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KEEP TALKING, PROFESSOR!
SUMMARY: sucking off Professor Riddle while he's talking to a student. that's the summary. have fun. ;)
WARNINGS: MATURE CONTENT. nasty nasty stuff. messy blowjob. exhibitionism, rough oral m!receiving, teasing, slight dumbification, he watches you in the mirror, choking on it, MESSY blowjob again bc I MEAN it, wtf is wrong with me genuinely, reader LOVES gagging on it, cumming in mouth, face slapping, cockwarming
AUTHOR'S NOTE: sometimes I question my sanity while writing these. then I get horny. then I remember yall love me. then, I hit the post button.
wordcount: 3,1k
Your knees ache, dark bruises blooming beneath the thin skin above your joints as you scrape against the rough, worn-down wooden panels of his study. You`ve been here for no more than twenty minutesânot wasting time with unnecessary talking before you sank to your knees and crawled underneath his desk, eager fingers fumbling with the metal of his belt.
Whatever this is between you twoâit has shifted into something more than originally intended.
Just once, he said. One time, to improve your gradeâhe'd sworn to it. To himself more than to you. But one time didn't just stay one time. After two weeks of trying to convince himself he didn't crave you as much as you craved him, his resolve finally shattered.
That very day, he ordered you to stay behind after class ended, and not two minutes later, you were bent over his desk at the front of the classroom, skirt bunched around your waist, his fingers digging into your hips with a bruising grip as his cock slid inside you with one ruthless thrust.
Since that moment, visits in his study have become rather routine than exceptionâat first, every two weeks. Now, you visit him nearly every dayâlate at night, when the girls in your dorm are soundly asleep, you slip from beneath the soft warmth of your duvet, cover your pyjamas with your robes, and hurry down the dark, eerily quiet corridors until you reach his study.
Just one issue todayâyou've been invited to a birthday party of one of your friends after dinner, and you couldn't possibly miss out on that just for the sake of your secret rendezvous with your professor.
However, after seeing him in class earlier today, his new suit fit his beautifully sculptured body to perfectionâyou couldn't resist. Your thighs pressed together beneath the surface of your desk, and for the rest of your lesson, the only thing on your mind was his pretty cock stuffing you full.
Needless to say, you've been aching for him the rest of the day, and when classes finally ended, you did not even bother returning to your own dorm. Instead, you looked to your left and right before taking the corner leading to the professor's residences and, with four brief knocksâas you agreed uponâannounced your presence.
The door flung open with the help of a wandless spell muttered by him, not bothering to interrupt his work for your sake.
Tom knew what you came here for. Knew it the second your gaze lingered on him for too long during class, watched as your thighs clenched together whenever he so much as looked in your direction.
Needy girl.
For you to come here earlier than usual was no surprise. For you to sink to your knees before even speaking a single word wasn't either. So, he lets you do as you please without speaking a word as he continues correcting essays.
The first sound you earn from him is when you work his zipper open and free his already semi-hard cock from the confinement of his trousers, eagerly wrapping your hand around his girthy lengthâa low growl reverberating from the depths of his chest, dick pulsing to life in your hand.
Professor Riddle isn't a man you can impress easily. Not with outstanding performances in class, and certainly not by being bold and loudâbut you, you have found a way.
An incredibly filthy one.
It was your idea to place a mirror opposite his work desk. Your idea to only wear your tiniest skirts and thongs when paying him a visit.
And Tomâhe's quickly grown quite fond of your proposition for various reasons.
While he still pretended to focus on the paper in front of him when you entered, as soon as you sank to your knees, he straightened his gaze, watching as you crawled underneath the table on all fours. Your skirt slipped up far enough for him to see itâthe red lace thong he left in a box beneath your duvet as a present now slick and soaked with your want for him.
This is the exact reason why he loves this goddamn mirror so much.
Beneath the table, you begin stroking him softlyânot tightly enough for it to feel good, but enough to get him hard for you. His cock twitches in your hand, a pearly bead of precum rolling down his flushed tip.
From the corner of your vision, you see his arms still, the faint sound of his fountain pen adding corrections to the essay in front of him fading into silence. That's when you know you've got his full attention on youâon the feeling of your hand pleasuring him, on your reflection in the mirror as you wriggle your ass for him.
"Concentrate, professor." you murmur, collecting the wetness on the head of his cock with the tip of your tongue, humming in approval at the familiar taste. "Wouldn't want you to make a mistake, hm?"
"Quiet," he replies almost instantly, voice raspy, his cock now pulsing and rock-hard in your palm. "Finish what you've started, brat."
His left hand drops to his lap, finds your hair, and pulls you closerâan unspoken warning not to get too brave with him. At the same time, he flips up your skirt with his fine leather shoes again, which slipped down the curve of your ass.
"Now, arch your back and get to work. Want to watch how wet you get just from sucking me."
You do as he says, of course, one hand on his thigh, the other tightly wrapped around his base as you guide the first few inches of him past your glossed lips. He groans lowly when he feels your wet, hot tongue circle the sensitive head of his cock, relaxing back against his chair, his pen slipping from his hand, eyes fluttering closed.
God, he needs this after today.
You take him deeper thenâeager to taste his hot cum on your tongue.
But thenâjust as you're about to choke around him for the first time that eveningâtwo sharp knocks echo from the door to his study.
He tenses instantly, and you draw back in surprise. If anyone sees you two like this, you are in trouble. Big trouble. You inch closer to him beneath the desk, sitting in between his legs in order to make as little of you visible as you canâbut clearly Tom isn't satisfied with that solution.
"Hide yourself in the closet," he hisses beneath his breath, watching the door handle as the person knocks another time. "Now!"
You roll your eyes at that, because the closet in his study is fucking tinyâbut you decide to listen for once. Or at least, you want to listen for onceâhowever, before you get to do so, the door flies open, and an exasperated student of the second year bursts inside, losing a few papers on the way, stopping right before his desk.
"Professor Riddle, I have something urgent to discuss!"
You sit back down, breathing out a relieved breath. He didn't see you at first glance, thank Merlin and thank whatever gods Muggles believe in.
Tom must be equally relieved, easing the tension in his muscles slightly. He clears his throat before he speaks. "What is it, Mr. Flewett?"
The younger student goes on to explain said urgent matterâand you have to keep yourself from giggling and subsequently getting yourself caught. His very urgent matter is the project due in two days. He's askingâbeggingâTom for an extension.
The student must be new here. No one else would dare even think of asking Riddle thisâor bursting into his study without permission.
He's talking on and on, without a single break. Trying to explain how busy he's been, that he hasn't yet started with the preparation. Making it worse for him without even meaning to do so.
This is good, you thinkâhe's so caught up in his own problem, in his nervousness, that he doesn't notice you at all, neither as a soft laugh escapes your lips when Tom relaxes fully, and you can clearly imagine the disinterested look that must be etched into his features currently.
His hand finds your hair again thenâtugging at the roots gently, shutting you up.
The student is still talking.
And your professor's cock? Twitching right before your lips and so fucking hard, his tip is glistening with precum.
What a terrible waste.
An idea comes to your mind thenâlips curving into an evil little smile. This will be fun.
You arch your back againâskirt still bunched around your waist, lace of your panties damp with arousal. The sight of it earns you a low growl from him, shifting slightly in his seat.
The student stumbles over his next words, but keeps talking, explaining, apologising.
Poor Tomâhe must be so damn bored. So why not spice it up a little?
Your fingers hook into the lace of your panties, slowly, teasingly easing them down your thighs until they're just above your knees, where they're bent on the floorâyour soaked pussy now perfectly angled towards the mirror.
Because you know his eyes are on your reflection in his mirror, not on the student pleading with him to grant him extra time for his project. Riddle stills completely at the sight right before his eyesâbut he keeps his composure. For now.
With a relaxed, bored voice, he answers his student that it's not possible to extend the due date. That this is his own fault, a missed chance for a good grade when he is already failing his class.
Tom is so good at this. So awfully talented at keeping his voice steady, his expression neutral and strict, even when his cock is leaking precum, the thick vein on the underside pulsing, practically begging for your lips and mouth. So good at answering nonchalantly, while every hidden part of his body is telling an entirely different storyâhand in your hair tightening to a level that's bordering painful, thigh muscles flexing beneath your touch.
Another pearl of precum forms on top of his pretty cock, and this timeâthis time, you can't resist.
Your face is mere centimetres from his dick, and you close the distance within less than a second, swiping your tongue over the wet, reddened head of his cock, letting the taste of him flood your senses, thighs clenching.
Tom hisses, his hips barely staying seated with much effort on his side. He fucking hisses, not quietly eitherâshutting the student's rambles up effectively.
His fingers stay buried in your hairâbut he doesn't make a move to push you away, instead, he keeps you right there.
"A-Are you alright, Mr. Riddle?" the younger student manages, voice trembling, as do his legs not a metre away from you.
Tom takes his sweet time to respond to that. Moments that must feel like hours to the guy pleading with him, probably already realising his mistake. In the meanwhile, your tongue darts out again, brushing over his tip with short kitten licks, essentially having his hips buck into your touch.
"Yes, yes, I am." Tom grits out, eyes focused on the mirror behind the student, watching you tease him. "We will speak about this matter laterâyou're dismissed."
From the periphery of your vision, you catch the blonde guy shake his head. "But professor, this is urgent⌠Iâ"
You decide it's a good time to wrap your lips around the aching head of his cock, suckling gently, one hand wrapped around his thick, throbbing baseâslick with your spit and precumâthe second cupping his balls, massaging gently.
"Later," I said." Tom responds, voice shaky. The student gulps, taking a cautious step backwards. "Can you not see I am quite occupied?"
Poor guy. Probably thinking this is because of him.
He nods then, retreating towards the door. "Yes sir, my deepest apologies."
When Tom doesn't spare him more than a strict glance, he leaves in a haste, the door falling shut behind him.
Tom pulls you off his cock with a wet sound the second the lock clicks.
"Dumb little girl," he murmurs, glaring down at the innocent eyes you're offering him. "I expect you to make this up to me laterânow, finish what you've started. And show me, with extra effort, just how sorry you are."
"I am not sorry, though." You say decidedly before you spit on his cock, watching it cascade down the side before taking him back in your mouth.
He pretends he didn't hear you. For your sake.
The thing is, you like it messyâand Tom, Tom loves it messy. He adores how filthy you sound with him stuffing your mouth full, when you drool around him and soak him with your spit. Undoubtedly though, his favourite part is when you let his cum dribble back onto his cock and watch it drip down to his balls, mixing with your saliva before you suck it back in and swallow the mess you've created.
He fucking loves how nasty you are for him.
Right now, he's observing you bob your head up and down his length, gagging around him each time his tip hits the back of your throatâthe vibrations having his fingers fist your hair more roughly, groaning lowly.
"Mmm, yâ taste so good," you mumble around his cock denting your cheek, sucking eagerly. He twitches inside you at that, hissing when your hot tongue swipes over the crown of him.
"You have a filthy mouth on you, darling." Tom replies, guiding your head down on his length until you chokeâkeeping you there for a little longer before he lets you catch your breath.
You smile up at him, then. "You love it, professor. Don't pretend it's any different."
The next few minutes, you gradually increase your paceâkeep him lodged in your throat for longer, spluttering around him before you withdraw and wet his cock with your spit, licking it back up before your lips close around him again, and you repeat the process.
Your hand leaves his thigh, wandering between your own insteadâgently rubbing circles around your neglected, puffy clit, spreading your folds as you run two fingers down your slick slit.
"Fuck," Tom's head dips back at that view. Your glistening, slick-coated pussy on display for him while you make the filthiest sounds sucking him off, gagging and moaning around him.
He is embarrassingly close. Already.
The things you are doing to himâŚ
âŚAnd the things he will do to you in returnâŚ
"Should have you write an essay on how to pleasure a man," he rasps, hips jerking upwards when you choke around him again, allowing him to feel the vibrations of your muscles. He hisses lowly, wetting his lips at the slick sounds your fingers are drawing from your cunt.
You ease off of him for a second then, blinking up at him innocently.
"Would you let me passâ," you ask him, licking a thick stripe up the pulsing vein on the underside of his cock, holding eye contact while you do so. "âprofessor?"
"Fuckâ" he responds, groaning in pleasure when you suck him back into your warm mouth. "With an Outstanding, even."
Professor Riddle has never once given anyone the highest markâclaiming that no work can ever be perfect. It simply doesn't exist for him. Never has.
"Mmmmh," you purr, suckling on his oversensitive tip, purposely keeping him right on that blissful edge he's currently teetering on. "Generous."
He shakes his head, cock throbbing inside your mouth, your head sinking down on him until your nose is pressed against his lower abdomen. "No. Well deserved."
You quicken your pace at that, and he growls, gritting his teeth, jaw clenched tightlyâhe is going to come. He is going to fucking come so hard, you'll fucking struggle with it.
When both of his hands fist your hair, pushing you down on his pulsing length, you know he is going to spill down your throat any secondâand when your throat closes around the invasion, and you struggle against his grip, he finally does.
Accompanied by a string of mumbled curses, he empties himself deep inside your mouth with thick, hot ropes of white cum, making you swallow around him eagerly before he lets you go.
You pull off him, sucking in deep breaths as you cough violently, a string of saliva connecting your swollen lips to his flushed tip.
When your breathing slows down, an eager grin spreads on your lips. You dive back inâtongue cleaning your thick spit and the remnants of his cum off his cock, making nasty, slick sounds.
"Come here," he grunts, chair screeching against the wooden planks of his floor as he lifts you onto his lap, kissing your lips and wiping the drool from your chin. "You are a nasty fucking girl. Y'know that?"
Your head dips to press a kiss to his tense jaw. "Only for my favourite professor. With the others I am good. Mostly."
SMACK!
Your head whips to the side at the sharp impact his palm makes with your cheek, leaving behind a blissful sting, coaxing a moan from your lips.
"Sit down on it," he orders, dark brown eyes leaving no room for argument as they flick from your own to his hardening cock mere inches from your slick pussy. "I don't want to hear another word from that filthy mouth until I am done correcting these essays."
Your head turns to find a huge pile of papers on his desk.
No fucking way.
"But I am invited to a birthday party," you pout, fighting the hold he has on youâwithout success.
He huffs a laugh, lifts your hips, and sinks into your weeping, pulsing hole with one single, vicious thrustâthen, lodged deep in your warm, velvety walls, he averts his attention back to the paper he left abandoned on his desk around half an hour ago.
"You will not move a single inch until I am done here with you, sweetheart. Even dumb little girls like you have to learn that every action comes with its consequences."
little funfact: I rushed through writing this as I am currently at a birthday party posting this. yep. you heard that right.
thank you so much for reading! <3 feel free to reblog and leave feedback! :3
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Š2026 viperify. please do not copy, translate or claim my work as your own
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Synopsis: The third arrow strikes, sealing the fate of Jacaerys Velaryon⌠except he wakes up in a world without dragons, convinced it was only a dream. Or was it? Because there is one promise his soul never forgot, and somehow⌠yours remembers it too.
Pairing: Jacaerys Velaryon x fem!Reader
Genre: reincarnation au, modern!jacaerys, established relationship
Warning: None tbh its just fluff (coping mechanismđĽš), there is no specific description of reader so enjoy, no aegon or viserys, Rhaenyra is married to Laenor but its platonic, inaccurate description of battle of the gullet? (I tried-).
A/N: I recently got into HOTD and then I lost my favourite character aka Jace. I made this blog so I can be delulu about him đ. Also half of this is me word vomitingđĽ´.
Word Count: 10.1k
- English is not my first language so / apologise in advance for any mistakes or typos!
The sea did not merely roll that day, it burned.
Fire danced with a horrific, erratic grace across the blackened waters of the Gullet, transforming the vital shipping lane into a sprawling, floating graveyard. Flames leapt from ship to ship in hungry arcs, feeding on timber and pitch and the desperate prayers of drowning men. Beneath the merciless onslaught of Team Blackâs dragons, mighty Triarchy war-galleys splintered like kindling, their hulls cracking open to swallow their crews whole. Great masts toppled into the waves with the slow, theatrical finality of falling monuments. And yet, this was no easy victory. No clean triumph etched into the history books with golden ink. Below, Lord Corlys Velaryonâs fleet fought with everything it had, attempting to trap the armada in the narrow, choking passage, buying time in blood and smoke and screaming iron.
The atmosphere was a living thing, a suffocating shroud woven from the sharp salt tang of brine, the acrid bite of billowing smoke, the unmistakable iron-sweetness of fresh blood, and the sickening, almost honeyed stench of burning pitch. It coated the throat and burned the eyes.
High above the carnage, roaring through the roiling tempest of fire and ash, rode Prince Jacaerys Velaryon.
He sat astride Vermax like a man born to the sky because he was. The great emerald dragon cut through the smoke-choked air like a gleaming blade, his scales catching the hellish firelight below, wings spread wide. Jaceâs riding leathers were already dark with spray and soot. His dark curls whipped against his face. He did not notice. His eyes were fixed on the battle, calculating and measuring, feeling the terrible weight of command settle across his shoulders with the intimacy of something he had worn all his life.
He had locked his mother in her chambers at Dragonstone before leaving. Had stood outside the door and listened to her pound against it, her voice cracking on his name. The sound had nearly unmade him entirely. But she was the queen. She was the cause. She could not be lost, and Jacaerys Velaryon had long since made peace with the arithmetic of that.
She lives. Therefore, I go.
Beside him, Baela streaked across the smoke on Moondancer fierce and brilliant, her silver hair streaming behind her like a war banner. And then, piercing through the mist like something half-imagined, a new silhouette emerged. Jaceâs eyes snapped to it. His stomach lurched with shock before his heart swelled with a pride so fierce it nearly hurt.
Rhaena. Flying the wild dragon Sheepstealer.
Of course she was.
Together they were three dragons raining hell from the heavens, and for one blazing, exhilarating moment, Jace believed they might actually win this despite Sheepstealer almost knocking him out. He watched their collective fire devastate Admiral Loharâs vanguard below, great tongues of flame consuming the armadaâs leading ships, sending men screaming into the sea. He felt the savage triumph of it. The rightness.
Then the heavy, rhythmic thrum of scorpions began.
Massive iron bolts tore through the clouds around them. The Triarchy fleet was enormous, he had known this, had known it academically the way one knows a thing from maps and reports but knowing it and watching it materialize below him in all its terrible scale were entirely different experiences.
He pressed Vermax into a steep, dangerously low dive.
Below, through the roiling chaos, Jace had spotted Lord Corlysâs flagship being violently rammed by Loharâs vessel. The silver-haired sea snake, his grandfather by every measure that mattered, surrounded and struggling. Jace made his decision in the space of half a breath. He would break the enemy lines. He would fly low. He would end this.
He flew too close to the water.
His focus had narrowed to a single burning point, the ships, the threat, the duty and so he did not hear the volley until it was already too late.
A heavy iron shaft sliced violently through the membrane of Vermaxâs right wing with a sound like tearing cloth and screaming metal fused together. Another slammed directly into the dragonâs chest with a concussive, world-shaking force that Jace felt through every bone in his body.
Vermax screamed.
The sound ripped through Jace like a physical blade. Not a roar, not the magnificent, terrible declaration of a dragon in battle. A scream. Raw and agonizing and so deeply personal that Jace felt his own lungs seize in sympathy, as though the bolt had pierced him too. The great emerald body shuddered beneath him. The massive wings faltered, losing the steady rhythm that held them aloft. The world tilted.
They were falling.
âNo-â
Jace yanked desperately on the reins, his boots straining hard against the stirrups, body thrown forward as the sea rushed upward to meet them with terrifying speed. Wind screamed past his ears. The fire and the smoke and the battle became a chaotic blur of sensation.
âVermax, fly!â
The dragon fought. Even now, even broken and burning, Vermax fought. A beast born of fire, refusing absolutely to yield to the water. One wing beat heavily, then another. The torn membrane fluttered uselessly, a tattered rag of what it had been, but still Vermax tried, and something in Jaceâs chest shattered at the sight of it.
âSoves!â His voice broke on the word, all royal dignity stripped away, reduced to something raw and helpless and very young. âSoves, Vermax! Please-â
One final, agonizing beat of the wings.
It was not enough.
Freezing, brine-heavy water swallowed Jacaerys Velaryon whole. It was not like diving, it was like being struck by the earth itself, like the sea had become solid in the last instant before collision, and he felt the shock travel up through his ankles, his knees, his spine, rattling his teeth in his skull. The sheer velocity of the crash tore his fingers from the saddle. The weight of his armor dragged at him immediately, a slow, patient, lethal pull downward into the dark.
Primal instinct flared.
He unhooked himself and practically clawed upward. His lungs burned. The cold was absolute, the kind that doesnât feel cold at all but rather feels like being unmade, like the sea was simply erasing him a layer at a time. He could see nothing, only dark water and distant fire and the enormous bulk of Vermax somewhere below him, a shadow become a nightmare.
He burst through the surface with a gasp so violent it tore his throat.
âVermax!â
He spun in the churning water, hair plastered to his face, salt burning his eyes. The battle raged on around him, ships groaning and splitting, men screaming, iron raining from all directions. The world had not paused for him.
âVermax!â
Through the haze of cresting waves, he found him. His dragon, his Vermax, who had carried him since boyhood, who had grown as he had grown, who had been as much a part of him as his own heartbeat was desperately trying to swim. The damaged wings beat uselessly to try to swim up. His great neck was straining upward. His eyes, when they met Jaceâs from below the water, held something that a person with less grief in them might have dismissed as imagination.
They did not look like the eyes of an animal.
They looked like the eyes of someone saying goodbye.
A massive anchor, or debris, Jace could not tell which, tangled around Vermaxâs exhausted body. The sea accepted its offering. With a final, sorrowful look that Jacaerys Velaryon would carry with him for the rest of his life.
He never resurfaced.
Something inside Jace broke. Not cracked. Not bent. Broke, the way an old bone breaks, the kind that doesnât ever quite knit back the same way. He hauled his upper body onto a large piece of floating wreckage with the determination of a body that had not yet received the message from his mind that none of this mattered anymore. His chest heaved in ragged, desperate gasps. He was shaking. He was exhausted in a way that reached all the way down into whatever part of him had believed, until this moment, that he might survive this.
He had not brought enough of that belief. He saw that now.
He thought of his mother.
The image of her face, proud and terrified and trying not to show either rose unbidden. He had done this for her. Had done all of it for her. He hoped she would understand, someday, that locking her in her chambers had been the most love he had ever offered anyone.
He thought of Baela. Of Rhaena.
He thought of-
A sharp, dull impact struck his upper back.
Jace lurched forward with a sound that was almost nothing, barely a breath. Confused, of all things, not yet understanding, he glanced over his shoulder. A heavy crossbow bolt protruded from his shoulder blade at an angle that his mind catalogued with strange, distant calm, the way one notices a detail in a painting.
Slowly, numbly, he turned his head toward the source.
A Triarchy war-galley drifted just yards away. Lined along the wooden railing stood a row of Admiral Loharâs soldiers, unhurried, methodical, their crossbows leveled at the figure in the water.
They knew exactly who he was. There was no urgency in their posture, no battlefield fever. This was an execution.
The heir to the Iron Throne, stranded and defenseless.
A second bolt flew. It slammed into his chest. He heard it before he felt it.
Then a third...straight to the neck.
A strange, sudden calm washed over him.
The deafening roar of the battle receded, becoming muffled, distant, the way sounds narrow when one goes underwater. The sea rocked him gently now, almost tenderly, as if it had been waiting all along to offer this small mercy at the end. He had not expected kindness. He was grateful for it.
He thought of his mother, safe on Dragonstone.
He thought of Baelaâs laughter.
He thought of his brothers.
And he thought with a softness that surprised him, with something that might have been the very last warmth his body could generate, of you. Of a future that would not be built. Of a promise he was not sure, now, that he had ever been given the chance to make.
The last image to imprint itself on the fading mind of Jacaerys Velaryon was that reflection.
A burning sky, mirrored in the water.
Beautiful.
Tragic.
Then everything went black.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.
Jacaerys bolted upright with a gasp that felt like surfacing.
His eyes flew open. His hand flew to his chest and then to his neck, pressing hard against his sternum, feeling for something, a wound, an absence, a bolt buried in bone and found nothing but the soft cotton of his t-shirt and the solid, living rhythm of his own heart.
He sat there for a long moment, chest heaving, and simply stared at the ceiling.
White plaster. Crown moulding. A small water stain shaped vaguely like a continent.
No smoke.
No dragon.
No sea.
No battle.
Just a bedroom. His bedroom.
Morning sunlight filtered through floor-to-ceiling windows in long, clean shafts, illuminating the warm disorder of his life: the desk buried under business textbooks and notebooks with pages dog-eared and margins crowded with his handwriting, his laptop open from the night before with a lecture slide still visible on the screen, a hoodie slung over the back of his desk chair. Outside the windows, Kingâs Landing stretched endlessly in the early light, the city already stirring, glass towers catching the sun.
His alarm clock flashed 7:00 AM.
No swords or the banners of House Targaryen.
Jace pressed the heels of both palms against his eyes and breathed.
The memories were still there. That was the wrong word for them, memories. They did not feel like the soft, dissolving stuff of ordinary dreams that faded on the edges as soon as you tried to examine them. They felt like the other kind of remembering, the kind that lives in the body rather than the mind. He could still feel the cold of the Gullet in his fingers. He could still smell the smoke. He could still feel the weight of dragon-riding leathers across his shoulders, the particular pull of Vermaxâs movement through the air, the way the saddle had sat against the backs of his thighs.
He could still feel the bolts.
Just a dream, he told himself. The words felt inadequate in his own mouth, like trying to describe a storm with the word weather. He muttered them anyway, pressing his face harder into his palms.
âJust a dream.â
A dream where he had been a prince.
A prince who had died.
His stomach dropped with a physical lurch. The alarm was still beeping. He silenced it with a slap and sat on the edge of the bed for one more moment, just one, breathing in the ordinary scent of his ordinary room..
Then his brain supplied the information he had been avoiding.
Classes.
Shit.
He was already late.
He moved through his morning routine with the efficiency of someone running on instinct rather than thought, shower, clothes, a cursory battle with his curls that ended, as it always did, in a draw. He emerged from the bathroom in jeans and sneakers and his favorite dark hoodie, his hair doing exactly what it wanted. There wasnât time to argue with it. There was rarely ever time.
The smell of coffee reached him in the hallway. It pulled at something in his chest and he followed it through the penthouse to the kitchen.
His steps halted in the doorway.
Rhaenyra stood at the island counter, reading something on her tablet with the focused, slightly stern expression she wore when she was processing information she found annoying. A coffee mug steamed beside her elbow, forgotten. She was already dressed soft grey, elegant, effortlessly so in the way that had always seemed to come naturally to her and she looked exactly as she always looked in the morning, tired by all the corporate bullshit.
CEO of Targaryen Corporation. One of the most influential women in Kingâs Landing. The most formidable person he had ever known.
His mother.
The word hit him somewhere unsteady. Something twisted painfully in his chest, relief so acute it nearly hurt, threaded through with the dreaming grief of a boy who had watched her face in his mind as the water closed over him, who had spent his last conscious moment believing she was safe, needing her to be safe, and had been right without ever knowing he was right.
He crossed the room before he had consciously decided to.
He wrapped his arms around her.
Rhaenyra nearly dropped her coffee.
âJacaerys-â
She caught herself, setting the mug down with a firm clink on the marble countertop, and then without hesitation, because she had always been this, whatever else she was, she wrapped her arms around him and held him back.
âSweet boy.â Her voice was softer now. Her fingers found their way into his curls the way they had when he was very small. âWhatâs the matter?â
Jace swallowed against the tightness in his throat.
The dream came rushing back through him like a tide, the war, the weight of a crown his mother should have inherited without blood, the desperate, bone-deep need to protect her. The image of her face as he had walked away from Dragonstone, toward the dragon, toward the battle, toward the Gullet. The way he had looked back.
He shook his head against her shoulder.
âIâm fine.â
âYou are clearly not fine.â
Her hand moved in slow, soothing circles against his back. Despite himself, despite everything, Jace felt something in him begin to loosen.
He laughed. A weak, slightly broken sound, but genuine. âI justâŚâ His voice cracked on the nothing he was trying to say.
Rhaenyra pulled back slightly to look at him. Not the way she looked at her board of directors, or at rivals across conference tables, or at the city from thirty floors up. The other way. The private way, that only he and his brothers ever saw.
âWhat happened?â
He wiped his eyes quickly, hoping she wouldnât comment on it and took a breath.
âI had the most vivid dream.â
âWhat kind of dream?â
He hesitated. There was something strange about saying it. As though speaking about it aloud would make it either more real or less, and he wasnât sure which outcome he wanted.
âI was a prince,â he said.
Rhaenyra blinked. Whatever she had been expecting, it was not that.
âA prince?â
âYeah.â A small smile found its way onto his face, unwilling, almost involuntary. âYou were a queen.â
Something passed across her expression something soft, something she would never have allowed in a meeting room. âOh?â
âI died fighting a battle for you.â
Silence.
She looked at him for a long moment. Then she reached up and brushed a curl from his forehead with the gentleness that had no performance in it, something she reserved for the three of them and no one else.
âWell,â she said finally, her smile warming to something that was almost, almost teasing. âThat sounds exhausting.â
Jace stared. âThatâs all youâve got?â
âYou are standing in my kitchen wearing yesterdayâs hoodie and telling me about dragon wars, Jacaerys.â
He opened his mouth to protest then closed it. âFair.â
She squeezed his shoulder. âIt was only a dream.â
âYou know,â said a new voice from the doorway, âsome families start their mornings with good morning.â
Luke wandered in carrying a cereal box like a trophy, nineteen years old and permanently, professionally smug. He surveyed the scene with the cheerful heartlessness of a younger brother who had found ammunition and intended to use it.
âDid Jace finally lose his mind?â
Behind him, Joffrey, fourteen and grinning with the particular delight of someone who had been waiting for this squeezed past into the kitchen. âAbout time.â
Jace rolled his eyes so hard it was almost an athletic achievement. âThere he is.â
âDreaming about being a prince?â Luke plucked a bowl from the cupboard with casual ease. âThatâs because youâre already treated like one.â
The napkin Jace threw hit him square in the face. Luke threw it back. Rhaenyra sighed with the air of a woman who had calculated exactly how many more years of this lay before her and found the number disheartening.
âMy sons,â she said, picking up her coffee. âTruly intellectual giants.â
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
Breakfast passed with the comfortable velocity of mornings that had been rehearsed through repetition until they ran themselves. Luke complaining about something, Joffrey eating cereal in quantities that defied his size, Rhaenyra reading from her tablet while simultaneously tracking all three of them with the peripheral attention of someone who had never once been entirely off duty.
Jace was reaching for his coffee when Rhaenyra glanced up.
âAre you still picking up your girlfriend?â
He froze.
The coffee cup remained halfway to his face, arrested in mid-air.
ââŚMy what?â
Lukeâs head snapped up. The expression that crossed his face was one of pure, unalloyed joy. He looked like he had been handed a gift.
Rhaenyra stared at her eldest with the patient, faintly incredulous expression of a woman who had not expected to be performing this particular reality check on a Tuesday morning.
âYour girlfriend.â
âOh.â Jace set the cup down carefully. âRight.â
You.
He had a girlfriend.
A beautiful girlfriend, and she was his girlfriend, and she had been his girlfriend for- he was briefly lost in the arithmetic of it, which was itself a kind of answer and she was wonderful, she was brilliant, she made him laugh, and somehow in the space between waking up with the sea in his lungs and standing in his motherâs kitchen in yesterdayâs hoodie, he had momentarily forgotten she existed.
And then, because his brain was apparently in full catastrophic mode this morning: betrothed.
Not yet. Not technically. But the word had been sitting in the back of his mind ever since he woke up from his dream.
Heat flooded his face with spectacular completeness.
Luke nearly choked on his cereal.
âOh my God.â
âShut up.â
âYou forgot your girlfriend.â
âOnly briefly.â
âOnlyâ Luke dissolved entirely, shoulders shaking. Across the table, Joffrey watched with the dignified appreciation of a connoisseur.
Rhaenyra shook her head slowly. âHonestly, Jace.â
âIt was a very intense dream,â he said, with as much dignity as one can muster while slowly turning the color of a sunset.
âYou forgot your girlfriend.â
âThe dream had dragons, Mum.â
She gave him the look. The specific look, the one that had been making him feel twelve years old since he was actually twelve years old. âSheâs a lovely girl. I wish youâd bring her home more often.â
Jace stood from the table with the decisive energy of a man drawing a conversation to a close.
âI was planning to.â
âWhen?â
âSoon.â
âToday?â
ââŚPossibly.â
âGood.â Rhaenyra returned to her tablet, the slight smile at the corner of her mouth saying everything she was too dignified to say aloud.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
The underground parking garage was cool and dim, smelling of concrete and oil and the expensive quiet of a building where people took the lift rather than the stairs. Jaceâs Porsche sat in its usual spot, Oak Green Metallic, catching the fluorescent light.
Vermax.
He had named the car Vermax which now sounded so ironic to him.
He stood beside the driverâs door for a moment, hand on the handle, the thought arriving fully formed and then sitting there in his chest with an odd weight. He had named his car Vermax years ago. He had thought it was because he liked the sound of it, or because it was the name of a character in a book heâd read, or because of some half-remembered reason that had never quite solidified into anything coherent.
He looked at the car. The deep green of it. The long, low lines of it, built for speed, built for the sky-
Built for the sky.
A strange feeling settled over him, the kind of not-quite-vertigo that comes with recognizing something without being able to name what it is youâre recognizing. Like seeing an old friend across a crowd before youâve registered their face.
He shook it off. Got in and drove.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
The street outside your house was quiet in the way that Tuesday mornings in Kingâs Landing occasionally managed to be, with the morning light that made ordinary things seem briefly considered. Jace pulled to the curb and sat for a moment with the engine idling, window down.
Then the front door opened and you stepped out.
He got out of the car.
The morning light caught your hair the way it always did, making you look almost angelic in Jaceâs eyes in that moment. You were still in the act of adjusting the strap of your bag when you spotted him, and the smile that crossed your face. Happy just to see him.
And for one strange, suspended moment, another image overlapped the morning like a transparency laid over a photograph. A figure standing on the cliffs of Dragonstone. The sea grey below and the wind pulling at dark fabric. Watching him leave. The expression on her face, your face, heartbroken and resolute and trying to be neither.
Waiting for him to come back.
The image dissolved as quickly as it had arrived. The morning reasserted itself. You were walking toward the car, your bag settled on your shoulder now, your smile still in place, and Jace found himself already stepping forward already moving toward with certainty that was less decision than gravity.
Before you could say a word, he took your hand and raised it, and pressed a kiss against your knuckles.
Deliberatea and unhurried. Like heâd done it a thousand times before, in other rooms, in other centuries.
âHow are you, my beloved?â
You stopped.
Looked at the hand.
Looked at him.
And then, because you were you, you laughed, the bright, surprised sound of someone caught genuinely off guard. âWhat has gotten into you this morning?â you questioned him.
Jace grinned, and the grin felt more like him than anything else had all morning. âI genuinely have no idea.â
âYouâre being sooo weird.â You studied him with the narrowed eyes trying to grasp his words and actions. âHow weird is this going to get?â
âI had the wildest dream.â
âOh?â Already your expression was shifting into the one you wore when you were preparing to be entertained.
He leaned forward and kissed you softly quick, warm and certain.
âIn it,â he said against your smile, âyou were my princess too.â
Your cheeks went pink with entirely gratifying speed.
âOh my God.â
âYou asked.â
âI asked what was wrong with you, not-â
âDetails.â
âJacaerys Velaryon, I am going to need you to be normal for the next five minutes-â
âI make no promises.â
He opened the passenger door for you, still grinning, and the morning felt lighter than it had when heâd left the penthouse.
The dream wasnât entirely terrible, he thought, settling behind the wheel. If nothing else, it had done this, sharpened his vision, made ordinary things brilliant again. Made you more vivid than youâd already been, which was saying something considerable.
He found himself smiling the entire drive to university.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
University should have felt normal.
Instead, Jace spent the entire morning convinced he was losing his mind by degrees as new details of his dream would hit him.
The dream lingered with a persistence that ordinary dreams did not have, the kind he usually forgot by the time he reached the kitchen. This one clung. Every corridor he walked reminded him of castle hallways, the echo of footsteps on stone, and the smell of torch smoke. Every crowded lecture hall conjured the geometry of noble courts; the subtle theatre of power performed through proximity. His Strategic Management lecture had an entire section on resource allocation that kept pulling his thoughts sideways, toward councils and war rooms and Dragonstone.
He stared at his notebook.
He had written, in the margin: Corlys was right about the Gullet.
He had no idea when.
âYouâre disassociating again.â
Jace blinked.
Across the seminar table sat Cregan Stark, regarding him with the expression he used on everything: tall, dark-haired, slow-blinking, fundamentally and constitutionally unimpressed by the world and all its events. He was from Winterfell like genuinely, actually from Winterfell, which Jace had always found slightly funny without ever quite being able to explain why.
Theyâd been best friends since secondary school, the friendship that had calcified into something so much more. They were like brothers in every sense.
Also, he looked almost exactly like the Cregan from the dream.
Same jaw. Same eyes. Same expression, the one that said I am listening to you and I find you exhausting.
Same, in other words, as he always looked well except his had slightly shorter hair.
âWhat?â Jace managed.
Cregan raised one eyebrow. âYouâve been staring at me for ten seconds with an expressionless face.â
âSorry.â He rubbed a hand over his face. âI had a strange dream. I feel like I keep repeating these words over and over again.â
âYou texted me at four in the morning.â
Jace went very still.
âI did?â
Cregan reached for his phone with the patience of a man who had long since resigned himself to the chaos of being Jace Velaryonâs closest friend. He scrolled briefly, then began reading aloud in the flat, informational tone of a news anchor delivering a weather report.
ââBrother, imagine if we were medieval nobles.ââ
âOh, God.â
ââYou would have loved Winterfell.ââ
âCregan-â
ââYou were Lord of the North.ââ He glanced up briefly. âIâm from Winterfell, Jace. I grew up in Winterfell. I know what Winterfell is.â
âPlease stop-â
âI miss Vermax.â
Cregan lowered the phone.
âI donât know what Vermax is, if its not talking about your car.â he said.
Jace buried his face in both hands and made a sound that was less a word than a comprehensive statement.
âYou were never meant to read those.â
âYou sent them to me.â
âI was apparently not fully conscious at four in the morning. I donât remember doing this at all.â
âThatâs concerning.â
âYes.â
âAre you okay?â
The question arrived without ceremony, Cregan always asked things he actually wanted to know, dropped into a conversation like a stone dropped into water, watching to see what it displaced. Jace hesitated for long enough that the silence became its own answer.
âYeah,â he said. Then, quietly: âNot entirely.â
Cregan nodded. He didnât push. This was something Jace had always valued about him, the Stark capacity to hold space without filling it.
âTell me later,â Cregan said, and turned back to his laptop.
Mostly, Jace thought. He was mostly okay.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
You found him outside the business building at noon, materializing from the flow of students and your smile arrived before you did.
Jace felt the thing in his chest that had been clenched since 7 AM ease, slowly, like a hand opening. There was something about you that operated on him this way, had always operated on him this way, since the beginning. A quality of presence that grounded him, that made the worldâs coordinates make sense again. Heâd never found quite the right words for it. Heâd stopped trying.
You slipped your hand into his without ceremony.
âBetter than this morning?â
âA little.â
âStill thinking about your prince dream?â
He laughed, the sound freer than he expected. âUnfortunately.â
âYou are such a nerd.â
âI was literally fighting a war.â
âYou were dreaming about fighting a war.â
âDetails.â
âJacaerys Velaryon, if this dream becomes your entire personality, I want it on the record that I tried to prevent it-â
âNoted and rejected.â
You rolled your eyes with magnificent feeling. âI make no promises about what I tell your mother.â
Together you walked toward the cafĂŠ nearby. A small, overcrowded place called something Jace could never quite remember but it had had excellent coffee and terrible lighting and was perpetually full of students and professors who had clearly rather be somewhere else. The place that existed to absorb the ambient anxiety of a university and convert it, through caffeine, into something marginally more functional.
You had barely settled into your seats when a familiar voice arrived from approximately two tables away, belonging to someone who had apparently been watching for them.
âWell, if it isnât my favorite nephew.â
Aegon Targaryen dropped into the empty chair beside Jace with the comfortable confidence of a man who owned, and this was literally true, approximately half the building they were sitting in. Twenty-six, blond, expensive, reliably catastrophic. His jacket probably cost more than Jaceâs car maintenance for the year, and he wore it with the carelessness never once considering the cost of anything.
He was nothing like the monster from the dream. The dream-Aegon had been something Jace couldnât fully bring himself to examine yet. Jealous and bitter and capable of terrible things. This Aegon was mostly known for throwing parties that became local legend and mysteriously managing to avoid all professional consequences for anything he did, ever. Jacaerys supposed that has something to do with his mother and his uncle Aemond keeping these things contained.
âTo what do we owe the honor?â Jace asked.
Aegonâs attention had already moved to you.
âAnd how are you?â
âGood,â you said politely.
âStill putting up with him?â
You smiled. âBarely.â
âExcellent answer.â
Jace groaned. Aegon looked absolutely delighted.
âYouâre blushing,â Aegon observed, with the tone of someone reporting a natural phenomenon.
âIâm not.â
âYou absolutely are.â
You leaned over the table, and Jace recognized the look on your face immediately. The collaborative look. The look that meant you had identified an ally.
âHe was calling me his beloved this morning.â
Aegonâs chair nearly lost him. He grabbed the table.
âNo.â
âYes.â
âIn what context?â
âHe kissed my hand. In the street. Before nine in the morning.â
Aegon looked at Jace the way someone looks at an archaeological discovery with facination, slightly appalled, deeply pleased. âThis is the greatest thing that has ever happened.â
Jace contemplated his options. Leaving. Changing his name and moving to Braavos. Committing entirely to the persona of someone who had never been caught calling his girlfriend my beloved at eight forty-five on a Tuesday.
None of these were practical.
He reached for his coffee and said nothing, which Aegon correctly interpreted as total defeat.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
After Aegon eventually wandered off, ostensibly to a meeting, credibly to cause chaos somewhere else and so the cafĂŠ settled back into its ordinary rhythms. Students came and went. Espresso machines hissed. The ambient noise absorbed itself.
You and Jace remained at your table, and the laughter faded naturally, the way good laughter does, not dying but simply becoming something quieter.
He was staring into his coffee again.
You watched him for a moment.
âYou never told me the whole dream, since it has you in a weird mindset today.â you said quietly.
His fingers tightened almost imperceptibly around the cup. He was aware of you looking at him, with your full attention, which had always been more like listening than looking, patient and genuine and without agenda.
âTo put it simply, there was a war,â he said.
You didnât ask him to explain. You waited.
âA civil war.â He looked up briefly, then back at the table. âA war over who would rule over Westeros. My mother was supposed to inherit as was the rightful heir to the throne but there were those who didnât accept it. Didnât accept her.â
âAnd you fought for her.â
âOf course.â
The images came without invitation, Dragonstoneâs grey halls, the council table, the maps spreading the whole kingdom out before them like a wound. The feeling of duty that had lived in his chest since childhood, not as a burden but as a definition. This is who you are. This is what you do.
You reached across the table and took his hand.
He continued.
âI flew a dragon. I know this sounds no so scary but-â Despite everything, he heard the ghost of wonder in his own voice. âVermax. He was- he was mine. Since I was a boy. He knew me.â The wonder curdled, softened into something heavier. âHe died with me.â
Your thumb moved in a slow arc across his knuckles.
âThe last thing I remember,â he said quietly, âwas dying. Floating in the sea, after everything.â He paused.
âIt was strange. It wasnât- it wasnât the way I would have imagined. It wasnât terrifying.â
âWhat was it?â
He thought about it honestly.
âIt was sad,â he said. âBut calm.â
You were quiet for a moment. Then you reached up, and the gesture was so unexpected that he went still, your hand cupping his cheek, steady and warm, thumb tracing a line beneath his eye.
He leaned into it without thinking.
âIâm glad it was only a dream,â you said softly trying to calm his anxieties that he didnât want to confess out loud.
âIâm glad youâre here.â
The tightness in his chest released, not all at once but in stages, like a knot worked loose over time. He turned his head slightly, pressing his lips briefly to your palm, and you let him, and neither of you made anything of it.
Sheâs right, he thought. Whatever that was. Whatever it meant.
He was here. Alive. With his family, with his best friend, with his girl.
Maybe that was enough. Maybe that was, actually, everything.
The afternoon passed.
Classes ended. The university slowly emptied like it did every day at dusk, students and professors releasing themselves back into the city like a pressure valve opening. The parking lot filled briefly with the usual chaos and then thinned.
âMy mother wants you over more often,â Jace mentioned, as they walked toward the Porsche.
âApparently she likes you.â
You brightened immediately. âReally?â
âShe said so unprompted. First thing this morning.â
âGood.â You smiled with satisfaction. âIâm charming.â
Jace looked at you sideways. âYou are deeply smug about this.â
âIâm charming,â you repeated, pleasantly.
He laughed. âCome over tonight?â
You looked at him, with that look you had, the one heâd never found a word for, the one that made him feel simultaneously seen and unsteady in the best possible way. Made him feel a bit giddy.
âIâd love to,â you said.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
The penthouse was unusually quiet when they arrived.
Rhaenyra was visible through the glass of her home office, phone tucked between her ear and shoulder, reading from a document with the focused intensity and it was clear that the woman needed a break from everything. Luke had evaporated somewhere. Joffrey was reportedly studying, a claim no one in the household had ever been successfully able to verify.
You and Jace settled at the dining table with laptops and scattered notes and the collective fiction of productivity.
For forty minutes, it was remarkably functional.
Jace had his economics module open. You were working through something, he didnât ask, didnât need to and the sound of quiet typing and the occasional turn of a page created a kind of companionable silence that he had always thought of as the specific luxury of being comfortable with someone. presence. You could simply be in it.
He was reading about capital allocation.
âJace.â
He looked up.
âYouâre getting lost in your mind again.â
âIâm not what are you talking about?â he said automatically. Then, because honesty was something heâd apparently committed to today: âI was thinking about- uhhh. Economics?â
âThat is not better.â
âYou look pretty,â he said simply.
The silence that followed had a distinct texture.
You looked at him for a long moment. Then you slowly, deliberately, closed your laptop.
âNo,â you said.
âWhat?â
âYou donât get to say things like that when Iâm trying to study.â
âI was simply making an observation.â
âYou are impossible.â
He was very pleased with himself. He did not bother hiding it.
An hour later, the economics module had not progressed. The textbooks had been consolidated into a single pile and pushed to the far end of the table, a gesture that meant these exist and will eventually be addressed, which was as much as either of you were willing to commit to. A film had been agreed upon via negotiation.
Blankets appeared.
The overhead lights went off.
And somehow, as these things always somehow managed, you ended up curled against his chest on the enormous sectional, his arm around your waist, the film playing distantly while neither of you particularly watched it. Your breathing slowed first. His heartbeat was steady and familiar beneath your ear.
The city moved quietly outside the windows.
You didnât remember falling asleep.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
The prince stood before you.
The wind came off the sea like a cold hand, whipping through his dark, curling hair, pressing his black riding coat against his frame. Behind him, Dragonstone rose in its glory against a steel-grey sky, all sharp towers and dark stone, magnificent and terrible, built by people who had never believed in half measures. The sea crashed against the rocks far below. Dark clouds gathered on the horizon with the patient, deliberate advance of something inevitable.
âNo.â
Your voice came out broken.
âNo, please.â
He looked at you the way he always looked at you as if you were the clearest thing in a world that had lately become very unclear, like looking at you was the one thing he could do without effort in a life that had demanded extraordinary effort from him since the moment he was old enough to understand what he was.
âI have to go.â
âYou donât,â you said, even though you knew it wasnât true. Even though somewhere beneath the desperate present tense of the argument, the truer, older part of you already knew exactly what was coming. Already knew the shape of this farewell.
His hands found yours.
They were warm. Strong and real, so real that makes their loss so much more brutal than the loss of things you never fully believed in.
âYou can stay,â you said. Your voice was steadier than you felt. âYou can let someone else-â
âI cannot.â His voice was gentle but stern. He was stubborn and so if he made peace with this decisions, he wouldnât have it any other way.
Tears burned behind your eyes. The fear inside you was almost unbearable and burning, it was twisted and layered, because you knew. You already knew. This was not a premonition, not a vague presentiment. It was knowledge, carried somewhere beneath language, beneath memory, in whatever part of you had been this person before.
You knew what awaited him at the Gullet.
Fire.
Water.
âYou promised.â The words escaped before you could decide to say them.
His expression shifted. Something moved across it, grief, tenderness, the ache of a man who loves something too well to pretend it isnât breaking.
âAnd I will keep that promise but this is a battle I must fight for both myself and my mother.â
He stepped closer, and you let him, and he pressed a kiss to your forehead so gently it barely qualified as a touch at all.
Then he rested his brow against yours.
His eyes never left yours.
âIf I do not return- which I intend to,â
The world seemed to hold its breath.
âI will find you.â
A tear escaped. Traced the line of your cheek. He watched it with eyes that were very dark and very steady.
âIn every lifetime if not this one. I promise.â
The words landed somewhere deep in you, somewhere wordless, somewhere older than the language you used to think with. A promise that had the weight of truth rather than intention.
You memorized his face. The curls. The strong jaw. The eyes, brown and earnest and alive, so alive.
He smiled.
Then he stepped away.
He turned toward the waiting dragon.
Toward the dark water below.
Toward a destiny that was also a death.
And all you could do was watch him leave.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
You woke with a gasp that tore itself from somewhere past your chest.
For several seconds, you could not find the room. Could not find yourself in it. There was only the dream...the cliffs, the wind, his forehead against yours, the sound of his footsteps retreating and the grief of it, which was specific and devastating and nothing at all like the vague emotional residue of ordinary sleep.
Tears burned behind your eyes. Your heart was pounding.
You pushed yourself upright. A blanket tangled around your legs. The room was dim, the film long since ended, the television showing a menu screen. Outside the floor-to-ceiling windows, Kingâs Landing glittered in the full dark of night, the cityâs lights reflected upward in a warm wash against the low clouds. Jace must have moved you to his room when you fell asleep.
The bedroom door opened.
Jace stepped in carrying two mugs, steam rising from both. He had apparently, at some point during your sleep, been productive.
The moment he saw your face, he froze.
âHey.â
The concern in his voice was immediate, the shift from normal to careful happening in the space of a single syllable.
âWhatâs wrong?â
You didnât answer. The words were somewhere on the way, but in the meantime your body had already decided what it needed, and what it needed was to close the distance between you and him as quickly as possible.
You stood.
Crossed the room.
The mugs barely survived. He caught them against the edge of the side table with an impressive reflex, setting them down quickly before his arms came around your waist, and you buried your face against the side of his neck, and breathed him in.
âSweetheart?â Low and careful. His chin came to rest on top of your head.
You stayed there for a moment just letting the reality of him replace the dream of him. The warmth of him. The solidness.
Then you pulled back. Not far. Your forehead came to rest against his, which put you close enough to feel his breath and see the small crease of worry between his brows.
âI had a dream,â you said. It seems it was your turn to utter those words.
Something moved across his face. He went very still in the way that meant he was paying every variety of attention he had.
âWhat kind of dream?â
âI saw a prince.â
His breath caught. You felt it.
âI saw him leaving for a battle. He was going to fight-â
Your voice faltered, then steadied. âHe knew he might not come back. And he said-â You stopped.
Jaceâs arms tightened around you, almost involuntarily.
âHe said he would find me,â you continued. âThat if he didnât return-â Your eyes met his, and something in your chest recognized something in his. âHe would find me in every lifetime.â
Silence.
Complete, absolute silence.
Jace stared at you.
Because those were the exact words. Not a version of them, not a paraphrase but the exact promise, the exact phrasing, the exact scene, the stone of Dragonstone under grey skies and wind coming off the sea. He had lived it from one side and you had lived it from the other, and here you both were, in a penthouse above a city that did not have dragons, with the memory of them living in your bones.
His throat moved.
You smiled softly with tears still bright at the corners of your eyes. Your hand lifted, your fingers moving gently through his curls, the same gesture that felt simultaneously new and ancient.
âI donât know what any of that means,â you said.
âNeither do I.â
âBut if it was real-â
His forehead pressed more firmly against yours.
âYou kept your promise,â you whispered.
He felt his throat close.
And for the first time since he had woken to the sound of an alarm clock and a bedroom that wasnât the sea, he stopped wondering whether the dream had been real. He stopped wondering whether he was grieving something imagined or something true. He stopped needing to know.
Because you knew.
You had been there.
You rose onto your toes.
Your lips met his.
It was slow and gentle. He kissed you back like someone returning to something, like a navigator finding a landmark in familiar water.
Like he had been waiting centuries and perhaps his soul had waited for this moment. The moment to return to her.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
The knock was soft.
They both startled apart with the excellent reflexes of guilty consciences, then immediately demonstrated the dignity of two people pretending they hadnât.
Jace cleared his throat. Rested his forehead against yours for one final second. His breath was unsteady in the best way.
Another knock.
âJacaerys?â
Rhaenyraâs voice, measured, carrying through the door with the easy authority of a woman who managed board rooms and board members and the shenanigans of three sons as a single uninterrupted professional skill.
âDinner is ready.â They heard the muffled voice of his mother.
Jace answered at a volume calibrated for normalcy âWeâll be there in a minute!â
A pause that had weight.
âFive minutes,â his motherâs voice returned, drier than a desert, and entirely aware of everything and perhaps making a wrong assumption of you two being alone in his room.
You laughed, pressing your face briefly against his shoulder to muffle it. He was already smiling.
âYour mother doesnât trust you.â
âShe absolutely does not.â
âAnd honestly?â You poked his chest. âI donât blame her.â
âYou wound me.â
âGood.â You pulled your hand back, but he caught it, quick and easy, and pressed a kiss to your knuckles again. The same gesture as that morning. The echo of it traveled through both of you clearly.
Your cheeks went pink.
He watched it happen with a feeling in his chest that was too large and too simple to require any examination at all.
There she is, he thought. My girl.
My princess.
He took your hand properly, fingers laced and led you toward the dining room.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
They heard the argument before they reached the dinner table.
Luke and Joffrey, seated across from each other in the arrangement that the family had collectively accepted as a flaw, were conducting a debate with the commitment of two people who had come to win.
âNo, because youâre objectively wrong-â
âIâm objectively right-â
âYou donât even know what objectively means.â
âI literally do.â
âYou used it wrong.â
Joffrey groaned with his whole body. âI hate this family.â
âYou are this family,â Luke pointed out.
Joffrey considered this. âExactly.â
Rhaenyra, at the head of the table, was pinching the bridge of her nose with annoyance. This was her normal and yet it was tiring.
The moment she saw you, her face entirely changed.
âThere she is.â
You smiled. âHi.â
She stood and pulled you into a hug with a warmth that was, Jace thought privately, rather more enthusiastic than his own homecoming greeting most mornings. âI was beginning to think my son had invented you.â
âMum.â
âWhat? He never brings you over.â
âThatâs his fault,â you said.
âTraitor,â Jace said.
âYouâre literally my boyfriend.â
âExactly.â
You smiled sweetly. âIâm allowed.â
Rhaenyra looked delighted in the specific way she allowed herself to look delighted when she was genuinely pleased, a rarity outside this apartment. Luke immediately leaned toward you.
âSee? This is why sheâs my favorite.â
âIâm sitting right here.â
âUnfortunately.â
Jace threw a bread roll at him.
Luke threw one back.
The war began immediately, and lasted approximately five seconds before Rhaenyraâs single sharp look ended it. She had a look for this. It was very effective.
âSometimes I wonder,â she said, settling back into her chair and accepting a bread roll from the basket with the serenity of someone who had already mentally exited the building, âif I raised wolves.â
âThatâs insulting,â Joffrey said.
Everyone looked at him.
The fourteen-year-old shrugged with the composure of someone who had thought this through. âWolves are smarter.â
The silence held for two seconds before Lukeâs expression cracked. Jace looked at the ceiling. Rhaenyraâs attempt at severity collapsed at its foundations.
You sat beside Jace with your hand warm against his under the table, and you were already laughing, and the sound of it filled the room the way laughter does when a room is already full of people who are glad to be there.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
Dinner found its rhythm.
Conversation moved in the easy, overlapping way it does with people who have logged enough hours together that they no longer need to manage it consciously. Luke complained about a group project with the vivid resentment of having decided the problem was everyone else.
Joffrey explained something about a game or a film or a historical period but the audience could not quite keep up, but that seemed to be part of the experience. Rhaenyra complained, with great economy, about company politics, and then told a story about a colleague that had everyone at the table paying full attention (It was Aemond who everytone is afraid of in their company).
You listened to all of it.
Jace, mostly, watched.
He had not expected this. Had woken this morning in the sea, or the memory of it. Had spent the drive to university with the dream still active in his body, had sat through lectures half-present, had carried the weight of Vermaxâs last look in his chest all day like a stone.
And now.
He watched his mother smile at something you said. He watched Luke do the thing he did when he was actually amused, which was different from when he is pretending. Watched Joffrey explain something to you directly, having apparently determined that you were worth the effort, and watched your face do the thing it did when you were genuinely interested in something, slightly forward, slightly bright, entirely present.
You fit here. Not as a guest, not as someone being accommodated. As someone who belonged.
He thought of the dream again.
Remembered standing at the dragonpit of Dragonstone with his armor on and the dragon saddled and the sea grey behind him, and looking back at everything he was leaving, his mother, his brothers, you, the stone halls and the cold salt wind and the ordinary miracle of a morning that didnât require a kingâs son to die for it.
He had wondered, in those last seconds at Dragonstone, if he would ever see any of them again.
He had his answer now.
The realization settled in his chest quietly, without drama. Not a revelation, something more like a confirmation. A peace he hadnât known he was looking for, finding him here, at a dinner table with a bread roll dent in the tablecloth and Joffrey currently holding forth on something no one else understood.
No war. No dragons. No succession. No battles. Just family. Just love.
Just this.
Halfway through dessert, Joffreyâs phone lit up.
âOh!â He reached for it with the speed of receiving news theyâd been waiting for. âDadâs calling.â
Jace felt himself smile before the screen even showed Laenorâs face.
It appeared a moment later, that face, familiar and warm and slightly tanned by whatever sun was currently shining on whatever harbor on whatever coast he was sailing toward. Behind him, a bright blue sky suggested somewhere in Essos, probably. The man was perpetually in motion, perpetually somewhere else and yet found time for them. He was not their real father, but he might as well have been. After Harwin passed away, Rhaenyra had remarried Laenor as more of a deal since Laenor wasnât interested in anything but he cared for Rhaenyra platonically and it seemed to have worked out great and thatâs all that mattered.
âThere are my favorite children.â
Luke snorted. âWeâre your only children.â
âAnd yet somehow still my favorites.â Laenorâs gaze found you across the table, and his face smiled âThere she is.â
You laughed. âHello.â
âGood. Finally, someone sensible has arrived.â
âHey!â Three voices, simultaneous.
Laenor continued as though he hadnât heard. âHow are you, darling?â
âIâm well, thank you.â
Jace groaned. âWhy does everyone in my family like her more than me?â
âBecause,â Laenor said, and the timing was beautiful, âshe has manners.â
The table erupted. Even Rhaenyra, which was a significant achievement.
Laenor spent twenty minutes on the call, chatting about his route, trading insults with. He heard both Luke and Jofferyâs rambling. He asked Rhaenyra about the board meeting sheâd complained about, and listened to her answer. He asked you about your studies, and remembered something youâd mentioned three calls ago, and asked a follow-up question about it.
The man had walked into their lives years ago and simply decided, without announcement or conditions, that these were his sons. No performance of it. No documentation. Just- love, extended to fill the available space.
Dream Laenor had disappeared. The thought arrived gently, without bitterness. The dream-Laenor, who had been present mostly in his absence, who Jace had barely known, who had been lost before Jace could understand what losing someone meant. This version was here. This version showed up.
And Jace was, quietly and completely, grateful for that.
The call ended. The dessert finished. The evening moved toward its natural conclusion with the comfortable inevitability of all good evenings. Luke vanished in the direction of his room. Joffrey disappeared with a quantity of snacks that could feed a whole army. Rhaenyra retreated to finish what sheâd started, she always had something she was finishing, this was simply who she was and the penthouse settled into quiet
Which left you and Jace, alone on the balcony.
ââ㝠⌠ăťââ
Kingâs Landing stretched below them without end.
The city was all light from up here, not the individual lights, not streets and windows and the moving points of cars, but the collective glow of it, the warmth of a few million people living their lives in proximity, translated upward into something that looked, from this height, almost like its own kind of fire.
A cool breeze moved through the dark, carrying the cityâs particular nighttime mixture of warm pavement and distant food and the faint, improbable ghost of something floral from a rooftop garden somewhere below. It found its way into Jaceâs curls and did what it wanted with them.
You stood beside him. Close enough that your shoulders touched.
Neither of you spoke. Neither of you needed to. The city was enough, for a while.
Then you broke the silence the way you often did when a thought entered your head.
âDo you think it was real?â
He didnât ask what you meant.
The dreams. The prince and the princess. The battle. The promise made at the edge of the world on the morning of an ending. The specific weight of standing on Dragonstone and knowing.
âI donât know,â he said.
You slipped your hand into his. Your fingers were cool from the night air. He closed his hand around yours.
âBut it felt real,â you said.
âIt did.â
Another silence, this one richer. Weighted, but not heavily, weighted the way a good book is heavy, in a way you want.
âIf it was realâŚâ
Jace looked toward you. The cityâs light caught you from below, softening the angles, turning you luminous in the warm way of a portrait painted with care. The same thing heâd thought this morning returned, effortlessly, as though it had simply been waiting for the right lighting.
Radiant.
The same as the princess from the dream. The same, and also entirely herself.
âIf it was real,â you continued, a smile finding the corner of your mouth, âI think sheâd be happy.â
âWho?â
âThe princess.â
Your fingers squeezed his.
âBecause she got her prince back.â
Something moved in his chest and he felt a giddy sensation.
âAnd he got his princess,â he said quietly.
The smile you gave him in return was the specific, undone kind that he privately thought was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He doubted this would change.
âYou know,â he said, after a moment, âIâve spent all day thinking about the battle.â
âThe Gullet?â
âYeah.â He looked down at the city. âThe part where I died.â
You were quiet beside him.
âAnd?â you said, finally.
He looked back through the floor-to-ceiling windows of the penthouse.
His mother, visible in her office, signing something. The small movement of her hand showing her actions.
Luke in the hallway beyond, typing away at his phone aggressively with determinations of someone looking to win an argument even if he may be wrong.
Joffrey somewhere in his room planning a prank on his mother.
And all of it, all of this life, this ordinary, extraordinary life, glowing warm behind glass thirty floors above a city that had never known a dragon. His family.
âI think that prince wouldâve liked this,â he said.
You followed his gaze.
You understood immediately. He could see it in the way your face softened, not with sadness but with tenderness that recognizes grief and holds it carefully.
A life without war. Without the weight of a crown.
Without sacrifice, the kind that swaps one beloved thing for another in an endless, devastating ledger.
Just family.
Just love.
Just peace.
You rested your head on his shoulder.
He turned his head and pressed a kiss to your hair, slow and quiet.
Neither of you saw it.
But just for a moment, a breath, almost a blink, the glass of the balcony door held a reflection that was not quite yours.
Two figures. Side by side. Dressed in black and red, the colours of a house that had once held the world.
Standing exactly as you were standing. Looking out at exactly what you were looking at.
Smiling.
At each other, and at this, and at everything that had managed, against all odds, to survive.
Then the image dissolved.
The glass held only the room behind it, warm and lit and full of the sound of Luke losing the argument.
And Jace, and you.
Exactly where you were always meant to be.
Š jacefiles - all rights reserved, please refrain from copying, reposting, modifying or translating my work on any platform.
could you perhaps do a aerion arranged marriage fic where he begins closed off but slowly warms up to reader đ
â TO FORGE A FLAME / AERION TARGARYEN
aerion targaryen x peake!reader
SYNOPSIS: a disgraced lady of house peake is given to prince aerion targaryen as punishment for her familyâs treason. forced into dragon colors and courtly captivity, she resists him quietly until cruelty, pride, and dangerous tenderness begin to blur...
WARNING: arranged marriage, power imbalance, aerion targaryen is his own warning...
WORD COUNT: 11k
NOTES: this story is canon divergent. iâm moving the peake rebellion/royal conflict earlier in the timeline so it happens while aerion targaryen is still alive!!!! i wanted to keep the political weight of house peakeâs blackfyre history while giving aerion and lady peake their own very messy, dramatic version of events.
House Peake had once possessed three castles.
Starpike, Dunstonbury, and Whitegrove...three proud black towers upon a field of burning orange, three dark teeth set into the golden mouth of the Reach. In old songs, men said those castles had stood like clenched fists against storm and sword. In older tales still, Peake lords had ridden beneath their banner as though the sun itself had been cut into silk for them, bright and brazen and impossible to ignore.
But songs were kinder than history. History remembered treason. It remembered Daemon Blackfyre. It remembered banners raised for a dragon that had not sat the Iron Throne. It remembered the long red harvest of rebellion, the broken men, the pardons given like knives with velvet handles. It remembered how House Peake had lost Dunstonbury and Whitegrove, and how Starpike remained not as a triumph, but as a warning.
One castle left. One daughter left. One price left to pay.
You stood in your fatherâs solar while rain worried at the narrow windows and the orange banner of your house hung limp upon the wall. Three black castles stared down from the cloth, though two had long since been stripped from your blood. They had remained in the sigil because pride was a stubborn thing. Pride was sometimes all a disgraced house had left.
Your father, Lord Gormon Peake, would not look at you. That was how you knew the worst of it before any word was spoken. He stood with his hands braced on the carved back of his chair, shoulders broad beneath dark wool, his face stern as the stone walls that had raised you. Wax from the royal seal lay broken upon his table. Red wax. Dragon wax. A dead little pool of command.
âThey will not burn Starpike,â he said at last.
His voice was quiet.
You should have been relieved. Instead, the room seemed to narrow around you until the air itself had teeth.
âNo,â you said.
A single word. Barely breath.
Your fatherâs jaw moved once. âThe crown is merciful.â
You looked at the letter. You did not need to read it again. The accusations had already carved themselves behind your eyes.
Renewed correspondence with Blackfyre loyalists.
Refusal of a royal command.
Quiet mustering of strength.
Treason, treason, treason...the old word dressed in fresh ink.
âThe crown is not merciful,â you said, and your voice did not shake. That surprised you. It surprised your father too, for he lifted his eyes then. âThe crown is elegant.â
His expression hardened. âYou will guard your tongue.â
âWhy?â Your hands were folded before you, white knuckled in the sleeves of your gown. âWill they take me twice?â
The silence that followed was so complete that even the rain seemed to hush.
You were beautiful. You had been told so since girlhood, first by nurses with warm hands, then by ladies with calculating eyes, then by men who praised beauty the way merchants praised horses before asking the price. You had the kind of loveliness that made people pause before they remembered themselves. The Reach had shaped you generously...skin like cream warmed by candlelight, a mouth made soft by courtesy and sharpened by restraint, eyes that seemed too watchful for so delicate a face. Your hair, dressed that morning with tiny black pins in honor of your house, gleamed like something poets would have wasted half a page naming.
Beauty had been meant to serve you. Now it had made you suitable for sacrifice.
Lord Gormon looked older than he had the day before.
âYou will go to Kingâs Landing,â he said. âYou will be received at court. You will be betrothed to Prince Aerion Targaryen.â
Prince Aerion.
Even in Starpike, his name had reached you before his person had. Names had a way of traveling when attached to cruelty. Aerion Brightflame, some called him, with admiration or fear or both. A prince with silver hair, violet eyes, and the temper of a dragon half starved. A prince who thought himself more fire than flesh. A prince whose laughter was said to come most easily when another man flinched.
âYou are giving me to him,â you said.
Your father looked away again. That was answer enough. Not marrying. Not offering. Not arranging. Giving. As one gave coin, grain, land, hostages.
âYou will save Starpike,â he said.
And there it was...the softest chain in the world, laid around your throat by a familiar hand.
You thought of the castle beneath your feet. The servants who had carried you as a child. The septa who had taught you your prayers. The kennel boy with the crooked smile. The old cook who still made honeyed oatcakes when grief sat too long at the table. You thought of the smallfolk clustered beneath Peake protection, of children who knew nothing of black dragons or red, nothing of treason written before their birth.
You thought of the banner above you. Orange. Black. Three castles. Soon, you would be dressed in red and black. Not your black. Not your old mourning black, not your proud castle black. Dragon black. Dragon red. Fire and blood laid over you until no one could see what had been there before.
âDid you agree before telling me?â you asked.
Your father said nothing.
You smiled then. It was a small, terrible thing.
âYou did.â
âIt was the only way.â
âNo,â you said softly. âIt was the way that cost you least.â
His hand struck the chair so hard the wood groaned. âYou think I wanted this?â
âI think you wanted Starpike more than you wanted me.â
His face twisted. For one moment, he looked not like a lord but like a father wounded by his child. You might have pitied him, had pity not been too expensive a thing.
âYou are my daughter,â he said.
âYes,â you answered. âThat is why you had something left to trade.â
He turned from you then, and perhaps it was mercy. Perhaps he did not wish you to see his shame. Perhaps he wished not to see yours. But shame was already in the room. It stood beside you like a fourth person. Shame wore your face. Shame wore your colors. Shame had your fatherâs seal beneath its nails.
You crossed to the banner and lifted the edge of it between your fingers. The orange cloth was old but well kept, bright despite the dimness, proud despite history. Three castles. Three losses. Three lies and one truth. You pressed the silk once to your mouth. Not a kiss. A farewell.
The court had received you as though you were honored.
That was the first cruelty.
Kingâs Landing rose before you in heat and stink and splendor, crowned by the Red Keep upon Aegonâs High Hill. Its walls were the color of old blood at sunset. Its towers stabbed the sky like spears thrust upward by dead conquerors. Dragons had made this city, and though dragons no longer darkened the heavens, their memory remained in stone, in banners, in the arrogance of every red clad guard who looked upon your escort and saw not guests, but spoils.
You arrived beneath Targaryen eyes.
There were no chains upon your wrists. There did not need to be. Your gown was fine. Your hair was arranged with care. A cloak of deep red had been placed around your shoulders before you crossed into the yard, its lining black as a ravenâs wing. The ladies who came to receive you praised the richness of it.
âHow splendidly the colors suit you, Lady Peake,â one said.
You lowered your eyes and curtsied.
âHis Grace is generous,â you replied.
A lie, polished until it shone.
Whispers followed you through the Red Keep like little knives drawn from little sheaths.
There she is.
The Peake girl.
Starpikeâs ransom.
A pretty price.
Does she look frightened?
Wouldnât you?
Prince Aerion will tame that pride soon enough.
You had thought yourself prepared for fear. You had not prepared for being watched.
Fear in solitude was one thing. Fear beneath a hundred eyes was another. At court, even breathing became performance. You learned before the first evening bell that grief must be graceful to be forgiven. You must walk as though you had come willingly. Sit as though your chair were not a perch above a pit. Smile as though every courtesy did not have a hook beneath it.
You were placed among noblewomen whose hands glittered with rings and whose voices were soft enough to conceal malice. They asked after Starpike. They asked after your father. They asked whether the journey had been pleasant. One wondered aloud whether the Reach seemed smaller after one had been summoned to court.
You answered each question as you had been taught...gently, neatly, with no word loose enough to be used as rope. Inside, something in you paced. Anger, perhaps. Or terror. They felt much the same when caged.
You first saw Prince Aerion in the hall of the Iron Throne.
He did not enter loudly. Men like him did not need noise.
The court seemed to bend before awareness of him. Heads turned. Conversations thinned. A path opened with the obedience of grass before flame.
He was beautiful in the cruel manner of Targaryens, as though some ancient god had shaped him lovingly and forgotten to give him mercy. His hair was pale as moonlight, his eyes were a deep and venomous violet, and his mouth looked made for both poetry and ruin. He wore black chased with red, a dragon wrought in rubies at his throat. He was not broad like a warrior in old tapestries, nor plain like honest men in fields. He was slender, princely, bright as a blade drawn at dawn.
And he smiled when he saw you. Not warmly. Possessively. As if he had been shown a fine hawk, hooded and delivered.
âSo,â he said, when you were brought before him. His voice was cultured, light, almost amused. âStarpike has a daughter.â
You curtsied. Low enough for obedience. Not low enough for surrender.
âMy prince.â
His gaze moved over you with insulting leisure. Not the clumsy hunger of a drunken knight. Not even desire, precisely. Assessment. Appraisal. He looked at your face, your throat, the red cloak swallowing the last visible traces of your house, and understood at once what had been done. So did you.
To him, you were no bride. You were proof. House Peake made flesh. Treason dressed in silk. A living banner lowered before the dragon.
âHow lovely,â Aerion murmured. âThey told me you were fair, but men so often grow generous when describing hostages.â
The word landed softly. Hostage. No one gasped. No one corrected him. That was the second cruelty. You felt every eye in the hall turn sharper.
You lifted your chin by the width of a prayer.
âThen I am pleased not to disappoint, my prince.â
His smile deepened. There. Something kindled behind his eyes. Interest. Not affection. Not admiration. Interest, like a boy discovering an ant did not die when pressed beneath his thumb.
âCareful,â he said. âCourtesy becomes a dangerous weapon in the hands of traitors.â
âMy hands are empty.â
âFor now.â
A few courtiers laughed because he wished them to. You did not.
Aerion stepped closer, close enough that you could see the fine stitching at his collar, red thread biting through black.
âLittle traitor,â he said, almost fondly.
The hall heard. It was meant to.
Your face did not change.
âMy prince,â you answered again.
And for the first time, his smile flickered. A lesser man might have wanted tears. Aerion, you would learn, wanted the moment before them.
In the days that followed, he taught the court how to look at you.
That was his first art .
He did not rage. He did not shout. He did not drag you by the arm through corridors or break cups against walls. Such things were for coarse men, men ruled by appetite and weather. Aerionâs cruelty wore perfume and jewels. It came gloved. It sat beside you at supper and corrected your posture with a touch light enough to seem tender from afar.
When Lord Caswell asked whether you had found comfort in the Red Keepâs sept, you opened your mouth to answer.
Aerion spoke first.
âMy lady-wife-to-be finds comfort wherever she is commanded to find it.â
Laughter, soft and obedient.
You lowered your gaze to your plate.
âHis Graceâs sept is very fine,â you said.
Aerion leaned back, smiling. âSee? She learns.â
When a lady of the Westerlands praised the embroidery at your sleeve and asked whether the pattern was of the Reach, Aerion lifted your wrist before you could move.
âNot the Reach,â he said. âDragons. I had her old colors put away. Sentiment is how treason keeps its roots.â
His thumb pressed once against the delicate bones of your wrist.
Not enough to hurt. Enough to remind.
You smiled at the lady, âPrince Aerion has been most attentive.â
His eyes cut to you. You had made the words too sweet. Just enough sugar to curdle.
That night, your maid found you kneeling beside your chest with a strip of orange silk in your lap. Not much. A ribbon torn from the lining of an old gown, small enough to vanish beneath finery.
âMy lady,â she whispered, frightened.
âHush, Betha.â
âIf he seesââ
âHe sees everything,â you said.
Your fingers did not tremble as you stitched the orange and black beneath the inner seam of your sleeve, where it would rest against your skin and no courtier could praise or mock it.
âThen why risk it?â
You drew the thread through cloth.
âBecause there must be some part of me he has not been handed.â
There were judgments twice that week. Aerion made you sit beside him for both.
The first was a knight accused of carrying letters westward to men who still drank to the Black Dragon when doors were barred. The second was a household steward from a minor Reach house whose cousin had served your father. The hall was cold despite summer heat. The accused men stood below the dais, pale and sweating, while courtiers craned for a better view.
Aerion offered you his arm before the court.
You took it because refusing would be spectacle, and spectacle was always his chosen ground.
âHow fortunate you are here,â he murmured as he led you to the raised seats. âYou may learn what becomes of men who mistake old loyalties for living ones.â
âI have learned many things at court, my prince.â
âHave you?â
âYes.â
âName one.â
You sat beside him, hands folded, face still.
âThat mercy is loudest when it wishes to be admired.â
His eyes found yours. For a breath, the hall seemed to tilt. Then Aerion smiled.
âCharming,â he said. âYou must say such things more often. I do enjoy wondering whether to be pleased or offended.â
âWhichever serves you best, my prince.â
His smile did not fade, but something sharpened beneath it.
During the judgments, he watched you more than the condemned.
He watched when the steward begged. He watched when the knight denied knowing any Blackfyre sympathizers, though his voice broke over the lie. He watched when punishment was pronounced. Not death. Not that day. Mutilation for one. The Wall for another.
Your stomach turned itself to ice. You did not look away. That, too, displeased him. Or pleased him. With Aerion, the two were often twins.
At feasts, he made you ask permission.
âTo leave, my prince?â
His goblet paused near his mouth. âAlready?â
âThe hour is late.â
âIs it? I had not noticed.â
The table listened.
You stood beside his chair, every inch the graceful lady, every inch the captive thing.
âMay I be excused?â
Aerion looked up at you with lazy delight. âYou may.â
A murmur passed down the table. As you turned, his voice followed.
âLittle traitors tire easily.â
You stopped. Only for a heartbeat. Then you looked back and smiled.
âThen your mercy in allowing me rest shall be praised all the more.â
His goblet touched his lips. His eyes burned over the rim.
You refused wine from his hand once. Only once, and before too many witnesses.
He offered it during a supper where singers played beneath the gallery and heat pooled under the high windows.
âDrink,â he said.
The cup was his own. Gold. Dragon handled. Red wine dark as blood. You looked at it. Then at him.
âI thank you, my prince, but I am not thirsty.â
The hall seemed not to notice. Aerion did.
His fingers tightened on the stem.
âAre you afraid I have poisoned it?â
âOf course not.â
âThen drink.â
You let the silence stretch just long enough to become visible. Then you took the cup. But you did not drink. You lifted it, bowed your head slightly, and set it untouched beside your plate.
Aerion laughed. It was a beautiful sound. That was perhaps the worst of it. The court laughed with him, relieved to discover they were allowed. But after that, he watched your mouth whenever you drank from anything else.
You had not won. There was no winning in a cage. But you had denied him something small, and the denial lived between you like a candle refusing to go out.
Then came the dancing.
The court loved dancing because it could pretend cruelty was ceremony if music played beneath it.
Aerion chose you before the hall had grown warm. He crossed the floor with all the ease of a prince born beneath chandeliers, and every lady near you lowered her eyes in envy or pity. Perhaps both.
âMy lady Peake,â he said, extending his hand. âYou will dance.â
Not would you. Not may I.
You placed your hand in his.
âMy prince.â
His fingers closed around yours and the music began.
He danced as he did all things...beautifully, precisely, with a violence hidden so deep in grace that only the person held by him could feel it. He guided you through each turn as though displaying a conquered banner. His hand at your waist did not bruise. It did not need to. Every watching eye understood the claim.
âYou are very quiet tonight,â he said.
âI feared I might interrupt myself.â
His mouth curved. âWas that wit?â
âOnly obedience, my prince. You so often speak for me that I presumed I should leave room for you.â
His grip tightened. There it was again, not anger, not quite. Interest, irritation, appetite.
âYou dislike being looked at,â he said.
You turned beneath his arm, red skirts sweeping the floor like spilled flame.
âI dislike being mistaken for an object.â
âHow unfortunate.â
âYes,â you said. âFor the object, especially.â
He drew you closer on the next step, too close for propriety, not close enough for scandal.
âYou think yourself brave.â
âNo.â
âNo?â
âI think myself watched. There is a difference.â
Aerion stared at you. For one strange moment, his face altered. Not softened. Never softened. But sharpened inward, as though you had placed before him a puzzle he resented wanting to solve.
Then the music ended. He bowed over your hand and kissed the air above your knuckles.
âTo be watched,â he said, low enough that only you heard, âis the first lesson of belonging to me.â
You wanted to say you did not belong to him. You wanted to say no vow had been spoken, no cloak placed, no bedding witnessed, no gods called down to bind you.
Instead, you curtsied.
âMy prince.â
The tourney was held three days before the wedding. The court called it celebration. You knew better. It was rehearsal.
You were seated among noble ladies beneath a canopy of red and black silk, your gown chosen by Aerion himself. Black velvet, red sleeves, rubies at your throat like drops of conquered blood. Beneath the left sleeve, hidden against your skin, the little seam of Peake orange scratched softly whenever you moved.
A secret. A wound. A prayer.
âYou look splendid,â Lady Mooton said beside you.
âDragon colors do wonders for her,â another replied.
You smiled.
The stands were crowded bright with banners. Gold lions, green towers, purple grapes, silver trout, crimson dragons. Knights rode below in painted armor, lances raised, horses tossing plumed heads. Trumpets split the air. Sunlight glanced off helms and made every man seem briefly holy.
Aerion shone most of all...
He entered the lists in armor dark as polished night, chased with red and gold flame. His helm bore the three headed dragon. The crowd loved him because beauty and danger were easy to adore from a safe distance. He raised his lance, and applause moved through the stands like wind through wheat.
You clapped when the ladies clapped. You smiled when eyes turned toward you. You performed loyalty with hands that felt far away from your body.
Then Ser Duncan the Tall entered the lists. The laughter began almost at once. He was enormous, awkwardly noble in a way the court did not know how to forgive. His armor was plain and ill matched. His horse lacked ornament. No great house colors streamed behind him, no ancient blood announced him before his name could. He looked like a man who had walked out of the earth itself and been told, too late, that the sky belonged to princes.
âA hedge knight,â someone behind you whispered.
âSeven save him. Does he know who he faces?â
âLook at his shield.â
âLook at his boots.â
A lady near you laughed behind her fan. The sound scraped against your nerves.
You looked toward Aerion. You tried to keep your gaze there, where duty had placed it. He sat straight in the saddle, radiant, careless, adored. Born to be watched. Born to be praised. Born to turn the worldâs gaze into a mirror and find himself glorious in it.
Below, Dunk adjusted his grip on his lance. Men laughed louder. And he did not answer to it. That was the first thing you noticed. Not his height. Not his plainness. Not the absurd courage of standing where everyone expected him to fall. His restraint.
The herald called and then the horses charged.
Aerion rode like a song of war. Swift, bright, terrible. His lance struck cleanly, and the crowd roared. Dunk swayed but did not fall. When he returned for the next pass, dust clung to him. Someone shouted that hedge knights were harder to knock down because mud loved its own.
The ladies laughed again. Your hands tightened in your lap. Another pass. Then another.
Dunk fought plainly, without flourish. There was no cruelty in him. No hunger to humiliate. When Aerion pressed him hard, sharper than sport required, Dunk did not answer with spite. When the crowd mocked him, he did not spend his strength hating them. He endured.
That was what undid you. Not admiration. Recognition.
You knew what it was to stand dressed for judgment before people waiting to see how well you would bleed. You knew what it was to be laughed at softly because open laughter would be indecorous. You knew what it was to be outnumbered by eyes.
Then came the moment. Aerionâs horse turned too sharply after a pass. Perhaps the ground betrayed him. Perhaps pride did. He slipped in the saddle, only slightly, but enough. Dunk had the angle. He could have taken advantage. He did not.
Instead, he checked his horse. A murmur passed through the crowd. It was nothing, perhaps. A small mercy. A little courtesy in a world that hoarded them. But to you, it seemed enormous.
Before thought could become caution, before fear could clap a hand over your mouth, you leaned forward.
âWell struck!â you said.
You did not shout it loud but clear enough. The ladies around you went still. One fan snapped shut. Someone gave a small, delighted laugh. You realized what you had done before the words had finished dying. The red and black on your body seemed suddenly brighter than flame. Every ruby at your throat became an accusation. You could feel the women near you looking from your gown to the field, from the field to your face.
Then you looked at Aerion.
He had heard.
His horse stood motionless beneath him. His helm was lifted. Across the lists, across banners and dust and sunlight, his face had gone completely still. No anger. No yelling. No visible wound. Only stillness. It was worse than wrath. Wrath had shape. Wrath could be prepared for. This was a door closing in a room you had not known you stood inside.
For one moment, Aerion looked not like a man, nor even a prince, but like the carved image of some beautiful god to whom a village had forgotten a sacrifice.
Then he forced a smiled. And you knew, with a coldness that began in your bones, that he had not forgiven you.
To you, the words had been pity. No. Not pity. Something cleaner than that. You had seen a man mocked and alone, and for one unguarded heartbeat, you had reached toward him with the only mercy available to you.
To Aerion, it was humiliation.
His betrothed, dressed in his colors, seated before the court as proof of his claim, had praised a hedge knight. A lowborn man. A man with no old blood, no dragon, no splendor, no fear coiled like incense around his name. Worse than praise, it was judgment. As though you had looked upon Aerionâs brilliance and Dunkâs plain honor and found the prince wanting.
You knew this before he spoke to you. You knew because he did not speak to you for the rest of the day.
After the tourney, Aerion grew cold. Not absent. Absence would have been easier. He remained everywhere...at meals , in corridors, in the breath held conversations of courtiers who waited for punishment like boys waiting for war. But he withdrew the sharp warmth of his cruelty and left you with courtesy polished to ice.
He sent notes instead of coming himself.
Lady Peake will attend supper at the hour of the bat.
Lady Peake will wear black tomorrow.
Lady Peake is excused from the gardens.
Lady Peake.
Not little traitor.
Not hostage.
Not even my lady.
It should have been relief. It was not.
His cruelty had frightened you, humiliated you, angered you until you lay awake with your hands clenched beneath the coverlets. But cruelty, at least, had seen you. His coldness passed over you like light over glass. You became an object again, but no longer an interesting one. That hurt. You hated that it hurt.
At dinner, he sat beside you and did not look at you once. When Lord Rowan asked whether the wedding preparations pleased you, Aerion replied before you could.
âLady Peake is grateful for whatever she is given.â
His tone was mild. Perfect. Not a single person could call it cruel.
You folded your hands beneath the table.
âI am instructed daily in gratitude,â you said.
Aerion lifted his cup. His eyes did not move to yours.
âNot well enough, it seems.â
The words were soft. They cut anyway.
You tried to apologize the next evening.
Not because you believed yourself guilty of desiring another man. Not because you had meant insult. But because the court had sharpened your small mercy into a blade and placed it between you.
You found Aerion in a gallery where the sunset poured blood red through narrow windows. For a moment, with the light behind him, he looked winged.
âMy prince.â
He did not turn.
âI wished to speak about the tourney.â
âHow tiresome.â
You swallowed. âI did not mean to shame you.â
At that, he looked back. The beauty of him struck you again, as it always did, with unwilling force. He was almost too finely made for decency. Men should not be so lovely and so cruel. It confused the soul.
âNo?â he asked.
âNo.â
âYou praised him by accident, then?â
âI spoke without thought.â
âA dangerous habit for a traitor.â
Your throat tightened.
âI was not cheering against you.â
Aerion crossed the space between you slowly. That was his way. He never rushed toward cruelty. He let dread arrive first and open the door for him.
âNo,â he said. âOf course not. You were merely moved by the sight of your hedge knight.â
âHe is not mine.â
His eyes flashed then, at last. There was the wound. There and gone again.
âSave your pity,â he said, voice low enough that no servant beyond the archway could hear. âYou spent enough of it on your hedge knight.â
The words struck harder than they should have. Because they were wrong. Because they were almost right. Because how could you explain that it had not been Dunk himself, but the loneliness around him? How could you say, Everyone was laughing, and it was cruel, without naming Aerion chief among the cruel? How could you tell a dragon that you had flinched from fire?
âI meant no insult,â you said again, but the words were pale little things.
Aerion leaned close.
âI know what you meant,â he said.
But he did not. That was the tragedy. He did not.
The days before the wedding folded themselves into silence.
You continued as court required. You dressed. You sat. You smiled. You answered when spoken to and held your tongue when Aerion chose to speak over you. But something in you had gone quieter. Not broken. No, never that. Your pride remained, cold and bright, hidden like orange thread beneath dragon cloth. Yet the court had become heavier. The whispers more piercing. The future nearer.
Betha wept one morning while lacing your gown.
âStop,â you said gently.
âI am sorry, my lady.â
âDo not give them tears on my behalf. They are greedy enough.â
She laughed once, miserably, and wiped her face.
You touched her hand. âI am not dead.â
âNo,â she whispered. âBut they are burying you.â
You had no answer.
That evening, Aerion noticed. Of course he noticed. He noticed everything and pretended not to. He noticed when your replies shortened by a word. When you ate less fish than before. When you turned your wrist inward to hide the seam where orange silk laid beneath your sleeve. When your smile remained perfect but ceased to reach the place beneath your eyes where real feeling sometimes betrayed itself.
It irritated him. That was what he told himself.
Lady Peake was dull when subdued. Lady Peakeâs quiet defiance had been more diverting than this careful, bloodless courtesy. Lady Peake had no right to change in any manner he had not commanded.
So he cornered Betha outside your chamber.
The girl nearly dropped the folded linens in her arms when she saw him.
âMy prince.â
âIs your lady ill?â
Betha stared. âIll?â
Aerionâs gaze was sharp enough to skin. âDo not repeat me like a trained bird.â
âNo, my prince. She is not ill.â
âThen why does she wander about like a ghost in borrowed colors?â
Betha went very still. A wiser servant would have lowered her eyes and lied. Betha was frightened. But she loved you.
âShe meant no insult, my prince.â
Aerionâs expression hardened at once.
âDid she send you to plead for her?â
âNo.â Betha shook her head quickly. âNo, my prince. She would be angry if she knew I spoke.â
âThen do not.â
The girl should have obeyed. She did not.
âShe did not cheer because she favored Ser Duncan.â
Aerionâs mouth curved without mirth. âHow loyal of you to explain your ladyâs heart to me.â
âShe cheered because everyone was laughing at him,â Betha said, voice trembling now. âBecause he was alone, and they wanted him shamed, and still he tried to stand with honor.â
Aerion said nothing.
Betha clutched the linens tighter.
âMy lady said she knew how that felt.â
There are some silences that fall. This one opened.
Aerion remained very still. He had remembered your voice as betrayal. Your praise as desire. Your pity as judgment. He had held the moment like a coal and fed it his pride until it burned hot enough to warm his anger. But now the memory altered. The stands. The laughter. Your face turned toward the field, unguarded for once. Not admiring. Not yearning. Stricken.
You had not looked at Dunk and chosen him. You had looked at him and seen yourself. And afterward, Aerion had punished you by making you lonelier.
His anger did not vanish.
Aerionâs pride was not a candle to be blown out by one servantâs trembling confession. The humiliation remained. The court had still heard you. The ladies had still laughed behind their fans. The wound still knew its own shape. But beneath it, something unfamiliar moved. Not remorse. Not yet. Something sharper because it had no name yet.
The wedding came beneath a sky white with heat.
The Sept of Baelor rang with bells and you thought they sounded like iron.
They dressed you in Targaryen colors. Red silk fell over your body in gleaming folds, black lace webbed your sleeves, rubies flashed at your throat and ears and wrists. Your beauty became a weapon in other hands. The ladies praised you until praise itself felt like mockery.
âNo bride in the realm could rival you,â one sighed.
âHow fortunate Prince Aerion is.â
âHow fortunate Lady Peake is.â
That last one nearly made you laugh. Instead, you looked into the polished silver mirror and saw a stranger conquered in red.
Betha stood behind you, pale and silent.
âInside the left sleeve,â she whispered.
You lowered your gaze. There, hidden where no court could see, she had sewn the smallest strip of orange cloth, crossed by black thread in the shape of a tower. It rested near your wrist. Near your pulse.
Starpike. Dunstonbury. Whitegrove.
One living. Two lost. All remembered.
âThank you,â you said.
Betha bowed her head, and you pretended not to see her tears.
When you entered the sept, every face turned.
The walk to the altar was not long. It felt endless. Lords and ladies filled the sacred space in jeweled rows, their eyes bright with hunger for beauty, scandal, surrender. Your father stood among them, dressed in Peake orange darkened almost to rust. His face was carved from stone. You wondered whether he saw you as daughter or bargain fulfilled.
Aerion waited beneath the gaze of the Seven. He wore black. Of course he did. Black, slashed with red, a dragon brooch burning at his shoulder. His silver hair caught the light and made of him something unearthly, something too bright for human tenderness. When his eyes found you, they moved at once to your sleeve.
A flicker. He saw. Of course he saw. Your hidden colors might as well have been a banner unfurled from the sept roof.
For one moment, you feared he would expose you. That he would take your wrist before all the court and turn the seam outward, laughing as he stripped even that last private rebellion from you.
Instead, he smiled.
He leaned close when you reached him, his breath stirring the veil beside your cheek.
âDo try not to cheer for another man today.â
The words entered you like a needle. You looked ahead, face still.
âI shall endeavor to remember the occasion, my prince.â
âNot prince,â he murmured. âNot for much longer.â
The septon began. You heard very little. Words rose and fell above you like birds crossing a battlefield. Duty. Union. Loyalty. The eyes of gods and men. Cloaks. Houses. Peace.
Peace.
What a strange name men gave to a womanâs surrender.
Aerion placed the cloak around your shoulders. Targaryen red and black covered you completely. The court watched House Peake disappear.
When it came time for vows, your mouth obeyed because your body had been trained for obedience long before this day. The words tasted of ash.
âWith this kiss, I pledge my love.â
Love.
The sept did not crack open. The gods did not strike anyone down.
Aerionâs hands were cool when they took yours. His face was close. Too close. Beautiful enough to grieve over, cruel enough to fear.
When you had to say the word husband, it caught. Only slightly. Only enough for him. His eyes sharpened. Then he kissed you. Not roughly. Not tenderly. Publicly.
The kiss was brief and exact and devastating because all kisses before witnesses belonged partly to the crowd. The court sighed as though they had seen romance. They had seen conquest and called it holy.
When Aerion drew back, his gaze remained on your mouth. For one moment, something passed through his expression that was not mockery. Then applause filled the sept like wings beating in a cage.
The feast was a mercy performed by executioners. Everyone toasted peace. Everyone toasted loyalty. Everyone toasted the wisdom of the crown, the humility of House Peake, the generosity of House Targaryen, the radiant beauty of the bride, the splendor of the groom.
No one toasted the truth.
You sat beside Aerion beneath a canopy of red and black. Your hidden orange thread scratched your wrist whenever you moved. You were grateful for the pain. It reminded you that you were still inside your own skin.
âStarpike has given its fairest jewel to purchase forgiveness,â Lord Costayne said, raising his cup.
A murmur of approval.
You smiled.
âThen may the jewel prove worth more than the debt, my lord.â
He blinked, uncertain whether he had been honored or rebuked. Aerion laughed softly beside you.
Later, a lady with pearls netted through her hair leaned forward.
âYou truly do look better in dragon colors, my dear. Orange is such a difficult shade. So loud.â
You touched the stem of your goblet.
âLoud colors are useful, my lady. They make it difficult for history to pretend one vanished quietly.â
The ladyâs smile thinned.
Aerion turned his head toward you and you felt his attention like heat. Then a young knight, too drunk on wine and his own courage, called from lower at the table, âHow quickly traitor houses learn gratitude!â
Silence trembled.
Your fatherâs face darkened. You did not look at him. You looked at the knight.
âHow fortunate, then,â you said, voice gentle, âthat loyal houses are born knowing courtesy, lest they be forced to learn it from traitors.â
A few people coughed. Someone laughed before disguising it badly. The knight flushed scarlet.
Aerionâs fingers rested beside his cup. He tapped once against the table.
âYou are bold tonight,â he said.
You turned to him.
âI am married now, husband. Surely I am permitted one virtue.â
The word husband landed between you. Not soft. Not at all willing. A blade wrapped in silk.
Aerionâs eyes darkened.
âCareful,â he murmured.
âAlways,â you replied.
He watched you for a long while after that. Not with anger alone. Never that simple. Fascination had begun to eat at him, little by little. You were not what he had expected. You did not break loudly enough to satisfy. You did not plead prettily enough to amuse. You answered cruelty with such perfect grace that the cruel began, by comparison, to look vulgar.
Aerion hated vulgarity. He hated, too, that you could make him feel crude without once disobeying him.
The bedding was called for near midnight.
Voices rose, wine thick and eager. Men laughed too loudly. Women smiled with that peculiar cruelty women were taught to hide beneath custom. Someone shouted that dragons need no encouragement. Someone else called for the brideâs cloak to be taken.
Your whole body went cold. You had known it might come. Knowing did not lessen the horror. All day, you had been watched. Measured. Claimed. Now they wanted to turn even your fear into entertainment.
Aerion stood. The hall quieted by degrees. At first, a few men laughed, thinking him ready to play his part. Then they saw his face.
âNo,â he said
One word. Flat as a drawn blade.
âMy prince?â a lord ventured, smiling uncertainly.
Aerion looked at him. The smile died.
âNo man here touches my wife.â
My wife.
You hated the claim. You hated the relief that followed it. It washed through you so swiftly you nearly swayed. You despised yourself for that, too. That mercy could come dressed as ownership. That protection could sound so like possession. That a cage door could remain locked and still keep wolves out.
Aerion offered you his hand. This time, you took it without delay. His fingers closed over yours. He led you from the hall through a silence richer than music. Only when the doors shut behind you did you breathe.
The wedding chamber was dark except for the hearth. Servants had filled it with flowers, as if sweetness could disguise fear. Roses, myrtle, lilies. Their perfume lay heavy in the air, too lush, too living. The marriage bed stood draped in red.
You looked at it once. Then away.
Aerion dismissed the attendants. Betha looked at you before she left. You gave the smallest nod you could manage.
Then the door closed. No court. No ladies. No father. No one to watch how well you endured. Only Aerion. Only your husband.
He stood by the hearth, removing his gloves finger by finger. The ordinary motion felt unbearable.
âYou are trembling,â he said.
You clasped your hands before you.
âThe room is cold.â
âNo, it is not.â
You said nothing. He came toward you. Slowly. Always slowly. Your body remembered every public humiliation, every soft insult, every command dressed as courtesy. It remembered the wedding cloak. The feast. The laughter. The men calling for the bedding.
Aerion stopped close enough to touch you. He did not.
His gaze moved over your face. Whatever he saw there displeased him. Or perhaps it pleased him too much.
âI do not take trembling things to bed,â he said.
Cruel words. Merciful meaning.
Your breath caught. He saw that too.
His mouth twisted. âDo not look grateful. It makes you dull.â
âI would not dream of boring you, husband.â
The word came bitter this time. His eyes narrowed. Then, to your astonishment, he turned away.
âSleep.â
You stared.
Aerion crossed to a chair near the fire and sat as though the matter were settled.
âMy princeââ
He looked back sharply.
âHusband,â he corrected.
The word burned. You lowered your eyes.
âHusband,â you said, and hated the tremor in it.
Something moved across his face. Not triumph, though he might have made it so. Not tenderness. Something uncertain.
âSleep,â he said again, quieter.
You did not understand him. That frightened you almost more than cruelty. Cruelty had rules. Terrible rules, but rules. Aerionâs restraint was a door opened onto darkness. You did not know what waited beyond it.
Still, you slept. Poorly. In your wedding gown. With orange thread hidden against your skin and a dragon seated awake beside the fire.
Marriage did not soften Aerion. Not in the way songs might have begged it to. He remained cruel.
He still called you little traitor when the mood took him, though less often before those whose laughter displeased him. He still corrected you in public when he wished to feel the shape of his power. He still made you wear red and black to court, still watched every room understand that you had been claimed.
But the cruelty changed. It turned inward. Grew intimate. Complicated itself.
He sent gifts. A necklace of garnets dark as old wine. Gloves stitched with silver thread. A comb of carved ivory. A gown so fine the fabric seemed made from midnight poured over flame. No notes came with them. No tenderness. Only objects laid before you like offerings from a god too proud to kneel.
âWhat does he expect me to say?â you asked Betha one morning, looking down at a pair of earrings shaped like dragons biting their own tails.
Betha hesitated. âThank you? â
âI have thanked executioners for cleaner cuts.â
Yet you wore the earrings and Aerion noticed.
At supper, he looked at your ears once and said nothing. But for the rest of the evening, his mood sharpened into something dangerously bright, as though your obedience had pleased him and his pleasure offended him.
He protected you, too, though never sweetly.
When a lord who had drunk too much leaned close enough for his breath to touch your cheek, Aerion appeared at your shoulder.
âStep back,â he said.
The lord laughed nervously. âMy prince, I meant onlyââ
âI did not ask what you meant.â
The man stepped back.
Later, you had said, âI did not need rescuing.â
âNo. You needed better enemies. That one was beneath you.â
You looked at him, startled. Aerionâs face closed at once.
âDo not preen. It was not praise.â
âOf course not, my prince.â
âHusband.â
You turned away.
âMy prince.â
His silence followed you for the rest of the corridor.
You continued your small rebellions.
You called him my prince when no ceremony forced otherwise. You kept Peake colors hidden in seams, ribbons, underthings, once even a black thread braided through an orange ribbon tied beneath your hair where only Betha could see. You refused to cry where Aerion might witness it. You answered insults with courtesy so fine it cut the hand that received it.
And Aerion continued to notice contradictions in himself with mounting disgust.
He noticed when you were tired and ordered you to bed as though annoyance, not concern, moved him. He noticed you preferred pears to figs and had them placed near your plate, then mocked you for looking surprised. He noticed you lingered near windows facing west. He noticed you did not sing, though once, passing your chamber, he heard you humming very softly through the door. He stood outside for longer than he should have. When he realized it, he left angry. Not at you.
That was new and intolerable.
Something had begun in him, something he had no language for except possession. He wanted your attention and called it obedience. He wanted your smiles and called it vanity. He wanted your trust and had no idea what name to give such a foolish, defenseless thing.
Aerion knew fear. He knew how to summon it. How to feed it. How to wear it in anotherâs eyes like a jewel. He did not know how to be wanted without command. So he tried to purchase softness. Jewels. Silks. Protection. Power displayed at your feet like severed heads. You accepted none of it the way he wished. That made him want more.
The first time you realized he cared, he did not say it.
Aerion was not a man made for confession.
It happened at a feast held for visiting lords from the Reach, where every cup was filled too often and every courtesy had a second meaning. You sat beside Aerion in black velvet, a red girdle at your waist. Beneath it, hidden against your ribs, lay a scrap of orange silk.
Lord Ambrose, a cousin to some house that had never risked enough to be punished for anything, raised his cup with a smile too broad to be kind.
âTo Lady Peake,â he called. âWho has traded orange and black for worthier colors. A wise exchange. Some houses must lose honor before they learn taste.â
Laughter pricked the hall.
Your face remained still. Inside, something old and tired folded around itself. You had answered such insults before. You could answer this one. A graceful phrase. A little blade. A pretty smile over a bleeding thing.
But before you spoke, Aerion stood. The laughter thinned and you turned to him. At first you saw only his face, pale and remote, terrible in its calm. Then you saw his sleeve. At the cuff of his black doublet, worked so finely one might miss it until the light found the thread, was a line of orange embroidery.
Your breath stopped.
A black castle pin rested near his heart. Not a dragon. A castle.
The lining of his cloak shifted as he moved, and there, unmistakable, hidden until he chose to reveal it, burned orange silk. Peake colors. On Aerion Targaryen.
The hall understood by degrees. Silence spread outward, table by table, lord by lady, smile by dying smile.
Aerion lifted his cup.
âAn odd thing, Lord Ambrose,â he said, voice silken, âto speak of honor while displaying so little of it.â
The lord went pale.
Aerion continued, almost lazily, âMy wifeâs colors are not yours to mock.â
My wife.
This time the words did not sound only like a cage. They sounded like a shield. A dangerous shield. A possessive shield. A shield with a blade on its rim. But a shield still.
You stared at the orange thread at his cuff.
He sat again as though he had not just overturned the hall. You could barely speak.
âYou should not have done that.â
Aerion looked at you. âDo not look so stricken. They are only colors.â
âNo,â you said softly. âThey are not.â
His face changed then. Only a little. Enough.
âNo,â he said. âThey are not.â
An almost confession. No sweeter words could have undone you so thoroughly.
After that, wanting became a thing with weight. It entered rooms before you did. It stood between you at windows. It sat beside you at feasts. It found you in silences when Aerion looked at your mouth too long and you forgot, for one dangerous breath, every reason to hate him.
You did not forgive him. Not then.
Memory remained. The sept. The cloak. Little traitor. The feast where he made you ask permission to leave. The tourney wound. The wedding night fear. The many small humiliations he had offered the court like entertainment.
But beside memory, another truth had taken root. Aerion could choose restraint. Not easily. Not naturally. Not always. But he could. And sometimes, for you, he did. That frightened you more than cruelty because it asked something of your heart.
Then Starpike rebelled.
The raven came before dawn.
By noon, the Red Keep rang with it.
House Peake had broken faith. Men loyal to your father had stirred in the Reach. Letters had been intercepted, bearing promises to those who still dreamed of a Blackfyre return. Riders had been sent toward Starpike. There were whispers of men mustering beneath old banners, of lords who spoke of rescue, of stolen daughters and dragon tyranny.
Rescue.
The word made you ill.
They had given you away. Now they named the taking theft because rebellion required prettier language than regret.
Your fatherâs message reached you by secret hand, hidden in the binding of a prayer book.
Daughter,
You were taken from us under threat. Blood remembers blood. Starpike has not forgotten you. Endure a little longer. You will be brought home.
Home...
You read it three times. Then once more. Each time, it grew colder. Not one line asked what you wanted. Not one.
You sat by the window until the light faded, the letter open in your lap.
Aerion found you there.
âIs it true?â you asked before he could speak.
He did not pretend confusion. âYes.â
âMy father?â
âYes.â
âAnd they claim it is for me?â
Aerionâs mouth curled. âMen love noble motives. They dress treason in them whenever possible.â
You looked down at the letter.
âThey gave me to you.â
Aerion went still. You had never said it so plainly before.
You lifted your eyes to him.
âThey gave me to you when it saved them. Now they want me back because it serves them. They call that love.â
His expression was unreadable. Perhaps because he heard the accusation beneath it. You too...you also treated me as something to be possessed.
Aerion crossed the room. âI will burn their rebellion to ash.â
âNo.â
His eyes flashed. âNo?â
âPunish the guilty. Not Starpike.â
âStarpike raised banners against my house.â
âStarpike has children in its walls. Servants. Smallfolk. Stable boys and washerwomen and cooks who have never written to a Blackfyre in their lives.â
His voice cooled. âYou ask mercy for traitors.â
âI ask justice for the innocent.â
âYou ask me to spare those who would take you from me.â
You rose then. Fear moved through you, but pride moved with it.
âI ask you not to become the monster they call you.â
The room darkened around his face. For a moment, you thought you had gone too far. Perhaps you had.
Aerion stepped close, violet eyes bright and terrible.
âYou think I fear that word?â
âNo,â you whispered. âI think you have worn it so long you no longer know where it ends and you begin.â
Silence.
His hand lifted. Not to strike. You knew that before it reached you. Yet your body flinched from old expectation, from court, from marriage, from men and power and rooms without witnesses.
Aerion saw.
His hand stopped in the air.
Something broke across his face so swiftly you might have missed it if you had not been watching him for weeks, learning the language of his smallest cruelties and rarer restraints.
He lowered his hand.
âI will punish the guilty,â he said.
Each word seemed dragged from him by iron hooks.
âStarpike will stand if it yields.â
Relief nearly took your knees.
âThank you.â
His laugh was harsh. âDo not thank me. Mercy tastes foul enough without gratitude.â
But he had listened. That was the beginning of the end of one thing, and the beginning of something far more dangerous.
Prince Maekar summoned him two days later.
You were not meant to attend. You went anyway.
Perhaps you should not have. Perhaps a wiser woman would have remained behind tapestry and rumor, waiting for men to decide the shape of her life as they always had. But you were tired of being absent from rooms where your fate was discussed.
You entered quietly enough to hear Maekarâs voice before either man saw you.
âShe has made you weak.â
Aerion stood before his father in the solar, spine straight, face pale with fury held on a leash. Maekar was hard where Aerion was bright, iron where his son was flame. A prince made of discipline and expectation, with a soldierâs contempt for softness.
âThe Peakes defied the crown,â Maekar said. âYour wife was meant to remind them of obedience, not teach you hesitation.â
âMy wife asked that Starpike be spared if it yields.â
âYour wife,â Maekar repeated, and the word was scorn. âA traitorâs daughter.â
Aerion smiled. It was the kind of smile you had once feared most.
âChoose your next words carefully.â
Maekar stepped closer.
âYou dare warn me? You wear her colors before court. You let lords see you marked by a disgraced house. You speak of restraint while rebels gather courage from the thought that Aerion Targaryen can be softened by a pretty face.â
Your breath caught.
Aerionâs head tilted.
âDo you imagine beauty is all she has?â
Maekarâs hand twitched.
âYou were always vain enough to mistake possession for strength.â
The words struck Aerion. You saw it, though he hid it well.
Maekar saw it too.
âThat is what this is,â his father said. âNot love. Do not flatter yourself with songs. You have found a toy that resists you, and because it does not break when pressed, you have mistaken frustration for feeling.â
Aerion said nothing. His silence was terrible.
Maekarâs gaze moved to the orange thread at his cuff.
âTake those colors off.â
âNo.â
The word was quiet. The room seemed to draw breath.
Maekar struck him. Or would have.
You moved before thought.
There was no courage in it. Not the kind songs praise. No shining calculation. No noble speech. Only the sight of his fatherâs hand rising, and the sudden unbearable knowledge that you did not want the blow to land.
You stepped between them and the slap caught you across the face.
Sound vanished. Everything vanished in that room.
Your head turned with the force of it. Pain bloomed hot along your cheek, bright and humiliating. For a moment you saw nothing but white light and the edge of the table and your own hand gripping it to remain upright.
Then stillness.
Maekar stared at you.
Aerion did not move and you looked at him.
Whatever had been in his face before was gone. He was utterly silent. Shattered into stillness. You had seen Aerion angry. You had seen him amused. You had seen him wounded, proud, vicious, fascinated. You had never seen him afraid. Not for himself. For you.
His hand rose, slowly this time, as if approaching some wounded bird that might die of fright. He did not touch your cheek. Not at first. His fingers hovered near the mark his father had made.
His voice, when it came, was almost unrecognizable.
âLeave us.â
Maekarâs face darkened. âAerionââ
âLeave.â
There was dragonfire in that word.
Maekar looked from his son to you, then back again. Something like understanding passed over his face, grim and displeased. Then he left and the door closed.
Aerion turned to you. For a long time, he said nothing. Then, with care so fierce it looked almost painful, he took your wrist and led you from the room.
His chambers were quiet.
He sat you before the hearth and stood over you as though guarding a battlefield after the slaughter had ended. His fingers flexed once at his side. Then again.
âLet me see,â he said.
You lifted your face. The mark had risen red across your cheek.
Aerion stared at it. Violence meant for him, written upon you. That was the thing he could not bear. Not because you belonged to him. Because you had chosen it.
You had stepped between pain and him with nothing to gain. No court had watched to praise you. No father had commanded it. No vow had required it. You had protected him not because he was gentle, not because he deserved it, not because you had forgotten what he had done.
You had done it because somewhere in the ruin between you, he had become yours too.
Aerion understood fear. He understood obedience. He understood taking, breaking, possessing, punishing. He did not understand this. So it broke him open.
âWhy?â he asked.
A prince, a dragon, a cruel and beautiful creature of fire and pride, reduced to one bare word.
You could have lied. You did not.
âBecause I did not want him to hurt you.â
His throat moved.
âHe has struck me before.â
âI know.â
âThen why would you put yourself in the path of it?â
You looked at him, cheek burning, heart worse.
âBecause knowing does not make it right.â
He laughed once, but it was not laughter. It was a broken exhale.
âI am not good.â
âNo.â
âI have been cruel to you.â
âYes.â
âI frightened you.â
âYes.â
His face twisted. Perhaps he had expected denial. A mercy he had not earned. You gave him truth instead.
âYou humiliated me,â you said softly. âYou made my wedding feel like a sentence. You called me traitor until the word followed me into sleep. You made me wear your colors so everyone would know I had been conquered.â
Aerion closed his eyes, only briefly. When he opened them, they were bright with something more dangerous than tears because he did not know how to shed them.
âAnd yet?â he asked, bitterly.
âAnd yet,â you said, âyou wore mine.â
The silence after that was not empty. It was full of every unsaid thing pressing its hands against the walls.
Aerion knelt before you. The sight of it startled you so deeply you forgot to breathe.
He did not seem to know what to do once there. Gentleness was foreign country to him. His hand lifted again, and this time, with terrible care, his fingertips touched the unmarked edge of your jaw.
âI will kill him for this,â he said.
âMy father?â
âMy father. Yours. Anyone who places a mark on you and calls it duty.â
âYou cannot kill every man who has hurt me.â
His mouth curved, humorless. âI can try.â
Despite yourself, you almost smiled. Almost.
âAerion.â
His name changed the room. You had not used it often. Names were intimate things. Dangerous things.
He looked at you as though you had touched him.
âPunish the guilty,â you said. âSpare Starpike.â
His jaw tightened.
âYou ask again.â
âYes.â
âYou know what they did.â
âI know what they did to the crown. I know what they did to me. I know my father traded me, then called for my return when I became useful again.â Your voice trembled, but did not break. âI am not asking because they are innocent. I am asking because I will not let the innocent burn for their pride.â
Aerion looked at the mark on your face. Then at your eyes.
âMy mercy will not be gentle,â he said.
âI did not expect it to be.â
âNo. You never make that mistake.â
He rose.
When judgment came, it came with teeth. The men who had plotted rebellion were seized. Lords who had written treason in careful hands found those hands bound. Ravens flew. Riders rode. Starpikeâs gates opened before dragon banners, and because they opened, the castle did not burn.
Lord Gormon Peake was brought to heel. Not slain, for you had asked that much with a face still marked by another princeâs hand. But stripped of command. Sentenced before witnesses. His lands watched, his household divided, his pride cut down to a stump.
Aerion stood before court in black and red, with orange at his cuff and a black castle near his heart.
âStarpike stands,â he declared, âbecause my wife asked it of me.â
The hall listened, breathless.
âIf House Peake mistakes her mercy for weakness, I will correct them. If any man claims her name as excuse for treason again, I will teach him the difference between a womanâs compassion and a dragonâs patience.â
No one laughed. No one whispered this time.
You stood beside him, still in Targaryen colors, but not swallowed by them now. Beneath your sleeve, Peake orange rested against your skin. At Aerionâs wrist, it burned where all could see.
For the first time since leaving Starpike, you felt not displayed, but witnessed.
That night, he found you in the garden.
Moonlight silvered the leaves and turned the fountains pale. The city below muttered in its sleep. For once, there were no courtiers. No ladies with fans. No fathers. No banners raised like accusations.
Only you and him him.
Aerion wore no crown, no courtly smile, no easy cruelty. His black cloak was lined in orange. You saw it at once. He saw you see it. This time, he did not mock you.
âYour city wanted you back badly,â he said.
There it was...the cruelty he reached for when fear came too near.
His voice was light. His eyes were not.
âGo, then,â he said. âIf that is what you want. Starpike stands. Your father lives. The bargain has been remade prettily enough for singers to choke on. Go home.â
You looked at him for a long moment.
âYou do not mean that.â
His smile cut. âDo I not ?â
âNo.â
âHow fortunate that you know my mind so well.â
âI know when you are trying to bleed before you can be wounded.â
The smile vanished.
A breeze moved through the garden, stirring the orange lining of his cloak like a small, secret flame.
âI frightened you,â he said.
âYes.â
âI humiliated you.â
âYes.â
âYou hate me.â
You could have said yes. Once, it would have been simple. Now truth had become harder.
âI hated what you did to me,â you said. âI hated the way you made me small. I hated that everyone watched and you let them. I hated that my wedding felt like the end of myself.â
Aerion stood very still.
âBut House Peake made me small too,â you continued. âThey gave me away when it saved them. Then they tried to reclaim me when it served them. They called both duty. They called both love. Neither time did they ask what I wanted.â
âAnd what do you want?â
No command or mockery.
You stepped closer.
âI want to choose.â
His face changed.
You wondered whether anyone had ever offered Aerion a choice that was not also a test, a weapon, or a trap.
âThen choose,â he said.
His voice was rough.
You looked at him...beautiful, cruel, wounded, dangerous. A dragon who had burned you and shielded you with the same fire. He was not redeemed. Not purified. Not made gentle by the shape of your hand. Some part of you would always remember the girl in the sept beneath the red cloak, the hostage in silk, the bride led to the dragonâs mouth.
But you remembered other things too. A bedding refused. A cup left untouched. A black castle near his heart. A prince kneeling before you, undone by the sight of your pain.
You chose yourself first. That was the vow no septon had given you. Then you chose him.
You touched the orange lining of his cloak.
âThese are my colors,â you said.
âYes.â
âYou should not wear them.â
âNo,â Aerion said. âI should not.â
âYou do anyway.â
His gaze dropped to your mouth.
âYes.â
You kissed him first.
It was not like the kiss in the sept. That had belonged to gods and lords and hungry witnesses. This belonged to no one but you. Aerion went still beneath it, as though struck not by force but by wonder. Then his hand rose to your face, careful of the fading mark on your cheek, and he kissed you back with a restraint so fierce it trembled.
He wanted. You felt that. But more than wanting, he waited. That was what broke your heart open.
When you drew away, his forehead nearly touched yours.
The garden was quiet around you.
âMy prince,â you whispered.
His mouth tightened.
Then you corrected yourself.
âMy husband.â
Aerion stopped breathing. The word hung between you, no longer sentence, no longer surrender.
Choice.
He looked at you as if the whole court, the crown, the war, the old stains of blood and treason had fallen away, leaving only one impossible mercy he had not known how to ask for.
âSay it again,â he said.
Not as an order. Almost as a plea.
You touched the orange thread at his cuff.
âHusband.â
And this time, when Aerion closed his eyes, he looked not conquered, but saved from conquest. Only a little and only with you.
summary â while combing the beach for treasures, you stumble upon the unconscious, grievously injured body of a soldier. you decide to help him, but in doing so find love in a man that may never be able to return it. (11.4k)
featured â jacaerys velaryon / fem!reader
content â spoilers! tread carefully, fluff and ANGST, angst w/ a happy ending, hurt/comfort, canon divergent, jace lives, light medical descriptions, reader cares a lot for jace, dual pov!!!, inexplicit mental health struggles (readerâs deceased father), dead vermax âš, 18+ MDNI implied sexual content/fade-to-black, tw there is a baby
a/n â am i anywhere near caught up with hotd? no. did i write this in spite of that? yes. i'm sorry if things don't make sense or are not in line with canon. the wiki and i did our best!
(cross-posted on ao3)
The cerulean waves lap at the silver beach, ebbing and flowing with the morrowâs breeze. Quiet has finally settled on the shores after a night of war and destruction. A battle beyond these argent sands occurred out in the gullet. All night, the savagery had kept you awake. This morrow, you collect treasures from your fish nets.
You step carefully across the sands, adjusting your silk scarf tighter around your mouth and nose. You bend the knee at the first net.
You heave it onto the shore. Nothing except too-small pieces of fabric and inedible shelled fish are in this one. You empty it and release the fish back to the embrace of the sea.
You stand again, taking a few more steps down. Your mind drifts as you fall into a rhythm of checking these nets, pocketing pretty shells and scraps of metal. Wonder pricks at the back of your neck as you imagine the war. As the lone tenant of this pier, you had never had to consider the rites of the Targaryen rulers. Most of your neighbors had already chosen their sides, even if it did not really matter in the scheme of thingsâneither of those fighting for the throne cared for their subjects, especially not those at the bottom, like you.
Rulers like these bled the common man dry while claiming it to be an act of love.
You move a little rougher with the next net. Nothing but rocks and debris in this one. You imagine it will be a while until you find a worthy treat. The Gods are usually not as generous on solemn days like these. War makes monsters out of men, and the Gods scorn those who partake.
When you stand again, your eyes drift a little further down the bank. At the edge of the shore, a clump of trees catch your gaze. The water is darker there, cloaked in shadow. The shrubbery bends so far, it almost touches the water. You draw closer, eyebrows furrowed.
A dark lump sits entangled by brush, barely concealed by the cluster of foliage. You draw closer, hesitantly. As your eyes adjust, you realize it is not a lump of debris, but a body. Your breaths quicken.
If the person is alive, would it hurt you? Never trust a soldier, your father had once told you.
You bend your knee just as if you are checking a fish net. Your hands unfurl from your sides, reaching out hesitantly. You can only see his body. It is clothed in thick leather, a quality of which youâve never seen before. Several arrows stick out of his torso. A pool of blood stains the sand maroon beneath him.
You pull back the shrubbery to see his face. You startle at the sight, falling back onto your bum.
His eyesâthey were openâalbeit, he did not seem to see much of anything. His skin was not grey and placid like the bodies that you had seen before. Worse, youâd heard something when you held yourself over him. A breath, shuddering through his parted lips.
âAlive,â you whisper in awe. To survive so many arrows, then the tumultuous sea⌠it would take more than just courage. It would take something otherworldly. You know then that your decision has been made.
A huge piece of driftwood sits beneath him in the sand. You push it aside to straddle him. Gently, you grab his arm and sling it around your neck.
The rest of your journey back to the cabin passes in a frenzied blur. You move quickly, trying to spend as little time as possible forcing the grievously hurt man onto his feet. He lets out little grumbles as you move, head lolling this way and that like a puppet cut from its strings. You make it inside and push open the door that your father used to live, laying him onto his back on the bed.
Blood immediately infiltrates the off-white of the duvet, crimson floating before your vision. He groans continuously as you break the ends off of the arrowsâserving as a reminder to the heart that still valiantly pumped beneath his ribs. Once they are off, you are able to slide the armor off.Â
The tunic comes easily. It seems to be made of a material that deflects water, so when you drop it onto the floor, a puddle of liquid forms in its spot. You struggle a little with his breechesâthough, those too come easily with a little pull.
After he is naked, you stare at his body in silence for a moment. You have helped men with injuries before. Arrow injuries just like these, even. But youâd never helped a man with this many.Â
You reach out to touch his cold cheek. He is so youngâhad to be your own age. Too young for the cruel, unflinching hold of war. Gently, you close his eyelids, shutting away the dark brown of his unseeing gaze. He did not need to be witness to this.
You steel your nerves and clench your fists a few times to breathe life back into your numb fingers. Reaching into the bedside table, you grab your suppliesâbandages, a bottle of rum, a couple cloths, and several blunt blades.
âIâm sorry, if you are awake,â you tell him, poising the knife along the edge of one of the arrow heads. âThis will hurt a lot.â
Hours pass quickly under your blade. Each of the five arrows is cut away, sewn with fishing line, disinfected with rum, and bandaged tightly. Sweat falls into your eyes as you step away triumphantly, and you lift a hand to brush it off. As they are levelled with your eyes, you realize your hands are a bloody mess. Your stomach churns and you force the appendages away.
You hover over him a moment longer. You study the shallow rise and fall of his chest, the fluttering of his eyelids. He had a strong nose and jaw, thick dark eyelashes and a head of water-matted brunet hair. By all appearances, he was quite common-looking. He had the complexion and hair of any man youâd pass on the way to town. But something about himâthe quality of his armor, the blemishlessness of his skin, it screamed something ethereal.
But even Gods can be killed.Â
Your mystery man is not out of the woods yet. The chances of any of those arrows not nicking anything inside him is next to none. Heâs also lost a lot of blood. The sheets are covered in it, not to mention the amount he was sure to have lost at sea.
You draw the hair sea-slicked to his head away from his forehead. Your hand slides to cup his cheek. He might never wake again. Your kind hand may be the last he knows. You wonder how many people missed himâif they were sitting with baited breaths, waiting for him to write. If only you could ease their worries.
You pull away and leave the room before your eyes can fill with traitorous saltwater tears.
There are few certainties in life. Ever since you were but a child, you had recognized this. Life is tumultuous and unfair. It takes and it takes, until you can give no longer.Â
The sea is a comfort. She does not take, she gives. Usually, she gives you more valuable things than a body, but you try not to question her motives.
Itâs been a day since you patched him and he still has not woken. His chest continues to move despite this disconcerting sign, and that remains your only comfort. You stood near-vigil at his beside for most of the hours following. Anticipatory nerves fill your every waking second, even at night when you lay awake trying to sleep.
You recognize that the danger has not fully passed for him. He had not had water in who knows how long. Eventually, his organs would fail due to dehydration and blood loss. That is, if the internal bleeding didnât kill him first.
You also cannot help the hope that blooms in your chest as you gaze upon his face. Perhaps it is the fact that his skin seems more alive as of late. The fact that you have seen his eyes move behind his eyelids more and more often. The fact that you were quite insufferably lonely, and therefore latched onto any individual who came your wayâalive or barely, as in the case of this man in your cabin.
You want him to survive because you want to know him. It is a thought that scares you as much as it invigorates you.
By his bedside, after a long morrow of scavenging by the tide, you dump your satchel of goodies on the now-clean duvet. (Now that had been annoying to doâhaving to move his admittedly quite heavy body over to remove the sheets). You begin to sort through them, cataloging them.
The silence is unsettling, so you begin to speak.
âThe sea has been kind this morrow,â you say softly. You pick up a smooth rainbow shell, twisting it this way and that in the light. âThese will sell for a couple of silvers.â
You put the shell down and then grab your cloth, gently stroking away sand and debris.
âMy father taught me to do this,â you tell the man, âhe taught me everything I know.â
Satisfied with its shimmer, you trade the shell for a clam. You pop it open forcefullyâapologizing profusely to the creature as you didâand stick your fingers into the dark crevice you created.
âNo pearl,â you report when your fingers come up empty. You bring the clam up to your eyes, stroking its now-broken shell. âIâm sorry, friend.â
The last piece had been one you were excited for. You grab the shrapnel of metal gently in your palms, categorizing the weight and feel of it with your hands.Â
âProbably off a shield,â you decide. âIâm sure a blacksmith would like this.â
You put the metal down and let out a heavy sigh. You stare at the man, worrying your lip between your teeth. Perhaps some foolish part of you had hoped he would wake up to the sound of your voice, like the stories you had read as a girl.
But life is no story, as you had to continually remind yourself. Things like that just didnât happen.
You go through a few other bits and bobs in silence, mood dampened by reality. A couple of small shells, a nail, and a scrap of maroon fabric. You arenât sure why you grabbed the fabricâperhaps youâd wanted to try and sew something. It is quite pretty, you decide. It had belonged to someone once.
Once you finish polishing the items, you lift your head up to look at the man. Thoughts and images flash through your mind. What was he like? You wonder. He seems strong, based on his broad shoulders and defined stomach. But he also didnât have the worn skin of a common man. He didnât have callouses on his hands or fading scars upon his torso. He had to be a prince, you decide. A prince of a faraway land, hoping to bargain peace between the two feuding Targaryen houses.
You nod, satisfied with that recreation of events. Yes, a prince. A just, altruistic one. Perhaps he knew of the war and wished to come and save the small-folk.
You look down at his pale hand resting lifelessly upon the duvet. You swallow thickly.Â
âYou must wake soon,â you whisper, âthe kingdom needs you.â
He does not stir. You sigh and gather your things into your satchel. If he is still not awake by the morrow, you decide, you will return his body to the sea.
That evening, you sit at the table with a plate of roasted fish and a glass of water. The fish is one of two meals you eat regularly. The other was for special occasions, depending on if you were able to procure bread and potatoes at the markets.Â
You always eat the eye of the fish first. You do not like it looking at you as you eat its flesh. It feels wrong. The eye is not very tasty, though. The odd texture always makes you vaguely nauseousâthe gooey, chewy ball. Your father had always laughed at you when you ate fish. He was not of an imaginative mind. He did not see the fish as being once alive, like you did. He did not imagine it swimming beneath the tide, with all its other fishy friendsâbefore it was snared by ruthless hands and suffocated by the open air.
You stare at the vacant chair across from you with an empty feeling in your chest. It had been so long since you had a companion at supper time. Your father had not spoken much, but his presence alone was always enough to keep you happy. He is gone now, like with the ebbing of the tide, and all that is left is the shadow of the person he used to be.
His fishing pole, next to the door. His journal, where he kept extensive notes about what he found out on the sea during the day. His bed that now had a new, warm body sleeping in it.
You wonder what your father would have done, had he found the man. You take another bite of the fish, forcing it down with a thick swallow. Would he have left him? You had never thought of him as being cruel, but you also know he loathed unwelcome responsibility. He had enough of an imagination to conjure horrible images of betrayal and hurt, and so you decide he probably wouldnât have brought him home to you. He had too much to lose to do so. Everyone did.
And so why did you? Perhaps, you think, you have lost everything that matters most to you already.
You stare down at the limp skeleton of the fish on your plate. You had never seen a person die of dehydration. Your father had once told you a story about a man he knew that had, and it sounded awful.Â
You pick up your dinner knife, a sharp, clean-edged blade, and hold it in the candlelight. The silver edge catches the light, highlighting the sharp point. Your hand trembles as you study it.
Would it be quick, painlessâslitting the sleeping princeâs throat? Or would it be messy and painful? Would it draw him out of sleep and would he gaze upon you with hurting eyes as he clutched the gaping hole in his neck?
Regret gnaws at you. As time draws on, you begin to think that the mercy you had granted your prince had been nothing but a farce. That by saving him for one moment had only just prolonged his suffering.
You put the knife in your satchel and stand. It is cruel, keeping a person alive only to die in a violent manner like thisâit is inhumane.Â
You take quick steps to the bedroom.Â
You have never killed a person before. Your father had plenty. He always said the eyes, you can hear his voice in your mind now, the eyes are always the worst part.Â
You canât eat the princeâs eyes like you can the fishâs. No matter what you did, you would have to see those eyes. And with it, the betrayal. You stand over his prone body now.Â
A sliver of moonlight streams in from the open window behind you, casting cool light across the heaving chest. He remains impassive, completely unaware of what you were about to do. You do not realize you are crying until you bring the knife up to your eyes and catch a glimpse of your face in the silver.
âIâŚI am sorry, friend,â you repeat the same mantra you had told so many clams before as you pried your fingers in their mouths, looking for a pearl. âBut this is a mercy.â
Your hands tremble like windblown seagrass as you lift the knife against his skin. A moment of hesitation prevents you from acting. And it is just enough for a pale hand to wrap around your own and for dark eyes to snap open.
âWaaa-ter.â
You let out a sharp gasp and yank your hand away. The man watches you, his visage crumpled with pain.
He repeats himself, voice quieter than the first time. âWater, pleaseâŚâ
You move into action. You dart out of the room, hands fumbling with the metal bucket by your door. You run across the moonlit shore to the well that sits on the edge of the woods. Quickly, you fill the bucket. You curse yourself all the whileâmind racing in what-ifs and guilt-ridden condemnations.Â
You heave the bucket back into the house and grab the same goblet you had used with your own water. You take a huge scoop and shuffle back into the bedroom like a child caught with their hand on the sweets plate.
The man is still awake when you re-enter, his eyes wide and eyebrows furrowed. You drop next to him on the bed and angle his head and neck up onto the pillows behind him. Finally, you fulfill his request. He drinks like a man in Essos who has wandered the Red Waste for weeks; heavy, desperate gulps of the liquid. Some fall and drip down his side, which you dab away with a nearby cloth.
When he finally drinks it all, he pulls back, his breaths labored and eyes half-lidded.
âWâŚWhere am I?â he finally says once he has caught his breath. You notice him scanning the room as if trying to find the answer written in the stone.
You decide not to answer honestly. You fear what his reaction will be if he forces himself to recall the battle. Instead you say, âyou are safe.â
He stares at you as if only just noticing you. His dark eyes are swallowed almost completely by night, exhausted and ridden with heavy bags. He lifts a hand, as if to touch you, but it falls short. His eyes flutter, and then shut.
He falls unconscious. You touch two hands to his chest to confirm his heart still beats steadily. You let out a breath you had not realized you captured when you find his pulse.
Shame hits you like a tidal wave. You were going to⌠you were going to kill him. You are shocked at the tears that swim in your eyes. You stand in a hurryânot without remembering to pull the duvet back up to his chestâand stumble out of the room.Â
The adrenaline has all but worn away now. Tears clog your eyes, slipping down your cheeks. You allow yourself to feel the emotionsâall of them. Relief, shame, exhaustion, and fear overwhelm you completely and you can do nothing but sob. On the table in front of you, the skeleton of the fish and the silver knife mock you without having to say a word.
Waking feels like drowning. Fighting against the wave ahead of you, trying to get your head above water. Then when you finally surface, you fall behind the waves again.
Jacaerys wakes to the sun in his eyes and a warmth around his waist. He thinks for a moment, perhaps, he is in a dream. Another barrier between him and wakefulness. Then, the pain hits him. No, dreams donât feel like this.
The groan stumbles past his lips before he can stop it and his eyes shoot open. Everything is pain. It surrounds him like dragonfire and steals his breath. He trembles as he uses all his strength to cradle his side.
âGods,â he murmurs. He feels beneath his fingers the familiar texture of a bandage. Someone helped him.
Helped him. Helped him from what? He gasps as memory rolls over him. Drowning. Arrows piercing through skin and muscle. A dragonâs roar of pain. No, not just any dragonâ
âVermax,â he cries out, tears springing to his eyes. No, no, noâŚ
But it was true. His mind had never failed him before. His dragon. His beautiful dragon. Falling to the bottom of the ocean like a shipâs anchor. He tries to move, to jump to his feet, but he canât. Pain ricochets up his side, and he can literally feel the side of his chest pulling taut.Â
He stares at the ceiling above him with tears fogging his eyes and coating his tongue in salt. For one long moment, he despairs. Why? Why would he be punished this way? Forced to live without Vermax? The bond between rider and dragon could notâshould not be severed. Not by something as futile as war. He canât breathe, canât think. Everything is despair.
He should have died. Living is not a gift in this condition. His knuckles go white against the duvet. Anger sweeps over himâhot, potent fury.
He curses everyone who caused this. Aemond, Alicent, Aegon, even fucking Helaena. He doesnât care. Theyâll all pay.
But not like this. He finally shuffles himself into a seated position, cringing at the pain that shoots from every direction. Every small movement feels like another arrow tearing his skin.Â
His feet are unsteady as he finds his footing. For a second, he fears he might not be able to even walk. Then, he finds himself. He grabs his breeches off the table and slowly, painfully, shrugs them on. He leaves his chest bareâunable to even think about having to lift his arms over his head. He keeps one hand on the wall and the other around his waist as he stumbles across the room.Â
The place he is in is frighteningly humble. Thereâs nothing unnecessary here. Everything has a purpose, a function. No gilded armoires, tall candlesticks, or commissioned portraits. Bare, cobblestone walls, sparse furniture (all glaringly handmade and rustic), and cobwebs hanging in every corner.Â
Jacaerys moves slowly from the room he started in to the short hallway that opens into a tiny living area. A large fireplace is the only comfort to him. A pot of a molten, unappetizing glob bubbles above the waning fire.Â
There are very few personal effects here. Nothing to propose any kind of hint or insight. Out the window of the front of the ramshackle building, he sees amber light flickering across a wide sea.
His breath shudders out of his lips. He doesn't recognize this place at all. Heâs hurt. He has no dragon. Heâs never felt worse in his entire life.
All of what energy he summoned flees him in that moment. He practically collapses into a nearby chair and it creaks pathetically under his weight. He hangs his head and a soft sob escapes his lips.Â
Tears tremble down his cheeks and onto the wood table beneath his hand. His mind races, memory and pain and fury collide in a war of its very own. Vermax, his mind strays. The perfect dragon. Gone. He digs his nails into the grain of the table beneath his hands, trying to recapture something to ground him. Short, hyperventilating breaths escape his lipsâhis vision fogs.
Then, everything clears. His hands unclench and he leans back in the chair. He stares at the ceiling, measuring his breaths. You are still alive, he tells himself. Therefore you are still useful.
Because perhaps that was his real fear. That he would no longer be of useâthat he would no longer be worth fighting for. Heâd always measured his worth in terms of what he could provide to his mother. Perhaps the truth is that his worth stretches beyond that.
He hears the sound of crunching footsteps outside. He sits up in the chair, eyes flickering toward the door. Ahead of him, he notices with a jolt, a knife lay discarded on the table. He grabs it before he can think the better of it, brandishing it like he actually could fight his way out of this mess.
He ignores the pain throbbing in his side and pushes himself to stand again. He wonât die now. He canât.
The door creaks open slowly, and he angles the knife in front of himself protectively.Â
But the figure that crosses the threshold isnât what heâd been expecting. Wide eyes and a mouth fallen open into an oval. Hands clutching a satchel of⌠is that a seashell?Â
She drops the satchel with immediacy, hands flying into the air. Jacaerys thinks he hears something break inside.
He keeps the arm holding the knife up despite the involuntary tremble that has begun in his arm. A cool sweat travels down his temple. His vision wanes. Despite her⌠figure (she hadnât brandished a weapon a day in her life, he thinks), he knows looks can be deceiving.Â
âYouâre up.â She does not immediately acknowledge the weapon in his hand. Sheâs either brave or simply ignorant. Jace is not sure what heâs more afraid of.
âWhoââ he starts to speak, but he breaks into a coughing fit. His throat feels like it is on fire. She takes a step forward, as if to help or harm him, but he freezes her in place when he turns his gaze back onto her warningly. âWho are you?â
She tells him her name. Then she quickly adds, âyou washed up on the beach in front of my cabin. I found you.â
He bends over to clutch his side. He notices her eyes widen.
âPlease, Iâm not sure you should be up. You sustained massive injuries,â she tells him. âYour body needs rest.â
âI cannotââ he scoffs, then coughs again. âI cannot simply rest. I must leave. I mustâŚâÂ
A pang in his side makes him gasp and hunch over. The knife falls with a clatter against the floor but he canât seem to bring himself to retrieve it. Everything feels like it is in slow motion, out of his reach and control.
She grabs him around the waist before he tips over. He stays conscious long enough for her to lead him back to bed, but he falls within the waves again the second his head hits the pillow.
Consciousness returns to him in fragments. The sound of footsteps by his head. A burning pain spreading up his chest, to which he thinks he shouts, but cannot prevent. The feeling of a wet cloth soaking his tears and sweat.Â
When his eyes finally flutter open, it is dark in the room. A candle burns to a nub on the nightstand next to him, wax coating the wood. Sorrow fills his chest again so quickly it nearly steals his breath.
He sees her slip into the room like a wraith come to haunt him. It is ridiculous, he thinks, that she should be the one to stand over him. On any other day, in any other circumstance, she would not put up much of a fight. Now, he is at her mercy.
âYou tore one of your stitches.â Her voice is soft, but it reverberates in his ear drums and skull like a dragonâs final roar. He clenches his jaw and turns his head toward the moon that hangs like a silver noose in the sky. âI had to sew it back while you were resting.â
Jace doesnât reply. He isnât sure he would know what to say. How does he encompass all his feelingsâor even one of them, into a coherent thought? It isnât possible.
She draws closer and he tenses. She notices. âAre you going to try and hurt me again?âÂ
He considers her for a moment, then shakes his head.
She pauses, thinking about something, then she settles upon his side of the bed. Jace notices for the first time since sheâs entered the room, that she has a bowl of that wretched-looking soup in her hands.
âHere,â she says, outstretching the bowl. He leans back. She pulls away slightly. âSorry.â She cringes like even she realizes that the soup is nothing to write home about. âIt is all I have.â
Jace swallows thickly. He reaches a trembling hand out. She smiles, relieved.
He goes to take the bowl, but his arm feels weak. He pulls back. âPerhapsâŚâ he pauses, clears his throat. âPerhaps you couldâŚâ
Asking for help has never come easy to him. Being weak is not something he is accustomed to. His other hand clenches the sheet in his fist.
She nods. He does not have to be explicit. He untenses his hand as she leans forward, a small bit of soup in the wood spoon.
The first bite makes his face twist. She laughs.
âI truly am sorry,â she says. âI know it is probably not what you are used to.â
It takes every bit of his strength to swallow the offending liquid. It is strangely salty. It tastes like the brine that filled his mouth when heâÂ
He cuts the thought short. No need to ruin his own mood again.
âSomething happened to you out there,â she says as if sheâd read his mind, and although it should be a question, it is not, âsomething bad.â
He swallows another gulp of the soup. He does not reply.Â
She must realize he does not want to speak on that, for she does not press the matter. She lifts the spoon again and he forces down another sip.
âThe soup has fish and some potatoesâoh, and they had carrots at the market today, so I put those in too. Perhaps those are the disgusting parts. I wonât purchase them again.â
Jace does not have the energy, or perhaps the heart, to tell her it is certainly not the vegetables that have made the soup taste like what sea captains scrape off the bottom of their ships.
She scoops another bit of soup and he forces it down. His mouth had begun to retain that saltiness even when he no longer had the soup in his mouth, like a stain one canât wash away with soap and water.
She does not speak for a long pause, but Jace suddenly feels a bit antsy. It feels too intimate an act to not be speaking.
He swallows another mouthful, then clears his throat to speak. âDid you catch the fish?â he asks, his voice hoarse.
âOh, no, no,â she replies to him like it is a preposterous suggestion. Like killing fish is below her standards. âI just buy them.â
He frowns around the spoon in his mouth and hurriedly swallows the liquid. âThen why were you on the shore when you found me?â
She stirs the foul soup around for a moment, thinking hard about something, then she looks up at him. âI collect things. Shells, scrap metal, and fabrics. You would be surprised what comes with the morning tide, and even more what people would pay for them.â
An odd business, Jace canât help but think. It seems like a hard thing to have to rely solely on the Narrow Sea for food and shelter. The Narrow Sea, he remembers with a sudden clarity. That is near where they fought.
âAre you going to tell your name?â Her head is tilted as she asks this, the soup bowl now empty and forgotten upon her folded legs.
He ponders the question for a moment. He could tell her his full name, but it might backfire, especially if she harbors a grudge against his family. He doesnât think she has it in her to cause him harm, but he knows that many do not until they are cornered.
