am hot with pain. god damn stupid medication is like feeling the glare from behind black cloth. im still miserable, im shakey and i cant read. i believe you are evil and were designed for evil, and having no mind of your own, evil is all you will ever be. in a perfect world, we all let ourselves feel this pain, celebrate it, for it never fails to warn of injury, it keeps us resting when we need to rest, and its leave is so wonderfully freeing. im tired. i cry because i hate the idea that my sober body is condemned to sadness. i hate you, you are not enabling, you are all the comfort of a lie.

daily affirmations

you are ok

its nott necrosing

you dont have serotonin syndrome

nobody is thinking about you

its just swollen its not necrosing

dont drink

its not gangrene either

when i was 13, i started prozac at such a low dose that i had to take it in liquid form. eventually, it amde me so stuped that i couldnt readf or do math, and i had an exam coming bup so i had no choice but to quitv cold turkey. for 7 nights i had horrible horrible nightmares, and one o f them was that i birthed a little deformed fetus on my way home from school, which happened to be a cheeto with big, shiny bulging beady eyes. i ate him, his eyres poppe in my moutrh and it was so awful that the shame , and the sensation, lingered into the coming days. i still think about the little guy some times. attached is my rendition of him done faithfully in ms paint.

#i cant name him because i wpuld get attached

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