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A Bump in the Road is a two-part (wip) series where instead of being outed, Shane gets pregnant. It will explore his decision to keep the baby, and how it affects their mental health and relationship both during the pregnancy and as new working parents.
The snippets are just rought drafts, so excuse mistake pls
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DING DONG
Ilya watches as Shane bounces on the spot, fingers tapping against his thigh and breath coming out ragged. He reaches out and grabs his hand. “It will be okay, Shane,” he reassures, rubbing his thumb over his knuckles. “They’ll be shocked, but they won’t be mad.”
Shane takes a deep breath and nods. “Yeah. Y-yeah, I know. Just gotta ease them into it.”
“Yes, lets not give David a heart attack.”
Shane giggles, but abruptly stops at the sound of the latch.
Yuna looks between the two of them in obvious shock. “Oh I wasn’t expecting to see you boys tonight,” she exclaims, gesturing them into the house. She pulls Shane into a hug as he passes, which he falls into rigidly. “Congratulations on the win tonight! You did great, sweetheart! Sorry for the loss, Ilya,” she adds as she pulls back, reaching out for another hug.
“Ah it’s okay. We’ve done good in the first few games, I’ll let him have this one,” he jokes with a wink.
“I thought I heard you two,” David says as he rounds the corner, drying his hands with a towel. “Perfect timing, we were just about to have some dessert to celebrate the win- and commiserate the loss, obviously.”
“Ooh, something good?” Ilya asks, peaking over David’s shoulder.
“Well, you’ll be pleasantly surprised to know that I’ve been practicing that sharlotka recipe, and I think this time I-”
“I’m pregnant.”
A sudden silence fills the room as all eyes turn to Shane, who’s watching the floor, shaking heavily and breathing as though he’s ran a marathon.
“That’s one way of easing them into it,” Ilya murmurs before stepping towards Shane, resting his hand on his shoulder. Shane’s head snaps up at the contact.
“I’m gonna throw up,” he declares, pushing past everyone to run further into the house.
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a lot of the centaurs learning that shane fucking hollander hockey robot is a YAPER. some of them are walking towards the locker room and as they get closer they start hearing very animated voices talking loudly and they recognizes ilya and shane’s voices and shane is explaining something to ilya and ilya is laughing hard at that and they’re just going back and forth about this topic and having fun with it and then the teammates finally round the corner and walk in and see ilya sitting on the bench half dressed fishing to putting his hockey gear and shane standing up gesturing with his hand talking very animated and still in his compression clothes and then it hit them that they genuinely didn’t know nothing about shane outside his PR image and they learn that not only shane talk loudly and a lot but shane and ilya are genuinely best friends on top of being married. and of course ilya wouldn’t be wiling to marry someone that doesn’t make him laugh or understand his type of humor. the chemistry of hockey husbands are in and out of the rink. that’s soulmates shit fr
I have this marketing idea for season two where they create an actual ottawa centaurs instagram account and post a bunch of in-character content as if it was a real hockey team being run by a real guy and also this is how they announce the actors playing them
bonus idea that works with that and that i've thought about an unhealthy number of times: official ilya instagram account where he posts all the pics that shane eventually realizes are about him/their relationship. every week there's new posts relating to whatever happened during the episode.
The MHL decides to partner with Heartthrobs Against Heart Disease for their 2018 fundraising calendar. It's a Canadian non-profit that features various Heartthrobs in various states of undress at their various jobs. They had firefighter editions, teacher editions, and even farmer editions. The MHL sent out an email to a few dozen of Canadian players, asking if anyone had a free day over the summer.
Yuna Hollander does not hesitate to scoop that charitable opportunity up.
They get their 12 players, one for each month. Shane gets his birth month, May. The tagline on top of his photo is: "I may be a two-time Stanley Cup winner, but I still get checked regularly for early onset heart disease."
During the following preseason, Ilya walks in on the Bears howling with laughter about something. Never one to be left out, Ilya demands to know what's so funny. He's passed a Heartthrob Against Heart Disease 2018-2019 calendar and joins in on the laughter as he flips through these idiots. That is, until he gets to May.
Shane is on the ice, a hockey stick slotted across his broad shoulders, arms draped over it. He's shirtless, only wearing gloves and his baggy hockey pants, ridden down on one side to show off the top of his underwear and the deep V just above his hips. They must have had him do pushups because his abs are more defined than usual, deep cuts across his stomach shimmering with a thin layer of sweat. His hair was messed up, like someone had run their hands through it. He was looking directly at the camera, a little smirk on his face like he knew exactly what he was doing. His biceps...
The calendar was snatched from him, which was probably a good thing, if the saliva pooling in his mouth and the tightness of his pants were anything to go by.
That night, away from any prying eyes and on a private browser, Ilya navigates to the Heartthrobs Against Heart Disease website. He about blacks out when he sees the Special Edition: Oops, All Hollander!
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Shane has a reputation of being intelligent, not just bc of his hockey IQ and studious manner, but because of his taste in movies. Hollander's watched a lot of art house films, indie films, foreign films, European films. You know, classy stuff. He's seen everything, though- big budget Marvel, direct to video/streaming, all the mainstream movies, too, but also a ton of ones a lot of his teammates never bothered with. Everyone thinks Shane only eats and breathes hockey, but his teammates know he's also a film aficionado, and he's always their ringer for trivia nights. It's just another weird Hollander quirk... Shane never admits to himself why he started getting into those kinds of films as a teen... at least not for a while.
They all frequently featured hot, naked guys with accents who made out. Gaspard Ulliel, Louis Garrel, Pierre Perrier, Daniel Bruhl, David Kross, Diego Luna, Gael Garcia Bernal, Henry Cavill, Charlie Hunnam...
When he and Ilya start talking about their favorite movies and they watch some of Shane's favorites together... Ilya immediately clocks his shit. And is very amused. Shane's a little embarrassed. But then he gets naked with his hot boyfriend with an accent and they make out.
The best and coolest thing about Ilya is that he’s literally nice. He’s going to former teammate’s funerals, he’s hanging out with sick kids without his teammates, he’s making Shane his gross macrobiotic meals, he’s helping every other character process their gay thoughts. He’s literally the nicest firetruck of all time. AND he’s a bitch. It’s awesome
ilya's obsession with grabbing shane's jaw......turning shane this way and that by his jaw.........shoving shane back by his jaw.......clenching his hand around shane's jaw.......stroking shane's jaw......sucking shane's jaw........smacking shane's jaw......opening shane's jaw to slide his dick, his fingers, his entire gigantic desire into shane's throat.....woweeeeee
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this is about the death penalty and its also about call out posts about people who have already apologized for things they did a long time ago and it’s also about using ‘toxic’ or ‘abuser’ as if its an immutable class of person, and its also about any other circumstance with permanent consequences or wherein you assume someone is still the same person they were.
Boston WAG chat this, Montreal WAG chat that, give me the fic where Kip and Kyle drag Fabian into a groupchat for "Normal Gay Boys Who Did Not Ask To Be Dickmatized By Hockey Jocks, AND YET"
My low stakes heated rivalry headcanon is that Shane 100% had a brief cameo in Crazy Rich Asians. Like maybe he was on a poster or a billboard in the background, or they briefly show one of his commercials or post-game interviews where he’s all sweaty and handsome
For the Centaur socials, Harris decides a cute idea would be to ask each of them to pick a song they feel describes their career with the NHL.
Some choose songs about working hard. Some about having fun. Some about winning. (Maybe Ilya chooses one that highlights how his and Shane’s careers are intertwined).
But when he asks Troy, he thinks for a second, then grins. “Shout Out to My Ex.”
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