âJace,â he finally tells her. âJust Jace.â
She smiles and her entire face lights up like nothing heâs ever seen before. Something twists in his stomach. âNice to meet you, Jace.â
One, two, three, four. You count the shells noiselessly as you thread them onto the fishing line. They clink together softly as you pull the line taut around your wrist, measuring the width mentally. You remove the bracelet and add a few more of your little shells.
A few days had passed without much event. Jace drifted in and out of consciousness throughout the day and slept soundlessly through the night. He did not complain, but you had seen his thinly-veiled winces and his shuddering breaths. You know that he is suffering more than he lets on.Â
It is an odd thing, you think, to be harboring a man in your home that you know next to nothing about, but had inexplicably formed an attachment to. You still know nothing more about Jace than his name and even that had not been an answer easily wrought.
You slide the shells all to one side and swiftly tie a knot at the end of the line, forming a perfect circular bracelet. Putting it to the side, you cut a new piece of fishing line and begin sorting through your shells again.
Just as you go to slide the first shell on, you hear something behind you. The creaking of wood as light footfalls go across.
You turn your head, body tense.
âJace,â you say, surprised by his appearance. You stand.
He had not been up since heâd ripped that stitch a few days ago, actually heeding your pleas to rest. But a part of you knew even then that the peace would not last long. He is a restless creature, like a bird stuck behind the bars of a cage.
âDo you need something?â You clutch your fingers together across your front, as if doing so could somehow steel your nerves.
He takes a step into the room. You notice his gait seems more steady today. He looks around every bit of the room, his eyes taking in all the pieces that make up your home. You gnaw your lip between your teeth. Did he approve of what he saw?
His voice comes suddenly, a blade cutting through the silence. âWhat are you doing?âÂ
It is not accusatory nor standoffish, instead it seems almost curious. You grab the bracelet you just finished and hold it out to him.
âA bracelet.â
Jace steps closer, tilting his head. âFor what purpose?â
You let out a short laugh. âIt has no purpose. It is just pretty.â
âHm.â He stares at the offending object like heâs never thought about making something just for the sake of making something before. You smile. He averts his eyes to the other side of the room.
âYou said you do not fish,â he says, âand yet you have a fishing rod.â
You follow his eyes to where the thing sits near the door. It sits, forgotten, in the corner of the roomâthere to haunt you and the person youâd never become, youâre sure.
âMy fatherâŚâ you start to say, but something gets caught in your throat. You forcefully swallow past the blockage. âMy father used to fish.â
Jaceâs accusatory eyes soften around the edges. He hobbles closer and takes the seat across from you at the table. Your fatherâs seat.
âAnd your fatherââ
âHe is dead,â you answer curtly, âhe has been for two summers now.â
You pick up the bracelet you had only just starteda nd slide a seashell onto the line. Hurt does not fill your chest like a cavity anymoreânow all you feel is numbness as it spreads from your lungs to your heart.Â
Jace turns his head to look out the window at the night sky. âMy father is gone too.â
Your eyes leap toward his in a flash. He does not look at you, his hand tracing repetitive shapes on the table. The deep circles beneath his eyes have all but faded now, but the weariness to his expression remains. He possesses the gaze of someone who holds more than they can carryâa gaze your father shared.
Your throat bobs as you force yourself to swallow. You feel hollow, but a bit of warmth has reentered your chest. Two children, you think, without a parentâan awful thing, certainly, but not especially rare in Westeros.
You slide another shell onto the bracelet, fingers trembling. âHe went mad.â Telling the truth, those three words, stings like betrayal. âHe was a knight before I was born. He never⌠he never forgot what he had to do. The faces of the men he killed⌠they haunted him.â
Jace goes pale. His dark eyebrows furrow, the line of his mouth pulling down. âI-Iâm sorry. That must have been difficult.â
You nod. Put another two shells on the line. Desperately, you search for a way to change the subject. âHe always wanted to teach me,â you say, gesturing to the rod, âbut he never did.â
He drags a quick hand through his curly brown hair, then pauses as he gets caught in a tangle. He huffs irritably.
âPerhaps,â he says, onyx eyes catching the amber light of the candle flickering on the table, âif I could summon the strength to get dressed and brush my hair, then I could show you how.â
You swallow thickly. âYou do not have toââ
âIt is the least I can do,â he murmurs. âYou saved my life.â
To smile feels inappropriate, so you avert your eyes and begin to tie a knot in another bracelet.
Jace stares at himself in the mirror that stands in the corner of the bedroom with solemn eyes. His eyes glaze over the bandages that wrap around his chest and lower torso, then the unfamiliar slightness to his shoulders and waist. He feels as though he looks at a person he no longer recognizes, like his mind has been transported into the body of someone much weaker than he used to be.
The old house is quiet in the morrow. Every once in a while, a soft breeze will make the house creak. One may occasionally hear a sea bird calling in the distance. Other than that, everything exists as if completely removed from reality; untouched by the war that rages just beyond the seaâs reaches.
His eyes flick back to the mirror and he sees her standing behind him with a deep green doublet wrapped in her arms.Â
âIt was my fatherâs,â she says, drawing closer. âIt might be a little large on you.â
Jace nods. She hands him the doublet. The material feels like cheap linen, nothing to the quality he had worn before. He does not mind. It would be odd, he thinks, for him to expect anything better.
He lifts the top over his head and she helps guide it over. She seems to be trying not to touch his skin, like she thought he might be made of glass. He clenches his jaw when he feels the familiar tightness in one of his wounds as his arms stretch over his head.
The doublet falls over his body easily, but it does hang on him a bit like the robes a septa might wear.
He hears the sound of muffled laughter from behind him and he turns his head.
âMy apologies.â She can barely get it out through her thinly-suppressed amusement. âYou do look a bit funny, though.â
Jace feels his lips tug upwards in the first semblance of happiness heâd felt in days. It feels odd and out of place, and so it disappears with his next blink.
âShall we go?âÂ
Jace nods. He follows her out of the bedroom and into the living area, watching as she bends to grab the fishing pole. He walks behind her as she leads the way outside, too slow to match her pace.
The brush of a briney mist against his skin feels like flying across the humid air on top of Vermax. His chest pangs and he forces the thought away. His eyes brush the swaying grasses that stand cloistered around the seaâs edge, each one caught up in a current of air drifting by. He watches the woman as she strides ahead of him.
She is quite plain. She does not have the dresses of the courts he is used to, nor the manners of a highborn lady. She moves unhindered by corsets and the plumes of expensive dresses. Her soft legs pump quickly across the sands, barefoot, like she has mapped every inch of the shore to near-perfection and knows without looking where she must go.
Seeing her slip ahead, her hair tangled in the seaâs mist, then as she turns over her shoulder with a jovial grin, it feels so different than anything heâs ever known before.
Baela is beautiful. She is poised, and gentle, but with a rough edge that assures him she couldâand wouldâeasily hurt him if pushed to it. But his stomach never flipped when she spoke. He never searched for her eyes from across the room. He never grasped her hand and wished he never had to let it go. He had known her for so long, he assumed she was all heâd ever need, that the feeling of content he felt in her presence was love. Now he isnât so sure.Â
She reaches the shore and stops when her feet hit the tide.
He meets her gaze as she turns to him. His heart pounds in his ears.
âIs it not wonderful?â She sweeps her arm in a half-arc as she speaks, eyes glimmering beneath the high morrowâs sun.
Jace draws his eyes away from her figure to the open waters. It is wonderful, he thinks. If not wrought with pain and regret.
He forces his gaze away. âYes.â
âSo,â she says, shifting on her heels, âhow do we begin?â
Jace steps forward and picks up the rod. He retrieves the little scrap of maroon fabric that she had found a few days back and attaches it to the end of the hook.Â
âIt is always a good idea to have some kind of bait,â he explains, âfish are attracted to movement. If you can find insects or worms, those work even better. But this fabric may do. We will have to see.â
He moves close to the edge of the water and lets the rod scrape the top of the ocean. âMost fish do not swim right by the shore, so you will need to throw the line out a little ways. Make sure that you do not catch your skin with the hook.â
She nods, eyebrows drawn together in deep contemplation. Jace nearly smiles at the way sheâs taking this all so seriously, before he catches himself and schools his expression.
Jace steadies his hand and propels the line out into the ocean. One of the wounds on his side complains at the movement, but he ignores it. He watches the line bob in the water with a softened expression. His memory flits between days spent under the sun at Driftmark and Dragonstone, laughing while he chases Lucerys with a wood sword; Laenor showing him how to fish among the tidepools; a fierce burn from the sun that is soothed by his motherâs affectionate hand.
âWho taught you this?â Her voice breaks through the silence that had settled between them. Her eyes keep steady on the line, lashes squinting against the harsh light.
âMy father,â he replies after a momentâs hesitation.Â
Another pause.Â
He feels her shift to look over at the side of his face. âIâm sure he would be quite proud of the man you have become.â
Jaceâs breath halts in his throat. Hands suddenly feel clammy. His heart hiccups and thuds against his skin. He had not thought of Laenor in a long time, Harwin even longer. It feels like decades had passed since he had seen either of them, a forgotten moment in his life overshadowed by tragedy after tragedy.
âOh, look,â she says suddenly from beside him. âA conch shell.âÂ
She wields the massive thing toward him. Her entire face is bright with delight as she shows him the object that any normal person would completely disregard. She is anything but normal, though.
âThese always sell for a few silvers at the markets,â she informs him, âthe rich folk think they are good luck.â
He is not able to reply before his arm suddenly jolts and he is pulled a few inches forward. On the end of the line, something stirs in the water.Â
âCome,â he orders her urgently. âSomething is biting.â
She draws close, her eyes wide. The conch shell drops to the sand. âWhat is it?â
âI donât know,â he says, âhere, you hold the rod.â
âWhat? I donât know how to catch a fish!â
He thrusts the rod into her hands. âI am too weak to reel it in. You have to.â It is a lie, but she does not seem to recognize it.
Her hands slip all over the rod as she tries to fight the beast at the end of the line. Jace, pitying her struggle, slides behind her and steadies her hands by placing his on top of hers. She freezes for a moment, then begins to pull. Jace clutches her hands gently within his own and he notices that they tremble like seagrass beneath his own.Â
âHold it steady,â he says against the shell of her ear, âpull only when you feel it stop fighting. You do not wantââ
Suddenly, the pressure is removed from the end of the line and they are both sent stumbling backwards onto the sand. Jace lands on his bum, but she is able to catch herself as she tumbles beside him. The line must have broken. The fish is long gone now.
âOh Jace, are you okay?â He looks over at her as she crouches beside him. âYou did not reopen your wounds, did you?â
The laugh that tumbles out of his lips makes her jolt back. Distantly, he is not sure why he is laughing. The fish got away, he landed on back on the sand, and now one of his cuts hurts. But he had just felt so alive. So unburdened by responsibility, like any man of ten and eight without the entirety of their motherâs empire resting upon their shoulders ought to feel.Â
The laughter eventually abates, and all that is left is the open sky atop him and the sun beating down on his skin.
âDo you think that the fish I cooked last night was spoiled?â she asks in response to his exuberant mood. âOnce, my father caught ill from bad potatoesâŚâ
Jace feels another chuckle escape his lips. âSorry,â he tells her. âI have⌠not felt that free in a long time.â
She lets out a soft âohâ and moves to lay next to him in the sand. Far enough away that there is no chance that they will touch, but close enough that Jace can smell the lavender on her skin.
Jace stares at the clear sky ahead of him until he begins to feel his body ache with exhaustion. He pulls himself into a seated position, but she does not move immediately. She looks at him with soft eyes from where she lays against the sand, a small, affectionate smile upon her lips. Her chest rises and falls slowly, hand absentmindedly drawing pictures in the sand.
His stomach churns as he turns away. He stares out at the rippling current with half-lidded eyes.Â
âHow far is the nearest town?â His words are nearly carried away with the next tide that pulls up the shore. She hears him all the same, sliding to sit up next to him.
âNot far,â she replies, a toothy grin on her breath, âwould you like to come and help me pick out a fish for dinner tomorrow?â
Jace does not reply. The hope tinged in her words makes something inside him feel rotten. Like he is corrupting the world wherein she lives. As he takes longer and longer to reply, he notices something settle upon her face. A realization that fades into melancholy.
âOh.â She looks to the sea in an attempt to hide the dewiness in her eyes, but Jace notices all the same. âYou wish to leave.â
âMy mother,â he says, âshe will be looking for me. She will not stop until she finds me.â
She nods.
Something compels him to continue. âI would stay. I would, truly,â he says, âbut this is bigger than me. Bigger than thisââ
âI understand, Jace.â But Jace is not sure she does. Her lips purse, her eyebrows drawn to form a small wrinkle between them.Â
âI would at least stay a couple more days,â he tells her, âI need to make sure I do not simply hurt myself again by leaving too soon.â
She pulls her knees to her chest and rests her head upon them. âIt sounds like a good plan,â she agrees quietly. âPerhaps⌠Perhaps I could pack you some food as well.â
âYes,â he says this far too enthusiastically, but he notices her brighten at the joy in his voice and so he continues to smile. âThat would be wonderful.â
She nods, pulling at a frayed edge of her dress. âThen it will be done.â
The two of them watch for a few more moments as the red sun burns a hole against the sky and as the water ripples with wrath.
âI will leave on the morrowâ--That is what he had told you over dinner the previous evening.Â
In the morrow, the sky opens and floods them with her tears.Â
You stand by the window of the cabin looking out at the frightful weather. Rain falls like daggers against the darkened, tumultuous sea. Waves crash against the shore. A crack of lightning makes you flinch.
âThe Gods are angry,â you say to the still air of the cabin.Â
Jace sits halfway over his plate of roasted fish as you say this. Then he straightens, his eyes flickering briefly outside. The dark brown of his irises reflect the grey of the clouds swirling above. âOr they do not grant me leave.â
You force yourself to pull away from the window. Turning your head, another flash of brilliant light comes across the floor, painting everything white. You fall into a silence as you step carefully across the cabin.
You knew that from the moment you found him, that it would not be permanent. Just like the rains that fall from above now, this momentary storm in your life will too pass. You had not even wished for him to stay, initially. You recall that first night, sewing his wounds with fishing line, as your eyes stretched across his alien visage. You had told yourself that his presence would be temporary as a comfort then, now you tell it to ground yourself in reality.
Jace had become more friendly in the past few days. Conversation came easily to him and made the thought of him leaving that much harder. Now you were the one that deflated at the sound of his voice across the hall, the one that shrunk from revealing the parts of yourself that had not seen the light in years.
You are selfish. It is a quality that had always lurked behind your eyes, but had sharpened since your fatherâs death. It is a survival tactic. Every animal, even humans, wish to hold onto the things they hold dear. It does not matter if it is not much. Everything you have is in some way worth keepingâincluding Jace.
But you could not fight logic. His mother, his familyâthey had a higher claim to him than you did. You could not keep him like a bird with clipped wings. It is cruel to even think it.Â
You scrub the dish in your hands until your hands feel raw and achy. The only light comes from behind you in the smoldering fireplace and the flash of light that illuminates the sky. You hear the clatter of the bowl from behind you as Jace finds his footingâthe screech of the chair as it rubs harshly against the floor.
You feel his warmth as he comes to stand beside you. He reaches a hand into the soapy mess over the wood bucket and fetches your hand from the fray.Â
âYou have made yourself bleed,â he observes quietly, a finger stroking over the cuts.Â
You feel your throat bob under the weight of his probing stare. You slip your hand away from his and turn your back to dip the bowl in the bucket of soapless water.
âHave I done something to upset you?â he murmurs. His words are echoed by a rumble of thunder in the distance.
You still your movements for just a second before continuing. Your cuts throb at the feeling of the cool water cleansing the blood from your hands. âNo,â you reply simply.
âThen why have you been so quiet as of late?â
You drop the bowl onto the wood surface in front of you and turn, drying your hands with a near cloth. âI just havenât had much to say, I suppose.â
Another flash of light. Rain as it beats ceaselessly against the metal roof. You face him, clenching the towel in your fist.
âShall we remove your stitches?â It had been suggested a few days ago as the first thing he would do before departing, so he would not have to bother with finding someone to do it for him on the road.Â
Jace looks like he might say something. Then he shakes his head. âOn the bed?â
You nod. âThat would be easiest.âÂ
You slip behind him as he moves toward the bedroom. On your way, you light the spill near the fireplace and bring it with you. Your eyes find his figure as it slinks through the darkness. Heâs healed so much better than you had ever expected he might. He should not have survived his injuriesâshould not have been able to heal so quickly. You think the Gods must favor his survival much more than they favored the own laws they stipulated.
He slides off his doublet and lounges back into the bed. You let the flame on the end of the spill touch the end of the wick of the candlestick and the room is bathed in a soft glow. You suffocate the flame and put the spill onto the table next to the bed.
Jace watches you as you do this quietly. When your eyes move up to his face, you notice his eyes are lidded, the tips of his ears red. You feel a warmth catch hold of your skin at his gaze and you avert your eyes to his chest.
You begin your work in silence. You lift the knot of each stitch and easily slice through it with the sharp edge of your knife. At the end of your first removal, you are happy to see that the wound has faded to a pinkish stripe.
âWho taught you this?âÂ
You startle at the sound of his voice after several long minutes of silence. It is a deep baritone, rough around the edges. Its unexpected richness has you shifting in your place on the edge of the bed. A flash of white light from out the window bathes his face in color.Â
âMy father.â You do not elaborate further. You think it self explanatory. Your father taught you everything.
âWas he hurt often?âÂ
You cut another knot. âThere are no maesters in the far reaches,â you tell him. A hint of bitter frustration lines your words. âI have assisted several people who have needed help in the village.â
âI did not know,â he replies softly, âthat is quite kind of you.â
âWe all share responsibility here, no one is without duty.â You put another piece of the fishing line to the side. âIt is how things function when you do not have the entire Seven Kingdoms at your disposal.â
You notice Jaceâs eyebrows furrow. His stomach tenses beneath your hand. âHow did youâŚâ
âIt is obvious,â you say, âyour voice, your cadence, the way you were dressed when I found you⌠you have no scars, no callouses. You did not offer your houseâs name, so I can only assumeââ
âJacaerys Velaryon,â he says, âthat is my name.â
You still. Your eyes dart to his, alarm filling your chest and stealing your breath. âVelaryon,â you echo, heart racing. âThat is the name ofâŚâ
âPerhaps you know of Corlys Velaryon,â he offers, âthe Sea Snake. He is my grandfather. Or Rhaenyra Targaryen, my motherââ
You stand, breathing panicked. âYou must leave,â you say, âwhy did you stay so long? The realm⌠your mother⌠the Seven Kingdoms need you.â
Jace leans forward to grasp your arm. You allow him only because you fear you may topple over without the stability.
âI am of no use to them in this condition,â he scoffs. You notice a faraway look in his eyes. The same look he sometimes got when he stared upon the ocean or recalled stories of his father to you. âMy dragon is dead, my body a wreck. There is nothing left of me for them to scavenge.â
âT-That is not true,â you stutter. âYou must at least find out if they are safe. You have been healed for days⌠you could have leftââ
âI stayed for you.â You fall silent at the sincerity in his voice. His hand drifts down the bare skin of your wrist to thread between your fingers. He cups your hand between his own.
âYou cannot stay,â you tell him.
âIt does not matter if I stay one more day. The realm will not fall today,â he replies, âwe cannot travel in this ruinous weather, anyway.â
Your eyes drift to the window, where the wind throws its tears against the pane. You nod slowly and find your seat again.
You grasp the knife from where you sat it on the duvet. You slide the other to rest upon his warm stomach. His breaths quicken beneath your hand as you drag it up to the next wound.
âI almost killed you the day after I found you,â you whisper, âI thought it would be a mercy. The fact that you are here at all⌠alive, breathing. It is a gift from the Gods.â
He leans forward. âWhat stopped you?â
Your movements pause from where you had started to cut away another knot. âYou did.â
His throat bobs. His hand moves from where it clutches the sheets to where your hand rests upon his sternum. He strokes the skin of your hand gently.
You lean forward without realizing what you are doing. He does not allow you to back away. He brings his other hand to the nape of your neck and leans forward to seal your lips with his.
The kiss is languid. His tongue probes the seal of your lips and you allow it to slip inside. You bring your hand up to cup his jaw and he drags the hand cupping your neck to your hair. You let out a soft moan against his lips and he responds to the noise by pulling you forward onto his chest.
You do not lean your weight onto him in fear of hurting him, but you feel his hands crawl to settle upon your heaving ribs. You gently settle your lower half onto his hips, settling your hand down on a part of his chest that had no injuries.
You and Jace continue to kiss for what feels like hours. It is exhilarating. It feels like flying. Your stomach feels warm and fluttery, and your lips are throbbing.
You shift your hips and Jace lets out a groan. You pull away from the kiss, concerned. His hand moves to grab the flesh of your hip, sliding you back some. There is a hardness beneath you that makes a pleasant chill slide down your spine.
âAre you alright, Jace?âÂ
âUnless you wish for us to have sex,â he grumbles, âyou should move off my hips.â
You swallow thickly at the insinuation. Sex. A novel thing. A thing that should be saved for marriage. But marriage seems so far from your mind now, drifting away like a current.
âAnd what do you wish for us to do?â you murmur. You slide forward an inch and he throws his head back onto the pillows. His chest heaves.
âYou know what I wish,â he groans. âIs it not obvious?â
You lean forward so that your lips barely brush his own. âThen take it.â
Sunlight streams through the window ahead of you, branding the side of your face with heat, and your eyelids flutter against the intrusion. You fist your fingers in the sheets and twist your legs close to your body. As you shift, you feel an arm pulling you backwards.
You grasp the hand splayed across your stomach between your trembling fingers.
âStay,â he murmurs against the shell of your ear. Tears bead in your eyes, but you keep them at bay.
Your thumb finds the pulse that thrums beneath his skin and you count his heart beats. The Gods are cruel, you think. They had kept Jace here long enough for you to miss him when he leaves.
You turn your body over to face him. You are not surprised to see him already staring back at you. His dark curls are a mess on the pillow beneath him. His lips pull upwards at the corners, but do not reach his eyes. He brings his hand up to stroke your cheek.
Your chin wobbles and he blinks away a frown.
âIt will not be forever,â he tells you softly, reverently,
âI will return to you one day.â
You bring a hand up to wipe away the stubborn tears. âI suppose you do not know when that will be.â
He leans forward to give you a kiss and you know that is the only way he can possibly tell you no.Â
Pulling away from the kiss feels like saying good-bye.
You stay in bed as he stands, sluggishly dressing himself as if he was still looking for reasons not to leave. You do not think he finds one. He turns his head to look back at you and his expression falters.Â
A small smile curls at your lips as you mouth the wordâgo.
He heeds your instruction and leaves your cabin with a satchel of roasted fish, a map to the nearest town, and a bracelet strung with seashells.
ONE YEAR LATERâŚ
The nets are full this morrow. The tide ebbs and flows, slinking across the silver sands. Birds let out cries of rejoice overhead for the plentiful bounty gifted by the sea.Â
You bend the knee to heave the first net out of the water. You clutch your chest protectively as you search through the things with the other hand.Â
âHm,â you murmur, âa rainbow shell.âÂ
You bring the shell up to the light and small reflections bounce across your vision. Tucking it into your satchel, you search some more. A piece of metal, two scraps of fabric, and a clam.
You pocket the metal and one of the ratty pieces of fabric, but allow the clam to slide back under the tide. You bring your dry hand to rest upon the head of the babe swaddled against your breast.
âShh,â you whisper to him as he begins to stir. âIt is alright, my prince.â
He brings his head up slowly to peer at you. A splatter of sea foam settles on the side of his face, but he does not seem to mind. He gives you a gummy smile and you return it lovingly.
He watches with bleary eyes as you sort through the next net of things. You show him each individual item as you retrieve it. Your heart skips when you feel a familiar shape and weight in the palm of your hand.
âA conch shell,â you inform him with a giddy grin, âthese sell for several silvers at the market.â
He stares at the shell with wide eyes. The pattern, a dark brown and white mottling, you think, must confuse or enrapture him by the way he looks at it.
The small of your back has begun to hurt. You straighten up and lift a supportive hand to rest underneath the babyâs bum.
âThis will be enough for today,â you decide. âThe sea has gifted us more than we need.â
The little boy smacks his lips as if agreeing with the statement. You nod and carry your satchel and the boy up the familiar path to the cabin.
However, your footsteps slow as you grow closer until you stop right before the door. Something is not right. You protectively cradle the back of your sonâs head as you touch a hand to the door.
It pushes open with little resistance. You slide the knife you kept on you at all times to your hand in one swift movement as you step inside.
You take not but two steps beyond the threshold before you freeze. The knife clatters to the ground and a gasp shudders from your lips at the sight in front of you.
He stands across from you like he never left. Heâs dressed in black gilded leathers, his body a tad leaner and steadier. His face looks older, more mature and shaped by circumstance, just as you imagine yours must too. His mop of dark hair curls around his ears, longer than when you saw him last.
His lips with awe. He stares at you and your face as if trying to map something with his mind.Â
âJace,â you say breathlessly. âHowâŚâ
âI saw you by the shore as I rode in from town,â he murmurs, taking a hesitant step forward. He lets out a soft laugh that sends your stomach aflutter. âI thought I might surprise you. I guess I am lucky to not have received a knife in my throat.â
Your throat bobs. Mistiness clouds your vision. âYou came back for us.â
âFor us?â Jace echoes, eyebrows furrowed. He comes so close he can reach out to you with his arm and you know that he has seen him then, by the shock that melts his features.
The boy turns his head to the best of his ability in your swaddle, his eyes searching for the unfamiliar voice. Jaceâs mouth comes nearly unhinged, a trembling hand lifting as if to stroke his head, but it falls short.
He forces his eyes to look at you. âHe⌠heâs mine?â
You bite your lip to suppress your smile as you nod. You reach around your neck with one arm while the other supports the babyâs bum. You unravel the swaddle easily, and the chubby baby flails his arms with relief. Never one to like a cage.
You outstretch him toward Jace and he takes him eagerly. He holds him with practiced ease. He supports the babyâs head and bum as he gazes down at him, tracing his forehead to the slope of his nose to the flutter of his lashes with only his eyes.
Jace finally breaks away from the baby long enough to look up at you. âAnd I just⌠I just left you. You and my son.â
Your heart skips a beat at the name. Son. You bite the inside of your cheek to keep from grinning like a fool.
âYou had to,â you say, stepping forward to lay a gentle hand upon his upper arm. âYour family needed you.â
He clenches his jaw. âNothing we did⌠nothing we accomplished⌠equals this.â
He strokes a featherlight touch against the boyâs cheek and he wrinkles his nose.
âWill youâŚâ you pause. You try to steel yourself for the rejection that may very well follow, hands clammy by your sides. âWill you be staying long?â
Jaceâs eyes rush to meet yours. He steps forward. The baby whimpers in his arms at the movement.Â
âI would stay forever if you would have me.â
You feel your heart skip a beat. âWhat? What of the throne? Of your family?â
He shakes his head. Your stomach drops.
âMy brother Aegon will be the next ruler. Wed to his cousin.â
âAnd you?â
His dark eyes soften as they consider this question carefully. He clutches the lost prince to his chest protectively.
âI am right where I want to be.â
Š mariposium ; do not copy, feed into ai, redistribute, reupload, edit, translate, or otherwise steal my works, thanks!
PRINCESS READER AND CREGAN INFIDELITY PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Like what would Ormund think or how would he react when his innocent little wife is getting dicked down 24/7 and sheâs a willing participant. Let alone she got fucked by a northener lol
The Letter
Ormund Hightower X Targ!Reader
The war had been grinding on for eight months, but Ormund Hightower had not slept in four.
Not since the night she disappeared. She had taken Aethanâhis son, his bloodâand vanished into the darkness like a ghost, like a traitor, like the ungrateful little whore he had always known she could become if he did not keep her close enough.
He had torn the reach apart searching for her. He had sent riders in every direction, had questioned every guard and servant and spy who might have seen something. Nothing. She had simply⌠gone. As if she had never existed at all. As if the months of marriage, the nights in his bed, the child she had borne him meant nothing. As if he had not shaped her, taught her, owned her.
He had not been the same since. His men whispered about it behind his back. Lord Hightower had grown erratic. Lord Hightower had stopped eating. Lord Hightower's eyes had taken on a wild, feverish light that made even his most seasoned commanders uneasy. He still led them into battleâhe was too good a soldier to abandon the war entirelyâbut his mind was somewhere else. Always somewhere else. Always chasing the ghost of a silver-haired girl who had slipped through his fingers like smoke, taking his son with her.
And now this. The letter had arrived an hour ago, delivered by a rider who had nearly killed his horse getting there. The man had stumbled into camp, half-frozen and wild-eyed, clutching a scroll sealed with the mark of Ormund's own spy networkâthe network he had deployed across half of Westeros with one purpose and one purpose only: find her.
The tent was crowded with commanders when the rider was ushered in. Ser Brynden stood at Ormund's right hand, as he always did, Ser Gwayne, and half a dozen other knights and lords who had pledged their swords to the Green cause. They had been in the middle of a strategy session, poring over maps and troop movements, planning the next offensive.
Ormund took the scroll without a word. He broke the seal. He read.
His face went pale first. Bone-white, as if all the blood had been drained from his body in a single instant. Then the color rushed back, flooding his cheeks with a dark, dangerous red that spread down his neck and disappeared beneath the collar of his tunic. His hands began to tremble, just slightly at first, then violently, the parchment shaking in his grip like a leaf in a storm.
"My lord?" Brynden stepped forward, concern etched into his weathered features. "What news?"
Ormund did not answer. His eyes were fixed on the letter, reading and re-reading the words as if repetition might change them. His lips moved silently, forming syllables that no one else could hear. The trembling in his hands spread to his arms, his shoulders, his entire body.
And then he began to scream.
"CREGAN STARK!"
The sound was not human. It was the roar of a wounded animal, a beast caught in a trap, a man whose last thread of sanity had just snapped like a bowstring pulled too tight. The commanders scrambled backward, knocking over chairs and sending maps flying, but Ormund did not seem to see them. He was already moving, already reaching for the sword that rested against the campaign chest in the corner.
"CREGAN FUCKING STARK! I WILL KILL HIM! I WILL TEAR HIS HEART OUT WITH MY BARE HANDS!"
The first blow took the map table in half. Wood splintered and cracked, and the maps that had been spread across it fluttered to the ground like dying birds. Ormund ripped his sword free and swung again, and this time the blade carved a great, jagged slash through the canvas wall of the tent, letting in a shaft of cold grey daylight.
"MY LORD, PLEASEâ" Ser Gwayne started forward, but a wild swing of the sword sent him reeling backward, his hands raised in surrender.
"SHE IS MINE!" Ormund brought the sword down on a chair, and the chair exploded. "SHE HAS ALWAYS BEEN MINE! AND HEâTHAT NORTHERN SAVAGEâHE HAS TOUCHED HER! HE HAS PUT HIS HANDS ON WHAT BELONGS TO ME!"
She was there. She had been there for weeks. Living openly in Cregan Stark's tent, sleeping in his bed, wearing his colors, warming his furs like some Northern whore. Everyone in the camp knew. Everyone could hear themâthe sounds she made, the way she cried out his name, the way she begged for more. His wife. His Aethan's mother. Screaming for another man like a common camp follower. A public affair, the letter said. A very public affair. As if she wanted everyone to know. As if she wanted him to know.
And the child. His son. Living under Stark's protection, being held by Stark's hands, perhaps already learning to call another man father. The thought made something behind his eyes go red and hot and blinding.
"DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING RIGHT NOW?" He rounded on his commanders, and they shrank back from the madness in his eyes. "RIGHT NOW, WHILE WE STAND HERE DISCUSSING STRATEGY AND SUPPLY LINES? HE IS TOUCHING HER! HE IS INSIDE HER! HE IS MAKING HER MOANâTHOSE MOANS BELONG TO ME!"
He threw the letter aside and grabbed another chair, hurling it against the central support pole with enough force to shatter it into kindling.
"I taught her everything," he snarled, his voice cracking. "Everything she knows about pleasure, everything she knows about her own bodyâI taught her that. I was the first. I was the only. And now sheâshe is using what I taught her with HIMâ"
He could see it. That was the worst part. He could see it so clearly in his mind, as if he were standing in the corner of Stark's tent watching. Her silver hair spread across Stark's furs. Her body arching beneath another man's hands. Her lips parting on another man's name. The sounds she made, the expressions that crossed her face, the way she clung and gasped and pleadedâall of it, all of it, was his. He had discovered it. He had cultivated it. He had spent months learning every secret her body held, every spot that made her gasp, every rhythm that made her shatter.
And now Stark was reaping the harvest. Stark was enjoying the fruits of Ormund's labor. Stark was touching what Ormund had claimed, had trained, had owned.
The thought made him want to kill someone. Everyone.
"GET ME A MAP!" he bellowed, driving his sword into the floorboards. "A MAP OF THE NORTH! I WANT TO SEE THE FASTEST ROUTE TO WINTERFELL!"
Ser Brynden stepped forward, his old bones creaking, his weathered face set in lines of grim determination. "My lord, you cannotâ"
"I CAN AND I WILL!" Ormund rounded on him, and for a terrible moment, the sword came up. But Brynden did not flinch. He stood his ground, steady as an oak, and met his lord's wild gaze without blinking.
"Strike me if you must," Brynden said quietly. "I have served your house for forty years. I served your father, and his father before him. And I will not stand by and watch you destroy yourself."
"Destroy myself? DESTROY MYSELF?" Ormund laughed, and the sound was utterly unhinged. "I am already destroyed! Do you not see that? She destroyed me the moment she spread her legs for another man!"
"Then let her destruction mean something." Brynden's voice was steady, measured, the voice of a man talking a jumper down from a ledge. "Win the war, my lord. Win the war, and you can have everything. Everything."
Ormund's grip on the sword tightened. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that if you ride north now, you die. You take men into the snow, into Stark territory, and you die. Cregan Stark will put your head on a spike, and your wife will watch, and she will not shed a single tear. Is that what you want? To give him the satisfaction? To give her the satisfaction?"
The words hit Ormund like a physical blow. He staggered, his free hand coming up to press against his temple.
"No," he said, his voice raw. "No. She is mine. She belongs to me."
"Then win the war first." Brynden stepped closer, close enough to lay a hand on Ormund's arm. The touch was gentle, almost paternal. "Win the war, and you win everything. The Iron Throne will owe you a debt that can never be repaid. You can demand Stark's head. You can demand your wife's return. You can have her back in your bed, back where she belongs, and you can make Stark watch while you remind her exactly who she answers to. But only if you win."
The tent was silent. The other commanders held their breath. Somewhere outside, a horse whinnied, and the wind snapped against the torn canvas walls.
Ormund stood perfectly still, his chest heaving, his eyes wild, his sword still clutched in his white-knuckled grip. The letter lay crumpled on the floor at his feet, the words still burning in his mindâwords about her, about him, about the sounds she made and the way she cried his name. Stark's name. Not his. Never his, not anymore.
"Stark's head," he said finally, his voice barely above a whisper. "On a spike. Outside my gates."
"Yes," Brynden agreed. "Stark's head on a spike."
"And my wife. Back in my bed. Back where she belongs. In chains if necessary."
Brynden hesitated. "Yes."
"And my son. Back in my house."
"Yes."
Ormund closed his eyes. When he opened them again, the wild, feverish light had not disappeared, but it had banked. Transforming from an inferno into something colder, something infinitely more dangerous.
"Then we win this war," he said. He pulled his sword from the floorboards and slid it back into its sheath with a soft, deadly hiss. "We win this war, and we take King's Landing, and we put Daeron on the throne. And when it is doneâwhen the dragons are dead and the pretender queen is ash and there is no one left to stand against usâI will march north with a full army at my back. And I will tear Winterfell apart stone by stone until I find her."
He turned to face his commanders, and the smile that spread across his face made every man in the tent take an involuntary step backward.
"And when I do," he said, "I am going to make her watch while I kill him. I am going to make her watch every single moment of it. I am going to make her see what happens to men who touch what belongs to me. And thenâ" He paused, letting the silence stretch, letting them all imagine it. "Then she is coming home. And she is never leaving again.
Cregan Stark was a dead man. He just did not know it yet. Every battle Ormund fought, every victory he won, every strategic decision he made, all of it was in service of that single, burning goal. Win the war. Claim the throne. Take back what was his.
The war would end, and Cregan Stark would die, and Ormund Hightower would have his family backâby any means necessary. By fire and blood, if that was what it took.
He had been patient once before, he could be patient again. He could wait. He could plan. He could let the rage simmer and build and concentrate into something lethal.
--
Every night, the same ritual. Ormund Hightower would sit alone in his tent, a flagon of wine at his elbow, the crumpled spy's letter spread before him on the table, and he would lose his mind all over again.
He tried not to. He tried to focus on strategy, on supply lines, on the thousand logistical details that came with commanding an army. But the moment the silence descended, the moment he was alone with his thoughts, the images would come creeping back. Vivid. Detailed. Unbearable.
Her. With him. Cregan Stark was younger than Ormund. That was the first thing that ate at him, gnawing at his pride like a rat at a corpse. Stark was her ageâonly a few years older than her, if that. A young man in his prime, not a grizzled lord of forty with grey threading his temples and lines deepening around his eyes. Stark was tall and broad-shouldered and hard-muscled from a lifetime of swinging a greatsword in the Northern wilderness. Stark had a full head of dark hair and a strong jaw and the kind of rugged, wolfish handsomeness that maidens swooned over in the songs.
Ormund had seen him once, years ago, at some tourney or council. He remembered thinking the boy was arrogant. Northern savages, all of them. But nowânow he could not stop picturing that arrogance in his bed. In his wife.
He would pour another cup of wine and drink it down in one burning swallow, but the images only grew sharper.
Stark's hands on her hips. Stark's mouth on her throat. Stark's bodyâyounger, harder, strongerâpressing her into the furs. The furs. Northern furs, rough and barbaric, not the fine silk sheets of the Hightower. And she was moaning for him. Making those soundsâthose sounds that Ormund had discovered, had cultivated, had taught her to makeâfor another man.
A younger man.
A man her own age.
"FUCK!"
The goblet flew across the tent and clanged against the central pole, spraying wine across the canvas. Ormund was on his feet, pacing, his hands tearing through his hair.
He was not just any man. That was the second thing. That was what made it so much worse. Cregan Stark was the Lord of Winterfell. The Warden of the North. A Great Lord in his own right, who ruled a territory larger than all the other Kingdoms combined. His titles were ancient and unimpeachable. His bloodline stretched back eight thousand years to the First Men, to the Kings of Winter. The Starks had been royalty when the Hightowers were still lighting signal fires and calling it civilization.
Ormund was a powerful man. He knew that. He was the Lord of Oldtown, the Beacon of the South, the head of one of the oldest and wealthiest houses in the Reach. But he was not a Great House. He was not a Warden. He was a vassal to the Tyrells, technically, however much he might disdain them. He did not have a crown in his history. He did not have the blood of kings.
But Stark did.
She was a princess of the blood. A Targaryen. A dragonrider. And now she was spreading her legs for a man who could call himself her equalâor near enough. A man whose titles could almost match her own. A man who could give her a castle that had stood for thousands of years, a kingdom that bowed to no one, a name that commanded respect across the entire continent.
What could Ormund give her that Stark could not match or exceed?
The thought made him want to kill someone. "HE IS NO BETTER THAN ME!" he roared at the empty tent. "HE IS A SAVAGE IN FURS! HE KNOWS NOTHING OF HER! HE DOES NOT KNOW HER THE WAY I DO!"
But the cruel voice in the back of his mind whispered: He knows her now. He's learning her. Every night, he's learning her.
He hurled the wine flagon against the tent pole, and it shattered, spraying dark red liquid across the maps and the bedroll and the crumpled letter. He picked up a chair and smashed it against the ground. He drove his fist into the tent pole, once, twice, three times, until his knuckles were bloody and the pain cut through the red haze for a few blessed seconds.
"She was MINE!" he screamed at no one. "She was MINE before she was his! She will be MINE after he is dead!"
But the voice whispered: She chose him. She ran from you and chose him.
He staggered to his cot and collapsed onto it, his bloody hand pressed to his face, his breath coming in ragged, uneven gasps. The images would not stop. They never stopped. Every night, the same torture.
Her on her back, her hair fanned out across Stark's furs, her eyes hazy with pleasure. Her legs wrapped around his waistâhis young, hard waist, not the softening middle of a man twenty years her senior. Her nails raking down his back. Her lips forming his name. Stark. Cregan. Not Ormund. Never Ormund.
Did she think of him at all? When Stark was inside her, when she was crying out for him, when she was shattering around himâdid she remember the man who had taught her what pleasure was? Did she remember her husband?
Or had she forgotten him entirely?
"Ungrateful little WHORE," he snarled, but the word felt hollow. Because she was not a whore, was she? A whore took coin. A whore spread her legs for anyone. She had spread her legs for one manâone other manâand that made it so much worse. That made it a choice. She had chosen Stark. She wanted Stark. She was with Stark not out of duty or desperation but because she preferred him.
Because he was younger. Because he was her age. Because he was a Great Lord, a Warden, a man whose power matched her own.
Because he was not Ormund.
"I GAVE HER EVERYTHING!" The cry was torn from somewhere deep in his chest. "I gave her a home, a name, a son! I protected her! I loved her! And sheâshe threw it all away forâfor a Northern savage whoâ"
Who could give her a kingdom. Who could give her a castle that made the Hightower look like a merchant's counting house. Who could give her the blood of the First Men, the loyalty of the North, a place at the side of a man who answered to no one but himself.
Ormund had spent his entire life climbing. Clawing his way up the ladder of power, building alliances, accumulating influence. He had married a Targaryen princessâa feat that should have been the crowning achievement of his house. And now she was in another man's bed, and that man outranked him, and there was nothingânothingâhe could do about it except win this damned war and take her back by force.
"I will kill him," he whispered into the darkness. "I will kill him slowly. I will make it last for days. I will make her watch every moment of it. And when he is deadâwhen she has seen what happens to men who touch what is MINEâshe will beg for my forgiveness. She will crawl back to me on her knees. And I will decide whether to give it to her."
He lay back on the cot, staring at the canvas ceiling, his bloody hand cradled against his chest. Outside, the camp was quiet. The sentries walked their posts. The horses stamped in the picket lines. The army slept.
But Ormund Hightower did not sleep. He never slept anymore. He just lay there in the darkness, listening to the sound of his own ragged breathing, and pictured his wife in another man's arms.
Younger. Stronger. Higher-born.
It did not matter. None of it mattered. Because when this war was over, Cregan Stark would be dead, and YN would be back in his bed where she belonged, and he would spend the rest of his life reminding her exactly who owned her.
That was the thought he clung to. That was the thought that got him through the night.
That, and the image of Stark's head on a spike outside the gates of Oldtown, his sightless eyes staring at nothing, his blood dripping down the stone walls.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Warnings: Afab!reader, fem!reader, not gender neutral, BIG age difference, segment shenanigans;
With 25 - noncon, bondage, medical exam, pelvic exam, speculum usage, vaginal fingering, squirting, anal thermometer, anal fingering, overstim, forced orgasm (2), general science/medical fuckery, there is blood and a brief bit of gore (not our own, I'm not into that), dehumanization/objectification/degradation, humiliation
With Zandik - nonconsensual spanking, spanking punishment, over the knee (my fave), spanking while someone else watches (Dottore), anal fingering, slight infantilization, humiliation, degrading dialogue, slut shaming (don't take this too seriously)
Webttore - masturbation with an object (slipper), him being a little freak, yes, that needs to be its own warning
Part 1 & 2 Part 3
A/N: Please make sure to pay extra attention to the tags from here on out, guys! We're kicking it up another notch, I fear. I want everyone to be safe and in a good headspace when they read my fics, so that's why I decided to give the individualized breakdown for warnings like this. Please feel free to skip if its too much!đđĽš
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Dear mama,Â
I still have not heard anything back from you yet, and my worry for you continues to grow with each passing day that I am not handed a letter addressed with your handwriting. Please, at least let me know that you are safe and sound, even if you presently donât have much else to say. I understand that you are probably quite preoccupied with your treatment but I just miss you so very, very much.Â
The last time he was here, well over a week ago now, I asked Lord Regrator to check in with you on my behalf and he gave me his word that he would do so as soon as he was able. He has not been back since then to relay any sort of message to me though, if you perhaps thought to entrust him with some sort of communication to deliver. Of course that is even assuming heâs been able to fulfill my request of him yet. Her Majesty, the Tsarista, appears to keep him quite busy indeed. Iâm sure he would come by to see Master Zandik much more often if he could, especially now that I know the full extent of their relationship.Â
But I pray that all is going well with you and, as strange as it probably sounds, I hope that you are doing the same for me. Some days I think I need that more than anything else. Perhaps Iâm making it sound a bit dramatic, though? In truth, it is not nearly something as harrowing as all that.Â
In my previous, hastily written letter, if youâll recall, I shared my silly fears with you over the seemingly supernatural happenings in this place and I have since come to realize exactly how silly they really were. Although I cannot say why he would keep this from me, Iâm somewhat pleased to announce that Master Zandik has relations with someone who, for the sake of simplicity, I shall call his son. I know how odd it is for me to word it that way but I hope youâll believe me when I say it is for a very good reason. The situation here is even more complicated than I first thought it to be, but I think I am finally starting to glean a clearer picture now.Â
You see, even for as reticent as he is to share many personal details about himself, Master Zandik still let a few things slip when he was visiting with Lord Regrator. Iâm quite certain he did not do so on purpose, or at least not with the intention of sending me off on a wild goose chase, but that was indeed the end result of it.Â
Yes, mama, as you might suspect, I once again made the foolish decision to disregard Masterâs warnings not to wander about the house. And mere hours after the first, on top of that. I cannot recount to you the full story or even many of the specifics in how I reached the conclusion that further investigation was warranted, but I can assure you I did so with perfectly good reason in mind. Of course, I have since come to regret that decision immensely, but âŚÂ
Oh, it would certainly help if I had a better understanding of what information was expressly prohibited from being shared so I could pen my letters around those details instead of trying to side step a whole battlefield of unseen and unknown landmines. As it stands, though, I simply have to fall back on playing it overly safe to avoid letting potentially sensitive matters slip into the outside world. I promise Iâll explain everything much better to you in person, once I am able to.Â
I suppose, then, that the short and sweet of it is this: ignoring the warning signs and my own common sense, I ventured back to the basement of the house not even a full day after I finished penning my last letter to you. There I found a second lab, this one even more extensively furnished than the one upstairs where Master Zandik so often does much of his toiling. After allowing myself some curious looking around, as you know I am so wont to do, mama, I rather unexpectedly found myself in the presence of the individual who I have chosen to refer to as the Masterâs son. Heâs ⌠a surgeon, I think. Or perhaps a doctor. For reasons I canât share, Iâm starting to suspect this line of work happens to run in the family.Â
At first he didnât even seem to give my presence there with him a second thought, and he instead jumped straight to having me play assistant for him. I went along with it, not knowing what else to do at that moment and having no easy means of escape. Even so I thought the situation was going well enough, all things considered, until he pulled out a specimen of some sort and started cutting into it. Iâm sure I donât need to remind you about my fear of blood, mama.Â
The results were, of course, disastrous, much to the flaring temper of the young surgeon and to my own immense embarrassment.Â
That being said, I am no longer of the opinion that this house is haunted and am instead finding myself ever more convinced that it is indeed far more occupied than I had thought it to be. That is why it has taken me a few days to sit down and write out this letter to you, even though the two incidents happened within the same period of each other. This and the fact that, well ⌠for reasons I shant get into, Iâve been much more inclined to keeping busy than in sitting as of late.Â
As such, I have spent much of the time since just trying to figure out how I should navigate the situation from here, but I admit to having quite a bit of difficulty with this aspect. And not for a lack of effort on my part.Â
Regrettably, Master Zandik was not the slightest bit pleased to learn of my transgressions and I have had to spend much of the past few days dealing with his sour moods.Â
Please send me all the luck you can spare, mama. I hope to hear from you soon.Â
With love
 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Standing in the foyer together, your cheeks still burn with lingering excitement even as you hand the Lord Harbinger his fur lined cloak.Â
âThank you, my dear.â Pantalone says, accepting it from you most graciously. âIt really is a shame that I canât stay and play with you some more, but perhaps I will have a slightly less pressing schedule next time. That being said, I do hope you will continue to take such excellent care of Zandik in my stead, hm?âÂ
Youâre immediately struck by the urge to fidget under that condescending leer but you stubbornly hold your erect posture in place through sheer force of will. You refused to give in to that nearly overpowering compulsion to squeeze your thighs into a tight press like some sort of blithe fool in front of him.Â
Especially when your panties were already thoroughly soaked and every little shift seems to draw your attention to that uncomfortable fact. You really did not want to ruin them any further than you already had when it looked like you were due for yet another midday change of underwear once the banker took his leave. If you kept this up for much longer youâd have to start laundering them every night to avoid running out of backups to change into.Â
And it wasnât exactly helping your physical state how quickly, how seamlessly the switch had been flipped in the drawing room once Zandik had gotten his pleasure. Just like that, the heat of the moment was gone and everything immediately went back to normal, as if nothing had even happened, while you were left to awkwardly navigate these ever changing tides which was made only all the more difficult when your pussy still ached terribly for attention.Â
Attention it wouldnât be getting any time soon.Â
You couldnât very well ask that sort of thing of Pantalone, and you now find yourself anxiously fiddling with the ruffled hem of your apron while you try to ignore that terribly distracting pulse in your loins.Â
âOf course, my lord. I will do my utmost to ensure his needs are fully met. You have my word.âÂ
Even if that meant having to neglect yours.Â
His expression softening in a way that only makes it look as if he is belittling you, Pantalone reaches out to caress a tender brush of his hand across your cheek. âThatâs a good poppet. Believe me, you wouldnât be here right now if Zandik did not want you to be, so there really is no need for you to get so shy about everything. No one here is going to punish you for enjoying yourself while you carry out your duties.âÂ
Somewhat petulantly, you nudge your chin up as if in challenge to that. âBut they might do it if I refuse?âÂ
The gleam in his lovely violet eyes sharpens slightly, turning almost rueful now. âWell, I certainly wonât say thatâs not a possibility. However, judging by the way you couldnât seem to sit still and kept on squirming in your seat in the other room, something tells me that wonât be a problem for you.âÂ
Your cheeks start to feel sore from how much blushing youâve been doing these past few days, but Pantalone merely chuckles a knowing sound at your predicament before turning to leave.Â
âWait.â You impulsively blurt, hand coming up as if to reach for him but you abort the mission half of the way through. Quickly retracting your fingers when he pauses and turns to look back at you again. âI ⌠Iâm sorry for speaking out of turn like this but â may I ask something of you, my lord? Please?â
His interest seems to be mildly peaked as he settles into place again there in front of the doorway. âI donât see why not. I canât make any promises, of course, but Iâm listening.âÂ
In truth, even that was more than youâd dared to hope for. A very real part of you had naturally assumed heâd write off anything you had to say without so much as a second thought to the topic, so little did your feelings and opinions seem to matter in this place.Â
âThank you, sir. I appreciate that. And I know Iâm hardly in any position to ask for favors from you, but itâs just ⌠I was wondering. When you return to the city, if you find a moment of free time, could you perhaps ⌠check on my mother for me at the hospital? I - I havenât received any word from her ever since I came here. Iâm starting to worry.âÂ
âOh, my. That is rather troubling, isnât it?â Pantalone murmurs, bringing his hands together in a loose clasp before him. If you didnât know any better you might have thought he was indicating a spiritual impetus to the Holy Motherâs blessings, asking for her guidance and mercy, but the way he idly taps at the inlaid gem on one of his rings quietly gives him away.Â
âHave you been writing to her, then?â He goes on, a vague note of sympathy creeping into his voice now.Â
âYes, my lord. With some regularity, in fact. When I was first brought here by Lord Dottore I asked him if it was alright if I corresponded with her this way and he said it was, so long as I gave the letters to him first for them to be looked over.â
âMm.â Pantalone hums his understanding. âThat does sound like a caveat he would insist upon. He is, as you know, very conscious of the possibility that something â delicate might reach the wrong ears. Not only are you now involved in matters concerning one of Her Majestyâs Harbingers, but there is also a wealth of potential contrivances stored within this house. Both my own and Zandikâs.âÂ
You blink at that. Contrivances? Was it really something as unremarkable as he made it sound?Â
âHowever,â he goes on, smoothly changing the subject from one to the other. âIf it will put your mind at ease, it would be well within my capabilities to pay your mother a visit where sheâs currently staying at. I canât say when, exactly, that might be, or how soon Iâll return to relay whatever findings I may uncover but as long as you donât mind a little wait then Iâm perfectly amenable to this request.âÂ
That easy acquiescence manages to surprise you a fair amount, and you find yourself standing up straighter with the chilly tremor that works down your spine. âReally? You actually mean it, my lord?âÂ
âWhy, of course I do.â He chuckles, bringing one of his hands up now to cover the humored tug of his mouth. âYou certainly are adorable when you get that startled look on your face. No wonder Zandik enjoys teasing you so much. I might start to fall into the same habit too, if youâre not careful.â Â
As if he hadnât already teased you enough in both of your fleetingly short meetings.Â
As if he wasnât teasing you right now.Â
Fresh embarrassment creeps across your face and camps there, but you press your mouth into a tight line to resist the urge to argue back at him as you fish out a slip of paper from your apron to jot down your mothers name and which hospital she was at. It does sting a little, though. Zandik was only somewhat easy to deal with because his waning physical condition meant he was fairly limited on what he could easily do to exact punishments upon you. Or pleasures for that matter. Just like heâd said the night before, actually fucking you might be a task that was a bit beyond his current abilities.Â
But Pantalone suffered none of the same physical handicaps when he was both young enough to still be relatively spry and seemingly in good health. There were any number of things he could choose to do to you, if you happened to truly agitate his ire, and you werenât so sure you wanted to test your luck where he was concerned.Â
To your mild pang of surprise, though, when you hold out the hastily scrawled note to him, he ignores it completely in favor of reaching out to slip sensually gloved fingers underneath your chin, tipping your face towards him with a final lingering chuckle.Â
âHow precious you are. But fret not, my dear. Your request will be honored at my earliest convenience. Shall we seal it with a kiss?â
You give a small jolt. âWha - -âÂ
He abruptly leans down before you can get the rest out or even to think about scuttling back, enveloping you in a faint drift wind that smells of tobacco, coffee and cologne more expensive than anything youâd ever owned. With a faint rattle from the dangling chain on his glasses, Pantalone tips his head to place an unexpectedly chaste kiss to the corner of your mouth where he lingers for a drawn out moment.Â
Your face immediately grows hot enough to spark, but that is all he does once everything is said and done. No undue demands of you, no expectation of submission, not even one single attempt to disregard your boundaries beyond that simple little peck. Itâs entirely polite and congenial. Gentlemanly, even.Â
And then he straightens up, pulling back to fix you with another frustratingly charming smile. âI had a lovely time today, dear. I do hope we get to do it again soon. You take care.â
He plucks the note from your fingers and, with a creak of the old door and a blustery gust of icy wind, he is gone. Leaving you standing in the foyer staring after him like a complete twit. Even knowing his pleasant smiles were fake is still not enough to scare you away, it seemed.Â
But you donât get the chance to linger on your own foolishness for very long before the soft, tinkling chime of a small bell reaches your ears.Â
Pivoting on your heel, you make your way from the front door to step down the hall and back into the drawing room youâd just come from a few short minutes ago. You find Zandik right where youâd left him, comfortably lounging in his chair with his pants and belt now done up again. At complete and utter ease as he glances over at your entrance.Â
Scoffing a quiet sound when he sees your eager expression, he fixes you with a decidedly tired look that seems to slightly deepen the creased wrinkles on his face. âWhat took you so long, eh? You and my most trusted confidant werenât necking each other and stealing kisses out in the hall behind my back, were you?â
You try very hard not to laugh at that but canât quite seem to manage. It wasnât an entirely inaccurate way to describe what just transpired in the foyer, you think. Or, at least, itâs not hard to imagine that such a scene might look familiar to a young noblewoman who was returning to her overbearing father after sharing just a few fleeting moments in private with her arduous young lord lover before he took his leave.Â
Itâs a silly and romantic thought, but Zandik is not your father and Pantalone is not courting you any more than the old man was. And you certainly were not a lady born to polite society either.Â
Moreover, Zandik also isnât sincerely questioning your actions. In fact, upon closer inspection, you realize that he appears to be as relaxed as youâve ever seen him and not at all worried about what you may or may not have been doing with his handsome male lover. Either he was very confident in Pantaloneâs loyalties or it looked like you would need to keep in mind the potent efficacy of having his cock sucked for the next time he started to fuss at you.Â
âNo, Master, we were not, and I donât think it is me who Lord Regrator would most like to neck with.â
Youâd meant it only as a light jab, a playful nudge for one of his, but the old man faintly grimaces in reply.Â
âAh, about that. I suppose I do owe you an apology, donât I? It wasnât my intent to keep it hidden from you this entire time or anything like that. In fact, if you want the truth of it, Iâd had a feeling that I should have been more upfront with you regarding the broader picture of the situation even prior to today. I just never found the right opportunity. And not for a lack of trying, mind you.âÂ
Drawing a slow breath that makes his shoulders dramatically rise and then fall when he exhales, Zandik gives his head a rather solemn shake before going on.Â
âRegretfully I must inform you that your skittish behavior makes everything that much more difficult for me. Itâs sometimes hard to figure out what might send you running from me in tears or have you offering up that sweet little cunt for petting. In all honesty, though, you warmed up to the idea of Feofan and I far quicker and with much less fuss than I had anticipated you would. With that being said,â
Pausing, Zandik stretches his hand out across the cushioned arm of the chair to reach for you. The gesture itself is listless, imploring, perhaps even a little needy in its wretched execution, but his body language continues to read bone deep satiation. Almost like a cat thatâs recently finished helping itself to a full saucer of cream and was now stretching out in its favorite sunbeam to sleep it off. Languid. Waiting for your decision.Â
Seeing no reason not to, you step forward to come up beside him where you slip your fingers into his waiting palm. Those always cool to the touch, bony digits close around yours, sharp and jutting, stiff with arthritis, but altogether gentle. Simply holding you in place while he peers up at you from that comfortably reclined sprawl. Â
âI am â sorry I didnât tell you about us sooner. And I do mean that, girl. Even if it were not for the challenges you present, I still likely would have hesitated to go into much detail about it. As Iâm sure you can surmise, it's a bit complicated. Do you forgive me?âÂ
You nod, secretly quite tickled at how soft he is in this warm afterglow. Yes, you would certainly need to remember this method of soothing him for the next time he started to get in one of his moods. Perhaps heâd been right to call you a little minx, after all. Surely it was not normal for you to toy with the notion of leveraging sex in this way, but ⌠as long as you donât overdo it, youâd probably be fine.Â
âOf course I forgive you, Master. Even if I think calling it only a âbitâ complicated is probably an understatement, I can still understand why it might be difficult for you to talk about something like this with me. It looked like you and Lord Regrator indeed share a rather close relationship with each other. Itâs not really my place to question you or demand an explanation though. And I ⌠I know I donât always make things easy for you either.â
He gives your captured fingers a tight, shuddering squeeze. âJust as Iâm sure I certainly donât make things easy for you. I guess that makes us even.âÂ
âYes.â You relent, smiling now. âI suppose it does.â
Zandik offers you a pleasantly drained twitch of his mouth but it quickly disappears with the slow, groaning yawn that proceeds to wash over him. âGoodness. Between this and last night, I fear I might be in need of a midday nap. You and Feofan both have taken quite a lot out of me it seems.âÂ
You perk up at that. âAre you really that tired, Master? Would you like to go lie down?âÂ
Scoffing a quiet sound, he releases you so he can start to stiffly push himself upright in the chair, grabbing for his cane with a faltering hand. âDonât sound so surprised. I am an eighty year old man who was just lucky enough to have his balls drained by a pretty girl in a maid dress. Cut me some slack.âÂ
Youâre already moving to help him, the reaction to hurry to his aid almost instinctive now, but you still canât seem to stop yourself from flushing even while you work to steady him so he can get up. âMust you say it like that, Master Zandik? Sometimes it feels like Iâm living with a swarthy sailor more than a scientist.âÂ
He grunts a nearly breathless laugh at that, struggling to get his balance evened out. âThatâs all men, you silly girl. Some of us are just more polite about it than others. I am not one of them.âÂ
Thinking that went without saying, you keep your hands braced along his sides until he finally seems to stabilize his footing, standing on his own now. He turns away to lean on his cane for support instead of you as his pride would dictate, and you slowly shuffle after him when he starts to make his way towards the door.Â
âI think Iâd like to get in bed and really sleep off this fatigue. The loveseat just isnât comfortable enough. Or warm enough, for that matter.âÂ
You send him a silent, interested look.Â
There is a small little adrenaline fueled tightening in your gut that makes your pulse quicken, but you keep your expression neutral while you carefully assist him up the front staircase to the second floor. The idea that starts to form in the back of your mind isnât a very smart one, you know that only too well, but youâre also keenly aware of the fact that you may not get another chance like this again. It was rare for Zandik to retreat to his bed in the middle of the day, usually keeping himself going through grumpy, sheer force of will and the endless supply of coffee he demanded from you.Â
But there was something you needed to double check, and you just couldnât run the risk of him catching you doing it. In truth, youâve already made your decision before you even reach the top of the stairs.Â
Anticipation settles over you in earnest as you finally get him up to the landing and then trail in his wake down the corridor to his room. Once inside, he shuffles over to the side of the bed where he leans his cane up against it before settling in to undo his shirt with faltering hands. While he works on the top half, you come up behind him and reach around narrow hips to undo his belt with only a brief amount of fumbling. You were so used to dressing and undressing him by now that you make almost as quick work of it as Pantalone had down in the drawing room, although you lack much of the same sultry, seductive flair heâd shown.Â
With a rattle from the buckle you get the strip of leather loosened and then tug at the button and zipper on his slacks. The two of you work in near perfect tandem, so that by the time you start to kneel, pulling his pants down to his ankles, Zandik is beginning to shrug out of his outer jacket and then the billowing, blue button up underneath. Groaning a soft sound, he then carefully eases himself to perch on the side of the bed while you nudge his shoes and pants off, leaving the old man in only his underwear.Â
You make a concerted effort not to look at his lap as you quickly gather up his stripped clothes and set them aside to be refolded, very conscious of the fact that you were still wet and wanting. Neither of them had touched you there once all was said and done. But as much as you wanted to feel that hot, hot surge of release again you tell yourself you just canât afford to get distracted by your cunt right now.Â
And yet, when you return to his side with a fresh set of pajamas in hand, even your best attempts to stop it canât seem to keep your eyes from fixing on the front of his white underwear. He is completely soft though, only a faint lump under the fabric to indicate his current state rather than a hard, seeking tent. It was hardly any wonder, of course, given the bone deep satiation that permeated the air around him.Â
Still, you canât help but feel a small tinge of disappointment and he doesnât seem to miss the look that passes over your face, snorting a quiet laugh in response.Â
âInsatiable little thing. You really want it bad, donât you?âÂ
Despite the lack of bite in his words, you self consciously hunch your shoulders even as you start to work on getting him dressed in his night clothes. âIâm quite sure I donât know what you mean, Master Zandik.âÂ
âHah. Thatâs funny. Youâre not very good at hiding it, you know. Feofan was right. You get this glistening look of hunger in your eyes, like youâre little more than some half starved beast or something. Although, I suppose, thatâs not an entirely inaccurate description for you, eh? To still be a virgin at your age âŚâÂ
You donât think heâs being cruel in saying that, at least not with any intentional malice anyway. Just as most people of his age, he seemed to simply lack a polite filter â but of course, that was even assuming heâd ever had one to begin with. Given his ego, you arenât so sure he did.Â
Still, you deliberately keep your head bowed and your attention fixed on the night shirt youâre buttoning him into, so you wonât have to look him in the face when you speak next. âIs it really that surprising? I know what Lord Regrator said about ⌠about street urchins not living such comfortable lives and he probably wasnât wrong about that, Iâll admit. But even so. That doesnât change the fact that Iâm a person with the right to choose what I do with my body, does it?âÂ
Silently, Zandik eyes you from just a scant few inches away for a long, drawn out moment, only deigning to speak again when he reaches up to remove his monocle with a stilted sigh. âPerhaps. But youâre also a very lovely young woman, as Iâm sure you donât need me to remind you. Sometimes men â selfish men, will make that decision for you. Much like I have, Iâd wager.âÂ
Your stomach gives a tiny flip at that, wrenching softly at his acknowledgement. At least he was self aware enough to admit it, even if that wouldnât change the outcome of anything.Â
âI donât think Iâd lump you in with the likes of them, Master Zandik.â You tell him truthfully, kneeling back down now to work his feet into the legs of his cozy sleep bottoms. âForgive me for being blunt, sir, but although itâs not necessarily wrong to say you also have a selfish streak, I donât believe that this is the only reason for your behavior towards me. Itâs just as Lord Regrator said, isnât it? You havenât been shown much kindness in your life and youâre ⌠lonely. Arenât you?âÂ
The following stretch of quiet hangs heavy for but a fleetingly brief moment and then, startling you slightly, Zandik barks a sudden laugh.Â
âWhat a precocious little girl you are. And smarter than you look, if you want my opinion. I canât say I expected such a sharp sense of perception from you, but âŚâ Pausing, he puts his head to one side and squints down at you, as if a thought has just struck upon him, right as you finish feeding the loose material over both his ankles.Â
And when you slowly stand to help him up, he tracks the motion with sharp, hawk-eyed interest now, one hand lifting to take hold of your arm in a sharp squeeze as he struggles to his feet in front of you. The slight hunch of his spine puts him at nearly perfect eye level with you, and you questioningly look into his face when you notice the imperative way he grasps at you, refusing to let you go.Â
âAnswer me something. Where did you come from, girl? Who were your parents?âÂ
You blink at that, genuinely taken aback by his sudden interest in the topic. âMine? O - oh, surely thatâs not actually anything so noteworthy?âÂ
Your attempt to wave off the question fails miserably, and his fingers dig deeper into the meat of your bicep when you try to move away, stopping you.Â
âYou know I expect an answer when I ask you something. Tell me.âÂ
It looked like he was right back to his usual grumpy self again. That comfortable lull certainly hadnât lasted long.Â
âM - my apologies, Master. I didnât realize it was such a ⌠pressing question.â You stammer, swallowing hard to clear your throat of obstruction. âI come from Snezhnograd where I was born and raised my whole life. This is really the first time Iâve ever been anywhere else. My father wasnât anything special, just another soldier in Her Majestyâs armies. Heâs been missing in action for almost ten years, and my mother ⌠w - well, technically sheâs just a civilian now, like me. But she used to be a high ranking member of the church. A â a deacon, if I remember correctly.âÂ
Zandikâs expression falters at that, and then seems to slacken with what you think just might be sincere surprise.Â
âI see.â He says rather curtly, struggling to recover from whatever had just caught him off guard. âSo thatâs why you are not only perfectly literate despite coming from poverty but you also have the manners one might expect to see in the courts. How curious. And I take it, then, that she raised you in virtue and strict expectation?â
You nod slowly, unsure how to read this reaction from him. âYes, sir. She gave up her own life of moral integrity for my father, but she still taught me many of the same lessons that the church espouses. I think she wanted me to ⌠live a proper, respectable existence despite being a commoner.â
A wholly mirthless laugh punches out of him then, sharp and to the point. âAnd yet here you are.âÂ
âYes. Here I am.âÂ
Slowly, his fingers begin to ease up their pinching death grip on your arm and then finally fall away another moment later. You hesitate briefly, uncertain how to proceed from here, but when he makes no further move to speak, you cautiously bend down to grab the top hem of his slumped pants. With gentle discretion for his current demeanor, you tug them up to sit on the ridged jut of his hips, somehow soft yet pointy at the same time, and then neatly tie off the drawstring to keep them held in place.Â
Only when youâve finished and start to retract your hands from his person does he finally draw an uncharacteristically tentative breath.Â
âLet me ask you one more thing, girl. And be truthful with me, now. I wonât tolerate any lying. Do you worship the gods the same way? Do you believe in divine authority over mortal lives, as Iâm sure you were taught to?âÂ
Frowning slightly, you give yourself a moment to think on that.Â
Then, with exceeding gentleness, you reach back out to straighten his sleep shirt where it had gotten rucked and slightly twisted in the fastening of his pants.Â
âNo, Master Zandik. I donât think I do. And itâs not so much that I donât believe in their dominion to rule over humanity, especially not when our own Tsaritsa is so very powerful and great. I just â have to wonder, sometimes. Thatâs all. If itâs really the natural way of the world or if it was ⌠orchestrated to be like this. And who gave them the authority they wield?â
Finishing your fussing with his clothes, you settle back on your heels and expectantly peer up at him only to find Zandik looking at you with what might very well be a spark of pride lighting up his pale eyes.Â
âThatâs a good answer.â He tells you, surprisingly candid. âA very good one, in fact. I have to say, Iâm rather impressed with your ability to think critically and form your own conclusions instead of blithely parroting whatever tripe you were spoonfed in your childhood. Itâs one of the indicators of a high intellect, you know.âÂ
Your brows slowly lift. âGoodness, Master Zandik. Are you praising me in earnest right now?âÂ
His expression turns rueful, his coarse mouth tugging sharply to one side even as he reaches across the short space that separates you from him to give your side an unusually playful pinch.Â
âAnd donât let it get to your head, girl. I never was very forthcoming when it comes to compliments so youâd best not expect many more of them from me. But I believe that is quite enough of that unpleasant discussion. Help me into bed, now.âÂ
Quickly doing just that, you hustle to get the sheets pulled back on one side of the mattress and then use your hands to assist him under the covers, where he immediately heaves a very tired sigh as soon as his head hits the pillow. Flitting over him for another moment longer, you make sure heâs nudged far enough over not to risk rolling off the bed, taking care to tuck him in nice and snug to ensure he doesnât take a chill while at rest.Â
âWould you like a fire in the hearth, Master?â You ask, right as youâre tugging the blankets up to his chin.Â
Leaning over him like that, you donât see his nearest hand snaking out from underneath the duvet you just finished placing on top of him. Itâs only when you feel a rough, suggestive nudge of sharp knuckles over the front of your breast do you give a little start, looking down at him in surprise.Â
âNo, you silly girl. I suspect that thoughts of this sumptuous young body of yours will keep me warm enough for now.â Zandik murmurs, lightly dragging the back of his hand across your nipple which all too readily springs up at the contact to poke through your top. âAs much as Iâd like to play with you right now, Iâm afraid I simply donât have the stamina for it anymore. Youâll have to forgive this old man for that too. But after Iâve rested up some, perhaps youâd like to try a little experiment with me? Iâm curious to see how your excitable cunt reacts to having my mouth on it.â
The entire world seems to tilt sideways around you, the edges of your vision faintly blurring from the sheer intensity of the arousal that rips through you.Â
Faltering unsteadily there on your feet, you have to force your lungs to pull in a slow, hissing breath. âY - you ⌠you want to put your mouth on me, Master?âÂ
âOf course I do. Iâm sure you taste just as sweet as you look. I dare say you might even come to find you prefer my tongue over my fingers, once all is said and done. Thereâs only one way to find out though.âÂ
You whimper softly in response to that, unable to hold it back. It felt like you were dangerously close to fainting dead away from how intensely your pussy clenches, squeezing down on itself as if it could eke out even just some small, shuddering relief if it only tightened enough.Â
Of course that doesnât work, though, and Zandik merely chuckles a low, rumbling sound at the needy, disoriented expression on your face as he drops his hand back to the sheets.Â
âYouâre a very good girl for me. Thank you. Now let this old man get some sleep or your cunt will never get properly eaten. Wake me up for supper if I havenât called for you by then.âÂ
â⌠y - yes, Master Zandik. Rest well.âÂ
Somewhat awkwardly giving the blankets over his chest one last, fidgety pat, you straighten up and turn, moving first to the window to draw the curtains closed and envelope the room in some approximation of darkness before then heading to the door.Â
Out in the hall, you have to take a moment just to catch your breath while you struggle to reorient yourself. It really was too much on your poor body. You were sensitive and eager anyway, likely due to ignoring your own physical needs and urges for so long. Overly excitable, as he liked to call it. But dragging it out like this, your arousal ratcheting tighter and tighter with each fleeting encounter, was a unique misery unto itself. Every inch of you felt like it was tingling, aching, begging to be touched. Licked. Sucked, and whatever else. It felt like it really was going to drive you mad.Â
Unable to make yourself move from the spot, your cheeks feel like theyâre positively on fire as you slowly ease back to rest against the outside of Zandikâs door. This thrumming need, the pulsing desire deep inside your cunt makes it impossible to think of literally anything else. Neither common decency nor your secret plan to go snooping around seemed to matter anymore as you numbly peer down at yourself. Taking stock. Working out the logistics.Â
Hesitantly, one of your hands comes up to curve over the weight of your own breast and give it a light squeeze. Itâs nothing like the way Zandik does it though, nowhere near as sharp or pinching, so you try again. A little harder this time.Â
But your fingers are much too soft, too feminine. What you craved was the ache of stiff bony ridges, the arthritic jut of digits that donât seem to know their own strength sometimes and the coarse, cool to the touch pads of fingers that had tinkered, built and disassembled for a lifetime.Â
Even when you find your nipple, still tentatively pebbled underneath your clothes from the last time heâd touched you, fitfully tugging on it now, you find that it does very little to alleviate the tension between your thighs. It just seems to make you want it to be him touching you even more, and your mind slowly, inevitably drifts towards the other side of the door.Â
Would he welcome you into his bed if you went back inside and crawled under the blankets with him, pitifully mewling about how badly you need his attention and that you couldnât wait until later? Would he pull you in close to him, safe and snug, and secure, pinned up against his side just like the night before, so you could only squirm in place while he fingered your cunt open?Â
Such an intense shudder tears through you at the hazy fantasy that your legs almost seem to turn into limp, overcooked noodles and you nearly collapse into a heap. No, as much as you wanted it you just couldnât do it. Your master already told you he was tired from the morningâs excitement and he would play with you later.Â
You should focus on your other objective while you still could instead of wasting time with this. You should âŚ
Impulsively, you slide your other hand forward over your hip and reach under the skirt to find your panties. They register as dump to the touch but you choose to ignore that for the time being while you experimentally caress over the outline of your slit. Trying to mimic the way Zandik had touched you there, recalling the pressure, the speed, the angle at which he dug those rude fingertips into fleshy lips to make them part for him.Â
Nothing seems to work though. It just doesnât feel right and, in turn, it doesnât feel good. At least not the way youâve come to expect it to, and you cling desperately to the memory of his masterful hands playing in your pussy as if he was already intimately familiar with it. Even if you did manage to bring yourself to orgasm, finding your release out there in the hall, would it really even feel all that satisfying in the end?
Quickly growing frustrated with all of this useless pawing at yourself, you drop your hands with an impatient huff. This clearly wasnât going to work. You would just have to wait, and hope that Zandik felt up to the task when he awoke. How very unfair it was.Â
How very disgraceful.Â
Self consciously straightening up from the door, you run your hands over yourself to smooth out your uniform and, hopefully, get a grip on your baser urges. Youâre not so sure it works but, finally, you manage to unstick your feet and drift away from his room like a lost specter.Â
Luckily by the time you reach the bottom of the stairs you start to feel a bit more in control of your motor functions, even if it does occur to you much too late that you should have changed your panties before coming down. It's not worth the extra trip though and, determined to be at least somewhat productive, you put that out of your mind as you step back into the drawing room to clean up after the Lord Harbingerâs visit.Â
Youâre fairly chagrined by the much depleted cigarette butt you find floating in Pantaloneâs cup of half drunk coffee where he must have dropped it when he stood to come around the table. But, you comfort yourself, at least he hadnât put it out on the china itself or even the nice tablecloth.Â
Making quick work of gathering up the used place settings, you then carry it all back into the kitchen where youâre greeted by the resounding silence of an open, empty space. Here, you take a moment to just surreptitiously glance around to make sure you really are alone and that nothing seemed to be out of order. All was exactly as youâd left it though and, feeling more than a bit silly, you take your burden over to the big sink where you start to wash everything up.Â
It certainly would have been nice if there was at least one other person on staff here, so that you wouldnât have had to do everything yourself when Zandik had neither the ability or the desire to help you with these menial tasks. Your one and only saving grace thus far was the weekly Fatuus deliveries that kept things stocked and well prepared, from a never ending supply of coffee beans, tea tins, flour, jams and spices, meats and eggs, and milk, which you could only guess had been arranged and paid for by the Doctor.Â
But no matter how you sliced it or what angle you tried to look at it from, there simply was not enough food for more than two people. Not in the cupboards or the icebox, and certainly not in the crates that were dropped off by masked men and women every Tuesday. If any of it had started to go missing you certainly would have noticed it by now.Â
Did that, in turn, mean that the Doctor didnât know about the mysterious presence down in the cellar? He certainly had not accounted for a third person's provisions as far as you could tell. You were relatively certain of that, and Zandik had never said anything to you that might suggest he was aware of it either.Â
Not until today, that is, when he and Pantalone had discussed some vague, nebulous âothersâ between themselves.Â
That hadnât even been the only strange, somewhat worrisome comment theyâd made to each other, but as you stand there replaying everything back in your head you find that you are more certain than ever what you must do next. Even if it was only to assuage your fears, at least you could put this foolishness to rest.Â
Finishing up with the last delicate saucer, you set it aside in the drying rack, pull the plug on the drain and then slowly turn in place, wiping your hands on your apron. The hallway that would lead back to that unassuming cellar door in the rear of the house was just outside the kitchen. It wouldnât even take you five whole minutes to find it again. You could be in and out in even less time, just long enough to check whatâs going on in there and then right back out. Easy. And stupid. Â
Drawing a steadying breath, you decide to just get it over with and step across the paneled flooring to come out in the connecting corridor.Â
Itâs as still and quiet as you would expect an otherwise empty house to be, the sound of your shoes moving over the wood grain the only sound you can make out. Youâre almost embarrassed by how much braver you feel in the light of day, how little your heart pounds out a nervous staccato rhythm as you follow the long hallway down until you reach the door in question a few moments later.Â
You only hesitate there in front of it for a brief moment before you reach up and wrench the door open with a hard yank.Â
Darkness and silence alike rush up to greet you as you squint through the gloom of low filtered, dust mote ridden light coming in from the small window along the adjacent wall behind you. It doesnât do much to actually illuminate the interior of the tiny room though, and you somewhat belatedly realize you were going to need a lamp. Youâd been so focused on amping yourself up to do this that the thought hadnât even occurred to you until now.Â
Leaving the door ajar, you backtrack down a ways to a low table youâd passed. Keeping one eye on the far end of the hall, you open one of the drawers but find nothing that will help you. Opening the other, you find a half melted candlestick and an old box of matchsticks. You take a moment to wrap the bottom in your handkerchief so that you will not burn your hand when it starts to melt, and then quickly get the wick lit.Â
Back down you go, nudging the door open and then cautiously leaning inside. And this time you make absolutely certain to double check the immediate walls to ensure that someone isnât lurking just within. It really is completely empty though.Â
You inch a little further inside, scanning the floor in search of your missing slipper but thereâs no sign of it at all. There also isnât any evidence of your broken lamp, either, youâre quite disconcerted to find. Someone had cleaned it up, and ⌠and taken off with your slipper while they were at it?Â
Perplexed and more than slightly frightened of what this discovery likely meant, you swing your attention up to examine the bookshelves a little closer, like youâd wanted to do the night before. The spines are indeed brittle and ancient, just as youâd initially suspected, and in running your finger over a few of them you soon realize why they seemed so different from those in the upstairs library.Â
They appeared to be written in a different language. Not one you recognized and nothing you could decipher, but all of them seem to be printed in decidedly strange characters that you couldnât recall ever seeing before. You naturally have to assume that they must be exceptionally rare then, although you are admittedly a bit surprised Zandik or the Doctor, or even Lord Regrator for that matter would have these here instead of in a highly curated collection to show them off.Â
Did that mean these were possibly for personal use, then?Â
Deciding to give up on your perusal of the books for right now, knowing you canât put it off any longer, you hold your candle up and turn towards the hidden door on the right. It really was so thoroughly sandwiched between the two shelves on either side that you very well might have missed it again if you didnât already know it was there.Â
Your nerves start to make themselves known as you step up to it but you quietly tell yourself everything is fine. If someone or something really was on the other side you could just run away, same as you did last night. As far as you could tell that unknown entity hadnât even tried to give chase. But it was better to know now than to risk wondering and jumping at every curious shadow in the house for the foreseeable future.Â
Reaching for the knob with your free hand, you give it a careful turn and the catch gives with an equally small click. You ease it open just enough to put your ear close, listening, but all you can make out is more resounding silence. Thereâs a small draft coming through the crack though, so you know this one must actually lead somewhere.Â
You allow yourself another slow breath in, holding it inside your lungs as you start to ease the door the rest of the way open. Your opposite hand comes up with the candle and you soon find that youâre peering down into a dark stairwell into what appears to be a bottomless void. The darkness is truly oppressive down there and that alone is nearly enough to send you scampering away in tears, but you stubbornly press on. You have to.Â
The stairs creak softly while you make your way down, one halting step at a time, with the flickering candle held out as far in front of you as you can reach. Youâre starting to sweat, both from fear and how stifling the air starts to become the lower you go. Itâs decidedly freezing in here though, and you conversely begin to shiver.Â
You finally spot the floor what feels like an eternity later and you gratefully step down onto the rough bricks with your heart in your throat. This new space is cramped, yet more bricks on either side of you, but when you nudge the candle towards the right you see that there is yet another door.Â
Almost feeling a bit exasperated at this point, you heave a shuddering exhale and grab at the new door handle, yanking it wide open.Â
And youâre immediately greeted by glaringly bright illumination that positively sears your retinas to make you cringe back as if youâd been scalded, dropping the candle in your reeling surprise. Momentarily blinded, your panic rapidly swells and crests to leave you mindless with it. You just didnât understand. Why would there be light down here?Â
It takes a long, painfully harrowing moment for you to blink the stars from your eyes, and when you finally glance up you realize quite immediately that youâre standing at the threshold of a lab.Â
You know this for certain after spending so much time with Zandik in the one upstairs, but this is not only much bigger but much fancier too. The equipment looks newer, for starters, and you disbelievingly drag your attention over the vials and beakers, test tubes and complicated machinery, the likes of which youâd never seen before. Wires and bulbs, and circuitry, stacks of paperwork littering various surfaces, some of it neat and tidy while other piles were a haphazard mess. Sterile tools and various instruments, gadgets and devices you couldnât even begin to guess the use of. It looked like a well furnished playground for a whole fleet of scientists.Â
But ⌠but this didnât even begin to make any sense.Â
Even if you were to assume that this was simply another one of Zandikâs work spaces, perhaps even his true lab whereas the other was more for idle tinkering, why in the Tsaritsaâs name would he have set all this up in the basement? There was no feasible way he could have ever possibly managed all those stairs by himself. And that was to say absolutely nothing of the fact that you spent almost every waking minute with him. He never could have found a chance to sneak off by himself to come down here.Â
And yet â as you look over everything you canât help but notice that there is a very limited amount of dust or cobwebs, and you donât spot even so much as a hint of the rats Zandik claimed were living in the cellar. As far as you can tell the space looked like it was used regularly, and rather lovingly at that.Â
A very real part of you wants to turn tail and beat a hasty retreat back up the stairwell. To slip back into whatever constituted for your normal life around here and pretend youâd never seen anything. That would be the smart thing to do. You know it would.Â
Despite your better judgement, though, you soon find yourself inching further inside to peer around at everything, completely dumbstruck by all that you see. Even as it all comes as a great, reeling shock to you, you still canât help being impressed by it. In many ways this was what youâd envisioned when the Doctor had rather curtly informed you that you were now working for a much accomplished genius. Youâd thought he meant Zandik.Â
Was this possibly his lab then? Was it really possible that this was where that bird masked fiend retreated to, out of sight and out of mind, only to reappear later when you least expected him?Â
That may have been an otherwise perfectly reasonable explanation, but ⌠that didnât account for the strange person youâd seen up in the landing last night. You felt relatively certain that it had not been the Doctor skulking about in the dark. The hair wasnât right, for one, and those blood red eyes âŚÂ
Youâd never seen the Doctorâs eyes before, as he always insisted on keeping them hidden behind the featureless mask he wore, so you supposed maybe they could have been his. Somehow you very much doubted that though.Â
Feeling even more confused than when youâd started, you tip toe down the aisle formed between desks and tables, and machinery banks, giving everything a curious look over. Most of it you couldnât even begin to guess at what it might be used for, but the more you glance around the more you start to notice something that strikes you as particularly odd.Â
Even without any formal discernment between all of the tools and staging set ups, and the heavy cabled equipment, it looks to you like there might be a handful of different projects taking place all at once. One table you pass looks like itâs being used to assemble what appears to be a prosthetic arm made up of sheet metal and wires. Another is housing a series of petri dishes with something very much alive swimming around in them. At a dim lit monitor you can see a progress bar flashing at you, showing that whatever task the internal computer had been programmed for was currently at thirty-six percent completion.Â
It very much leaves you in awe of all that you observe. You couldnât even begin to fathom how any one person could possibly find the time or the brain power to split their attention between so many things, so many varied pursuits at the same time.Â
Unless there really was more than one.Â
âThe others are, for the most part, content to simply stay away.âÂ
Thatâs what Zandik had said in the drawing room earlier.Â
But youâd just naturally assumed heâd meant that they stay away from the house. Not that they merely stayed in the cellar, minding their business.Â
Such a violent chill creeps up your spine at that thought you start to feel well and truly faint. Were there really multiple people living down here? And youâd never even noticed?Â
Dazed and confused, you find yourself stumbling from one piece of equipment to the next studiously cluttered desk, and then on to the next strangely colored fluid in a corked test tube. You couldnât even begin to make any sense of what you were seeing, for the most part, but towards a far back wall you finally spot something that looks to be at least somewhat recognizable.Â
It very much resembles an operating theater, with a big, powerful, three-bulb light hanging over a steel gurney table. There are cabinets and shelves lining the immediate area, clearly separated and sectioned off from the rest of the lab's other designated stations. Thereâs a decidedly heavy atmosphere around the sterile corner itâs pressed back into, and you feel mildly nauseous when you look at it. But still, you wander closer.Â
Everything is clean, thankfully, and the only smell that invades your nostrils now is that of cleaning agents, antiseptic and soap. If you didnât know any better you might have even thought it was just a staged prop of some sort that had never seen any real cutting or slicing, given how unused everything looked at just a glance. But even you were not so naive as to truly believe that.Â
Giving the steel table with its drainage troughs a wide breadth of space, you instead set your sights on the small utility table set up just behind it. Thereâs an open book laying across the surface and when you lean close, scanning the page, you can see that itâs some kind of medical text. You have no interest in the stuff yourself but you do find it curious indeed. If your suspicions were correct then at least one of them had a keen interest in the science of medicine â whoever they were.Â
If you had to guess based on what youâve seen so far, you would probably wager that at least one had an interest in machinery and mechanics. Another with biology, perhaps even virology specifically. And although you couldnât be sure, youâd seen one desk that looked to be so full of heavy tomes that you could only surmise they were hungry for broader knowledge as a whole rather than a single narrowed down subject.Â
Ever so slightly moving the open book aside, you find a small stack of papers underneath. The handwriting is neat and precise, sharp, and you scan over the nearly incomprehensible medical jargon in search of any clues as to what might be going on down here. Many of the words are complete gibberish to you, though, and you struggle to make any sense of it. So much for the literacy Zandik had lauded you for.Â
Towards the bottom of the top sheet, however, you finally spot something that looks easy enough to understand. âTest Sample: PT0083.âÂ
Your head comes up to scan the equipment laid out on the narrow work station. Sure enough, situated in front of a row of neatly organized medical journals, you spot a steel rack full of vials. It looks like thereâs some strange, thick fluid inside, and you carefully reach out to spin the labels towards you, one by one, until you find it. PT0083.Â
You know exactly how much you should really leave this stuff alone, but your gnawing curiosity ultimately wins out and you ever so gently start to ease the vial out of its holder.Â
Lifting it up at an angle makes the fluid inside run towards the opposite end, so dark it almost looks black. Itâs only when youâre watching the last little bit cling to the interior of the glass does it strike an uncomfortable chord within you. Was that ⌠blood?Â
You come very close to regurgitating everything in your stomach in a sudden, wretching heave, fumbling now to put it back where you got it from. But either your hands are too clammy with sweat or your recoiling grip on the vial is too weak, because you drop it to the table with an ear shattering CLINK!Â
Your hand instinctively snaps out to cover the petite vial, stopping it from either bouncing or rolling away, as your heart pounds such a violent rhythm against your ribcage your breathing starts to come short. Silently praying you hadnât broken it, you cautiously lift your palm to find that the delicate lab equipment is indeed still in one piece. By some unexpected miracle you hadnât even so much as cracked the thing.Â
You exhale a very relieved sigh at that discovery.Â
âWhat are you doing with the equipment?â
To say you nearly jump right out of your own skin would be an understatement.Â
Your soul actively leaves your body for all of a single, terrible heartbeat before returning just in time for you to spin around, back pressed painfully tight to the work station.Â
The man that steps into the little operation theater from around the back of a dark blackout curtain is neither Zandik, the Doctor or even the mysterious individual youâd run into last night. Youâre quite certain of that because this one is wearing a pair of thin glasses perched atop the bridge of his nose. Other than Zandikâs monocle youâre sure youâve never seen any of them wearing any sort of lenses before, not even the one with his eyes showing through his mask.Â
Stunned into mute silence, your mouth works even when nothing comes out, not even a peep, but the bespectacled man doesnât so much as glance up at you.Â
His attention remains fixed on a clipboard he holds from the top, bracing it along the length of his forearm as he almost thoughtfully seems to step past the steel medical table in the center. Even without looking away from whatever heâs reading, he manages to bypass it completely and come stand next to you in front of the small work table.Â
Itâs like your overtaxed brain has completely shut down now as you stare up at him, realizing in a vague, distant sort of way that his height reminds you very much of the Doctor. You know itâs not him though. Even with his mouth hidden behind a perfectly clean white surgical mask, you can already tell that this one is much more serious and less prone to whimsy. Itâs in the almost bored set of his brows.Â
Gods, who could have ever thought youâd meet someone who would make you think of the Doctor as whimsical?Â
âHere.â He abruptly speaks, passing you the clipboard, again, without even looking at you.Â
Reeling and shellshocked, and not to mention highly confused, you automatically take it from him without even thinking.Â
âFamiliarize yourself with the objective. You have five minutes.âÂ
Once again your mouth opens, nothing comes out, and so you close it.Â
Dropping your attention to the clipboard, you have to force your vibrating eyes to fix upon the words as you frantically look them over only to belatedly realize that you were holding the damn thing upside down. Fumbling to spin it upright in your hands, you give it another try. All that greets you is yet more medical jargon that you donât understand.Â
âU - um âŚâ
Heâs already walking away though, angling towards what you think might be a huge icebox standing upright against the opposite wall. Not knowing what else to do, you flit after him with the clipboard clutched to your chest like a shield.Â
âSir? Uh, I - Iâm sorry. Sir. If you could just - -â
Itâs as if he doesnât even hear you as he yanks hard on the outside handle to pull the freezer door open. You give a faint squeak and cower back from the thick plumes of icy, heavily condensed steam that billow out from the container, sinking to the floor and disappearing in a fine mist. Rather surreptitiously, you peer inside around his shoulder, but all you truly process are vague lumpy shapes that make no sense to you in that moment.Â
Entirely unconcerned by your presence, he reaches inside with a gloved hand, plucks something up from one of the shelves, pulls it out and slams the door closed.Â
You jump at the sound but he is, once again, already in motion, stepping past you to come up with the steel table. Youâre right in tow though, desperately trying to get his attention, and you move to stand next to him just in time to watch him slam whatever it is onto the surface with a near deafening BANG.Â
Whimpering softly in the back of your throat, you glance down at the table and something in your gut slowly starts to turn with the vague note of comprehension that sparks in the back of your mind.Â
âIs that ⌠is that meat?âÂ
Finally, the bespectacled man shoots you a sidelong, utterly droll glance. âDidnât you read the paperwork like I told you to?âÂ
Swallowing hard, you send him an utterly helpless look. âThatâs wh - what Iâve been trying to tell you, sir. I donât know what any of this means.â
One of his brows gives a rather condescending quirk at that. âWhat sort of assistant canât even read a basic objectives sheet?â
You have no idea how to respond to that, staring up at him in utter bewilderment. Assistant? He thought you were here. To assist him?Â
For a harrowing stretch of seconds the two of you just stand there, looking at one another.Â
Then, he turns to fetch something from a nearby drawer, momentarily giving you his back.Â
Desperately trying to kick start your brain, you decide to try again. âI - Iâm so sorry. I think thereâs been a mistake. A big one. I donât even have the first clue about any of these medical terms. I donât know what any of this means. Iâm not a lab assistant.âÂ
âWell, it looks like youâre just going to have to do your best then, wonât you?âÂ
You draw a sharp breath to insist that you canât, you wonât.Â
But then he turns from the drawer with what you can only think to describe as a meat cleaver, the kind meant to cut through flesh as if it were butter. Long, sharply pointed, and so finely serrated that it gleams faintly in the overhead light.Â
It is at this exact moment that you come very close to wetting yourself.Â
âW - wh - ⌠wait. What are you doing âŚâ
You start to back away when he retraces his steps, holding the clipboard up as if it will actually save you and ward off any of his attacks. He isnât even looking at you though, his almost disinterested gaze fixed upon the lump of meat on the exam table.Â
Without so much as a single word, his arm comes up, blade glinting, and swings back down with a vengeance, cleaving right into whatever it was heâd placed out.Â
And you watch, utterly horrified beyond even your wildest imagination, as the hunk splits down the middle to a thick, fleshy THWUMP! that separates it into two halves. Revealing that what youâd thought was perhaps a frozen rump or even a breast is, in fact, a heart.Â
A heart that still beats against all odds and logical explanation.Â
Pumping its oxygen carrying blood through the attached ventricles, the valves, the veins, on what was once a closed off circuit that fed infinitely into itself, but now spills out all over the table. In an abrupt wash of vibrant, futilely congealing hemoglobin, it runs into the narrow trenches along the sides of the table which proceed to carry it all down, down, down where it at last feeds off into a round drain.Â
Your mind completely short circuits at what it is youâre seeing.Â
And then your consciousness starts to rapidly recede, darkness rushing in to consume you, when you faint dead away from the shock.Â
 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
You donât immediately recall what happened when you finally start to come to. All you really know with any certainty is that everything feels like itâs spinning around you dizzily fast, making you feel even more nauseous than you already did. And also the sensation of something squeezing down tight on your ankle. Youâre very aware of that too.Â
Groaning a quiet sound that shudders and breaks as you roll your head forward, utterly disoriented, you force your eyes to crack open. It takes a few seconds for your vision to adjust, to catch up and process what youâre looking at as the smothering darkness slowly recedes, only for you to realize youâre staring down at your own lap. If the familiar shape of your thighs didnât give it away then the flouncy housekeeping uniform certainly did.Â
âWha - at happened ⌠to me?â You croak, almost startled by the rough quality of your own voice.Â
But movement down by your left foot catches your attention, rouses you further out of your lolling stupor, and you look to see the bespectacled man from before kneeling there. Head bowed over the task of cinching a strap into place. Around your ankle.Â
You give a great start when you finally manage to make sense of what youâre seeing, jolting upright to scuttle away from him. Or would have, had your wrists not already been locked in place along the armrests of the highly uncomfortable chair heâs got you in. Itâs hard and angular, with only a small plank seat that barely accommodates your bottom and steel stirrups that are not unlike the foot holds on a wheelchair. Clearly some sort of medical contraption.Â
Frantic, jittery panic rapidly rushes in to make your breath come short as you give your limbs another desperate tug, only to confirm what you already knew.Â
It was too late. You were as good as trapped.Â
If you had woken up even just a few moments earlier, you might have been able to - -Â
âAh, youâre finally conscious again. Thatâs good. I was starting to wonder if I should fetch the smelling salts.âÂ
Nervously flexing your fingers as if to ensure they were still yours and they still worked, you send the man at your feet a deeply troubled look. Everything was still a bit blurry at the edges, not quite clear enough in your mind to trigger real recollection. But the more you stare at him the more it gradually starts to come back into focus. And then you remember it a little too clearly.Â
That still beating heart.Â
Even if youâd wanted to lie to yourself that it was anything other than that, there was just no mistaking what you had seen. The veins and ventricles gave it away. From the outside it had looked like little more than a lump of shapeless flesh but on the inside âŚÂ
Feeling sickeningly queasy, you turn your face away and screw your eyes shut, trying and failing not to hyperventilate. Gods, that mental image was going to haunt you for the rest of your life!Â
âOh, blessed mother. What was that thing?â
Evidently satisfied that all four limbs were secured now, the man sedately rises to his feet where he proceeds to peer down at you with a truly demeaning edge in his expression. Youâd thought Pantalone was bad, the way his polite smiles and pretty violet eyes always seemed to carry with them just a hint of condescension, but this one is somehow so much worse. He doesnât even try to hide the fact heâs staring at you as if you were little more than a bug to be studied and then squashed.
âDo you truly wish to know?â He asks you lightly, though not without just a smidge of irony lacing his tone.Â
âI ⌠I think some sort of explanation would be nice. Havenât I earned even that much?âÂ
The bespectacled man gives his head a slow, perfectly controlled shake. âYou misunderstand me. I am asking if youâre certain youâll even understand my explanation in the first place, or if I would simply be wasting my time and energy. I prefer not to do either, if I can help it. Iâm sure it goes without saying that I will not be answering any of your questions if itâs just going to go in one ear and out the other.âÂ
You send him an utterly bewildered look, almost too stunned to take offense to that decidedly unwarranted jab at your intelligence. He really did sound just like the Doctor with that arrogant, mile wide ego and an apparent love for hearing the sound of his own voice.Â
And now that youâve stopped long enough to get an actually good look at him you notice his hair, too, is that same pale, wispy shade of blue as well.Â
For a split second you think theyâre one and the same. The Doctor without his bird mask. But you know that canât be. The hair lengths were wrong, and so was the overall style. This oneâs was much shorter, cropped nearly down to his skull, but even that is not enough to truly hide the fluffy wave in those powdery locks. The same kind of wave in Zandikâs hair, even though his had started to dull and fade.Â
Your eyes immediately go round as saucers. âWho ⌠who are you?âÂ
Clicking an impatient sound with his tongue, he brings a latex gloved hand up to adjust the set of his glasses. âEither you arenât very bright or youâre asking me something you already know the answer to. Which is it? Choose wisely.âÂ
You canât help the way you cower back from him, even when you already know you have nowhere to go. This one seemed to be utterly ruthless in his exacting nature, and what an ass on top of that. âI - I have my suspicions. Very strong ones, in fact. Will you tell me if Iâm right?âÂ
âI will not.âÂ
Deflating slightly, you warily follow the motion when he folds his arms behind his back and sets in to pace a slow path around the chair youâre strapped to. Just like the Doctor had back in the Northland Bank. Oh, god. Was it really him?Â
âI think Iâd rather watch you squirm with the not knowing than put your worries to rest just yet. Maybe Iâll give you my answer by the time weâve finished with your exam, if Iâm feeling generous enough. But I probably wonât.â
He disappears behind you then with a soft creak of his boots on the ground, sedate and perfectly casual about it. Not being able to see him or what heâs doing makes your fear skyrocket, and you quickly begin to suck in quick, painfully short gasps of air. That knife heâd had, oh god, the knife.Â
âHowever,â he goes on, his voice slithering out from somewhere just behind you. âIf you promise me youâll listen carefully and not interrupt to ask anymore stupid questions, I just might give you the explanation youâd wanted.â
Thinking it might be a good idea to keep him talking so he doesnât have the time to do anything else, you quickly nod your head, not knowing if he can even see it. âYes. Y - yes, Iâd appreciate that very much, sir. I promise Iâll listen. Iâm a good listener.â
âVery well then.â Coming up along the other side of you, the man in the surgical mask reaches out to curl his gloved hand under your chin, mercilessly tugging your face back to make you look up at him.Â
âWhat you saw, and the experiment you so rudely botched, I might add, was a test of the new rejuvenation elixir Iâve been working on. After previous studies were conducted, I began to form a hypothesis around the idea that the effects of aging on the body might be stymied through the blood rather than on the molecular level, as I had previously conjectured. It took some time, of course, but I was at last able to make the necessary adjustments to the biological hard coding of the red and white blood cells â that is, I reprogrammed them, you see â to take on the function of self sustaining, semi organic nano bots. Ones that do not decay over time or slow down their physiologic imperatives no matter how much time has passed. Or what external conditions they might be subjected to.â
It feels like your eyes are about to start spinning around inside your head, but you more or less understood the gist of it. Or at least, you think you do.Â
âT - thatâs why you ⌠had it in the freezer?â
He lifts his brows at you, entirely condescending. âVery good. Perhaps you are not quite as dull as you look.â Nudging your chin a little higher up, he puts his head to one side to study you from a slightly different angle. Behind the thin, delicately framed glasses, his red eyes narrow upon you in assessment.Â
Wait. Red eyes?Â
He abruptly releases you before you can examine them any closer, sauntering the rest of the way around the chair to stand down by your feet again.Â
âYes, that is exactly right, my dear assistant. Before you had the nerve to collapse on the floor in a useless heap, Iâm sure you observed exactly what I did. Despite being nothing more than a chunk of meat, frozen quite solid and unattached from any sort of connective system to supply outside oxygen or even the stimulation of a nervous system, the heart indeed continued to pump. Endlessly. Tirelessly. Without fail, without dying and without need for a host to facilitate its functionality. It really is quite a remarkable accomplishment, donât you think?âÂ
You valiantly swallow the bile rising in your throat. âItâs ⌠certainly impressive, sir. I wonât deny that. But â but what are you possibly going to do with something like this? F - for what purpose?âÂ
Frankly, you already had a few ideas and none of them were good.Â
Turning his head, the man sends you a rather biting look despite how unmoved his expression otherwise remains. âThat is another stupid question, isnât it? I thought I told you not to bore me with such â uninspired thinking.âÂ
He pivots to face you then and you instinctively recoil, pushing back against the chair youâre strapped to even when you know itâs a lost cause. Youâre suddenly out of your mind with animal self preservation though, frantic and wheezing, sniveling, as he comes up to stand at your hip. Even when his body language and demeanor continue to read perfectly cool and calm, your fight or flight still goes absolutely haywire to have you wildly tugging against your restraints.Â
âIâm sorry! Iâm sorry! Please donât hurt me, I swear I wonât tell anyone about any of this, please! I promise Iâll - -â
âOh, do stop that inane blubbering, wonât you? If I was going to harm you Iâve had ample opportunity to do so already, havenât I?âÂ
Panting so hard it makes you feel lightheaded, you force yourself to calm down enough to speak. He was right. He could have already hurt you in any number of ways had he so wanted, and he hadnât. Not yet.Â
But why?Â
âWha - ⌠w - what are you going to do with me then?â
He puts his head to one side, once again reminding you a little too much of the Doctor in that gesture.Â
âYet another stupid question after I already warned you once. Thatâs strike two. I would advise you to choose your words much more carefully from here on out, assistant.â
One of his hands reaches down then, not even giving you a word of warning before he pulls on some sort of lever on the side of the chair. All at once the whole thing jerks back with you in it, no longer locked in place, and you shriek a horrified sound at suddenly finding yourself looking up at the ceiling. That abrupt rush of vertigo comes very close to sending your stomach contents flying from your mouth but you grit your teeth, holding it back.Â
Still moving as sedately as ever, he then reaches above your head to push down on the top of the backrest, which lowers even further to eventually lock with a sharp, metallic click. Youâre flat on your back now, struggling to breathe around the choking panic, while he moves a little closer to stand by your shoulder.Â
Itâs only at that moment when, self consciously mindful of your skirt, you attempt to squeeze your thighs together only to find that theyâre stuck in the wide v heâd strapped you in, does it occur to you what sort of exam heâd likely meant.Â
âW - wait - -âÂ
âHush, now. This wonât hurt so long as you cooperate. Be a love for me, now.â Calmly bringing his hands together over your chest, he doesnât even hesitate to begin unbuttoning the front of your shirt with detached, clinical efficiency. You feel the first give way to loosen the fabric around your throat, and you quickly turn your face to the side with a nauseous groan.Â
âYou know,â he goes on, amicably enough. âIâve heard much about you. Omega thinks rather highly of you, in fact, and I suppose the old man must rather like you too if youâre still around. Judging by the confused look on your face, though, I take it that neither of them have told you about us yet?â Â
At the mute shake of your head, he snorts a quietly harsh laugh.Â
âThat doesnât surprise me. I seem to recall Omega warning us that we needed to keep ourselves hidden away unless we wanted to go back to taking care of that old fool ourselves. I suppose he feared we would scare you off.â Pausing when heâs half of the way down your front, he sends you an almost thoughtful look. âThis probably isnât helping that, is it?â
You press your lips into a warbling line and shake your head again, scared that speaking might further agitate his ire.Â
Without another thought to the matter, he seamlessly picks right back up where heâd left off, opening the front bodice of your uniform straight down to the waist where the apron was cinched and the flouncy skirt began. Then, coming back up, he parts the material and shoves it out to the sides to expose the silky slip underneath.Â
âNo matter. Itâs already too late for you, anyway. An entire month is a long time to find oneself embroiled in the matter of a Fatui Harbingerâs affairs. Even if you tried to escape the house right now, fleeing out into the wilderness alone, I very much doubt either of them would let you go that easily. However, with that being said, I have to admit to a certain curiosity where you are concerned.âÂ
Reaching into your open top, he slips one latex encased hand down the top of your slip to latch onto the left side of your chest. You outright seethe at the contact when his glove is faintly cold and impartial, and it finds more traction on your skin than a bare hand would have. Whimpering softly as he uses the other set of fingers to tug the chemise down, carefully pulling your breast out until it slips completely free a moment later. The nipple is already tightly coiled and stiff from the chilly air as much as the treatment, and you give a dazed shudder there on the chair when he switches to the other side to repeat the process.Â
âAlthough we all share much of the same tastes, naturally, it is rare for Omega to be so adamant about keeping us such a big secret. And in our own house at that.âÂ
He must see the way you twitch in response, sending you a slow look of consideration now.Â
âThatâs right, little assistant. We all lived here before you did, coming and going freely as our individual whims and research dictated, just as Iâm sure we will continue to do long after youâre gone. I can see youâre curious so I suppose Iâll give you this answer for free. As you might have already started to guess, Feofan gave this manor to his beloved old wretch so that he might conduct his research in peace and quiet, with limited interruptions all the way out here in the country. And of course that included us too. Weâre something of a package deal, if you want the truth.â
Turning his attention back to your restrained body, he brings two of his fingers close to deftly pinch the pebbled peak of one breast between the digits. No aplomb, no warning, no build up.Â
You jerk so hard the chair rattles underneath you, choking on a wholly undignified sound as he sets in to roll that sensitive bud between the two pads. The sharp rush of friction on your teat is only further highlighted by the latex, which seems to grip and pull at the flesh more than it should. And the thrill of it shoots straight down to your neglected core, making your earlier arousal come crashing back as if the floodgates had been released. You were starting to slick again, even when you desperately try to will yourself not to. Dammit.Â
âThese are sensitive.â He announces, with absolutely no inflection to indicate what his opinion on that might be. Â
Drawing in a slow, painfully clipped breath, you shyly flick your attention towards him and then away again when you find him closely watching your reaction. His gaze is so cold and impartial that you canât quite seem to wrap your head around what heâs doing to you, or why. Even as that steady hand ignites your nerves, setting you aflame, you fight it, begging yourself not to give him the satisfaction of seeing you squirm.Â
Itâs an entirely lost cause, though, and you quietly wheeze once he abandons the first teat, puffy and aching, sticking up off your body now in an almost painfully sharp point, so he can switch to the other. The jarring sensation of latex on your hitherto neglected nipple makes your back arch almost supplicatingly in the chair, whining a harried sound in the back of your throat.Â
This was bad. You were already thrumming for it even prior to this, and now âŚÂ
âO - oough!âÂ
âI see. Your receptivity is quite high to this sort of stimulation. It looks like youâre quite enjoying this.â
Tossing your head back against the chair, you make another futile attempt to turn away from him but his looming presence over you is utterly inescapable. Even when you give your arms another desperate wrench, trying to force the leather straps to loosen, all you succeed in doing is making your tits jostle and bounce. But the pinching hold heâs got on your teat is absolute and the resulting recoil makes the flesh pull to send another breath-stealing shockwave through your already sensitized system.Â
A slow, drawling chuckle slips out of him then, and you glance up in surprise at hearing that sound come from him even as you seethe another tortured noise through your teeth. The look on his face, somehow contrived and coldly amused at the same time, is enough to ice your veins over. And, yet, the fingers relentlessly plucking at your breast still keep you burning from the inside out, stoking your fire faster than you would have thought possible.Â
The contrast of it shocks you almost as much as the way his narrowed eyes do when they dance at you, clearly finding amusement in your unfortunate predicament. And so very, very red. They were just like the ones youâd seen last night, nearly identical, except ⌠this oneâs seem somehow sharper. Wiser. More mature?
Oh, why couldnât you have just stayed away from the cellar like you were told?Â
âIs this why those two are so partial towards you, then? I might have expected as much from Zandik, but he has always been a bit of a fool in his own way. Of course that goes for me too, but âŚâÂ
Pausing, the bespectacled man brings his other hand up and latches onto the first tit again, using both sets of fingers now to roll and twist the aching buds. Lightly tugging and tweaking, and squeezing them, gradually increasing the pressure until heâs doing it vigorously enough to register as hurt.Â
You go absolutely wild where youâre strapped down, heaving against your bindings and trying to twist away from him, but itâs utterly useless. He just follows you wherever you try to turn, relentless and merciless in equal measure.Â
And the worst part is how much your pussy absolutely floods in response, turning molten and drippy. Melting for him, even when you really wished it wouldnât.Â
âI almost would have expected better from Omega.â He goes on, still not sounding particularly moved by any of this. âHe is the prime, after all. So I would have thought heâd have better control over his urges than even me, and yet itâs looking as if I am truly the only one with any real objectivity here. What a pity.â
He suddenly releases you, just like that, to leave you woundedly lurching on the chair. Struggling to draw enough oxygen into your lungs, you slowly tip your face down to look over your own breasts where they obscenely spill out of your top. Full and heavy, the tips sticking up in flushed little points. Itâs nearly enough to send you over the edge right then and there.Â
The surgeon â you donât know what else to think of him as â turns from you then to pull open a drawer. You take that moment to finally peer around at your surroundings but nothing looks outwardly recognizable. Just a brick floor and brick walls lined with shelves and cupboards, a small desk, and a drawn curtain on one side. Were you even still in the cellar?Â
He silently turns back to you now, and you warily watch him unscrew a cap off of a small glass bottle which he then dips two of his fingers into. They come back goopy, smeared with some kind of semi clear liquid, and you immediately suck in a wheezing gasp when he then reaches for you again.Â
âWait - -âÂ
He does not wait, almost disinterestedly smearing the mystery substance over your left nipple with the same clinical efficiency you were beginning to expect from him. At first it just registers as almost painfully cold on the already sore teat, but then it quickly starts to warm up upon settling into your skin. Then a sharp, prickling sensation starts, almost burning, and you sob a nearly hysterical sound when he reaches across to do the same to the other side.Â
âStop it! What is that?âÂ
âItâs a topical ointment derived from mist flowers and menthol. Rather potent, isnât it? Since you seem to enjoy this sort of stimulation on your breasts so much, I thought you might appreciate it while I focus on other things.âÂ
Blinking through the sting of tears, you shoot him a pinched look of question.Â
But his only response is to send a slow, deliberately pointed glance down the length of your body, making you shudder hard enough to have your back molars aching.
âPlease donât ⌠oh, gods, please donât do it.âÂ
Without a single word, he turns from you, leaving you to hiccup sadly while he sets the little bottle aside on a wheeled tray down by your hip which you hadnât noticed before. Taking his time as if he had all day to toy with you like this â and for all you know he really might â before then nudging it further down past your line of sight. It sounds like he leaves it just within the circle of your spread legs before going back over to the row of drawers along the wall to rummage around again.Â
Itâs a real struggle to tear your eyes away from him, terrified of what he might come back with next, but you force yourself to fretfully glance down at your chest again. It doesnât exactly come as a surprise that you find your nipples fat and engorged where the mystery goop seemed to be making them swell with the constant, borderline painful stimulation. As if they were being lightly pricked a million times over even as they wetly glisten there under the glaring lights. Theyâre darkly flushed, too, and the sight of them like that seems to make something in you crack, letting out an oddly lilting wail of horror at what heâs done.Â
âPlease. Do be quiet, wonât you?â He says, shuffling back to stand over you once more. âSurely itâs not so bad as to warrant all this fuss, is it? The response to your nervous system will start to wear off in about ten minutes unless I apply more in that time, and there are no side effects to speak of either. I have to say, you are certainly easy to frighten.â A thoughtful pause, but it doesnât last very long and he seems to make up his mind in record time. âThen, if it will stop you from making that godawful noise again, Iâll share another piece of information that I believe you will find quite comforting.â
Pausing to give his glasses a quick adjustment, he impassively peers down at you for a long stretch of seconds as if to ensure he had your full attention and that you were listening. Even in your twitching misery, you canât help but think of him as arrogantly full of himself. Easily the worst personality youâve met so far in this place, and that was certainly saying something given the rest of the company you were keeping.Â
Evidently satisfied by your continued silence, save for the labored breaths that shudder out of you, he finally nods once to indicate his approval a drawn out moment later.Â
âVery well. Then I can give you my word that, at least for today, you are safe here with me. I will not kill you or maim you, nor will I inject you with any sort of experimental substances. This is because, my dear assistant, we still have use of you. It is imperative that Zandikâs care is seen to and none of us have the time or the patience for it. Iâm quite sure Omega explained this to you, did he not?âÂ
Your mouth pops open at that but not even a single sound comes out. He was talking about the Doctor?Â
The corners of his eyes turn up at the shocked expression on your face, as if he were smiling, but the surgical mask keeps the gesture thoroughly hidden from you prying eyes.Â
âYouâre starting to understand now. Good. Then, you see, I have no reason to jeopardize the current arrangement by disposing of you just yet, do I? Iâm merely curious, thatâs all. And once Iâm finished I will be happy to let you scamper off back to the old man so that you might resume your duties like a good little pet, still in one piece and unharmed. Relatively speaking, anyway.âÂ
He abruptly smacks something against the palm of his hand, emphasizing that last bit, to make you jump at the sound. Anxious and uncertain, you watch him wave whatever it is rather blithely in the air, as if he truly found this all to be so very dull.Â
âFrankly, dear, I would have been perfectly content to keep ignoring your presence upstairs as I have been. But since you decided to come snooping around down here, I simply see no reason as to why I should continue to hide. You really only have yourself to blame, you know. Now, open up nice and big for me.â
You outright jolt, wide eyes tracking the motion of the implement he holds out towards your face. Itâs only at the last possible second that you realize itâs a thermometer and you quickly press your lips into a tight line, turning your head away from it.Â
âOh dear ,â he clicks his tongue, following you with that poised hand to try again. âDo you really think itâs a good idea to make this any harder for yourself than it needs to be?âÂ
The cool glass tip just brushes your lips, prodding at your mouth, but you only squeal a muffled sound of protest and turn the other way. You had no idea where heâd had that thing or if it was even clean!Â
To your surprise, though, he retracts the thermometer after the second attempt and gives it another agitated little flick. âAlright. Have it your way.âÂ
He moves away from you then, down towards your feet, and you soon catch the sound of a soft little clink when he sets it down on the metal tray. You immediately let out a big, whooping breath of relief, panting to catch your breath.Â
That moment of respite is regrettably short lived, however, and you give a sudden jolt when you feel his hands come up to grab at the small bench seat just under your butt. Giving it a good wrench, the panel snaps down and locks in place to leave your panties utterly exposed in this position. You squeal a horrified sound and renew your earlier struggle against the restraints with mindless desperation to make the chair â or what was left of it â rattle again.Â
But even when you twist so hard it makes your arms and legs hurt, you get no further than you did before. And the surgeon is just as unmoved by your panicked writhing as before when he calmly reaches up to adjust the angle of the metal stirrups, one at a time, with a faint click, click, click of the inner mechanisms. Wheezing in terror at the way your knees are forced to accommodate a tighter bend now to point towards your chest, you lift your head up as far as you can manage to peer down the length of your own body.Â
Itâs difficult when you were laid out flat on your back though, and all youâre really able to see is the bespectacled man standing between the vulnerable spread of your legs, twisting a small component on the joint of the second stirrup to set it in place. With that done, he turns towards where the tray must be situated without even sparing you so much as a glance. A curious sound of metal scraping against metal filters through the air and then, to your gobsmacked horror, he holds up a shiny pair of scissors.Â
You tense up painfully stiff, bracing for the worst, as you screw your eyes shut so you wonât have to look. To your whimpering surprise, though, it is not the chill of steel that reaches out to touch your cunt but rather a sure and steady hand. A harsh gasp catches in your throat to nearly choke you on it even as you fitfully shudder against that dispassionate contact, squirming helplessly in response.Â
But he patently ignores your useless struggle while he traces the outline of your slit, those latex encased fingers spending a long, prolonged moment merely caressing over the length of you, up and down. Up and then back down. Only once your panties are plastered to the pudge of your labia does he then, on the next upward stroke of his wrist, tug at the underwear to pull it taut against you. He doesnât stop at the apex of your mound though, pulling the material tighter and tighter until itâs digging into delicate lips and you start to feel dizzy from the sharp friction.Â
You hiss a sensitive little sound at that, lifting your head again to look beyond the plump swell of your tits, the fat, throbbing nipples that dot them and beyond the soft curve of your belly to watch how he almost thoughtfully nudges your panties into an even tighter pull. From this angle youâre able to see down the front of them where heâs got the fabric pinched between thumb and forefinger, and you whine a low sound at the sight of ripe, fleshy cunt lips dimpling under the pressure.Â
âOh - oouuughhhn!â
âInteresting.â He murmurs, more to himself than to you. âI wasnât expecting you to respond positively to this as well. Yes. Yes, Iâm starting to get a better picture now.âÂ
He lifts the scissors then, slipping the sharp blades over the fabric above your hip from bottom to top. With one clean slice, that side of your underwear falls loose, and then he repeats the process on the other. With nothing left to hold them together anymore, he slowly starts to peel them back to expose your heated pussy to the cool air, making you twitch at the dull realization of how very wet and puffy you actually are.Â
So thoroughly soaked, in fact, that your cunt stickily tries to cling to your panties as the gusset is ever so slowly eased away in excruciating slow motion. You clench your teeth to try and stopper any of the highly embarrassing sounds that might try to slip out, but itâs just too much. Between the second heartbeat in your cunt, reflected twice over between both of your aching nipples, you can feel yourself slipping into a heady, intoxicating daze.Â
If only Master Zandik or even Lord Regrator had just reached down and played with your pussy in the drawing room earlier, maybe you wouldnât have been in such a wretched state now.Â
Itâs much too late for that, however, and a surprised little groan punches out of your mouth when the surgeon comes back up to casually cup the palm of one hand over your swollen cunt. He takes a moment to just squeeze at you, pinching the labia and making them squish together in a terribly wet press, smearing arousal with his glove, before retracting his hand again.Â
But itâs quickly replaced by a seeking digit which slips between the pudgy seams with shameful ease, to take a slow, slippery swipe up the length of your slit. You tremble fiercely at the touch, trying your best to block it out, to pretend like itâs not happening. And yet when he reaches the top and then presses into you with two fingers, stretching the digits wide to pull you open and bear to him the velvety inner petals dripping in eager dew, you canât seem to stop the frazzled little mewl that slips out.Â
âHm. Already this excited, are you? I take it that means youâre either secretly enjoying this quite a bit more than your facial expressions would seem to suggest, or ⌠is it that you had one of them helping themselves to this sweet little cunt before you came down here? Well? Which is it, dear assistant?âÂ
He punctuates this question by slowly closing his fingers and then rubbing over your clit with them in tortuously sedate, coaxing circles. The glide is made mind numbingly smooth by the excess of arousal as much as the latex of his glove and you suck in a ragged gasp, juddering faintly under his attention even as you try yet again to yank at the restraints around your wrists.Â
âIâm waiting.â He all but purrs, the sound dangerous more than it is sultry when it was coming from him.Â
âN - no. Neither. I â oh, gods â I donât like this, and ⌠nnghn! I didnât ⌠I didnât get to - -â
âAh!â He cuts you off with that harsh bark, as if he has just struck upon an interesting breakthrough. âSo, thatâs what it is. You were left waiting and wanting, werenât you? Oh, but dear assistant, you should have said something much sooner. I would have been happy to help you with that.âÂ
The way he proceeds to trail off into a rumbling, vaguely ominous chuckle does not make you feel particularly good about where this is going. Even after heâd said he wouldnât kill you, that he still had use for you, there really was no telling what he might choose to do that would still technically fall under the definition of leaving you âunharmed and in one pieceâ.Â
And you simply donât get the chance to puzzle out how you should appeal to him intelligently before he withdraws his fingers from your vibrating quim in favor of landing a hard swat to one side of your defenseless ass.Â
Swat!
âBut first, your temperature.â He announces, skimming right over the startled squawk you give at that heavy handed slap and almost successfully distracting you from the resulting sting.Â
Your temperature? He hadnât given up on that after all?
It takes a great deal of self control on your part not to full on sob as you weakly lift your head again, hoping to see what heâs doing, but this, too, is no use. Your position is completely prone like that and you canât make out much of anything other than the fact he appears to be fiddling with something. Having no other choice and powerless to stop any of it, you let your neck roll back with a defeated groan.Â
A moment later the surgeon shuffles back up into the space between your legs where he rather unceremoniously swipes a goop covered finger over the pucker of your asshole, quite without warning or even much care for the task from what you can tell. And you jolt so hard you would have easily come straight up off the chair-turned-table if you werenât strapped down. It comes as such a great shock, both physically and mentally, in fact, that for a horrible stretch of seconds you canât even make any sense of whatâs happening.Â
But then you feel him shift, bringing his hand close again, and something smooth presses right in on the center wrinkle of your back entrance. Itâs so smooth and so petite that the tight ring of muscle puts up little to no resistance at all, and it slides right past that external barrier to wedge inside your ass.Â
Dizzy and nauseous from the sharp little searing sting of being penetrated like that, you unsteadily lurch in place there on your back while your guts quiver and shudderingly contract around it.Â
âEh - aaugghhhh, please! No more ⌠take it out!âÂ
âAh, ah. Keep it in, now, darling. I will not be pleased with you if I have to reinsert it for you. Thatâs right. Clench down. Good girl.âÂ
Itâs exceedingly difficult to do when that substance heâd coated you in first was so very slippery but you force your body to cooperate, to tighten the muscles and hold that slim thermometer in your ass while he turns away to step back over to the row of drawers along the wall. At least it was not the same ointment that heâd put on your nipples, you think, sniffling rather sadly as you turn your head against the chair to watch his back. In that sense things really could have been much, much worse.Â
A brief moment passes and, flexing your fingers nervously against the armrests, you watch him turn with some sort of metal contraption in hand now, but you canât even begin to guess what it might be. Youâve never seen anything like it before, but you got the sense it was nothing good. Unfortunately youâre completely at his mercy and all you can truly do is whimper a frightened sound when he slips between your legs again.Â
He seems to set the implement aside on the little tray, though, instead taking his finger and lightly nudging at the exterior end of the thermometer to make it wriggle around inside you.Â
âAlmost there, assistant.â He says over the threadbare moan you let out. âYouâre trying awfully hard to be good for me now, arenât you?âÂ
âAhh ⌠y - yes.âÂ
Snorting a quiet sound, he curls one gloved finger just a pinch lower to feel along the faintly raised rim of your asshole, paying extra close attention to the meaty little pucker formed around the stem of the instrument. You canât stop yourself from shaking wildly at the sensation, unused to having something wedging your ass open like that, no matter how petite it may be, and even less used to being touched there. It feels wrong and dirty, somehow even more disgraceful than everything else youâve experienced up until now.Â
And yet, despite it all â the deep felt pang of humiliation, the embarrassment, the terror and the regret for what you were becoming â your pussy just continues to drool excessively for him. So, so hungry for attention that any would do, apparently.Â
He makes a quiet tutting sound then, almost as if he were cooing at you as he starts to slowly ease the thermometer out. Much slower than was necessary, to ensure you can feel the drag along your guts and the way your fleshy, lubed up pucker desperately tries to cling to the shaft while itâs gradually being taken away. A keening noise suddenly rises in the air and a split second later you realize youâre the one making that sound.Â
Finally, the end pops free to leave your asshole loosely puffed up after it, but heâs quick to replace the instrument with the tip of one finger, stiltedly pushing it inside to fill you back up. Itâs a nearly seamless transition and that untested ring of muscle doesnât even have a chance to fully close again before heâs sliding right through on another slow searing stretch.Â
You writhe helplessly against your bonds, shoving your heels into the footwells on the stirrups in a desperate bid to escape that seeking, unrelenting pressure to no avail. His long digit is just suddenly wedged inside of you, plugging you, and when you haltingly bring your head up again youâre nearly shocked to find he isnât even giving you his full attention right now.
The brunt of his focus is on the thermometer reading, which he makes a vague hum at before giving it another quick flick in his hand before setting it aside. He swivels his gaze back around to the spot between your legs, then, placing his other hand over your mound in a curled, almost possessive gesture, so he can lightly brush that deft thumb against your clit.Â
âNn - nnghnn! Pl - please! Oooughh âŚâÂ
âPlease, what?âÂ
You hiccup miserably even as your hips twitch up into the contact, entirely against your will. âWh - ⌠wannaâ cum.âÂ
Another slow, grating chuckle. âDo you, now?âÂ
A naive little flutter of hope starts up in your chest, against all your better sense and logic, but that fleeting tendril is soon quashed when he pulls his hand back. At the same time that finger in your ass gradually starts to retreat, once again making sure you feel the drag, the internal clench when your guts instinctively cling to it on the way out. The searing burn of penetration. It has you choking on a disappointed little sob when he slips free of you, the salt of bitter tears gathering in the corners of your eyes to wet your lashes.Â
If he would just let you cum already you could think so much clearer âŚ
That does not seem to be his priority right now, though, despite what heâd said to suggest otherwise, and you give a full bodied twitch when you feel him switch his hands around. The one that had just been fingering your asshole open now comes to lightly rest across your lower belly, giving the soft crease there a vague squeeze when it settles. The other set of fingers find your weeping slit and push in just enough to slip between the meaty press where he proceeds to take his time casually drawing them up and down, up and down through the slick mess.Â
Your pussy feels so much like warm, melty honey that you can only supplicatingly shake for him, tense and halting, and so utterly helpless in your bondage. You barely even feel like a real person anymore as you lie there, forced into an unseemly spread, while he caresses over the fleshy grip of your labia in such a way that only makes you that much more desperate for release. Itâs as if your consciousness is receding again, fading down to nothing more than a fine, pulsing pinprick of sensation that begins and ends in your cunt. Like that was all you were now. A set of hot, drippy holes and nothing else.Â
If his goal was to dehumanize you, he was certainly succeeding in that endeavor.Â
But then, on the next downward swipe when his first two digits pass over your eager entrance, he starts to push in instead of completing the full motion again. You jerk at the sudden invasion, feet braced against the stirrups as hard as you can in another failed attempt to scuttle away from that invading hand. Youâre much too wet though, too primed and ready, waiting and wanting, and he slides up into you with a truly embarrassing lack of resistance. Straight to the knuckles where heâs forced to halt by simple virtue of having no further to go.Â
âThereâs a good pet.â Heâs cooing at you over the sound of your breathless, wounded gasps. âJust relax for me and it will all be over soon. Thatâs it. My, youâre certainly tight, arenât you?âÂ
Slow blinking in a disoriented haze, you mewl a needy little sound up at the ceiling but heâs no more moved by this wordless plea than he is by anything else. He just leaves those gloved fingers wedged within you, still and incomprehensibly heavy, for the time being while he curls his thumb up to brush over your clit. Itâs only when you feel the resulting, fleshy nudge do you fully comprehend exactly how spread open you are like this. He could see everything. Every last little part of you that even you had never glimpsed before.Â
And trying to reject it does you absolutely no good, exhaling a stilted, shuddering sigh when your cunt reluctantly starts to warm up to his ministrations. Your inner sleeve pulses around the intrusion, clit tingling warmly, buzzing, under his thumb, even when the gesture seems to lack much finesse. Heâs just stimulating your body in the way biology would dictate it should be stimulated, knowing what would net results and what wouldnât without much care for anything beyond that.Â
But then why did it feel so overwhelmingly good if his touch was this impartial, this clinical? Was your pussy really that easy to please, willing to respond to anyone and anything if they just gave it the attention it so desperately wanted?Â
You wildly toss your head against the backrest as if in outright rejection to that horrifying thought. âGods! No, nooooo ⌠p - pleeeeaaase!âÂ
âHush, dear assistant. Hush. Your exam is almost complete.âÂ
At that the hand laying across your belly adjusts its positioning, the whole length from palm to fingertips nearly spanning from one hip to the other. Then he pushes down, firm and slow. The pressure that bears down on your internal organs has you stuttering a quiet sound of alarm, writhing stiffly when it seems to compress your womb. It forces your already palpitating cunt into an even tighter squeeze around his fingers to make them feel somehow even bigger within you, weighty and so very, very hot.Â
And with those fingers lodged deep in your guts, he starts to prod upward. Feeling along your upper wall with a perfectly casual motion to â do what, you canât even begin to guess. You have no real understanding of what this is supposed to accomplish, but you are painfully aware of the moment he nudges against something that makes the thrumming tension in you swell to a truly incomprehensible degree.Â
It's like static electricity zapping from one nerve ending to the next to set them all alight, in the span of a single heartbeat. Buzzing, vibrating, it steals your breath away, leaving you gaping like a beached fish on your back, but he only offers another one of those low, drawling chuckles in response.Â
âYou arenât supposed to enjoy this part, you know. Ah, but my darling little assistant seems to have quite an insatiable, greedy cunt, doesnât she? Hmmmm.â Pausing to exhale a somewhat wistful breath, he rubs his fingers over that spot again with an increasing sense of demand while his thumb continues to stay busy at your clit. âI suppose I canât really hold it against you though. I have good reason to suspect why those two find you so very fascinating, after all, and I canât say Iâm not in agreement with them on that. You are very fun to toy with, Iâll give you this much. The way you canât seem to hide your reactions coupled with this overwhelming sensitivity make for a rather interesting experiment indeed. I do wonder though ⌠if you even enjoy receiving your pelvic exam, of all things, then what wonât you like?âÂ
You flinch as if heâd reached out and struck you with his hand, but you canât seem to find your voice now. Itâs lost somewhere in the heaving, painfully clipped breaths that wrack through your trembling frame, making your tits shudder with each labored gasp. The sensation is very different from how it felt when Zandik was the one playing with you, when he focused so much of his keen attention on your receptive clit, but you were still fairly certain you were about to cum. If he just kept rubbing you like that a little longer, if he would just continue to nudge his thumb over that throbbing bundle of nerves for another moment or two, you would finally tip over the edge. You were sure of it.Â
His behavior up tilâ now makes you unwilling to trust it though, and you half expect him to yank the source of your stimulation away with a cruel, condescending laugh. You even brace for it, expecting it to come at any moment now.Â
But that is not what happens. Even when you quake and stretch out along the backrest as much as your restraints will allow, arching your spine so enthusiastically it hurts, he just keeps rubbing, brushing, curling in a come hither motion that has you swelling for him. Your stomach hurts from how dramatically it flexes, torn between either sucking in a much needed lungful of oxygen or angling down into that constant, continuous, mind melting rush of sensation. His first and middle finger, his thumb, the weight of his palm across your belly, the clinging drag of latex on soft, sensitive flesh, the grip of your guts on him, the swollen nudge of flesh. The noise coming from between your legs is by far the worst of it though. That thick, sloppy schluck, schluck, schluck, schluck â Â
Every single inch of your body suddenly locks up, stiff as a board and quaking uncontrollably.
âOouuughhhhhn!â You full on wail, stiffly thrashing at your bondage now. âOoughn! Iâm â I - I ⌠mâgonna - -âÂ
âThen do it. Now.âÂ
That sharp bark of command, so much like the Doctorâs, seems to shock it out of you and you go ramrod stiff, the chair rattling underneath your sweat coated body from how violently you devolve into a fit of spasms. Your pussy flutters wildly around his probing digits, contracting and squeezing, pulsing with a heartbeat all its own.Â
And somewhere in the squealing throes of your delight the floodgates seem to come down, because your cunt positively erupts all over his wrist and forearm. You see the spray of liquid arousal at the edge of your periphery almost as much as you hear it in tiny little splatters against the floor underneath you, although your quim is much too busy pulsing for you to truly feel it coming out. But a fresh wave of horror instantly grips you even while youâre still cumming, while your inner sleeve still works to positively strangle his fingers, and you snap your head up with a wheezing gasp.Â
Standing between the spread of your legs, the surgeon just impassively peers down at you, watching the flagrant animal display in your release. His hand is still moving within you no matter how tight your constricting walls clench around him, still jabbing upward with malicious precision. And you watch in total disbelief as another healthy squirt of fluid sprays out of you to pitter patter against his white outer coat, leaving behind tiny wet spots in its wake.Â
âNuh - noooooo, oh god! No no nononononooooooh!â Â
Your head thunks back against the chair while you continue to twist and writhe, the orgasm hardly even coming as a relief when he wonât give you the chance to truly bask in it. His keen fingers just seem to drag it out well past the point of comfort, encouraging your pussy to keep throbbing until you almost canât stand it anymore. It leaves you oversensitized and overstimulated, all but sobbing when it quickly becomes much too much.Â
Until finally, an eternity later, those digits grow still within you and just sit there, feeling the way you thrum around him, although his thumb doesnât cease itâs almost thoughtful nudge at your clit even then. You continue to twitch and judder, instinctively trying to shy away from it, but thereâs no escaping him. Not like this. All you can do is endure and pray it will be over soon.Â
He seems to have other plans though, and he slowly slips his fingers out to the sound of another thick, sticky slurp that still somehow manages to embarrass you despite everything else, grimacing at the noise. Giving your stomach a rather pleased pat with the other hand, he then turns away to fiddle with something on the metal tray at his side while you struggle to catch your breath. But youâre well and truly exhausted by this point, unable to do anything except lie there when he at last turns back to you a moment later.Â
You try to nudge your chin down to see what heâs doing now but the angle is wrong, and you no longer seem to have the energy needed to lift your head. Left to listlessly squirm in your restraints, you make a very valiant attempt to ignore him, to come the rest of the way down from your nauseating high. Youâd gotten the orgasm you had so desperately wanted so now you should be able to think a little more clearly ⌠right?Â
That does not appear to be the case, however, and you canât help the way you suck in a startled breath at the abrupt sensation of his fingers on your cunt again. Utterly clinical now, he presses two digits into the pudge on either side of your labia and presses, forcing them to spread apart for him. Then something slips between the parted folds to find your entrance where it slowly yet firmly starts to slide in, thin at first but gradually tapered to widen out the more of it he feeds into you. Cold, and far too solid to be his hand â or any part of his body for that matter.Â
In a distant, vague sort of way you realize heâs inserting some kind of steel implement into your cunt and you squeak a harried sound, jolting in place. It just keeps coming though, deeper and deeper, stuffing your inner sleeve full until, at last, the exterior of it settles against fleshy lips. He shifts slightly in the space between your legs and seems to bring both hands together. A nudge at the contraption and a near silent crank of an inner mechanism follows, and your mouth promptly drops open in shock when the narrow shaft inside you slowly starts to widen.Â
Your already frazzled and overloaded mind struggles with this information, almost as much as your pussy struggles to accommodate the stretch youâre forced you to endure. But that cold, unfeeling metal is completely merciless, uncompromising in its demands of your body, and you let out a quiet sound of hurt when it proceeds to wedge you wide open in a gaping spread.Â
Fidgeting with something that you can only assume locks the implement in place, the bespectacled man then straightens up and reaches high overhead for the glaring bright light that hangs from the ceiling. He gives it a good yank to adjust its angle, abruptly washing your lower half in a faint rush of warmth before bending down to get a better look at you while you just whimper and whine, pitifully sniveling in your disoriented stupor.Â
âMessy little girl.â He murmurs, barely even heard over your own frantic breathing.Â
And your vibrating panic only continues to ratchet up another notch when he reaches into you with one finger to feel along your quivering insides. The sensation is all wrong, like you were being inspected as cattle might and any comfort or pleasure you might derive from that was only a mere byproduct. Perhaps even an unintended consequence. He didnât actually care about how much you enjoyed or hated this experience, only that he was able to glean interesting results in the process.Â
Youâre not sure how long he spends just touching you like that. Without any intention of bringing you pleasure but only a single minded pursuit for picking out what makes you tick, especially when every second feels like hours and every minute felt like whole lifetimes. But, eventually, he finally pulls back, returning to that wretched little tray again.Â
âPlease ⌠no more.â You croak, head lolling bonelessly on the table. âNo more. Please. I ⌠I want to go home.âÂ
The surgeon snorts an entirely mirthless laugh at that. âDonât be silly, dear assistant. Youâre already âhomeâ and you wonât be going anywhere else for the foreseeable future. That much, at least, I can promise you.âÂ
Leaving you to gape wide around the unbudging instrument in your cunt, he huddles close and you abruptly feel his fingertips brush over the pucker of your asshole again. Theyâre slick with a fresh dollop of goop, which he proceeds to lightly smear over the exterior of your back entrance even while you beg him not to do it. He doesnât listen, of course, and you soon find yourself seething a vicious hiss when he starts to push in again, breaching that tight ring of muscle one tortuous, slow moving centimeter at a time.Â
âEh - eeeyaaaaghh! Stop it, stop it! Please, I ⌠oooughnn, I donât like it!âÂ
âOh, Iâm not so sure I believe that, darling dear. Look at how well youâre already taking me, and I barely even had to work for it.âÂ
He chuckles a cruel sound just as his finger finishes sliding home, straight up to the knuckle, to leave you woundedly lurching, gasping for air. Try as you might to shove against the stirrups or to yank at your wrists, your range of movement is so terribly limited like this that thereâs just no way for you to escape it.Â
And with your legs propped up in the air like that, his finger stuffed in your ass and your pussy wide open, tits spilling out of your shirt, something within you seems to crack. The tears are streaking down your face in a sudden rush as you wail, crying out for Zandik to come save you. You wanted nothing more than to return to his side, to have him pet and praise you, to meet you on somewhat equal footing, not â this, whatever this inhumane treatment even was.Â
The man between your legs doesnât seem to appreciate it much though, clicking his tongue in clear annoyance now. âHe isnât going to be able to help you all the way down here, Iâm afraid. But I suppose that does tell me who your favorite is. Really, now, even Omega wasnât able to charm you more than that old fool? I canât imagine that bodes very well for the rest of us.â
Sniffing rather disdainfully, he starts to ease his hand back until only the tip of that finger remains sunk inside your ass. Then he pushes back in, right up to the knuckle, settling into a steady paced pumping motion to fuck you with it. And your groaning alarm only turns more dire when, once heâs satisfied with how much the tight passage has opened for him, he begins to pull all the way out to leave your pucker loosely clenched just so he can penetrate it again. It leaves behind a burning, throbbing ache in your sphincter which weakly clenches around the intrusion, gripping and clinging on a glide made utterly smooth thanks to the sticky lubricant as much as the latex of his glove.
You absolutely hate how much it has your pussy thrumming with reluctantly renewed interest. Itâs especially agonizing when youâre unable to squeeze down or feel the inner pulse of your own arousal, left with no other choice but to uselessly slick for him. Open and waiting, but so regretfully empty.Â
âThereâs a good girl,â he coos once the overwhelmed, gasping sobs have started to subside, replaced by stuttering moans. âThatâs much better, isnât it? You like having your ass played with, donât you?âÂ
âN - noooo âŚâ
He noises a soft sound of doubt, humming rather pointedly, as he sends a slow look down your open cunt. âIâm not so sure I believe that either. But it matters not. Youâre going to cum for me again, dear assistant, and youâre going to thank me while you do it. Are those instructions clear enough for you?âÂ
Youâre already shaking your head, rejecting that directive outright, but he clearly doesnât care whether or not you want to do it.Â
Still fucking into your ass with the one hand, he reaches up with the other to find your clit with his thumb again. You immediately jolt as if heâd just electrocuted you, whining a deeply frazzled sound as you try in vain to swivel your hips away from that indifferent touch. Ever unperturbed by your protests, he simply follows after you to continue rubbing that overworked, throbbing pearl even when you whimper in dire distress.Â
âThere. Isnât that nice?â He croons in a rather droll tone of voice. âYou really should be thankful, you know. This is the sort of service you arenât likely to get anywhere else. Not from any of the others. You must remember to thank me when you cum, assistant, or I will not be pleased with you.âÂ
You briefly consider telling him exactly where he can shove his thanks but you donât quite have the oxygen for that right now, and the thought is gone almost as soon as it appeared. Your body is far too busy rebelling against you to do much else but shake as your shuddering arousal rapidly starts to swell again. It seems to defy all logic and reason, and yet the simmering tension in your loins had not been in any way appeased by the first explosive release that had so tortuously rode the line between pleasure and pain. Youâre not convinced this one will be any different when he was the one coaxing it out of you, but thereâs nothing you can do to stop it.Â
Especially not when he slips his finger out of your ass, hovers there for a drawn out moment, and then pushes back in with two this time. The extra stretch to your passage has you helplessly bucking, which only nudges your cunt up into his hand. Itâs an insidious cycle that seems to feed off of and into itself, driving you ever closer to the edge of madness the longer it goes on.Â
And it doesnât take long at all for your eyes to start rolling back while he relentlessly attacks you from both ends. Your clit positively aches where it rolls under the pad of his thumb and your ass gives an occasional, bone deep throb where heâs got it stretched around his digits, burning at the thick stretch. Unable to close either of your holes, forced to keep them both open and wide, drives you inexorably out of your mind. But youâre too sore, too overtaxed to cum, even when you desperately will yourself just to do it and get it over with. You just canât.Â
âOoh, whatâs wrong, little dear? Do you need more ointment on your pretty tits to help you along?âÂ
You give a disoriented shake of your head, panting much too hard to verbally respond, but you donât really need to. He was just going to continue to do whatever he wants, regardless of what you had to say about it anyway.Â
Chuckling a brief laugh, he abandons your clit to leave it pulsing in the aftermath, pounding with a heartbeat all its own, so he can stretch his arm up between your legs. You can see what heâs doing, what heâs aiming for, and you squeak a frantic, wheezing protest but itâs too late.Â
Finding one of your nipples, he catches it between thumb and forefinger, giving it a sharp, pinching tug that nearly makes your soul vacate your body.Â
You squeal a hoarse, overwrought sound, back bowing violently and only increasing the sting on your tit twice over when you pull against his hand. All at once you suddenly find yourself cumming again. It doesnât just wash over you but slams full force, wracking you straight down to the bone while you shudder and shake, wailing a mindless shriek into the still air.Â
âSay it.â He growls, giving the captured teat a punishing twist.Â
âThank you!â You blurt, practically screaming it at the top of your lungs. âThank you, sir, thank you! Iâm so â so grateful to cum aga - aaaahhhhn!âÂ
Your tongue refuses to cooperate any further, lolling uselessly in your mouth while you spasm wildly through the throes of release. It feels somehow hollow despite the sheer intensity of it, though, as if in not being able to squeeze your cunt you were only experiencing a measly little third of the pleasure. In fact, you seem to feel it in your ass more than anything, that deep, deep, pounding clench of muscle that positively steals your breath away, trying to milk his fingers of something they simply didnât have to give.Â
This orgasm feels like it lasts even longer than the last as a result, the overtaxed muscles almost unable to stop spasming, contracting. It absolutely shreds you to pieces in the process, leaving your mind fragmented and shattered when you finally start to slip back into your body an eternity later. You donât even really feel like you anymore while you lay there, raggedly gasping for air, and so very far removed from yourself that you almost donât notice him finally moving to slip his fingers out of your loosened ass.Â
Itâs only when you realize heâs fumbling with the implement in your cunt do you snap out of it enough to stir, heaving a very frazzled groan. Dazed. Confused. Disoriented. Youâre not even entirely sure where you are anymore.Â
But the contraption easing its unforgiving grip on your twitching inner walls manages to catch your attention, and you whimper a quiet sound of relief when he begins to carefully pull it out. He leaves behind a mess of arousal, thick and goopy, sticky, that makes you feel deeply uncomfortable when youâre at last able to close again, raw and sore in the wake of his attentions.Â
Gently, he sets the steel equipment aside on the tray and then turns back to peer down at you. Sweating and heaving, flushed, stretched out on your back as much as the restraints will allow ⌠much too exhausted and spent to show any amount of shyness for your exposed body parts.Â
Even in your dozing stupor youâre aware of the little thread of tension that seems to shoot through his thin frame, the way he holds himself just a bit straighter. Rigid, almost.Â
Youâre already groaning a despairing sound when he starts to reach for the clasps on his white surgeon's coat, his posture clearly eager now. The thought of what he was going to do to you next nearly sends you into a spiraling pit of anguish even as you desperately try to fortify yourself and brace for it. If you could just hold out for a little bit longer, surely he would start to tire himself out.Â
âYes, I think I understand quite well what they like about you so much now. Youâre a sweet little thing, arenât you? Would you like to have a taste my cock as a reward, my darling assistant?âÂ
âStop.âÂ
Both of you startle, you more so than him, and you snap your head to the side just in time to watch the Doctor slip through the dark curtain. His body language is perfectly calm and casual, as though he had merely been passing through the neighborhood and decided to stop in to say a friendly hello. If you had been standing at that moment you would have crumpled right onto your ass from the shock of it.Â
âSo, this is where you scampered off to. Not a very smart decision, if you ask me.â He drawls, smirking under the hooked beak of his mask as he slowly saunters across the small room. Utterly laidback and unhurried. Not the least bit shocked or appalled by your current predicament, you canât help but notice.Â
âItâs not really my place to scold you, I admit, but Iâm afraid I must advise you to exercise better caution in the future. There are any number of potentially dangerous devices, potentially dangerous experiments and potentially dangerous ⌠persons you could have encountered down here, little mouse. And that is to say absolutely nothing of the consequences that could have befallen you if youâd actually broken something important.âÂ
Coming to a halt just at your hip, he keeps his arms neatly folded behind his back for the moment and just tips his head to one side. That curious carrion bird gesture again.Â
âBut,â the Doctor goes on smoothly. âI am glad to see my counterpart found you and has been taking very good care of you from the looks of it. Even though I do not think it was quite yet time to introduce you to them, I suppose whatâs done is already done. Well, then, darling. Tell me. Did you have fun on your little playdate today? Was the excursion worth the risk?â Â
You just stare up at him in plain faced disbelief for a long, uncomfortable stretch of seconds, desperately struggling to make any sense of what your overtaxed brain is trying to tell you. And whatâs been bothering you this entire time finally clicks into place with a sudden jolt.Â
Now that you have the two voices to compare, youâre struck by how very alike they sound. No. No, thatâs not quite it. They were identical, in fact, from the cadence to the register right down to that arrogant, self assured drawl. The only real difference you could make out between them was that the surgeon sounded a bit younger, his tone clearer, whereas the Doctorâs had a faint rumble to it, like that of a full grown man. Someone who has stopped filling out and reached the pinnacle of his life, physically as much as in his mental capabilities.Â
âOmega is the prime, after all.âÂ
Ever so slowly, your eyes widen to the approximate size of dinner plates. âYou ⌠youâre the same person.âÂ
âVery good.â The Doctor croons at you, as if he were speaking to someone with the intelligence of a toddler. âAnd now can you guess who the original is? Hm? Iâll even give you three chances to take a stab at it.â
Your shellshocked brain stumbles over the answer, almost refusing to accept the simplicity of it when it seemed so far removed from reality, but you know it must be true. Some small part of you had even started to suspect it on some level.Â
And it was impossible not to when they all had that same wispy shade of blue in their hair, the same wave and, you could only presume, the same red eyes. It wasnât just that they were similar in the way a parent and a child share certain features or characteristics between them. They were the same, only ⌠younger and older? A â a man at different stages of his life?Â
A nearly hysterical, oddly pitched moan bubbles out of your tight chest as you stare up into that featureless mask. You couldnât believe it.Â
âY - youâre ⌠Zandik ⌠when he was younger. Arenât you?âÂ
The surgeon snorts a quiet laugh, almost as if to say âit took you long enough to figure that outâ, moving now to impatiently start undoing the straps at one of your ankles while the Doctor chuckles a rather condescending sound.Â
âThatâs right, my poor, unassuming little mouse. Bully for you. I know very well just how difficult it can be to reach the right conclusion when your only point of reference is between Zandik and I. Weâre similar enough to draw certain suspicions, perhaps, but not enough to give up the game too quickly. And yet, when you start comparing the younger segments with each other?â He clicks his tongue, tut tutting as he gives his head a slow shake. âIt becomes obvious much too fast, doesnât it? Thatâs why I strongly suggested that they stay hidden and out of sight, at least for the time being.â
That last bit had been directed at the bespectacled man who, glancing up from the task of unfastening you from the stirrups, knits his brows in a grumpy frown. âYou canât put the blame on me for that. I didnât do anything out of the ordinary. She made the decision to come down here all on her own.â
His haughty grin slipping slightly, the Doctor swivels his attention back around towards you. âIs that true, little mouse? Did you decide to go snooping where you werenât welcome? I know for a fact that you were expressly prohibited from venturing outside of where you have already been permitted to be. And the cellar was not one of those places.âÂ
âI âŚâÂ
Trembling fitfully there on the table, you shoot a nervous glance between the two of them. But the one in the surgeon's mask appears to be resigned to the fact that his fun with you was over, at least for today, and Dottore ⌠you just couldnât wrap your head around it. For him to be this closely related to Zandik, even closer than that of a father and a son, seems like a true impossibility. Even when you can see the similarities in them, the mirrored mannerisms and speech â which you most certainly do â it still seems to defy all logic and reason. How were you possibly supposed to reconcile any of this in your mind, let alone come to terms with it and make peace in time to save your own hide? You had to think fast.Â
âI - I am sorry, my - my lord. It was not my intention to disobey you or Master Zandik, but ⌠but I saw someone, sir. Someone unknown to me. A stranger. And I was worried that they had snuck into the house without my noticing, that they might pose a danger to the Master. Thatâs why âŚâ
âWho?â He demands, his tone a sharp, chilling whip.Â
âI - I donât know. It wasnât him.â You stammer, indicating the surgeon with a nudge of your chin. âIt hadnât even occurred to me that there might be more than one before I came down here. Honest. I swear. The person I saw had ⌠he had a mask that was different from yours. His had cut outs for the eyes. Thatâs who I was expecting to find in the basement level. Not all of â this.âÂ
The Doctor hums a thin sound of annoyance, staring down at you in consideration as if he were weighing out the veracity of your story. He seems doubtful at first, and understandably so, but something youâd said must have rang true enough for him to buy it, because at length he scoffs and glances away.Â
âThat damned impulsive bastard.âÂ
âHe was just here earlier.â The bespectacled man chimes in then, working on the last strap around your left wrist now. âHe said he had something to take care of elsewhere but I didnât bother to ask for any other details. Frankly, I donât really care.â
Swinging his attention back around, the Doctor curls his mouth into another vague smirk, but itâs somehow tighter than the last. âNo matter. The damage is already done so all we can do now is move forward. And you. Little mouse. Now that you know the truth of the matter, how will you choose to proceed from here? Will you continue to see to your duties or shall I arrange for a carriage to transport you back to the city? And I suggest you decide fast.âÂ
You shudder at being addressed by him as much as the question he poses. A very real part of you almost jumps at the chance to escape this place, to return home and wipe your hands of all matters concerning any Fatui Harbingers from here on out. Youâd already suffered enough at their whims, certainly. And yet âŚÂ
Some innate sense or intuitive understanding tells you that this is another trap, another snare heâs laying down to see what he might catch this time. Another mouse? Or something bigger? Even though it had not sounded like a threat, thatâs very much how you interpret it, especially when you remember what the surgeon had said not that long ago at the start of this ordeal.Â
âEven if you tried to escape the house right now, fleeing out into the wilderness alone, I very much doubt either of them would let you go that easily. â
He was right. You were in much too deep to be able to leave, to just waltz right out of here and return to your old way of life. Not when you knew so much of their comings and goings, their secrets. Theyâd sooner kill you than let you go free now, of that you were quite sure. And even if your own life were not at risk, your mother ⌠youâd never be able to pay for her care another way. This was your one and only choice. Dammit.Â
Swallowing so hard you nearly gag, you force yourself to speak the words even when bile rises in the back of your parched throat while youâre forming them on your tongue.Â
âThat wonât be necessary, my lord. Iâd prefer to stay here and â and continue to care for Master Zandik ⌠i - if thatâs alright.â
The way his smile broadens, turning into a real grin now, assures you youâve made the choice that would keep you alive and breathing for another day. At least one, at the rate you were going, and you got the sense that was really all you could ask for at this point.
âWhy, of course it is. Donât be silly. In fact, I was so hoping that would be your answer. It really would be such a pity to have to see you leaving so soon, you know. Maids can be surprisingly hard to find in this day and age. And with that decided, letâs get you put back together and escorted upstairs. Quickly, before a certain someone gets even more worked up than he already is.â
Your eyebrows numbly lift straight up to your hairline. You canât help it. Master Zandik had ⌠noticed your absence?
Oh, this certainly could not be good. How long had you been down here?Â
For better or worse you donât get the chance to truly fret over what consequences await you on that front when the Doctor is so quick to reach for you, snagging you by the arms and hauling you up into a sitting position. Youâre not sure how but you still find the presence of mind for your cheeks to grow warm as you very self consciously shove your tits back into your shirt with no shortage of effort. Your limbs donât want to cooperate after being strapped down and desperately yanked on for such a long period of time, for starters. And for another Dottore is much too impatient to wait. He simply grabs you around the waist and slides you down to stand with him even when you donât want to.Â
Or would have, if your legs were not weakened to the state of a newborn fawns, and you half collapse against him with a whimper. To your fast mounting surprise, however, he takes a moment just to coo over you, clucking his tongue rather chidingly while he tugs you tighter up against him.Â
But you quickly realize that his behavior does not stem from any sense of chivalry or true concern for you when, in the process of gathering you to his front, he shoves your tits up against himself to observe the fleshy squish. You suck in a sharp breath, trying to lean back in his hold but itâs no use. His hold on you is absolute and even without being able to see any other part of his face besides his mouth you can still feel the way he leers down at you, burning into your skin. Â
âYouâre lucky I found you when I did.â He intones, giving your middle a too tight, possessive squeeze. âI know perfectly well what sort of interests âIâ had at twenty-five and judging by the state youâre already in ⌠yes, I donât imagine âmyâ excitement would have abated anytime soon. Not with such a lovely specimen right at my fingertips.âÂ
You donât exactly like the way he says it in such a sultry, seductive tone, as if it was something erotic and not the invasive procedure youâd just had to live through. Yet you still find yourself clinging to him while you try to steady your weak legs, hands balling in the front of his coat pitifully.Â
âI wasnât going to hurt her. Not really, anyway.â The other one says, coming up next to the two of you. Crossing his arms over his narrow chest with his hip cocked to lean into the table, he sends you a cool look behind his glasses. âI already told her that we still have use for her outside of this little dalliance. My assistant was in no danger.âÂ
Both you and Dottore turn your heads to stare at him, in near perfect unison, although you could only guess that the reason for his surprise was not the same as yours. You just canât accept the word âdallianceâ given the context, though. Was it really something so benign in his eyes? You felt violated in a way that even the Doctorâs hasty probing of your cunt had not left you feeling the other day in the library, and the spot between your legs was an uncomfortably sticky, excessive mess in the aftermath. Everything hurt, sore and achy where heâd touched you, penetrated you, wedged you open for his own sick amusement. Gods, you couldnât wait to take a bath.Â
âI - I really am sorry.â You murmur, bringing Dottoreâs attention back around to you. âFor disobeying your orders and ⌠and the Masterâs. I wouldnât have come down here if I hadnât seen that strange person. I swear it.âÂ
Drawing a clipped breath, the Doctor nudges you away from him to stand fully on your own now, and youâre quite glad when your body decides to cooperate this time. Still a bit uncertain and weak, but thankfully you donât fall to the ground like a puppet thatâs had its strings cut as he takes pinching hold of your wrist to steer you away from the exam area and the bespectacled man.Â
âFrankly, little mouse, I donât particularly care what you do or with whom. If youâd like to carry on with all of us in addition to Zandik himself then that is of no concern to me. However, I must admit that I had thought to keep this specific aspect of the situation a well kept secret for a little while longer. At least until I was certain you wouldnât in good conscience be able to flee in fear of what you have discovered inside this place. Luckily, though, it seems like you have already made the correct choice. Isnât that right?âÂ
His gloved hand tightens on your arm with a low creak of leather, making you wince. But you canât really say you donât understand why he would be upset with you, given how many rules youâve broken, how many orders youâve disregarded in your misguided search for answers. Youâre certain Zandik is likely displeased with you too, and you absolutely hate how much the thought of that makes your chest twist up.Â
Stumbling to keep pace with the Doctor as he leads you back through the tables, the banks of machinery, the experiments and the litany of complicated tools, you fumble to get your shirt buttoned up with the use of only one hand. But he doesnât slow down or shorten the length of his strides to accommodate you, even when you reach the steep stairwell another moment later. In fact, he practically drags you up them, tripping the whole way, before you finally come out at the landing.Â
Itâs like you can finally breathe again and you gratefully suck in a much needed mouthful of relatively clean air. Although it is a bit dusty in here you still find a great deal of relief in this. At least you can no longer taste the bitter flavor of oil and metal on the back of your tongue now, or the chemical spritz of antiseptics.
But he still doesnât let go of you just yet, pulling you out of that tiny room and down the hallway, past the kitchen and down another corridor until you reach the seldom used formal dining room. You have no idea why he would bring you here, of all places; and yet when he throws the door open and yanks you inside, pulling you like a disobedient child, you quickly get your answer.Â
Zandik sits in one of the finely crafted wooden chairs, turned to face the doorway expectantly, which surprises you enough to briefly distract you from the deep scowl on his face. How had he gotten down here? Surely he couldnât have managed the staircase on his own, or ⌠was it possible that the Doctor had helped him down to the first floor after finding the old man alone?Â
Oh, you really were in big trouble, werenât you?Â
âWhere were you?â Zandik rattles out now, startling you from your disoriented stupor. Both of his hands are on the grip of his cane where itâs propped up between his knees, one stacked on top of the other, and they visibly shake from how vigorously he seems to be squeezing it.Â
That manages to surprise you too. Youâd never seen him this mad before and you almost donât even know what to say in this face of his anger. Somehow, it was even more frightening than the Doctorâs simmering displeasure with you.Â
âWell?â He goes on, demanding an answer when your nervous silence prevails. âWhat have you been doing this whole time? I could probably take a guess but I want to hear you say it. Iâm waiting.â
Your mouth slowly opens but nothing comes out. What could you even say?Â
Unfortunately, the Doctor is right there to jump in and answer for you.Â
âSomeone found their way down into the cellar where they had a very interesting encounter indeed, given the unfolding scene I just so happened to walk in on. Isnât that right, little mouse?âÂ
You turn your head to gape at him in utter disbelief. Why would he say it like that to make it sound as if it were something so tawdry? As if youâd even had a say in the matter.Â
âYou â you!â Zandik struggles to find the words, so enraged he canât seem to get them out for a moment. âI told you not to go wandering off on your own, you stupid little girl! Why did you disobey me?âÂ
âI ⌠Iâm sorry - -â You try, but heâs quick to cut you off. He simply doesnât want to hear it.Â
âEnough. I donât care for your excuses. Give her to me. Now.â
Shocking you a great deal, the Doctor obliges that request and starts to tug you further into the room by your arm. You wouldnât have thought heâd do much of anything the old man asked of him, at least not without giving him snark about it first.Â
And itâs exactly that easy acquiescence that seems to set off every single alarm bell in your head, making your skin prickle as youâre drug over to Zandikâs chair. Something about the situation strikes you as dangerous and you instinctively try to pull back on that constricting grip but itâs no use. The Doctorâs fist is like an iron manacle on your wrist as he steers you right up alongside the old man who reaches up to grab your arm from him, pulling you towards himself.Â
For a split second youâre struck by a naive, hopeful little flutter that Zandik is going to embrace you and check you over for injuries or bruises. Coddle you and pet you as he has been so inclined to do as of late. A very real part of you wants to believe he was only worried about you, and rightfully so, given your most recent harrowing ordeal.Â
But that is not what happens.Â
Instead, he gives your captured limb a hard yank that pulls you off balance when your legs were already weak enough as it was. You tip forward, practically collapsing against him, and Zandik quickly grabs at the back of your neck with his other hand to force you the rest of the way down. Over his lap.Â
A painfully sharp breath catches in your throat, so violent it makes your eyes vibrate in their sockets.Â
Thatâs all you can manage to do before the first hard swat lands across your upturned ass to make you jolt. Youâre so shocked by it, so stunned that you almost donât believe itâs actually happening until another heavy handed blow sends you lurching against his thighs just a split second later.Â
âDonât even think about trying to get up off my lap, you damned stupid girl.â He snarls at you, very aware of the way you grow tense and stiffen, as if you were readying to do just that. âYouâre going to take your spanking and youâre going to thank me for it when Iâm done, do you understand me? Youâre lucky this is all Iâm going to do to you.â
When you donât answer quickly enough, he smacks your ass again to make you yelp.Â
âWhen I ask you a question, I expect an answer!âÂ
âY - yes, Master Zandik! I understand! Iâm so sorry!â
Another squeak soon follows when his palm immediately claps down on your backside hard enough to make tears spring up in your eyes. It hardly even registers though when youâre so stunned, so humiliated to be taken over his knee like this. Youâd almost thought he hadnât been serious about that threat issued in the drawing room earlier, that he wouldnât actually do it, but now you could see just how serious he really was. And right in front of the Doctor too.Â
Your face is positively on fire while you force yourself to stay in that embarrassing position when you want nothing more than to jump up and flee while he rains punishing blows upon your ass, one right after another, to a faltering, discordant beat of fleshy slaps. It shocks you how much force heâs able to put behind the swing of his sharp bony hand which seems to crack across the meat of your behind with withering precision to make you fidget. All of it seems to pale in comparison, though, to the way he continues to scold you and chide you, giving you a proper tongue lashing while he spanks your ass red and raw.Â
âYou empty headed fool! I warned you, didnât I? It was one of the first things I told you! Donât go wandering around like a lost child. Donât go into the cellar. I didnât think that would be such a difficult instruction for you to understand. You have no idea what kind of trouble youâd be in right now if youâd touched something dangerous down there!â He rattles out above you, raising his voice to be heard over the sounds coming from the meaty slap of your ass and your wailing mouth, already panting hard despite the fact heâd only just started.Â
That realization sparks a tiny little flutter of hope in your aching chest, and you desperately latch onto it. The limited amount of stamina in his old body really just might be the only thing that saves you from a real thrashing, but it was much too late to save even a fraction of your ego.Â
Especially when you were still slick between the legs, both holes a goopy mess from the surgeon's cruel machinations. And after heâd cut away your underwear there was absolutely nothing standing between your cunt and the cool air other than the flimsy material of your skirt but it was laughable how easy that could be flipped out of the way. It has you self consciously squirming in place and squeezing your thighs, legs crossing at the ankles in a blithe attempt to shield yourself from his notice while he punishes you quite soundly.Â
But then, you hear it â just barely over the uneven tempo of your ass being ruthlessly smacked. The unmistakable creak of a boot on the hardwood and you suddenly remember that the Doctor was still there, standing right behind you. Watching this mortifying spectacle. Your skin feels like itâs trying to crawl away when you shudder at that reminder and you stiffly start to push upright against your better sense and judgement. You had to at least try to get out of this mortifying position.Â
Swat!Â
âI said stay put!â Zandik snaps at you. âAnd donât make me tell you again, stupid girl. I can promise you youâll come to regret it if you test my patience any further than you already have.âÂ
Whimpering at the settling sting that starts to blanket over your trembling body, you awkwardly rock forward to stay prone just as the Doctor drawls a very amused chuckle somewhere just over your shoulder.Â
âI donât think you have her quite procumbent enough, old man. Make her spread her legs for you. That should help.âÂ
You draw a sharp breath to protest, to beg him to just go away, but one of his boots slips into the space between your feet to kick them apart, making you choke on it. Heâs utterly casual about the way he nudges you into an even wider spread until the toes of your buckled shoes are just able to touch the ground and accommodate the stretch. Seething a quiet hiss under your breath, you quickly realize that being positioned like this makes you settle much more fully across Zandikâs lap on your stomach. Less leverage for you to try and scramble away.Â
âAnd keep them spread.â The Doctor warns, his voice that same low, almost sultry drawl, as he moves to step behind the chair now.Â
âI donât need your help to smack some sense into a disobedient little girl.â Zandik snorts, still struggling to catch his breath in that brief lull. Itâs obvious that this level of exertion is taking quite a lot out of him and you pray that means heâll wrap it up soon. Maybe just another minute or so, if you were lucky.Â
But to your skin crawling horror, he instead reaches down to unceremoniously flip your skirt up without so much as a word of warning, not even giving you a chance to beg him not to do it.Â
What he finds underneath â or a lack thereof â makes him tense against you in clear surprise, the vibration of his shock roiling through his body into yours. Whimpering helplessly at the sensation of being so completely exposed from the waist down now, the waft of air against your bare cheeks and equally bare cunt, you helplessly start to squirm in place. You couldnât get up though. Even if youâd wanted to make another attempt, you felt like you were going to pass out from sheer embarrassment as the room spins dizzily around you.Â
âYou -!â The old man sputters, momentarily at a loss for words. But he recovers quickly enough to bring the flat of his hand down hard on your ass again, making you jerk at the recoil and squeal. âIs this why you snuck off on your own? To get this hungry little cunt of yours stuffed by someone else? Is that it?âÂ
âN - no - -âÂ
Barking a harsh, bitter laugh, Zandik slips that hand between the forced spread of your thighs to cup your quim in a tight, pinching squeeze. You almost catch yourself trying to close your legs and shield your pussy from being inspected by those cold, wizened digits, fighting the urge even as you instinctively nudge back into that touch. This only earns you another humorless scoff though, and you wince as if heâd just struck you again.Â
âLook at you. Even when Iâve got you over my knee you just canât stop thinking with your cunt, can you? No wonder an old manâs fingers werenât enough to keep you satisfied. You needed to go find a younger cock just to get your fill, didnât you?âÂ
You give your head a frantic shake, struggling to find enough oxygen to speak. âNo, Master! I - itâs not like that, I swear! I wouldnât - -â
âYouâre still soaking wet, you idiot girl!â He snaps, roughly swiping his thumb down the pudgy crease of your slit to further smear the evidence of your arousal.Â
But even that condescending gesture is not enough to appease his ire, nor is the way you quake over his thighs and mewl a harried, undeniably needy sound at that impartial touch. You might have expected it from the Doctor, definitely the surgeon, but not Zandik. He wasnât supposed to touch you like this.Â
And yet that is exactly what he does as he brings both hands down to grab two pinching handfuls of your ass cheeks, spreading you open with utter impartiality. Your head snaps up in hot faced alarm at the realization of what heâs doing but thereâs absolutely nothing you can do to prevent it. You have no choice but to obediently stay in place, left to tremble uncontrollably in your prone position while he takes a good long look at you.Â
âGods, girl.â He hisses. âEven your ass too? You really are a needy little thing, to have both of your holes freshly used and to still think you can present this sloppy pussy to me? Youâre unbelievable.âÂ
âI - itâs not like that!â You wail, hiccuping on your own misery, but he doesnât seem to care for anything at all you have to say right now.Â
âDonât lie to me! Do you think Iâm stupid? Just look at the creamy mess one of them's made of you. And which one was it, huh? Whoâd you spread your ass for?âÂ
The pad of a cool, wrinkled finger passes over the pucker of your back entrance then, a harsh, unforgiving swipe to make you outright jolt. But it quickly comes back to press into the slackened center and you shrill a startled sound when he starts to slip inside the constricting passage with relative ease. Still sticky with lubricant, still stretched from earlier. Â
And the worst part of all is how immediately your pussy responds to the penetration, squeezing tight with a renewed, tingling rush of warmth that is not even half as displeased as youâd like it to be. Even after being overworked and overstimulated down in the cellar, your body still somehow finds the energy to respond with eager enthusiasm, and something about that realization seems to further crack your worn down psyche.Â
Maybe he was right. Maybe you really were just a needy, stupid little girl who could only think with her cunt.Â
Just as you start to hang your head in defeat, wanting nothing more than to cry, a shift of movement at your peripheral catches your attention. You cautiously nudge your face to the side to watch as the Doctor steps out from where heâd retreated behind the old manâs chair to stand next to it instead. Just peering down at you. Still smirking under that horrible mask of his.  Â
âOh. Poor thing.â He coos, giving his tongue a sharp, belittling click. âDonât look so put out. Youâre still in good company here, even if we do have to see you appropriately disciplined for your transgressions. Rules are rules, as you know, and you broke one of the very few you were given. That makes for a rather pressing matter of concern from the standpoint of your employers, donât you think? After all ⌠if youâre even willing to go against such a simple, basic command then what else wonât you be willing to do, I wonder?âÂ
Your slackjawed surprise at his instigating commentary is quickly washed away and replaced by simmering anger to leave you glaring up at him through the swimming sheen of tears from that awkward angle. The fact he does not even try to help you by explaining the situation â the real situation, as heâd seen it with his own eyes â does not exactly come as a surprise. But for him to actively make it worse like this? You could just scream.Â
Yet, Zandik scoffs a gruff sound of agreement then, drawing your attention when he evidently deems himself satisfied with his perusal of your ass. Your face feels like itâs hot enough to catch fire as he pulls his finger out to leave the fleshy pucker slightly raised and searching for more. There would be none forthcoming from here on out though, and he quickly sets back in to mercilessly swat your ass some more. Smack! Smack! Smack! Again and again, and again.Â
And it hurts that much more, you find, without the flimsy barrier of your housekeeping uniform in the way to offer even some small semblance of protection from those sharp strikes. Back and forth, back and forth between the left cheek and the right, he spanks you until the skin starts to feel sore and unbearably warm while the Doctor just continues to watch. Observing your humiliation from his front row seat. The sick bastard. Â
âTake your hands off the chair.â He abruptly says a long stretch of moments later, when itâs getting harder and harder to keep the sobs choking up your chest held back. âThatâs it. Reach down and grab the legs instead. I want to see you completely prone and remind you that you are at our mercy here.âÂ
As if that were ever even up for debate.Â
But you squeeze your eyes shut as you hesitantly obey, teeth clenched tight to stop yourself from full on wailing when the salty tears start to leak out. Releasing your death grip on the edge of the seat, you let your arms hang down to curl clammy hands around the wooden legs as heâd instructed. It seems to stretch you out even more across Zandikâs lap though, and you quickly come to understand why the Doctor had wanted to see you positioned like this. You have no way to brace against the hard, stinging strikes over your vulnerable ass, no way to lurch or absorb the blows now. All you can do is cling desperately and take your spanking until Zandik decided you were well and truly done.Â
Unfortunately for you, that seems to drag on for an eternity. Or maybe it just feels like it does. The only thing you know for certain is that your ass hurts, throbbing and smarting, the skin heated enough that you think you surely wonât be able to sit down properly for a week. And the fact your pussy just continues to obscenely drool throughout the course of your punishment doesnât escape your notice either, even when you would really rather pretend otherwise.Â
But, finally, Zandik at last seems to wear himself out. After landing one last, toe curling swat across your ass, he deflates back into the chair with an overexerted huff. He has to take a moment just to catch his breath, panting vigorously over top of you, while you valiantly try to get yourself under control. Itâs an exceedingly difficult task though, particularly after everything else youâd already experienced in but a single day, and now this on top of it. You were having trouble just processing everything, struggling to make any sense of it.Â
Youâd never gotten spanked before, not even by your own parents âŚÂ
âYou may get up now.â Zandik sighs at length on a big, whooshing breath, sounding much less enraged now. âQuickly. Hurry it up, before I change my mind. Make yourself look presentable.â
Still weeping and sniffling sadly, you gingerly get yourself pushed upright with no shortage of effort and tug your skirt back into place. Youâre a little too sore to be truly self conscious about it though as you fidget on your feet, trying to subtly shake off some of the stinging hurt. Of course it doesnât work, however, and he doesnât miss your tender fidgeting either.Â
âLook at me, girl. And fix your face while youâre at it.â
You visibly wince at the sharp reprimand in his voice, desperately working to school your expression into one that isnât completely wretched and pathetic. But that doesnât quite happen either.Â
Closing his eyes against the pitiful look you give him, Zandik slowly blows out a deep exhale that makes his still heaving shoulders deflate. He looked tired, perhaps more than youâd ever seen him before. And worried, now that the edge of his anger was starting to subside. âWe will discuss this later. Tomorrow, perhaps. You are dismissed for today. Go up to your room and so help me, girl, youâd better not step a single foot out of there for the rest of the night. You will not enjoy the consequences if you disobey me again, do you understand?âÂ
Unable to help it, you shirk back slightly, feeling appropriately cowed even as you quickly nod your acknowledgement. Like you were a child being sent straight to bed without dinner. Oh, you werenât sure how you could ever hope to recover from this level of humiliation.Â
But then, the nearly forgotten Doctor chooses that moment to speak up again. âWait. Iâm not yet satisfied with - -â
âI donât care.â Zandik cuts across him, sending his younger counterpart a tight look of warning. âYou can do whatever youâre going to do on your own time. Sheâs my servant, if youâll recall, not yours. For the time being I want her out of my sight. Everything else can come later.âÂ
The waterworks are suddenly coming full force again, and your chest hitches painfully with the mournful breath you suck in, even when your constricting throat tries to reject it. You know you should probably just stay quiet right now, but âÂ
âI - I - Iâm terribly suh - sorry, Master. It w - wasnât my intention ⌠mmm, please, please donât send me ah - away.âÂ
Turning back to you, the old man softens his features in as much as he seems able to. Itâs enough to violently wrench at your aching heart though, and your stuttering sobs start to come faster. Harder.Â
âStop that senseless blubbering, girl. Before you make yourself sick. Iâm not sending you away for more than a single night. I can manage just fine on my own in such a short period, so donât fret unnecessarily over that. I will see you bright and early tomorrow morning. Is that clear?âÂ
You nod again, even as another forlorn sob starts up in your chest. He really wasnât going to dismiss you? Even after youâd upset him so terribly?
âY - yes, Master Zandik. I understand. I - Iâll see you tomorrow muh - morning then.âÂ
Bracing yourself to leave, you hesitate only long enough to send the Doctor a tearful glance. He just continues to stand there with his arms folded behind his back though, and he makes no move to stop you when you shuffle slowly towards the door. The throbbing pain that splinters out from your sore ass ensures you take every step carefully, mindfully, as you shuffle back out into the hall by yourself. Leaving the two of them to talk about you in private, no doubt.Â
Youâre still crying when you at last make it up to the second floor some moments later but those great big, wracking sobs are gradually starting to lessen, bit by bit. It seems as if you just donât have the energy for it anymore, which is both a good and a bad thing. Good, because you can barely see where youâre going through the tears. Bad, because you canât even recall a time when youâd felt quite so drained and exhausted.Â
Well, if nothing else you should sleep very soundly tonight.Â
That knowledge is the only real source of comfort you have in the moment and you find that you are quite looking forward to resting up after this trying day. Perhaps things wouldnât look so very bleak in the morning light.Â
But when you finally reach your door and pull it open, youâre forced to come up short before you can step inside. The shocking sight that greets you comes dangerously close to sending you crashing to the floor in an unconscious heap, especially after everything else youâve already experienced today.Â
A young man aggressively hunches over your unoccupied bed, his gray slacks slouched loosely around his hips. He has his head bowed between his shaking shoulders in concentration and the mouth you can see through the side of his half-mask is pulled back in a vicious snarl, revealing two sets of bizarrely sharpened teeth. Wispy blue hair in a boyish tousle, full and fluffy looking even at a distance where it hangs down in his face. Â
Youâre so gobsmacked by what youâve just walked in on that for a tortuously long stretch of seconds you simply canât make any sense at all of what heâs even doing. But then you notice it.Â
The slipper clutched in a crushing grip which he enthusiastically drives his cock into, fucking himself in its soft clutch with an almost wild abandon.Â
Your mouth warbles open in utter disbelief. Nothing comes out though, not even a scandalized gasp, as you just stand there, watching him shake and judder towards what you can only imagine will be an explosive release. He doesnât even seem to notice that he has an audience now, so caught up in enjoying himself with your slipper to aid him that he evidently didnât hear the door opening.Â
And watching him thrust like that, the center of his balance focused so singlemindedly on the hard shove of his cock, undeniably makes something low in your gut start to curl with growing interest. Youâd never seen a man fucking, well. Anything before. The thought that they might look so ⌠good doing it had never so much as crossed your mind. Even in spite of the lingering throb across your ass cheeks, the sore, violated ache deep in your pussy, your body still finds enough of an energy reserve to respond to the shameful display.Â
Gods, maybe Zandik was right. You really were something else.Â
For better or worse, though, it only takes another minute or two before the punishing force of his narrow hips starts to turn uneven, jerking aimlessly now while his groaning, faltering sounds of pleasure rapidly quicken. Growing more frantic, breathless, snarling a vicious sound as he finally tips his head back and â
Cums such a healthy, excessive load that you can see it dripping and oozing out down the slipper while he continues to fuck himself into the mess heâs made for another moment longer. Just grunting, sighing, hissing his relief until the tremors slow to a stop to leave him panting shallowly in the aftermath. Utterly spent.Â
You think you should probably beat a hasty retreat before youâre discovered but you canât quite seem to tear your eyes away from him. Itâs no mystery who he is. That wavy, wispy blue hair was all the introduction you needed, and that half-mask ⌠he was the one in the cellar stairwell last night.Â
Your eyes go round as saucers. Then he must have also been the one who cleaned up your broken lamp, ensuring a fire didnât start, and then he took off with your slipper afterwards. In truth, you hadnât even considered that it might have been swiped for this purpose.Â
But why was he in your room then?Â
A fresh shudder tears up your spine when you watch him slowly ease back to slip his cock out, still hard and uncomfortably rigid even as it drips the sticky spend heâd worked up into a froth. Thereâs so much of it, in fact, that you can see the slipper is completely coated with clumpy, gooey, half dried semen even from where you were standing. And it hits you. This wasnât his first round. Heâd been using your slipper to jerk off for â for who even knows how long now.Â
âOh.â You blurt, so startled by this discovery that you canât quite catch it, and his head suddenly snaps up with a start.Â
For the stretch of a single heartbeat the two of you just stare at one another, both sets of eyes widened to comically shocked proportions.Â
Then he abruptly throws the slipper down and bolts for it, shoving right past you in a sudden rush to get out into the hall. He slams you back against the doorjam in the process, momentarily stunning you, but by the time you recover enough to peer down the corridor after him, he is already gone. Not even so much as a hint of blue hair or the tippy tap of distant feet. How very strange. How very ⌠typical of what your life was slowly turning into.Â
Rather surreptitiously now, you close the door and lock it behind you before making your way over to the rumpled bed where you just stare down at the abandoned slipper for a terribly long time. Thinking he shouldâve just taken it with him if heâd already soiled it this much, you gather your courage and hesitantly reach out to pick it up.Â
But you immediately grimace at the bubbly, creamy mess heâs left inside and blindly toss it away to land somewhere unseen. It could fall straight into the pits of hell for all you cared.Â
A fresh sob starts to make itself known in your hitching chest and, feeling so completely broken down you simply canât bring yourself to stand any longer, you sink down to your knees and just let yourself cry.Â
With how insane our favourite religious zealot was imagining their first time, how did Ormund and reader's first time go? Also, how does his toxic gaslighting translate in bed?
I just know reader couldn't walk straight for a good while after đ
The Marriage Debt
Dark!Ormund X Targaryen!Reader
TW: explicit sexual content, dub-con, non-consensual sex, marital rape, sexual coercion, power imbalance, manipulation, loss of virginity, psychological distress, degradation, rough sex, alcohol consumption.
The wedding had been everything a princess could dream of, and yet you had felt like a stranger in your own body throughout all of it.
The High Septon had droned on for what felt like hours, his voice echoing through the vast, vaulted space, and you had barely heard a word of it. Your eyes had been fixed on Ormund, on your husband, on the man you had chosen, on the man who had courted you so tenderly and written you such beautiful letters. He had looked at you throughout the ceremony with such intensity, such focus, that you had felt like the only person in the world. His eyes had never left your face, and every time you met his gaze, something fluttered in your stomach. Anticipation. Nerves. Something that felt very much like love.
When the septon bound your hands together with a ribbon and declared you one flesh, one heart, one soul, now and forever, Ormund had smiled. It was a slow smile, a satisfied smile, the smile of a man who had gotten exactly what he wanted.
You should have noticed that. You should have understood what it meant.
The feast afterward had been a blur. The great hall had been transformed into a sea of candles and flowers and glittering silver, and the noise of a hundred conversations had washed over you like a wave. You had been seated beside your new husband on the dais, your hand in his, and course after course had been presented to you. You had barely eaten. Your stomach was too tight, too fluttery, too full of nerves.
But you had drunk. Oh, you had drunk.
The wine was sweet and it went down like honey, and every time your cup was empty, a servant was there to refill it. You had not meant to drink so muchâyou had never been much of a drinker, had never developed a taste for itâbut the wine warmed your belly and softened the edges of your anxiety and made everything feel slightly distant, slightly dreamlike, like you were watching yourself from very far away.
Ormund had encouraged it. His hand had rested on your knee beneath the table, heavy and warm, his thumb tracing slow circles through the silk of your gown. Every time you glanced at him, he was already looking at you, and his eyes were so dark, so hungry, that you felt yourself blushing and had to look away.
"Drink," he had murmured in your ear, his breath warm against your skin. "It will help with the nerves."
And so you had drunk.
Now the feast was over. The guests had retired to their chambers or continued their revelry elsewhere. Your ladies had undressed you an hour ago their hands efficient and fast as they unlaced your wedding gown, unhooked your corset, removed your stockings and your slippers and your jewels. They had chattered as they worked, offering congratulations and advice and sly, knowing comments that made your cheeks burn.
They had dressed you in the shift. The bridal shift. It was beautiful, you could not deny that, pale ivory silk so fine it was almost transparent, the fabric clinging to every curve and hollow of your body like a second skin. The straps were thin as spider silk, the neckline dipping low enough to show the swell of your breasts. The hem barely reached your thighs. When you moved, the silk slid against your skin in a way that made you acutely aware of your own nakedness beneath it.
It was meant to entice. It was meant to be removed.
Your ladies had left you then, retreating with final words of encouragement and knowing smiles, and the door had clicked shut behind them with a sound that felt terribly final. You were alone. Alone in your husband's chambers, in your chambers now, yours and his together.
You had been standing by the window for what felt like a very long time. The wine cup was still in your handâyou had refused to give it up, had clung to it like a talismanâand you raised it to your lips again, letting the sweet liquid coat your tongue. The windows looked out over the city, over the Honeywine River glittering silver in the moonlight, over the distant shadow of the Citadel and the dark expanse of the Whispering Sound beyond. Somewhere out there, beyond the city walls, Aegarax was sleeping in a field. You wished, suddenly and fiercely, that you were with him. That you could climb onto his back and fly away, fly home to Dragonstone, fly anywhere but here.
But that was foolish. That was childish. You were a wife now. You had a duty to perform.
You heard the door open behind you. The soft click of the latch, the whisper of the hinges. Footsteps on the stone floor, heavy and deliberate. The door closed again.
"Are you well, my love?"
His voice was low and warm. The voice that had spoken so many sweet words to you during your courtship. The voice that had told you that you were beautiful, that you were precious, that you were the most desirable woman he had ever seen.
You did not turn around. You could not turn around. Your heart was beating too fast, your palms suddenly damp against the wine cup.
"Yes." Your voice came out smaller than you intended, almost childlike. "I am just... I am a bit nervous."
"There is nothing to be nervous about." His footsteps drew closer, slow and measured. You could feel him approaching, feel the heat of his body, the weight of his presence filling the room behind you. "It is only me. Only your husband."
"I know." You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. The wine had made everything soft and hazy, but it had not quieted the anxious flutter in your chest. "It is just that I have never... I mean, I do not really know what to..."
What to do. What to expect. What to say. What to feel. You did not know anything. Your mother had told you that it was your duty, that you must submit to your husband and let him guide you, that there might be some discomfort at first but that it would pass. She had spoken in euphemisms and poetic metaphors, her hands clasped around yours, her violet eyes searching your face as if looking for something she did not find.
"Shh." He was right behind you now. You could feel the heat radiating from his body, could smell him, leather and wine and something musky underneath, something that made your stomach tighten with an emotion you could not name. "There is nothing to be afraid of, my sweet girl. I am going to take care of you. I am going to make you feel things you have never felt before. Do you trust me?"
"Yes." The word came out automatically, the way it had a hundred times during your courtship. "Yes, I trust you."
"Good girl. Turn around."
You took one last sip of wine for courage. The cup was almost empty now, and you wished it were full again. You wished you had drunk more. You wished you had drunk enough to make the world disappear entirely, and then, because you could delay no longer, you turned around.
The wine cup slipped from your fingers.
He was completely, utterly naked.
He stood not three feet away from you, and he was so much. So much bigger than you, so much more solid. His shoulders were broad and heavily muscled, his chest covered in a thick mat of dark hair that trailed down his stomach in a narrowing line. His arms were thick with muscle, his hands large and strong. And lowerâ
Your eyes dropped before you could stop them, a horrified fascination drawing your gaze downward. The hair continued, thickening again at his groin, and jutting from it, unmistakable and impossible to ignore, was hisâ
You jerked your eyes back up to his face, your cheeks flooding with heat, your heart hammering so hard you could feel it in your throat. Your hands were shaking. Your whole body was shaking. You had never seen a man's naked body before. You had never seen that before, that thing, that part of him, and it was so much larger than you had imagined, so much more intimidating. It stood erect, curving upward toward his stomach, and you could not comprehend how it was supposed to fit inside you. It looked impossible. It looked like it would split you in half.
He was smiling. It was a slow smile, a knowing smile, the smile of a man who had seen your shock and found it deeply satisfying. He stood there in his nakedness with the absolute confidence of a man who knew exactly what he wanted and had no doubt that he would get it.
"You are shy," he said. It was not a question.
Your mouth opened, but no sound came out. You could not stop staring at his face now, clinging to eye contact like a lifeline, terrified that if your gaze dropped again you would see it again, that thing, that impossible thing.
"IâI have neverâ" The words came out in a stammer, broken and breathless. "I did not realize you wereâthat you had alreadyâwhen did youâ"
Your eyes flickered involuntarily to the pile of clothing on the floor behind him. His tunic, his breeches, his smallclothes, all discarded in a heap near the door. He must have undressed while you were standing at the window. He must have stripped himself bare while your back was turned, and you had not heard a thing. You had not heard anything except your own panicked heartbeat.
"I did not want to waste any more time." He stepped closer, and you instinctively stepped back. Your bare shoulders pressed against the cold stone of the window frame, and you realized with a jolt of panic that there was nowhere else to go. You were trapped between him and the wall. "I have been waiting for this night for a very long time. A year. More than a year. Every moment I spent with you during our courtship, I was thinking about this. About having you. About what it would feel like to finally be inside you."
The word inside made your stomach clench. You pressed yourself harder against the window, the stone cold through the thin silk of your shift. "Ormund, Iâ"
"Do you know how many nights I lay awake thinking about you?" He took another step, and now he was close enough to touch. Close enough that you could feel the heat radiating from his body. Close enough that if you reached out, your hand would press against his bare chest. "Do you know how many times I imagined this? Imagined you? Imagined all the things I was going to do to you once you were finally mine?"
Your breath caught in your throat. His words were meant to be romanticâthey were the words of a man who desired his wife, who had been patient, who had waitedâbut there was something in his voice that made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.
"I thought about you too," you whispered, because it seemed like the right thing to say. "I thought about... about tonight. About being your wife."
"Did you?" His hand came up, and you flinched before you could stop yourself. He noticed but he did not comment on it. Instead, he reached past you and took the wine cup from the windowsill where it had come to rest. He set it aside, his movements slow and deliberate. "And what did you imagine?"
You shook your head, your cheeks burning. "I do not know. I do not... my mother told me some things, but I do not really understand. I do not know what to expect."
"Your mother." He said the word with an edge that you did not quite understand. "And what did your mother tell you?"
"She said..." You swallowed hard, trying to remember the exact words. "She said that it was my duty. That I must submit to my husband. That there might be some discomfort at first, but that it would pass. She said that it was how children were made. That it was the marriage debt."
"The marriage debt." He smiled again, and this time there was something almost predatory in it. "Is that what you think this is? A debt to be paid?"
"No, IâI do not know. I do not know what to think."
"Then let me tell you." He reached out and touched your face, his fingers tracing the line of your jaw. His hand was warm, almost hot, and you felt yourself trembling beneath his touch. "This is not a debt. This is a gift. The gift of your body to me, and my body to you. The gift of pleasure. The gift of children. The gift of becoming one flesh, the way the septon said. Do you understand?"
You nodded, even though you did not understand. You did not understand anything except that his hand was on your face and his body was so close and you were trapped against the cold stone window and you could not stop shaking.
"You are trembling," he said. His thumb stroked your cheek, gentle and slow. "Are you afraid of me?"
"No." The word came out too quickly. "No, I am not afraid. I am just... I am nervous. I told you. I have never done this before."
"I know you have not." His voice dropped lower, becoming almost a purr. "That is what makes this so precious. You are untouched. Pure. No man has ever seen you like this, has ever touched you, has ever been inside you. I am the first. I will be the only. Your body will know no one but me, for the rest of your life."
The words should have been romantic, but they did not feel like it.
"Lift your arms," he said.
You hesitated. Your arms felt heavy, weighted down by something you could not name. But he was waiting, his eyes fixed on your face, and you did not want to disappoint him. You did not want to be a bad wife on your very first night.
You lifted your arms. He grasped the hem of your shift and pulled it upward. The silk slid over your skin, cool and whispering, and then it was over your head and gone, discarded somewhere on the floor. You were naked. Completely, utterly naked, standing in front of your husband with nothing to hide behind.
The air in the room was warm from the fire, but you felt suddenly, terribly cold. You wrapped your arms around yourself instinctively, trying to cover your breasts, trying to hide, but he caught your wrists and gently pulled them away.
"No," he said. "Do not hide from me. You are my wife now. I want to see you."
He stepped back, just slightly, just enough to look at you. His eyes traveled over your body with an intensity that made your skin prickle. You had never felt so exposed, so vulnerable, so utterly seen. He looked at your breasts, at the curve of your waist, at the curls at the juncture of your thighs. He looked at you the way a collector looks at a new acquisition. The way a hungry man looks at a feast.
"Beautiful," he murmured. His voice was thick now, roughened by something that made your stomach clench. "More beautiful than I ever imagined. And I imagined you a great deal."
His hand reached out and touched you. Just the tips of his fingers, tracing the line of your collarbone, down your sternum, between your breasts. Your skin broke out in goosebumps, and you shivered, and you did not know if it was from cold or fear or something else entirely.
"Please," you whispered, and you did not know what you were asking for. Please stop? Please continue? Please be gentle?
"Please what?" His fingers continued their slow exploration, circling one breast, brushing over the nipple. You gasped at the sensation, it was strange and sharp and not entirely unpleasant, a tingling that seemed to travel from your breast down to somewhere much lower. "Please what, my sweet girl?"
"I do not know," you admitted, your voice barely audible. "I do not know what to ask for. I do not know what I want."
"Then let me show you." He cupped your breast fully now, his palm warm and rough against your sensitive skin. "Let me teach you. That is my role now, as your husband. To teach you what your body is capable of. To show you pleasures you have never dreamed of."
He leaned down and captured your mouth in a kiss. You had been kissed before. Chaste kisses, the kind of kisses a betrothed couple exchanged in chaperoned parlors. This was not that. His mouth was hot and demanding, his lips pressing against yours with a force that made your head spin. His tongue pushed past your lips, filling your mouth, and you made a small, startled sound against him. You did not know what to do with your tongueâno one had ever told youâso you just let him take what he wanted.
One hand tangled in your hair, tilting your head back, holding you in place. The other continued its exploration of your body, sliding down your stomach, over your hip, around to grasp your arse. He pulled you against him, and you felt it, that part of him, that impossible part, pressing hard and hot against your bare stomach. You whimpered into his mouth, and he swallowed the sound.
"You taste like wine," he murmured against your lips. "Sweet. So sweet."
He kissed you again, deeper this time, and his hand slid from your backside to your thigh, gripping it, lifting it. He pressed himself against you, and you felt him there, right there, so close to where you had never been touched.
"Ormund," you gasped, breaking the kiss. "Wait. Wait, please. I am notâI do notâ"
"Shh." He pressed his forehead to yours, his breath coming in harsh pants. "I know. I know you are nervous. But I have waited so long. So very long. And you are so beautiful. Can you feel what you do to me? Can you feel how much I want you?"
You could feel it. Gods, you could feel it. It was pressed against you, insistent and impossible, and you did not understand how this was supposed to work. You did not understand how any of this was supposed to work.
"Come," he said, and it was not a request. "Come to the bed."
He did not wait for an answer. He bent and scooped you into his arms as if you weighed nothing at all, one arm beneath your knees and the other around your back. You clutched at his shoulders instinctively, your face pressed against his neck, your heart hammering so hard you were certain he must be able to feel it. His skin was hot and smelled of sweat.
The bed was soft beneath you when he laid you down. The sheets were cool against your heated skin, and you sank into the feather mattress, feeling very small and very exposed. He stood over you for a moment, looking down at you with those hungry eyes, and then he was on the bed with you, his body covering yours, his weight pressing you into the mattress.
He was so heavy. So much heavier than you had expected. You had never had a grown man lying on top of you before, and the sensation was overwhelmingâthe weight of him, the heat of him, the sheer size of him surrounding you on all sides. You felt trapped. Pinned. You could barely move.
"Relax," he murmured against your throat. His lips were trailing down your neck now, kissing and sucking, and you felt a strange, tingling warmth spreading from each place his mouth touched. "Relax, my love. I am going to make you feel so good. You just have to trust me."
You tried to relax. You tried to let go of the tension coiled in your muscles, tried to surrender to the sensations washing over you. His mouth found your breast, and you gasped as his tongue circled your nipple, as his teeth grazed the sensitive peak. The sensation was sharp and strange and not entirely unpleasant, it sent sparks of something through your body, sparks that seemed to travel downward, settling low in your belly.
"Ormund," you breathed, and you did not know if it was a protest or an encouragement.
"Good," he murmured against your skin. "Good girl. You feel that? That is pleasure. That is what your body is made for."
His hand slid down your stomach, over your hip, between your thighs. You tensed immediately, your legs trying to close, but he was already there, his body blocking you, his hand pressing insistently against your most private place.
"No," you whispered, your face burning with shame. "Please, not thereâ"
"Yes." His voice was firm. "Yes, there. You are my wife. Every part of you belongs to me now. Even this part. Especially this part."
His fingers began to move, stroking and exploring, and you turned your face into the pillow, unable to look at him. No one had ever touched you there before. You had barely even touched yourself thereâit had always seemed forbidden, shameful, something good girls did not do. But his touch was insistent, and despite your embarrassment, despite your shame, your body was beginning to respond.
The heat was building. That strange, unfamiliar heat, coiling low in your belly like a spring being wound too tight. Your hips moved without your permission, pressing into his touch, seeking something you did not understand. He made a low sound of approval.
"That is it," he said. "That is my good girl. Your body knows what it wants, even if you do not."
His fingers found a particular spot, a place that made you gasp and arch off the bed, and he laughed softly. "There. That is what I was looking for. Does that feel good?"
You could not answer. Words had deserted you. There was only sensation, his fingers, his mouth, his weight pressing you into the mattress. The pleasure was building and building, and you did not know what was happening, did not know what to expect, only that it felt like you were climbing toward something vast and terrifying and unknown.
"Let go," he said, his voice low and hypnotic. "Let go, my sweet girl. Let me see you fall apart."
And you did. The pleasure crested, and your body arched off the bed, and a sound tore from your throat that you had never made before, a cry, almost a sob, your fingers clutching at the sheets, at his shoulders, at anything you could reach. The world went white and hot and overwhelming, and for a long, suspended moment, you forgot where you were. You forgot your name. You forgot everything except the feeling of his hands on your body and the pleasure crashing through you in waves.
When you came back to yourself, he was looking down at you with a smile of pure, male satisfaction. His fingers were still between your legs, gentle now, stroking you through the aftershocks.
"Good," he said. "Good. Now you are ready."
He shifted his weight, settling more firmly between your thighs, and you felt him pressing against the place his fingers had just been. Your eyes widened, and the haze of pleasure began to clear, replaced by a cold trickle of fear.
"Ormund, waitâ"
"This will hurt," he said, and his voice was strained now, tight with something that sounded almost like pain. "But only for a moment. Try to relax. It will be easier if you relax."
You tried. You tried to relax, tried to do what he said, tried to be good. But when he pushed inside you, the pain was not just a moment. It was sharp and tearing and all consuming, and you cried outâa real cry this time, high and startled, your hands flying to his shoulders to push him away.
He did not stop. "Shh," he said, but his hips were already moving, pushing deeper , forcing his thick cock deeper into a body that was not ready for him . "Shh. It will pass. Just breathe. Just breathe."
You breathed. You wrapped your arms around his neck and held on and tried to breathe through the pain. Tears leaked from the corners of your eyes and slid down your temples into your hair. You felt yourself stretching around him, felt a burning ache that radiated through your entire lower body, and you did not know if this was normal. You did not know if it was supposed to hurt this much. Your mother had said there might be some discomfort. She had not said it would feel like being torn apart.
"Fuck, there," he groaned against your shoulder, voice thick with lust. "Gods, your cunt is so fucking tight. So perfect."
He began to move. Slow at first, then faster. The bed frame creaked beneath you, a rhythmic counterpoint to the sounds he was making, low, guttural grunts that vibrated against your neck. Wet, obscene sounds filled the room as his cock plunged in and out of your clenching hole, each thrust punching deeper than the last.
You lay pinned beneath him, body jolting with the force of his fucking, your body rocking with each thrust, and tried to find the pleasure he had shown you before. It was there, somewhere, buried beneath the pain and the discomfort and the overwhelming strangeness of it all, but you could not reach it.
"Taking my cock so well," he rasped, sweat-slicked skin sliding over yours. "You were made to be fucked like this. Made to take every inch. Made for me. Say my name."
"Ormund," you whispered, and it came out as a sob.
"Yes. Yes. Again."
"Ormundâ"
He slammed in to the hilt and came with a guttural roar, cock pulsing thick ropes of cum deep inside your stretched pussy. Hot seed flooded your insides, overflowing around his shaft and leaking down your crack as his fingers bruised your hips. You felt every heavy spurt, the wet heat filling you until it had nowhere else to go but out, you realized with a distant sort of shock that you did not even know what it was. Your mother had not told you. No one had told you anything.
He collapsed on top of you, his full weight pressing you into the mattress, and you lay there pinned beneath him, staring at the canopy above the bed, feeling the tears drying on your cheeks and the soreness already beginning to bloom between your legs.
"That," he said, his voice muffled against your neck, "was worth every moment of waiting. Every single moment."
You did not answer. You did not know what to say. You stroked his hair because it seemed like something a wife should do, and you waited for him to move, to roll off you, to let you breathe.
But he did not move. Not for a long time.
When he finally stirred, you felt a rush of relief. It was over. You had done your duty. You could rest now, but he lifted his head and looked down at you, and his eyes were still dark. Still hungry. Still unsatisfied.
"Again," he said.
You stared at him, uncomprehending. "What?"
"Again." He pulled his cock free, leaving your raw, cum slicked cunt gaping and dripping. The sudden emptiness made you wince. Thick white seed leaked from your stretched hole and slid down your thighs "We are not finished. This is our wedding night, my love. Did you think once would be enough? I have waited a year for this. I am going to have you in every way I have imagined. And I have imagined a great many ways."
"But I amâI am soreâ"
"This is your duty." His voice hardened, and the tenderness from a moment ago evaporated like mist in the morning sun. "You are my wife. Your body belongs to me now. And I will have it when and how I choose. That is what you agreed to when you said your vows. That is what it means to be married."
You opened your mouth to argue, but no words came out. Because he was right, wasn't he? This was what you had agreed to. This was what marriage was. Your mother had told you that your body would no longer be your own. She had told you that you must submit to your husband in all things. This was just... this was just what wives did.
Wasn't it?
"On your hands and knees," he said. "Like a bitch. I want to take you from behind."
The word bitch made you flinch, but you obeyed. You did not know how to disobey. You rolled onto your stomach, wincing at the soreness between your legs, and pushed yourself onto all fours, ass raised, thighs parted, your dripping pussy fully exposed. The position felt filthy and degrading. The position felt obscene, degrading, your body exposed and vulnerable in a way that made your face burn with shame.
"Good girl." His hand stroked down your spine, and you shivered. "You learn quickly. That will serve you well in this marriage."
He positioned himself behind you, and you felt him pressing against you againâstill hard, still impossibly large. How was he still hard? You did not understand. You did not understand anything about male bodies or male desires or what was normal and what was not.
"Look at that pretty cunt already leaking my cum."
This time, there was no gentleness at all. He entered you in one rough thrust, and you cried out, your arms nearly buckling beneath you. He gripped your hips hard and started pounding youâfast, merciless strokes that made your ass ripple and your tits swing beneath you. There was no pretense of making you feel good this time, no gentle words, no coaxing. This was for him. Only for him. You cried out as his cock speared your sore walls again, forcing more of his previous load out around his shaft.
"This is what you were made for. To be bent over and used. To milk my cock until I fill you again, your cunt is clenching. You like being fucked like this. You like being my breeding bitch on our wedding night."
Each savage thrust punched deep, the wet slap of his balls against your clit sending sparks through the ache. His hand reached under you, fingers finding your swollen clit. He rubbed it in tight circles while he fucked you harder, the mix of rough pounding and steady stimulation making your thighs shake.
He grunted, his hips slamming against your backside. " This is your purpose. To take my cock. To give me pleasure. To give me children. Nothing else matters."
You buried your face in the pillow, trying to muffle the sounds you were making. Your body was still responding despite everything, your hips pressing back to meet his thrusts without your permission, your body betraying you in the most intimate way possible.
"You feel that? Your body is hungry for me. Your body knows what it wants, even if your mind does not."
The pleasure built fast and sharp. Your body betrayed you again, hips rocking back to meet every thrust. The dual sensations, his cock battering your cervix and his fingers working your clit, pushed you over the edge. You came with a broken moan, walls pulsing and fluttering around him as fresh wetness gushed down his shaft.
Your body obeyed. Your body had always been a traitor. The pleasure built and crested and crashed over you, and you collapsed onto the mattress, your arms no longer able to hold you up. He followed moments later with hot cum pumped deep, mixing with the first round until it overflowed and ran down your legs in thick rivulets. He stayed buried inside you, grinding slow as the last spurts emptied into your twitching cunt.
When he pulled out, and you lay there face, down on the bed, trembling, trying to catch your breath. You thought it was over. You thought surely, surely it must be over now.
But it was not over.
He let you rest for perhaps ten minutes. Maybe less. You could not track time anymore, it had become meaningless, measured only in the spaces between his desires. He lay beside you, his hand stroking your back, your hair, your thigh, and he spoke to you in a low, soothing voice. He told you that you were beautiful. He told you that you were doing so well. He told you that he loved you, that he had always loved you, that he would love you until the end of time.
And then his hands were on you again, and he was pulling you on top of him. "I want to see you ride me," he said, positioning you so that you were straddling his hips. "I want to watch your face while you take your pleasure from me, I want to watch that tight little cunt swallows my cock." he ordered, voice thick with lust.
You looked down at him, at his expectant face, at his hands gripping your thighs, and you felt a wave of exhaustion so profound it made your bones ache. "I do not know how," you whispered. "I do not know what to do."
"I will show you." His hands guided your hips, lifting you, positioning you over him. "Lower yourself. Slowly. Yes, like that. Gods, yes."
He lined his thick cock with your entrance and pushed your hips down. The fat head breached you again, stretching your swollen walls wide. A wet squelch filled the room as you sank onto him, his previous loads already leaking out around the intrusion. The new angle forced him deeper than before, the blunt tip grinding straight against your cervix and you gasped at the sensation. He began to move beneath you, thrusting up into you, and his hands guided your hips into a rhythm that matched his own.
"Good," he said, his eyes fixed on your face. "Good. You are learning.''
Each time you dropped down, his cock punched up to meet you, the wet slap of your soaked pussy against his pelvis loud and obscene. Your breasts bounced with every impact, nipples stiff and aching.
"Look at me," he growled. "Eyes on mine while you fuck yourself on my cock."
You met his gaze, cheeks burning, as he drove up harder. His hands slid to your ass, fingers digging in, spreading you wider so he could watch his shaft disappear inside you. "Say it," he demanded. "Tell me who this cunt belongs to." face was flushed, his eyes dark and intense, and there was something in his expression that made your stomach twist.
"Y-you," you gasped, the word breaking as another thrust knocked the air from your lungs.
"Louder."
"You! My cunt is yours!"
He snarled in approval and slammed upward, the brutal pace making your thighs shake. One hand left your ass to find your swollen clit, rubbing it in fast, rough circles while he fucked you from below. Your orgasm hit hard. Your pussy spasmed around him, pulsing and milking his shaft as fresh slick gushed out, mixing with the cum already inside you. You collapsed forward onto his chest, body jerking, but he kept thrusting up into your twitching hole, chasing his own release.
With a guttural groan he buried himself to the hilt and pumped another thick load deep into your womb. Hot spurts flooded you, forcing even more of the previous loads to squirt out around his shaft and run down his balls in sticky rivulets. He stayed buried inside you, grinding slow as the last pulses emptied, keeping you impaled and full.
You thought it was over. You thought surely, surely it must be over now.
But it was not over.
He took you twice more that night. The fourth time was on your side, your leg hooked over his hip, his mouth on your throat, his hands gripping your body with a possessiveness that left bruises. The fifth time, he woke you from a deep sleepâyou had finally drifted off, your body giving out from sheer exhaustionâand took you from behind again, roughly, quickly, with no gentleness at all.
By the end of it, the sky outside the window was beginning to lighten. The bells rang for dawn, and you heard them as if from very far away, as if you were underwater and the sounds of the world above were muffled and distorted.
You were lying on your back, staring at the canopy. Your body was a landscape of unfamiliar sensationsâsoreness and exhaustion and a strange, hollow ache that had nothing to do with the physical. Between your legs was wet and sticky and sore, and you could feel his seed leaking out of you, soaking into the sheets. There was blood too, you thought, though you had not looked. You did not want to look.
He was asleep beside you. Finally, mercifully, asleep. His arm was thrown across your waist, heavy and possessive even in unconsciousness, and his breath came in slow, even rhythms. You stared at the canopy. You stared at the ceiling. You stared at the fire burning low in the hearth, and you tried to make sense of what had happened.
This was marriage. This was what wives did. This was your duty.
Was this normal? You had no one you could ask. The only married woman you knew well was your mother, and your mother had spoken of the marriage bed in such vague, poetic terms that you had no way of comparing her experience to yours.
Perhaps it was always like this. Perhaps the first night was always overwhelming, always painful, always disorienting. Perhaps you would get used to it in time. Perhaps you would learn to find pleasure in itâhe had shown you that pleasure was possible, had coaxed it from your body even when you did not want to give it. Perhaps that was the key. Perhaps you just needed to learn.
You turned your head on the pillow and looked at him. Your husband. Lord Ormund Hightower, the man who had courted you so tenderly, who had written you such beautiful letters, who had made you feel like the most cherished woman in the world. In sleep, his face was relaxed, almost boyish, the lines of age and command softened by the grey morning light. He looked like a different man than the one who had taken you five times over the course of the night. He looked like the man you had fallen in love with.
His arm tightened around your waist, pulling you closer even in sleep. You felt his breath against your hair, warm and steady. You felt the heat of his body, the solid weight of him, the overwhelming reality of his presence.
Mine, you thought. He is mine now. And I am his.
The thought should have brought you comfort. It should have made you feel safe, protected, cherished. Instead, it made you feel something you could not name. Something that sat heavy in your chest like a stone.
You closed your eyes and tried to sleep. Your body was exhausted, wrung out, desperate for rest. But your mind would not quiet. It kept circling back to the same questions, the same confusions, the same half-formed doubts that you did not know how to examine.
Was it supposed to be like this?
Was this what love was?
You had no answers. You had only the grey morning light and the distant sound of bells and the weight of your husband's arm across your waist.
And the knowledge, slowly dawning in the back of your mind, that your life would never be the same again.
â
You woke to the feeling of lips on your neck. Soft and persistent. A mouth pressed to the curve where your shoulder met your throat, trailing slow, open mouthed kisses along the sensitive skin. You stirred from the depths of exhausted sleep, your mind foggy, your body heavy with a weariness that seemed to have seeped into your very bones.
For a moment, you did not remember where you were. The bed was too large, too soft, the pillows too many. The light filtering through the heavy curtains was grey and pale, early morning, the hour when the world was still half-asleep. The air smelled of sweat and sex and burned down candles, and beneath it all, the faint, musky scent of a man.
Ormund.
Your husband. He was behind you, his chest pressed to your back, his arm wrapped around your waist. His body was warmâalmost too warmâand you could feel the steady thrum of his heartbeat against your spine. His lips continued their exploration, moving from your neck to the curve of your ear, nibbling gently at the lobe. His breath was hot against your skin, and you felt the soft scrape of his teeth, barely there, a ghost of a bite that made you shiver.
"Good morning," he murmured, his voice rough with sleep and something else. Something darker. "I was beginning to think you would sleep through the entire day."
His hand moved from your waist, sliding up your stomach to cup your breast. His palm was warm, slightly calloused, and he cupped you with a tenderness that seemed at odds with the roughness of the night before. His thumb found your nipple and brushed across it in a slow, deliberate circle. The sensation was electric, a jolt that went straight to your core, and you gaspedâa small, involuntary sound that seemed to please him.
"You are so sensitive this morning," he said. "I like that. I like knowing that I am the first thing you feel when you wake."
His thumb continued its lazy circles, and you felt yourself responding despite everything. Your nipple hardened beneath his touch, pebbling against his palm. Your hips pressed back against him, between your thighs a pulse of heat bloomed, shameful and undeniable.
He noticed. Of course he noticed. His arm tightened around your waist, pulling you closer, and you felt the evidence of his own arousal pressing against the curve of your backside. He was hard again, thick and insistent, and the knowledge sent a fresh wave of heat through you.
"That is it," he whispered against your ear, his voice low and rough. "Your body remembers last night. It remembers what I taught you. It wants more, does it not?"
You shook your head weakly, even as your body betrayed you. "I am tired," you managed. "I did not sleep."
"Neither did I." His hand slid lower, over your stomach, his fingers splaying across your belly before moving down to the thatch of hair between your legs. "I lay awake for hours, watching you. You looked so peaceful. So beautiful. I wanted to wake you, but I did not. I let you rest."
His fingers found your center, parting your folds with practiced ease. You were wetâembarrassingly, shamefully wetâand he groaned softly when he felt it.
"Oh, sweet girl," he breathed. "You are so ready for me. Even after everything. Even after I kept you up all night. Your body knows what it wants."
His fingers moved in slow, gentle circles, tracing the outline of your most sensitive places. The sensation was overwhelmingâtoo much and not enough all at once. Your hips bucked against his hand, and you heard yourself whimper, a small, desperate sound that seemed to come from somewhere outside yourself.
"Ormund," you whispered. "Please. I am so tired."
"I know." He kissed your shoulder, your neck, the hinge of your jaw. "I know you are tired, sweet girl. I am not going to do anything you do not want. I only want to touch you. I only want to feel you. Is that all right?"
You should have said no. You should have told him to stop, to give you space, to let you breathe. But his fingers were moving in slow, gentle circles, and your body was betraying you, softening beneath his touch, your hips tilting to give him better access.
"That is not a no," he said. His voice was soft, almost playful. "That is a I do not know how to say yes because I am too shy. Am I right?"
You buried your face in the pillow, your cheeks burning. He laughed and kissed the back of your head.
"It is all right to want this," he said. "You are my wife. You are allowed to want your husband. There is no shame in it."
He rolled you onto your back gently, positioning himself above you. The weight of him was familiar now, the heat of his body pressing you into the mattress. But he did not push inside you. He only looked at you, his blue eyes soft, his curls tousled, his face relaxed in a way you had not seen before.
His hand came up to cup your cheek, his thumb tracing the curve of your cheekbone. He studied your face as though memorizing it, as though you were something precious and rare. His gaze moved from your eyes to your lips to the hollow of your throat, and you felt seen in a way that made your breath catch.
"Before you say anything," he said quietly, "I need to apologize to you."
You blinked up at him, confused.
"Last night," he continued. "I know I was... I know I got carried away. I promised you I would be gentle, and I was, at first. But then..." He exhaled slowly, his thumb still stroking your cheek. "It has been a long time for me, sweet girl, years since my wife died, years since I have laid with anyone. I had forgotten how overwhelming it could be. How consuming. The feel of you beneath me, the sound of your voice, the way your body responded to mineâI lost myself in it. I was too rough with you at times. I know I was. And I am sorry for that."
He leaned down and pressed his forehead to yours, his breath warm on your lips. His eyes were closed, his expression vulnerable in a way that made your heart ache despite everything.
"I did not mean to hurt you," he said. "You must believe that. I would never hurt you on purpose. You are my wife. You are the woman I have dreamed of for years. The last thing in this world I want is to cause you pain."
He took your hand and pressed it to his chest, over his heart. You felt it beating beneath your palm, steady and strong. His skin was warm, the hair on his chest soft against your fingers. You could feel the rise and fall of his breathing, the way it quickened slightly as you touched him.
"Can you forgive me for last night? For being too rough when I should have been more careful?"
You swallowed. Your throat was tight, your eyes stinging with something that might have been tears. You had not expected this. You had expected him to be pleased with himself, to preen and boast and make you feel small for your weakness. Instead, he was asking for forgiveness. He was acknowledging his fault. He was promising to do better.
"Yes," you whispered. "I forgive you."
His face broke into a smile, relieved and almost boyish. He leaned down and kissed your forehead, your eyelids, the tip of your nose. Each kiss was soft, lingering, as though he was trying to pour all his gratitude into the gesture.
"Thank you," he said. "You are so generous. So kind. I do not deserve you."
He kissed you then gently, the way he had kissed you at the altar. His lips moved against yours with a tenderness that made your chest ache. His hand cradled your jaw, tilting your head to deepen the kiss, and you felt yourself melting into him despite everything. His tongue traced your lower lip, asking permission, and you parted your lips for him, a small surrender that made him groan softly against your mouth.
When he pulled back, his eyes were dark with desire, but he did not push further. He only looked at you, his thumb stroking your jaw.
"It will get better," he said. "I promise you. The first time is always the hardest. But as you grow accustomed to me, as your body learns to welcome me, it will become easier. It will become pleasurable. And one day, you will wake up and you will want me. You will ache for me. You will not be able to imagine a morning without my hands on you."
His hand slid down your body, tracing the curve of your waist, the flare of your hip. His touch was reverent, almost worshipful, as though he was learning the geography of you by heart. His fingers trailed over your stomach, and you shivered at the sensation.
"I love the way you feel," he murmured. "So soft. So warm. So perfectly made for me."
He kissed your collarbone, then lower, his lips brushing the swell of your breast. His mouth was warm, his breath hot on your skin, and you felt yourself arching into him despite your exhaustion.
"I am going to be so good to you," he said against your skin. "I am going to take care of you. I am going to give you everything you deserve. You will never want for anything, sweet girl. Not while I draw breath."
His hand found your breast again, cupping it gently, his thumb circling your nipple. He lowered his head and took it into his mouth, and you gasped at the sensation, his tongue warm and wet, his lips soft, his teeth grazing just enough to send a jolt of pleasure through you. Your fingers tangled in his auburn curls, holding him there, and he made a sound of approval against your skin.
He moved to your other breast, giving it the same attention, and you felt yourself spiraling, the pleasure building despite everything. The pain of last night was still there, a dull ache between your thighs, but it was overshadowed now by the heat of his mouth, the tenderness of his hands.
When he finally lifted his head, his lips were red, his eyes dark. He looked at you with an expression that made your heart stutter.
"Beautiful," he said. "So beautiful."
He kissed you again, deep and slow, his tongue sweeping into your mouth as though he could taste your pleasure. His hand slid between your legs, finding you wet and ready, and he groaned against your lips.
"I want to make you feel good," he whispered. "I want to make you forget everything but me. Can I do that, sweet girl? Can I touch you? Make you come apart for me?"
You should have said no. You should have told him you were tired, that you needed rest, that you could not bear any more. But his fingers were stroking you, circling that sensitive place that made your vision blur, and the word that came out of your mouth was not no.
"Yes," you breathed. "Please."
He smiled and lowered his head to kiss your neck as his fingers continued their work. He was gentle, so gentle, nothing like the rough urgency of the night before. He took his time, building the pleasure slowly, watching your face as you gasped and moaned beneath him.
"That is it," he murmured. "Let go for me, sweet girl. I want to see you fall apart."
And you did. The pleasure built and built until you could not hold it back, and then you were crying out, your body arching off the bed, your nails digging into his shoulders. He held you through it, his fingers still moving, drawing out every last shiver of pleasure.
When you finally came down, you were trembling, your breath coming in short, ragged gasps. He kissed your forehead, your cheeks, the corner of your mouth.
"So perfect," he whispered. "So beautiful. I could watch you come apart forever."
He rolled you onto your side, pulling you against his chest, his arm wrapped around your waist. His hard length pressed against your backside, but he did not push inside you. He only held you, his lips pressed to your hair.
"Sleep now," he murmured. "I will hold you. I will keep you safe."
đŠđŹđşđť đđšđ°đŹđľđŤđş đŤđśđľâđť đ˛đľđśđť You go back to the summer cabin with your lifelong best friend Bucky Barnes and the tension youâve both ignored finally becomes impossible to deny. One charged night changes everything between you, no longer just best friends, but something irrevocably more.
alpha!bucky barnes x fem!omega!reader
word count : 17,9k
warnings 18+ : no use of y/n, childhood bestfriends to lovers, somnophilia, stealing intimate items for masturbation, bucky is a pervvv, dddne, guilt-ridden sexual acts, consuming bodily fluids without prior consent, unprotected sex, breeding, knotting, scenting, biting, pheromonal compulsion, heavy guilt and self-hatred while doing the wrong sexual acts, first heat/first rut happening (both late), a/b/o & possessive dynamics, fingering, virginity loss
authorâs note : first of all I just wanna say the BIGGEST thank you for 2k followers like what??? thatâs actually insane!!! please take this fic as a little gift from me to you <3 Iâm beyond grateful for every single one of you. and second of all⌠since centuries of rut kinda blew up (which still feels unreal), I decided to cook up another a/b/o bucky fic đŠđŠ
Old Polaroids still live in the glove compartment of Buckyâs truck, faded edges, corners curling from years of being handled, the plastic sleeves cracked from too many openings and closings.
Thereâs one of you at eight, gap-toothed and grinning wide, perched on his skinny shoulders while he pretends to stagger under your âenormousâ weight, both of you laughing so hard the photo is blurry.
Another from twelve: you braiding his too-long hair on the cabin porch steps, him scowling at the camera but letting you finish, the sun catching the brunette strands that always refused to stay tame.
A blurry one from sixteen: both of you asleep on the attic pull-out couch after a late-night movie marathon, your head tucked under his chin, his arm slung protectively around you like it was the most natural thing in the world. His mom took the picture quietly and slipped it into the stack later; neither of you ever mentioned it.
Everyone always said you were inseparable. Best friends. Practically siblings.
They never mentioned how his hand sometimes lingered a second too long when he helped you down from the dock, fingers brushing the back of your knee. They never mentioned how youâd catch yourself staring at the line of his jaw when he laughed, sharp, shadowed, the way it flexed when he was trying not to smile too big.
They never mentioned the quiet nights when the rest of the group had gone to bed and youâd stay up talking until the sky lightened, voices low, knees touching on the porch swing, the silence between sentences heavier than words.
Now youâre both twenty-two, back from sophomore year of college, still virgins, still waiting for that first presentation that everyone else got years ago.
Late bloomers, the doctors called it with clinical shrugs. Lucky, your mom called it with a wink, like it was a gift instead of a delay. You both just called it annoying. Friends had heats and ruts in high school, paired off, moved on. You and Bucky stayed the same, safe, platonic, untouched by the biology that rewrote everyone elseâs lives. Sometimes you wondered if it was a mercy or a curse.
This summer the families are caravanning to the cabin like always, the annual week of lake swims, bonfires and board games. But Bucky texted you last week, casual as ever.
Bucky 9:56am
Hey. Iâll drive you up early. Beat the traffic, set up the attic real quick, snag the good couch spot before anyone else tries to steal it. Just you and me, no rush, no chaos. Sound good?
Everyone thought it was sweet. Typical Bucky, looking out for you.
You didnât tell them how your stomach flipped when you read it.
The truck smells like motor oil, pine air freshener, and him, cedar, faint metal, something warm and smoky underneath that always made your head swim a little when you were close.
Windows down the whole way, old pop-punk blasting from speakers that crackle when the bass hits. You sing off-key on purpose just to make him laugh; he rolls his eyes but belts the chorus louder than you, voice rough from disuse but still carrying every note like muscle memory.
Halfway there the road narrows, trees thickening into proper forest, sunlight dappling the cracked windshield in shifting gold patterns. Itâs sticky, end-of-June hot so the AC is useless and the windows stay wide open. You kick off your sneakers, prop bare feet on the dash. He pretends to hate it, mutters something about fingerprints but never actually tells you to move them. Never has.
The playlist loops to that one song from high school, the one you used to scream-sing in his bedroom until his mom banged on the wall and threatened to unplug the stereo. You grin, unbuckle and before he can finish saying âdonât-â youâre already leaning halfway out the passenger window.
Arms spread like wings, hair whipping wild in the wind, you arch your back into the rush like youâre flying. The loose cropped tank stretches tight across your chest, wind molding it to every curve. No bra, too hot and itâs just Bucky. The hem flips up with a sudden gust, flashing the smooth underside of your breast, the soft curve where skin meets ribcage, glowing in the sun.
âJesus Christ!â Buckyâs voice cracks high, hand shooting out to fist the front of your denim shorts like youâre about to tumble onto the road. âYouâre gonna fall out! Get back in here!â
You laugh, loud and free over the rush of air, swinging your head side to side. âBuck, itâs fine! Just drive! Feels amazing- come on, live a little!â
He canât stop looking.
Knuckles white on the wheel, eyes flicking between the empty backroad and you: arched spine, wind-plastered tank, nipples pebbled from the breeze, that accidental strip of underboob. His throat works hard. Heat floods his face, then surges lower, cock twitching painfully against his zipper, sudden and insistent.
âFuck- okay, okay, just- get in before I crash us both,â he stutters, voice pitching like heâs sixteen again. âYouâre- Jesus, youâre killing me here.â
You duck back inside, cheeks flushed from wind and laughter, shirt falling back down but not before he steals one last glimpse. You flop against the seat, still grinning.
âWhat? Itâs hot. You used to let me do that all the time when we were younger.â
âYeah,â he mutters, shifting in his seat, trying to angle his hips away from view, âwhen you were eighteen and flat as a board.â He swallows hard. âNow youâre⌠youâre not.â
You blink at him, teasing edge softening. âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â
âNothing. Forget it.â He cranks the broken AC to full blast, praying the weak puff of cool air kills the throbbing erection before you notice.
You do notice, the fidgeting, the hand he keeps low on the wheel, the flush crawling up his neck to his ears.
âBuck?â Soft, teasing but gentle. âYou okay?â
âYeah. Fine. Just- roadâs bumpy.â He clears his throat twice. âDonât do that again unless you want me to drive us into a tree.â
You laugh again, crank the music louder, oblivious. Or pretending to be.
He spends the next twenty minutes white-knuckling the wheel, thighs clenched, reciting engine specs and batting averages under his breath to will the hardness away. It only half works.
Every glance sideways shows the faint outline of your nipples through the thin tank, the way your shorts ride high on your thighs, skin still flushed from the wind. And something else, your scent on the breeze, sweet and warm, just starting to bloom like honeysuckle after rain. His own scent sharpens without him noticing, cedar turning darker, smokier, edged with something desperate and metallic.
The cabin appears at the end of the dirt road, quiet and empty, families still hours away. Pine needles crunch under the tires as he parks.
You hop out first, stretch tall, arms overhead. The cropped tank rides up again, another flash of underboob, innocent and devastating in the late-afternoon light. Bucky stays in the driverâs seat an extra minute, head dropped to the wheel, breathing hard through his mouth, willing his body to calm down.
He tells himself itâs nothing. Just the heat. Just old habits. Just the cabin pulling old memories to the surface.
But deep in his gut, something ancient and hungry stirs for the first time, low, insistent, like a door creaking open after years of being locked.
That night the attic room feels smaller than ever. Shared pull-out couch, same as always, same faded quilt, same creak when you shift.
You toss and turn, low-grade fever creeping under your skin, making the sheets feel too heavy, too rough. Bucky lies rigid beside you, pretending to sleep, pretending he doesnât feel the air thickening between you, pretending he doesnât catch the faint, sweet shift in your scent every time you roll closer.
Pretending he doesnât already know whatâs coming.
Because he does.
Heâs felt it building for years, in stolen glances, in the way his pulse jumped when you hugged him goodbye before college, in the hoodie he never gave back because it still smelled like you. Heâs ignored it, buried it, told himself it was nothing.
But tonight, lying inches from you in the dark, the lie feels thinner than the quilt between you.
And something inside him is finally starting to crack.
The morning sun filters through the pine trees outside the cabin windows, casting long shadows across the worn wooden floors.
You wake up tangled in the sheets of the pull-out couch, the attic room still dim and stuffy from last nightâs humidity.
Buckyâs side of the bed is already empty, neatly made, like he couldnât sleep either. That low, nagging warmth in your belly lingers, a dull ache thatâs been building since the truck ride yesterday.
You blame it on the travel, the excitement, maybe even the greasy diner food you grabbed on the way up. Definitely not anything else. Not the way Buckyâs scent seemed to cling to the pillows, sharper than usual, making your skin feel too tight.
Downstairs, the cabin is alive with the familiar chaos of family vacation mornings. The coffee maker gurgles on the countrr, filling the air with the rich, bitter aroma of coffee. Bacon sizzles in a pan, popping and spitting grease while Buckyâs mom flips slices with a spatula, humming an old tune under her breath.
Your dad is at the table, newspaper spread wide, grumbling about the stock market even on break. Buckyâs sister, Becca, bounces in from the porch, her ponytail swinging, already in her swimsuit with a towel draped over her shoulders.
âItâs already pushing ninety out there,â Becca announces, grabbing a strip of bacon straight from the pan and dodging her momâs swat. âLake time before lunch? Come on, we canât waste this weather!â
Your mom laughs from the sink, rinsing berries. âIâm in. Just slather on the sunscreen, last year you all burned like lobsters.â
Everyone murmurs agreement, the energy shifting to that easy, vacation buzz. Buckyâs dad claps his hands together. âAlright troops, suits on, towels ready. Letâs make it happen.â
You feel a flush creep up your neck at the thought of changing. Itâs silly, youâve all done this a hundred times but something feels different this year. Maybe itâs college making you more self-conscious, or the way Bucky avoided eye contact last night when you both climbed into the shared bed, muttering ânightâ like it was a chore. You slip into the downstairs bathroom while the others scatter, locking the door with a soft click.
The swimsuit is nothing fancy: a simple navy two-piece from last summerâs clearance rack. High-waisted bottoms that hug your hips comfortably, a triangle top that ties at the neck and back, leaving just enough skin exposed to feel breezy but not exposed.
Youâve worn it to pool parties with college friends, no big deal. But here? With the families? With Bucky? Your reflection in the foggy mirror stares back, cheeks already pink. You tug the strings tighter, adjust the fabric and throw on a loose cover-up before stepping out.
The porch creaks under your flip-flops as you head down to the water, towel slung over your shoulder. The lake sparkles under the high sun, a mirror of blue sky and surrounding pines.
Buckyâs already there, knee-deep in the shallows, fiddling with the dock ladder like itâs the most important task in the world. Heâs in plain black trunks, fitted, riding low on his hips, the kind that show off the V of muscle from years of campus gym sessions. His back is to you at first, shoulders broad and tense, the faint scars from old accidents (or that one time he fell off the roof as a kid) catching the light.
He turns when he hears your footsteps on the gravel path. His gaze flicks over you, quick, almost dismissive then snaps away to the water. Then back. Slower this time, lingering on the hem of your cover-up where it brushes your thighs.
âUh⌠looks good,â he mutters, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand, the other still gripping the ladder like a lifeline. His voice is rougher than usual, like he swallowed wrong. âI mean- the suit. Itâs⌠new?â
You smile, trying to ignore the sudden flutter in your chest, the way his eyes keep darting back. âNot new. Just havenât worn it here before. You know, college pool parties and stuff.â
He nods, Adamâs apple bobbing. Doesnât meet your eyes fully. âRight. Cool. Yeah, makes sense.â
The awkwardness hangs for a second, thick as the humid air, before Becca cannonballs off the dock with a whoop, splashing everyone and breaking the tension. âLast one inâs a rotten egg!â
The group piles in with shouts and splashes, your parents wading slowly, Buckyâs dad doing an exaggerated belly flop that sends waves rippling. You and Bucky hang back at first, old habits dying hard. You slip off the cover-up, folding it neatly on a rock and wade in together. The water is shockingly cool against your heated skin, goosebumps prickling up your arms as it laps at your calves, then thighs, then waist.
It starts innocent enough, like every summer before. Bucky splashes you first, a light spray across your face. You retaliate with a full palm-skim, drenching his hair. He laughs, real and bright, grabbing your wrists to stop you. âOh, itâs on now!â
You twist free, diving under to escape, and the playfight escalates: him dunking you under when you least expect it, you jumping on his back to pull him down.
At one point, you climb onto his shoulders for an improvised chicken fight against Becca and her boyfriend, your thighs clamped around his neck, his hands steadying your calves. He stumbles on purpose, sending you both toppling in a tangle of limbs and laughter. Underwater, bubbles swirl around you, his body brushing yours in the chaos, chest to your back, his arm looping around your waist to pull you up.
You surface gasping, sides hurting from laughing. âTruce?â you wheeze, treading water close to him, faces inches apart.
âNever,â he says but heâs grinning, that real, boyish smile you havenât seen since high school, water dripping from his lashes. For a moment, itâs just you two, like kids again, the world narrowed to the lake and the sun on your skin.
But then you swim to the dock to climb out, needing a breather. Water streams off you in rivulets, the suit clinging like a second skin, dark fabric plastered transparent in places, nipples pebbled hard from the cold, every curve outlined unmistakably. You haul yourself up onto the warm wood, dripping puddles, and turn to call him over. âCome on, slowpoke! Race you to the cabin?â
Buckyâs still in the water. Staring.
Not subtle at all. Not even pretending anymore. His eyes trace a slow path: the line of your throat where water beads, down to your chest heaving from the swim, over the dip of your stomach, the way the wet bottoms hug your hips and thighs. His jaw flexes, lips parting slightly like heâs forgotten how to breathe. Color creeps up his neck and he dives under fast, disappearing beneath the murky surface as if trying to drown whatever thought just crossed his mind.
You sit on the edge of the dock, legs dangling in the water, pretending you didnât notice the heat in his gaze. But your skin prickles with awareness, a flush thatâs not just from the sun blooming across your chest. Whatâs his deal? you think, kicking your feet lazily. Itâs just a swimsuit. Just me.
He surfaces a minute later, hair slicked back dark and wet, breathing harder than the swim warrants. He shakes his head like a dog, sending droplets flying. âSorry,â he calls over, voice strained. âThought I saw a fish or something. Big one.â
You roll your eyes, smirking to hide the butterflies. âSmooth, Barnes. Real smooth.â
The group starts drifting toward lunch, parents complaining about hunger, Becca towing her boyfriend by the hand. âCome on, you two! Foodâs ready!â
You climb up from the dock, grab your towel from the rock and head up the shaded path to dry off. Behind a cluster of trees for a bit of privacy, you peel off the wet top and bottoms, modest enough with everyone else distracted. The air feels good on your bare skin for a second, cooling the persistent warmth in your core. You wrap the towel around yourself snugly and drape the suit over a flat rock in the sun to dry, bottoms folded neatly on top.
Bucky stays in the water longer than anyone, even after the others have toweled off and headed inside. When he finally emerges, heâs shivering despite the heat, arms crossed tight over his chest like heâs holding himself together. Water washes down his torso, catching in the faint trail of hair below his navel. He walks past the rock where your suit dries without looking at it or at least, thatâs what it seems. But you catch the twitch of his hand, the way his fingers flex as if debating.
You donât think much of it then. You head inside for lunch, sandwiches and cold lemonade around the big oak table, everyone talking over each other about plans for the afternoon hike or board games if it rains. Bucky joins late, hair still damp, in fresh shorts and a t-shirt that clings a little too much. He sits across from you, quiet, picking at his food. His knee bounces under the table. When your eyes meet, he looks away fast, muttering something about needing more mustard.
Later that afternoon, the cabin quiets down. Parents napping on the porch swing, gentle snores mingling with the hum of cicadas. Becca and her boyfriend head off for a hike, backpacks slung low. Youâre on the hammock out back, book open on your lap but not really reading, your mind keeps replaying the lake, Buckyâs stare, the accidental brushes underwater. That warmth in your belly flares again, insistent now, making you shift uncomfortably.
Thatâs when you hear it: the soft click of the downstairs bathroom door locking.
Inside, Bucky leans back against the sink, the cool porcelain a shock against his overheated skin. His heart slams so hard it echoes in his ears, a frantic drumbeat of shame and want.
Your bikini bottoms are balled tight in his fist, heâd snatched them from the rock when no one was looking, during the chaos of unpacking the cooler for lunch. His palm had brushed the damp fabric, and it was like electricity, heart in his throat the whole time, convinced someone would turn and see.
He shouldnât do this.
He knows he shouldnât.
Heâs done bad things before, stolen your hoodie from the laundry in college, buried his face in it that night until the scent faded. A hair tie from your backpack once, twisted around his wrist like a talisman. But this? This is new territory. Filthier. Wronger.
But the fabric is still damp from the lake, still warm somehow from your body and thereâs that faint trace of something new weaving through it, sweet, slick, almost honeyed. Your scent. Not the full bloom of heat yet but the first tentative leak, the prelude thatâs been teasing him since the truck ride, since last night in the attic when he lay awake listening to your soft breaths.
With shaking hands, he brings the bottoms to his face. Presses them to his nose. Inhales deep, slow, like he can pull you into his lungs.
âFuck,â he whispers, voice cracking on the word. âFuck, Iâm sorry. So goddamn sorry.â
The smell crashes over him like a wave, your skin, fresh lake water, sunscreen and that warm, needy undertone that twists something deep in his gut. His cock throbs instantly, straining painfully against his shorts. He shoves them down just enough with his free hand, wraps his fist around himself, already leaking, already desperate.
He strokes fast, too fast, jerky and guilty, the damp fabric still pressed to his mouth like a gag. âIâm so fucked up,â he breathes against the cloth, words muffled and wrecked. âYouâre right there⌠my best friend⌠and Iâm doing this⌠smelling you like some creep. Iâm sorry, Iâm so fucking sorryâŚâ
His hips jerk forward into his hand. He bites his lip hard to muffle the groan, tasting blood as he comes hard and sudden, spilling over his fist in hot, shameful pulses that leave him shaking. The bikini bottoms stay pressed to his face the whole time, soaking up the ragged sounds of his breathing, the quiet sob that slips out at the end.
When itâs over, he slumps against the wall, chest heaving, legs weak. Tears prick hot at the corners of his eyes, blurring the tile floor. What the hell is wrong with me? he thinks, staring at the fabric in his hand like itâs evidence. Sheâs outside reading, trusting me, and Iâm⌠this.
He cleans himself up with wads of toilet paper, hands still trembling. Wipes the bottoms as best he can with a damp cloth from the sink, careful, almost reverent, then unlocks the door and slips quietly back into the house.
The laundry pile is right there in the narrow hallway off the kitchen, a big overflowing basket of beach towels, damp swimsuits, and everyoneâs clothes from the day. No oneâs around; the house is still quiet, just the low hum of the fridge and the distant sound of crickets outside. He glances over his shoulder once, heart hammering then tucks your bikini bottoms underneath a folded beach towel near the bottom of the pile. Careful. Stealthy. Like nothing ever happened.
But as he walks back outside, the clawing shame doesnât fade. He can still taste the faint salt of lake water on his tongue. Still feel the phantom weight of your body against his in the water. Still hear his own broken apologies echoing in his head, meaningless now.
And somewhere under his skin, buried deep but stirring stronger, something darker is waking up, something primal that doesnât care about sorry, about best friends, about right and wrong.
Something that just wants more. And itâs only the first full day at the cabin.
The cabin quiets after dinner in stages, the familiar rhythms of family winding down like a clock ticking toward silence. First the clatter of dishes being stacked in the sink, silverware clinking against plates, the occasional laugh as someone recounts a story from the lake that day.
Then the low murmur of parents saying goodnight on the porch, chairs scraping as they stand, voices fading into the night like echoes. Finally, the creak of floorboards as everyone drifts to their rooms, doors clicking shut one by one, leaving only the hum of crickets and the distant lap of the lake against the shore.
The wind from earlier has died down completely, leaving the air thick and still, heavy with the scent of pine sap and cooling earth. You climb the narrow attic stairs alone, each step feeling heavier than it should, the wood groaning under your weight like itâs protesting the climb.
Your skin feels wrong, too tight, too hot, like someone turned the thermostat up inside your body and forgot to tell you. Sweat beads at the small of your back, even though the night has cooled outside. The low ache from earlier has spread, subtle and unrelenting, low in your belly, between your thighs, a persistent throb that makes every brush of fabric against your skin unbearable, electric.
You tell yourself itâs just the heat of the day lingering, just exhaustion from swimming and laughing and pretending everything is normal. Youâve had off days before, cramps, fevers, the kind that come and go without explanation. This is nothing new. Nothing to worry about.
You change into an old tank top and soft sleep shorts, loose, familiar, the same ones youâve worn in this room every summer since you could remember, faded from too many washes, the hem frayed from years of use.
The pull-out couch is already made up, sheets cool against your fevered skin when you slide in, but the relief is fleeting. You leave the small triangular window cracked, hoping the night air will help, a faint breeze whispering through the screen carrying the scent of water and woods. It doesnât. If anything, it makes the ache sharper, like the coolness is mocking the fire building inside you.
You curl onto your side, knees drawn up, trying to breathe through it. Deep inhales, slow exhales. But each breath pulls in the faint trace of Buckyâs scent from the pillows, cedar and something metallic, lingering from last night. It makes your head swim, the throb between your legs pulse harder. You press your thighs together, bite your lip to stifle a whimper. Just sleep, you think. Itâll be gone in the morning.
Downstairs, Bucky lingers in the kitchen longer than necessary. He rinses the last coffee mug under the faucet, watching the water swirl down the drain like itâs the most fascinating thing in the world. Then he wipes the counter twice, once with a sponge, once with a dish towel, scrubbing at invisible spots until his arms ache. Anything to delay going up those stairs. Anything to avoid the attic, the shared bed, you.
He can smell it already, your scent drifting down the stairs like smoke signals, sweet and syrupy, blooming stronger with every passing minute.
Itâs not the full force of heat yet, but itâs close. Close enough that his mouth waters involuntarily, his pulse hammers in his ears, his cock twitches traitorously in his sweatpants, half-hard just from the tease of it.
His own body betrays him too, the rut stirring low in his gut, a restless energy that makes his skin itch, his muscles tense like coiled springs. He grips the edge of the sink until his knuckles ache, staring at his reflection in the dark window above it.
Stay down here, he tells himself, voice a harsh whisper in his mind. Sleep on the couch. Pretend youâre drunk. Pretend you ate something bad. Pretend anything. But his feet move anyway, slow, deliberate, like theyâre not listening to him anymore. Up the stairs. Past the creaky third step heâs known since he was ten. To the attic door.
He pauses with his hand on the knob, ear pressed to the wood. Your breathing is uneven inside, shallow pants, soft whimpers youâre trying to muffle into the pillow. He can hear them. Smell them. Feel them in his bones, like a hook pulling him forward.
He opens the door.
The room is dim, lit only by the moonlight slicing through the triangular window, casting long shadows across the slanted ceiling. Youâre curled on your side, knees drawn up tight, arms wrapped around yourself like youâre trying to hold the heat in or keep it from escaping completely. Your hair sticks to your damp forehead in dark strands. Your scent hits him full force now, rich, needy, unmistakable, wrapping around him like a vise.
You donât look up right away, eyes squeezed shut against another wave of discomfort. âBuck?â Your voice is small, cracked, barely above a whisper.
âYeah.â He closes the door behind him softly. Locks it without thinking, the click echoing too loud in the quiet. âCouldnât sleep downstairs. Couch is lumpy.â
A weak laugh escapes you, more breath than sound. âLiar.â
He crosses the room in three steps, drops to sit on the edge of the mattress. The bed dips under his weight. You flinch at the sudden movement, then relax when you realize itâs him. Always him. His presence alone eases something in you, the ache dulls just a fraction, like his nearness is a balm.
âI can smell it,â he says quietly, no point in pretending anymore. âYour heat. Itâs⌠starting.â
You swallow hard, finally opening your eyes to meet his. Theyâre dark in the low light, pupils blown wide. âI know. I thought- I thought maybe it was just a fever. But itâs not going away. Itâs getting worse.â
He exhales through his nose, shaky and uneven. âMine too.â
Your eyes snap wider, searching his face. âYouâre-?â
âFirst rut.â He laughs once, bitter and self-conscious, running a hand through his hair. âFigures it would hit the same week. Same night. Same fucking attic. Like the universe has a sense of humor.â
Silence stretches between you, thick and electric, charged with everything unsaid over the years. The childhood friendship that never quite stayed innocent. The glances that lingered too long. The way you both always ended up here, in this room, pretending it was just tradition.
You shift slightly, wincing as the movement drags the sheet across your oversensitive skin, sending a fresh spark of need through you. âIt hurts,â you whisper, voice trembling. âNot bad yet, just⌠constant. Like Iâm burning from the inside out. Empty. I donât know how to make it stop.â
He nods, throat working visibly. He knows exactly what you mean, his own body feels like a live wire, every nerve singing with want, every breath pulling more of your scent into his lungs until heâs dizzy with it, until his rut claws at him from the inside, demanding more.
âI⌠I can help,â he says, voice rough around the edges, like the words are being dragged out of him. âWith the scent thing. If you want. It⌠calms it down. A little.â
You hesitate, brows furrowing. âScent thing?â
He rubs the back of his neck, cheeks flushing darker even in the dim light. Awkwardness rolls off him in waves, stammering, avoiding your eyes.
âYeah, uh⌠like, close contact. Nuzzling, or⌠licking the gland. Releases pheromones or something. Makes the heat less⌠frantic.â He pauses, swallowing hard. âI, um, overheard Mom talking to Becca last year. When her boyfriend was here during her heat. She said if things got too much, they could try scenting first. You know, to take the edge off without⌠without going all the way. Said itâs safer, especially for first times.â
The memory flashes through his mind unbidden: him paused outside Beccaâs door last summer, frozen when he heard his momâs voice inside, calm, matter-of-fact, explaining the basics like it was no big deal. âJust scenting, honey. It helps without complicating things.â Becca had groaned in embarrassment; her boyfriend had mumbled something awkward. Bucky had backed away fast, face burning but the idea stuck. Lingered. Especially when he thought about you.
You blink at him, processing. The suggestion hangs there, awkward and intimate, making the air feel even thicker. âOh. I⌠didnât know that was a thing.â Your voice is small, but curious. The ache pulses again, sharper, and you shift uncomfortably. âDoes it really help?â
He nods, still not meeting your eyes fully. âFrom what Iâve heard. Yeah. But only if youâre comfortable. I can⌠I can go back downstairs if-â
âNo.â The word slips out fast, desperate. âStay. Please. I trust you.â
He exhales, relief and tension mixing in his expression. âOkay. Yeah. Okay.â
He moves behind you slowly, careful not to startle, like youâre something fragile he might break. Slides under the sheet, spoons you from behind, chest pressing to your back, arm sliding around your waist, careful not to press too hard, not to let you feel how affected he already is. His nose finds the crook of your neck immediately, right over your scent gland. He inhales deep, greedy, a low rumble starting in his chest before he can stop it, instinctive, alpha-deep.
You sigh, body going liquid against him almost instantly. âThat⌠that feels better already.â
He nuzzles closer, lips brushing skin tentatively. âTell me if itâs too much. Or if I should stop.â
It isnât too much. Itâs exactly what you need.
He licks, slow, tentative at first, just the flat of his tongue over your gland, testing. You whimper, arching back into him without thinking, the sound pulling a groan from his throat.
He does it again, longer this time, wetter, tasting salt and sweetness and you. His arm tightens around your waist, pulling you flush. His hips press forward instinctively, the hard line of his cock nestling against your ass through thin layers of fabric.
You donât pull away. If anything, you press back, a soft moan escaping.
His scent floods the room in response, dark cedar, gunmetal, smoke, sharp and possessive, mingling with yours in a heady mix that makes the air feel drugged. It wraps around you like a blanket, heavy and warm, soothing the fire in your veins. Your eyelids grow heavy almost instantly, the frantic edge of your heat dulling under the weight of his presence. Safe. So safe. Protected.
But itâs not one-sided.
Even as your body melts, your own instincts stir, deep and shy, curious and innocent. You turn your head slowly, nose brushing the side of his jaw, then his neck.
His scent gland is right there, warm and pulsing. You nuzzle it tentatively, awkward and unsure, just mirroring what heâs doing. Your tongue darts out, small, hesitant licks against his skin, tasting cedar and metal and him. Itâs clumsy, inexperienced, your cheeks burning with embarrassment even as you do it.
You pull back a fraction, eyes wide and nervous. âIs⌠is that okay? I just- I thought⌠maybe it works both ways? Like⌠fairness?â
He nods frantically, eyes glassy, voice wrecked. âYeah. Yeah, itâs- more than okay. God. Keep going. Please.â
You do, awkward, innocent little licks along his gland, mirroring his rhythm. Your tongue is shy, tentative but every pass makes him tremble harder, hips jerking against you in tiny, helpless rocks. His scent deepens in response, smokier, more desperate and yours answers, sweetening, blooming brighter.
âFeels⌠weird,â you mumble against his skin, voice small and embarrassed. âGood weird. But I donât- I donât know what Iâm doing.â
âMe neither,â he admits, voice cracking. âNever done this. Never even- never even kissed anyone. Just you. Always you.â
You both blush harder at the confession, two virgins fumbling through instinct, through need, through trust.
He keeps licking your gland, slow and careful. You keep licking his, awkward, innocent, both of you trembling, both of you making soft, embarrassed noises every time your tongues brush skin.
Your eyelids grow heavier. The frantic edge of your heat dulls under the weight of his presence, his scent, his careful touches. Safe. So safe. Protected.
âBuckâŚâ you mumble, already slurring, the world softening at the edges.
âMmm?â He presses open-mouthed kisses along your neck now, teeth grazing but not biting, each one sending little sparks through you. âYou okay? Still good?â
âFeels⌠so goodâŚâ Your words trail off into a sigh. Breathing slows. Deepens.
He keeps going, slow, reverent drags of his tongue, soft purrs vibrating through his chest into your back, the sound rumbling like distant thunder. His hand splays wide over your stomach, thumb brushing just under the hem of your tank in soothing circles. Not groping. Just holding. Claiming in the gentlest way he knows how.
You sigh once more, soft, content, almost a purr of your own and slip under completely. Deep, scent-drunk sleep. The kind only an alphaâs presence can pull an omega into during a first heat.
Bucky freezes mid-lick, tongue still pressed to your skin.
He listens: your breathing even now, slow and peaceful. Completely out. Trusting. Vulnerable.
âOh fuck,â he breathes, the words barely audible. Horror and hunger twist together in his gut, sharp as knives.
He should stop. Pull away. Go sleep on the floor downstairs. Lock himself in the bathroom. Anything to put distance between you.
Instead, his hips rock forward, small, helpless, instinctive. The friction through his sweatpants is torture. Perfect torture. His cock throbs, already leaking, the rut demanding more now that heâs this close, this immersed in your scent.
âBabyâŚâ he whispers against your hair, voice wrecked. âNeed more. Just a little more. PleaseâŚâ
No answer. Of course not.
He whimpers, high, broken, needy, the sound pathetic even to his own ears. Presses his face harder into your neck, mouthing at your gland like he can drink the calm straight from your skin, like he can absorb the trust you gave him and somehow make this okay.
His hand slides lower, trembling, slips under the waistband of your shorts. Finds you soaked, swollen, clit throbbing even in sleep under his fingertips. He bites his own lip until it bleeds, copper tang grounding him for a second.
âJust gonna touch,â he tells your sleeping form, voice shaking with guilt and want. âWonât wake you. Promise. Iâm sorry- Iâm so sorryâŚâ
Fingers circle slow. Slick and careful, petting gently. Your hips twitch once, unconscious little rock and he groans low, wrecked, forehead dropping to your shoulder.
âSo wet for me,â he mumbles, words slurred against your skin. âEven when youâre dreaming. Fuck- you want it too, donât you? Say yes. Please just- say yes even if youâre asleep-â
He grinds against you harder now, shallow thrusts through fabric, cock leaking steadily, making a mess of his sweatpants. His fingers speed up, just a little, rubbing tight circles over your clit while he ruts like a desperate teenager, hips snapping with less control.
The guilt is screaming in his head, louder than before. Sheâs asleep. She trusts you. Youâre disgusting. Stop. Stopstopstop- Flashbacks hit him, stealing your hoodie in college, jerking off with it pressed to his face that night; the swimsuit bottoms from today, still damp in his memory; the way heâs always been like this, wanting you in secret, hating himself for it. Best friend. Sheâs your best friend. What kind of monster are you?
But his body doesnât listen. The rut doesnât care about guilt or friendship or years of restraint.
He comes with a choked sob, muffled against your neck, hot pulses soaking the front of his sweatpants, hips jerking hard against you in frantic, uneven thrusts. He shakes through it, whole body trembling, fingers still moving on you until he feels the tiny flutter of your body coming too, soft, dreamy, barely-there orgasm that leaves you sighing and nestling closer even in sleep, like your subconscious knows itâs him and wants more.
He pants against your hair, hot tears stinging his eyes now. Heart hammering like itâs trying to escape his chest.
Slowly, carefully he withdraws his hand. Wipes it on his ruined pants with a grimace. Pulls the blanket higher over both of you, tucking it around your shoulders like that can make up for what heâs done.
You donât stir. Peaceful. Claimed.
He presses the softest kiss to the back of your neck, right over where heâs been licking for what feels like hours, the skin glistening faintly in the moonlight.
âLove you,â he whispers, voice cracked and raw. âSo fucking much. Iâm sorry. Iâll make it right. Somehow.â
He curls tighter around you. Still hard. Still aching, the rut not satisfied with just this. But calmer now, at least for the moment.
You sleep on, safe, claimed by scent, marked in the only way heâll allow himself tonight.
Buckyâs chest heaves in the aftermath, each breath a ragged pull that does nothing to steady him, his heart slamming against his ribs like it's trying to escape the prison of his body. His sweatpants are ruined, sticky, cooling uncomfortably against his thighs but the rut doesn't care about discomfort.
Itâs not done. Not even close. His cock twitches weakly, already stirring again, the alpha instinct roaring back to life with a vengeance that makes his hands shake. He can feel the knot forming at the base, swollen and insistent, even though he hasnât pushed inside you yet. The thought alone sends a fresh wave of shame crashing over him, hot, choking, familiar.
He lies there for what feels like an eternity, arm still draped over your waist, fingers splayed possessively across your stomach. The warmth of your skin seeps through the thin tank, grounding him and torturing him in equal measure.
Get up, he thinks desperately, go splash water on your face, sleep on the goddamn floor downstairs. Lock yourself in the bathroom until morning.
But your scent curls around him like smoke from a dying fire, sweet and cloying, seeping into his pores until his mouth waters again, until his vision blurs at the edges. The alpha in him stirs, primal and unyielding, whispering that this is right, that youâre his to claim, to take, to mark in every way possible. The man in him, the virgin whoâs never even kissed anyone properly, the one whoâs been your best friend since scraped knees and shared secrets, screams back: She's asleep. She's vulnerable. She's your best fucking friend. This isn't you.
Memories flood him unbidden, adding layers to the torment: the first time he realized his feelings weren't just friendly, that summer you turned eighteen and wore that sundress to the bonfire, the fabric fluttering in the breeze; the way heâd excused himself early, locked in the bathroom downstairs, hand around his cock imagining it was you.
Or college last year, when you sent a selfie in a new outfit and heâd saved it, stared at it in the dark until he came with guilt choking him. Small thefts building to this, hoodies, hair ties, now swimsuits. How did I get here? he wonders, tears already pricking at his eyes. When did I become this?
His hand, still trembling from the first release, slides back down, like his body is on autopilot. Between your thighs again, where youâre even wetter now, your body betraying you in sleep, slick pooling from the earlier touches, from his scent blanketing you like a possessive shroud.
The heat is building in you too, he can feel it, the way your inner walls flutter faintly at his proximity, instinct responding to alpha even in dreams. He scoops, fingers dipping shallow at first, collecting the warm, sticky essence that coats you. They come away glistening in the dim light, strands of your arousal stretching between them like liquid silk, sweet and golden like honey.
He stares at his own hand, breath hitching sharp in his throat. The sight is hypnotic, proof of your need, even unconscious, and it breaks something in him. This is real, he thinks. Not a fantasy. Not stolen fabric. You.
âIâm sorry,â he whispers, voice breaking on the words as he lifts his fingers to his mouth, slow and clumsy, like heâs afraid to taste but canât stop himself. The first taste is lightning, sweet, tangy, pure you, like warm honey on his tongue, exploding across his senses.
A broken whine rips from his throat, high and needy, echoing too loud in the quiet room, he clamps his free hand over his mouth to muffle it, eyes squeezing shut. But he doesnât stop. He sucks them deeper, tongue swirling awkwardly, cheeks hollowing as he chases every trace, every drop. âF-Fuck- fuck, you taste like⌠like honey⌠so sweet⌠so good⌠how are you this perfect? Even asleep, youâre dripping for me⌠like⌠like you were made for thisâŚâ
His hips grind forward instinctively, clumsy and desperate, pressing the renewed hardness against your ass. The friction is messy, awkward, his sweatpants bunching, his movements jerky like he doesnât know what heâs doing (because he doesnât).
He pulls his fingers free with a wet pop, stares at them again, clean now, but the flavor lingers on his tongue, addictive and haunting. âIâm a monster,â he mutters, tears pricking hot at his eyes, blurring his vision. âTasting you like this. Stealing it while you sleep. You have no idea- god, if you woke up now⌠saw me like this⌠youâd hate meâŚâ
He dips again, deeper this time, fingers curling just inside, scooping more slick with a clumsy, fumbling motion that makes his own breath hitch. Your body clenches faintly around him, unconscious and soft, a tiny ripple that pulls a guttural, embarrassed groan from deep in his chest.
âS-See that? Even dreaming, youâre gripping me⌠pulling me in⌠like you know itâs me⌠like your body wants me to⌠toâŚâ He shoves the fingers back into his mouth, sucking harder, sloppier now, the wet sounds obscene in the silence, echoing off the slanted walls. His free hand fists the sheet beside you, knuckles straining white, nails digging into the fabric like it can anchor him.
âBeen perving on you for years⌠that red swimsuit summer- f-fuck, it rode up every time you moved⌠showed everything⌠jerked off in the shower thinking about peeling it off you⌠tasting you then⌠stole your bottoms today, you know that? Locked myself in the bathroom, buried my face in them like a dog in heat⌠came so hard I saw stars, whispering your name⌠and now- now Iâm here, licking your slick off my fingers, rutting against you like I canât control myself⌠because I canât⌠Iâm disgusting, baby⌠so sorry- love you-hate myself- canât stop- been holding back forever, but the rut⌠itâs breaking meâŚâ
Memories surface, adding depth to the spiral: the time in high school when you cried on his shoulder after a bad date, and heâd held you too tight, inhaling your scent until he was dizzy; the college care package you sent with a note that smelled like your perfume, and heâd kept it under his pillow for weeks. Small sins building to this avalanche. âYou think Iâm the good guy,â he chokes out around his fingers. âThe best friend who protects you. But Iâm not. Iâm this. Always have been.â
His hips rut faster, grinding in earnest now, the earlier mess making everything slick and hot, friction building to a fever pitch that makes his vision tunnel.
Tears spill over, tracking down his cheeks as he licks his fingers clean one last time, savoring the taste like itâs his last meal, like tomorrow everything ends. âYouâd hate me. Wake up and see the creep Iâve always been, the way Iâve watched you, wanted you. But f-fuck- fuck, I need you. Love you so much itâs killing me. Thatâs why, thatâs why Iâm like this. Need to be closer. Need to taste- need to have every part of you before you find out and leave.â
He comes again, sudden and shattering, hips slamming forward with a strangled, sobbing cry muffled into the crook of your neck, teeth grazing your skin but not biting.
Hot pulses flood his pants anew, body convulsing in waves, every muscle locking tight as the release rips through him like wildfire. He shakes like heâs breaking apart, sobs wracking his frame, tears soaking into your hair and the pillow beneath.
When the aftershocks finally go, leaving him hollowed out and trembling, he slumps heavy against you, panting harsh and broken. The guilt crashes in full force now, unfiltered by the rutâs haze, ugly, clawing, leaving him raw and exposed.
âOh god,â he sobs quietly, face buried in your hair, inhaling the clean shampoo scent mixed with your heat like itâs a lifeline. âWhat did I do? What the fuck did I just do? Iâm sorry- Iâm so sorry- how do I fix this?â
Carefully, oh so carefully, like handling something sacred and fragile, he shifts just enough to reach for the corner of the blanket. Dips it between your thighs, wiping you clean with gentle, trembling strokes, his touch feather-light, reverent. He smooths your shorts back into place with utmost care, tucks the sheet around you snugly to keep you warm, brushes damp strands of hair from your forehead with feather-light touches, lingering on your cheek like he can wipe away his sins. His tears fall freely now, silent and hot, dripping onto your shoulder, soaking into the fabric of your tank.
âIâm gonna tell you,â he whispers into your hair, voice thick and wrecked, nose pressed to the spot he scented earlier, the skin still warm and marked by his earlier licks.
âTomorrow. First thing in the morning. Confess everything- the hoodie from college that I never gave back, the swimsuit bottoms I stole today and ruined with my come, the way Iâve wanted you forever, watched you in secret, loved you in ways I shouldnât. This night. All of it- the touching, the tasting, the grinding like a desperate animal. Beg you to forgive me. Or hate me. Kick me out of your life forever. Whatever you need, Iâll take it. I canât keep this secret anymore. Canât keep hurting you like this, pretending Iâm just your friend when Iâm⌠this. Love you too much- too much to lie. Please⌠please donât hate me. But if you do, I deserve it.â
He holds you closer, body curled protectively around yours, as if he can shield you from himself, from the truth waiting in the dawn. The rut simmers low still, a distant hum waiting to reignite with the morning light, but for now, exhaustion pulls at him like an undertow. Sleep creeps in against his will, tears drying stiff on his cheeks, his promises echoing in his mind like fragile vows.
The attic is a furnace of heat and scent, the air so thick it feels like breathing through honey. Bucky had tried to sleep, really tried. Heâd even drifted off for a little while, exhaustion finally pulling him under after the first round of guilt and need burned itself out. But now heâs awake again, jolted back by the insistent, aching throb between his legs, cock hard and heavy against your ass, leaking steadily through the ruined fabric of his sweatpants. His cock is pulsing with every heartbeat, refusing to let him rest.
His arm is still locked around your waist, fingers splayed across your stomach like heâs afraid youâll disappear if he lets go, even in sleep. Every shallow breath you take drags more of your blooming heat into his lungs until heâs dizzy with it all over again. He shifts just slightly, trying to ease the pressure, but the movement only makes him groan low in his throat, hips rocking forward on instinct, pressing himself tighter against you.
He still feels like a monster.
But the rut doesnât care about guilt. It only cares about claim.
His hand trembles as it slides down again, hooking the waistband of your sleep shorts with reverent care. He tugs them aside slowly, agonizingly slow so the fabric drags over your hips, cool air kissing newly bared skin. You donât stir. Just sigh, soft and trusting, shifting closer like your body knows exactly whoâs touching you even in sleep. The shorts catch briefly on the curve of your ass; he freezes, heart slamming, fumbles them lower until theyâre bunched at your thighs.
He stares for a long moment, breath hitching at the sight of you: soft, bare, glistening in the moonlight from earlier touches and the steady leak of your heat. His mouth waters. His cock jerks against his stomach.
âIâm sorry,â he breathes, voice cracking as he lines himself up. The tip nudges your entrance, slick, hot, ready. Heâs shaking so badly the head slips once, twice, smearing wetness along your folds. A broken whine tears from his throat, high, helpless, muffled against your shoulder. âIâm so sorry⌠I canât stop⌠canât-â
He presses forward, inch by torturous inch, slow and clumsy, fumbling like heâs never done this before (because he hasnât). Your virgin pussy resists, tight, so impossibly tight, clenching instinctively against the intrusion, pushing back like it doesnât know whether to let him in or keep him out. He gasps, hips stuttering, tears already welling up again.
âF-Fuck- baby, youâre so⌠so tightâŚâ he whimpers, voice small and shaking, almost baby-like in its desperation. âIâm sorry⌠Iâm trying to be gentle⌠I donât wanna hurt you⌠youâre so warm⌠so fucking warm⌠feels like coming home⌠Iâm disgusting⌠shouldnât be doing this⌠shouldnât be taking you while you sleepâŚâ
He pauses, breathing hard against your neck, tears dripping onto your shoulder. His tip is barely inside, your walls fluttering and squeezing, resisting every tiny push. He sniffles, voice cracking even more.
âCâmon, sweet girl⌠itâs just me⌠you know me, baby⌠itâs Bucky⌠just Bucky⌠open up for me, honey⌠please⌠let me in⌠Iâll be so gentle⌠promise⌠youâre so tight⌠so perfect⌠like you were waiting for meâŚâ
He rocks forward again, tiny, careful little movements, coaxing, pleading with your body like itâs a shy thing heâs trying to befriend. Your walls flutter, then slowly, sweetly, start to soften, parting just enough, letting him sink another inch. He whimpers, high and relieved.
âThere you go⌠good girl⌠thatâs it⌠just like that⌠you know me⌠you trust me⌠let Bucky in, baby⌠pleaseâŚâ
Another slow push, your pussy yields a little more, gripping him so tight he has to bite his lip to keep from crying out. Tears stream down his face now, mixing guilt and awe and overwhelming love.
âSo good⌠so sweet⌠like honey⌠fuck, youâre letting me in⌠youâre so tight⌠so warm⌠feels like home⌠Iâm sorry⌠I love you⌠love you so muchâŚâ
He bottoms out, hips flush against your ass, buried to the hilt and nearly blacks out from the sensation. Youâre molten around him, slick dripping down his balls, every tiny shift of your body gripping him like velvet. He stays still for a long moment, panting against your neck, trying to breathe through the overwhelming fullness, the guilt clawing at his chest like talons.
Then he moves.
Slow. Clumsy. Deep, dragging strokes that pull whimpers from his own throat with every pass. Heâs whining, high, pathetic little sounds he canât swallow back as he fucks into you with careful, fumbling thrusts, like heâs worshiping something holy and terrified of breaking it.
âCanât stop,â he whispers, voice wrecked and whiny. âCanât- fuck- canât stop. You feel too good. Too right. Iâm sorry⌠Iâm so fucking sorry⌠been wanting this for years⌠watching you, stealing pieces of you⌠hoodie, swimsuit, now this⌠Iâm disgusting⌠pervy little creep⌠but youâre mine⌠feel like mineâŚâ
He angles his hips, awkward at first, fumbling, grinding deeper, the head of his cock dragging against that spot inside you that makes your body flutter even in sleep. A soft, unconscious moan slips from your lips. He freezes, terror and lust warring in his chest then groans when you clench around him again, instinctive and needy.
âSee that?â he mumbles, voice cracking. âEven dreaming youâre pulling me in⌠like you want it⌠want me⌠fuck, Iâm gonna knot you⌠gonna lock inside⌠fill you up⌠mark you as mine⌠Iâm disgusting⌠shouldnât⌠but I need- need it so badâŚâ
The knot begins to swell at the base, thickening with every clumsy thrust, catching at your entrance on the out-stroke, stretching you wider. Heâs whining louder now, high, desperate little sounds he canât swallow back, hips stuttering as the pressure builds to something unbearable.
âGonna knot you,â he gasps against your ear, tears falling faster, soaking your hair and shoulder. âGonna lock inside⌠fill you up⌠make you mine⌠Iâm disgusting⌠shouldnât⌠but I canât stop⌠love you⌠love you so much it hurts⌠need you to be mineâŚâ
One last deep, clumsy thrust.
The knot catches.
Swells.
Locks.
Hot, pulsing fullness stretching you open as it seals inside, tying you together. A broken sob rips from him, half relief, half shame as the first thick spurt of come floods you, wave after wave, so much it leaks out around where youâre stretched tight around him. His whole body convulses, hips jerking in tiny, helpless pulses as he empties inside you, tears streaming freely down his face.
And thatâs when your eyes flutter open.
A soft, dazed sound slips from your lips, half moan, half sigh as awareness returns in hazy pieces: the overwhelming fullness deep inside, the heat of his body wrapped around yours, the rhythmic pulsing of his knot, the wet mess between your thighs, his tears on your skin, the broken way heâs clinging to you.
Your gaze finds his in the moonlight, wide, sleepy, pupils blown with lingering heat-drunk haze, no shock, just soft, instinct-led trust.
âBuckyâŚ?â
He freezes, entire body locking up, knot throbbing helplessly inside you, tears still streaming down his face, voice shattered when he finally speaks.
âIâm sorry,â he chokes out, barely audible, shaking so hard the knot tugs inside you. âIâm so fucking sorry- I couldnât- I shouldnât have- please donât hate me- please- Iâm disgusting- I know Iâm disgusting-â
Your breath hitches, but itâs not fear, itâs need. The heat is still thinking for you, instincts purring in your veins, making everything feel right, warm, necessary.
You reach back slowly, fingers finding the nape of his neck, pulling him closer with sleepy, trusting gentleness.
âShhh,â you whisper, voice thick with sleep and honey-sweet heat. âItâs okay⌠feels so good⌠so full⌠BuckâŚâ
He whimpers, fresh tears soaking your skin as he clings tighter.
You clench around the knot deliberately, slow and sweet, drawing a wrecked, whiny sound from deep in his chest.
âMoreâŚâ you mumble sleepily, voice soft and slurred, pure instinct speaking. âBucky⌠please⌠more⌠feels so warm⌠so right⌠donât stopâŚâ
He buries his face in your neck, shaking harder, sobbing quietly against your skin.
âLove you,â he whispers, over and over, voice raw and broken. âLove you⌠love you⌠thank you⌠Iâm sorry⌠Iâm so sorryâŚâ
You sigh and settle back against him, letting his knot hold you together, mumbling sleepily against his hair.
âMore⌠Buck⌠please⌠feels so full⌠so good⌠keep goingâŚâ
He whimpers again, high, helpless, overwhelmed and rocks gently, tiny movements that make you both sigh in perfect harmony.
Finally crossing the line together, clumsy, guilty, innocent and so in love it hurts.
The knot keeps you locked together for what feels like an eternity, throbbing, pulsing, a steady heartbeat buried deep inside you that matches the frantic, unsteady rhythm of his against your back. The attic has grown still, the earlier frenzy burned down to embers. Outside, the lake laps softly at the shore, a distant, soothing metronome.
Inside, thereâs only the quiet rasp of your breathing, the occasional creak of the old pull-out couch beneath your combined weight, and the faint rustle of sheets whenever one of you shifts. Moonlight has slid across the slanted ceiling, painting long silver stripes over the rumpled quilt and your tangled limbs, his arm banded low across your stomach, your legs entwined with his, bodies fitted together like pieces that have finally found their match.
Buckyâs face is still buried in the crook of your neck, nose pressed to the spot just over your scent gland, breathing you in like heâs afraid the scent will disappear if he stops. His tears dried long ago into faint salt tracks on your skin, but he hasnât let go.
Not even an inch.
His breathing is ragged, uneven, aftershocks still rolling through him, guilt and awe warring in his chest like twin storms. Heâs trembling harder now, not just from the bond or the knot, but from something deeper, something primal starting to uncoil inside him, raw and hungry, the alpha side heâs never let out before clawing its way up. It makes his fingers twitch against your skin, makes his hips give tiny, helpless rocks even though heâs trying so hard to stay still.
Youâre both shaking a little: him from the raw vulnerability of what heâs done and the overwhelming relief that you havenât pulled away; you from the lingering fullness, the slow, hazy return to reality after everything that just happened. Youâre still so sweet, so pure, like warm honey in his arms, even after the mess, the tears, the guilt. Your scent is everywhere, soft, golden, comforting and itâs making that new, primal thing inside him growl quietly, wanting to claim, to keep, to never let go.
You clench around the knot once, instinctive, testing the connection and he whines, high and broken, hips jerking involuntarily, tugging the knot tighter inside you. His fingers dig into your hip, not hard, just desperate, like heâs afraid heâll float away if he doesnât hold on.
âF-Fuck- baby, donât-â His voice cracks, raw and wrecked, still so awkward. âDonât do that unless you want me to⌠to lose it again⌠Iâm already- god, Iâm barely holding on⌠Iâve never⌠never felt anything like thisâŚâ
You smile into the dark, small and sleepy, voice still thick with the afterglow, sweet like you always are. âMaybe I do.â
He exhales a shaky laugh against your throat, the sound half sob, half wonder, still so boyish, so unsure. âYouâre gonna kill me. Swear to god, youâre gonna kill me and Iâll die happy⌠Iâve never⌠never even kissed anyone properly before tonight⌠and now⌠now Iâm inside you⌠knotted⌠bonded⌠I donât even know what Iâm doingâŚâ
Silence settles again, comfortable now, softer than anything that came before. His hand slides up your side in slow, reverent strokes, fingers tracing the curve of your ribs, the dip of your waist, like heâs mapping territory heâs only dreamed of touching. Heâs clumsy about it, fingers trembling, hesitating every few inches like heâs scared heâll do it wrong but so gentle, so careful.
When he speaks again, his voice is quieter, almost hesitant, the words dragged from somewhere deep and carefully guarded.
âDo you remember⌠the summer we were seventeen?â he murmurs, lips brushing your neck as he talks, voice cracking a little. âYou had that stupid crush on Jake from the lake house next door. Came crying to me because he kissed some girl at the bonfire instead of you.â
You huff a soft laugh, the sound vibrating through both of you where youâre joined. âI remember. I was so dramatic. Thought the world was ending. Sat on the dock sobbing into my hoodie sleeves like it was the apocalypse.â
âYou were sitting there, knees up, tears everywhere. I sat next to you for hours. Didnât say much. Just⌠let you lean on me.â His thumb brushes slow circles over your hip bone, grounding himself in the feel of you. âThat was the first time I realized I wanted to be the one kissing you. Not Jake. Me. I hated myself for thinking it. You were crying over some idiot and I was imagining pulling you into my lap, wiping your tears, fixing everything with my mouth. Thought I was the worst friend alive for even picturing it.â
Your breath catches. âYou never told me.â
âCouldnât.â He swallows hard, Adamâs apple bobbing against your shoulder. âEvery summer after that⌠every time you fell asleep on my shoulder during movie nights in the living room, every time you hugged me goodbye before you left for college⌠Iâd go home and jerk off thinking about you. Your laugh. The way your hair smelled after swimming, chlorine and sunscreen and something sweet underneath. That red swimsuit you wore, the way it rode up every time you dove in. The way you looked at me sometimes, like maybe you felt it too, like maybe I wasnât crazy. Iâd come so hard Iâd see stars, whispering your name into my pillow like a prayer, then hate myself for days. Thought I was ruining everything. Thought if you ever found out how much I wanted you, youâd never look at me the same.â
Tears prick your eyes now, hot and sudden. âBuckâŚâ
âI was terrified,â he admits, voice barely above a whisper, cracking on the last word. âTerrified of ruining the friendship. You were the only person who ever really saw me, scraped knees, bad moods, nightmares after my dad yelled too loud, all of it and I couldnât lose that. You were safe. You were home. So I buried it. Deep. Stole pieces of you instead, hoodies left on my floor after movie nights, hair ties from your bag, that swimsuit today. Kept them like secrets. Like proof you were mine even if you didnât know it. Like proof I could have you in some small, fucked-up way without breaking everything.â
He presses a trembling kiss to your scent gland, soft, reverent, like heâs apologizing to it too. âIâm still terrified. Even now. Even with my knot inside you⌠with your slick on my tongue⌠with the bond humming between us. Scared youâll wake up fully tomorrow and realize what a creep Iâve been. That youâll see all the times I watched you too long, all the nights I came thinking about you while you slept in the next room, all the ways Iâve taken pieces of you without asking. Scared youâll leave. And I wouldnât even blame you.â
You turn your head just enough to brush your lips against his jaw, tasting salt from his dried tears. âIâm here,â you whisper, voice steady despite the emotion thickening your throat. âIâm not leaving. Iâve been scared too- scared of saying anything, scared of losing you if I did. But Iâm here. I want this. I want you.â
He lets out a shaky breath, relief and longing mixing in his chest. His hand comes up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing the corner of your mouth and tracing your lips like heâs trying to remember them. Heâs clumsy and hesitant, as if heâs afraid he might ruin the moment.
âCan IâŚ?â His voice cracks, barely audible. âCan I bite you? Make it real? Make you mine forever? I need to feel the bond snap. Need to know itâs forever. If youâll let me.â
Your heart stutters. The question hangs between you, heavy, sacred, irreversible. You feel the knot pulse inside you, feel his heartbeat against your back, feel the raw hope and fear in his voice.
You nod slowly, eyes locked on his in the moonlight, tears shimmering in your own.
âYes.â
He inhales sharply, like the word punched the air out of him. His hand moves to the back of your neck, cradling you gently as he tilts your head to the side, fingers shaking, like heâs terrified of hurting you. His lips brush your scent gland, soft, reverent kisses first, then slow drags of his tongue, tasting the salt of your skin, the sweetness of your heat still clinging to you.
âI love you,â he whispers against the spot, voice trembling. âAlways have. Always will. No matter what happens tomorrow. No matter what you decide. I love you.â
He hesitates, nose brushing your skin, breathing shaky. âIs⌠is it gonna hurt?â you ask softly, voice small and nervous, sweet like honey even in your uncertainty. âThe biteâŚ?â
He freezes, eyes wide, suddenly looking so young, so unsure. âI⌠I dunno, baby,â he admits, voice cracking. âIâve never⌠never done this before. I donât wanna hurt you. Youâll tell me if it does, okay? Promise youâll tell me and Iâll stop. I swear.â
You nod, trusting, sweet. âOkay. I trust you.â
He exhales shakily, presses one more soft kiss to your gland, then bites.
Teeth sink in, sharp, claiming, but so careful itâs almost too light at first. He hesitates again, whimpering against your skin, then presses deeper, fumbling, a tiny sob escaping him as he finally sinks in properly. Pain flares bright and hot for a split second, then explodes into white-hot pleasure as the bond snaps fully into place, stronger this time, like a circuit completing, like a key turning all the way in a lock thatâs always belonged to him. The world narrows to the point of contact, to the pulse of his knot inside you, to the way his come keeps filling you in slow, endless waves, to the electric hum of the bond blooming between you, threading through every nerve, every heartbeat.
You come again, soft, rolling, dreamy, clenching around his knot in fluttering pulses that milk him deeper, drawing another broken moan from his throat. Your vision whites out for a moment, pleasure crashing through you in gentle waves, every nerve singing with the new connection, the certainty of him. You feel him everywhere, his heartbeat, his fear, his love, his awe all of it pouring into you through the bond like warm sunlight.
He licks over the freshened mark, slow soothing laps, sealing it with his tongue, his scent, his everything. His hips rock in tiny, helpless movements, riding out the aftershocks with you, knot pulsing in time with your fluttering walls. Heâs whimpering the whole time, soft, needy little sounds, still so cute, still so overwhelmed.
âMine,â he whispers, voice wrecked and reverent, nose pressed to the bite, inhaling deeply like he can draw the bond itself into his lungs.
You reach back, fingers threading through his hair, pulling him closer until his forehead rests against yours.
âYours,â you breathe, voice soft and sure, sweet like honey even now.
He exhales and curls tighter around you, knot still locked, heart hammering against your back in perfect sync with yours.
The attic is quiet again.
But the silence feels different now.
It feels like home.
The knot finally begins to deflate as the first pale light of dawn creeps through the triangular attic window, turning the room soft gray and gold. Itâs slow, agonizingly slow, each pulse weaker than the last until the thick swell eases enough for Bucky to shift without tugging painfully. You both feel it at the same moment: the sudden, slick release of pressure, the warm gush of his come and your slick leaking out around where heâs still half-buried inside you.
You make a soft, surprised sound, half gasp, half sleepy giggle as the fullness recedes. Bucky freezes, breath catching in his throat like heâs afraid to break the spell, but then his face cracks into a shy, lopsided grin.
âEasy,â he murmurs, voice gravel-rough from hours of whispering confessions and love, but now thereâs a goofy lightness in it. âIâve got you. Just⌠breathe, okay?â
He pulls out carefully, wincing when the last of the knot slips free with a wet, obscene sound that makes both of you flush bright red and immediately dissolve into muffled laughter. More come spills out immediately, hot and messy, soaking your thighs, the sheets, the space between you. The scent hits harder now, thick, unmistakable, a cloud of sex and bonding that fills the tiny attic room like smoke.
You both stare at the mess for a heartbeat, wide-eyed, frozen, then at each other.
âShit,â you whisper, cheeks burning so hot youâre sure theyâre glowing.
âYeah,â he agrees, voice small and cracking with embarrassed giggles. âShit. Thatâs⌠thatâs a lot. Like⌠wow. Did we⌠did we do that?â
Bucky moves first, sitting up on his knees like heâs trying to look responsible, reaching for the edge of the quilt to wipe between your thighs with gentle, hesitant swipes. His hands shake a little, careful not to press too hard on tender skin, but he keeps missing spots because heâs laughing too hard under his breath.
âSorry if itâs- uh- cold. Or sticky. Or⌠everything,â he mumbles, cheeks flaming, ears bright red. âIâm trying to be⌠gentlemanly? I think?â
You bite your lip to keep from laughing harder, the absurdity of it all bubbling up like champagne. âItâs fine. Youâre being very⌠thorough. Like a little nurse.â
He glances up, caught, then ducks his head again, ears practically glowing. âJust- donât want you uncomfortable. Youâre probably sore. I was⌠enthusiastic. Oh god, I said that out loud.â
You snort softly, legs parting shyly, watching his face, focused, reverent, still streaked with dried tears from the night before, hair a total disaster from your fingers. âThatâs one word for it. You were⌠very thorough there too.â
He finishes cleaning you as best he can, then wipes himself down, cock still half-hard and glistening, thighs sticky, before tossing the soiled corner of the blanket aside with a dramatic grimace that makes you both giggle again. The sheets are a wreck, stained, rumpled, reeking of you both but he pulls the top quilt over the worst of it, buys you both a few more minutes of denial.
You sit up slowly, wincing at the soreness between your legs, the dull throb in your neck where the bite pulses like a second heartbeat. The fresh mark is raised, red, already scabbing at the edges, his claim, permanent now. Buckyâs eyes flick to it, then away, but this time thereâs no guilt flash, just a soft dopey smile and a blush that spreads to his chest.
You reach out, fingers brushing his cheek. âHey. Look at me.â
He leans into your touch like a man starved, eyes closing for a second, then opening again with that same silly, lovesick grin. âI did that,â he says, voice small and proud and a little awed. âI⌠I marked you. And you let me.â
âYeah,â you say softly, thumb tracing the line of his jaw. âAnd I wanted it.â
He giggles, high and nervous and so Bucky it makes your heart flip. âYou did. You really did. I kept asking if you were sure and you just kept saying âyes, Bucky... pleaseâ like⌠like I was gonna stop or something. I was so nervous I almost dropped you during it.â
You laugh, soft and happy, leaning forward to bump your forehead against his. âYou didnât drop me. You were perfect. Clumsy, but perfect.â
Downstairs, voices begin to drift up, parents stirring, coffee brewing, the clink of mugs, Beccaâs laugh at something her boyfriend said. Normal morning sounds. Innocent sounds.
Your stomach does a happy little flip instead of dropping.
âTheyâre gonna smell it,â you whisper, but thereâs no panic, just giddy excitement. âThe whole house is gonna reek of- of us. Of sex. Of bonding. Theyâll know. Oh god, theyâll know.â
Buckyâs grin turns mischievous, eyes sparkling. âYeah. They will. And Iâm weirdly okay with it? Like⌠I want them to know youâre mine now. Officially. No more hiding.â
He looks toward the stairs like theyâre an adventure, then back at you, eyes dark, protective but so soft at the same time. âThey donât get to make this weird. Not today. Not when weâre this happy. Youâre mine now. Officially. And Iâm not letting anyone act like itâs something to tease about⌠unless itâs cute teasing. Then maybe.â
Before you can respond, heâs moving, scooping you up in one smooth (but slightly wobbly) motion, arms under your thighs and back, lifting you like you weigh nothing. You yelp softly, then dissolve into giggles, hands flying to his shoulders, legs wrapping around his waist on instinct.
âBuck- what-â
âShh.â He presses a quick, silly kiss to the tip of your nose, making you giggle harder. âIâm carrying you down. No arguments. Youâre sore. And⌠I donât want anyone getting too close to you right now. Not when you smell like me. Like us. Also I just⌠really like carrying you. Itâs fun.â
The possessiveness in his voice is new, low but undercut with such goofy tenderness it makes your heart flip. You wrap your arms around his neck, hiding your face against his shoulder as he carries you to the stairs, both of you giggling like idiots every time he almost trips on a step.
Heâs careful, slow steps, avoiding the creaky third one out of habit but every movement jostles you just enough to remind you of the ache between your legs, the way heâs still leaking out of you a little, slick trailing down your inner thigh. You bury your face deeper, laughing against his neck.
âThis is so embarrassing,â you whisper, but youâre grinning so wide it hurts.
âYouâre cute when youâre embarrassed,â he mutters, lips brushing your temple, voice full of that same lovesick wonder. âAnd Iâm allowed to be a little clingy now. Bonded privileges. Also Iâve wanted to do this forever and now I can and itâs awesome.â
You snort against his neck. âYouâre ridiculous.â
âYeah,â he says proudly. âBut Iâm your ridiculous.â
When you reach the bottom, the kitchen is already alive.
Your mom at the stove, flipping pancakes. Buckyâs dad pouring coffee. Becca and her boyfriend at the table, mid-conversation about some dumb TikTok. All of them freeze the second you appear in the doorway, Bucky carrying you bridal-style, both of you in rumpled sleep clothes, hair wrecked, skin flushed, the air around you heavy with sex and fresh bonding.
The room goes dead silent.
