I Miss You • Steph Catley
Request: this is the combination of like 4 different requests and I hope it turned out good
Word count: 5k (so sorry;)
You let out a breath as you lean over your leg to stretch, the rest of your teammates doing the same as they cool down from the training you’ve just had.
Kyra is animatedly speaking to you on your right. The youngster is explaining how she thinks the two of you could link up the best for tomorrow's group stage game against Nigeria. The midfielder and yourself as a forward have had very good chemistry on the pitch in your previous game against Ireland and Kyra was excited to perform just as well against the African team. Your head is turned towards the brunette, however your gaze is locked onto another one.
Emily and Steph are deep in conversation almost opposite you and Kyra and you watch as the defender stretches her hip flexor. Your eyes roam over her body as she pushes her hips deeper and you breathe in deeply at the motion, Kyra’s voice long forgotten.
You can’t tear your eyes away from her, the way her quads flex that bit, and the way her hips are moving. It’s her infectious laugh that breaks you out of your staring and brings you back to earth as Kyra’s voice becomes clearer next to you. As if she feels you looking, Steph turns to where the two of you are and she gives you a beaming smile, one that makes you bite your lip as you smile back at her, trying to withhold the massive grin that would otherwise spread across your face.
“Alright ladies, that’s it for today. Get changed and lunch will be waiting for you in the cafeteria!” Tony announces with a clap of his hands.
This time you make sure to actually listen to what Kyra’s saying as you make your way back towards the changing rooms for a quick shower and change of clothes.
You’re one of the last ones to leave the locker room and you quickly tie your damp hair into a loose bun as you walk towards the cafeteria. Before you can take the last turn a hand grasps your elbow and pulls you away. Your eyes connect with familiar brown ones and you let her lead you away from where you were going.
“I miss you” Steph confesses as the two of you come to a stop near the end of a hallway. You intertwine your fingers as you bring yourself closer to her, a cheeky smile on your face.
“I’ve been here the whole time” the defender in front of you rolls her eyes at the statement before gazing into yours again, her big brown eyes shimmering with nothing but adoration and longing.
“You know that’s not what I meant” she says quietly, almost like she’s afraid someone would hear the two of you.
You know what she means. The two of you hadn’t had the chance to have a moment to yourselves in the last three weeks of the world cup preparations and group games because you were always around your teammates. Despite seeing each other almost every hour of every day, the pair of you hadn’t been able to be close the way you could at Arsenal.
“I know, I miss you too” you admit and Steph smiles at you, leaning into your touch as you lightly cup her face. Her hands slide lower on your body until they take their place on your waist and she pulls you into her embrace. You fight back from smiling onto her lips as the butterflies erupt in your stomach and Steph deepens the kiss as your other hand squeezes her bicep. The kiss is fervent and passionate as your lips meet over and over, almost desperate to be touching each other every time you pull away. The brunette gasps into your mouth as she feels your tongue trace her lower lip and you take your chance to slip it into her warm mouth.
You’ve known your girlfriend long before you transferred to Arsenal from Lyon almost two years ago, thanks to the two of you playing together on the national team. But you’ve never tried anything with her until recently when she hurt herself and you realized just how much you cared for your friend.
Steph had pulled a muscle during a match against Man City and had to be subbed off in the second half. The second the final whistle was blown you were off towards the medical room insearch of your Aussie teammate. You eventually found her lying there but she didn’t seem to be in any serious pain. That didn’t mean you weren’t worried and you made sure to voice your concerns. At first you were confused as Steph only listened to your mini rant, her eyes never leaving you and her mouth slightly hung open. When you finally finished talking your eyes found hers again before they lowered as her tongue wet her lips. Before you knew it you were being pulled down and into a hot kiss by the girl.
Both of you were so immersed in the feeling that you hadn’t thought about your other teammates possibly walking in on the two of you making out until someone’s shoes squeaked against the floor. You abruptly pulled away in panic and found Caitlin staring at the two of you with her eyes wide. She had come in search of the other two members of your Aussie trio at Arsenal to also check on Steph but it seemed like she was doing better than good.
