YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE

I’m sleepy but wanted to post this before the day is over in the Land of Rising Sun...

Dear Ryo-chan,

✨✨✨ HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! ✨✨✨

🍀 May you be happy and healthy ‘first and foremost’ so that you can keep on challenging yourself! 🍀

Normally (for me since 2007), my agenda for the November 3rd is just to wish you HBD but this year it’s more significant because:

(1) I start a new career today! It’s going to be quite challenging but what’s life without it?! I’m quite looking forward to keep on knocking all those walls and ceilings down! One at a time!!

(2) I’m looking forward to having a new leader for my second home — enough said.

Anyway, I’m glad to have more personal significance(s) attached to November 3rd❣️❣️❣️

Hope you’ve had / you’re having enough fun today! 🤗💖🦋

Dear Ryo-chan,

‘ TO.MO.KO... ’ is such a great song! I’m not a fan of dialogue/monologue in songs but I love the second part to bits!! Don’t even remember how many times I’ve been listening so far!!!

So sad AND so beautiful... I’m glad we got to hear you sang this❣️❣️❣️

Wahhh... I hadn’t posted anything since the new year?!?!?! Oh well~

Dear Ryo-chan,

It’s been a while! How are you doing?! Hope you’re well and everything 🙏

I miss your singing on KanJAM 😭 (well, it’s not like I’d been watching it anyway)... Do hope to listen to your cover album filled with all your favorite songs and/or all songs you want to cover... one day!

Seems like it’s my turn this year to end a looooong chapter in life in September...! Hopefully my October (or, November, rather) will be as great a new start in life as yours last year (to the extent possible). I would’ve been more excited about all those new adventures waiting for me if it weren’t for the fact that being healthy itself is an adventure and a blessing already nowadays! 🙄

BUT! HOME!! AND! I’ll be closer to you soon!! 🎋

I might even be able to come see you (during your future tour(s)) some time post-COVID19 (vaccine)! Or, just... visit JP for a food tour 😁

Was feeling a bit sad about losing the freedom that I can enjoy here, but now I can see a silver lining! It’s amazing how you can make me smile just by existing! Idol through and through, huh?! ✨💖✨

Okay, bye bye for now~!

It’s still the 1st where I am, so I guess I’ll start with “HAPPY 2020!” though I doubt the content would be altogether ‘that’ happy...

Didn’t really plan on writing anything today... but was on Netflix just now, and Arashi’s documentary ‘Voyage’ showed up as recommended (and surprised the heck out of me!)... Watched the first episode (rather, the only available one), and it kind of set off (some of) the things I’ve been wanting to get off of my head...

Gonna back up for a bit...

Well, 2019.09.05 happened, and even though I wasn’t particularly surprised (I could never have held out for this long, if I were him), I must’ve felt sadder than I realized myself... and that’s probably why I hadn’t been watching anything J-ent-related (dramas and variety shows) since then...

Before, outside of JAM and Chronicle, I caught up with VSA and AnS, and if I like the song they’re promoting, Arashi’s performances on music shows... So, obviously, I’ve been out of touch with all of them for about four months now... but, accidentally stumbling upon and seeing Voyage made me feel... sad, in a sense... I was just a casual fan of Arashi (read: never spent money on them), and currently not following any of their social media, but still... ... ...

Oh, well... life goes on... is how I’m gonna lamely end this entry, I guess...

No, I lied... “May 2020 be a better year than 2019, for all of us!” would be the (lamer) end of this entry...

No, I’m definitely NOT complaining 😎; just getting super excited (at the wrong timing 😅).

Nonetheless, have a good rest after the second show of the day, today! Next is Osaka! Are you excited?!

K; have a good night (Friday’s for me and Saturday’s for you)! Bye bye!! 👋👋👋

Felt like this entry cannot wait until the weekend for some reason...

Hi, Ryo-chan!

How are you doing?

Be well, okay?!

Trust your instincts, and also trust that you’ve made the right choice!

Time has a curious way of resolving things, in a grand fashion — do just believe that! 😇

On a light note — take care (especially of your throat) so that you can have fun performing two shows in a day on Saturday!

Wishing you all the best, as always! 🍀

P.S. Age is just a number... let’s advance our years by counting experiences gained and goals to be accomplished / purposes to be fulfilled, as opposed to giving in to societal pressure based on some arbitrary number!

P.P.S. I can only imagine the reason behind and I’m definitely not the right person to have a say on the subject, but I’ve the same attitude as above towards the ‘M’ word... As long as I can believe that I’m living my life with a purpose, I couldn’t care less what people have to say 🤷‍♀️.

So, hold your head up, and let’s live each of our lives with a right proportion of caution AND recklessness!

Dearest Ryo-chan,

Hope you had a rather good day on the 3rd on your end of the world... though I imagine it might have been quite a tough feat what with imprints of your old agency being all over the places... hmm... let’s leave it there, I guess...

I did put off watching the 15-sai DVDs until today because I wasn’t sure how I might react to it... but I did finish watching everything right before the 3rd ends on my end of the world... I think I did get a closure now to leave everything behind as well... I guess it had been a long time coming for both of us, huh...?!

I now consider myself not just a fan; but also comrades who have chosen to fight alone in each of our own battles. Let’s do better than our best, yeah?!

So, “Happy (belated) Birthday, Ryo-chan!” I hope that you can successfully see to the end(s) of wherever your aspirations take you!

Also, I wish you all the best for the upcoming live performances! ‘Nomad’ is such a great song!

~ sincerely yours ~

Why in the world did my eyes get sweaty after hearing “Hajimari no Ippo-da!” ?!?!?!

Dearest Ryo-chan,

How are you doing? I hope you’re keeping yourself occupied enough to not have time for all things negative...

It broke my heart when I noticed how sad you looked in (unofficial) 15-sai tour photos... I really don’t know how to help you feel better, even if it’s just for a bit, because, well... I obviously don’t know you in person... to even lend a pair of sympathetic ears! So, I did the next best thing that I can think of — sending you a letter through JFC... This was the first time ever that I’d written/sent a fan letter to anyone!

Twenty-two years out of 35 (since November 3rd is just around the corner) makes for about 63% of your entire life so far, and definitely 100% of your adult life... So, I obviously don’t expect you to completely recover any time soon (you won’t be my favorite if you were that kind of flippant person, anyway)... But I do hope that you get to read the letters from fans all over the world so that you don’t feel like you’d spent the best parts of your life in vain...

Thank you very much again, Ryo-chan!

Let’s try to feel better bit by bit everyday, okay?

The best is yet to come — do believe it! ✨

Dearest Ryo-chan,

How are you feeling? How are you holding up?? Be strong, okay?!

Well, after my first letter-of-support written immediately after the news broke out, this second letter bears a theme of ‘reminding-you-of-a-harsh-reality.’

I’ve been wondering, in the last a couple of days, what kind of thoughts went through you during the last 12 months or so (since the very first meeting-of-doom)...

- That those would be the last time you’d ever performed in the Taipei Arena?

- That, regardless of it being not as prestigious nowadays, you might not be able to perform on the Kouhaku stage ever again?

- That, without KanJAM, the opportunities to collaborate with great artists will be sparse at best?

- That you will no longer have a guaranteed role, let alone being a lead, in a dorama and/or a movie every year?

- Last but not least, that this 15-sai Tour was your very last 5-dome tour, or even the last time you’d ever performed in a Dome?

I’m not fueling the fire but I’m sure you’d thought of these matters ‘and beyond’ thoroughly before coming to this resolute decision...

So, what I really want to tell you is that “what doesn’t kill you will ‘definitely’ make you stronger.” I do hope that you aren’t as fragile as you seemed/used to be because now that you’d made literally a life-changing decision, you just have to see through to it, no matter what.

Okay; now that I’m done with my themed-letter portion, I’ve just wanted to let you know, yet again, that there ‘definitely’ are people, including the strangers that you’ve never met before, who sincerely wish for you to be happy and healthy, above everything else.