Beccaâs mug stops halfway to her mouth. Your momâs spatula hovers over the pan. Buckyâs dadâs eyebrows climb toward his hairline so high they nearly disappear into his hair.
No one says a word.
They donât have to. The scent is unmistakable, heat, rut, come, bond, all tangled together in a cloud that fills the kitchen like smoke. Everyone knows exactly what happened upstairs. Everyone knows youâre mated now.
But no one speaks. No teasing. No âso⌠how was it?â No sly grins. No congratulations shouted across the room.
They just⌠look away. Polite. Quiet. Letting the moment belong to you two, not turning it into cabin gossip or family ribbing. Becca suddenly becomes very interested in her coffee. Your mom flips a pancake with exaggerated focus. Buckyâs dad clears his throat once, then busies himself with the sugar bowl.
Itâs a kindness, unspoken but clear: we see it. We know. Weâre not ruining this.
Buckyâs grip tightens on you, but heâs grinning like an idiot, cheeks pink, eyes sparkling. He carries you past the table toward the back porch door, glaring over your shoulder at anyone whose gaze lingers even a second too long, but the glare is half-hearted because heâs too blissed-out and giggly to really mean it.
He shoulders the screen door open, steps out onto the porch with you still in his arms. The morning air is cool, lake mist curling over the water, birds calling softly from the pines. Sunlight glints off the ripples, turning everything golden and gentle.
He sets you down gently on the old wooden bench, kneeling in front of you immediately, hands on your knees, eyes level with yours.
The possessive fire dims. Whatâs left is raw, vulnerable Bucky, the boy who sat with you on the dock when you cried, the man who spent years terrified of this exact moment, the one who still canât quite believe youâre letting him stay but now heâs glowing, eyes shining, smile so big itâs almost painful.
âI need to say it properly,â he starts, voice low and rough, but cracking with giggles every few words. âNot in whispers in the dark. Not while Iâm inside you. Right here. Right now. In the daylight, where you can see my face and tell if Iâm lying⌠or if Iâm just a giant dork who canât stop smiling.â
You reach for him, fingers brushing his cheek, thumb catching a lingering tear track but youâre smiling too, wide and silly and so happy it hurts.
âYou already-â
âNo.â He catches your hand, presses it to his lips, kissing each knuckle with exaggerated care, making you laugh. âI need you to hear it. Iâm sorry. For everything. For stealing pieces of you for years, hoodies, hair ties, your swimsuit yesterday. For jerking off to the thought of you when I shouldâve just told you how I felt. For crossing lines last night, even if you said it was okay. For being too scared to say I loved you sooner. For every time I watched you too long, wanted you too much, and hated myself for it. I was a coward. A creep. I donât deserve this- donât deserve you- but Iâm begging anyway. Forgive me. Please. Or donât. But know Iâll spend the rest of my life making it right if you let me. Iâll be better. Iâll be honest. Iâll be yours. Completely. No more hiding.â
Tears shimmer in his eyes again, but heâs still grinning, shaky, real, ridiculous. Heâs shaking just a little like this is the scariest thing heâs ever done, even after last night, but heâs also so happy he can barely sit still.
You slide your hands into his hair, pull him forward until your foreheads touch, noses brushing in that silly, intimate way you used to do as kids when you were making up after a fight.
âIâve wanted you too,â you whisper, voice thick with happy tears. âFor years. Same summers, same movie nights, same goodbyes. I was scared too- scared of losing my best friend if I said anything. Scared you didnât feel it back. Scared Iâd ruin everything by admitting I thought about you when I was alone. That Iâd touch myself thinking about your hands, your laugh, the way you always looked at me like I was the only person in the room. I wanted you too. Always.â
You kiss him pouring everything into it: forgiveness, love, certainty, a little silliness when your noses bump awkwardly and you both huff a laugh against each otherâs mouths.
He melts against you, hands sliding to your waist, holding you like you might vanish. When you pull back, heâs smiling, small, shaky, real, eyes shining with pure, giddy joy.
âMine?â he asks this time, voice soft and hopeful, like a kid asking for the last cookie.
âYours,â you answer, tapping his nose with your finger. âDork.â
He laughs, quiet, relieved, and so full of love it makes your chest ache and stands, pulling you up with him. Wraps an arm around your waist, tucks you against his side like you belong there (because you do).
Together, you step back inside, past the kitchen where everyone still pointedly doesnât look, doesnât speak, just lets you have this. Your mom suddenly remembers she needs more butter. Beccaâs boyfriend becomes fascinated by his phone. Buckyâs dad clears his throat twice and busies himself with the sugar bowl again.
No one ruins the moment.
Itâs yours.
And now everyone knows it, quietly, gently, without a word.
Bucky presses a kiss to your temple as you pass the table, voice low enough for only you to hear.
âThink we can sneak back upstairs for round two after breakfast?â
You elbow him lightly, grinning. âBehave. Or Iâll make you do dishes.â
He groans dramatically. âCruel. Youâre cruel to your mate.â
You laugh and lean into him.
The morning continues.
Normal.
Except itâs not.
Itâs better.
Itâs yours.
And youâre both so blissed-out, so giggly, so stupidly in love that nothing else matters.
One year later, the cabin looks exactly the same, same weathered pine siding kissed by a decade of sun and rain, same creaky porch steps that groan under every footfall, same triangular attic window catching the late-afternoon sun like a golden wink.
But everything feels different. The air tastes sweeter, the lake glitters brighter, the summer heat wraps around you softer now that it no longer carries the sharp edge of unspoken want. The bond between you and Bucky hums quietly beneath your skin like a song you both know by heart, steady, warm, always there.
Youâre officially mated. The silver scar of his bite on your neck has faded to a delicate crescent that he still kisses every morning like itâs brand new, like heâs reminding himself you chose this, chose him.
You wear his old hoodies more often than not, and he wears your hair tie on his wrist like a wedding band he never takes off, faded blue elastic stretched thin from constant wear, a tiny, silly token that makes your heart flip every time you see it.
Heâs changed in the best ways. His hair is longer now, dark waves falling just to his chin, curling slightly at the ends when it dries after the lake, framing his face in that effortlessly sexy way that makes your fingers itch to run through it.
The stubble he started growing last winter has settled into a full, neat beard, thick, dark, and perfectly trimmed, rough against your skin in all the right ways. And his body⌠god. Heâs beefier, broader, more solid, shoulders wider from consistent gym time, arms thicker, chest and back carved with muscle that presses against you like he was built to hold you forever. Heâs not just your Bucky anymore. Heâs a man. Your man. And youâre completely obsessed.
This year the families caravanned up together again, cars loaded with coolers, beach towels, and the usual chaos of overlapping voices.
No one bats an eye when you and Bucky disappear for long âwalksâ that last hours, or when he scoops you up piggyback across the yard just because he can, your laughter trailing behind you both like music.
Theyâve had a full year to get used to it: your mom still gets misty-eyed every time she catches sight of the bite mark and murmurs something about âfinally,â Becca teases you mercilessly about âlocking him down before he could escape,â and Buckyâs dad just grunts approvingly, hands him another beer, and says âgood manâ like itâs the highest praise.
The first full day, everyone heads to the lake like always, same routine, same laughter, same sun-warmed dock. Youâre in the same black two-piece from last year, high-waisted bottoms, simple triangle top, except this time Buckyâs eyes donât dart away in guilt. They linger, dark and hungry and proud, tracing every curve like heâs allowed to look now. Allowed to touch. Allowed to claim.
You dive in first, cutting through the cool water like you own it, the shock of it making you laugh when you surface. Bucky follows, powerful strokes closing the distance fast, hair slicked back dark and dripping, beard glistening with lake water. When you reach the dock, heâs already there, waiting, grinning, water dripping from his lashes and the ends of his hair.
âRace you to the buoy?â you challenge, splashing him lightly, droplets catching the sun like diamonds.
He doesnât answer with words. Just lunges.
You squeal as he catches you around the waist underwater, spinning you until your back presses against the dock pilings. The wood is rough against your spine, but his hands are gentle, sliding up your sides, pinning your wrists above your head with one palm while the other cups your cheek, thumb brushing your bottom lip. His beard scrapes lightly against your skin when he leans in close, rough, delicious friction that makes you shiver.
âCheater,â you breathe, laughing against his mouth.
âWinner,â he corrects, voice low and rough, then kisses you, deep, slow, breathless. Water laps around you both, cool against heated skin, but the kiss is fire. His tongue slides against yours, lazy and possessive in the way heâs perfected over the last year, like heâs reminding you that this is real now. You arch into him, legs wrapping around his waist, feeling him harden against you through his trunks, his body pressing you firmly to the wood.
He breaks the kiss just enough to murmur against your lips, voice husky, âMissed this view last year. You in this suit. Me not allowed to touch. Had to dive under the water like an idiot to hide how hard I was.â
You nip his bottom lip, grinning. âYouâre allowed now.â
His eyes darken, pupils blown wide. âGood thing weâre underwater.â
He kisses you again, harder this time until youâre both gasping, clinging to the dock, the rest of the family too far away to notice (or pretending not to, because theyâve learned). When you finally surface for air, foreheads pressed together, heâs smiling, goofy, boyish, the same smile he gave you when you were kids racing to the buoy, but now itâs edged with something darker, hungrier.
You reach up, fingers threading through his wet hair, tugging lightly. âThis hair is getting ridiculous,â you tease, voice breathy. âYou look like a sexy pirate. And this beardâŚâ You drag your fingertips along his jaw, feeling the rough scrape, scratching lightly through the thick scruff. âGod, I love it. Itâs so scratchy. Iâm gonna have beard burn everywhere and Iâm not even mad.â
He groans low in his throat, hips rocking against you once, helpless, leaning into your touch like a puppy getting pets, eyes fluttering shut, beard pressing harder into your palm as you scratch. âFuck- keep doing that,â he mutters, voice wrecked. âYouâre killing me, honey.â
âI am,â you admit, grinning, scratching your nails gently through his beard again, watching him melt. âMakes you look like a man now. All beefy and grown-up. Iâm obsessed. Youâre so hot itâs unfair.â
His eyes flash and he leans in, beard rasping deliciously against your throat as he nips lightly. âCareful what you wish for. Keep scratching like that and weâre not making it back to the cabin.â
That night, the attic room feels different too.
No more pretending. No more guilt. Just you, him, and the quiet hum of the bond between you.
Youâre already in bed when he climbs the stairs, same old pull-out couch, same faded quilt but this time youâre wearing nothing but his t-shirt, legs bare, hair loose over your shoulders. He stops in the doorway, just looking, eyes soft and awed like he still canât believe this is real after a whole year.
You crook a finger, smiling. âCome here, baby.â
He obeys instantly, kicking the door shut, locking it, crawling over you with that slow, predatory grace heâs learned you love, longer hair falling forward, brushing your cheeks as he leans down. The kiss starts soft, then deepens as he settles between your thighs, already hard and ready against you.
âMissed this room,â he murmurs against your mouth, voice thick. âMissed you in it. Without the guilt. Without the fear.â
You slide your hands under his shirt, tracing scars and muscle, feeling the bond flare bright at every touch. âNo fear tonight. No guilt. Just us.â
He groans softly when you tug the shirt off him, then helps you out of his. Skin on skin. Heat on heat. The bond sings as he flips you onto your stomach, his body caging you from behind. He presses hot, open-mouthed kisses down your spine, beard scraping deliciously against your skin, making you arch and giggle.
âOn your knees, sweetheart,â he rasps, voice rougher now, that primal edge creeping in. âWanna see you like this.â
You obey, heart racing, thighs trembling, pushing up onto your knees, ass in the air. He groans low, hands gripping your hips, thumbs spreading you open. âFuck⌠look at you. So pretty for me.â
He slides in from behind, slow at first, letting you feel every thick inch, then deeper, harder, until heâs buried to the hilt. You moan into the pillow, fingers clutching the sheets. He starts thrusting, deep, steady, powerful, his bigger frame rocking you forward with each snap of his hips.
One hand slides up your back, fingers tangling in your hair, tugging your head back just enough to make you gasp. The other comes down, sharp, playful smack against your ass. You yelp, surprised, then moan, pushing back against him.
âDidnât know you had it in you,â you breathe, voice shaky with pleasure.
He leans over you, beard scraping your shoulder, voice low and filthy in your ear. âBeen holding back for years, baby. Now I donât have to. Youâre mine. Gonna fuck you like Iâve always wanted to.â
Another smack, lighter, teasing, then his hand soothes the sting, kneading the flesh. Youâre dripping around him, clenching hard, and he growls, pace picking up, harder, deeper, hips snapping against your ass with filthy, wet sounds.
âGod- yes- right there,â you whimper, pushing back to meet every thrust. âHarder, Bucky⌠pleaseâŚâ
He obeys, grunting, primal, one hand braced beside your head, the other gripping your hip so hard youâll have marks tomorrow. His beard scrapes your neck as he leans down, biting lightly at your shoulder, not claiming, just possessive.
âFuck- you take me so good,â he rasps. âSo tight⌠so wet⌠all mine.â
You come first, shattering around him, crying out into the pillow, walls fluttering and milking him. He follows seconds later, deep, guttural groan, hips slamming forward one last time as he fills you, knot swelling, locking you together.
He collapses over you, careful not to crush you, both of you panting, sweaty, laughing breathlessly into the sheets.
After the knot eases, he rolls you both to the side, still buried inside, arms wrapped tight around you, nose buried in your hair.
He presses a kiss to the bite mark, gentle, reverent, then nuzzles lower, nosing at your collarbone, your chest, until his lips brush the edge of your breast.
You laugh softly, sleepy. âWhat are you doing?â
âReclaiming every inch,â he murmurs, voice thick with contentment. âGonna mark you everywhere eventually. Gonna make sure you never forget who you belong to.â
You roll your eyes, fond, fingers carding through his hair, then scratching lightly through his beard. He leans into it like a puppy, eyes fluttering shut, low rumble in his chest, beard pressing harder into your palm.
âGod, I really love this beard,â you whisper, scratching again, watching him melt.
He groans, hips rocking lazily against you once. âKeep scratching like that and weâre not sleeping tonight.â
You grin, wicked. âGood. Because I want you again. And again. And again.â
He kisses you, then pulls back just enough to rest his forehead against yours, eyes shining with that same lovesick wonder.
âI love you,â he says softly.
âI love you too Buck,â you answer, brushing a strand of hair from his face.
He laughs, quiet, relieved and so full of love it makes your chest ache and curls tighter around you.
The attic is quiet again.
But this time, itâs full of giggles, teasing, and the promise of forever.
The kitchen is its usual beautiful chaos the morning after, pancakes sizzling on the pan, butter melting into golden pools, coffee brewing with that rich, comforting smell that always means home.
Becca and her boyfriend are already in full debate mode over the last blueberry muffin, forks poised like swords, while sunlight pours through the big windows, turning everything warm and golden. The faint scent of lake water still clings to the air from yesterday, mixing with syrup and bacon in the best way.
You and Bucky wander in hand-in-hand, both freshly showered but still glowing like youâve been dipped in honey and sunlight. His hair is still damp, pushed back messily from his face, a few soft waves curling against his neck. The beard is dark and scruffy, framing that strong jaw perfectly, and his shoulders look even broader in the soft morning light, the plain t-shirt clinging just enough to show how much beefier heâs gotten. He looks like a man whoâs been well-loved and is very pleased about it. Youâre in one of his oversized hoodies, sleeves flopped over your hands, legs bare under sleep shorts, hair still a little tangled from his fingers last night.
The second you step through the doorway, the room doesnât exactly go silent, it just⌠pauses. Like everyone collectively holds their breath for half a second, then decides to be extra nice about it.
Your mom glances up from the stove first. Her eyes flick between you two, land on the fresh bite mark peeking above the hoodie collar, and her whole face melts into the softest, knowing smile. She doesnât say anything, just turns back to the pancakes with a tiny, satisfied hum and starts humming an old tune under her breath.
Buckyâs dad lowers his newspaper slowly, takes one look at the pair of you, Buckyâs arm already around your waist, your head tucked against his shoulder and grunts. âTook you long enough.â
Becca snorts so hard she nearly inhales her muffin. She coughs, eyes watering, then points her fork at you both with zero remorse. âOkay, first of all, loud. Like, loud loud. We all heard you last night. Thin attic floorboards, guys. Thin. Attic. Floorboards. I was trying to watch a movie and it sounded like someone was moving furniture up there. Repeatedly.â
Her boyfriend chokes on his coffee, trying (and failing) to hide a grin behind his mug. He coughs into his elbow, shoulders shaking.
Your face flames instantly. Buckyâs ears go bright red, but he doesnât let go of your hand in fact, he squeezes it tighter, thumb rubbing soothing little circles over your knuckles like heâs trying to calm you both down at once.
Becca keeps going, merciless but playful. âI mean, we were all sitting there like âshould we turn the volume up?â and then it was just⌠âoh Bucky- yes Bucky- oh my god Bucky-ââ She does an exaggerated, breathy impression that makes everyone groan in unison.
âBecca!â you squeak, burying your face in Buckyâs shoulder, mortified but already starting to giggle.
Heâs laughing now, quiet, embarrassed but so happy he canât help it. His free arm slides around your waist, pulling you flush against his side like heâs shielding you (and maybe showing off a little). âWe⌠uh⌠got carried away,â he mumbles, scratching the back of his neck with his free hand. His beard rasps against your temple when he leans down to whisper, âSorry, honey. Guess we werenât quiet. At all.â
You peek up at him, cheeks still burning, but youâre giggling too. âYou were the loud one,â you whisper back, poking his chest. âAll those growly noises. And the⌠the spanking. I didnât know you had it in you.â
His eyes darken for half a second, before he catches himself and blushes harder. âYou liked it,â he mutters, voice low enough that only you can hear. âDonât lie.â
âI did,â you admit, scratching lightly through his beard again. He leans into it like a big puppy, eyes fluttering shut for a second, a soft, happy rumble vibrating through his chest.
Becca makes a gagging noise. âGross. Youâre both gross. And loud. And gross. But also⌠kinda cute? In a disgusting way.â
Your mom finally turns fully, spatula in hand, eyes twinkling with pure mischief. âSo⌠when can we expect grandpups? Iâm not getting any younger, you know. And after last nightâs⌠enthusiastic performance⌠Iâm thinking it wonât be long.â
Bucky chokes on air. You squeak and hide your face deeper in his hoodie.
âMom!â
Buckyâs dad just chuckles, low and rumbling. âSheâs right. Cabinâs been too quiet. Needs little feet running around again. Maybe a couple of âem, judging by all that racket.â
Becca leans forward, grinning wickedly, but her eyes are soft. âYeah, Buck. You gonna put a pup or three in her this summer? Look at you, long hair, full beard, all beefed up. Youâre basically built for it now. Dad material.â
She pauses, then her voice goes all dreamy and sincere. âI just want a little niece so bad. Iâd braid her hair every morning. Tiny little French braids with ribbons. Teach her how to cannonball off the dock. Dress her up in all my old sundresses. Spoil her rotten. Please? Iâd be the best aunt.â
Buckyâs ears are practically glowing. He clears his throat, arm tightening around you possessively, but thereâs a tiny, shy smile tugging at his lips. âWeâre⌠uh⌠weâre working on it,â he mumbles, then glances at your mom and Becca with a sheepish look. âEventually. When weâre ready.â
Your mom laughs and turns back to the stove. âTake your time. But not too much time. I want to be able to chase them around the yard before my knees give out. And Beccaâs right- sheâd be the most ridiculous aunt. Already planning outfits.â
You bury your face in Buckyâs shoulder again, mortified but laughing so hard your stomach hurts. He presses a kiss to your temple, soft, lingering then whispers against your hair, voice full of that same goofy, lovesick wonder:
âWeâll get there, honey. When weâre ready.â
You nod against him, still giggling, fingers scratching lightly through his beard again. He leans into it like always, eyes half-closing, a happy little rumble vibrating through his chest.
âYeah,â you whisper back. âWhen weâre ready.â
Becca fake-gags again. âYou two are disgusting. And cute. Mostly disgusting. But also⌠hurry up with the baby. I need to practice my braiding skills.â
Bucky just grins, wide, shameless, proud and pulls you even closer, beard rasping softly against your cheek as he nuzzles in.
The kitchen fills with chatter again, normal, loud, loving, full of teasing and warmth and the promise of more family, more noise, more little feet someday.
The attic is quiet now, the kind of soft, golden hush that only comes after a long summer day. Moonlight slants through the triangular window, painting silver stripes across the rumpled quilt and your tangled legs.
Youâre sprawled across Buckyâs chest, cheek pressed to warm skin, listening to the steady thump of his heart under your ear. His hair fans out across the pillow like dark silk, still a little damp from the shower and his beard rasps gently against your fingertips as you trace lazy patterns along his jaw.
Heâs got one thick arm wrapped around your waist, the other hand resting possessively on your hip, thumb rubbing slow, absent circles through the thin fabric of his t-shirt youâre wearing.
You shift a little, propping your chin on his sternum so you can look up at him. Heâs already watching you, eyes soft and half-lidded, that quiet, lovesick smile tugging at his mouth.
Your cheeks warm. You bite your lip, suddenly shy.
âHey,â you murmur, voice barely above a whisper. âUm⌠what if⌠what if we started trying? Like⌠tonight?â
Bucky blinks. Once. Twice. His thumb freezes on your hip. His scent spikes, sharp, protective, hungry.
âTonight?â he echoes, voice cracking just a little, low rumble vibrating through his chest. His eyes search yours, stunned. âYou mean⌠pups? With me?â
You nod, cheeks burning hotter, but you donât look away. âYeah. Iâve been thinking about it a lot lately. About⌠us. A litter of little ones. Running around, maybe with your eyesâŚâ You give a small, nervous laugh, fingers twisting in his hair. âI just⌠I want that with you. If you do.â
He stares at you for a long beat, something raw and stunned flickering across his face. Then his hand slides up to cup your cheek, thumb brushing your skin so gently it makes your chest ache.
âBaby,â he breathes, voice rough with emotion. âYou have no idea how much I want that. How long Iâve wanted it.â
You smile, shy but bright, and lean down to kiss him, soft at first, sweet. But when you pull back, something shifts. His pupils are blown, breathing uneven, and you can feel him starting to harden under you.
The shyness recedes, replaced by a slow, mischievous heat.
You trace a finger down his chest, over the ridges of his abs. âYou know⌠if it happens, my bodyâs gonna change. A lot.â Your voice drops lower, teasing now. âThese are gonna get so full. Heavy. And⌠leaky.â
Buckyâs breath hitches. His grip on your hip tightens.
âJesus,â he mutters, flush creeping up his neck.
You press on, voice turning huskier. âImagine it⌠me sitting in your lap, shirt off, letting you taste. Letting you wrap that beard around my nipple while I ride you slow. Milk dripping down while youâre still inside me, still trying to put a baby in me.â
His jaw drops. Eyes go wide, dark, stunned. âFuck baby- you canât just-â He swallows hard, voice cracking again. âYou start all sweet and shy and then hit me with that?â
You giggle, the sound low and a little wicked now, and grind down once, feeling how hard heâs gotten. âCanât help it. Thinking about you breeding me⌠getting me all swollen and full⌠it makes me so wet.â
He groans, deep and wrecked, hands flying to your hips to hold you still like heâs trying not to lose it. âYouâre gonna kill me. Sweet one second, filthy the next. How am I supposed to survive you?â
You slide down his body slowly, dragging your tongue along the deep lines of his abs, tasting warm skin and faint salt, following the trail lower. When you reach the waistband of his sweats, you nuzzle the thick bulge there, pressing soft, open-mouthed kisses over the fabric. You feel him twitch, hear the sharp inhale above you.
âBaby-â His voice is hoarse, hips jerking up just a fraction.
You hum against him, hot breath soaking through, then pull away completely.
Without a word, you roll onto your side, back to him, curling up like youâre ready to sleep. The t-shirt rides up just enough to bare the curve of your hip and the tops of your thighs, quiet invitation, quiet torture.
Silence. Thick. Heavy.
You can practically feel his eyes burning into your back, hear the ragged edge to his breathing.
A beat. Then the mattress dips. His chest presses flush to your spine, arm sliding around your waist, pulling you tight against him. His cock, rock-hard, settles hot against your ass through the sweats.
âYou think you can say all that,â he growls low against your ear, beard scraping your neck, âget me this desperate⌠then just roll over like youâre going to sleep?â
You bite your lip to hide the smile, staying still.
His palm spreads over your stomach, like heâs already picturing it round with his child. âNot happening, sweetheart. You started this fire.â
He rocks forward once, slow, letting you feel every inch. Then his hand slips lower, fingers dipping under the hem of the t-shirt, sliding between your thighs. Youâre soaked, have been since the first shy words left your mouth and he groans when he finds you bare and slick.
âFuck, youâre dripping,â he mutters, voice wrecked. Two thick fingers circle your clit once, twice, then sink inside you slow and deep. You arch back against him with a soft whimper.
âBucky-â
He curls them just right, thumb pressing your clit in lazy circles while his other hand tugs your thigh up and back, opening you for him. âGonna fill you up tonight,â he rasps against your ear. âGonna fuck you slow and deep until it takes. Until youâre carrying my kid.â
The words hit like a spark. You clench around his fingers, moaning softly.
He pulls his hand free just long enough to shove his sweats down, freeing his cock, thick, hot, already leaking at the tip. He notches himself at your entrance, rubbing the head through your folds, coating himself in you.
âTell me you want it,â he breathes, voice trembling with restraint. âTell me you want me to breed you, baby.â
You reach back, threading your fingers through his hair, tugging him closer. âI want it,â you whisper, voice shaking with need. âWant you inside me. Want you to come deep and stay there until Iâm full. Please, Bucky.â
Thatâs all it takes.
He pushes in slow, inch by thick inch until heâs seated to the hilt. You both groan at the stretch, the perfect fit. He stills for a second, forehead pressed to your shoulder, breathing hard like heâs trying to hold himself together.
Then he starts to move.
Slow at first, long, deliberate strokes that drag against every sensitive spot inside you. His arm bands around your waist, holding you flush while his other hand slips between your legs again, rubbing tight circles over your clit.
âGonna keep you like this all night,â he murmurs, voice rough and reverent. âGonna fuck you full. Gonna watch these get heavy for me. Gonna taste you when they start leaking.â
The filthy promise, combined with the deep grind of his hips, snaps something in you. You push back to meet every thrust, soft moans spilling out as the pleasure builds fast and bright.
He picks up the pace, hips snapping harder now, the wet sound of skin on skin filling the quiet attic. His beard rasps against your neck as he mouths at your scent gland, teeth grazing just enough to make you shiver.
âCome for me,â he growls low. âCome on my cock while I fill you up. Gonna give it to you- gonna breed you right now.â
The words tip you over. You clench hard around him, crying out his name as the orgasm crashes through you, waves of heat, pulsing, pulling him deeper. He follows seconds later with a broken groan, burying himself as far as he can and coming hard, hot pulses flooding you, hips stuttering like he canât stop.
He stays buried deep, knot swelling inside you, one hand splayed protectively over your stomach. His lips brush your shoulder in lazy, sated kisses.
âGonna stay like this a while,â he murmurs, voice soft now, wrecked and tender. âGonna make sure it takes.â
You hum, content, threading your fingers with his over your belly. âGood,â you whisper. âBecause Iâm not letting you go. Ever.â
The attic is quiet again.
But now itâs full, full of ragged breaths slowing to calm, full of the warm, sticky promise between your thighs, full of maybe, someday little feet on the porch.
Summary: In the underworld of 1900s London, feared mob boss Tom Riddle rules the East End with a brutal hand. But when the blood dries and the city quiets, he always finds his way to youâhis favorite indulgence in a brothel full of painted smiles. Youâre naive, streetwise, and far too willing, but when he visits after a deal gone bloody, you begin to realize that youâre more than just his favorite stress relief. You are his little dove.
Words: 6.0k
Warnings: Explicit sexual content: oral sex (f. and m. receiving), penetrative sex, light choking, mild degradation/praise kink, D/s dynamic. Power imbalance. Age gap. Non-magical AU, set in 1900s London.
You always knew when he was coming.
It wasnât the bell above the brothelâs front door, it never rang for men like him. It wasnât footsteps or voices; the girls never spoke when he passed by, too afraid, too reverent. No, it was something else entirely, something that settled in your bones before he even arrived.
A shift in the air. A sudden hush, like the city itself knew the devil was near.
Tonight was no different.
You were halfway through brushing your hair when the candle on your vanity flickered. The dull murmur of conversation downstairs stopped so abruptly it startled you. Then came the steps, slow and deliberate, across the creaky wooden floor of the hallway. Heavy boots, polished but blood-worn.
Your heart gave a little flutter. Not fear, not quite. Anticipation. Stupid, girlish anticipation.
You were twenty-one years old, no longer a child, but sometimes it felt like you still played pretend. Painted face, corseted waist, soft thighs for sale in the red-light underworld of London. Youâd been working at Madame Lysaâs for nearly three years now, but Tom Riddle wasnât like the other men who came through your door. Most bought time. Tom bought obedience. Devotion. Silence.
And you gave it to him gladly.
A knock. Just once. You stood, smoothing your hands over your silk dressing robe. Pale blue, his favorite color on you. The doorknob turned. He didnât wait for you to answer. He never did.
Tom Riddle stepped into your room like he owned it. Because in many ways, he did.
âLittle dove,â he said in that low, refined voice, the kind that didnât belong in the East End. The kind that sent a shiver straight down your spine.
You dipped your head, lips curling in something like a smile. âYouâre early, Mr. Riddle.â
He closed the door behind him with a soft click. There was blood on his shirt sleeve. You tried not to stare.
âAm I?â he murmured. âDid I interrupt something?â
âJust brushing my hair.â
He glanced at the brush on your vanity, then at you, as if deciding whether you were telling the truth. Of course, you were. You always told him the truth. Or at least, the version of it he wanted to hear.
He looked tired tonight, not that youâd ever dare say so. There was a tension in his shoulders he usually kept buried beneath his tailored coats and half-lidded charm. His dark curls were wind-tousled, the collar of his black coat turned up against the cold. He smelled of smoke and violence.
You loved that smell.
âTake off your robe,â he said.
No pleasantries, no requests. He never asked.
You loosened the sash at your waist, letting the robe slip from your shoulders. Beneath, you wore a soft white chemise trimmed in lace. Your nipples peaked beneath the fabric from the chill and maybe, just maybe, from the way he was looking at you. Like he might devour you if he was only slightly less tired.
Tom sat down in your vanity chair, unbuttoning the cuffs of his blood-stained shirt with steady fingers. He didnât look at you as he spoke. âCome here.â
You crossed the room barefoot, knees soft, steps silent. Like a good girl. Like his girl.
He tugged you into his lap without ceremony, strong arms circling your waist. His hands were cool against your bare thighs as he guided you to straddle him. The chemise bunched around your hips.
There was a knife sheathed under his coatâthere always was. You could feel the press of it against your outer thigh, steel biting through layers of fabric. Another reminder: Tom Riddle was dangerous. A killer. The leader of the Knights of Walpurgis; Londonâs most feared underground syndicate. Extortion, smuggling, murder⌠his fingerprints were on it all.
But with you, he was something else. Not gentle. Never gentle. But controlled. Focused. Like you were a vice he allowed himself to indulge in moderation.
His hands slid up your spine, over the nape of your neck, tangling in your hair. âYou look pretty tonight.â
Your cheeks warmed at the compliment, absurdly. âThank you.â
He tugged your head back gently by the hair. âNo, dove. Say it properly.â
Your lips parted. âThank you, Mr. Riddle.â
That earned you a faint smile. One that didnât reach his eyes.
You never asked where heâd been. Not even when he showed up with knuckles split or blood on his collar. You werenât foolish. That was the secret to surviving men like him: know when to open your mouth, and when to keep it shut.
His eyes swept over your face, your throat, the swell of your breasts beneath the thin chemise. You could feel yourself growing warm, damp even, just from his gaze. You liked being looked at like that. It made you feel wanted, devoured, ruined.
âI had to kill a man tonight,â Tom said casually, brushing a strand of hair from your cheek. âHe made the mistake of thinking I was an idiot.â
Your lashes fluttered. You swallowed hard.
âAre you scared?â he asked.
You met his gaze. âNo.â
That was the truth. If anything, the thought of him walking in here after killing someone made your pulse race in the most wicked way.
âYou should be,â he whispered, leaning in, lips grazing the shell of your ear. âIâm not a good man, dove.â
âI know,â you breathed.
His hand slid between your thighs then, fingers ghosting up over your core. You sucked in a soft gasp. His fingers came away damp.
âSweet little thing,â he murmured. âWet already. Were you waiting for me?â
âYes, Mr. Riddle.â
He exhaled through his nose, lips pressed against your neck. You felt the flicker of tongue, the scrape of teeth. He bitânot hard, but enough to make you squeak. His hand settled around your throat.
âYou always say yes,â he said darkly.
You nodded in his grip.
And it was true. You did always say yes. Not because he paid you (though he always did, more than any of the other men), but because you wanted to. Because you craved his touch the way other women craved pearls and pastries. Because being beneath him made you feel important. Desired. His.
âYouâre not scared of me,â he mused aloud, almost to himself. âYou should be.â
Your fingers curled into the lapels of his coat. âMaybe I like being scared.â
That made something shift in his eyes, dark amusement, hunger, something deeper.
He stood suddenly, lifting you with him as though you weighed nothing. You let out a surprised yelp as he tossed you onto the bed. You scrambled up the mattress, heart thudding, heat pooling between your legs. He peeled off his coat, then his shirt, baring pale skin and a lean, muscular torso marred by scars you never asked about.
âHands above your head,â he said, voice like velvet dipped in sin.
You obeyed instantly, fingers curling into the wrought-iron headboard. The mattress dipped beneath his weight as he climbed over you, one knee between your thighs. His fingers pushed the chemise up higher, exposing your belly, your breasts.
You arched your back, wordless and wanting.
âSuch a pretty thing,â he said, voice rougher now. âAll mine.â
Your thighs squeezed together instinctively, and he chuckled, actually chuckled.
It wasnât often Tom Riddle laughed. That was for people with lighter hearts. You werenât sure he even had one. But sometimes, with you, he made sounds that felt like they could be called joy. Sometimes.
He bent to press his mouth between your breasts, slow and deliberate. His hands gripped your thighs, spreading them apart, settling between them like it was his rightful place.
And you let him.
Of course you did.
Because he was your favorite.
Because he chose you.
And because even if Tom Riddle was the devil; cruel, violent and damned, you were starting to think you wouldnât mind burning for him.
Tom didnât speak again for a long while.
He just looked at you. Let his gaze trail over your body like a slow drag of a cigarette. One hand trailed down your side, the pads of his fingers tracing your ribs, your hip, then curling beneath the swell of your thigh. He touched you like he owned you. Like he had the right.
And he did.
At least, in here. At least, in this room.
He dipped his head and pressed a kiss just below your navel, cold lips, soft pressure. You shivered. His tongue followed next, hot and slow and deliberate, tracing the seam of your stomach.
You squirmed.
âStill,â he said without looking up.
You froze.
He shifted, dragging you closer with a firm grip beneath your knees, hooking one leg over his shoulder with practiced ease. Your chemise was bunched around your waist now, lace bunched and forgotten, your body spread and bare for him. It wasnât the first time heâd seen you like this. But it always felt like the first time. The way he looked at youâlike hunger personifiedâmade your chest tighten.
âYou have no idea,â he murmured, kissing the inside of your thigh, âhow often I think about this.â
You inhaled sharply, eyes fluttering shut.
Tom had a way of making you feel more naked with words than with touch.
âYou mean when youâre strangling men in alleys?â
He chuckled. Actually chuckled.
âThere, she is,â he murmured, kissing higher. âMy sharp-tongued little dove.â
Your breath caught when he finally pressed his mouth to you. Just once. A kiss between your legs, like it was holy. Then he licked; long, slow, deliberate.
Your hips jerked.
âTomââ
His hands dug into your thighs, holding you in place. âYouâre going to be quiet, dove. Understood?â
You whimpered, but nodded. âYes, Mr. Riddle.â
âThatâs better.â
Then his mouth was on you again, and this time he didnât stop.
Tongue and lips and teeth, like worship and desecration in equal measure. He took his time, dragging the flat of his tongue over your folds, sucking softly at your clit until you nearly sobbed. Then slowing down again, just to feel you tremble. It wasnât rushed. There was no hurried frenzy, no frantic mess of lust. No, Tom Riddle savored you. Tasted you. Like wine. Like sin.
Your fingers curled tight into the bedsheets.
He worked you open with his tongue, dipping inside you then circling back up, coaxing little whines from your throat. He liked to play with your edge, bring you close, pull you back, repeat until your thighs trembled uncontrollably.
âPlease,â you gasped once, high and needy, before you could stop yourself.
He pulled away only to fix you with a dark glare.
âWhat did I just say?â
You bit your lip. âTo be quiet.â
âAnd yetââ
âIâm sorry,â you whispered, chest heaving.
He kissed your inner thigh, wet and mocking. âYou will be.â
Then he dove back in.
You came hard minutes later, thighs clamped around his head, hips grinding into his mouth despite your best efforts to behave. He let you. Didnât stop until you were twitching, breathless, his tongue still working you through it as if your orgasm belonged to himâa gift he was determined to keep unwrapping.
When he pulled away, his lips and chin were slick with you. He wiped them with the back of his hand like it was nothing. Just another part of the evening.
You were still panting when he crawled up your body and kissed your jaw, your throat, the corner of your mouth. His breath was hot, sharp. The scent of you still on him.
âGood girl,â he murmured, trailing a finger down your cheek. âSo sweet.â
You turned to kiss him, but he pulled back.
Your brow furrowed. He saw it. Smirked.
âYou want to kiss me after Iâve been between your legs?â
Your face flushed. âYes.â
That seemed to amuse him. He pressed a kiss to your mouth, slow, claiming, deliberate.
It was the first time he had kissed you that night.
You whimpered into it, wrapping your arms around his neck as your body arched against his. His tongue swept into your mouth, tasting, teasing. He kissed like a man who didnât kiss often. Like it was a luxury.
When he pulled away, your lips were kiss-bruised and wet.
Then his voice dropped to a whisper. âNow. On your knees.â
Your pulse skipped.
You moved slowly, limbs still shaky. He stepped back, watching you with heavy eyes as you slid off the bed and sank to your knees on the rug, bare thighs folded beneath you, hands in your lap.
You looked up at him.
Tom was already unbuckling his belt.
âYou know what to do.â
You nodded once, then reached up to unbutton his trousers. His cock was already hard when you freed it from his briefs, thick and flushed at the tip. He was bigger than most, but you knew him well enough by now. You knew the weight of him, the way he liked itâslow first, teasing, before you took him deeper.
But tonight felt different. He was⌠on edge. His hand twitched slightly where it hung at his side. Tension in his jaw. A storm beneath the surface.
You pressed a kiss to the tip first, soft and slow. Then ran your tongue along the underside of the shaft. A small reward for his patience. Then another kiss, lower, just above the base. You could feel his thigh flex beside your cheek.
âDonât tease me,â he warned lowly.
So you didnât.
You wrapped your lips around him, taking the tip into your mouth, sucking softly before slowly easing down further. He groaned. A low, rough sound that made you feel electric. One hand slid into your hair, not forceful yet, but present. Possessive.
You bobbed your head slowly, working your tongue around him. He was hot and heavy on your tongue, the taste of him sharp and musky.
âFuckââ he whispered, voice cracking just slightly. âLook at you.â
You did.
You looked up at him through your lashes, lips stretched around his cock, spit beginning to drip from the corners of your mouth. His eyes darkened. His hand tightened in your hair.
You hollowed your cheeks, sucked a little harder.
âTake more,â he growled. âYou can.â
And you tried. You always did for him.
You took him deeper, your throat tightening, gagging just slightly before pulling back. Saliva coated your lips, your chin. He cursed under his breath and grabbed your chin, thumb dragging over your bottom lip.
âYouâre filthy,â he murmured. âYou like this too much.â
You nodded, eyes wide, desperate to please.
âCondom,â you managed to say, breathless.
His brow ticked in approval. âYou remember.â
Tom reached into his coat pocket. Of course he carried them. Of course heâd planned this. He always did.
He rolled the condom on himself with the same clinical precision he used to handle knives and coins. But he didnât push you away once it was on. No. He let you keep going.
And you did. You sucked him off through latex, ignoring the rubber taste, letting him fuck your mouth slow and deep until his head tipped back and his breath hitched.
He didnât come. Not yet. He wouldnât let himself.
When he pulled out, your mouth was aching, lips swollen, jaw sore.
He looked down at you like you were his favorite artwork. Something ruined and sacred. Something only he got to touch.
âYouâre going to lie back for me now,â he said, voice hoarse. âIâm not done with you.â
Your breath caught.
âI thought youââ
âI said Iâm not done, dove.â
You shivered.
He kissed your forehead softly. It was the gentlest thing heâd done all night. Then he lifted you into bed again.
And that was when you realised, Tom Riddle wasnât here for stress relief.
He was here because he needed something only you gave him.
Control. Worship. A place to rest.
The bed creaked softly as he set you back against the sheets, your body pliant in his hands. The room smelled of him nowâcigarettes, leather, sweat, sexâand you were drowning in it, in him.
Tom Riddle loomed above you like judgment itself, shirtless, cock hard and sheathed, eyes black with hunger. Controlled. Always so controlled. You had never seen him lose composure, not even when he killed a man for lying about coin.
But tonight⌠tonight there was something close to unhinged simmering just under his skin.
You could feel it in the way he looked at you. Not with lust alone but with claim.
âSpread your legs for me,â he said quietly.
You obeyed instantly. Your thighs fell open, sore already from his mouth, and you felt the cool air kiss your soaked center. His eyes dropped there. His jaw twitched.
âLook at you. Wet and wide open,â he muttered, running his fingers down your inner thigh. âYou need to be fucked, donât you?â
You nodded. âYes, Mr. Riddle.â
He hummed approvingly and ran the tip of his condom-covered cock through your folds, dragging slowly through your slick. You whimpered at the friction.
But he didnât push in.
Not yet.
He stared down at your body like a man standing at the edge of a cliff, teetering. And you knew that if he stepped forward, there would be no going back.
âYouâll take it slow,â he said more to himself than to you. âYouâll behave.â
You blinked up at him. âAlways.â
That seemed to break whatever restraint was holding him back. He leaned in, pressing a kiss to your mouthârougher this time, less polished. You tasted the edge of obsession there, and it made your heart race.
Then he rolled his hips forward, and finallyâfinallyâhe slid inside.
You gasped. Not from pain, but the stretch. Tom wasnât gentle about it. He went slow, yes, but with purpose. Like he was staking something. Carving his presence into you.
âFucking tight,â he ground out, halfway in, his hands braced beside your head. âOf course you are.â
You clawed at the sheets, breath caught in your throat. He eased in deeper, inch by inch, filling you until you could feel him in your stomach. Your walls clenched around him involuntarily.
âYou feel me, dove?â he whispered against your cheek. âRight hereââ He dragged a hand down your belly, pressing over your lower abdomen.
You moaned.
He started to move then, slow, deep strokes that made you keen. The sound of your slick, the heavy slide of him inside you, filled the air alongside your ragged breaths.
Tom groaned above you. His head fell to your neck.
âYou always take me so well,â he said, almost reverent. âLike your cunt was made for me.â
You could barely speak. Your body was tight and trembling, every thrust sending sparks through your spine. You wrapped your legs around his waist and clung to him, dizzy and hot.
And still he didnât speed up. He kept the pace torturously slow. Measured. Intentional.
âTomââ
He pulled back just enough to look at you. âWhat is it, little dove?â
âIâ I need more.â
He tilted his head. âMore?â
You nodded, pupils blown. âHarder. Please.â
He smirked.
âSay it properly.â
âPlease, Mr. Riddle. I want you to fuck me harder.â
That did it.
The switch flipped.
He growled low in his throat and snapped his hips forward, harder now, faster, grinding deep. You cried out, fingers scrambling for purchase on his back. His cock hit places inside you that made your vision blur. Your body shook.
One of his hands slid to your throat.
Not squeezing. Just resting there.
âYouâre mine,â he hissed against your jaw. âThis body, this cunt, all of it. Mine.â
âYesââ you gasped, âyes, yes, all yoursââ
He fucked you harder now, deeper, rocking the bed beneath you with each sharp thrust. Your orgasm built fast, fire curling in your gut.
âDonât come yet,â he growled.
You whimpered, fighting it.
âI saidâdonât.â
You sobbed his name, body convulsing, nails digging into his shoulder.
âYouâre going to hold it like a good girl. And when I say you can come, you will. Youâll come around my cock like youâre grateful for it.â
You bit your lip so hard it almost bled.
His hand tightened just slightly on your throat.
âAre you grateful?â
âYes, Mr. Riddleâso grateful, Iââ
âThen prove it.â
He slammed into you again, deeper, grinding against your clit with every drag of his hips. You were shaking now, wrung out with pleasure. The orgasm pulsed just below the surface, threatening to crest.
You held it. Barely.
Tom leaned in close, lips brushing your ear.
âNow.â
You shattered.
You screamed his name as you came, your body seizing around him, walls clenching tight as waves of pleasure surged through you. Your back arched off the bed. You sobbed. You trembled. And still he fucked you through it, chasing his own release.
He came with a grunt, cock twitching inside you, his body going still, trembling with restraint as he poured into the condom.
For a long moment, the only sound in the room was your heavy breathing. Then the creak of the bed as he pulled out.
You whimpered at the loss.
Tom reached for a handkerchief from his discarded coat and cleaned you gentlyâtoo gently for a man like him. He peeled off the condom, knotted it, tossed it into the small waste bin near your dresser.
Then silence.
His eyes traced over your spent body, legs still trembling, thighs glistening with sweat. You looked ruined.
You looked perfect.
âCome here,â he said.
You were already in his arms before he finished the sentence. He lay back against the headboard, dragging you into his chest. Your face tucked under his jaw, your limbs tangled with his. He stroked your back slowly. It felt like the first true softness of the night.
And maybe the only softness Tom Riddle ever allowed himself.
âIs it true?â you whispered after a moment.
He didnât speak, but you felt his brows lift.
âWhat you said. That Iâm yours.â
There was a long pause.
Then: âDonât ask me that, dove.â
âWhy not?â
His jaw flexed.
âBecause I donât share,â he said finally. âAnd I donât lie.â
You didnât ask again.
Instead, you lay against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart.
You thought of the blood on his cuffs, the look in his eyes when he slid inside you, the ache between your thighs that felt like something claimed.
You thought of the way he touched you like you were his only softness.
His only vice.
His little dove.
And you realized: if you were his, truly his⌠you might never be free again.
Summary: Tom wakes you up in the middle of the night to "talk about your paper" ââ´ď¸Ë・â
Tags:  nipple play, munch tom, magic theory I made up, gf stealer tom, Legilimency, parseltongue lisp, bondage, probably voyerism,
Word count: 4.7k
a/n: posting this so im motivated to finish pt 2 !!
We werenât betrothed but it didn't make our relationship any less real.Â
 After months of being potions partners, murmuring encouragement and advice to each other, Malfoy finally took the next step. When Abraxas Malfoy greeted you in the great hall with a bouquet of roses, you were completely bewitched. Now, he guides you by the arm classroom to classroom. The perfect gentleman. His courtesy, confidence, and respectfulness was always extended to you. Even if his parents didn't approve of you as a final match, they still welcomed you to the manor and treated you befitting to a Malfoy heiress.Â
Snuggled up in your emerald green silken nightgown, you studied Abraxasâ profile. As he lays on his back and unleashes his burdens to you, the candle light highlights his blonde eyelashes and pointed nose. Hoping to soothe his worries, you drape yourself across his chest, you trace the embroidered ABM on the pocket of his matching pjs.Â
âDont lose sleep over the future, Brax.â You reach for his pale fingers and grasp them. âEverything will work out for us!â With a sleepy smile, you try to coax him from his anxiety and go to bed.
âI know, darling, but with the ministry-âÂ
You never meant to, but you snapped back at him. âThe ministry doesnât matter! Are we graduated? Do you suddenly need employment? Please, Brax, itâs late!âÂ
âSorry darling, youâre right. Letâs just go to sleep.â Abraxas sighs, obviously miffed that you cut off his nightly rant. Silky yet strong arms wrap around you as you get situated. He turns so that you may spoon, his left arm under your pillow while the other tucks under your chest and pulls you tightly against him. Abraxas buries his face into the crook of your neck and takes a deep breath.Â
âFather is pushing me too hard. A perfect heir would bend and strengthen under the weight.â His grip tightens. âI canât let it break meâŚâ When his voice cracks, so does your heart. Grabbing his right hand from your chest, you bring it to your lips.Â
Kissing his thumb you whisper, âYou are strong!âÂ
Another on his knuckle, âWorthy.â
âYou shall bring your family a most promising future, my love.â And you kiss the center of his palm before settling it on your heart. Abraxasâ body relaxes just a tad.Â
âGoodnight my love.â Within minutes, he's fast asleep. Listening to Abraxas night after night, when he shares his frustrations and fears with you, is frankly, heartbreaking. At least, you have to pretend it is.Â
Behind you, Abraxas is asleep and unaware. As you lay awake, like most nights, you ruminate about your relationship. How being connected to him opened so much of the world to you. Yes, you were pureblooded, just as he was, but not of the sacred 28. Your blood had bought you status, not riches. But on the arm of Abraxas Malfoy, you had both. People actually acknowledged you as more than chattel, not another pureblooded princess, ready to breed. It may have been cruel to use him⌠Actually you knew it was. But the way people were forced to listen to you! Even as a date to the Slug Club Christmas party, you got a chance to make connections. A chance to show off that you were a witch with a brain. The conversation you had with the Head Archivist of the Library of Alexandria was mind opening!Â
More than proud to be the second in your class, you took life very seriously. There was no way you could settle for the future society believed you to be on track for. Thinking of the marriage mart, birthing heirs, and being a doting mother put a shiver down your spine. It wasnât for you.Â
Merlin, sometimes you could only hopelessly wonder why you werenât a man. It was so unfair that they automatically were accepted, promoted, and respected. Like always, you canât help it as you roll your eyes at the thought that Tom Riddle is top of the class thanks to his dick and balls. He didnât have to parade around in dead-end relationships to get people to even look at him. He was also insufferable.Â
One of the main reasons you loved being potions partners with Malfoy so much was because it prevented the routine pairing of you and Tom. Being the top two students in the class, the most vocal in class, and often debating with each other and baffling professors - you always got paired up. Beery clearly tried to push you and Tom together. Slughorn, Merlin, he was a force. Slughorn probably thought that you and Tom would create the next generation of genius wizard babies, and wasnât very subtle about it. So, yes, having to explain every potion to Malfoy like he was 5 was a small price to pay.Â
While on the subject, your brain couldnât resist bringing up the years of being desk buddies with Tom Riddle. How at twelve, you thought he was so smart and so charming. When you were first years the two of you talked about everything - magic, spells from the library, stories, gossip. Well, actually he was more of a good listener.
And he was so handsome. Honestly, the most annoying thing about Tom is that he refused to date anyone, so you got stuck with Malfoy. Merlin, what an obtuse prick he was. Tom was such a more powerful wizard than Malfoy. Better in every way.Â
Wait, what? You shake your head in confusion. Squeezing your eyes tight and exhaling, you wiggle a little before sinking back into Abraxasâ chest. He hums in his sleep and buries his face in your hair. He talks a lot, but you cannot deny how cute he is. Deciding to try to turn your brain off and go to sleep, you think about your usual bedtime thoughts.Â
Mentally, you peruse Hogwartâs library, reading titles as you walk down the aisle. History of Ancient Magick catches your eye. Grabbing it, you continue until you find Dead but not forgotten: A Wizardâs Guide to Obsolete Magick. You always managed to work out your papers before you fell asleep, it was calming, categorizing and organizing information into paragraphs. Professor Binns was horribly boring, but that didnât dampen your love for History. As he droned on in the background, you read and annotated the textbook. You found that the curriculums were oddly similar - as each was only a brief overview of history chopped into 7 sections. The only difference being the level of analysis and allowance of âdarkerâ themes.Â
Anyways, your fingers close around a particular scroll named Unseen and Unheard: How Ancient Wizards Utilized Silent Magick. Tucking it away into your elbow, you turn on your heel and head for the study tables in the back of the library. Picking your table by the window, you sit down and crack open the first book you grabbed. Before you read it, you check the card, a habit of wanting to know who had checked the book out before you. The first name is dated from 1866 and the last was Tom M. Riddle, 1944. Even mentally, you canât help but groan and roll your eyes. Heâd probably read every book in the entire library by now. Of course Tom had gotten his hands on this one. His big hands. Those fingers of his, the way they were always covered in ink, like he was too impatient to let it dry before tracing back over his words. How the only color on his skin was a fine spattering of freckles, giving him the most elegant and perfect complexion. Oh, and how those freckles landed so perfectly on his face, drawing attention to his mouth and cheekbones.Â
The sound of Malfoyâs curtain opening makes you jerk awake. Itâs been pulled back maybe a foot and Tom is standing there, peering down at you.Â
âWhat did you do for your conclusion on Binnâs paper?â He whispers down at you.Â
âWhat?â
âAbout the analysis of the adaptation of magick.â You try to get your eyes open and stare at Tom confused.Â
Tom rolls his eyes and tries again, âGet up, tell me what sources youâre using.â He extends his hand to you. Feeling a bit more awake, you try to get up, but remember that Abraxas is still lovingly wrapped around you. Tom stands by and watches as you try to remove Abraxasâ arm, but he holds you tighter. Forcing you to kind of pry him off of youâŚÂ
Finally free of his loving grip, you grab Tomâs hand and slip out of bed. The dorm is dark and all the curtains are shut tight besides Abraxasâ and Tomâs. Impatiently, you are pulled across the gap into Tomâs bed.Â
At first, you just sit against the headboard, mirroring Tom. But, after he reaches around you and ensures his curtains are shut, he readjusts until he is simply laying on his side and facing you. Heâs comfortably under his covers, only his upper half is visible. You sit there confused, looking at Tom, in his small white undershirt, seemingly tucked into bed, with one arm bent and propping his head up, the other resting on top of the blanket.Â
âYour paperâŚ?â He raises an eyebrow.Â
âYeah, right.â Accepting that you are awake, you answer him. âIâm looking into the research about the connection of accidental magic with silent magic. Did you know it is just as likely to complete a task you do habitually with accidental magic as it is with silent? Like, the only difference is that its almost completely opposite amounts of effort. Silent requires so much effort, years of practice and a lot of self-discipline. But accidental is primal, it will save you, it can give you what you really need. Letâs say itâs 15,000 years ago and youâre cold. No one waved a wand and said, âInscendio!ââ You paused for a deep breath and realized how much youâve been talking with your hands. Tom follows your gaze and catches your train of thought. A low laugh rumbles from his chest as he just examines you.
âYou know it isnât due âtil May?âÂ
âSo what? You say that as if yourâs isnât finished!â you shoot back. Tom considers this.Â
âTrue. I guess I just forgot that you never shut up about History.â You can see the mischievous glint in his eye.Â
Poking him in the chest, you knowingly ask, âLike you donât do the same about DADA?âÂ
Tom stares at you and gently grabs your prodding finger. âSo, what?â The glint is gone and you are surprised at the shift in his tone. Youâre used to him trying to agitate you, push you into some debate. This is almost daring? As you pull your hand back, Tom doesnât let go. His hand follows yours back to your hip and rests there. Just as gently as before, his hand moves to your hip then squeezes.Â
âI think Binnâs is going to give you a recommendation when we graduate. I heard Slughorn talking about it.â Tom reveals. This news is crazy - Professor Binns was known for never writing professional recommendations. Even if his curriculum was lazy, he still was well renowned for simply teaching everyone for the last 200 years. A good word from him was extremely rare, but valuable.Â
In your excitement, you leaned towards Tom and got more comfortable. Accidentally mirroring him again, you also failed to notice how his hand shifted to your knee as you got talking.Â
âIf he does that I can work in any fucking archive I want!â Disbelief painted your face. âYou know when I asked Slughorn if he would do it at my career counseling last year, he said it was impossible.âÂ
âSomething must have swayed him.â Tom smiled and drank in your expression, just as much as he enjoyed sliding his hand up your thigh.Â
âYeah,â you softly respond. A soothing silence washes over the two of you. Somehow, it isnât awkward as you watch Tom just as intensely as he watches you. Remembering before, your eyes catch on the freckle under his left eye, then automatically dart to his mouth, where another freckle sits just to the right of his bottom lipâŚÂ His angular face becomes amused while you take him in. The hand on your hip pulls a little, inviting you to come closer to him. So you scoot, grabbing his arm to help pull yourself along. Under the thin material of his sleep shirt, Tomâs arms are lithe and smooth.
Inches apart, no one says anything as hands slowly explore. Typically, you were elbow to elbow at your desks, or elbow to ribs when he was annoying. But now thereâs no need for the intellectual contest, both of you are learning in silence. Tomâs left hand trails up your side until he is able to caress your face. And again, when he gently pulls, you move towards him. His chocolate brown eyes are pouring into yours. When your noses touch, he tilts his head just slightly to the right and closes in to brush his lips against yours. Suspended in the moment, you intimately examine Tomâs irises. How theyâre ringed in black, with tiny golden ridges. Long black eyelashes that are to die for frame them perfectly, and his eyebrows are perfect, just like his whole face, and I bet even his-Â
You flinch, feeling a little dizzy. A small headache throbs behind your ear and you catch a small smirk on Tomâs face. He rubs his thumb across your cheekbone assuringly before pulling you in for a real kiss. Melding your lips together, a sigh escapes when you feel something deeper. As he goes from kissing you tenderly to insistantly running his tongue along the seam of your lips, you respond in earnest. When your tongues touch, you open your eyes and find Tom admiring you. He takes your shock and doubles it, sucking on your lip and biting it. A small sound leaves you and he swallows it, keen on making it happen again. In between heavy kisses, he peppers your lips with pecks.Â
Feeling weakened, you let him cradle your head in his hand and lean further into his flurry of affection. You push your tongue into his mouth until your teeth click. Tom clutches your cheek and kisses you feverishly. All you can perceive is the cycle of swollen tips, his tongue, and teeth against yours. When you pause and take a breath, the fog breaks and you consider each other.Â
Now, Tomâs eyes are darker, the brown encroached by his pupils. âKiss me more,â he orders. His hand pulls your lips back to him and his arm tucks around you. Itâs easy to melt into his embrace, letting him lead you. His heated kisses make you go limp in his arms, overwhelmed by the touch. Giving you a breather, Tom draws back and plants kisses down your throat. Theyâre hard and Tom sucks just enough to where you know your skin is marked. Arching your back and pressing into him, you turn into his kisses, begging him to go harder and harder. Once Tomâs lips have reached the spot between your neck and shoulder, he bites down. While you are gasping and shuddering under him, he tugs the collar of your nightgown aside, and continues to your chest.Â
It doesnât take much for you to snatch Tomâs hand from your collar and guide it to your breast, encouraging him to massage at his will. He takes the cue instantly. His large hands are able to cup your entire breast, pushing it up so he may leave wet kisses at your cleavage. Your other hand sinks into his curly brown hair, grasping it while holding him closer and closer. Tom briefly releases you, only to push at your shoulder so you can lie on your back. He moves with you, shifting so his leg is draped over yours and he is on top of you. One of his hands is massaging your breast and the other is rubbing your nipple all while Tom dutifully worships you. Through the silk, his touch is cloying, almost giving you a buzz. You ache for more.Â
All you have to do is grab his wrist and whine and Tom stretches the collar of your nightgown and pulls your breasts out. Before gravity can settle them, he presses his thumbs over your nipples and brings them together. Flicking back and forth, as if your nipples were light switches and he wanted you on, he collapses into your bosom. Soon, his lips are replacing a hand and instead of the increasingly rough flicking, his tongue is now swirling around your nipple. Sometimes he breaks away with a pop, his swollen lips no longer holding suction to your breast.Â
You squirm under his ministrations, smother him in your chest, and try not to moan so loud.Â
âMerlin, Morgana, and fucking Mordred!â you try to pull Tom back by his hair but he refuses to unlatch. Trying again, you yank him back, and Tom looks at you dumbly. His lips are red, swollen, his face is smeared with his own spit. When you donât say anything, his eyes drop back to your breasts and he bites his lip. Seeing as heâs gone stupid, you grab him by the hair again and bring him in for a fierce kiss. You force your tongue into his mouth and swirl around him, until he awakes from his daze and returns your effort. He pushes back into your mouth and you suck on his tongue, drawing a groan from him. This encourages you, sucking a little more before biting his lip and finally pulling back.Â
Tomâs eyes are not only nearly black, but heavily lidded. Tom Riddle would never slur his words but it was very close when he whispered, âI want you to list the knights of the round table next.â Then he dove back down to your breasts and pressed a knee in between your legs. This time, when he sucked and bit and you rolled your hips, there was friction. A strangled cry left your lips and Tom rocked his knee into you, making it harder to keep quiet. His mouth was marking your skin with prayers, eternally grateful to pay homage to you. The sweep of his tongue combined with grinding on his knee made you see stars. Feeling your body tensely arch into Tom, your deep breaths bury his face into your chest. Mean fingers clench your nipples, the pain pushing your head back in ecstasy. His knee follows the pace of your shudder until it stops and he is just softly kissing you everywhere.Â
âYou never listed them,â he reminded you. Your already weak body sunk deeper into his arms as you sighed with dismay.Â
Turning away from him, âDonât make me think, Tom.â The knee pressed against your center twitched, making you whimper.Â
âIf youâre going to make a mess on my pants, at least do what I say.â You feel his nose dig into your cheek, but still ignore him. Tom continues to rock his knee against your center and you jump, not being able to hide your reaction.Â
One of his hands turns your face until you are cheek to cheek and he can whisper in your ear, âJust lissten.â A shudder runs down your spine but you still resist.Â
His irritation is palpable.Â
âYou know it, slut, list them for me.â Your head whips towards him at the insult.Â
âExcuse me?â          Â
He leaves small kisses on your cheek, all the way to your ear, and whispers, âThe knights of the round table my love, lissst them.â The tingle of his breath on the shell of your ear makes you flush. With a stuttered breath, you do as he says.
âSir Lancelot.â He rewards you with a kiss under your ear.
âSir Galahad.â His teeth run across your collar bone and you take a sharp breath.
âSir Percival.â With his open mouth, Tom sucks the swell of your breast until it hurts.
âSir Bedivere,â you whimper and he blows cool air on the bruise.Â
âSir Kay.â Swollen lips engulf your puffy nipple and suck.
âSir-â a moan breaks your recitation and when you halt, Tom tenses. He appears back in your face and gets close. Sweaty foreheads collide and you study each other. His hair is a right mess, his cheeks are so wonderfully pink, and his skin is shining with sweat. You want to keep thinking about how beautiful he is but he interrupts you, rather bossily.Â
âSay it again.â he orders.   Â
Confused, you start again. âSir-â his mouth muffles the rest. It takes a second for you to realize what he means. You canât help the small laugh.Â
âWell then, sir, shall I continue?â you inquire, smiling cheekily. Tom graces you with a smile and kisses your cheek. Then he scoots back down to continue where you had left off.Â
Itâs hard to talk with his mouth back on your nipple, but you manage. âSir Tristan.â
âSir Bors.â Tom gives you a chase kiss on your stomach.Â
âSir Gareth,â comes out as a gasp because Tom is kissing in a sinful line from your hip to the soft curls between your legs.
He stares up at you and says, âGood job, now thank me.â And with him looking so angelic with his mouth so close that his breath is sending a chill over your center, you do. Tom doesnât react the way you want though. He draws back and bites your inner thigh. When his eyes pan back to yours, theyâre irritated and you recognize where you went wrong.Â
âThank you, sirâ you purr. Tomâs arms wrap around your thighs until his hands are splayed across your hips. His nose bumps into your pussy and you can feel his body inflate as he breathes in. When he breathes out, he dives in.Â
Tom moans when he tastes you. He teases your slit before pushing past your lips and finding your clit. He laps at it eagerly and you have to grab his hair in your desperation to get him to slow down. Dark eyes zero in on yours and watch as you melt in his mouth. The eye contact only breaks when he slides his face down into your cunt. Using his tongue to penetrate and his nose to nudge against your clit, Tom goes to town. His hands grasp your hips as they buck and try to redirect them so he can get deeper.Â
If you had a single sane thought in your brain, you would feel bad about smothering Tom in your pussy as you ride his face. But he must be as stupid as you are, because he obviously loves it. Apart from the wet sounds of him being completely engulfed in your wet heat, he's moaning and muttering to himself. It's all incomprehensible under the moans leaving your own mouth.Â
One hand leaves your hips and replaces his tongue. Fingers glide into your pussy, the only resistance being your walls clenching around him. As your body reacts, Tom goes still, and gives you a knowing look.Â
âThank you, sir,â and his fingers curl inside of you. They push at just the right spot to make you almost scream. The back of your hand barely conceals it. Suddenly in tandem, his tongue and fingers fuck you perfectly, causing your body to practically float off the bed. Genuinely having to hold you down now, Tom keeps kissing your clit and pumping his fingers in and out of you. Stars reemerge in your vision and he works you through the pleasure. After your orgasm, Tom rises back into your vision.Â
You beat him to the punch, âThank you, sir.â And just cause, you pull him in for a kiss.Â
However, Despite that, Tom doesnât look pleased. You cannot fathom why.Â
âIâm sure youâve done all that with Malfoy already.â He sneers at you. Tomâs games are tired, so you just cross your arms and wait for him to get it all out. Of course, an indignant addition was coming along.Â
âI deserve a new experience.â As the idea appears to process on his face, you arenât so sure youâre happy to let this pass. Tom has a wicked smile as he quietly opens his curtain and ushers you out of his bed. He leads you around the side, near the end of Abraxasâ bed.Â
And he opens the curtain.Â
Looming over you, Tom asks a question that you know only has one answer, âAre you a good girl who listens?â
Unsure of what will happen next you swallow, âYes, sir.â Tomâs eyes flash and he flourishes his wand. He casts silencing spells, a notice me not, and something else, who knows. Tomâs hands grab you at your neck and waist and pull you in for a kiss. You can feel his hard length pressing into you and youâre hoping you know whatâs coming next. Giddy, you follow his guiding hands and spin for him. He walks you up until your hips are against the foot of the bed, steers your hands until they are wrapped around the bed posts. Wiggling your ass, you hope to tempt him to tear your clothes off already, but he has other plans.Â
Tom whispers, âIncarcerouss.â Phantom ropes bind your wrists to the bed posts. Tom pushes your back forwards, until you are bent over the bed. Then he grabs your hair and pulls your head back until your eyes focus and you realize you are staring at Abraxasâ sleeping form, sweetly clutching your pillow.Â
Anxiety kickstarts your heart and when you tug at the ropes, panic sets in. Tom watches this and his only consolation is, âAs long as weâre quiet, weâre fine, my love.â You feel his fingers grab the hem of your silken nightgown and slide it slowly until its bunched around your waist.Â
Closing your eyes, you try to forget that Abraxas is right infront of your face. In the darkness, your body relaxes. The heels of your feet inch farther apart as you spread your legs.Â
A dark chuckle comes from Tom. âYou were mad I called you a slut and now youâre doing thisâŚâ A finger runs along your slit, he finds it dripping wet. He takes his time teasing your already sensitive pussy. Lazy fingers sit there while you grind against him. The word slut echos in your mind. You could hear the smile on his face when he said it. Something thicker than his finger bump into your pussy and your mind goes blank. All you can think of is the cool wood biting into the front of your thighs and Tomâs throbbing head dipping into your cunt.Â
A hum of contentment leaves Tomâs lips as he slides his cock through your folds.Â
âI bet youâll love this,â he promises. Hands grip your ass while he snaps his hips into yours. He buries himself to the hilt and your pussy barely manages to stretch with him. The bed shakes with his thrust and there is no holding back your small scream. Both you and Tom stop, watching Abraxas, waiting for a reaction.Â
Heâs still asleep. Tom watches you tense up, remembering all over again the consequences of moaning. The dread of waking Abraxas up, getting fucked by his best freind, is too much. Before you can start pulling at your wrists and protesting, Tom unburies himself and sets a nice pace. The newfound pleasure of his hard cock finally fucking you just as you needed it makes you completely forget about Abraxas. All over again.Â
The bed is rocking but you can't find it in you to care. Tomâs hand is pushing your face into the blankets, maybe trying to muffle you, all while slamming his hips into yours. Drunk on the pleasure from the rhythmic pounding, you dont notice the scene before you until Tom pulls you up by your hair again.Â
Abraxas is awake, clutching the blanket to his chest and watching you in horror. Itâs plain on his face. Before your brain can process the damage you must be doing to him, Tom says, âDonât be so upset about this Malfoy, youâll love it.â
if you enjoyed lmk so i can finish the next part !! ( its tom x abraxas x reader !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! )
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Summary: After Christmas, things shifted just a little â hardly noticeable to you or even Tom, but a certain blonde certainly noticed and tried to nudge things in the right direction.
hi! im back!! @helloamalien gave me a wonderful idea for a Tom and mattheo tidbit and it helped me finish writing this part! enjoy!
P1 P2 P3 P4 P5 P6 P7 P8 P10(wip)
The lord had been gone for a few months now, on some sortâve of recruiting missionâas far as you knew.
That didnât matter to you, as long as it didnât affect your duties to Mattheo.
Speaking of the little lord.
âYouâre gonna be walking any day now, little one,â you cooed, smiling at Mattheo as he stood up next to a table, legs wobblyâone hand gripping the coffee table as the other held his favorite stuffed toy, dark eyes wide as he looked at you. âCome on, come on, sweet boy, you can do it.â
You cooed, gesturing Mattheo forward, he staredâŚand plopped right back down onto his butt. You laughed, shaking your head. âNot today, then?â You sighed, getting up and scooping up the little lord, heading for the kitchen to make him a snack.
Later that day, as you were sitting in the living room, enjoying the sound of the rain outside and Mattheoâs toddler babbles as he played. The front door slowly opened, the weary figure of the lord entering the manor after too long being away.
Tom sighed, shrugging off his coat and hanging it up on the coat hanger beside the door, not even bothering to be proper and taking his shoes off at the door, his shoulders relaxing at the warmth of the manor.
âDadaaa!â A squeal came from the carpet area, and Tom looked upâblinking wide as he saw Mattheo come tumbling towards him, on two feet, arms out stretched with a gummy smile. âdada!â
You covered your mouth with your hands, eyes wide with delight as Tom stared, before crouching, holding his hands out to Mattheo. âCâmon,â he whispered, voice carefully quiet, unable to help the smile that cracked on his face as Mattheo stumbled right into his hands, smiling.
âDada!â Mattheo squealed, making grabby hands at his father's face, and Tom let out a low sigh, more tension easing from his shoulders as he stoodâpulling Mattheo close, who snuggled right up to his father.
âThose were his first steps,â You said quietly, and Tom froze, looking down at Mattheo, who was tucking his head into Tomâs shoulder.
His sonâs first steps, and he was here for themâŚand was the reason for them. He held Mattheo a little tighter, swallowing hard. âGood.â Tom said, clearing his throat as his voice wavered a little. âheâs developing well,â
You nodded with a smile, and Tom, hesitating for a moment, joined you in front of the fireplace, setting Mattheo back down, who handed Tom a toy and demanded some playtime.