“Woah…Mackenzie isn’t going to like this” were the words that left her mouth and made your blood run cold.
That was the reason why you’ve been keeping your relationship a secret. The West Ham goalkeeper was your older sister and Mackenzie Arnold doesn’t play around when it comes to her little sister.
You made Caitlin promise you to not tell your sister about what she’d seen and the forward swore to secrecy despite her close friendship with Mackenzie. You knew that if your sister were to know about you and Steph she would go absolutely ballistic and her protectiveness over you would shine through even more. The two of you had a very close bond despite the five year age difference and if it weren’t for the goalkeeper you wouldn’t have become a household name so early on in your career.
Like many of your national teammates you made your debut for the Matildas at the young age of 15. This and your talent earned you a spot on the roster for the 2015 World Cup the following year and despite your early exit in the tournament by the end of the summer you had scouts knocking on your front door.
You didn’t want to leave Australia and more importantly you didn’t want to leave Mackenzie. She however, convinced you to sign for Lyon and after a heartfelt teary goodbye you left to join the French club’s B team.
With your sister’s words in your mind - ‘make a name for yourself sooner than later’- you started the 2016 season in Lyon’s senior team. From there you worked hard day in day out to earn your spot on every list and every roster and any award you could receive for your great achievements.
It was difficult at first, being so young and in a foreign country with a weird language but the team helped the best they could. Still, you spoke with Mackenzie every chance you got and you missed her dearly which made you even more excited for international breaks. Your sister was just as eager to see you and made sure to keep you within reach at camps.
The brunette had displayed her protectiveness many times since you’ve left, whether that was in front of your Lyon teammates or the Matildas or just anyone, she was there glaring down at the person from behind you. And that was only if they looked at you the wrong way.
You couldn’t imagine how she’d act if she found out that one of her friends was dating her little sister.
Steph chased after your lips as you pulled away and you gave her another peck before you moved elsewhere.
“I’m so obsessed with you” the brunette’s heavy breathing in your ear made you go crazy and her words only spurred you on as her fingers pressed into your lower back. You nipped at her jawline, tracing the curve of it and then skimmed down her neck.
“My pretty girl” you whispered into her skin and Steph immediately blushed as she buried her own head into the crook of your neck. Her arms moved around your shoulders and you breathed in deeply as you accepted her warm embrace. The two of you stood there hugging for a few seconds, just enjoying each other’s presence. The echo of a door being slammed shut made you come back to your senses and you pulled back from your girlfriend.
“Come, they’ll be wondering where we are” Steph pressed her lips to yours once last time before the pair of you headed towards the cafeteria for lunch.
Upon entering you heard your name being called and found your sister waving you over to her table.
“What took you so long?” the goalkeeper asks you as you sit next to her, Alanna and Caitlin opposite to you.
“Aww don’t be so worried Macca, no one will kidnap me” you could only smile as your sister rolled her eyes.
“I don’t know who would want to” her joke made Alanna snort and you pushed at Mackenzie’s shoulder. “I brought you some food” she nodded to the tray in front of you and you clasped your hands to your heart.
“Chivalry isn’t dead” you gasped and the other two giggled. “Thank you”
The day of the Nigeria match you entered the stadium in better spirits than you left it. The journey back to base camp and the hotel was relatively silent and although you scored one of Australia’s two goals you were disappointed in the way you played.
Your head rests against Caitlin’s shoulder and in any other case you’d be fighting back sleep. This time though your mind was preoccupied with thoughts of what you could’ve done better and how the team could improve for the next group game because the loss meant that now your place in the world cup was in danger.
You’re anxiously picking at the calluses on your hand even though you take good care of them so they wouldn’t harden too much but you couldn’t care less at this moment, far too upset.
A hand grasping your own forces you to stop and you sigh heavily as you turn to bury your head in the forward’s shoulder.
Caitlin’s eyes meet Steph’s who sits in the row opposite and in front of you and she eyes your form in concern. As much as the captain wants nothing more than to take you into her arms and remind you football is a team sport, she cannot do such things in front of your other teammates, under your sister’s watchful eye.
All throughout recovery day Steph’s eyes can’t seem to leave you and she finally gets her chance to talk to you as everyone is told where to go first. She slips in beside you as you exit the room with the others and you offer her a smile. Steph is just about to open her mouth to ask how you’re doing when a taller body joins your otherside.
“What’s up nugget?” Mackenzie’s voice rings out and she pats your shoulder. Steph deflates slightly, knowing she won’t be able to speak to you privately and she’s left to listen to your conversation with your older sister.
You pray Mackenzie doesn’t notice the slight stutter in your voice when your fingers brush against Steph’s. The defender’s hand inches closer and grazes yours again but you don’t give into the temptation in fear that the keeper would notice. You’re so focused on trying not to hold her hand that you can barely pay attention to what your sister’s saying, once again too distracted by the defender.
A relieved sigh leaves Steph’s mouth when Mackenzie bids her goodbye to head towards the physios while the two of you continue towards the ice baths. This time you aren’t shy to take her hand into yours.
“Stephy baby” the brunette grins at you as she squeezes your hand and you lean into her slightly though still alert in case someone sees the two of you.
“Are you okay?” she voices her concern and you beam up at her.
“I am now” your words and the cheeky smile on your face has the brunette swooning and she presses a lingering kiss to your cheek before you open the door to the pools and the two of you reluctantly pull away.
Alanna and Caitlin’s laughs reach your ears before you see them, the pair having also been instructed to start with the ice baths as recovery.
“Come on mate, you’re so slow!” Alanna calls out to you from her place in one of the pools. you raise the shorts you’ve just pulled off into the air, threatening to throw it at her if she keeps rushing you.
Your Arsenal teammates laugh at your antics, the brunettes already in their own pool.
“Can’t even wait a second” you jokingly murmur under your breath as you round the pool to where Alanna is floating around. When you reach the edge you realize that she has made it into the deeper end of the pool but you’re too lazy to walk all the way back to the other side.
“Lani, help me in please” you reach your hands out towards the blonde who chuckles at your distress and paddles closer to the edge. Your hands settle on her shoulders while hers are on your sides as she helps you lower yourself into the cold water.
Upon entering a loud squeal leaves your mouth and the three are once again left to laugh at you. You instantly cling to your sister’s best friend who doesn’t mind it at all as she hugs you, continuing to laugh as your teeth chatter.
“So dramatic” she huffs and you shoot her a glare. “You are such a baby” you know she means no harm, jokes like this were pretty common amongst you.
“Yeah, well deal with it”
Steph watches with a fond smile on her face, her own arms crossed over her body and she almost jumps in place when a smirking Caitlin appears in her line of sight.
“You’re not jealous are you?” If only Caitlin knew the reason she was staring so hard is because she wants to be able to hold you like that without a care in the world about who’s watching. “You know Lani’s like her second sister”
“And you’re her third” Steph adds with a chuckle as Caitlin smirks proudly, shrugging her shoulders as if to say ‘that’s right!’.
It wasn’t unusual for you to be so affectionate with your teammates, especially the ones on your national team. When you first got called up as a young 15 year old, you stuck close to your sister’s side for the first few camps which meant you stuck close to her friends too. Alanna, Caitlin, Sam and Hayley were quick to take you under their wings and you were grateful for them. You basically grew up with the girls and you still maintained this close relationship.
You missed them as well when you moved to Lyon but you were overjoyed when Ellie joined the French club too.
When game day finally arrives you’re more than ready to show Canada just what you’re capable of. The team is well aware that the world assumes today will be an easy day in the office for the North Americans, but your team also knows just how wrong they are about that.
It is immediately clear that although the team is the same that won Canada their Olympics, they’re not playing like Olympians. Instead the ball remains almost only in the Matildas possession and it doesn’t take you long to ease the crowd’s nerves.
Just six minutes into the game Kyra catches a misplaced pass and sends it over to Caitlin who races up the field through the reds and then slides it over to you. You fool Buchanan with a body faint to the left and then move to her right before you rocket the ball past the goalkeeper.
You’re off in a sprint immediately and you almost land on the corner flag as you jump in celebration. Caitlin catches up to you just a second before the others do and they dogpile the two of you, smiles blinding. You’re eventually pulled to your feet by Hayley who proudly kisses your forehead and you catch a glimpse of your benched teammates returning to their seats.
The performance from the Matilda’s is one you know people will be talking about for years to come as Hayley and yourself each slot in another goal before the halftime whistle.
“I’m so proud of you sis!” Mackenzie lifts you into her arms as you make your way off the field and your cheeks burn at the compliment.
“Thanks Macca” she flashes you a big smile, one of those that you know is only reserved for a select few and she squeezes you one last time before letting you back on your feet.
“My little hero, huh?” she quizzes jokingly and your sister pulls your head back into her chest as you near the tunnel.
There really isn’t much to say during the halftime talk but Tony makes sure to voice his joy.
Your eyes shine bright as you listen to your girlfriend make her captain’s speech and you admire her in all her glory. She looked so good in the blue kit it made you drool and you’re knocked out of your trance by Caitlin’s elbow digging into your side. Steph finishes with a simple ‘let's continue keep going!’ but it has everyone pumped for the second half.
Despite the four fresh players on Canada’s side it doesn’t help them much with turning the game around and your heart almost leaps out of your chest in ecstasy when Mary gets her first goal of the tournament. The young City player was one of your good friends and you had been waiting for her to get her moment to shine and she has delivered it perfectly.
It is clear that the Canadians are upset by the goal difference in just the 60th minute of the game. It’s getting to be near impossible for them to make it out of the group stages while the Matilda’s are cruising away with a seemingly easy victory.
The reds start getting more physical, more aggressive and your blood boils when Hayley ends up on the ground for the second time in ten minutes.
You’re determined to get payback for it and you get your chance to do so when Ellie sends a long ball towards you. You control it perfectly before Viens even gets to think about it and you speed off towards the goal.
Buchanan’s nostrils flare as she squares up like a bull. You’re coming in hot but she doesn’t hesitate to match your fire and she dives in without much thought.
Everything goes silent around you as you watch the Canadian grit her teeth under you. A yelp leaves you as her studs slide across your thigh and her other leg knocks into the side of your other leg. You damn near do a side flip in the air before you land painfully on her foot that’s still raised, studs facing upwards. The crowd is screaming and it is almost deafening the referee whose whistle is fortunately still heard by the players. Your body flops limply off Buchanan as she pushes you away from her, studs still embedded into your side.
The ringing in your ears is loud and your arm remains cradling your side, feeling absolutely winded. You gasp into the grass, attempting to force air into your lungs but it’s all too painful and your eyes water.
Your sight is blurred with tears but you can see blobs of turquoise running towards you. Steph’s body is quivering with fear and worry as she reaches you first, closely followed by Caitlin and Emily. One of her hands finds your face as the other rests on your back.
“Breathe Y/N, breathe please” you don’t notice the shake in her voice but the other two do who jump into action trying to help you as best as they can.
Mackenzie stares at the big screen in panic as they replay the foul and she holds onto the goalpost knowing it is the only way she could stop herself from running across the field. However, as soon as she sees you on the screen and the blood on your thigh she abandons her post and races past the medics running onto the field.
“Y/N!” she calls out as she arrives at the scene, the medics hot on her tail.
“I’m okay, I’m okay” you let out between gasps before you let your head fall against Steph’s thigh, the defender’s hand resting on the top of your head. The medics instantly move to assess the damage and one of them lifts your shirt as the other wipes the blood off your leg.
“Oh what the…fuck” Mackenzie’s face contorts into sorrow as she recognizes the stud patterns on your ribs. By now the team is crowding you with the referee also standing close by just in case.
“I’m good, it just hurts a lot”
“So you’re not good” your sister deadpans and even though you’re in pain you find the energy to roll your eyes at her.
“Y/N/N you’re going to have to go off” Alanna speaks from above your sister who nods along.
“No, I don’t want to” you shake your head, choosing to ignore the sighs both Steph and Caitlin let out from beside you.
“Well you are” one of the medics interrupts before helping you sit up. Mackenzie is quick to stand by your side and with her arm around you, you’re led off the field and towards the bench.
“Take care of her please” your sister nods towards Sam who’s already holding an ice pack for you.
There’s still 20 minutes on the clock and as the time ticks off the pain in your ribs seems to ache less. When you see your girlfriend step up to take the penalty in the 94th minute you’re on your feet by the sidelines. You know where she’s going to shoot it and she glances towards the bench to give you a smile before the whistle is blown. The ball sails past Sheridan smoothly but all your focus is on Steph as she runs towards you.
“YES BABY!” Your hands find her face as you scream into her face, her own arms spread as she braces for your teammates.
This time it’s Alanna’s turn to stare up at the screen as they replay the goal and then the celebrations. She squints her eyes as she tries to lip read, having not heard what you said. A moment later her eyes widen in shock and she glances behind her to where Mackenzie is standing in goal, wanting to check if your sister saw that too. The brunette seems to have her focus elsewhere and Alanna decides not to mention it even on the way back to the hotel, for your sake. And of course because the team is happily celebrating and shouting on the bus the whole 30 minute drive.
Later that night you find yourself wandering into the common room of base camp and you smile to yourself when you see your girlfriend laid across one of the beanbags, her nose deep in the card album in front of her.
“Well hello Stephy!” your warm voice makes her look up and a grin instantly takes over her expression. She’s glad to see you in much better shape and judging by the carefree look on your face, the medics have told you not to worry too much about the bandages on your thigh and side as it wouldn’t keep you out of the next match.
“Hey puddin’!” she pats the space next to her and you eagerly plop down and snuggle into her side. “Is everything okay, pretty girl?”
You hum at her in answer as you gaze into her eyes. Your hand reaches out towards her and your fingertips skim over her skin, lightly tracing her cheekbone and Steph stares at you in a dreamy state. She sits up straighter to be closer to you and she cups your cheek to run her thumb along your bottom lip.
“I was so scared when you went down today” she whispers into the air between you, her eyes jumping across your face almost like she’s trying to memorize every detail. Just as you open your mouth to speak she leans in to claim your lips as hers. Steph kisses you deep and slow, pouring every ounce of her love for you into the kiss and you melt against her, turning putty in her hold.
“You’re messing around with my little sister?!” the loud screech makes the two of you jump apart and you stumble to your feet as your sister comes into view.
“Macca…” you nervously call out to her. Alanna and Caitlin appear behind her too, alerted by the scream.
“Oh no, don’t try to save her guts!” your sister stares right past you to Steph who shuffles nervously on her feet, a petrified look on her face and you suddenly feel even more guilty.
“What is this Steph, hmm? Are you fucking my little sister?” she asks coldly and you frown at her. You turn to your girlfriend who lightly shakes her head at you, telling you not to try and stand up for her. Mackenzie huffs at the exchange between you and she chuckles humorlessly, staring deeply into the defender’s eyes.
“You know, when I told you and Caitlin to take care of her at Arsenal, this isn’t what I meant. I didn’t mean to date her!” she spits and you suck in a harsh breath at her tone. You were also unaware of the fact that she asked the two to watch out for you.
“Mackenzie.” Alanna’s voice makes her falter for a second and Caitlin takes this as her chance and she leads her club teammate out of the room before this could escalate even more. You whisper a small sorry to them as they walk past you.