I’ll miss you like crazy but please do take as much time as you need to rejuvenate and re-orient yourself before rushing into things and regretting later. Sure, people who are attracted to your ‘Johnny’s-brand’ for whatever reason will phase themselves out but you’ll be happy with whoever stick around, I promise you👌. Please, just “be wise” though 😇.

~ owari ~

P.S. I finally shed a few drops of tears since I first heard the news while listing things you might never get to do again, but you know what? I become quite light-hearted afterwards... Just come back whenever you’re ready! I’ll be waiting for you!!

Dear Ryo,

How are you?

All things considered, I hope you’ll be okay... It’ll definitely take time but you’ll become okay.

Probably because I’ve liked you so much for such a long time I can’t help but draw/find the parallel incidents at our major life-changing events...

- 2004: Your debut with 8-nin NewS and Kanjani8 (I didn’t know you yet but still...)

- 2007: When NEWS came back (I’ve been following you ever since...)

By the way, thank you Kurosagi-Yamapi, you led me to Ryo, and then to K8, a group of people who have been giving me strength through laughter (until last year anyway, strictly speaking).

- 2011: A chapter in your life closed

- 2018 - 2019: Turbulent time period that has led to drastic life-changing decision(s)

- 2019 September: Another chapter in life - closed.

I’m the silent type who hates to draw (unwanted) attention to myself, so I avoid butting heads with people (especially online) but I’ve been thinking, after seeing all those deplorable posts online, since last year that people are just becoming too much in asking a lot from you and taking you for granted (more than ever, I mean) while giving none of the recognition that you more than deserve.

You’ve been running (more like desperately sprinting, anyway) ever since your debut with 9-nin NewS... you never really felt that you truly belonged to either group regardless of all your hard work (twice the groups, thrice the workloads and more than a quadruple of hate from those random entities), and even after you put your roots down things didn’t really change much...

Further, (I personally don’t have a good impression of them but) people whom you’ve mutual affection within the company drifted away and one of your last rocks (that you might not have noticed that he ‘was’) was gone, and another is on a shaky ground himself... and you thought you’d will through and hold the forts with all your might but things just became too much and you just don’t have the energy anymore after all these years (decades, more like) of non-stop sprinting...

Did I get these right? I think I did, partially, at the very least...

I said (after 8-Jida-J, I think?) that it’s time to get exposed to unfamiliar territories and grow as a person by conquering them, even if it’s bit by bit...

With your innate potential and immense experience, I do wish for you to be able to nurture and grow “in the right way” in whatever profession that you end up choosing.

I’d still love to see you act; I’d still love to listen to your songs/singing voice; if possible. Hence, I’ll still be a fan of yours for as long as you stay in the entertainment industry ‘AND for as long as I can still respect your work ethics.’

There’s a saying in my country (paraphrasing in English) — “If you don’t learn from your mistakes, you are a big-time idiot; if you learn from your mistakes, you are on the right track in life; however, you become truly wise if you know how to learn from other people’s mistakes.”

So, please, please, please, “BE WISE.”

You know better than anyone what you’re giving up, so please, just be wise so that you can successfully be free with your artistic endeavors.

Thank you very much for all these years; I’ll forever be grateful for the help that you’d unknowingly provided up to this point.

I wish for you to be free, finally; happy, truly happy; and be able to live a healthy, fulfilling life.

~ owari - part i ~

Dear K8, I guess I will still catch up with you guys like I currently do with Arashi (as in, as a casual fan for group TV shows) from time to time, for as long as the group exists.

For I’ve no interest whatsoever in other J&A groups or talents, this is the end of my chapter with Johnny’s. My only regret would be for not having been to a K8 concert, but then again, I’ll never regret giving my education/career a priority before anything else, so... ... ... Sayonara! It was a great, fun ride.

~ owari - part ii ~

- 2019 October onwards: Life must go on...

My dearest Ryo-chan, let’s just keep fighting and conquering in each of our battles... I truly hope to run into you at least once in my lifetime so that I can convey my gratitude to you in person.

Let’s do better than our best until we meet then!!!