i get in the light of the sun and i am suddenly like, life has meaning and is beautiful actually

I heard biden is gonna take our cocks away

oh how sexy i'd be if i lived inside my body and not constantly a little up and to the left of it

love it when movies are under 1h 40m like yes girl get to the point

tumblr should add polls. it would get batshit insane so quickly and I want to be here for it

self undiagnosing there's nothing wrong with me

“this is the hill you want to die on?” oh no i just love arguing. i fully intend to leave this hill once it gets boring. sorry for the confusion!

if u need me ill be stealing lobsters from grocery store tanks 

I think it is brave and also very sexy of me to continue living

*driving in my smart car* Google glass, show me the nearest e-cig shop! *beeping sound* ugh no! Only show ones that accept Bitcoin!

this was considered an outlandish joke in 2014