“How long has this been going on?” you can’t lie to your sister, the both of you are very aware of that fact.
“Seven months” you shrink in your place as you see the frown on her face deepen.
“Unbelievable.” the goalkeeper shakes her head and you turn your gaze to the floor. “Why not Ellie, or Charli, or Kyra, the two of you are best friends anyway.”
“Mackenzie!” an offended call of her name makes her look at you, well aware of how stupid her statement was. “Because I chose Steph and Steph chose me.” you tell her before your voice turns quiet. “And I’m in love with her”
Your sister stares at you in disbelief and she shakes her head again like she’s disappointed.
“I need a moment to think about this” she mumbles as she turns her back to you. Your expression breaks as tears threaten to roll down your cheeks.
“Y/N, leave me alone.” she basically flees the scene and you’re left to crumble into a mess of tears in Alanna’s arms.
“She’ll come around, give her a second” the defender murmurs into your ear and you nod into her shoulder as you calm down. Alanna’s lips form a small smile as she presses a kiss to your head. “I’m really happy for you though”
“Thank you Lani” you mumble.
You can’t fall asleep. You’re trying so hard to let your mind rest but you’ve been staring up at your ceiling for the past four hours. Finally coming to the conclusion that this wasn’t going to work out unless you eased your stress by what’s causing it, you wander down the hallway.
You knock quietly on the door and a few moments later the same defender that held you just a few hours ago opens the door for you. Alanna offers you a comforting smile as she lets you in.
“I was just about to go shower” you don’t comment on the fact that it’s 2am and she’s only now going to shower, because neither of you are supposed to be awake. You pretend not to notice the pointed look she gives your sister as she makes her way towards their bathroom.
You stand uncomfortably in the tensely silent room until you hear the shower start running and you finally look towards where Mackenzie is sitting up against the headboard. She stares at you for a second before slowly nodding her head to the space by her feet. You take her invitation and sit by her, waiting for her to say something. She never does though.
“Macca, please” you plead with her, your eyes tearing up slightly. The two of you rarely got into fights so not getting along was very overwhelming for the both of you.
“Please don’t hate me” you croak out. The statement breaks your sister’s heart and she looks at you guiltily as her face softens.
“I could never hate you” she whispers as she opens her arms. You let yourself fall into your big sister’s embrace and she wraps her arms around you tightly. “You’re my baby sister, too important to me.”
You only nod into her neck, understanding exactly why she was so overprotective of you.
Still, you can’t help but ask that one question.
“Are you mad at Steph?” there’s a beat of silence before you hear her sigh.
“No, Y/N/N. I’m sorry I made you think I was.” Clearly whatever talk she had with Alanna just before you knocked on their door has payed off.
“So you’re okay with..” you trail off, not sure what reaction to expect from her.
“Yes, I’m okay with you and her.” you involuntarily let out a giggle of glee but Mackenzie follows with a laugh of her own. “Go to your girl, I’m sure she’s dying to see you”
You all but hop off her bed and she gives you a grin, realizing all she’s ever wanted was for you to be happy and if Steph was the one who made you happy then so be it. You give her a big kiss on the cheek and then you dash out of her room and back towards yours, knowing your girlfriend was bound to be somewhere close by.
You find Steph sitting on the edge of your bed, anxiously biting her nails as she stares off into the distance.
“Stephy!” she’s up on her feet in an instant, and she catches you with ease as you barrel into her. A wave of relief washes over her as she takes in your excited expression, knowing that whatever had happened, it meant the two of you would be okay.
“I love you so much” she breathes out, her brown eyes shimmering in the dimly lit room but you recognize the look in her eyes.
“I love you so so much” she repeats and she doesn’t let you answer as she dips her head and connects your lips, immediately deepening the kiss in desperate need to feel you close.
You don’t have to tell her you love her just as much, because she knows it and she’s ready to show the world how much you mean to her. After all, you did get the Mackenzie Arnold approval.