Tomâhad no clue how to play, heâd never done it before.
He looked to you for help and you just shrugged. âjust, move the toy around, make noises,â You said, and Tom stuck his tongue into his bottom lip, before awkwardly playing with Mattheo, who smiled and made a lot of noises that Tom assumed meant good things.
Tom put Mattheo to bed that night, you smiled, closing the door of your connected room.
Tom stared at his oldest and most trusted friend with a look heâd never worn at him before. Frustration.
âI am not. Doing that.â Tom seethed, setting down his quill, leaning back into his chair, and crossing his arms stubbornly. Abraxas sighed from where he sat in the cushy chair across from Tomâs desk.
âPeople are beginning to talk, Tom, and routinely, a ministry official with a wife and child usually ascends in the ministry much faster,â Abraxas said. âYou remember Beifong, he was perfect for minister, but because he had no wife, or child, people didnât trust him, and that coon Peivâte won instead.â
Tom rolled his eyes, glaring at his papers.
âI donât care if people care if my son has an âofficialâ mother or not, or if I have a wife or not. Iâm not getting married just to please some stuffy old wizards,â Tom sneered. âBesides, itâs not like Iâm running for minster, or do you forget the plan?â Tom drawled, and Abraxas shook his head with a sigh.
âI donât, but itâll be perhaps the easier way, and youâll gain more trust with honey than acid.â Abraxas said wisely, and Tom huffed again, puffing his cheeks.
âAre you staying you donât want me to overthrow the ministry to instate a new rule that would benefit us and preserve wizard kind?â Tom drawled, and Abraxas raised his hands in surrender.
âI never said that, I just mean, perhaps; youâll find less fight in the people if you do it the legal way, and many pureblood lords, while you do have many followers amongst us, will find more respect in you if you marry a respectable woman. Itâs a sign of stability and trust.â Abraxas said cooly, and Tom groaned, running his hand down his face.
âEven if I did want to get married, there aren't many who would be okay with me already having a child, and having a live-in nanny. Of whom, the child calls his mother.â Tom drawled, pinching his nose. Abraxas had to agree, Tom had him there.
âYou have a point, Iâll admit,â Abraxas sighed, turning his head as he heard the squealing laughter of his son Lucius playing with Mattheo. âBut just think about it, Tom. Having a wife could help you out in many areas.â Abraxas said, standing, slipping his cloak on.
âWhat other areas, other than gaining pureblood sympathy,â Tom drawled, rolling his eyes. Abraxas smirked.
âLike getting laid and finally getting your wand out of your ass,â Abraxas said and then quickly ran away as Tomâs jaw dropped and his eyes went wide, before he scrambled up and began chasing after Abraxas.
-
You glanced up from watching Lucius and Mattheo playing, blinking as Abraxas laughed and scooped Lucius up as he bolted by, the lord on his heels.
âUh,â you murmured, squealing a little as the lord ran right into you. But he picked you up and set you aside at the last second, all while continuing to run after Abraxas, who cackled as he ran out of the manor, the lord cursing after him.
You looked down at Mattheo, who was also watching the strange scene, before he looked up at you and babbled out your title âmamaâ, sighing softly; you crouched down and scooped him up, waving your wand to clean up the toys and heading back to the nursery now that Mattheoâs play date was over.
Much later, you were cleaning up the kitchen after some late night comfort baking, humming to yourself. Mattheo was asleep, the house was quiet. You turned, jolting back at the shadow in the doorway, your wand went flying, and the lord caught it as it flung at his face. âIâm so sorry,â you whispered, hands held to your lipsâeyes wide.
The lord let out anâŚamused? Huff, flipping your wand around in his fingers, striding over, and handing it back to you. âDonât, I did not mean to frighten you,â The lord murmured, and you took your wand back, slipping it up your sleeve.
âItâs okay sir, I frighten easily,â you joke it off, waving your hand dismissively, and the lord hums, taking in the kitchen and then the warm, chocolaty smell coming from the oven.
âWhat are you making?â He asked, almost awkwardly. The two of you didnât talk much outside of Mattheo.
âCookies, chocolate chip.â It went quiet after that, the lord resting against the counter as you finished cleaning up.
âAbraxas thinks I should take on a wife,â He finally says, and you raise your brow, looking at him curiously, and a little appalled. âThat was my reaction as well,â The lord huffs, running his hand through his hair. âI do not have a need for one, personally. You are here to care for Mattheo as hisâŚmother, I cannot deny that anymore,â
You nod slowly, turning off the sink. He continued; âAnd I do not have a need to take a wife for any personal reasons, but he thinks I should take one to further my goals within the ministry, that I might gain favor amongst the purebloods and more traditional wizards of the ministry,â
He lets out a long sigh. âAnd, why are you telling me?â You ask, and the lord shrugs.
âYou are involved in my life, in my son's life, bringing a wife into the home will not only affect me, but Mattheo and you. If I were to marry, Iâd have to find someone not only okay with me already having a son, but someone whoâd be fine with Mattheo seeing someone else as his mother, a nanny at that.â You slowly nodded, okay, you saw his logic there.
âOookay,â you murmured, twisting your lips to one side.
His gaze dropped to them without his realization before they flicked back up, the moment passed by without pause.
âI would request your help in helping meâŚfind a wife,â the lord ground out slowly, pinching his nose. You couldnât help the snort, and he gave you a withering look, and you turned your head, holding back a smile.
âAsking the nanny to help you find a wife? What would the old-fashioned wizards say?â You couldnât help but tease, and he rolled his eyes, stepping back as the oven timer rang, and you took the cookies out of the oven.
Eventually, you spoke again as he hadnât left the kitchen. âOkay, IâllâŚhelp, if I can. Someone who is fine with you already having a son, and a nanny who is your son's mother figure, shouldnât beâŚtoo hard?â you said, not sounding confident.
The lord let out a scoff, stealing a cookie, smirking as you gave him a look like you would Mattheo. âYes, not hard at all,â He muttered, taking his leave, and you sighed.
This would be fun.
It took another month and Abraxas needling Tom to finally start putting out adverts, which you thought was funny, putting out a marriage advert as if just looking for a nanny or cab driver. Women of all types arrived in droves, many of them were very nice, lots of them were fine with Mattheo, some even okay with you, but the lord sent them on their way anyway.
âThey werenât a good fit,â Heâd say when Abraxas gave him another exasperated look. Heâd also arrived to help Tom find a wife. There were, of course, the women who Tom could tell just wanted status, money, and power; with cruel intentions behind their eyes, some of them hid it behind a smile, some were upfront.
One had the audacity to order you to âshut the boy upâ when Mattheo was babbling away, and you personally hexed her out of the house.
Tom hid a smirk behind his teacup as you huffed, slamming the door. âBitch,â you muttered beneath your breath, and Tom inhaled his teaâcoughing as it went down the wrong pipe. Abraxas snorted, patting Tomâs back as he cleared his airways, and you returned to your spot with Mattheo on the couch, handing him back his toy.
âThis is hopeless, Abraxas, thisâinterview bullshiââ he stopped himself from cursing as you gave him a short glare, he cleared his throat, continuing as Abraxas smirked. He got the same look from his wife when almost cursing around Lucius.
 ââ is not going to work, only the money power hungry ones are going to end up in here, and if theyâre not that, theyâre not pleasant to (y/n) or Mattheo.â Tom grunted, and Abraxas sighed, brushing his platinum blonde hair back.
âI have to agree Tom, perhaps a more, personal route would bear more fruit,â Abraxas said, and Tom gave him an annoyed look. âIm. Not. Dating.â Tom practically hissed, and Abraxas only shrugged.
âThen I suppose you can say goodbye to being minister for magic,â Abraxas sighed dramatically, and Tom groaned, pressing his hand into his eyes as you excused yourself, leaving the room.
Abraxas smirked as Tomâs gaze followed you.
âAnd perhaps, your future wife is closer than you think?â Abraxas teased, but Tom only glanced, no hint of understanding in his eyes, and Abraxas had to hold back a sigh.
Slow burn it was.
-End!-
Pleeease! Give me ideas for silly things for these two to get into!! Or else Abraxas is just gonna shove them in a closet until Tom finally realizes his feelingsâŚthat or the order attacks the manor and it goes up in flames and (y/n) has a near death that has Tom confessing/realizing his feelings, idk vibes, but ideas! Please!
The thing about truth is, it doesn't care about want. You remembered late night conversations in the closet, back at the old Wool's Orphanage where martyrdom held more significance than any semblance of happiness. Tom, with his depression-woven skin, pale cheeks, and sadder eyes. The kind of eyes that sees. Knowing. The ghosts clawing through his gaze, and grenades creeped underneath open pores and rare imperfections.
The two of you fit together like puzzle pieces forced into conventional shapes. In that small space, was the only place where individuality was not taken away from your grips. You knew then, that you cannot go another day without choking backâI love you.
I feel it in my shoulders when I breathe, you would think. Tom, my Tom. He asked you why your hands ever so tremble whenever you'd sleep beside him because you had a nightmare, and there's this uneasiness lingering in the air, and all you had to do was say something to make it go away. But you thought it turned out to be the other way around. Tom's fingers softly tracing the creases of your forehead, almost furrowing but eyes softened when his gaze fell upon yours.
I don't think we'll ever see each other again after this, he said. It has come to seem there is no perfect ending. Then you replied, that's true. Because you believed it was. There is no other version of this story. Tom Riddle was going away, somewhere far you couldn't reach. And perhaps, you shouldn't have agreed so heartedly, or so quickly, is what you had come to regret. Not the truth, you should never regret the truth, but the expression. It was all you could muster up from the dryness of your throat, swallowed back feelingsâor none at all.
And you hold him, the idea of Tom, in your chest with devotion; every day a little brighter when you see each other, every night a little tender when the world is quiet and asleep, only then, you're alone together.
I love you, you wanted to say out loudâfor it to seem real, for Tom to really feel like you do. It's a painful thought, to know that you would choose not to leave because that's not the kind of person you were, and it aches to know he'd rather stay by your side and endure it all, that he accepts to be no more than a confidant with a swollen affection for someone that continually was a poison to everyone she surrounds.
You'd press your cheek against his cold skin, desperately clinging for some semblance of existence, a human body being real and next to you felt like an empty home. You shelter Tom's softness yet roughened edges, embracing to grasp the concept of love though quietly telling you to give up holiness in favor of ardency to warm up your being.
How do you stop the hurt, the physical craving for a limb that ceased growing a long time ago, a limb ripped apart from you the second longing manifestly settled itself onto your skin.
Tom will never hear about it but you'll disappear in the middle of the war, and he will have to carry a little bit of you in his bones, then you'll carry a lot of him to your grave.
tom sits at the head of the dining table, looking at all of his followers: the knights of walpurgis.
lestrange, black, avery, rosier, and malfoy. . . who is staring at him with a stupid little smirk on his face.
âyou are all dismissed,â tom says, clasping his hands together.
one by one, they all file out of the room - all of them except malfoy. again, what could he possibly want?
âcan i help you, abraxas?â he asks coldly.
âno, not at all, my lord.â abraxas grins. tom is smart enough to see something foolish lingering beneath his follower's expression. âyou see, i am in no need of assistance. it is not about what you could do for me, but what i could do for you.â
âwhat could you possibly have to offer me, abraxas? other than your gold - but must i remind you there are five other purebloods whose vaults i have access to?â
abraxas puts his hands in his pockets, letting out a sigh. âit is just you seem rather - tense, my lord. i only say this out of concern for your health and well-being. us - all of your dutiful followers have noticed it.â
tom clenches his jaw as he tries not to cast a crucio. âtense - how?â
abraxas purses his lips and shrugs, âi mean, lestrange and rosier can barely walk after their latest punishment - and that was not even their fault. you used to be far more lenient.â
tom feels a wave of anger wash through his mind, âare you questioning your lord's decisions?â
âno, my lord.â abraxas looks down sheepishly.
âthen do not bother me about such nonsense again, lest you would like to join lestrange and rosier.â
âof course, my lord. i apologize for overstepping.â he then pulls something out of his coat pocket: a slim, vibrant pink business card. he places it on the table and slides it over to tom.
abraxas gives him sly wink, âbut, just consider it,â he smirks, âthank you for your time, my lord.â he then saunters out the door with his stupid gait.Â
as soon as tom hears the door click shut behind him, he hesitantly picks up the card.
the sinful witches lounge! no disillusion spells needed ~ your secrets are safe with us.
ten galleons for door entry, twenty galleons to relax with our lovely witches ;), and fifty galleons for a private room.
prices are non-negotiable, and the usage of magic inside our establishment is strictly prohibited.
1445, knockturn alley.
he scoffs under his breath. did abraxas just give him the business card to a brothel? he should have expected nothing less from a malfoy - promiscuity was in their blood.
tom casts an inferno towards the card, watching the paper disintegrate into small pieces of ash.
he was going to be the most powerful wizard in the world. he does not care about being tense, and he has no time for frivolous activities such as sex. abraxas deserved an hour of torture for even having the confidence to suggest such a thing. and besides, tomâs reputation was far too high to risk being seen there.
his brain fumbles for a second, but abraxas is a malfoy, coming from generations of aristocrats, and he is presumably a frequent customer, so clearly there was no risk of sullying his reputation - no, no, he would not disgrace his dignity by going to such a place. . .
âÂ
tom stares up at the dingy building in front of him. to be fair, it looks inconspicuous - just another dark building in knockturn alley. he has his cloak covering his head, but he doubts anyone who frequents these streets would care about seeing him here.
he pushes the front door open, and the inside looks just like the outside: dark, dingy, and dilapidated. nothing like the obnoxious pink business card.
he sees a young witch sitting at a reception desk, prices are listed on the wall behind her, like it is some sort of cafe.
sheâs smacking on muggle gum, flipping through a magazine.Â
tom clears his throat.
her eyes slowly trail up, and when they meet his, a large smile grows on her face. âwell, hello there, handsome.â
he gives her an awkward nod as he pretends to look at the prices behind her.Â
âyou look awfully nervous, are you a first timer?â
tom swallows his pride and nods. âyes.â
âmmkay.â she raises a brow and leans over the desk. âso, for starters: no face concealments.â
tom reluctantly pulls his hood back, holding back a scowl.
âwas there something specific you were looking for today?â
tom did not even know why he came here today. he supposes he just wants to see if the recommended methods of stress reliefs were accurate, but how did that translate to picking a public or private dance?
the woman takes his silence as answer, âprivate room it is then. you look a little too conservative for all the public stuff.â
too conservative?Â
âsixty galleons, please.â she smiles, sticking out her hand. âand absolutely no refunds, obviously.â
tom grumbles, fishing through his pockets for his satchel of gold. he pulls out a handful of galleons - more than enough - and places it on the table.
the woman grins happily, pocketing the gold.Â
she sits up from behind the desk, gesturing for him to follow her. she leads him to a plain oak door, but once she mutters an incantation with her wand, it transfigures into a ruby red entryway.
when she swings it open, a loud bass immediately reverberates through his entire body. tom hesitantly follows, and is surprised to see how much larger the space is.Â
it is absolutely packed with people. various men and women are sitting at tables - laughing, dancing, drinking. and of course there is a large stage in the centre, with more than enough strippers on poles.
the woman laughs when she notices his ogling, she motions for him to keep coming.Â
she brings him to the furthest corner of the building where there is a beaded curtain leading to a hallway.Â
there are multiple doors, and she brings him in front of the first one on the left. there is a name card on the door - he reads your name out mentally, it sounds unfamiliar.Â
âa few rules: one, no magic, if that wasnât obvious. if even a lumos is cast, you will automatically be hexed and ejected from the building. two, be respectful of that lovely lady on the other side of the wall or you will be cursed.â she hums for a moment, thinking. âi believe thatâs all.â
âenter whenever youâre ready, and have fun, of course.â she winks at him before departing.Â
tom clears his throat as he enters the room. his mouth immediately goes dry when he sees you.Â
the only part of you thats visible is your lower half - but you are entirely bare and open. thereâs not a single inch of skin that is not visible to his eyes.Â
you are on your back, and both of your legs are hoisted in the air, spreading you wide. tom nearly groans when he sees the condensation collecting between your legs.
well, this was not what he was expecting. he finally understands how men get away with coming here, the intimacy rooms are entirely anonymous.Â
âhello.â he says because he is a respectful young man.Â
âhi.â you reply, your voice is slightly muffled from the other side of the wall.
tom takes a tentative step forward, only a foot away from you. he feels like an idiot, he does not even know where to start or what to do.
âcan i touch you?â he asks softly.
you giggle, "isn't that why you're here?â
he huffs out a laugh; he supposes that is true.Â
his shaking hands come to rest on the back of your thighs, trailing up to your calves, feeling the smoothness of your skin.Â
âyour hands are so cold.â you whisper.
âsorry,â tom reluctantly pulls his hands away.
âi can warm them up for you. . .â
âi thought magic was prohibited?â
âit is,â you say slyly, âi want you to warm them up in my cunt.â
tom freezes, it is like your words had some sort of spell on him, because all of a sudden every single ounce of blood falls straight to his groin, where he can feel himself rapidly hardening.Â
his hands slowly come down to the back of your thighs once more, trailing them down once they meet the crevice of where your thighs meet your hip.
he leans down to get a closer look, and he does not know what possesses him, but he parts his lips and lets a glob of saliva drop from his lips. it lands directly on your clit, and tom brings his thumb to follow, rubbing his saliva into your wetness.
you let out a surprised gasp in response, and he takes that as an invitation to start rubbing firm circles on your clit.
âis this what you meant?â he asks, genuinely curious.
âyes,â you moan out.
he then lowers himself to his knees in front of you. he is grateful for the wall, because he would never be caught dead on his knees for someone.
tom opens his mouth slightly as he just stares like a stupid virgin. he watches your cunt twitch as his hot breath fans across your folds.
he leans forward and hesitantly licks your clit, groaning when the taste of your arousal hits his tongue. he is immediately hooked. his second taste is an open mouthed kiss on the entirety of your cunt, his jaw flexing as he keeps licking.Â
you are anything but silent on the other side of the wall, loud moans of yes, please, yes, fill tomâs ears.
he is not stupid, so he takes that as motivation to keep going. he moves his hands to your hips, using them as leverage to pull you closer to his face.
his tongue does not rest, and his continues circling it around your clit, once in a while flicking down to your hole. your wetness slowly starts to increase, and your cunt has really just turned into a mess. tom cannot believe that he did not do this sooner, he might have just found a new hobby, because it truly is better than simply fucking a witch.
your moans increase in volume, and tom takes that a sign you are getting close. he lowers his tongue to your hole, entering it with a firm push, and the same time, he brings his thumb back to your clit rubbing in a delightful pressure. his tongue goes in and out and in and out, and you clench down as you scream, finally climaxing.
but, tom does not stop, he keeps fucking your hole with his tongue, and his thumb refuses to stop abusing your clit. he is absolutely entranced, and he does not think he could stop if he wanted to.
finally, when your legs begin shaking, and your words turn into a blabbering sob, does he finally pull away.
âwas that good for you?â
âyes, yes, please fuck me now.â
tom bites his lip as he rises to his full height once more. his hips are perfectly aligned with yours. he stares down at the obvious tent in his slacks, as he comes forward to press himself against you once more.
as soon as your cunt comes into contact with his clothed erection, you begin using your hips to eagerly grind yourself against him. the mess between your legs is surely soiling his expensive trousers, but tom cannot find it in himself to care.Â
he lets out a choked gasp as your hips roll against his.
âyou feel so good.â you moan.
tom loses himself in the sensation of you giving his cock attention, it has been months since tom has indulged in anything remotely sexual, and heâs not sure how much longer he will last if you keep this up - and he has not even properly fucked you yet.
âwait,â tom whispers.
his hands drop to his belt, immediately undoing it, before tugging down his pants and boxers together. his cock springs up, flushed red at the tip. he has never been this hard before.Â
he strokes himself once before dragging his tip between your folds, purposefully applying pressure to your clit, before dragging it down to your entrance. yet, he still does not push inside, instead repeating his ministrations, dragging himself up and down.
âstop teasing.â you murmur.
and before you can say anything else, tom slips into you fully. with how wet you are there is practically no resistance as he rests his cock balls deep inside of you.
you gasp at the sudden intrusion, and tom has to stop himself from groaning at the sensation. his hands come to your hips, gripping your flesh so tightly his knuckles turn white. he needs some form of leverage - something to hold onto and ground himself so he does not immediately cum.Â
âmove.â you say.
âyou are quite bossy,â tom laughs, shaking his head.
you whine, âplease.â
begging does seem to always do it for tom. he slowly retracts his hips, waiting until only his tip remains before entering once more with a deep thrust.Â
you both moan at the same time, and tom continues with his slow and deep thrusts. with every movement of his hips, he hears the squelch of your arousal and his precum mixing together.
when your legs start twitching, he increase his pace, beginning to fuck you in earnest.
âyour cunt is worth so much more than sixty galleons.â he whispers, bringing his thumb to your clit once more.
you moan in response, as he begins to rub circles on your clit, continuing to thrust into you, pushing your body backwards with the roughness of his movements.
âiâm close,â you whisper, feeling the precipice of your orgasm approaching.
âfuck,â tom says.
he does his best to restrain his orgasm, as he fucks you harder and resumes his movements on your clit. your wanton noises increase in volume, and before he knows it he feels an intense rush of liquid coating his cock, and your cunt clenches down on him firmly, nearly trapping him in place.
he refuses to stop his movements, elongating your pleasure while chasing his own orgasm.
âare you going to cum in me?â you ask innocently.Â
âdo you want me to?â
âyes, please.â he nearly moans at that. âi want you to fill me up.â
again, it is like your words have some sort of magical effect. his balls tighten and he feels like he is floating when he finally releases in you. his hips continue moving absentmindedly, stuffing you with more of his cum.
you are both breathless for a few seconds, and tom reluctantly pulls back. this is what he had paid for after all. he tucks himself back into his pants, and watches your swollen, red cunt begin to drip with his seed.Â
his hand comes to your folds once more, you flinch in response, but he ignores your protests of being too sensitive as he rubs his cum into you.
âhow much do i have to pay to see your face when i fuck you?â he murmurs.
âÂ
abraxas attends the next meeting with a buzz of anxiety.Â
he realizes now that he was possibly being a bit too overzealous when he suggested the witches lounge, but it truly did come from a place of honest concern for someone he cares about.Â
his throat bobs as he enters the formal dining room. he is not entirely sure what he is expecting: perhaps tom will crucio him, hex him, or even send an avada his way.Â
but, his eyes nearly widen when he sees tom smiling at a joke rosier makes. and it was not one of those polite, strained smiles tom often did, abraxas could actually see his dimples.
what the bloody hell. . .
âabraxas,â tom says, still smiling, âit is nice to see you have joined us today.â
âof course, my lord.â abraxas tentatively sits down, trying his best to conceal his bewilderment.Â
he sits awkwardly at the table, his hands folded in front of himself. he is far too nervous to engage in any sort of conversation.Â
âabraxas,âÂ
âyes, my lord?â he swallows a breath, trying his best to appear collected. he is waiting for the crucio, or the punishment. tom is surely about to send him on another terrible mission to moscow.
âthank you,â tom says casually, lifting his glass of whisky.
the rest of the wizards around them look perplexed as the all exchange confused glances - but abraxas knows. tom really did take his advice. and it seemingly worked because he does not think he has seen tom look this relaxed since first year.
before he can stop himself, he laughs. âany time, my lord.â
Jacaerys Velaryon x wife!reader - House of the Dragon (spoilers for s3 ep1!!)
Summary: Jacaerys survives the Gullet, so naturally the maesters have opinions about what he should and should not be doing during his recovery. Unfortunately for them, Jace has opinions too.
A/N: this works as a standalone or sequel to Saltwater, except this fic is significantly less angsty and significantly more "what if jace spent a month trying to argue with medical professionals." :) must admit i cracked myself up a lil writing this and also PLEASE send in reqs im running out of ideas
MASTERLIST - REQUESTS (open) - WC: 4.0k
A month after the Gullet, the castle still smells faintly of medicines, as though the sea itself has followed Jacaerys home and settled in the stone with him.
You have grown so accustomed to it that you hardly notice anymore.
A month ago, you would have given anything to smell it. A month ago, there had been blood. So much blood. But now there are only maesters, all the time.
Three of them stand gathered around the table right now near the window, speaking in low, serious voices while Jace sits in a carved chair looking increasingly irritated with every minute.
Sunlight spills through the narrow panes behind him, catching in his dark curls and turning the edges of them gold, softening him in a way that makes him seem almost boyish despite everything he has endured in the last couple weeks.
His injuries have faded from terrifying to merely alarming. The worst of the bruising is gone, the cuts have begun to heal, and colour has returned to his face, though not yet enough for you to relax.
Unfortunately for everyone else, so has his stubbornness.
You stand beside him with one hand resting lightly on the back of his chair, partly affection but mostly precaution if you're being honest with yourself, because the prince has developed an unfortunate habit of forgetting that nearly dying is supposed to slow a person down.
"Your Grace is recovering admirably," Grand Maester Gerardys says at last.
Jace straightens immediately, as if the words themselves have restored him. Gerardys clears his throat with the patient air of a man who has spent his life delivering unwelcome truths to the powerful. "Recovering admirably, however, does not mean recovered."
Jace slumps back with all the theatrical suffering of a man condemned to the Wall. Gerardys continues as though he has not noticed the prince's offence.
"Your ribs are still mending. The wound to your side has not fully healed. The fever has passed, but weakness remains. Any unnecessary strain could set back his recovery considerably."
Jace folds his arms. "What strain?"
The three maesters exchange a glance, and you immediately become suspicious. Jace notices it too, his brows drawing together. "What strain?" he repeats, sharper this time.
Nobody answers.
The silence stretches, and stretches, and then stretches a little further, until finally the old maester clears his throat again, looking faintly pained. "This includes physical exertion."
Jace nods at once. "Yes, I gathered that, obviously."
"Excessive physical exertion."
"Yes."
"Particularly..." Gerardys pauses, and one of the younger maesters suddenly finds the floor fascinating. "...marital exertion."
The room falls completely silent.
For a single moment Jace simply stares at them. Then his face changes all at once, horror and outrage arriving together.
"I beg your pardon?"
You turn away quickly because you can already feel laughter rising in your throat and you know if you let it out now you will never stop. Beside you, Jace looks scandalised beyond measure. "What do you mean?"
"My Prince-"
"No." The word echoes off the stone walls. "Absolutely not. This is absurd and I refuse to accept it."
Gerardys remains maddeningly calm. "It is only temporary."
"Temporary?" Jace sounds personally betrayed. "You are forbidding me from bedding my own wife."
The younger maester goes slightly red. You stare very intently at the tapestry across the room, because if you look at Jace now you will lose whatever dignity you have left. He points an accusing finger at the entire collection of healers. "I survived a naval battle."
"Indeed."
"I was shot."
"Yes."
"I nearly drowned."
"Correct."
"And your conclusion is that my greatest threat is my wife?"
The maesters look vaguely embarrassed. Jace looks outraged. And suddenly, despite the lingering ache that still lives in your chest whenever you remember the sight of him bleeding on a bed, you feel lighter, because this is familiar. This is your Jace. He's alive enough to argue and complain. Alive enough to glare dramatically at innocent old men and be stubborn.
Your hand slips from the chair to his shoulder, and immediately he covers it with his own. Gerardys notices, and his expression gentles. "My Prince," he says, "the restriction is not punishment."
Jace groans. "I would beg to differ."
A few of the maesters smile despite themselves. Gerardys gathers his papers, "It is only another month."
Jace nearly chokes. "A whole month?"
"Perhaps less, if recovery continues."
"A month."
"You survived the Gullet. Surely you can survive a few more weeks."
Jace mutters something deeply disrespectful under his breath, and you squeeze his shoulder in warning and affection both. His fingers immediately tighten around yours as he looks up at you, exhaustion and frustration playing on his features.
You smile at him, and his expression softens immediately.
Then Gerardys speaks again, and the spell breaks at once. "And separate beds may also be advisable."
Jace's head snaps around, "No."
Silence settles over the chamber. Jace's hand remains wrapped around yours, firm and warm and immovable. "I nearly died, so I am not sleeping without my wife."
They exchange glances and then, wisely, surrender. "Very well."
You lower your head to hide your smile, because truly, there are battles even the maesters cannot win.
That evening the matter should have been settled, at least in theory.
The maesters had spoken, their instructions delivered and their warnings had been repeated no fewer than six times over supper, as though saying them often enough might somehow make Jace more inclined to obey.
Instead, he is attempting to negotiate, which is perhaps exactly what you should have expected from him and yet still feels faintly absurd when he is sitting there shirtless on the edge of the bed, looking incredibly offended by the very concept of restraint.
You sit beside him with a fresh roll of linen in your lap while he holds one arm lifted so you can reach the wound along his side.
The chamber is quiet except for the crackle of the fire and the distant, steady sound of waves striking the cliffs below; night has fully settled beyond the windows, leaving only darkness on the other side of the glass and the warm gold of candlelight within.
Carefully, you peel away the old bandage, and he hisses through his teeth at the movement. You glance up at once. âYou are being dramatic.â
"Three arrows pierced my body.â
âA month ago.â
âIt still counts.â
You make a skeptical sound and reach for the ointment, though you cannot quite keep the corner of your mouth from twitching. For a few moments silence settles between you. You smooth the salve across healing skin, studying the angry scar that is beginning to form there, the sight still makes something twist painfully in your chest.
There are moments when you look at him and see only Jace; your husband, your best friend, the boy who once raced you through castle corridors and stole lemon cakes from the kitchens with the shameless confidence of someone who had never once been told no in his life.
Then there are moments like this, when memory comes back all at once and with it the blood, the fever, the endless waiting, the terrible certainty, however brief, that you might lose him. Your fingers pause before you can stop them.
Immediately, his hand settles over yours.
He notices. Of course he does.
You lift your eyes, and his expression softens at once. âI am all right,â he says quietly.
âMm.â
His thumb brushes slowly across your knuckles.
Then, because Jacaerys Velaryon possesses the survival instincts of an overconfident golden retriever, he says, âI still think the maesters are being unreasonable.â
You close your eyes for a brief, weary moment. You had been wondering how long it would take.
âYou are recovering from grievous injuries.â
âI am recovering exceptionally well.â
âYou still tire walking up stairs.â
âWell, I dislike those stairs.â
You begin wrapping the fresh bandage around his ribs. âThey are not unusual stairs, Jace.â
"They are steeper than other stairs."
Despite yourself, you laugh, and his grin appears immediately. He tilts his head, thoughtful in the way that always makes you suspicious.
âWhat exactly constitutes marital exertion?â
You nearly drop the bandage. âJacaerys.â
âIt is a reasonable question.â
You finish tying the linen perhaps just a little tighter than necessary, and he winces. You feel no guilt whatsoever.
âThey were quite vague,â he says after a moment.
âThey were not vague. They were, in fact, extraordinarily clear.â
Jace considers this with the air of a man weighing evidence in a trial he has already decided to win. âPerhaps to you.â
âTo everyone.â
âNot to me.â His smile widens, and you are suddenly struck by the realisation that the maesters should perhaps have prescribed confinement in separate castles.
âThey said strain,â he says, as though he's continuing a perfectly sensible conversation.
âYes.â
âAnd exertion.â
âYes.â
âSo theoretically-â
âNo.â
âWhat if-â
âJace.â
He stops, though only because he is laughing now, actually laughing, and the sound fills the room so easily that for a moment you forget everything else.
âYou are impossible,â you inform him.
âI have been told.â
He reaches for your hand, and you let him take it. His fingers close around yours with a warmth that feels almost unbearably familiar, and when he speaks again his voice has lost its teasing edge. âAnother month is a very long time.â
You shake your head, smiling softly, but before he can begin constructing another ridiculous argument, you lean forward and press a kiss to his mouth.
The effect is immediate. Jace falls silent, blessedly, wonderfully silent, and when you pull back he blinks once, then twice, as though he has forgotten every thought he was having.
A second kiss lands at the corner of his mouth, then another against his cheek, and with each one his smile grows slower, softer, warmer, until by the third he has entirely abandoned his campaign against the maesters.
You feel rather proud of yourself.
He grins and reaches for you, and you allow him to pull you nearer. The blankets shift around you both as you settle beside him carefully, because he is still healing and you are both painfully aware of it.
His arm slides around your waist. Your head finds its familiar place against his shoulder.
The first week after the maesters' decree is irritating.
The second becomes ridiculous.
By the third, it's infuriating.
Jacaerys Velaryon approaches recovery the way he approaches every obstacle in his life: by refusing to accept that it is truly an obstacle at all.
If the maesters insist upon restrictions, then he will simply find exceptions.
One evening, as you sit beside him on the bed with your book open in your lap, he glances over and says, almost casually, âI stand by my opinion that their instructions were imprecise.â
You do not look up. âNo.â
âThey never actually provided definitions.â
You turn a page. âThey are maesters, Jace, not scholars debating philosophy.â
He sighs, long-suffering and theatrical, and shifts a little closer.
Recently, he has become fond of finding excuses to sit beside you, or hold your hand, or drape an arm around your shoulders, or rest his head in your lap while insisting he is 'too weak' to move despite having spent the entire afternoon arguing in council.
âWhat if,â he begins. You close your eyes.
âWhat if,â he repeats, undeterred, âthe concern is specifically overexertion?â
âIt is.â
âThen surely the solution is simply avoiding overexertion.â
At last you lower the book and look at him properly. His expression brightens at once, as though he has won something merely by drawing your attention.
âJace.â
âYes?â
âNo.â
He groans, and you return to your book.
Three nights later, he appears to have developed a new argument. You discover this when he is sprawled across the bed with his head resting against your shoulder, warm and comfortable and entirely too pleased with himself.
âWhat if,â he says thoughtfully.
You nearly laugh. âAgain?â
âI have had several days to refine my position on the issue.â
âGods preserve me.â
âWhat if I simply did not move very much? You could do all the... moving... uh, like difficult parts.â
You lower your embroidery hoop and glance down at him. He looks entirely sincere, which somehow makes it worse.
âJacaerys.â
âI am not going to do any part because we are not going to do anything.â
He studies the ceiling for a moment, then turns his head just enough to look at you. âI think you are dismissing my proposals too quickly.â
âI think you enjoy hearing yourself talk.â
âI enjoy talking to you.â
Oh, you hate how good he is at being charming.
His arm slips around your waist. âYou know,â he says quietly, âI do understand why youâre worried.â
The humour fades a little. You look at him, but his gaze remains fixed on your joined hands.
âYou frightened me,â you admit.
Something flashes behind his eyes. âI know.â
Silence settles between you, gentle and sad and comfortable all at once. Then, because he is incapable of allowing a serious conversation to remain serious for too long, he lifts his head and says, âSo that is still a no?â
You stare at him.
Jace immediately begins laughing, and when you throw a cushion at his face he catches it easily, looking delighted by the rejection.
Which, unfortunately, only convinces you that recovery is proceeding exceptionally well.
One morning at the beginning of the fourth week you're standing at the edge of the bedchamber, the salt-laced wind moaning through the open shutters as the last embers in the hearth crackle low.
Jacaerys is desperate today, even more than usual
He lies propped against the pillows, his bare chest rising and falling with quick, restless breaths, the angry red scars along his ribs and hip still mapped in fresh pink, but they are scars now, nonetheless.
It's been two months since the Gullet.
To the naked eye he seems fully recovered â he partakes in council meetings, goes on long walks with you along the shore, is no longer winded by those particularly steep stairs â but the maestersâ edict remains iron.
No strain, no exertion, no touch that might tear what they say has barely knit. Yet here he is, dark eyes fixed on you with shameless hunger, voice low and frayed.
âPlease,â he murmurs, the words thick with frustration, his hand extended, palm up, fingers flexing as if he can already feel the shape of your waist.
âI cannot do this, Iâm not some broken thing anymore. I feel you every night in my dreams, and then I wake up and you won't even let me touch you properly. I need your hand, your mouth, anything. Just⌠let me feel you again.â
He sits up a little straighter, a small grin finding his lips, voice dropping to a growl. âYouâre aching too, I know it. Two months without feeling how wet you get for me-"
"Jacaerys, stop being so crude, you cannot possibly think-" but he continues, completely disregarding your objections.
"Gods, Iâd give anything to see you under me like I used to, but I wonât move. I swear it. Just you, I'll even lie still.â
Your fingers tighten on the bedpost, because you cannot dent he's right. You do miss him, painfully so. You miss the feel of his hands on you and the stretch of him inside you, but reluctance still coils tight in your chest.
You take one hesitant step closer.
The cool stone floor beneath your bare feet gives way to the softness of the mattress as you perch carefully at his uninjured side, your fingers brushing the edge of the linen without yet touching him.
âJacaerys,â you whisper, âI cannot, the maesters said-â But the way his hips twitch, just once, desperate and involuntary, stops the protest on your tongue.
A soft, helpless sound escapes him, and something shifts inside you, because this, in a way, is also him in pain, except this time you actually have the power to help him.
Your hand drifts over the sheet, hovering just above the bulge you can just start to see emerging beneath the linen.
âYou must promise me youâll lie perfectly still,â you remind him, the words gentle but unyielding, âThere are reasons they forbid it; you could open one of the wounds.â
His dark eyes flash, jaw tightening as if he might argue, but apparently the months of forced stillness have left him too raw, too aching, and he nods once, a bead of sweat tracing down his temple.
You smile then, small and maybe a little teasing, and let your fingertips graze the linen over the head of his cock.
Slowly you peel the sheet down, then work on the laces of his breeches before pulling them down and finally revealing him fully to the firelit air.
His cock thick and flushed dark, the vein along its length pulsing visibly as you wrap your fingers around the base with deliberate lightness, still not quite sure how this is going to go.
He groans, low and broken, head tipping back against the pillows, but he holds himself rigid as promised, muscles trembling with the effort.
You lean in, breath ghosting over the sensitive head, and press the softest kiss there, tasting the salt of him while your free hand rests lightly on his uninjured hip to remind him of the boundary.
âOnly on my terms tonight, dearest husband,â you whisper against his skin, stroking him once, slow and torturous, savouring the way his breath hitches and his fingers clutch the bedding instead of reaching for you.
âI will give you this, you just lay there and let me take care you.â
You tighten your grip just enough to draw another shuddering groan from him, your thumb circling the slick head of his cock in slow, deliberate strokes that make his thighs tense against the sheets.
Heâs so hard it must be painful, the heavy length twitching in your fist with every pass,
The sight of your big, strong husband, normally so commanding, now reduced to biting his lip to keep from thrusting stirs something warm and aching in your chest.
It feels like the biggest relief.
You still remember every moment of the last two months, watching him wince at every breath, lying awake beside his bandaged body while fear gnawed at you both, and now here he is, flushed and leaking for you, trying so hard to obey even as his hips give one tiny, involuntary roll.
Itâs adorable, that stubborn flicker of dominance surfacing in the way he grits out your name, only for it to dissolve into a whimper when you lean down and drag your tongue along the underside of his shaft.
His fingers fist the bedding harder, knuckles white, and you can see the war in his eyes, the urge to grab your hair and guide you deeper warring with the maestersâ warnings and his own fragile healing.
âFuck⌠just like that,â he rasps, voice cracking with need so raw it makes your own neglected body clench.
You take him deeper into your mouth, hollowing your cheeks with a soft suck that has him arching his head back.
It's as if you're watching him heal in real-time, because heâs becoming himself again, that fierce, passionate man who once pinned you laughing to the furs.
You hum around him, savouring the salt-bitter taste of him while your free hand strokes soothing circles over his tightening stomach.
You pull off just enough to murmur against the flushed skin, teasing the slit with the tip of your tongue until his breath stutters.
âStill, Jace.â
Then you resume your rhythm, slow, twisting strokes of your hand paired with wet, deliberate licks. He trembles beneath you, every suppressed sound proof of how desperately heâs craved your touch.
You quicken your pace with deliberate mercy, not seeing a point in dragging this out any longer than you have to, lips sealed tight around him as your tongue swirls and your hand pumps in steady rhythm, feeling the way his thighs quake despite his vow to stay still.
His voice breaks on your name, half-command and half-plea, while one of his hands finds your hair and grips tight, not that you mind at all.
Finally, he spills hot and pulsing across your tongue, thick spurts you swallow with a soft moan of your own. You keep stroking him through it, gentling your touch as the last tremors fade, watching the tension drain from his battered body until he lies boneless and breathless, dark eyes glassy.
For a long moment afterward, neither of you says anything.
The chamber is quiet except for the soft crackle of the fire and the distant rhythm of the sea beyond the windows. The candles have burned lower than either of you realised, leaving the room washed in warm gold and shadow.
Jace lies beside you with that same dazed, contented smile still lingering on his mouth, as though he has not quite remembered how to put it away.
You glance at him from the corner of your eye and shake your head. âWhat?â
His smile only deepens. âNothing.â
âMhmm.â
He gives a quiet, breathless laugh and reaches for your hand where it still rests atop his stomach, threading his fingers through yours. His thumb moves over your knuckles, warm and absentminded.
The sight of him like this, softened and unguarded, makes something in your chest loosen.
You fuss over him out of habit more than necessity, fetching a washcloth, straightening the blankets around his hips and making certain he is comfortable, searching his face and posture for any sign that he has overdone himself despite every promise he made.
Jace watches the whole business with open affection, his expression growing gentler by the moment.
âMy darling,â he murmurs, though there is no real complaint in it. You ignore him. âYou are checking on me.â
âSomeone has to.â
His teasing fades then, leaving something softer in its place. For a moment he simply watches you, and when he lifts your joined hands and presses a kiss to your knuckles, the gesture is so familiar that it catches you off guard all the same.
âThank you,â he says quietly.
You look up at him.
The words are not playful nor triumphant, not even particularly clever. Your chest aches unexpectedly, because beneath all the bargaining and persistence and impossible shamelessness, you know what this has really been about.
Weeks of fear. Weeks of recovery. Weeks of being careful. Weeks of wondering whether life would ever feel normal again.
You squeeze his hand, and his fingers tighten around yours at once.
âYou do not need to thank me.â
âI do.â
His voice is gentle. âI know I was insufferable.â
You giggle softly. âDo you now?â
Without either of you needing to say anything, Jace opens his arm toward you. You move into it at once, as naturally as breathing, as though you have done it a thousand times before. Because you have. Your head settles against his shoulder, his arm folds around your waist, and the blankets shift around you both as you settle more comfortably together.
Eventually you feel his lips brush lightly against your hair, a sleepy, lingering kiss that makes you smile before you can stop yourself.
âTired?â you murmur.
âA little.â
âYou should sleep.â
âSo should you.â
The waves continue their endless song beyond the walls.
somehow i ended up writing a several-thousand-word account of jace velaryon attempting to find loopholes in doctor's orders. i regret nothing <3 lemme know if you guys liked this, trying to decide wether to write more for jace or not.
i think if multiple of the slytherin boys had a crush on you, they would have a conversation as soon as they found out and say that a silly crush shouldnât divide them and they should all play fair. whoever gets you, gets you and the rest should respect that. may the best man win.
its maybe an hour after that when blaise catches mattheo telling you what a horrible dating history theodore has. the next day draco overhears enzo telling you how all his friends are brutes that you should stay away from, except for him of course.
turns out âplaying fairâ only means no magic to influence your decision. everything else is fair game, no matter how dirty they may play.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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⥠TW: noncon, toxic relationship, misogyny, chauvinism, possessiveness, controlling behaviour, other toxic traits, sorta spineless reader, but not really
⥠FEM reader
⥠PS: sorry to anyone named Franny or Carrie. The story required a couple of girl names.
You're on your way home in the dark.Â
It rained while you were at the club, having power-washed the asphalt now glittering under the moonlight. It's pretty when it's like this, but as a woman you can't help but feel a little on edge.Â
Your heart isn't entirely in your throat, but itâs definitely somewhere up there. Heels moving hurriedly, unbothered about splashing in shallow puddles as you stomp decidedly in a pathway straight home.
Drunken groups loiter around as the clubs all close up for the night, some hollering about grabbing a bite, others about grabbing some ass, and all you can think is hopefully, not your ass.
You could have gone home with a friend insteadâit would have been smarter maybe, and by smarter you mean saferâbut youâre getting older and the older you get the more the urge to sleep in your own bed at night becomes a necessity more than a preference.
Footsteps are all over the place, walking in different directions. Pat, pat, pat, pittering just like the rain. Aside from a few icky stares thrown your way and a handful of catcalls youâre not sure were for you or for some other poor girl, youâre starting to rest easy, knowing youâre nearly there.Â
But then you single out a pair. Pat, pat, pat, just behind you.
You cast a glance over your shoulder. Heart, now definitively, in your throat, with shudders running through you at the sight of the hooded figure at your back.
You walk a little faster. Eyes skittering around to see if there are any others around to witness the worst of your fears. Seeing youâre alone, you pick up the pace even more. Any faster now and youâd be jogging. Yet, you donât want to be too presumptuous. After all, you donât know if the guyâs even following you. It would be rude to treat him like heâs already committed a crime, when he isnât guilty of anything other than walking home. And so, out of courtesy, you give him the benefit of the doubt and stick to power-walking.Â
Gratefully, you make it to your outergate. Keys already in your hands. You're happy to find the keyhole on your first try. Even so, with thoughts regarding the worst still unpleasantly lingering in the back of your head, when you pull the door to yourself, you make sure to crack it open just wide enough for only you to slip through. Wanting it to close behind you quickly, so that the automatic lock could do its job and shut out whoever it was that might be following you.Â
You skip along, through the passage leading to the inner-yard, paranoid with a simultaneous feeling of being silly for feeling paranoid, side-eying the gate again before you turn the cornerâutterly horrified upon what you catch in your peripheral.Â
Shit, fuck-fuck-fuck, he made it inside. It's official then, heâs definitely fucking following you.Â
This time you skip jogging and go straight to running to reach the door to your block. Hands shaking a little too much to make it on the first try this time, but somehow you manage in your scramble, making sure to pull the door closed behind you, hearing it click in place, signalling that itâs been locked tight. Despite it, just in case you still straight jump up the stairs, two at a time to reach your flat.
You canât see it, but you hear itâhow he makes it through the second door.
Feeling a mix of terror and confusion all at once. You donât understand, youâre certain you heard the door lock, but somehow now itâs open again. Your keys jingle as you steady them to open your door in a panic. Listening to the stranger climb the stairs. Once itâs open you nearly tumble inside your apartment, all but slamming it shut to lock itâonly⌠along with your keys, thereâs another pair jingling in the staircase.
That's when you realize. Heâs not following you. He lives here. Heâs your fucking neighbour.Â
He lives in the apartment under you. He lives in the apartment under you and youâd clearly just treated him like some sort of a criminal. Heâs your neighbor and youâd all but slammed two doors in his face and sprinted away from him.
Embarrassment takes the place of your fear, filling it with regret and guilt. âShit.â
But can he blame you though? Dressed like that? Dark hood hiding his face, like some sort of thief in the night. What were you supposed to do? Hold the door open for him and say âHeya there, mysterious stranger, you wanna come join me for a nightcap?â
âShit,â you repeat to no one but yourself. Now youâre just being sarcastic because you feel bad.Â
You sigh, then decide youâll apologize next time you see him. A most dreaded and most-certainly awkward event which turns out to be as soon as the next day.
âOh! Hey!â Newly awoken from your drunken slumber, youâd just stepped out after a failed mission to find some breakfast in your fridgeâhaving found it completely empty except for a couple of expired tubes of condiments. âHey, you!â
You rush down the steps, seeing the guy from last night lurking outside his apartment door, keys in hand like heâs just locking up to go as well. He pulls out his earphones once he sees you, a little taken aback by the sight of you panting, all out of breath in front of him.
Jeez, you need to start taking the gym more seriously, you think to yourself as you catch your breath. âHey, listen, Iâm realâ sorry âbout the other night. That was so rude and uncalled for,â you apologize. Face all riddled with embarrassment and guilt, smiling at him in the awkward hope of his understanding forgiveness.
The only problem is, heâs got no idea who you are or âWhatâre you on about?â
Oh, you pause, maybe he hadnât noticed you? Still, you start explaining, âLast night, or well, this morning I guess, we came home at the same time. I was sorta⌠nearly, kinda running away from you? I was drunk and paranoidâI didnât know you live hereâI should have held the door open. Anyway, I just wanted to say sorry.â
His chin tilts up in recognition after that, âAh, right, yeah,â then waves his hand, saying, âNo worries. I know how it is. Dressed the way you were, I'd have been scared too. Hardly recognized you without that little dress you had on.â
You look down at yourself, all covered up in baggy sweatpants and a hoodieâa far cry from yesterdayâs get-upânow make-up free, not to mention your hair in a messy updo. No wonder he didnât put two and two together.
âRight,â you giggle then, suddenly feeling embarrassed for a whole other reason. You were just going to pop in and out to the storeâyou hadnât exactly accounted for anyone to see you. âYeah, I was just gonna grab some breakfast. Morninâ after and all thatâneed something fatty, you know?â
He returns your smile, way cooler than you, eyeing you like heâs amused before offering, only with a small pause, âHow âbout we go to the bakery around the corner? I'll forgive you for yesterday if you pay.â
It stuns you. Thinking, thatâs brazenâa little impressed by his forwardness. Your smile gets brighter with another laugh. This was not the morning you were expecting. But heck, why not?
âAâright, sure,â you agree, before putting up your pointer, jokingly stating, âBut then we better be square.â
He whistles, âSounds good to me.â
And thatâs how you end up having breakfast with your downstairs neighbour.
And as you sit there, opposite each other, you let your eyes wander because holy cow, heâs absolutely massive. Youâd noticed when you were standing inside as well, but youâd been too busy making your awkward apology to really have taken him in.
No wonder your female heart was cowering in your chest last night, it must have sensed the size of the guy from the sound of his footsteps. You're completely flabbergasted how youâve never seen him before. Two meters easily, big broad shoulders with a back you could build a house on and two gigantic arms that could easily lift it straight above his head and toss it across a football field if he wanted to.
He's a cop, you learn over breakfast. He hits the gym early and comes home during the day or works the late shift and comes home in the morning, which explains why youâve never run into him except last night. Heâs a bit of a routine junkie, he admits.Â
And, well, though he doesnât come clean about it, itâs not hard to tell how heâs also a bit of a flirt.
âI gotta be honest, I thought youâd lost your pants or something,â he chuckles, smirking at you playfully from atop his coffee cup, forcing a permanent heat in your cheeks as well as a cramp from the bashful smile youâre unable to make settle through all his teasing.
âQuit bullying my dress!â you nearly whine. âItâs cute. You canât deny itâs cute.â
He gives a canât-argue-with-that type of shrug. âI mean, yeah, I've just never seen such a thing besides on film,â he says, then inquires, âWhat were you up to anyway?â
âOh, you knowâŚâ You pluck the last blueberry off your plate, wondering if you should order more pancakes. âJustâ at the club with some friends. Dancinâ.âÂ
Popping the berry in your mouth, you decide against another round as you suck the cream off your digitsâthinking you should show some restraint in front of the gym-freak across from you. You wouldn't want to come across as a complete glutton either.
Besides, just looking at him is a meal enough on its own, and you can tell heâs enjoying you the same way. And so, you lay it on extra thick for him. âIt gets hot in there, so the less you wear the better.â
He scoffs, âOh, really?â brows raised, grinning at your display. âYou sure it ainât got nothinâ to do with makinâ people look?â
You make a show out of getting offended with a fake gasp, before bringing forth your wrists. Your voice thick with sardonic theatrics, speaking your words through a pout, âWell, arrest me, officer. I didnât know that was a crime.â
Shaking his head, he chuckles some more at you. âNah, youâre good. But maybe I should come along to chaperone you next timeâyou know, make sure you get home all safe and sound.â
He takes another sip of coffee while watching his words and how they affect you. Yeah, he knows exactly what heâs doing, the scoundrelâyou know he knows, shamelessly making you gush like this.Â
You bite your lipâitâs all you can do to keep yourself from kicking your feet. A man hasnât flirted with you in broad daylight like this in some time, you donât even know how long, and youâre not going to lie, itâs making you weak.
âYou donât have work?â you askâperhaps a little too eager.
But he doesnât seem to think so, answering with charm, âI get time off just like everyone else.â
You bite your lip, trying to force yourself into acting casual even though youâre squealing on the inside, âOkay, sure, why not? But you gotta promise you wonât be all police-like and stuff though.â
He chuckles again. âDonât worry. Iâll leave my gun at home.â
Yeah⌠You end up dating.Â
In fact, you make pasta together and fuck that very same night. Multiple times, multiple positions, multiple rooms, and, most important of all, multiple orgasms.Â
Youâve never been with a guy like him, outside of your fantasies. A monster truck of a man, heâs practically herculeanâhe could literally carry you on his back up a mountain if he wanted to. So of course the sex is amazing. He puts you in all kinds of crazy states youâve never been in beforeâfull-nelson, pile-driver, standing missionaryâhe fucking rails you like a jack hammer until your positively destroyed.
Honestly you werenât too sure you liked muscle freaks who could manhandle you any way they want, but now you can say youâve been fully baptised into the church of size difference and youâre afraid there will be no going back.Â
Not only is he built for it, but heâs good at it too. He knows how to foreplay, how to get you going, how to tease and make you all hot and bothered and desperate for it. Not just sexy, but playful. Always joking when knocking on your doorâsaying FBI open up while posted there in his uniformâroleplaying with it, frisking you after putting you under arrest with real handcuffs, even using his gun sometimesâunloaded, of course.
Outside of sex, heâs a real gentleman too. Takes you out for datesâdinners, parks, movies. Tells you that you look good and wraps you in his jacket when youâre looking chillyâor when he spots other guys leering.
Heâs just a really good guy overall. You actually really like him. And thatâs saying a lot, given how many shitty dating situationships youâve had over the past years. This might be something real.
Is what you thought until, wellâŚÂ
After a few weeks, it's revealed he doesn't like it when you go out by yourself.
Itâs nothing, at firstânot something you pay much mind to. Heâs just a bit protective, is allâany decent man who cares for his girlfriend will show some instinct regarding her safety when heâs not around. Itâs normal.Â
Still though, you canât help that it rubs you the wrong way just a bit.
Itâs dangerous, heâll argue, and you canât really disagree when you've already admitted to being scared going home alone. But even though you know it comes from a good placeâthat heâs just looking out for youâitâs still a little⌠you donât know. Patronizing?Â
At least, thatâs what it feels likeâŚ
Then again, he doesnât strike you as very traditional. Heâs supportive of your studies, comfortable watching chick flicks with you, doesnât care when you dress like a slob, joins you shopping, cooks for you, he even goes down on you. Like you said, heâs a good guy. And you really like him.
But shit⌠this increasing need of his to chaperone your every move? Youâre not going to lie, itâs getting a little annoying.
âGoing somewhere?â he stops you on your way out.
Youâd given one another the keys to each otherâs apartment some time ago now, and heâd taken it as an invitation to come by anytime he wanted. You thought it was sweet at first, and you still doâyour schedules donât always line up, so itâs nice to keep it easy-access. Itâs just, you already told him youâd be busy today.
âYeah, just out with some girlfriends,â you repeat, sitting down to put on the pair of strappy black heels youâd just bought, excited to hear what the girls will sayâalready hearing them go silly with cat-calls, howling compliments at you.
âLike that?â he questions, standing with his shoulder leaning against the wall and arms crossed over his chest.
You get up and do a spin, wearing a tight but classy black cocktail dress. âWhatâs wrong with this?â
He throws his brows up, scratching the back of his neck while stepping closer. âNothinâ.â He releases a sigh, dwarfing your waist in his hands, pulling you flush against him. âYou donât think it's a little dressy for a girlâs night?â
You pout, placing your chin on his chest, batting your lashes with puppy-dog eyes looking up at him. âI like looking nice, is that so bad?â
His hands travel, over the small of your back, down the dome of your ass, swaying with you in his arms. âNo. Of course not.â He sighs again, squeezing you tight. âI'm just jealous of whoeverâs gonna get to look at you all night.â
You smile, thinking, despite how it gets on your nerves just a bit, itâs still kind of cute how needy he is.
âWhereâ you going?â he asks, chin atop your crown, still keeping you close, as though charging himself up, knowing heâs going to be without you for the evening.
âJust the lounge down by the pier.â
He groans then, hauling you off by your forearms to give you a stern look. âYou know I don't like when you drink when I'm not around.â
You tilt your head and return his look with a softly patronizing one of your own, silently trying to tell him heâs being childish again like the two of youâd spoken about. Because you had told himâhow unreasonable it was. And as mentioned, you were beginning to get a little sick of having to tell him off about it.
When he doesnât say anything, you roll your eyes and show him enough sympathy to reassure him of how âItâs just gonna be a glass of wine.â
âMhâŚâ he hums, looking at you, not fully convinced. âGive me five minutes and I'll join you.â
âNo.â It slips before you give it much thought. And yet, even after having said it, despite it having been a bit rude, you still donât regret it or make any proceedings to take it back.
âNo?â he echoes. A little affrontedâto be expected.
Still, you donât let it deter you. âWell, itâs a girlâs night. You knowâŚâ you explain, hoping to appeal to his sense of reason. âIt would be rude if I brought you when the rest of the girls have left their man at home.â
It doesn't seem to persuade him. His face just scrunches, as though the entire idea of a girlâs night is absurd in and of itself, arguing, âTell âem to invite them then. Problem solved. None of you should be out on your own anyway.â
And itâs comments like that that really upset you. You bite your lip, trying to think of the most disarming responseânot wanting to fight it out right now, thinking you could bring it up later at a better time.
âI'll be home before ten. I'll only have one glass of wine. I'll take a taxi home. AndâŚâ You give him a playful smile as you wrap your arms around his neck and give the locks on his nape a light tug. âI'll make it up to you all night long.â
You feel his frame tense up at the offer, enticed by your words until he, at long last, finally grumbles out a defeated, âFine.âÂ
He releases you then, but doesnât leave you alone for too long before grabbing your chin.Â
âNo need for a Taxi, I'll come pick you up,â he says firmly, laying it forth like a condition to his allowing you to go. âStand ready outside at ten oâclock sharp.âÂ
Giving you a small kiss, he continues before you can voice any complaint.Â
âOr else I really will have to spend all night long punishing you.â
It gives you goosebumps. And yet, because you donât entirely hate the sound of it, you decide to treat it like a joke, and against reading all that deep into itâeven though youâre aware there might be some small truth behind the warning.Â
You know if your friends were to have heard it, theyâd probably disapprove, but come on⌠Being threatened with sex is harmless enough.Â
And so, you brush it off and play along, answering him with a bright and bushy-tailed, âYesâsir.â
To which he proudly smiles, âAttaâ girl.â
Despite promises made, that first glass of wine disappears quickly.Â
You never were much of a slow drinker. Not that youâre an alcoholic either, of course, itâs just⌠itâs hard pacing yourself when youâre in good company. And your girls? Well⌠letâs just say they know how to bring the party.
âAnother round of wine?â Franny declares more than asks.
You shrink back a little in your chair. Not only not wanting to be a bummer, but also fearing how theyâd most likely see right through it not being your decision, then actively begin to judge you for letting yourself be governed by your boyfriend.Â
Still, you shake your head and hope they might not catch on. âI shouldn'tââ
âWhat? Why?â Franny immediately boos, all but gawking at you from across the table like youâd just declared you were becoming a nun or something else equally baffling.
Carrie, on the other hand, doesn't seem surprised at all, throwing the rest of her wine back before mumbling, âOr else Mr. Officer will put her under arrest.â
Frannyâs head snaps to her at that, again, gasping, âWhat? Really?â
Carrie throws up a brow, cool like a mean-girl about it, âOh, you havenât heard?â before cocking her head back at you, putting you on the spot, âTell her then. Go on.â
You pout at her judgementalness, knowing you wonât be able to hide it either if she decides to pushâwhich she most certainly will. âCome on, heâs not that bad...â
Thatâs when her cool demeanor takes a twist, all but banging her glass on the table with her outburst, âGirl, be so real! Manâs a total chauvinist, you gotta break up with him.â
You werenât in the dark about her attitude regarding your relationship, so it doesnât exactly come as a big shock to hear her criticize it to your face. It wouldn't kill her to learn some tact though. Even so, youâre willing to forgive her, given you know her tolerance to be rather low and her need to be candid evidently very high.
âI like him,â you defend under her disapproving glare and Frannyâs wide-eyed stare, the both of them awaiting something more persuasive.
âBesidesâŚâ you drift, feeling the wine in your system forcing you to be a little more honest with both them and yourself. âHeâs my neighbour, you know⌠If I break up with him I'll still have to run into him.â
Carrie deadpans at that. Looking at your square in the eye with dull ones of her own, her mouth catching flies, back to being as suave as always while stating in a more-than-obvious manner, âStart looking for places to move.â
You sigh, pouting even more while you whine, âBut I like my apartment.â
Thereâs a moment of silence, as though in solidarity of your situation, letting you come to terms with what you have to do.
Franny lifts her glass after a moment. A sympathetic quirk on her lips, repeating, now suggestively in comfort, âAnother round of wine?â
You look at her, then at Carrie, who just shrugs, also with her glass in handâtone equally suggestive, âWe wonât snitch.âÂ
You bite your lip, letting their mischief rub off on you like you do so well. Smiling. âOh, fine. You win.â
The three of you chat more about each otherâs hopeless love pursuits, how no men are perfect, how friendship is so much more reliable, and how being alone might just be the only reasonable thing for any one of you.
You like him, but you can see Carrieâs point. Youâve had the same concerns yourself, despite not wording them as harshly as her. Of course you donât enjoy having to argue about going out with your friends or dressing the way you want.Â
Having to ask permission for such things doesnât make sense to you, and it never will. Youâre a grown woman who pays her own bills. You donât have to run your decisions by anyone. And even if you did feel the need, it would be out of pure considerationâsimply to keep the other person in the loop, and not something to be discussedâat the very least not something to be prohibited. Youâre not a prisoner, and youâre certainly no child either.
Shit, you donât know⌠maybe dating the guy in your building wasnât the brightest decision after all.
âI said ten,â he admonishes as you step towards the parking lot.Â
Itâs just gotten dark. Youâd hadnât seen him yet and so the sudden sound of his voice spooks you, making you slap a hand over your pulse with a gasp.
If he notices, he doesnât seem to mind. Not offering you an apology. Rather the opposite. Standing there, posted against his squad car with his arms folded upon his chestâstaring at you like some criminal, awaiting your confession.
âSorry, it took some time figuring out the billââ
âYou're drunk,â he cuts you off, shaking his head in disapproval as he goes to grab your purse in one hand and your upper arm in the other.
âNo,â you argue sharply, saying âI'm not drunk.â because you most certainly are not. In fact, between two glasses of wine and a whole meal, you wouldn't even describe it as being tipsy.
He ignores you while opening the door to the passenger seat, ushering you inside with a strict, âGet in the car.â
You have to roll your eyes. Sarcastically thanking him for not going so far as to place you in the back like an actual arrestee, muttering, âYes, sir.â under your breath.
He then even leans across you to put on your seatbelt, prompting you to almost push him off. Saying, âDude, chill. I had two glasses of wine. Like, howââ
âWe agreed on one,â he cuts you off again, making it very clear how little interest he had in hearing any of it.
Again, like his previous comments, it upsets you. In fact, itâs the last straw. âYeah? Well, youâre not the boss of me. If I want another glass of wine, itâs in my rights to fucking have one.â
You donât scream it, and yet, he acts like you do. Scolding you like youâre some child throwing a tantrum, nearly growling at you in return, âLower your voice. I'm not having this discussion with you if youâre going to be yelling.â
You can only scoff, completely flabbergasted by him and his behaviour. âUgh, youâre so infuriating sometimes,â you nearly shriek, though he shuts the door in your face before hearing it.
He gets in the driverâs seat, snaps his belt in place, and veers out of the lot in one swift movement. In any other circumstance, youâd find his capabilities assuringâmaybe even a little arousing. But, right now it only serves to piss you off.
The rest of the drive is silent. You keep your gaze fixed out of the window, not even acknowledging the way his wrist go white wringing the wheelâprobably sitting there waiting for you to beg his forgiveness or something stupid.
You donât know what to say. All you know is that youâre going home by yourself.Â
âGive me my purse,â you demand once youâre outside his apartment. Your hand stretched out, waiting for him to hand it to you. Youâd abandon it if it weren't for the unfortunate fact that your keys and your phone were both confiscated within it.
âYouâll get it once weâre inside,â he sighs, his entire back bulking with the action, standing with it facing you as he unlocks the door. Again, flat-out ignoring you as if you had no say in the matter.
âNo,â you protest, insisting, âI'm going to my own apartment, so give me my purse.â
With his hand once again around your upper arm, he tugs on you despite you planting your feet and pulling back. âDonât be difficult.â
You grab his wrist, trying to twist it off, but failing. âI donât need you to baby meâIâm not a fucking child.â
âOh yeah? You could have fooled me, standing here throwing a fit for everyone to hear.â He only tightens his grip, tugging you harderâso hard youâre forced off balance and nearly fall straight into him. âNow get your butt inside before I throw you over my shoulder.â
He doesnât give you any time or room to refuse, all but dragging you inside and placing you on the couch with a mean and very nearly brutal shove. âSit down.â
He then gets down on one knee in front of you. Hands lifting your foot onto his thigh as he begins undoing the straps to your heels.
âI can do that myselfââ you try to pry it away from him, but he only pulls it back into place.
âJust sit.â
You donât know what to do at that point. Eyeing him and the way he was positively radiating annoyance. Youâre equally frustrated, and still, you canât help but be struck with this sensation that it doesnât matter much when heâs more equipped in enacting his will.Â
In the end, you just sit there like heâd commanded, at a loss for what you could do or sayâand only getting more frustrated by it.
âNow this,â he declares once done, gesturing to your dress as he gets up, fingers clawing under the hem, beginning to pull it up.
âStop it already. I said I can do it myself!â Your hands are on his chest then, having had enoughâthis time officially. âUgh, just get off, Iâm going home!â
You donât know what happened, but something instinctual must have kicked in once it was clear he wouldnât listen, because suddenly, without warning, you kicked him in the shin in order to get him off.
But little good it does you...
In fact, it only makes the following events that much worse.
âWhat's gotten into you, huh? Acting so fuckinâ brattyââÂ
His hand is atop your mouth like a piece of duct tape, trapping all unwanted noise beneath it. Heâs got you lying on your back now, himself on top of you. Your dress balled up in his other fist, this time opting to rip it off rather than tug you out of it.Â
âI swear, nothing good ever comes from letting you women yap amongst yourselvesâyou always come back with so much attitude and dumb ideas I gottâa straighten out.âÂ
Your struggles seem to mean nothing to himâall efforts to thwart him, easily ignored.Â
âYou can bet your ass this is the last time I let you go anywhere with those sluts. I mean, just look at youâdressed like a fucking whore. A shitty fucking influence the lot of âem.âÂ
He succeeds in tearing the dress, throwing it across the floor like trashâpassing little consideration to the way it has you squirming beneath him with fat tears now streaming down your cheeks, soaking his fingers in a way that should have been enough to reconsider.
And yet, his eyes seem more concerned with your other articles.Â
âYou even wear pretty underwear for âemâfuckâs that about, huh?â Clicking his tongue, the frown on his face is enough to make your stomach churnâfully terrified of what he meant to do next.Â
âWhatâs left for me?â His eyes meet yours, demanding an answer from you even though your lips were sealed under his grip. âIf you go parading around for the entire fucking world to see, whatâs left?âÂ
His other hand balls up into a fist, then bangs against the back cushion to the side of your face, hard enough to make the entire couch skirt just a bit, making you let out a muffled scream, followed by a whimper as you shut your eyes hard and start praying.
âIâm the only one whoâs supposed to see you like this. Itâs supposed to be my fucking privilege. Something special for me to cherish.âÂ
You feel his touch return to you, and you tremble receiving it, despite it only softly stroking your skin in ticklish touches, down your chest and belly until stopping at the lace of your panties.Â
Thereâs a heavy sigh, loud enough for the pursuing silence to feel deafening.
âBut I guess⌠if youâre gonna act like a cheap whore, I might as well treat you like one.â
The quickening beat of your heart makes it hard to breathe while your eyes blow open wide at the feel of him tearing at the lace. Your sobbing turns more violent, while your hands fly to keep the flimsy garment in place.Â
âNo? You donât want that?â he mocks without humor, and you try your best to shake your head under his hold, every thought begging him to stop.Â
Teeth grit, he continues, âThen quit being difficult and start doing what I say. Can you do that?â
You peel your eyes open, now nearly choking on the tears clogging your nose. Sniveling as you give him pitiful nods, hoping it will suffice.
âGood,â he affirms.Â
His hold relents after that, just enough for you to be able to suck in a breath. Sill though, calming down takes you a moment, and even then you never fully manage completelyâjust enough to turn your sobbing into softer bleating.
He allows you the time to recover, before getting up and demanding the same of you.Â
âCome on. Bathroom.â
His handâs on your nape, guiding you like a leash and collar. You keep your head bowed, feeling exposed as you shuffle along just in front of him. Regarding him like a beast on your heels.
You enter the bathroom, where he positions you in front of the sink.
âLetâs get all this clown shit off.âÂ
His actions are gentler now, but they still feel anything but. Still making you sniffle as you stand there, knees wobbly, stuck in shock as he proceeds to find your makeup remover.
Your breaths are wintry as you stand there, both hands shaking, holding onto the white marble, staring into the drain, terrified to meet his reflection in the mirror above as he starts to drag a wet wipe over your cheeks and lips, rubbing your no-doubt ruined make-up off.Â
You watch as each cotton-cloth is discarded one after the other in the basin below, flecked with black mascara streaks and pink rouge, the latest one cleaner than the first few.
âThere she isâthatâs better,â he coos once done. Caressing your face in his hand as he lifts it up to look straight ahead.Â
You donât want to, but the way his fingers all rub against your jugular, is enough for you to take as a warning. Seeing yourselfâyour eyes puffy, lashes gathered in wet wisps, bottom lip trembling.Â
âMy pretty girl.â
He sags forward, lowering his mouth to your neck, kissing you there in slow but heavy mouthfuls. His other hand, the one not holding you by the throat, is snaked around your midriff with his arm across your body, pushing you against him and the way he angles his hips against your ass and grinds into you from the back.
âIâm sorry for getting upset,â he murmurs with a groan then, but itâs not an effective apology. âItâs just so frustrating, you know? To be here, worrying about you out thereâepsecially when you donât take any safety precautions. You justâŚâ His mouth reaches your ear, nuzzling the shell, his breath making it burn. âYou drive me fucking nuts.â
You donât dare reply. You donât dare do anything. You just keep clutching onto the sink, as though letting go would result in him pulling you away somewhere more dangerous.
âYouâre so cruelâalways leaving me with my dick in my hand.â His hands fall to your hips, his grip bruising as he kneads you against him and the hard thing jabbing itself against your ass.
âIâm sorryââ comes out of your mouth before you can think.
To which he releases a pent-up chuckle. âThatâs okayâŚâÂ
He rests his chin on his shoulder, mouth perfectly level with your ear with words holding onto something utterly horrid, saying, âItâs like you saidâyou can make it up to me.â