horse and rabbit blog

mongol scout: yeah here are those animals i was talking about

horse: trips on a rock and breaks a leg, dying of shock

horse: runs into somebody, killing them instantly

horse: eats a bird straight out of the air

Turns out it was triple negative breast cancer that had spread to her lymph nods. Mastectomy, radiation and chemo saved her life.

This could SAVE a life.

Penny Chenery, owner of the greatest horse to run this Earth and the First Lady of Horse Racing, passed away today due to stroke complications. She was 95.

Penny and her beautiful horse, Secretariat, have been some of my biggest role models since the moment I found out about this red wonder horse. As a young kid, I watched the movie Secretariat over and over, memorizing each scene, and crying every time that beautiful horse came galloping down the track. I looked up to Penny with all the respect in the world. She was an inspiration to me, and any girl that felt as if “they couldn’t do it because it was a man’s thing.” She stepped into a world that was dominated by guys, and made a name for herself, and a big name for that matter.

Her and Secretariat’s relationship was a huge part in shaping how I work with horses, and how I approach obstacles in life. Now Secretariat rests with his groom Eddie Sweat, his trainer Lucien Lauren, and now, his owner and most devoted fan: Penny Chenery.

Rest in peace you beautiful woman. I’m so sorry I never had the chance to meet you.

Like I said, the museum was a pretty snotty institution. It’s got a LOT of objects it’s way famous for possessing, but nobody knew about the absolutely massive collection of Moche erotic pottery it had because the curators were totally embarrassed by this stuff.

Some examples:

Pretty hot shit, right? They never, ever put any of this stuff on public view or published it in any catalogues but - we legit had like several hundred pieces of Moche ceramics in the “dirty pots” category. Anyway, I was left alone to just do my job with regard to the database for several years, ok? And I figured, well, these’re accessioned objects in the museum’s collection - better get down to bidness. 

I catalogued every goddamn bestiality, necrophiliac, cocksucking, buttfucking, detached penis, and giant vulva drinking cup in that collection. I’d be like, 

A drinking vessel in form of a standing man wearing a tunic and cap. He holds an oversized erection in his hands and stares into the distance (note I did not say “like he’s hella-constipated”). The vessel has a hole at both the tip of the penis as well as around the rim of the figure’s head, thus forcing the drinker to drink only from the penis or risk spilling wine all over themselves from the top of the vessel. Red and orange slip covers the surface of the piece.

Pretty straightforward, right? Apparently the deep seated fear of these objects that the curators exhibited was meant to spread to me as well, but - no one ever gave me that memo, because I guess Midwesterners reproduce asexually. When the curators understood that I had catalogued all of these objects in addition to the other, non-sexy pieces in the collection, they were apparently livid, but knew they had no legs to stand on in terms of getting pissed at me for it. 

I visited the museum’s online public access database a few years back and - every single description I wrote of these pieces has been totally neutered to say something like Male figural vase. 

It isn’t even a lie, I raised that lamb on a bottle from the day she was born, as far as she’s concerned I’m her mom. And as long as I’m vague enough, the problems of dealing with sheep sound totally believable as human toddler parenting problems. “Oh yeah, my daughter’s two, she always puts everything in her mouth.” “Ugh, my daughter is always climbing on stuff, I swear she’s part mountain goat!”

I live for seeing how long I can keep it up before someone asks to see a picture of my little darling. “Sure!” I say, “Here she is! Isn’t she adorable?” then relish the horrified confusion when they see this tiny little brown sheep like: